1
00:00:01,311 --> 00:00:04,664
Hello? You are Debbie, yes?
Debbie of Maddox?
2
00:00:04,705 --> 00:00:05,865
The "of" is optional.
3
00:00:05,892 --> 00:00:07,372
Oh! I am so pleased to see you!
4
00:00:07,532 --> 00:00:09,892
I've been in here so long,
my cramps have got cramps.
5
00:00:10,052 --> 00:00:11,812
But I suppose
if you spend years in a box...
6
00:00:11,972 --> 00:00:14,492
You've been in there for years?
What?! How many years?!
7
00:00:14,612 --> 00:00:15,612
I don't know.
8
00:00:15,652 --> 00:00:18,772
34 years, six days and eight
minutes... Oh, and three months.
9
00:00:18,892 --> 00:00:20,092
34 years?
10
00:00:20,252 --> 00:00:23,612
34 years?! Are you serious?!
It seemed like less.
11
00:00:23,772 --> 00:00:26,732
But also much more.
Oh, how I've dreamed of this day.
12
00:00:26,892 --> 00:00:29,332
Though in my dream you
are like a buffalo, but with wings,
13
00:00:29,452 --> 00:00:31,092
and I say "my name is Babbas"
14
00:00:31,252 --> 00:00:33,732
and I show you the message -
oh, that's it!
15
00:00:33,892 --> 00:00:36,812
I have a message for you. Where
shall I set it up? Set up what?
16
00:00:36,932 --> 00:00:38,172
My projector.
17
00:00:38,292 --> 00:00:39,892
Debs? Did you call?
18
00:00:40,052 --> 00:00:43,332
I'm on the phone... Bye...
Sue? Look, I can't do this now.
19
00:00:43,452 --> 00:00:45,492
Can it wait till tomorrow?
20
00:00:45,652 --> 00:00:48,972
What, after 34 years?
Are you BLEEP joking?
21
00:00:49,092 --> 00:00:51,652
Sorry, I lent on the BLEEP button
22
00:00:51,772 --> 00:00:54,412
Oh, no, I did it again!
23
00:00:54,572 --> 00:00:59,172
'Far, far ago,
the ancients wrote upon the scrolls
24
00:00:59,332 --> 00:01:02,772
'that dark forces
would sweep our realm,
25
00:01:02,892 --> 00:01:05,172
'until only Yonderland remained.
26
00:01:05,332 --> 00:01:09,292
'But they telled also of a saviour,
come from a distant world, to save
27
00:01:09,412 --> 00:01:14,047
'us from the shadows, hopefully!'
28
00:01:14,048 --> 00:01:14,951
Subtitles by MemoryOnSmells
http://UKsubtitles.ru.
29
00:01:15,045 --> 00:01:17,691
OK, two questions - are
we still going to the festival?
30
00:01:17,812 --> 00:01:19,212
And, what's this?
31
00:01:19,412 --> 00:01:22,092
Not for you,
and the festival might have to wait.
32
00:01:22,252 --> 00:01:24,052
What?!
He says this is important.
33
00:01:24,172 --> 00:01:25,692
And you trust him?! Cos I don't.
34
00:01:25,812 --> 00:01:26,972
I mean where's he even from?
35
00:01:27,092 --> 00:01:28,732
Clearly, he's from Yonderland.
36
00:01:28,932 --> 00:01:32,052
How do you know? People from Birmingham
have slightly different hands.
37
00:01:32,212 --> 00:01:34,372
Do you want to hear
the message or not? Yes.
38
00:01:34,532 --> 00:01:37,212
No. You're the one who's
always on about my fate.
39
00:01:37,372 --> 00:01:39,652
Now I've been sent a mysterious
message from Yonderland,
40
00:01:39,812 --> 00:01:41,732
that's been in a box for more
than three decades,
41
00:01:41,852 --> 00:01:43,332
and you don't want to know what it
is?
42
00:01:43,452 --> 00:01:45,972
If it means missing Hot Flap
on the main stage at 12, no.
43
00:01:46,092 --> 00:01:47,252
Just play it.
44
00:01:47,372 --> 00:01:48,392
Good.
45
00:01:53,972 --> 00:01:57,612
If you are watching this message,
then, despite my best efforts,
46
00:01:57,732 --> 00:01:59,812
you have become "Debbie of Maddox".
47
00:02:01,212 --> 00:02:03,652
Who is that?
What, him? Can't remember.
48
00:02:05,092 --> 00:02:07,252
As such,
you must listen very carefully,
49
00:02:07,372 --> 00:02:10,372
for this is of utmost importance.
50
00:02:10,532 --> 00:02:13,172
Whatever you do, you must never
EVER...
51
00:02:15,412 --> 00:02:17,452
Aaaaagh! Fire! Fire!
52
00:02:19,092 --> 00:02:20,772
My pleasure. Shall we?
53
00:02:22,292 --> 00:02:23,812
Yeah, Look, we won't be long.
54
00:02:23,932 --> 00:02:25,372
Just try and get that fixed, yeah.
55
00:02:25,532 --> 00:02:28,052
Of course. And stay out of sight.
No problem!
56
00:02:28,212 --> 00:02:30,292
If there's one thing
history has proved,
57
00:02:30,452 --> 00:02:32,692
it's that Babbas can stay in a box.
In fact...
58
00:02:34,612 --> 00:02:36,892
OK, stay in the box!
59
00:02:37,012 --> 00:02:38,812
Always in the box...
60
00:02:41,652 --> 00:02:42,692
Will I need wellies?
61
00:02:42,852 --> 00:02:45,652
No. You don't know what they are,
do you? No idea.
62
00:02:48,132 --> 00:02:49,372
'Husband alert!
63
00:02:49,532 --> 00:02:52,052
'Servers are down so I'm going
to come and work from home.
64
00:02:52,212 --> 00:02:54,852
'Lots to do but that doesn't mean
I won't have time for some
65
00:02:55,012 --> 00:02:56,772
'boom-chicka-wow-wow...'
66
00:03:01,532 --> 00:03:04,132
# Are you coming to the Meadowlands
67
00:03:04,292 --> 00:03:10,492
# Where your brothers
and sisters hold all of their hands?
68
00:03:10,612 --> 00:03:13,132
# And feet
69
00:03:13,292 --> 00:03:15,052
♪ Are you coming to a special
place... ♪
70
00:03:15,212 --> 00:03:17,812
Sean's Beans beans!
Get ya blasted beans!
71
00:03:17,972 --> 00:03:20,372
Come on, what are you waiting for?
Cavalry?!
72
00:03:22,092 --> 00:03:24,492
See, told you, it's great here.
73
00:03:24,612 --> 00:03:26,132
Have a massage or something.
74
00:03:26,252 --> 00:03:28,372
It's all free - VIC passes! Ha!
75
00:03:28,492 --> 00:03:30,172
How'd you wangle those?
76
00:03:30,332 --> 00:03:33,812
He told them that you...
Friend of a friend. Of a friend.
77
00:03:33,972 --> 00:03:38,532
The Chosen One! Oh, my Gods,
it's you, you're actually here!
78
00:03:38,692 --> 00:03:41,612
Please, rub your scent gland on
that? Em... I'll sign it for you.
79
00:03:44,612 --> 00:03:47,852
Here you go
OK, well, that'll... have to do.
80
00:03:47,972 --> 00:03:50,292
Mead! Fizz! Pips! Mead?
81
00:03:50,452 --> 00:03:52,812
No, thank you.
All right, suit yourself.
82
00:03:52,932 --> 00:03:54,612
It was lovely to meet you.
83
00:03:54,732 --> 00:03:56,492
Thank you so much!
84
00:03:56,652 --> 00:03:58,732
It's weird how stuff like that
keeps happening.
85
00:03:58,892 --> 00:04:01,612
Yeah, I don't see what's
weird about it.
86
00:04:01,772 --> 00:04:03,532
Dress your wife up like
The Chosen One!
87
00:04:03,652 --> 00:04:05,412
There you go, mate.
88
00:04:05,532 --> 00:04:08,012
Thank you. Wear it tonight, yeah?
89
00:04:08,132 --> 00:04:09,132
If you must, Gary.
90
00:04:10,292 --> 00:04:13,132
Get your Debbie costumes,
Debbie wigs!
91
00:04:13,252 --> 00:04:14,812
OK, that's a bit weird.
92
00:04:14,972 --> 00:04:18,012
Oh, no, no no, Can't you read?
No refunds, darling.
93
00:04:18,132 --> 00:04:19,572
What? For the wig.
94
00:04:19,732 --> 00:04:22,052
Don't look like one of mine anyway,
looks like dry hay.
95
00:04:22,172 --> 00:04:23,772
Is it dry hay?
96
00:04:23,892 --> 00:04:25,612
Oh, do you see those?
97
00:04:25,772 --> 00:04:29,812
Oh, they're very popular, talking
dolls. Genuine Debbie catchphrases.
98
00:04:31,492 --> 00:04:33,652
I'm The Chowsen One!
99
00:04:33,772 --> 00:04:34,892
What a luvvly caake!
100
00:04:35,972 --> 00:04:37,132
I would never say that!
101
00:04:37,292 --> 00:04:38,812
Well, I'm guessing
they wouldn't sell
102
00:04:38,972 --> 00:04:40,532
if they just
whinged about their kids.
103
00:04:40,692 --> 00:04:43,772
Oh, look! Get your Debbie outfits,
perfectly normal behaviour,
104
00:04:43,892 --> 00:04:46,012
don't be embarrassed!
105
00:04:46,172 --> 00:04:52,972
# We breathe it through our nose
And gills!
106
00:04:53,132 --> 00:04:59,852
# And touch it with our hands
And claw things
107
00:04:59,972 --> 00:05:03,212
♪ We dance and we sing... ♪
108
00:05:03,332 --> 00:05:05,452
Under and over, UNDER AND OVER!
109
00:05:05,612 --> 00:05:13,612
♪ ..Cause we're in love with
everything. ♪
110
00:05:19,612 --> 00:05:24,252
Oh! Kings of Things, everyone!
That was so cool guys, utterly cool!
111
00:05:24,412 --> 00:05:27,092
Don't forget later
on we've got our special guest -
112
00:05:27,212 --> 00:05:29,132
Debbie Maddox is going to be here!
113
00:05:31,012 --> 00:05:33,052
Oh. Did I not mention...?
114
00:05:33,212 --> 00:05:36,372
She'll be telling us how she plans
to bring about global peace
115
00:05:36,532 --> 00:05:38,372
and an end to all pain
and suffering.
116
00:05:38,532 --> 00:05:41,332
That's in half an hour -
just before Blue.
117
00:05:42,572 --> 00:05:46,532
But now, it's a proud moment for our
beloved local greengrocer, Mr Jack.
118
00:05:46,692 --> 00:05:49,492
Whoo hoo! Yeah - as his lad takes to
the stage.
119
00:05:49,652 --> 00:05:52,132
Please welcome, Michael Jack's son!
120
00:05:53,332 --> 00:05:54,852
Oh, no. He's bad.
121
00:05:55,012 --> 00:05:57,732
Let's head backstage!
See if we can blag a backrub.
122
00:06:00,212 --> 00:06:02,932
Don't know where he is...
Oh, murder! There's been a murder!
123
00:06:04,332 --> 00:06:05,412
Oh, that is not cool.
124
00:06:11,092 --> 00:06:14,132
And I completely
understand your beef, your eminence.
125
00:06:14,292 --> 00:06:16,332
I mean I'd be angry too,
if I were in your shoes.
126
00:06:16,452 --> 00:06:18,372
I mean, I'm angry just in my shoes.
127
00:06:21,332 --> 00:06:25,092
My point is my operation here
is about far more than just money.
128
00:06:25,252 --> 00:06:27,252
When you're trying to
apprehend the Chosen One,
129
00:06:27,372 --> 00:06:29,172
there's lots of plates to...
130
00:06:29,292 --> 00:06:31,732
juggle. Balls to juggle...
131
00:06:31,892 --> 00:06:36,492
Then you'll be relieved to hear
I've scheduled you for inspection.
132
00:06:36,612 --> 00:06:37,932
I am sending Admiral Anous.
133
00:06:39,452 --> 00:06:41,172
Anous? Coming here?
134
00:06:42,892 --> 00:06:44,852
How... wonderful.
135
00:06:45,012 --> 00:06:48,052
I've always been
such a fan of his work.
136
00:06:48,212 --> 00:06:50,572
Really? Cos you always said he was
an utter...
137
00:06:50,692 --> 00:06:52,132
Role model! Yes.
138
00:06:52,292 --> 00:06:54,372
Just out of interest,
when is he due to arrive
139
00:06:54,532 --> 00:06:58,092
because you know what, I might just
pop out to get some nibbles...
140
00:07:00,132 --> 00:07:02,572
I'm sure you will extend him
every courtesy.
141
00:07:05,612 --> 00:07:06,612
I'm not here.
142
00:07:09,052 --> 00:07:10,052
What?
143
00:07:10,172 --> 00:07:13,732
Just go about your business
as usual.
144
00:07:16,732 --> 00:07:18,092
Right you are.
145
00:07:18,252 --> 00:07:21,532
Neil -
what's on the schedule today?
146
00:07:21,692 --> 00:07:24,692
We've got: second breakfast,
talk about last night's sport,
147
00:07:24,812 --> 00:07:26,452
nap... Ow! Tour!
148
00:07:26,572 --> 00:07:30,652
I should give you the tour. Shall we?
149
00:07:32,092 --> 00:07:33,332
Me first? OK.
150
00:07:45,412 --> 00:07:47,812
Babbas could stretch his legs
a little bit.
151
00:07:50,492 --> 00:07:52,372
OK...
152
00:07:54,412 --> 00:07:56,252
Look! It's Michael Jack's son!
153
00:07:56,372 --> 00:07:57,772
Excuse me. Excuse me.
154
00:07:57,932 --> 00:07:59,852
I only saw him yesterday
and he seemed fine.
155
00:08:00,012 --> 00:08:01,892
He didn't say
he was going to be murdered.
156
00:08:02,012 --> 00:08:04,012
It's OK, guys - Mountebank's here!
157
00:08:05,932 --> 00:08:07,852
Make way for the detective, guys!
158
00:08:14,132 --> 00:08:15,452
Oooh!
159
00:08:16,532 --> 00:08:20,612
Ahh! Oo-ooh.
160
00:08:20,732 --> 00:08:22,212
Ahhh!
161
00:08:23,932 --> 00:08:25,532
So good, man!
162
00:08:25,652 --> 00:08:28,092
Ah!
163
00:08:39,332 --> 00:08:41,172
The victim is a grown-up
or large child,
164
00:08:41,292 --> 00:08:42,532
in his late teens to early 80s.
165
00:08:42,652 --> 00:08:44,613
The sole of his right shoe is
worn on the in-step,
166
00:08:44,772 --> 00:08:47,372
suggesting he likes pina coladas
and getting caught in the rain,
167
00:08:47,532 --> 00:08:50,132
hates geese and will not drive
in reverse for religious reasons.
168
00:08:50,292 --> 00:08:52,972
Wow! His left arm bends in the
middle, and the condition has
169
00:08:53,132 --> 00:08:56,172
spread to the knees, which combined
with that cloud, something else and
170
00:08:56,332 --> 00:08:59,292
the fact I like those biscuits with
the jam in, can mean only one thing!
171
00:08:59,452 --> 00:09:02,972
This man is selling poisoned mead
and he is the killer!
172
00:09:03,092 --> 00:09:04,252
No, I'm not!
173
00:09:06,212 --> 00:09:07,972
Is he really the best
detective you've got?
174
00:09:08,132 --> 00:09:10,492
Even better - he's the only
detective we've got.
175
00:09:10,652 --> 00:09:13,932
Wow. You guys really make things
easy for evil overlords.
176
00:09:14,092 --> 00:09:17,052
Well, seems my work here is done,
I might grab a beer.
177
00:09:17,172 --> 00:09:19,052
Hang on, excuse me.
178
00:09:19,172 --> 00:09:20,692
I'm not sure that all adds up.
179
00:09:20,812 --> 00:09:21,812
Oh!
180
00:09:21,852 --> 00:09:23,612
How many people here have
drunk the mead?
181
00:09:23,732 --> 00:09:24,932
Oh, yeah. I'm not. Me neither.
182
00:09:25,052 --> 00:09:26,652
You see. And they're not dead.
183
00:09:28,452 --> 00:09:30,452
I have like, a cold?
184
00:09:30,612 --> 00:09:33,332
Young lady, clearly you posses
some limited intellect
185
00:09:33,492 --> 00:09:35,412
and your unqualified
conjecture is a charming
186
00:09:35,572 --> 00:09:38,212
distraction from the constant
churning of my brilliant mind.
187
00:09:38,372 --> 00:09:40,452
But, if we can take this
conversation somewhere
188
00:09:40,572 --> 00:09:41,572
a little more private -
189
00:09:41,732 --> 00:09:45,212
I will explain why my hypothesis
is the only possible
190
00:09:45,372 --> 00:09:48,972
explanation for this
most perplexing of mysteries!
191
00:09:50,172 --> 00:09:52,812
I'm a total fraud!
Please don't tell anyone! What?
192
00:09:55,544 --> 00:09:57,664
It's OK.
Just start from the beginning.
193
00:09:57,784 --> 00:09:58,784
Who are you really?
194
00:10:01,344 --> 00:10:04,664
My name is Leslie John Lesley,
and I was a fisherman's friend.
195
00:10:04,824 --> 00:10:07,584
Sorry? Y'know - keep them company,
make their sandwiches,
196
00:10:07,704 --> 00:10:09,344
congratulate them on their yield.
197
00:10:09,464 --> 00:10:11,224
It all began on my birthday...
198
00:10:11,384 --> 00:10:14,784
I'd been given shore leave,
so treated myself to a luncheon.
199
00:10:14,944 --> 00:10:17,304
Nice little bistro on the square -
I Forget The Name...
200
00:10:19,624 --> 00:10:21,464
Voila!
Oh, thank you, it was lovely.
201
00:10:21,624 --> 00:10:25,824
'I was settling the outrageous bill
when in walked Detective Crichley.'
202
00:10:25,984 --> 00:10:27,824
Ah, Monsieur Detective.
Your usual table...
203
00:10:27,984 --> 00:10:30,984
'He had solved many crimes including
the Sound of the Baskervilles
204
00:10:31,104 --> 00:10:32,624
'and the Great Brain Robbery.
205
00:10:32,784 --> 00:10:35,224
'But along the way he
had made many menemies -
206
00:10:35,344 --> 00:10:36,864
'many enemies, mainly men.'
207
00:10:42,984 --> 00:10:43,984
He-he-he...
208
00:10:46,944 --> 00:10:49,824
'I was due back at the docks by one
and was reaching for my coat
209
00:10:49,984 --> 00:10:52,824
'when I realised he was in distress,
or a very floral jacket,
210
00:10:52,944 --> 00:10:54,424
'either way he was choking.'
211
00:10:56,624 --> 00:10:58,144
'What happened next is a blur,
212
00:10:58,304 --> 00:11:02,064
'but somehow a tiny chancer
ended up snagged on my coat hook.'
213
00:11:02,184 --> 00:11:03,784
Errr...
214
00:11:03,904 --> 00:11:05,584
He's dead!
215
00:11:05,704 --> 00:11:07,384
Who did this?
216
00:11:07,544 --> 00:11:10,464
'He had guilt written all over his
face, well the bit you could see.'
217
00:11:10,584 --> 00:11:11,744
How did you do that?
218
00:11:11,904 --> 00:11:16,464
'I knew I'd done nothing but in the
moment, I just took their applause.'
219
00:11:16,624 --> 00:11:18,744
Before I knew it,
they'd given me his badge.
220
00:11:18,864 --> 00:11:19,864
'Said I had "the gift".
221
00:11:19,944 --> 00:11:22,664
They had me up on their shoulders,
parading me through the town!
222
00:11:22,824 --> 00:11:26,224
I know what that's like. Every time I
turned up at a crime-scene there was
223
00:11:26,384 --> 00:11:28,864
a crowd of them waiting,
watching, expecting...
224
00:11:29,024 --> 00:11:31,784
So...
how many cases have you "solved"?
225
00:11:42,344 --> 00:11:43,464
What are you here for?
226
00:11:43,584 --> 00:11:45,824
Smoking. You?
227
00:11:45,984 --> 00:11:48,624
I imprisoned
hundreds of innocent people. Oh!
228
00:11:50,064 --> 00:11:51,064
I also smoke. Oh.
229
00:11:55,344 --> 00:11:56,504
Hundreds you say?
230
00:11:56,624 --> 00:11:57,744
Possibly thousands.
231
00:11:59,144 --> 00:12:01,184
No wonder the jails are overcrowded!
232
00:12:02,544 --> 00:12:03,544
Ahhhh!!
233
00:12:05,464 --> 00:12:08,264
No, no - but it's not funny is it,
at the end of the day.
234
00:12:08,384 --> 00:12:09,584
It's serious.
235
00:12:09,744 --> 00:12:12,264
We should probably pardon all those
people at some point.
236
00:12:12,424 --> 00:12:14,504
And he can stand down?
Sure, yeah
237
00:12:14,664 --> 00:12:16,224
Can't see why not.
Thank you very much.
238
00:12:16,384 --> 00:12:18,584
And you'll take over.
Erm... Sorry?
239
00:12:18,744 --> 00:12:21,824
He can't stand down without
a successor, Deb-beh.
240
00:12:21,944 --> 00:12:23,144
I've got two lives as it is!
241
00:12:23,264 --> 00:12:24,624
I've got the kids to pick up...
242
00:12:24,784 --> 00:12:26,944
All right, all right, don't bore us
with that!
243
00:12:27,104 --> 00:12:28,584
Find someone else to do it then,
yeah?
244
00:12:28,704 --> 00:12:30,024
And how am I supposed to do that?
245
00:12:30,144 --> 00:12:34,784
I'm sure you'll think of something.
Now then, where were we? Lights!
246
00:12:34,944 --> 00:12:38,704
Urgh! So here's the second beach
we visited - where, once again,
247
00:12:38,864 --> 00:12:41,184
as you can see,
robes were optional...
248
00:12:42,504 --> 00:12:44,584
Onto the Staff Quarters.
249
00:12:44,744 --> 00:12:47,624
We do have electric lights
if the candles fail...
250
00:12:51,344 --> 00:12:55,704
And this is the break-out room.
Where staff take their breaks... Hello.
251
00:12:59,264 --> 00:13:02,544
And this is the torture room.
Where staff get tortured...
252
00:13:02,704 --> 00:13:05,144
For taking too many breaks.
Hello.
253
00:13:07,664 --> 00:13:09,744
So, yeah, we're like a well oiled
machine -
254
00:13:09,904 --> 00:13:13,464
primed and ready to try
and catch The Chosen One.
255
00:13:13,584 --> 00:13:15,424
And we're getting pretty good at it.
256
00:13:15,584 --> 00:13:18,464
In fact, no-one has as much
experience as we have,
257
00:13:18,624 --> 00:13:22,264
trying to catch the Chosen One,
so... Where are they?
258
00:13:22,384 --> 00:13:23,384
Sorry, who?
259
00:13:23,424 --> 00:13:27,704
The other demons. According
to my figures there should be...
260
00:13:30,024 --> 00:13:31,664
381.
261
00:13:31,784 --> 00:13:33,464
Yeah, he got angry and killed...
262
00:13:33,624 --> 00:13:36,784
FOOT AND MOUTH! '94.
Terrible business.
263
00:13:36,904 --> 00:13:38,704
And these are all that remain?
264
00:13:38,824 --> 00:13:40,344
Well, they're all I need.
265
00:13:40,464 --> 00:13:42,664
The cream de la creme.
266
00:13:42,784 --> 00:13:44,504
Don't eat that, Jeff.
267
00:13:51,784 --> 00:13:55,944
I agree.
34 years is too long between snacks.
268
00:13:56,064 --> 00:13:59,024
Dare I venture beyond the box?
269
00:13:59,184 --> 00:14:02,224
Hmm...
270
00:14:02,344 --> 00:14:06,544
Oh! Will wonders never cease?!
271
00:14:06,664 --> 00:14:09,264
A box beyond a box!
272
00:14:09,384 --> 00:14:12,064
Dare I think outside it.
273
00:14:22,104 --> 00:14:24,144
Well, thank you all for coming.
274
00:14:24,304 --> 00:14:27,184
Just so you know, you were
hand-picked... Hello.
275
00:14:29,784 --> 00:14:33,344
You were hand-picked from the
three people that replied to the
276
00:14:33,464 --> 00:14:35,184
advert, so. No pressure!
277
00:14:35,304 --> 00:14:36,624
OK! One victim.
278
00:14:37,864 --> 00:14:38,864
My arm's gone numb
279
00:14:38,984 --> 00:14:40,784
One murder weapon.
280
00:14:40,904 --> 00:14:42,544
Imagine I'm inanimate.
281
00:14:42,704 --> 00:14:45,904
But whodunnit? Did it.
282
00:14:46,064 --> 00:14:48,944
Well, if you look
closely at all the evidence...
283
00:15:01,944 --> 00:15:04,744
And eliminate the impossible...
284
00:15:04,864 --> 00:15:07,544
Oooow! Well, it wasn't suicide.
285
00:15:11,424 --> 00:15:13,984
You should reach the only
logical conclusion.
286
00:15:19,144 --> 00:15:20,144
Was it...
287
00:15:22,704 --> 00:15:23,704
..me?
288
00:15:24,864 --> 00:15:26,584
Can we go now?
289
00:15:26,744 --> 00:15:29,904
Mess of Egg are on the acoustic
stage in ten minutes.
290
00:15:30,064 --> 00:15:33,184
He's alive!
Madam, you have wasted my time!
291
00:15:37,664 --> 00:15:38,664
Oh, I like him.
292
00:15:40,384 --> 00:15:42,024
Yet another box!
293
00:15:42,144 --> 00:15:43,864
But what is beyond?
294
00:15:44,024 --> 00:15:46,744
Is there a box beyond a box,
beyond a box?
295
00:15:46,904 --> 00:15:48,824
If only there were some way to...
Oh!
296
00:16:01,064 --> 00:16:02,344
The sky goes on forever.
297
00:16:03,504 --> 00:16:04,824
Where are the walls?
298
00:16:04,944 --> 00:16:06,864
Where is the lid?
299
00:16:06,984 --> 00:16:08,584
Where does it end!?
300
00:16:08,704 --> 00:16:09,704
Ah!
301
00:16:16,544 --> 00:16:19,384
Safe in the box. Safe in the box.
302
00:16:19,504 --> 00:16:20,624
Safe in the box.
303
00:16:20,744 --> 00:16:22,704
Let's just pick one at random.
304
00:16:22,864 --> 00:16:25,504
Any one of these guys could do
just as good a job as me.
305
00:16:25,664 --> 00:16:28,184
Yeah, you see that's
kind of the problem.
306
00:16:28,304 --> 00:16:30,224
We need to think of some solutions.
307
00:16:30,344 --> 00:16:31,864
Solar-powered paperclips!
308
00:16:33,024 --> 00:16:34,984
I mean - solutions to THIS problem.
309
00:16:35,144 --> 00:16:36,784
And, can we do that
back at the festival?
310
00:16:36,904 --> 00:16:38,704
Because there is a lovely massage
311
00:16:38,864 --> 00:16:41,344
which I'm currently very much
not having.
312
00:16:41,464 --> 00:16:42,464
Oi!
313
00:16:43,904 --> 00:16:44,984
Who stole my drink?!
314
00:16:45,104 --> 00:16:47,264
Cos it was full before.
315
00:16:47,384 --> 00:16:49,704
Was it you? No.
316
00:16:49,824 --> 00:16:51,344
Was it you?
317
00:16:51,504 --> 00:16:55,344
I'm a recovering alcoholic.
I am so sorry.
318
00:16:55,464 --> 00:16:57,264
It's OK, just...
319
00:16:57,424 --> 00:17:00,224
It must've been you!
Let's take this outside!
320
00:17:02,184 --> 00:17:04,544
No, no. Bladder's too small.
321
00:17:05,744 --> 00:17:07,624
What did you say?
322
00:17:07,784 --> 00:17:10,664
His bladder is
the size of a thimble...
323
00:17:10,784 --> 00:17:11,784
It's true!
324
00:17:11,904 --> 00:17:14,824
He would not be able to drink
an ale of that scale without several
325
00:17:14,944 --> 00:17:15,944
toilet breaks.
326
00:17:16,064 --> 00:17:17,784
So it cannot have been him.
327
00:17:17,904 --> 00:17:19,664
So it could have been anyone else?
328
00:17:19,784 --> 00:17:20,784
No, no, no.
329
00:17:20,864 --> 00:17:23,704
There are only a handful of people
close enough to have pilfered
330
00:17:23,864 --> 00:17:25,424
the beverage in the time
he was away.
331
00:17:25,544 --> 00:17:26,584
Go on.
332
00:17:26,744 --> 00:17:29,864
These two are clearly wealthy
and have full tankards of ale.
333
00:17:29,984 --> 00:17:30,984
No motive.
334
00:17:31,064 --> 00:17:34,864
This woman is not
drinking because she is pregnant.
335
00:17:34,984 --> 00:17:36,144
Who had the chop?
336
00:17:36,264 --> 00:17:37,624
I did!
337
00:17:37,744 --> 00:17:39,664
And this man has no arms.
338
00:17:39,824 --> 00:17:42,144
Er...
Which leaves only... HER!
339
00:17:44,184 --> 00:17:47,024
But she said she didn't do it.
Yes. And I can explain that too...
340
00:17:48,984 --> 00:17:51,184
She lied.
341
00:17:51,304 --> 00:17:53,184
I'll pay for it.
342
00:17:53,304 --> 00:17:54,864
Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
343
00:17:54,984 --> 00:17:56,304
We should get a sandwich.
344
00:18:08,304 --> 00:18:12,904
Bing bong! Minions. This
is your 11 o'clock reminder.
345
00:18:13,024 --> 00:18:14,744
Stay evil - OK?
346
00:18:14,904 --> 00:18:17,864
Eh? OK. In other news Allan Kline
passed away in the night.
347
00:18:18,024 --> 00:18:20,944
His body will be fired into space
on Tuesday, no flowers.
348
00:18:22,544 --> 00:18:25,064
Raffle tickets!
If you want a raffle tick...
349
00:18:25,184 --> 00:18:26,704
We have news, your darkness!
350
00:18:26,864 --> 00:18:30,944
One of our spies has sighted Debbie
and is tracking her to The Festival!
351
00:18:31,104 --> 00:18:35,024
Yes! Get in! Well done
you lot, this is textbook stuff.
352
00:18:35,144 --> 00:18:36,144
Watch what happens now.
353
00:18:36,304 --> 00:18:39,264
I'll send them all off
to capture her, bring her back here
354
00:18:39,424 --> 00:18:42,464
and we'll take her before old
Bossyboobs.
355
00:18:44,544 --> 00:18:46,544
Boots, I meant BOOTS!
356
00:18:46,664 --> 00:18:49,264
Um, don't write "boobs", please.
357
00:18:49,424 --> 00:18:51,504
You don't have to write
everything I say.
358
00:18:51,624 --> 00:18:53,704
Would you please stop doing that!
359
00:18:53,824 --> 00:18:55,104
Why are you still here?!
360
00:18:55,264 --> 00:18:58,144
Can I have a raffle ticket?
361
00:19:00,424 --> 00:19:04,104
Good evening, Yonderland,
we're Blue!
362
00:19:05,664 --> 00:19:08,584
The victim's dressing room was
restricted to very few,
363
00:19:08,744 --> 00:19:14,704
so we are looking for someone who
had both access and motive.
364
00:19:14,824 --> 00:19:16,584
Which leads me to you, Mad Donna.
365
00:19:18,504 --> 00:19:20,704
What? Why would I?
366
00:19:20,864 --> 00:19:24,824
Last year's poster.
You have top billing.
367
00:19:24,984 --> 00:19:29,584
This year's...
Bumped for Michael Jack's son.
368
00:19:29,704 --> 00:19:30,764
That proves nothing!
369
00:19:30,824 --> 00:19:34,744
Quite right. And no poison was
found in your dressing room...
370
00:19:34,864 --> 00:19:38,024
Which leads me to think...
371
00:19:39,464 --> 00:19:41,544
As I suspected...
372
00:19:41,664 --> 00:19:44,864
Brasenic!
373
00:19:48,944 --> 00:19:51,704
Here, you've earned this.
374
00:19:51,864 --> 00:19:54,304
More than I ever did...
Because I didn't.
375
00:19:59,944 --> 00:20:01,944
I'd better get back.
376
00:20:02,064 --> 00:20:03,084
Elf?
377
00:20:08,024 --> 00:20:09,184
You're very knotted.
378
00:20:10,264 --> 00:20:11,324
Tell me about it.
379
00:20:13,504 --> 00:20:15,144
Don't you just love a happy ending?
380
00:20:21,144 --> 00:20:23,864
There she is! Grab her!
381
00:20:29,144 --> 00:20:32,224
And I don't know what you've been
writing in that eeny little
382
00:20:32,344 --> 00:20:33,904
book of yours all day long.
383
00:20:34,024 --> 00:20:35,824
But let me tell you this.
384
00:20:35,984 --> 00:20:41,264
I may not play by the rules, I may
not tick all your little boxes.
385
00:20:41,384 --> 00:20:43,024
But what matters is results.
386
00:20:43,144 --> 00:20:46,824
And this result speaks for itself.
387
00:20:47,984 --> 00:20:50,584
Yeah. Uh-oh! Uh-oh.
388
00:20:53,064 --> 00:20:54,824
What?
There's no law against it.
389
00:20:56,464 --> 00:20:58,504
You're enjoying this, aren't you?
390
00:21:17,024 --> 00:21:18,704
Now, I don't want to worry you...
391
00:21:18,824 --> 00:21:20,704
Well, you're doing a great job.
392
00:21:20,824 --> 00:21:21,844
We've got a rat!
393
00:21:23,124 --> 00:21:24,184
Big one.
394
00:21:30,064 --> 00:21:31,064
Don't worry.
395
00:21:31,104 --> 00:21:34,344
It was too much too soon - I won't
be out of my box again in a hurry.
396
00:21:34,504 --> 00:21:36,784
That'd be great.
Just concentrate on fixing that.
397
00:21:36,944 --> 00:21:39,744
The message, whatever it is,
is message important.
398
00:21:39,904 --> 00:21:43,424
There. I'll see you in the morning.
Oh!
399
00:21:47,624 --> 00:21:49,664
Oh! What a lovely cake.
400
00:21:49,784 --> 00:21:50,944
Oh... BLEEP!
401
00:21:50,968 --> 00:22:16,128
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