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Hot in Cleveland is recorded in
front of a live studio audience.
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They canceled your show?
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Yes. The radio station wants a
younger, hipper audience.
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All I keep hearing is
younger younger younger.
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Youth was fine when I was
young but enough is enough.
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Remind me not to get crotchety
like you when I get old.
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Well, obviously I'm just gonna
have to reinvent myself,
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but I don't want to rush it.
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I just need to take my time
and do some real soul-searching.
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The sign outside
said this place is for sale.
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I'll buy it.
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What?
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I've always thought
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running a restaurant would be fun.
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It'll be a new challenge for me.
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I already gave you a new challenge.
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Where's my date?
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Elka is upset that we're not
getting each other dates
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for our birthdays this year,
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because she's found the perfect guy.
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The Pope.
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The Pope?
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I'm adorable. He's infallible.
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We could be a power couple.
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Look at this. No, don't look at it.
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It's Vanity Fair's
"Where are they now?" issue.
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Oh, that's your favorite issue.
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That's where you make fun
of all the celebrities
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who are no longer relevant... oh.
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Well, it is so unfair.
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You make a series
of terrible career choices,
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and you go from Oscar winner
to nobody just like that.
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Oh, I guess I'm just gonna
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have to think long and hard
about how to reinvent myself.
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I'm reinventing myself
by buying this restaurant.
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I'm in.
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All A-listers have restaurants, you know,
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and restaurants aren't like acting.
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They're stable and profitable.
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Well, great, we're gonna be partners.
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How about you, Joy?
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Oh, I can't right now.
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My focus is on Bob and me
adopting the perfect baby,
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and we think we've found one.
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[phone beeps]
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Oh, it's from Chloe, the mother.
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She read my application and loved it.
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"Just one concern.
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Detective work is so dangerous."
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"Not a problem.
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Just bought a restaurant."
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I'm in too.
53
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Yay, we're gonna own
this restaurant together!
54
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Oh, let them say,
"Where is Victoria Chase now?"
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Because the answer is, "She's
in her fabulous restaurant."
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So how are we gonna
make this place fabulous?
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Two words:
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bacon bowls.
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What's that?
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Four words:
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bowls made of bacon.
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Yeah, no, I think we're gonna aim
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a little higher than that.
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I'm gonna start looking for a hot new chef.
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Okay, and I know a fantastic
sommelier back in L.A.,
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and he adores me.
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Fabrice, it's your favorite actress.
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Victoria Chase? Is that really you?
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Oh, I was just telling everyone
how much I adore you
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and miss you.
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Oh, ma cherie, I totally miss you too.
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I'm opening a restaurant in Cleveland,
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and I can't imagine doing it
without you by my side.
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What are you saying, Victoria?
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I'm saying I want you.
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I want you here. I want you now.
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I will do it for you.
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She loves me.
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[upbeat music]
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♪ Ba-ba, ba-ba ♪
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Synced and corrected by oykubuyuk
www.addic7ed.com
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20 minutes to opening, everybody.
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- Oh, it's so exciting!
- I know.
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I invited Chloe, my baby mama.
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Turns out she's a foodie, so it's perfect.
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Victoria, I've chosen this
for the first course,
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an elegant Californian with great legs,
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just like you, cherie.
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Oh...vous.
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Oh, isn't it great the way
you can flirt with Frenchmen
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and it means absolutely nothing?
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I'm going to marry that woman.
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Look at him.
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I still can't believe
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I got Martha Stewart's personal chef.
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Everything smells great, Kameron.
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- Thank you.
- Wow.
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So you cooked for all those
big parties Martha threw.
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God, no. I only cooked for her.
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But you've cooked in a restaurant before.
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Nope.
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This is pretty cool.
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I like this big fridge.
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Melanie, you hired a chef
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who's never cooked
for more than one person?
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I don't know; all I heard was
"Martha Stewart,"
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and I thought, "It's a good thing."
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Well, thank God someone
competent hired the wait staff.
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They're all actors,
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and I didn't think I could
get them, with open auditions
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for Book of Mormon right around the corner.
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- Wait! No! Wait!
- Oh, no!
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- We lost our wait staff.
- This is a disaster.
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Ladies, please, stop yelling.
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I can't handle it when
a middle-aged woman is yelling.
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That's why Martha fired me.
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both: She fired you?
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Middle-aged?
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Stop yelling.
I can't cook if you're yelling.
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Kameron, Kameron, everything's fine.
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We're all calmed down.
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We don't have any waiters.
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And our chef is unstable.
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And we open in 15 minutes.
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It'll be fine.
126
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It'll be fine.
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It'll be fine.
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Kameron, excuse us.
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[all cheer]
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[applause]
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Not bad.
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We got everyone seated.
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Now all we have to do is serve the food.
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This just might work.
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Oh, God, Elka is here with the dog?
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You handle that.
137
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My baby mama, Chloe, just walked in.
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Wish me luck.
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Elka, why did you bring George Clooney?
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It's a health code violation.
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I want to get him blessed by the Pope.
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I told you, the Pope is not coming.
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Did you send that picture I gave you?
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Yes, and as a Catholic, I have to tell you
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that I was very uncomfortable
sending that to the Vatican.
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If you sent it, he'll be here.
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Hora, Elka.
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Holy fu...ugger.
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Good evening, your holiness.
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Please, call me Francis.
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Tonight I am just a man.
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And I am just a woman.
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Beat it, Melanie.
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Oh, my God, the restaurant critic.
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Hide him!
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Hello. Hi, Ross Michaels.
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Yes. Yes, yes, listen.
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I am so excited about your new restaurant,
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especially your chef, who is using some...
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[talking inaudibly]
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Forgive me. I think
I missed that last part.
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Oh, I'm sorry, it's just that when
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I heard that Victoria Chase
was one of the owners,
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I thought, "Well, this is gonna
be one of the biggest..."
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[talking inaudibly]
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It's so great that
you're opening a restaurant.
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I was thinking about being a
chef myself when I was younger.
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Well, it was time for a change.
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The detective business was so dangerous.
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I'm so relieved to hear you say that.
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It's really important to me
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that the baby be raised
in a safe environment.
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No place safer than a restaurant.
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So will your fiancé be here soon?
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Oh, unfortunately, no.
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He's out of the country on business.
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Oh, he's not coming?
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I'm sorry, Joy.
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I'm gonna need to meet him too.
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And full disclosure,
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there's another couple
interested in the baby,
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and I like them very much.
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Wait, no! Brring!
184
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Oh, a text.
185
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Bob's back in the country
and in the kitchen.
186
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I'll go get him.
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You're gonna love him.
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- I need a fiancé.
- What?
189
00:08:01,781 --> 00:08:04,499
Chloe is gonna leave unless I produce Bob.
190
00:08:04,501 --> 00:08:06,751
Got it. Uh, Fabrice, my love.
191
00:08:06,753 --> 00:08:09,838
Would you pretend to be
Joy's fiancé for the evening?
192
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Would that make you love me even more?
193
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How could I love you even more?
194
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Then I don't have to do it?
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Yes, you have to do it.
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The restaurant critic is here.
197
00:08:22,135 --> 00:08:23,935
Oh, great, I'll go out there and charm him
198
00:08:23,937 --> 00:08:25,303
so we get a good review.
199
00:08:25,305 --> 00:08:27,388
Okay, but just so you know,
he's a trailer-offer.
200
00:08:27,390 --> 00:08:28,640
A trailer-offer?
201
00:08:28,642 --> 00:08:30,191
Yeah, he starts strong,
202
00:08:30,193 --> 00:08:32,777
but his voice trails off,
and then he peters out.
203
00:08:32,779 --> 00:08:36,064
So he's a trailer-offer peter-outer.
204
00:08:36,066 --> 00:08:37,065
Got it.
205
00:08:40,987 --> 00:08:43,371
Kameron, where's the kitchen staff?
206
00:08:43,373 --> 00:08:45,206
- I fired them.
- What?
207
00:08:45,208 --> 00:08:47,292
They kept saying things like,
"Where's the food?
208
00:08:47,294 --> 00:08:49,077
People are hungry."
209
00:08:49,079 --> 00:08:51,329
Is that what happens
in a normal restaurant?
210
00:08:51,331 --> 00:08:53,748
'Cause it is really stressful.
211
00:08:53,750 --> 00:08:56,467
So you're gonna do everything yourself?
212
00:08:56,469 --> 00:08:58,469
Yeah, it'll just take a little longer.
213
00:08:58,471 --> 00:09:00,171
Taste.
214
00:09:01,341 --> 00:09:02,924
Oh, my God.
215
00:09:02,926 --> 00:09:05,760
That is the most amazing
thing I've ever tasted.
216
00:09:05,762 --> 00:09:07,762
Nope. It's over seasoned.
217
00:09:07,764 --> 00:09:09,647
Oh, no! That was the first course!
218
00:09:09,649 --> 00:09:11,015
Are you out of your mind?
219
00:09:11,017 --> 00:09:12,600
I'm sorry. Just stop yelling at me.
220
00:09:12,602 --> 00:09:14,102
Okay, okay, Kameron.
221
00:09:14,104 --> 00:09:16,271
Kameron, everything's fine.
Everything's fine.
222
00:09:16,273 --> 00:09:17,772
You can do this, okay?
223
00:09:17,774 --> 00:09:19,574
I'm gonna be here with you
every step of the way,
224
00:09:19,576 --> 00:09:21,609
so let's just make something new, shall we?
225
00:09:21,611 --> 00:09:23,328
You just tell me what you need.
226
00:09:23,330 --> 00:09:24,612
Okay.
227
00:09:24,614 --> 00:09:26,281
Grab that frying pan for me down there.
228
00:09:26,283 --> 00:09:27,282
Okay, frying pan.
229
00:09:27,284 --> 00:09:29,584
Which pan? This one?
230
00:09:42,883 --> 00:09:45,650
Oh, Elka, you're such a charming woman,
231
00:09:45,652 --> 00:09:48,103
but you know this can never be.
232
00:09:48,151 --> 00:09:52,203
Back in the day, Popes got married.
233
00:09:52,205 --> 00:09:54,739
What you say makes a lot of sense.
234
00:09:54,741 --> 00:09:57,959
I don't know if it's the champagne
235
00:09:57,961 --> 00:10:01,546
or your smile talking.
236
00:10:02,916 --> 00:10:05,666
Let's get you more of both.
237
00:10:06,886 --> 00:10:09,053
Ross Michaels.
238
00:10:09,055 --> 00:10:10,088
I know I'm just one star,
239
00:10:10,090 --> 00:10:11,839
but I hope you'll give me four.
240
00:10:11,841 --> 00:10:13,224
Oh!
241
00:10:13,226 --> 00:10:14,892
Well, I have to tell you
that my first impression
242
00:10:14,894 --> 00:10:17,895
of your restaurant is that it
is a very nice environment,
243
00:10:17,897 --> 00:10:19,063
and I'm...
244
00:10:19,065 --> 00:10:21,599
[talking inaudibly]
245
00:10:21,601 --> 00:10:25,236
Well, you don't hear that every day.
246
00:10:25,238 --> 00:10:26,771
What's going on there?
247
00:10:26,773 --> 00:10:28,906
Why are they flirting?
248
00:10:28,908 --> 00:10:30,441
Get your head in the game.
249
00:10:30,443 --> 00:10:32,994
We need to convince Chloe
that we deserve that baby.
250
00:10:32,996 --> 00:10:34,946
But I have no interest in children.
251
00:10:34,948 --> 00:10:36,914
Well, then think of something
you are interested in,
252
00:10:36,916 --> 00:10:39,283
and pretend you're talking about that.
253
00:10:39,285 --> 00:10:43,287
Oh. Ooh, got it.
254
00:10:45,258 --> 00:10:48,543
Chloe, this is my fiancé, Bob.
255
00:10:48,545 --> 00:10:51,763
I was just telling Chloe
how much you love children.
256
00:10:51,765 --> 00:10:52,930
Yes, yes, yes.
257
00:10:52,932 --> 00:10:55,683
I'm particularly passionate
about the babies
258
00:10:55,685 --> 00:10:59,470
currently being produced
in the Napa Valley.
259
00:11:01,441 --> 00:11:02,242
That's so specific.
260
00:11:03,840 --> 00:11:05,923
Bob loves kids from all regions.
261
00:11:05,925 --> 00:11:09,343
Yes, but they must have
a good, strong nose,
262
00:11:09,345 --> 00:11:11,762
and of course you want them to breathe.
263
00:11:13,516 --> 00:11:15,349
Is that even a question?
264
00:11:15,351 --> 00:11:17,568
And I know it's not
the popular thing to say,
265
00:11:17,570 --> 00:11:20,771
but I prefer the white ones.
266
00:11:23,659 --> 00:11:24,692
Kameron?
267
00:11:24,694 --> 00:11:26,744
Kameron, buddy, wake up.
268
00:11:26,746 --> 00:11:28,779
Maybe a little wine.
269
00:11:35,705 --> 00:11:37,421
Yeah, that's better.
270
00:11:37,423 --> 00:11:40,424
Don't you have a call to make, darling?
271
00:11:40,426 --> 00:11:41,509
[phone beeps]
272
00:11:41,511 --> 00:11:42,877
Oh, would you excuse me?
273
00:11:42,879 --> 00:11:45,045
I'm needed in the kitchen.
274
00:11:46,516 --> 00:11:47,631
[phone beeps]
275
00:11:47,633 --> 00:11:48,933
Oh, excuse me.
276
00:11:48,935 --> 00:11:51,135
Hold that thought. Or just keep talking.
277
00:11:51,137 --> 00:11:53,137
I can't tell the difference.
278
00:11:54,690 --> 00:11:55,890
You knocked out our chef?
279
00:11:55,892 --> 00:11:57,775
What will we serve people?
280
00:11:57,777 --> 00:11:58,976
Well, most of the crab
281
00:11:58,978 --> 00:12:00,060
ended up in a big clump in the trash.
282
00:12:00,062 --> 00:12:01,529
Maybe we could still use it?
283
00:12:02,698 --> 00:12:03,898
Five-minute rule, right?
284
00:12:03,900 --> 00:12:05,733
I thought it was the five-second rule.
285
00:12:05,735 --> 00:12:07,818
Not tonight.
286
00:12:07,820 --> 00:12:09,737
- Slap.
- Dump.
287
00:12:09,739 --> 00:12:11,655
- Squirt.
- Slap.
288
00:12:11,657 --> 00:12:13,207
- Dump.
- Squirt.
289
00:12:13,209 --> 00:12:14,909
Wait, wait, wait.
Shouldn't we be wearing gloves?
290
00:12:14,911 --> 00:12:18,045
Really? Now, Melanie?
291
00:12:18,047 --> 00:12:19,079
- Slap.
- Dump.
292
00:12:19,081 --> 00:12:21,665
Oh, shoot, I dropped the crab.
293
00:12:21,667 --> 00:12:23,133
George Clooney got it.
294
00:12:23,135 --> 00:12:25,419
It's okay. We're done. Let's go.
295
00:12:25,421 --> 00:12:26,420
Well, we did it.
296
00:12:26,422 --> 00:12:27,922
We served the appetizers.
297
00:12:27,924 --> 00:12:31,091
This just might work.
298
00:12:31,093 --> 00:12:32,643
(Melanie) Oh, poor George Clooney.
299
00:12:32,645 --> 00:12:37,014
Honey, what did you eat
that made you so sick?
300
00:12:37,016 --> 00:12:38,732
Oh, no. The crab.
301
00:12:38,734 --> 00:12:42,152
All right, we've got
to un-serve those appetizers.
302
00:12:46,826 --> 00:12:48,609
Let me get this out of your way.
303
00:12:48,611 --> 00:12:50,911
Hope you enjoyed it.
304
00:12:50,913 --> 00:12:52,780
Oh, save room for your entrée.
305
00:12:52,782 --> 00:12:56,033
Oh, look, it's Gordon Ramsay.
306
00:13:02,708 --> 00:13:03,958
This is a nightmare.
307
00:13:03,960 --> 00:13:06,293
We need to turn this around fast.
308
00:13:06,295 --> 00:13:07,795
I've already gotten press
for being a failure.
309
00:13:07,797 --> 00:13:09,513
I need this to be successful.
310
00:13:09,515 --> 00:13:11,015
(Melanie) Oh, Kameron's coming to.
311
00:13:11,017 --> 00:13:12,266
I'll help him with the entrée.
312
00:13:12,268 --> 00:13:13,634
You go back to be with Chloe,
313
00:13:13,636 --> 00:13:14,969
and you go back to charming that critic.
314
00:13:14,971 --> 00:13:17,137
- Good plan.
- This just might work.
315
00:13:17,139 --> 00:13:18,939
both: Stop saying that!
316
00:13:22,311 --> 00:13:24,478
Fabrice, how could you leave Chloe alone?
317
00:13:24,480 --> 00:13:26,280
- She's not alone.
- What?
318
00:13:26,282 --> 00:13:28,148
She's with the other couple
who wants the baby.
319
00:13:28,150 --> 00:13:30,067
What? Let's go, Bob.
320
00:13:32,705 --> 00:13:34,989
Hey, buddy, good nap?
321
00:13:34,991 --> 00:13:37,241
Why does my face hurt?
322
00:13:37,243 --> 00:13:38,742
I don't know. 'I'm not a doctor.
323
00:13:38,744 --> 00:13:40,160
Come on, now.
324
00:13:40,162 --> 00:13:41,462
Let's get started on those entrées.
325
00:13:41,464 --> 00:13:43,831
We got 30 customers waiting out there.
326
00:13:43,833 --> 00:13:44,748
30?
327
00:13:44,750 --> 00:13:46,383
That's a lot of people.
328
00:13:46,385 --> 00:13:50,721
Well, just think of it as
cooking for one person 30 times.
329
00:13:50,723 --> 00:13:54,008
You know, I always intended to
cook for more than one person.
330
00:13:54,010 --> 00:13:56,176
A long time ago, I cooked for two.
331
00:13:56,178 --> 00:13:57,645
- There was this girl...
- A girl.
332
00:13:57,647 --> 00:13:59,680
I bet she was pretty and... and tender,
333
00:13:59,682 --> 00:14:03,767
with an inch of fat like these pork chops.
334
00:14:03,769 --> 00:14:07,021
So, Chloe, I didn't realize
you were expecting anyone else.
335
00:14:07,023 --> 00:14:09,273
Well, I wasn't, but Gil and
Heidi just happened to show up.
336
00:14:09,275 --> 00:14:10,691
(Gil) Well, the other day,
337
00:14:10,693 --> 00:14:12,660
Chloe mentioned that
the older, unmarried woman
338
00:14:12,662 --> 00:14:16,613
who also wants the baby...
I guess that's you...
339
00:14:16,615 --> 00:14:19,533
owned a restaurant,
so we just had to try it.
340
00:14:19,535 --> 00:14:20,951
Oh, how nice.
341
00:14:20,953 --> 00:14:24,338
Although I can't help noticing
you already have a baby.
342
00:14:24,340 --> 00:14:26,123
Oh, no, this is my nephew.
343
00:14:26,125 --> 00:14:29,126
He's usually fussy,
but Heidi's a baby whisperer.
344
00:14:29,128 --> 00:14:30,928
She's amazing with kids.
345
00:14:30,930 --> 00:14:32,846
I am too. Right, Bob?
346
00:14:32,848 --> 00:14:34,264
Yes, I am Bob.
347
00:14:39,055 --> 00:14:41,972
In fact, just now I whispered a baby
348
00:14:41,974 --> 00:14:44,892
to sleep in the kitchen for our cook.
349
00:14:44,894 --> 00:14:46,060
(Gil) Really?
350
00:14:46,062 --> 00:14:47,561
I'd love to see that baby.
351
00:14:47,563 --> 00:14:48,779
Yeah, I would too.
352
00:14:48,781 --> 00:14:50,064
I think we all would.
353
00:14:50,066 --> 00:14:52,700
And so you shall.
354
00:14:55,071 --> 00:14:57,204
I need a baby.
355
00:15:01,070 --> 00:15:02,487
What do you mean, you need a baby?
356
00:15:02,489 --> 00:15:03,738
I told Chloe I'm amazing with babies
357
00:15:03,740 --> 00:15:05,239
and that I had one in the kitchen.
358
00:15:05,241 --> 00:15:07,458
Oh, God, where am I gonna find
something in here
359
00:15:07,460 --> 00:15:10,211
that looks like a baby?
360
00:15:10,213 --> 00:15:12,463
Oh, hello.
361
00:15:14,250 --> 00:15:15,967
Where the hell is the food?
362
00:15:15,969 --> 00:15:18,085
It's coming. Just go flirt with the critic.
363
00:15:18,087 --> 00:15:20,054
You think I haven't been doing that?
364
00:15:20,056 --> 00:15:22,640
I haven't laughed so hard
at things I don't understand
365
00:15:22,642 --> 00:15:26,477
since my screen test with Jackie Chan.
366
00:15:28,598 --> 00:15:32,567
Where's the grub? My boyfriend's hungry.
367
00:15:32,569 --> 00:15:35,102
The Pope is not your boyfriend.
368
00:15:35,104 --> 00:15:40,608
He just tweeted he's thinking
about relaxing some rules.
369
00:15:42,779 --> 00:15:45,663
Hash-tag, blessed.
370
00:15:47,367 --> 00:15:48,783
Okay, the sooner you're out of here,
371
00:15:48,785 --> 00:15:50,117
the sooner the food will come.
372
00:15:50,119 --> 00:15:51,285
Come on, everybody, out.
373
00:15:51,287 --> 00:15:53,170
Here's my baby. What do you think?
374
00:15:53,172 --> 00:15:54,839
The legs are hanging out.
375
00:16:02,632 --> 00:16:05,182
You're gonna make a great mom.
376
00:16:05,184 --> 00:16:07,101
I need a head.
377
00:16:10,807 --> 00:16:13,975
You are as delightful as you are handsome.
378
00:16:13,977 --> 00:16:17,061
Oh, thank you, but if the food
doesn't come soon, I am sorry,
379
00:16:17,063 --> 00:16:19,647
but I might have to leave,
and in my review,
380
00:16:19,649 --> 00:16:22,366
I am going to have to say
that the service...
381
00:16:22,368 --> 00:16:24,485
[talking inaudibly]
382
00:16:25,488 --> 00:16:27,655
Ross, if you could eat your own charm,
383
00:16:27,657 --> 00:16:29,707
you'd never go hungry.
384
00:16:31,661 --> 00:16:33,077
She's asleep now,
385
00:16:33,079 --> 00:16:36,247
but she wasn't five minutes ago,
right, Bob?
386
00:16:36,249 --> 00:16:37,415
Bob?
387
00:16:37,417 --> 00:16:39,000
Why is she holding his hand?
388
00:16:39,002 --> 00:16:42,753
She's driving me mad with jealousy.
389
00:16:42,755 --> 00:16:44,305
Do we know when the food's coming?
390
00:16:44,307 --> 00:16:45,840
I'm starving.
391
00:16:45,842 --> 00:16:48,559
You know, a woman that forgets
to feed her customers
392
00:16:48,561 --> 00:16:50,895
might forget to feed a baby as well.
393
00:16:50,897 --> 00:16:53,397
Don't be ridiculous. It's nearly here.
394
00:16:53,399 --> 00:16:54,599
Oh, here it is.
395
00:16:54,601 --> 00:16:56,517
We finally got one done. He is so slow.
396
00:16:56,519 --> 00:16:58,352
Okay, I need this for the critic.
397
00:16:58,354 --> 00:17:00,354
No, I need that for my baby.
398
00:17:00,356 --> 00:17:02,690
Please, God, a little food.
399
00:17:09,115 --> 00:17:11,082
You're good.
400
00:17:12,535 --> 00:17:14,619
Now you're giving him the lap dance?
401
00:17:14,621 --> 00:17:16,037
I thought you only loved me.
402
00:17:16,039 --> 00:17:17,121
What?
403
00:17:17,123 --> 00:17:19,373
Oh, Fabrice, look, I know that we flirted,
404
00:17:19,375 --> 00:17:21,542
but I'm not in love with you.
405
00:17:21,544 --> 00:17:22,760
I left my job
406
00:17:22,762 --> 00:17:25,463
at the best restaurant in L.A. for you.
407
00:17:25,465 --> 00:17:30,434
Even worse, I pretend to be the
fiancé of this desperate woman.
408
00:17:30,436 --> 00:17:32,269
I've had enough.
409
00:17:32,271 --> 00:17:34,889
See you at home, Bob.
410
00:17:37,810 --> 00:17:40,394
Look, Chloe, I can explain.
411
00:17:40,396 --> 00:17:41,612
(Kameron) I forgot the garnish.
412
00:17:44,367 --> 00:17:45,533
Kameron.
413
00:17:45,535 --> 00:17:47,284
Chloe?
414
00:17:47,286 --> 00:17:48,569
Is that really you?
415
00:17:48,571 --> 00:17:50,121
You two know each other?
416
00:17:50,123 --> 00:17:53,207
Yeah, we went to culinary
school together in Paris,
417
00:17:53,209 --> 00:17:55,292
and we fell in love,
418
00:17:55,294 --> 00:17:56,661
but then we lost touch.
419
00:17:56,663 --> 00:17:58,379
Wait, she's the girl?
420
00:17:58,381 --> 00:18:00,381
She is.
421
00:18:00,383 --> 00:18:01,749
But you're married.
422
00:18:01,751 --> 00:18:03,084
No, no, I'm not,
423
00:18:03,086 --> 00:18:05,836
and I was gonna give
this baby up for adoption.
424
00:18:05,838 --> 00:18:07,588
That's right, to us.
425
00:18:07,590 --> 00:18:08,639
No, to me.
426
00:18:08,641 --> 00:18:10,424
Look, that wasn't my fiancé.
427
00:18:10,426 --> 00:18:12,560
I told one little lie.
428
00:18:12,562 --> 00:18:14,895
[sniffs] Do I smell roast chicken?
429
00:18:14,897 --> 00:18:18,232
Oh, my God, my baby's on fire.
430
00:18:22,438 --> 00:18:25,272
Okay, two little lies.
431
00:18:28,735 --> 00:18:30,235
Wow, what a night.
432
00:18:30,735 --> 00:18:33,235
How about we go somewhere
where it's dark and quiet?
433
00:18:33,735 --> 00:18:36,486
So I can hear your confession?
434
00:18:36,488 --> 00:18:38,121
Sure.
435
00:18:38,123 --> 00:18:41,991
After we've done something
worth confessing about.
436
00:18:44,746 --> 00:18:46,829
So I come to Rome.
437
00:18:46,831 --> 00:18:48,748
Tell me about our perfect date.
438
00:18:48,750 --> 00:18:52,719
Well, we kick off the night
with theology study,
439
00:18:52,721 --> 00:18:58,057
then, if you're up for it,
wash the feet of some lepers.
440
00:18:58,059 --> 00:19:00,426
How does that sound?
441
00:19:00,428 --> 00:19:04,264
Oh, I just remembered I've got a thing.
442
00:19:04,266 --> 00:19:07,817
Are you breaking up with me?
443
00:19:07,819 --> 00:19:10,937
I want to see other papal.
444
00:19:13,191 --> 00:19:16,075
I'm actually happy Chloe
and Kameron got together
445
00:19:16,077 --> 00:19:17,610
and decided to keep the baby.
446
00:19:17,612 --> 00:19:20,613
And whatever baby Bob and I end up with
447
00:19:20,615 --> 00:19:21,664
will be the perfect one.
448
00:19:21,666 --> 00:19:23,666
It will.
449
00:19:23,668 --> 00:19:26,619
Well, I dumped the Pope.
450
00:19:29,624 --> 00:19:31,257
What happened?
451
00:19:31,259 --> 00:19:34,344
Oh, it would never have worked out.
452
00:19:34,346 --> 00:19:35,962
I'm a dog person.
453
00:19:35,964 --> 00:19:38,514
He's a leper person.
454
00:19:40,185 --> 00:19:42,185
Well, some things just aren't meant to be.
455
00:19:42,187 --> 00:19:43,970
I mean, I did to this restaurant
456
00:19:43,972 --> 00:19:45,555
what the radio station did to me:
457
00:19:45,557 --> 00:19:48,524
change something that was working.
458
00:19:48,526 --> 00:19:50,476
So let's just keep it the way it was.
459
00:19:50,478 --> 00:19:51,978
Agreed.
460
00:19:51,980 --> 00:19:53,613
And why did I go so crazy
461
00:19:53,615 --> 00:19:56,449
about that Vanity Fair
"Where is she now?" thing?
462
00:19:56,451 --> 00:19:58,368
I mean, I know where I am.
463
00:19:58,370 --> 00:20:01,621
I'm right here with my friends.
464
00:20:01,623 --> 00:20:05,958
Plus, I had two men fighting over me.
465
00:20:05,960 --> 00:20:09,495
Was one of them the Pope?
466
00:20:09,497 --> 00:20:10,546
No.
467
00:20:10,548 --> 00:20:11,714
I win.
468
00:20:11,716 --> 00:20:14,867
[laughter]
469
00:20:14,869 --> 00:20:16,419
- Cheers.
- Cheers.