1
00:00:02,002 --> 00:00:03,765
<i>They say
being a stay-at-home mom</i>

2
00:00:03,837 --> 00:00:06,465
<i>is the noblest</i>
<i>and hardest profession</i>
<i>a woman could have.</i>

3
00:00:06,539 --> 00:00:07,767
<i>But they're all lying.</i>

4
00:00:07,841 --> 00:00:09,103
<i>It's the greatest scam
on earth.</i>

5
00:00:09,175 --> 00:00:10,870
<i>I never have to</i>
<i>put on my pants,</i>

6
00:00:10,944 --> 00:00:12,912
<i>my boobs magically
make baby food,</i>

7
00:00:12,979 --> 00:00:15,311
<i>and I get to spend all day
with my best buddy, Leo.</i>

8
00:00:15,382 --> 00:00:17,009
Hey, Leo, can you
pass the chips, please?

9
00:00:18,518 --> 00:00:19,542
Oh.

10
00:00:22,188 --> 00:00:23,314
Hey, babe.

11
00:00:24,724 --> 00:00:25,748
What the hell
happened here?

12
00:00:25,825 --> 00:00:27,725
Where's...
Where's dinner?

13
00:00:27,994 --> 00:00:29,655
I was in surgery
for six hours.

14
00:00:29,729 --> 00:00:30,923
You didn't
make any dinner?

15
00:00:31,131 --> 00:00:32,393
How could I have done that?
We just woke up.

16
00:00:32,966 --> 00:00:33,990
What'd you do all day?

17
00:00:34,067 --> 00:00:35,534
I think I taught Leo
how to use a cell phone

18
00:00:35,602 --> 00:00:36,864
and we made this.

19
00:00:36,936 --> 00:00:38,096
Ta-da!

20
00:00:38,171 --> 00:00:39,502
Baby's First Enemies list.

21
00:00:39,706 --> 00:00:41,674
There's Princess Charlotte,
Silas Timberlake,

22
00:00:41,741 --> 00:00:43,868
that noisy garbage truck
that wakes him up
every morning.

23
00:00:43,943 --> 00:00:46,639
Did you think about maybe
tidying up the apartment
a little bit?

24
00:00:46,946 --> 00:00:49,176
Oh, that reminds me.
The housekeeper
didn't show up today.

25
00:00:49,249 --> 00:00:50,477
I hope Sylvia's okay.

26
00:00:50,550 --> 00:00:52,609
Plus, I have a garbage bag
full of old Spanx for her.

27
00:00:52,685 --> 00:00:53,674
Oh, I let Sylvia go.

28
00:00:53,753 --> 00:00:55,084
I thought cleaning
would be your job now.

29
00:00:55,422 --> 00:00:56,855
Danny, I can't clean!

30
00:00:56,923 --> 00:00:58,720
I was born in this country
and I'm too lazy.

31
00:00:58,792 --> 00:01:00,555
Min... Look,

32
00:01:00,627 --> 00:01:02,117
if we're going to be
a single-income family,

33
00:01:02,195 --> 00:01:04,026
we can't afford to
eat takeout every night

34
00:01:04,097 --> 00:01:06,565
and have a housekeeper
wait on us hand and foot.

35
00:01:06,633 --> 00:01:07,622
Ma did it with no help,

36
00:01:07,700 --> 00:01:09,327
and she had to work
cleaning hotel rooms.

37
00:01:09,402 --> 00:01:11,734
That's a good point.
I can do this.

38
00:01:11,805 --> 00:01:12,794
That's the spirit!

39
00:01:12,872 --> 00:01:14,772
You're going to be
a great stay-at-home mom.
I know it.

40
00:01:14,841 --> 00:01:16,638
Stay-at-home mom.

41
00:01:16,709 --> 00:01:19,041
Can you remind me
what that job entails?

42
00:01:19,112 --> 00:01:21,239
Cooking, cleaning,
laundry, paying the bills,

43
00:01:21,314 --> 00:01:23,248
waxing the floors,
keeping the piano in tune,

44
00:01:23,316 --> 00:01:24,749
stocking the pantry,
raising our son,

45
00:01:24,818 --> 00:01:26,445
and maintaining
a positive attitude

46
00:01:26,519 --> 00:01:28,384
that sets the tone
for the rest
of the household.

47
00:01:28,488 --> 00:01:30,581
Oh! Oh!

48
00:01:37,931 --> 00:01:39,330
Wow, you're up early.

49
00:01:39,399 --> 00:01:41,765
Is Miss Piggy co-hosting
the <i>Today</i> show?

50
00:01:41,835 --> 00:01:43,564
No, she karate-chopped
Savannah Guthrie

51
00:01:43,636 --> 00:01:45,103
and got banned
from set.

52
00:01:45,171 --> 00:01:46,729
Danny...

53
00:01:46,806 --> 00:01:50,105
Getting up early is an
essential part of being a
stay-at-home MILF.

54
00:01:50,577 --> 00:01:51,566
MILF.

55
00:01:52,378 --> 00:01:53,606
A Mom I Like To French?

56
00:01:54,447 --> 00:01:55,505
I like that.

57
00:01:55,582 --> 00:01:57,106
This is my new job.

58
00:01:57,183 --> 00:01:59,242
So I just need to
take the focus

59
00:01:59,319 --> 00:02:01,719
that I had in my
old job as a doctor

60
00:02:01,788 --> 00:02:03,119
and simply
apply it to this.

61
00:02:03,590 --> 00:02:06,616
For instance, my fiancé's
morning cup of coffee.

62
00:02:06,693 --> 00:02:07,682
Wow.

63
00:02:07,760 --> 00:02:09,751
And I found this really cool
mommy blog to help me.

64
00:02:09,829 --> 00:02:11,057
"Modern Mominista.

65
00:02:11,131 --> 00:02:13,429
"Living a fabulous life
one dirty diaper at a time."

66
00:02:13,600 --> 00:02:14,862
You can tell it's a
really classy site,

67
00:02:14,934 --> 00:02:16,595
because the banner ads
are for anti-depressants.

68
00:02:18,805 --> 00:02:19,897
Got a little something
in there.

69
00:02:19,973 --> 00:02:21,235
Oh, no,
you leave that in there.

70
00:02:21,307 --> 00:02:22,365
That's the coffee.

71
00:02:22,942 --> 00:02:23,931
You leave it in here?

72
00:02:24,177 --> 00:02:25,337
Do you not like it?

73
00:02:26,779 --> 00:02:27,768
I love it.

74
00:02:31,184 --> 00:02:33,709
Good morning,
Shulman & Associates!

75
00:02:33,786 --> 00:02:36,380
<i>And welcome
to your new intercom.</i>

76
00:02:36,456 --> 00:02:38,822
I noticed that our morning
meetings were becoming

77
00:02:38,892 --> 00:02:40,826
<i>interminable because</i>
<i>I couldn't seem</i>
<i>to get through</i>

78
00:02:40,894 --> 00:02:42,191
<i>a single sentence
without interruptions.</i>

79
00:02:42,262 --> 00:02:43,286
Dr. Reed...
Dr. Reed, this chair...

80
00:02:43,363 --> 00:02:44,523
I need a day off.
...hurts my butt cheeks.

81
00:02:44,597 --> 00:02:47,065
However, with this
new office-wide intercom,

82
00:02:47,133 --> 00:02:48,725
I never need to be
worried about being

83
00:02:48,801 --> 00:02:50,098
<i>interrupted ever...</i>

84
00:02:50,637 --> 00:02:51,831
Good morning,
ladies and gentlemen.

85
00:02:51,905 --> 00:02:53,236
I have a query.
And I warn you,

86
00:02:53,306 --> 00:02:54,773
it pertains to
matters of the heart.

87
00:02:54,841 --> 00:02:56,331
You have a crush on me.

88
00:02:56,409 --> 00:02:58,502
You're too old,
I'm sorry.

89
00:02:58,578 --> 00:03:00,102
Ah, don't tempt me,
Beverly.

90
00:03:00,180 --> 00:03:02,045
I have a hot-air
balloon ride
with your name on it.

91
00:03:02,115 --> 00:03:03,673
In that case,
pick me up at 6:00.

92
00:03:03,750 --> 00:03:04,739
I live in the alley.

93
00:03:04,817 --> 00:03:05,943
No.
This is about

94
00:03:06,019 --> 00:03:08,078
my sweet, darlin'
little baby sister, Colette.

95
00:03:08,588 --> 00:03:09,885
I need to find her
a man.

96
00:03:10,823 --> 00:03:11,812
A man?

97
00:03:12,325 --> 00:03:14,623
For what?
To spot her
at the gym?

98
00:03:14,694 --> 00:03:15,683
I could do that.

99
00:03:15,762 --> 00:03:17,161
No, a male suitor.

100
00:03:17,230 --> 00:03:18,663
Our grandfather's wedding
is coming up,

101
00:03:18,731 --> 00:03:20,358
and I don't want her to be
the only woman there

102
00:03:20,433 --> 00:03:21,695
without a dance partner,

103
00:03:21,768 --> 00:03:23,702
especially since
she is so graceful.

104
00:03:24,837 --> 00:03:26,065
Damn it!
Open up, you dick!

105
00:03:28,107 --> 00:03:31,474
So if y'all think of anyone
who might fit the bill,
I'd be greatly obliged.

106
00:03:31,544 --> 00:03:34,536
Oh, and for your information,
Jewish is fine.

107
00:03:36,983 --> 00:03:38,075
Hmm.

108
00:03:38,284 --> 00:03:40,013
Colette's gay, right?

109
00:03:40,086 --> 00:03:41,519
'Cause if not,
I'm taking back
the walking stick

110
00:03:41,588 --> 00:03:42,612
I got her
for her birthday.

111
00:03:42,689 --> 00:03:44,623
Oh, definitely.
I know gay
when I see it, okay?

112
00:03:44,691 --> 00:03:47,353
I was in prison
with Carson Kressley,

113
00:03:47,427 --> 00:03:48,917
who's a great guy
and totally changed

114
00:03:48,995 --> 00:03:50,087
my sense of fashion.
Look at that.

115
00:03:50,163 --> 00:03:52,222
Okay, guys.
Let's stop gossiping
about this.

116
00:03:52,498 --> 00:03:53,692
If Colette
wants to come out,

117
00:03:53,766 --> 00:03:55,859
let's let her do it
in her own way.

118
00:03:55,935 --> 00:03:57,527
Richie came out
during his tumbling routine

119
00:03:57,604 --> 00:03:58,832
at the high school
talent show.

120
00:03:59,872 --> 00:04:01,533
Brought down the house.

121
00:04:01,608 --> 00:04:02,939
<i>And that is our new</i>

122
00:04:03,009 --> 00:04:05,068
<i>forty-digit Wi-Fi password.</i>

123
00:04:05,144 --> 00:04:07,874
<i>For security reasons,
I will never repeat it again.</i>

124
00:04:07,947 --> 00:04:09,778
Come on, man!
Dang, man!

125
00:04:09,849 --> 00:04:12,079
Leo, you better
hold onto your pacifier,

126
00:04:12,151 --> 00:04:16,019
because your mom
is about to transform
into a Modern Mominista.

127
00:04:16,189 --> 00:04:17,178
<i>Step number one.</i>

128
00:04:17,257 --> 00:04:18,884
<i>Take pride
in your appearance.</i>

129
00:04:18,958 --> 00:04:22,155
<i>Dress every day like</i>
<i>you're on a date with</i>
<i>your special little guy.</i>

130
00:04:22,228 --> 00:04:23,456
Dress nice?

131
00:04:23,529 --> 00:04:24,894
Bitch, you don't even
need to ask.

132
00:04:24,964 --> 00:04:26,693
<i>Two,</i>
<i>take advantage</i>
<i>of the baby's nap</i>

133
00:04:26,766 --> 00:04:28,028
<i>to clean up the house.</i>

134
00:04:28,101 --> 00:04:30,331
<i>But don't use the vacuum.
That'll wake him up.</i>

135
00:04:30,403 --> 00:04:32,701
<i>Hand-clean the floor
with all-organic products.</i>

136
00:04:32,772 --> 00:04:34,569
Hand clean?

137
00:04:34,641 --> 00:04:36,939
I've never gotten
on my knees and not gotten
jewelry out of it.

138
00:04:45,351 --> 00:04:46,340
<i>Step number one.</i>

139
00:04:46,419 --> 00:04:47,943
<i>Take pride
in your appearance.</i>

140
00:04:48,021 --> 00:04:51,422
<i>Dress every day like</i>
<i>you're on a date with</i>
<i>your special little guy.</i>

141
00:04:53,359 --> 00:04:55,190
Okay, back on track.

142
00:04:55,261 --> 00:04:56,592
What's next?

143
00:04:56,663 --> 00:04:58,654
<i>By now you should be
back from your five-mile run</i>

144
00:04:58,731 --> 00:05:00,858
<i>and your duck should be ready
to come out of the oven.</i>

145
00:05:00,933 --> 00:05:02,560
What duck? What run?

146
00:05:03,002 --> 00:05:04,128
Oh, screw you!

147
00:05:17,183 --> 00:05:18,445
Ho!

148
00:05:19,152 --> 00:05:20,141
Ow!

149
00:05:23,356 --> 00:05:25,756
Hey, Morgan,
I need to talk to you.

150
00:05:25,825 --> 00:05:26,951
Uh...

151
00:05:27,026 --> 00:05:28,459
You know
I'm gay, right?

152
00:05:28,928 --> 00:05:30,953
Yeah, I had
a pretty good idea.

153
00:05:31,030 --> 00:05:33,658
I mean, your Pinterest
is all pictures of steaks
you want to cook.

154
00:05:33,733 --> 00:05:34,757
I made it my homepage.

155
00:05:34,834 --> 00:05:36,631
My brother doesn't know
that I'm gay

156
00:05:36,703 --> 00:05:37,931
and I'm not going
to tell him

157
00:05:38,004 --> 00:05:40,131
because the dude
is old-fashioned.

158
00:05:40,206 --> 00:05:43,266
I'm talking, he's got
a bullet in his shoulder
from a duel.

159
00:05:43,343 --> 00:05:45,072
So you never tried
to tell him?

160
00:05:45,144 --> 00:05:46,372
It's easier this way.

161
00:05:46,446 --> 00:05:47,879
Just to pretend like
it doesn't exist.

162
00:05:47,947 --> 00:05:51,041
But the problem now
is that he's trying
to find me a wedding date.

163
00:05:51,117 --> 00:05:52,778
So...

164
00:05:52,852 --> 00:05:55,946
I wanted to see
if you would
play my boyfriend.

165
00:05:56,022 --> 00:05:57,512
Just till this blows over.

166
00:05:57,590 --> 00:05:58,750
And then that's it.

167
00:05:59,125 --> 00:06:00,114
You asking me out?

168
00:06:00,393 --> 00:06:02,293
Yes, but as pretend,
so don't get...

169
00:06:04,664 --> 00:06:06,325
This is my first ask-out.
Really?

170
00:06:06,399 --> 00:06:09,232
Congratulations,
because you got yourself
a boyfriend.

171
00:06:09,302 --> 00:06:11,566
Oh! All right! Yes!
Mmm.

172
00:06:11,637 --> 00:06:12,626
No!

173
00:06:13,373 --> 00:06:15,898
<i>After a long day of being</i>
<i>a Modern Mominista,</i>

174
00:06:15,975 --> 00:06:18,944
<i>there's no better reward</i>
<i>than your hubby's</i>
<i>appreciation.</i>

175
00:06:19,011 --> 00:06:20,478
Welcome,
my beautiful breadwinner.

176
00:06:20,546 --> 00:06:21,979
Hey.

177
00:06:22,048 --> 00:06:23,709
Wow. Place looks great.

178
00:06:23,783 --> 00:06:24,772
Doesn't it?

179
00:06:24,851 --> 00:06:27,012
Yeah.
Oh, no, no,
no, no, no.

180
00:06:27,086 --> 00:06:28,485
Let me, my prince.

181
00:06:29,355 --> 00:06:30,652
Thank you.
Yeah.

182
00:06:30,723 --> 00:06:31,951
The baby's asleep.

183
00:06:32,024 --> 00:06:36,222
The house has been
spotlessly cleaned with
useless organic products.

184
00:06:36,295 --> 00:06:37,887
And for dinner...

185
00:06:37,964 --> 00:06:40,797
The American classic,
grilled cheese
and tomato soup.

186
00:06:41,868 --> 00:06:43,426
Wow, that sounds great,
babe.

187
00:06:43,503 --> 00:06:45,300
Bon appétit.
Thank you.

188
00:06:46,606 --> 00:06:48,267
<i>Give it to me
I'm worth it, etc</i>

189
00:06:49,876 --> 00:06:51,070
Whoa, babe!

190
00:06:51,144 --> 00:06:52,668
That's great.
Thank you.

191
00:06:53,646 --> 00:06:54,704
Bye, honey.

192
00:06:58,000 --> 00:07:02,000
<b><font color="#0E7521">Ripped & Corrected By mstoll</font></b>

193
00:07:28,014 --> 00:07:29,106
Ah, you! Come here.

194
00:07:29,182 --> 00:07:30,308
Ow!

195
00:07:30,383 --> 00:07:32,578
Oh! Oh!

196
00:07:32,652 --> 00:07:33,880
Oh! Mmm.

197
00:07:35,354 --> 00:07:36,548
Hey, babe.

198
00:07:36,622 --> 00:07:37,611
Hey, sweetie.

199
00:07:38,324 --> 00:07:39,313
Dinner's ready.

200
00:07:39,425 --> 00:07:42,417
And I made us something
very special for TGIF.

201
00:07:43,796 --> 00:07:47,323
Queso panini and
my take on hot gazpacho.

202
00:07:47,400 --> 00:07:48,697
Grilled cheese
and tomato soup.

203
00:07:49,569 --> 00:07:51,503
I mean, I guess
you could call it that.

204
00:07:51,571 --> 00:07:53,095
Oh, thanks.
But you know what?

205
00:07:53,172 --> 00:07:55,436
I, uh... I picked up
something on the way home.

206
00:07:55,508 --> 00:07:56,634
So I'm all good.

207
00:07:57,643 --> 00:07:59,372
Is there something wrong
with my home-cooked meal?

208
00:07:59,445 --> 00:08:00,571
No, absolutely not.

209
00:08:00,646 --> 00:08:03,444
No, it's just
you mastered
grilled cheese,

210
00:08:03,516 --> 00:08:07,452
maybe it's time to,
you know, try cooking
something else.

211
00:08:07,520 --> 00:08:09,613
Sure. You know,
I'll just take
cooking classes

212
00:08:09,689 --> 00:08:12,886
at the Manhattan Institute
for Women with
Infinite Time.

213
00:08:13,125 --> 00:08:15,992
Okay, just...
Just forget I said that.

214
00:08:16,062 --> 00:08:17,086
Why don't you cool off?

215
00:08:17,163 --> 00:08:18,892
And while you do that,
I'll hit the gym.

216
00:08:19,465 --> 00:08:20,454
You know what?

217
00:08:20,533 --> 00:08:22,467
Why don't you stay here
and look after Leo

218
00:08:22,535 --> 00:08:23,593
and I go out for a while.

219
00:08:23,669 --> 00:08:25,500
I haven't been outside
since I took our trash
to the river.

220
00:08:25,571 --> 00:08:27,937
It's just...
I was hoping
to take a break.

221
00:08:28,007 --> 00:08:30,373
I mean, I worked all day.

222
00:08:30,443 --> 00:08:32,809
Yeah, I also
worked all day and I would
also love a break.

223
00:08:32,879 --> 00:08:34,346
But your job is fun.

224
00:08:34,947 --> 00:08:36,881
I'm jealous you get to
hang out all day

225
00:08:36,949 --> 00:08:38,348
with the coolest
little guy around.

226
00:08:38,417 --> 00:08:39,714
Hang out all day?

227
00:08:39,785 --> 00:08:41,946
Yeah.
You think this is
a vacation?

228
00:08:42,688 --> 00:08:45,589
You think
I'm laying on the beach
tits-deep in a margarita?

229
00:08:46,158 --> 00:08:47,284
If you think
this is so easy, Danny,

230
00:08:47,360 --> 00:08:48,349
then why don't
you try it?

231
00:08:48,427 --> 00:08:49,416
You would die.

232
00:08:49,495 --> 00:08:50,723
I don't think so.

233
00:08:50,796 --> 00:08:52,024
I think I'd be
pretty good at it.

234
00:08:52,098 --> 00:08:53,360
Oh, really?
Yeah.

235
00:08:53,432 --> 00:08:54,865
Well, then
you got a deal, bud.

236
00:08:54,934 --> 00:08:56,128
On Monday,
I'm going to go to work

237
00:08:56,202 --> 00:08:57,191
and you can stay at home.

238
00:08:57,270 --> 00:08:58,737
Great, sounds like
a lot of fun.

239
00:08:58,804 --> 00:09:00,396
You can call me
Stay-At-Home Dan.

240
00:09:00,473 --> 00:09:02,441
I will, because
it sounds pretty stupid.

241
00:09:02,775 --> 00:09:05,005
Now if you'll excuse me,
I am going to go to the gym

242
00:09:05,077 --> 00:09:06,339
while you take care
of our son.

243
00:09:07,313 --> 00:09:08,644
Good.

244
00:09:08,714 --> 00:09:10,272
Damn it.
Now I have to go to the gym.

245
00:09:13,386 --> 00:09:15,980
Okay, stay-at-home daddy,
I am off to work,

246
00:09:16,055 --> 00:09:17,317
so where's my break...

247
00:09:17,657 --> 00:09:18,646
...fast?

248
00:09:20,693 --> 00:09:22,058
French toast, <i>mon amour?</i>

249
00:09:26,933 --> 00:09:28,366
Damn it, this is
restaurant-quality.

250
00:09:28,434 --> 00:09:30,265
You know, it helps
if the brioche is fresh,

251
00:09:30,336 --> 00:09:32,770
so I stopped at the bakery
on the way back from my run.

252
00:09:33,239 --> 00:09:34,365
You already went on a run?

253
00:09:34,440 --> 00:09:35,429
Yeah, you were half asleep.

254
00:09:35,508 --> 00:09:37,373
You mumbled something
about Taylor Swift

255
00:09:37,443 --> 00:09:38,705
and then you rolled over
and farted.

256
00:09:39,145 --> 00:09:41,978
Your poached eggs
should be ready
in three, two, one.

257
00:09:43,549 --> 00:09:44,675
There we go.

258
00:09:50,523 --> 00:09:51,581
Congratulations, everyone.

259
00:09:51,657 --> 00:09:52,988
Your prayers
have been answered,

260
00:09:53,059 --> 00:09:54,048
because Mindy Lahiri...

261
00:09:54,126 --> 00:09:55,354
Ow!

262
00:09:55,595 --> 00:09:58,223
What the hell, dude?
I am so sorry.

263
00:09:58,297 --> 00:10:00,026
It's just... It's...
It's lunchtime pigskin.

264
00:10:00,099 --> 00:10:01,088
Lunchtime pigskin.

265
00:10:01,167 --> 00:10:02,361
God!
Sorry.

266
00:10:02,668 --> 00:10:03,726
Morgan and I were
just practicing

267
00:10:03,803 --> 00:10:05,430
for our family's weekend
touch football game.

268
00:10:05,504 --> 00:10:07,233
- Ho!
- Huh?

269
00:10:07,306 --> 00:10:08,568
Why would you
be invited to that?

270
00:10:09,709 --> 00:10:12,143
No, you're not hunting him
for sport, are you?

271
00:10:12,211 --> 00:10:14,008
No, we don't
do that anymore.

272
00:10:15,181 --> 00:10:17,342
Morgan's invited because
he's Colette's new boyfriend.

273
00:10:17,550 --> 00:10:18,847
What?
Oh, yeah.

274
00:10:18,918 --> 00:10:19,907
There's my girl.

275
00:10:19,986 --> 00:10:21,044
What!

276
00:10:21,120 --> 00:10:24,317
Get this...
Everyone's calling us
Col-organ, which I hate.

277
00:10:24,390 --> 00:10:25,482
Guys, please.

278
00:10:25,558 --> 00:10:28,459
Yes!
I love men.

279
00:10:28,527 --> 00:10:31,189
I love being in
this relationship.
Mmm.

280
00:10:31,764 --> 00:10:34,528
What a hot
and natural couple.
Isn't it?

281
00:10:34,734 --> 00:10:36,167
Morgan is
a fine young man.

282
00:10:36,235 --> 00:10:37,327
We're going golfing later.

283
00:10:37,403 --> 00:10:39,200
Uh, by "golf," you mean
the Frisbee variety?

284
00:10:39,271 --> 00:10:41,762
Morgan, you are a panic.

285
00:10:41,841 --> 00:10:43,103
I love it.
I know!

286
00:10:43,175 --> 00:10:44,267
- Oh!
- Catch!

287
00:10:44,343 --> 00:10:46,334
Come on, shnookums.
This is my boyfriend.

288
00:10:47,079 --> 00:10:49,479
Excuse me, but,
uh, would you mind if I ask,

289
00:10:49,548 --> 00:10:50,640
what are you
doing back here?

290
00:10:51,117 --> 00:10:52,311
What am I doing here?
Yeah.

291
00:10:52,385 --> 00:10:53,511
That's like
asking Rihanna

292
00:10:53,586 --> 00:10:54,712
what she's doing
at the Met Ball.

293
00:10:54,787 --> 00:10:55,776
I'm the queen of this ish.

294
00:10:55,988 --> 00:10:58,081
But if you must know,

295
00:10:58,190 --> 00:10:59,418
Danny's taking care
of our baby

296
00:10:59,492 --> 00:11:01,483
and I am covering
his workload.

297
00:11:01,594 --> 00:11:03,152
So the hysterectomy
I was going to do with Danny,

298
00:11:03,229 --> 00:11:04,321
now I'm doing it with you?

299
00:11:04,397 --> 00:11:05,625
Yeah, man! Yeah.

300
00:11:05,698 --> 00:11:06,687
You bet your
sweet ass you are.

301
00:11:06,799 --> 00:11:07,788
And we're going to
listen to my playlist.

302
00:11:07,867 --> 00:11:09,835
So I hope you like
<i>Monster Mash</i>
and Tracy Chapman.

303
00:11:10,436 --> 00:11:11,960
God!

304
00:11:12,038 --> 00:11:13,164
I'm so sorry.

305
00:11:14,306 --> 00:11:15,295
<i>Well, Leo...</i>

306
00:11:15,374 --> 00:11:16,841
Today's going to be
easy as pie.

307
00:11:16,909 --> 00:11:17,967
Speaking of which...

308
00:11:20,880 --> 00:11:22,814
Yeah.

309
00:11:22,882 --> 00:11:24,440
Yeah, it looks good, right?

310
00:11:24,517 --> 00:11:26,985
Okay, let me cross that
off the to-do list.

311
00:11:27,053 --> 00:11:29,078
Bake apple pie.
We're right on schedule.

312
00:11:29,255 --> 00:11:30,415
We'll go to the
pediatrician early,

313
00:11:30,489 --> 00:11:32,753
we'll still have time to work
on our Italian flashcards.

314
00:11:32,825 --> 00:11:33,814
What's next?

315
00:11:33,893 --> 00:11:35,485
Cable guy's five minutes late.
That's okay, right?

316
00:11:35,561 --> 00:11:36,892
That's why you schedule
wiggle room.

317
00:11:38,197 --> 00:11:39,186
Oh. Whoop!

318
00:11:39,265 --> 00:11:40,425
Rattle down.
I'll get it.

319
00:11:42,301 --> 00:11:43,325
Oh, damn it.

320
00:11:43,402 --> 00:11:44,460
Um...

321
00:11:45,104 --> 00:11:46,264
Okay.
That's okay.

322
00:11:46,338 --> 00:11:47,327
No worries.

323
00:11:47,940 --> 00:11:50,500
That's why you always
bake a second pie.

324
00:11:51,310 --> 00:11:52,368
Hey!

325
00:11:52,445 --> 00:11:53,434
Hey, man!

326
00:11:53,512 --> 00:11:54,604
What the hell are you
doing with Colette?

327
00:11:54,747 --> 00:11:55,771
We're dating
and we're in love!

328
00:11:56,148 --> 00:11:57,911
Okay, that's
obviously not true.

329
00:11:57,983 --> 00:12:00,850
Morgan, you cannot turn
gay people straight.

330
00:12:00,920 --> 00:12:02,410
I know, I know.
Listen, listen. Okay.

331
00:12:02,488 --> 00:12:04,718
Colette asked me to
be the beard at her
grandfather's wedding.

332
00:12:04,790 --> 00:12:06,758
But now Dr. K is
treating me like family.

333
00:12:06,826 --> 00:12:08,293
He took me on his boat!

334
00:12:08,360 --> 00:12:10,328
No one has ever done that
and brought me back.

335
00:12:10,396 --> 00:12:13,263
You cannot keep a
Southern family's gay secret
for personal gain.

336
00:12:13,332 --> 00:12:15,027
What are you, in a
Tennessee Williams play?

337
00:12:15,801 --> 00:12:16,893
Whoa, am I smart?

338
00:12:17,470 --> 00:12:18,835
You shouldn't help
Colette lie.

339
00:12:18,904 --> 00:12:21,464
And this is coming from
someone who loves to lie.

340
00:12:21,540 --> 00:12:23,440
I need more time.
Jody's teaching me
how to play the spoons.

341
00:12:23,509 --> 00:12:24,635
Look at this. Ready?

342
00:12:25,244 --> 00:12:26,677
<i>Got a woman in...</i>

343
00:12:28,114 --> 00:12:29,706
It happens seven or
eight times a day,

344
00:12:29,782 --> 00:12:31,079
and, frankly,
I'm getting sick of it.

345
00:12:31,150 --> 00:12:33,277
<i>Attention, y'all, this</i>
<i>message is for Morgan.</i>

346
00:12:33,352 --> 00:12:35,149
<i>I'm not going to finish
my chicken pot pie.</i>

347
00:12:35,221 --> 00:12:38,213
<i>Please make your way to</i>
<i>the kitchen if you would like</i>
<i>some leftover gravy and peas.</i>

348
00:12:38,290 --> 00:12:40,520
Did you hear that?
It's my favorite food, scraps!

349
00:12:40,593 --> 00:12:42,993
I need this.
Please? Great.
Okay.

350
00:12:43,062 --> 00:12:45,428
<i>Please refrain</i>
<i>from using the intercom</i>

351
00:12:45,498 --> 00:12:47,489
<i>for announcements
about chicken pot pie.</i>

352
00:12:47,867 --> 00:12:49,528
My son's late for a
doctor's appointment.

353
00:12:49,602 --> 00:12:50,933
So how long's it going to be?

354
00:12:52,138 --> 00:12:54,766
What? What do you mean,
"What's a guy doing home
at 2:00 p.m."?

355
00:12:54,840 --> 00:12:56,933
I'll tell you what
I'm doing home.
I'm a stay-at-home dad!

356
00:12:57,009 --> 00:12:58,271
That's okay now.

357
00:12:59,578 --> 00:13:00,943
No, you're getting heated!

358
00:13:01,680 --> 00:13:03,238
He hung up on me.

359
00:13:03,315 --> 00:13:04,748
Cable company hung up on me.

360
00:13:05,151 --> 00:13:07,210
Uh... Ow!

361
00:13:07,286 --> 00:13:08,344
God!

362
00:13:08,420 --> 00:13:09,580
God damn it.

363
00:13:12,525 --> 00:13:13,787
Okay.

364
00:13:13,859 --> 00:13:15,156
Okay.

365
00:13:16,762 --> 00:13:17,751
Oh, it's Mommy.

366
00:13:29,008 --> 00:13:31,238
<i>I was working in the lab
late one night, etc</i>

367
00:13:38,050 --> 00:13:39,711
That was a great surgery!

368
00:13:39,785 --> 00:13:41,650
I forgot how much I like
slicing open women.

369
00:13:42,321 --> 00:13:43,583
Thank God I became a doctor.

370
00:13:43,656 --> 00:13:47,183
After that...
I think we deserve a treat.

371
00:13:48,661 --> 00:13:49,753
Whoa.

372
00:13:49,829 --> 00:13:51,262
The flask?

373
00:13:51,330 --> 00:13:53,491
Mine was confiscated at
the American Girl store.

374
00:13:53,566 --> 00:13:54,555
What is this?
Mike's Hard?

375
00:13:54,633 --> 00:13:56,328
Oh, that's craft whiskey.

376
00:13:56,402 --> 00:13:57,926
The field of rye was
fertilized only by

377
00:13:58,003 --> 00:13:59,493
the leavings of
Kentucky Derby winners.

378
00:13:59,839 --> 00:14:02,433
So fancy and gross.

379
00:14:02,508 --> 00:14:03,634
What are we drinking to?

380
00:14:03,909 --> 00:14:05,740
How about your
last day of work?

381
00:14:07,246 --> 00:14:08,508
I can't believe
I'm saying this.

382
00:14:09,348 --> 00:14:12,647
I'm sorry you won't be there
tomorrow to assist in
my triplet delivery.

383
00:14:12,718 --> 00:14:15,516
Yeah, I need to be
at home with my son.

384
00:14:15,588 --> 00:14:16,885
You know, Danny's right.

385
00:14:16,956 --> 00:14:19,652
A child needs his
doctor mother to be home
to clean the floors

386
00:14:19,725 --> 00:14:21,659
and to prepare the
father gourmet food.

387
00:14:21,727 --> 00:14:23,592
And that's what
I want to be doing, so...

388
00:14:23,929 --> 00:14:25,362
Sounds like
you need another sip.

389
00:14:25,931 --> 00:14:28,422
Uh, nope,
you already drank it all.

390
00:14:28,534 --> 00:14:29,523
Yeah.

391
00:14:31,904 --> 00:14:33,132
Come in.

392
00:14:33,639 --> 00:14:35,766
Oh, good.
You're still here.
I thought you were gone.

393
00:14:35,841 --> 00:14:37,240
No, no, no, no.
I'm still here.

394
00:14:37,309 --> 00:14:38,867
I'm still a working-mom
until the end of the day.

395
00:14:38,944 --> 00:14:42,209
Good, because I need
something feminine to wear
to my grandpa's wedding.

396
00:14:42,281 --> 00:14:44,749
This is the
only dress I own.

397
00:14:44,817 --> 00:14:46,808
It was from
my first communion.

398
00:14:46,886 --> 00:14:48,979
Colette, we need to talk.
Sit down.

399
00:14:49,922 --> 00:14:51,822
You have to tell
your brother the truth.

400
00:14:51,891 --> 00:14:53,358
If you are not living
your authentic self,

401
00:14:53,425 --> 00:14:54,858
what even was
the point of <i>Glee?</i>

402
00:14:54,927 --> 00:14:57,054
Well, the problem's Jody.
I just...

403
00:14:57,129 --> 00:14:59,723
I love him so much, I...
I want to be the...

404
00:14:59,798 --> 00:15:02,130
The girly-girl he's always
wanted me to be.

405
00:15:02,201 --> 00:15:03,862
Even if that means
I have to lie.

406
00:15:03,936 --> 00:15:04,925
Forever.

407
00:15:05,104 --> 00:15:07,163
You shouldn't hide who you are
from someone you love.

408
00:15:10,576 --> 00:15:12,373
Oh, my God.

409
00:15:12,444 --> 00:15:13,741
I'm in the closet, too.

410
00:15:13,812 --> 00:15:15,837
Definitely not.
Like, hard no.

411
00:15:15,915 --> 00:15:17,507
Not even close.

412
00:15:17,583 --> 00:15:19,813
Yes, but I'm keeping a secret
from a man that I love.

413
00:15:20,452 --> 00:15:21,817
I'll tell you a secret.

414
00:15:21,887 --> 00:15:23,684
I don't want to be a
stay-at-home mom.

415
00:15:23,756 --> 00:15:25,087
I want to come to work.
I just...

416
00:15:25,157 --> 00:15:26,419
I don't know
how to tell Danny.

417
00:15:26,492 --> 00:15:28,585
Well, if he loves you
he'll understand.

418
00:15:31,964 --> 00:15:34,432
I guess I got to tell
Jody the truth, too.

419
00:15:34,500 --> 00:15:36,627
I just got to find a
way to tell him delicately.

420
00:15:37,770 --> 00:15:38,998
Hey, boo.

421
00:15:39,538 --> 00:15:41,233
Jody is starting to
get suspicious.

422
00:15:41,307 --> 00:15:43,332
So you and I have to
start openly kissing

423
00:15:43,409 --> 00:15:45,001
and maybe get a
little grabsy.
Oh, God! No!

424
00:15:45,077 --> 00:15:46,806
No! Ugh.

425
00:15:47,179 --> 00:15:48,441
Oh, God.

426
00:15:48,647 --> 00:15:50,171
Hey, everybody.

427
00:15:50,282 --> 00:15:51,408
It's Colette.

428
00:15:51,483 --> 00:15:53,576
I'm a lesbian.
Over and out.

429
00:15:54,553 --> 00:15:55,577
I'm proud of you.

430
00:15:55,654 --> 00:15:57,417
I feel so good!

431
00:15:57,623 --> 00:15:59,113
<i>Colette!</i>

432
00:15:59,191 --> 00:16:01,489
<i>No!</i>

433
00:16:06,265 --> 00:16:07,960
Colette, you're
not really gay, are you?

434
00:16:08,534 --> 00:16:10,297
I mean, this is just
another one of your
funny pranks, right?

435
00:16:10,369 --> 00:16:11,996
Like when you kissed
that girl in your class?

436
00:16:12,071 --> 00:16:13,504
Or asked that girl to prom?

437
00:16:14,506 --> 00:16:15,973
Oh, dear.

438
00:16:16,041 --> 00:16:17,303
It's not a prank, Jody.

439
00:16:17,376 --> 00:16:19,071
Listen, she's not gay.
Relax, okay?

440
00:16:19,144 --> 00:16:21,169
This is just a ruse
so I will propose to her

441
00:16:21,246 --> 00:16:22,736
and it's working.
Colette, I love you.

442
00:16:22,815 --> 00:16:23,839
No, get up. Get up.
I just need a minute.

443
00:16:23,916 --> 00:16:25,110
This is all so shocking.
Really?

444
00:16:25,184 --> 00:16:27,482
Every Halloween
I went as John Elway.

445
00:16:27,586 --> 00:16:28,814
It's not that you're gay.

446
00:16:28,887 --> 00:16:30,252
I've known plenty of gays.

447
00:16:30,322 --> 00:16:31,687
Heck, half the guys in
boarding school were

448
00:16:31,757 --> 00:16:32,849
messing around
with each other.

449
00:16:32,925 --> 00:16:33,983
Amen, sister.

450
00:16:34,626 --> 00:16:35,991
Wait, then
why are you so upset?

451
00:16:36,061 --> 00:16:37,494
Because I love you, Colette.

452
00:16:37,629 --> 00:16:39,563
And now your life
isn't going to be the
one I pictured for you.

453
00:16:39,631 --> 00:16:40,723
And neither will mine.

454
00:16:40,799 --> 00:16:42,494
I mean, now
I'll never have a
brother-in-law.

455
00:16:42,601 --> 00:16:44,125
We were going to
grill together,

456
00:16:44,203 --> 00:16:45,329
complain about our wives.

457
00:16:45,404 --> 00:16:47,770
Jody, don't you get it?

458
00:16:47,840 --> 00:16:49,467
I'm going to be
that brother-in-law!

459
00:16:49,541 --> 00:16:50,565
What do you mean?

460
00:16:50,642 --> 00:16:52,473
I like dumb blondes
just like you do.

461
00:16:52,544 --> 00:16:55,570
I mean, we're both going
to marry hot trophy wives
who love to shop.

462
00:16:55,814 --> 00:16:56,906
With really big breasts?

463
00:16:56,982 --> 00:16:58,006
The biggest!

464
00:16:58,083 --> 00:16:59,573
This coming-out is
getting less touching.

465
00:16:59,651 --> 00:17:01,278
And who do you think's
going to sit on the bench

466
00:17:01,353 --> 00:17:03,287
at the mall
holding their purses?

467
00:17:03,355 --> 00:17:05,016
Me and you?
Damn right.

468
00:17:05,090 --> 00:17:06,489
Come here.

469
00:17:07,860 --> 00:17:10,158
Okay.

470
00:17:10,229 --> 00:17:13,027
Thanks, Dr. Lahiri,
for the advice.

471
00:17:13,098 --> 00:17:15,066
I'm really glad
I said how I feel.

472
00:17:16,235 --> 00:17:20,262
I don't care if you're gay
or straight or trans.

473
00:17:20,939 --> 00:17:23,464
I'm in love with you
and all that matters is
that you are my girlfriend.

474
00:17:23,542 --> 00:17:24,531
No.

475
00:17:24,610 --> 00:17:25,599
- Could've been the best.
- No.

476
00:17:25,677 --> 00:17:26,701
You could've had the best.

477
00:17:26,779 --> 00:17:28,269
Hey, sweetheart.

478
00:17:28,347 --> 00:17:29,336
Don't worry.

479
00:17:29,415 --> 00:17:30,814
I had a hard first day, too.

480
00:17:33,118 --> 00:17:34,107
Hey, babe.

481
00:17:35,521 --> 00:17:36,715
Oh, my God.
Are you painting?

482
00:17:37,089 --> 00:17:39,489
Yeah, it's just watercolors.

483
00:17:39,558 --> 00:17:40,616
Relaxes me.

484
00:17:42,528 --> 00:17:43,620
This place looks amazing.

485
00:17:43,695 --> 00:17:45,526
Ah, I don't know
if it looks amazing.

486
00:17:45,597 --> 00:17:47,462
I almost didn't get to
wax the floor, because

487
00:17:47,533 --> 00:17:48,693
I was glazing the duck.

488
00:17:49,168 --> 00:17:52,035
Somehow, I miraculously
managed to do both.

489
00:17:52,271 --> 00:17:53,260
You did both?

490
00:17:53,338 --> 00:17:54,464
Hey, have a seat.

491
00:17:58,877 --> 00:18:00,742
I'm going to wash up
and we'll say grace, okay?

492
00:18:00,813 --> 00:18:01,905
Okay.

493
00:18:06,785 --> 00:18:09,515
Hey, Leo, we need to talk.

494
00:18:09,588 --> 00:18:11,886
Thing is,
genetically speaking,

495
00:18:11,957 --> 00:18:14,790
you're half your dad
and half me.

496
00:18:14,860 --> 00:18:17,055
Which is mostly a
good thing...

497
00:18:17,129 --> 00:18:21,122
You'll probably inherit your
dad's hair and my ability to
remember slights.

498
00:18:21,400 --> 00:18:22,833
And I really hope you inherit

499
00:18:22,901 --> 00:18:25,369
your dad's ability to be
great at everything he tries.

500
00:18:26,505 --> 00:18:28,132
But you might be like me,

501
00:18:28,207 --> 00:18:31,973
and I'm only great
at one thing, my job.

502
00:18:33,378 --> 00:18:35,403
God, you should've
seen me in the surgery today.

503
00:18:35,481 --> 00:18:37,779
Even Karen
the anesthesiologist
gave me a high-five,

504
00:18:37,850 --> 00:18:39,249
and I've told you
what a bitch she is.

505
00:18:40,719 --> 00:18:42,619
I just want you to be
proud of me, baby.

506
00:18:45,324 --> 00:18:47,417
Which is why I have to
go back to work.

507
00:18:47,493 --> 00:18:50,394
I just don't know
how to tell your dad yet.

508
00:18:55,367 --> 00:18:57,164
Wait a second.

509
00:18:57,236 --> 00:18:59,704
That's a hotel-quality
bed corner!

510
00:19:01,840 --> 00:19:03,865
It's so tidy in there.

511
00:19:04,309 --> 00:19:05,435
Oh, thanks.

512
00:19:05,511 --> 00:19:08,105
Well, you know what
I liked the most...

513
00:19:08,180 --> 00:19:09,442
Was this towel swan.

514
00:19:09,548 --> 00:19:10,537
What?

515
00:19:10,616 --> 00:19:12,015
This towel swan
that you made.

516
00:19:12,084 --> 00:19:13,346
The swan I made
out of a towel.

517
00:19:13,418 --> 00:19:14,817
It's funny
because I remember

518
00:19:14,887 --> 00:19:18,653
you telling me that
origami was disrespectful
to Pearl Harbor vets.

519
00:19:18,724 --> 00:19:20,954
Oh, no, no, no.
I changed my mind
on that whole theory.

520
00:19:21,026 --> 00:19:22,584
Well, since
I'm going to be home
tomorrow,

521
00:19:22,661 --> 00:19:25,186
thought maybe you could,
uh, show me how you did it.

522
00:19:26,098 --> 00:19:27,087
The towel swan?

523
00:19:27,166 --> 00:19:28,155
Yeah.

524
00:19:28,233 --> 00:19:30,497
Let's see, that's...
Oh, yeah, that's...

525
00:19:30,569 --> 00:19:32,867
Once over there
and then we, uh...

526
00:19:33,272 --> 00:19:34,398
Mmm.
These towels are a little

527
00:19:34,473 --> 00:19:36,134
starchy right now, but, uh...

528
00:19:37,309 --> 00:19:39,038
No, that doesn't
look like a swan.

529
00:19:39,945 --> 00:19:42,140
Cross over and then we, uh...

530
00:19:43,115 --> 00:19:44,104
What's that?

531
00:19:44,183 --> 00:19:45,616
The gun in <i>The Godfather.</i>

532
00:19:45,684 --> 00:19:46,810
That sucks.
Give that to me.

533
00:19:46,885 --> 00:19:47,874
Here.

534
00:19:48,587 --> 00:19:50,214
I cannot believe you!
What?

535
00:19:50,289 --> 00:19:52,814
You brought your mother
in as a ringer to
make me look bad.

536
00:19:52,891 --> 00:19:54,518
Fine.
I had help, okay?

537
00:19:54,593 --> 00:19:56,458
But it wasn't to
make you look bad, it was...

538
00:19:58,163 --> 00:19:59,630
It was because you were right.

539
00:19:59,698 --> 00:20:01,632
My schedule was
in shreds by 12:00.

540
00:20:01,700 --> 00:20:03,725
I called Ma crying, okay?

541
00:20:03,869 --> 00:20:04,927
I couldn't do it.

542
00:20:06,471 --> 00:20:07,495
It's hard.

543
00:20:07,573 --> 00:20:08,904
It's really hard.

544
00:20:09,408 --> 00:20:12,172
I wasn't lying, like
my allergy to vegetables.

545
00:20:12,244 --> 00:20:13,506
I don't know how you do it.

546
00:20:13,579 --> 00:20:15,843
I changed my shirt,
like, four times.

547
00:20:16,582 --> 00:20:18,209
He just... He saw a
new shirt come
and he was like...

548
00:20:18,283 --> 00:20:20,114
Yeah. Big challenge.

549
00:20:20,319 --> 00:20:22,719
Did he do that thing
where he's clearly crying

550
00:20:22,821 --> 00:20:24,311
but there's no sound
coming out? He's like...

551
00:20:26,391 --> 00:20:27,756
Yeah, that's exactly
what he does.

552
00:20:27,826 --> 00:20:29,453
By the way, we're switching
to those diapers

553
00:20:29,528 --> 00:20:30,722
that are bad for
the environment.

554
00:20:30,963 --> 00:20:32,931
I've already been
using them, actually.

555
00:20:32,998 --> 00:20:34,465
I keep them in the
ceiling with my candy.

556
00:20:34,733 --> 00:20:35,893
I'm a lucky guy.

557
00:20:36,301 --> 00:20:38,997
I'm with someone that actually
wants to do this every day.

558
00:20:40,005 --> 00:20:41,233
I have to talk to you
about something.

559
00:20:41,440 --> 00:20:42,429
What's up?

560
00:20:42,741 --> 00:20:44,208
I haven't been...

561
00:20:44,276 --> 00:20:46,141
Sorry. Hold on a second.

562
00:20:47,346 --> 00:20:50,042
Hey, Little Danny.
How's my favorite half-sister?

563
00:20:50,115 --> 00:20:51,514
What's up on the Worst Coast?

564
00:20:52,985 --> 00:20:54,213
Uh, you don't need to cry.

565
00:20:54,286 --> 00:20:55,514
I'm only joking around
with you.

566
00:20:55,587 --> 00:20:57,748
California's not...

567
00:20:58,824 --> 00:21:00,086
Wait, what?

568
00:21:02,794 --> 00:21:03,988
My dad had a heart attack.

569
00:21:07,432 --> 00:21:08,456
Okay, Little Danny.
Well, I'm...

570
00:21:08,533 --> 00:21:10,194
I'm going to get out there
as soon as I can.

571
00:21:10,469 --> 00:21:11,902
Just call me if
anything changes.

572
00:21:12,671 --> 00:21:14,298
Okay.

573
00:21:17,409 --> 00:21:18,398
Are you okay?

574
00:21:18,477 --> 00:21:20,342
He's stable, but...

575
00:21:20,412 --> 00:21:22,312
Son of a bitch
smoked his whole life.

576
00:21:22,381 --> 00:21:23,405
I mean, I told him.

577
00:21:23,482 --> 00:21:25,211
"You can't...
You got to exercise, Dad."

578
00:21:25,284 --> 00:21:27,377
And he ate like crap.
I mean, it's no surprise.

579
00:21:28,453 --> 00:21:30,478
Okay,
I got to get out there.

580
00:21:30,555 --> 00:21:32,785
I mean, I don't know
what kind of doctors
he has out there.

581
00:21:34,593 --> 00:21:35,855
I got a delivery on Wednesday.

582
00:21:36,261 --> 00:21:39,059
What are they going to do
in the office without
either one of us?

583
00:21:40,499 --> 00:21:42,296
What the hell
am I talking about?

584
00:21:42,367 --> 00:21:45,131
I can't go.
I... We have a son.

585
00:21:45,203 --> 00:21:46,261
I'm not...
No, no, no, no.

586
00:21:46,338 --> 00:21:47,669
I'm... I'm not going to go.
I got to stay with Leo.

587
00:21:47,739 --> 00:21:49,468
It's okay. It's okay.
Here's what we're going to do.

588
00:21:49,541 --> 00:21:51,509
I'm going to help you pack
and then you're going to
go out there

589
00:21:51,576 --> 00:21:53,669
and be with your dad
and with your sister.

590
00:21:53,745 --> 00:21:55,940
And then I'm going to go
back to work while you're gone

591
00:21:56,014 --> 00:21:58,744
and your mom can
take care of Leo
like she did today,

592
00:21:58,817 --> 00:22:01,377
and it's going to be okay.

593
00:22:05,123 --> 00:22:07,023
Oh, God.
You're the best.

594
00:22:07,092 --> 00:22:08,218
Thank you.

595
00:22:10,128 --> 00:22:11,527
I'm so sorry.
It's okay.

596
00:22:11,596 --> 00:22:13,086
It's going to be
okay, right?

597
00:22:13,165 --> 00:22:15,929
Uh... I'm going to...

598
00:22:16,001 --> 00:22:17,628
I'm going to call Richie.

599
00:22:17,903 --> 00:22:18,995
Thank you, babe.

600
00:22:20,372 --> 00:22:22,067
I'm actually happy to
go back to work.

601
00:22:24,000 --> 00:22:28,000
<b><font color="#0E7521">Ripped & Corrected By mstoll</font></b>

