1
00:00:03,277 --> 00:00:05,044
Come on! Are you kidding me?!

2
00:00:05,079 --> 00:00:06,546
What are you, blind?

3
00:00:06,666 --> 00:00:07,593
Ken, you screaming

4
00:00:07,713 --> 00:00:09,566
- isn't gonna change the score.
- I don't care!

5
00:00:09,568 --> 00:00:10,867
David Arquette's waltz

6
00:00:10,901 --> 00:00:13,002
was clearly the dance of the night!

7
00:00:15,139 --> 00:00:16,106
Hey!

8
00:00:16,941 --> 00:00:20,126
Mother, Father, thank
you so much for coming.

9
00:00:20,177 --> 00:00:22,128
To our living room?

10
00:00:22,179 --> 00:00:24,297
Please just relax.

11
00:00:24,348 --> 00:00:25,798
Dave!

12
00:00:25,850 --> 00:00:27,684
Um, what is this about?

13
00:00:27,718 --> 00:00:28,885
- Warm snickerdoodle?
- All right.

14
00:00:28,887 --> 00:00:30,937
Don't doodle it, Allison. It's a trap.

15
00:00:35,726 --> 00:00:37,143
What is it that unites all humans?

16
00:00:37,194 --> 00:00:39,028
Money. No, power.

17
00:00:39,063 --> 00:00:40,396
- Love?
- Now, think before you speak.

18
00:00:40,398 --> 00:00:41,981
Chocolate! The Olympics!

19
00:00:42,032 --> 00:00:43,316
What unites all humans

20
00:00:43,367 --> 00:00:45,201
is their need to carry things.

21
00:00:45,235 --> 00:00:46,152
Damn.

22
00:00:46,203 --> 00:00:47,787
Hunters and gatherers were nothing

23
00:00:47,821 --> 00:00:50,740
without something to
carry what they, well...

24
00:00:50,742 --> 00:00:52,241
hunted and gathered.

25
00:00:55,079 --> 00:00:56,462
On this piece of paper,

26
00:00:56,497 --> 00:00:59,749
you will find what you call a backpack,

27
00:00:59,800 --> 00:01:02,251
what I call a dreamcatcher.

28
00:01:02,302 --> 00:01:04,087
Molly, we're not gonna be swayed by...

29
00:01:04,138 --> 00:01:05,588
Wow, that is a beautiful bag.

30
00:01:05,639 --> 00:01:08,257
Right? It's a Gordon Ruby.

31
00:01:08,259 --> 00:01:10,426
Okay, so how much is catching dreams

32
00:01:10,477 --> 00:01:11,594
gonna set us back?

33
00:01:11,596 --> 00:01:13,729
It's on the other side of your handout,

34
00:01:13,764 --> 00:01:15,932
but what is a price, really?

35
00:01:15,934 --> 00:01:17,700
Okay, thank you for the cookie.

36
00:01:18,902 --> 00:01:20,703
Dad, I know it seems expensive,

37
00:01:20,705 --> 00:01:22,338
but it'll last forever.

38
00:01:22,340 --> 00:01:24,740
This costs more than my first car.

39
00:01:24,775 --> 00:01:26,075
No... way.

40
00:01:26,077 --> 00:01:27,877
But this isn't fair!

41
00:01:27,928 --> 00:01:29,045
You want to know about not fair?

42
00:01:29,096 --> 00:01:30,980
Call David Arquette. He'll tell you.

43
00:01:31,031 --> 00:01:34,083
Look, it is not my fault you
settled in an affluent area

44
00:01:34,134 --> 00:01:36,786
where something like the
brand of your backpack

45
00:01:36,820 --> 00:01:38,020
doesn't go unnoticed.

46
00:01:38,022 --> 00:01:40,106
We are so sorry for imprisoning you

47
00:01:40,157 --> 00:01:42,858
in this upper middle
class Neo-Tuscan hell hole.

48
00:01:44,494 --> 00:01:45,561
Mom.

49
00:01:45,612 --> 00:01:48,280
Allison... can I call you Allison?

50
00:01:48,332 --> 00:01:49,465
It's a "no" from both of us.

51
00:01:52,636 --> 00:01:54,720
You were only supposed
to throw the confetti

52
00:01:54,771 --> 00:01:56,105
if they said yes.

53
00:01:56,139 --> 00:01:57,890
That's why I wanted a dress rehearsal.

54
00:02:05,209 --> 00:02:08,727
Okay, I am not saying I
want to go to prison.

55
00:02:08,778 --> 00:02:10,178
I am just saying,

56
00:02:10,213 --> 00:02:13,949
it would be nice to have
that much time to read.

57
00:02:15,351 --> 00:02:18,253
Clark, we all have prison fantasies.

58
00:02:19,422 --> 00:02:22,507
In mine, I'm being
courted by all the gangs.

59
00:02:23,843 --> 00:02:26,211
Oh, Pat, I've got to leave
a little early tonight.

60
00:02:26,262 --> 00:02:27,963
Before you tell me the reason, no.

61
00:02:27,965 --> 00:02:29,881
It's important. I have dinner plans.

62
00:02:29,932 --> 00:02:30,966
My sister's in town.

63
00:02:31,017 --> 00:02:32,434
Oh, Dr. Wendi's in town?

64
00:02:32,468 --> 00:02:34,469
- Yep.
- Wait, Dr. Wendi?

65
00:02:34,471 --> 00:02:36,805
The Dr. Wendi
from "the Dr. Wendi Show"?

66
00:02:36,807 --> 00:02:38,773
The star of my dream where I'm sick

67
00:02:38,808 --> 00:02:40,809
and my doctor's Dr. Wendi, Dr. Wendi?

68
00:02:40,860 --> 00:02:42,444
Yes, that Dr. Wendi.

69
00:02:42,478 --> 00:02:45,030
- You know my sister's show?
- Yeah!

70
00:02:45,064 --> 00:02:48,149
I used to watch it every
day when I lived in Buffalo.

71
00:02:48,200 --> 00:02:51,319
Sorry to city drop like
that, but I lived in Buffalo.

72
00:02:51,370 --> 00:02:55,323
Yeah, I guess they're shooting
in L.A. this week or...

73
00:02:55,325 --> 00:02:57,659
Yes, because they just
became nationally syndicated.

74
00:02:57,661 --> 00:03:00,495
Oh, that's... your sister has
a national television program?

75
00:03:00,546 --> 00:03:02,664
Oh, yeah. It's huge.

76
00:03:02,666 --> 00:03:04,249
Okay, I-I'll tell you what.

77
00:03:04,300 --> 00:03:06,668
You can go early if you get
your sister to plug the clinic.

78
00:03:06,719 --> 00:03:09,137
Fine. The four people who watch her show

79
00:03:09,171 --> 00:03:11,172
will hear all about Welltopia.

80
00:03:11,174 --> 00:03:12,307
- I watch it.
- I know.

81
00:03:12,341 --> 00:03:14,342
I was counting you and your three cats.

82
00:03:15,811 --> 00:03:17,395
That's a good one.

83
00:03:18,347 --> 00:03:19,647
I just can't believe

84
00:03:19,682 --> 00:03:21,933
that you and Dr. Wendi are related.

85
00:03:21,984 --> 00:03:25,186
She is so compassionate and witty and warm,

86
00:03:25,237 --> 00:03:27,489
and you, uh...

87
00:03:27,523 --> 00:03:29,524
you took it a different way.

88
00:03:31,026 --> 00:03:32,777
So, what's it like having her as a sister?

89
00:03:32,828 --> 00:03:35,363
Well, to be honest, she used
to be a bit of a hot mess.

90
00:03:35,365 --> 00:03:36,614
After college,

91
00:03:36,665 --> 00:03:38,199
she lived in an airstream
trailer in Santa Cruz

92
00:03:38,250 --> 00:03:39,701
with some old hippie dude, Dax.

93
00:03:39,752 --> 00:03:41,452
Not a fragrant man.

94
00:03:41,503 --> 00:03:43,204
So, what happened?

95
00:03:43,255 --> 00:03:44,539
Well, my parents were freaked out.

96
00:03:44,590 --> 00:03:45,556
I brought her back to L.A.,

97
00:03:45,607 --> 00:03:46,808
treated her dreadlocks for lice,

98
00:03:46,842 --> 00:03:48,159
and helped her apply to med school.

99
00:03:49,511 --> 00:03:51,479
You are such a good big brother.

100
00:03:51,513 --> 00:03:54,282
I just grow where I'm planted.

101
00:03:54,333 --> 00:03:56,884
Okay, one question.

102
00:03:56,886 --> 00:03:58,853
Would it be cool if I came to dinner?

103
00:03:58,871 --> 00:04:01,372
No. Got it.

104
00:04:01,423 --> 00:04:03,391
Unrelated question,

105
00:04:03,393 --> 00:04:05,293
where is the dinner?

106
00:04:10,415 --> 00:04:11,783
Good evening, Dr. Park.

107
00:04:11,834 --> 00:04:13,718
Welcome back to Apple Bushel.

108
00:04:13,769 --> 00:04:14,802
Thanks so much.

109
00:04:14,804 --> 00:04:16,571
I appreciate you saving us our usual table.

110
00:04:16,622 --> 00:04:18,039
Do you have change for a $2?

111
00:04:18,090 --> 00:04:19,006
Oh, no, please.

112
00:04:19,008 --> 00:04:20,841
Your sister already tipped me.

113
00:04:20,843 --> 00:04:23,327
She got here first and
requested this table.

114
00:04:23,378 --> 00:04:24,879
Hello, hello, hello!

115
00:04:24,930 --> 00:04:25,846
Hey!

116
00:04:27,649 --> 00:04:28,783
Wen-Wen!

117
00:04:28,785 --> 00:04:30,418
Allison, you sexy bitch.

118
00:04:30,420 --> 00:04:32,353
I love this dress.

119
00:04:32,355 --> 00:04:34,589
Oh, I'm sorry, I'm not
around kids very much.

120
00:04:34,623 --> 00:04:36,390
But you guys are sexy bitches, too.

121
00:04:38,727 --> 00:04:40,544
Good to see you, aunt Wendi.

122
00:04:40,579 --> 00:04:42,213
Sorry I had to switch tables.

123
00:04:42,247 --> 00:04:44,098
I can't sit by the door anymore.

124
00:04:44,132 --> 00:04:45,733
People keep coming up to me.

125
00:04:45,767 --> 00:04:47,702
It just ruins the meal for everyone.

126
00:04:47,753 --> 00:04:49,036
People keep coming up to you?

127
00:04:49,087 --> 00:04:50,204
What, like the busboys?

128
00:04:50,238 --> 00:04:51,806
They're just refilling your water, Wendi.

129
00:04:52,858 --> 00:04:54,842
Oh, my God, you are just blowing up.

130
00:04:54,876 --> 00:04:57,645
Mom, Dad, thanks for making the trip.

131
00:04:57,679 --> 00:04:59,063
How was the drive?

132
00:04:59,114 --> 00:05:01,165
No drive. Wendi send Uber car.

133
00:05:01,216 --> 00:05:03,217
Uber black.

134
00:05:03,885 --> 00:05:04,919
Okay, um, well,

135
00:05:04,953 --> 00:05:07,121
tonight's the prime rib meal deal,

136
00:05:07,123 --> 00:05:08,505
which I highly recommend.

137
00:05:08,540 --> 00:05:10,524
The baked potato's a dollar more,

138
00:05:10,559 --> 00:05:11,692
but it's delicious.

139
00:05:11,726 --> 00:05:13,928
Sometimes you gots to live a little.

140
00:05:15,096 --> 00:05:18,032
You really sold it. I'm in.

141
00:05:18,034 --> 00:05:19,083
You know what?

142
00:05:19,117 --> 00:05:21,018
Everyone get the baked potato tonight.

143
00:05:21,052 --> 00:05:22,603
Dinner is on me.

144
00:05:22,654 --> 00:05:23,570
Oh.

145
00:05:23,605 --> 00:05:26,340
Oh. Baller alert.

146
00:05:26,374 --> 00:05:27,675
Oh, hey, guys,

147
00:05:27,742 --> 00:05:29,743
did you get the video of me
emceeing the H.M.O. Banquet?

148
00:05:29,745 --> 00:05:31,879
So clever. So talented.

149
00:05:31,881 --> 00:05:34,181
Yes, I am.

150
00:05:34,183 --> 00:05:35,950
You know, I just taped
a little comedy sketch

151
00:05:35,952 --> 00:05:36,717
for Jimmy Kimmel.

152
00:05:36,751 --> 00:05:38,419
Oh, the fat Jimmy?

153
00:05:38,421 --> 00:05:39,970
Oh, he's the funny one.

154
00:05:40,021 --> 00:05:41,288
That is so cool.

155
00:05:41,322 --> 00:05:43,257
Wendi, you really big deal.

156
00:05:43,291 --> 00:05:44,875
Yeah, so work's good,

157
00:05:44,926 --> 00:05:48,629
and, uh, you know, I'm
taking my med school degree

158
00:05:48,663 --> 00:05:50,664
and applying it to save lives.

159
00:05:50,715 --> 00:05:54,134
Like, front line. Boots on the ground.

160
00:05:55,203 --> 00:05:57,471
Aunt Wendi, can I take a selfie with you?

161
00:05:57,522 --> 00:05:58,906
My friends will go crazy.

162
00:05:59,707 --> 00:06:01,375
I want one, too,

163
00:06:01,409 --> 00:06:02,709
just in case I make friends.

164
00:06:05,480 --> 00:06:07,648
Oh, you are gonna make friends

165
00:06:07,699 --> 00:06:10,000
when you post this awesomeness.

166
00:06:10,051 --> 00:06:12,603
Allison, get that
pilates-toned ass in here.

167
00:06:12,687 --> 00:06:14,988
I've only been twice, but
I really think it's working.

168
00:06:16,291 --> 00:06:19,109
- Come on, Grandma, Grandpa.
- Get in here.

169
00:06:21,195 --> 00:06:24,097
- Ken.
- Okay, fine.

170
00:06:24,132 --> 00:06:25,816
Wendi can't reach. You take selfie.

171
00:06:29,504 --> 00:06:30,671
Okay...

172
00:06:31,889 --> 00:06:33,440
- Oh!
- Yay!

173
00:06:33,474 --> 00:06:34,958
Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

174
00:06:34,992 --> 00:06:36,877
- Ken.
- Yeah?

175
00:06:36,928 --> 00:06:38,678
Take one from my phone.

176
00:06:42,166 --> 00:06:44,551
I fly all over the world.

177
00:06:44,585 --> 00:06:46,903
I did a nutrition workshop
at the White House.

178
00:06:46,938 --> 00:06:49,422
My TV show just hit the
five million viewer mark.

179
00:06:49,457 --> 00:06:51,558
I'm like, "how is this happening to me?"

180
00:06:52,560 --> 00:06:54,945
Yeah, well, recently, Welltopia was rated

181
00:06:54,996 --> 00:06:57,764
the number 3 H.M.O. in
the San Fernando Valley.

182
00:06:58,683 --> 00:07:02,502
And I was also like, "how
is this happening to me?"

183
00:07:02,537 --> 00:07:04,838
So, I get it.

184
00:07:04,840 --> 00:07:06,089
This is all so amazing.

185
00:07:06,140 --> 00:07:07,274
When I first met you,

186
00:07:07,325 --> 00:07:09,209
I did not think you'd end up here.

187
00:07:09,243 --> 00:07:10,877
- Me neither.
- To Wendi.

188
00:07:10,928 --> 00:07:12,679
- And... ?
- Her show.

189
00:07:19,437 --> 00:07:20,854
Seriously?

190
00:07:20,888 --> 00:07:21,688
Korean?

191
00:07:21,690 --> 00:07:22,689
I picked up a little

192
00:07:22,740 --> 00:07:24,441
on a syndication tour of Korea.

193
00:07:24,492 --> 00:07:25,675
I wanted to surprise you.

194
00:07:26,761 --> 00:07:28,845
They flew you to Korea for free?

195
00:07:28,879 --> 00:07:30,396
I want to be a TV doctor.

196
00:07:30,398 --> 00:07:32,448
You just have to study hard.

197
00:07:32,483 --> 00:07:33,500
Ish.

198
00:07:34,885 --> 00:07:37,237
Well, I'm trying to excel in school,

199
00:07:37,271 --> 00:07:40,106
but my parents keep
stacking the deck against me

200
00:07:40,157 --> 00:07:42,709
by not getting me a Gordon Ruby backpack.

201
00:07:42,711 --> 00:07:43,760
Oh, I'll give you one.

202
00:07:43,811 --> 00:07:45,979
- Really?!
- I have a closet full of them.

203
00:07:46,013 --> 00:07:48,114
People send me crazy stuff
for free all the time.

204
00:07:48,116 --> 00:07:49,716
I'm like, "what?!"

205
00:07:49,750 --> 00:07:51,885
- Oh, my God!
- So generous.

206
00:07:51,936 --> 00:07:53,219
Really great of you.

207
00:07:53,270 --> 00:07:55,521
Look, we don't need your
charity backpack, okay?

208
00:07:55,573 --> 00:07:56,823
Huh?

209
00:07:56,825 --> 00:07:59,125
Because...

210
00:07:59,159 --> 00:08:01,761
I'm getting her one, you know?

211
00:08:01,812 --> 00:08:03,396
Oh, my God, that's so generous.

212
00:08:03,430 --> 00:08:05,031
Really cool of me.

213
00:08:05,065 --> 00:08:06,399
Seriously?!

214
00:08:06,450 --> 00:08:08,201
Well, I just like to get the kids

215
00:08:08,235 --> 00:08:10,119
a little something when I come to town.

216
00:08:10,170 --> 00:08:13,423
I've been taken with that
crumb sweeper all night.

217
00:08:14,875 --> 00:08:16,209
- It's yours.
- No, no, no.

218
00:08:16,211 --> 00:08:19,212
I'm getting him the crumb sweeper, too.

219
00:08:19,263 --> 00:08:20,546
Geez, how do you say

220
00:08:20,548 --> 00:08:22,849
"thanks for ruining all
the surprises" in Korean?

221
00:08:24,518 --> 00:08:26,786
How long were you there?

222
00:08:30,502 --> 00:08:33,003
Hey, how was dinner with your sis?

223
00:08:33,038 --> 00:08:34,605
Did she pay? Of course she paid.

224
00:08:34,639 --> 00:08:35,906
For the first time ever.

225
00:08:35,957 --> 00:08:37,541
Wow, you are incredible.

226
00:08:37,559 --> 00:08:40,177
If I had a famous sister like Dr. Wendi,

227
00:08:40,211 --> 00:08:42,329
I would be so jealous,

228
00:08:42,364 --> 00:08:45,082
and yet you are just glaring at me.

229
00:08:47,085 --> 00:08:48,852
You know, what's there to be jealous of?

230
00:08:48,903 --> 00:08:50,871
She's just a mid-level
television personality

231
00:08:50,922 --> 00:08:52,022
who nobody even knows...

232
00:08:52,057 --> 00:08:53,357
Oh, my God, it's Dr. Wendi!

233
00:08:53,408 --> 00:08:57,111
Oh, my God.

234
00:08:57,145 --> 00:08:58,962
Can I have your autograph?

235
00:08:58,997 --> 00:09:01,315
This is someone's discharge papers.

236
00:09:01,366 --> 00:09:03,550
Two birds, one stone.

237
00:09:06,154 --> 00:09:07,371
Girl, I got to admit,

238
00:09:07,373 --> 00:09:09,106
I didn't love you at first,

239
00:09:11,176 --> 00:09:13,076
and he has shrunk on me.,

240
00:09:13,862 --> 00:09:15,646
Dr. Wendi, hi, I'm Pat Hein.

241
00:09:15,680 --> 00:09:18,081
I'm the medical director here
at Welltopia Woodland Hills,

242
00:09:18,116 --> 00:09:19,216
and we would just love it

243
00:09:19,250 --> 00:09:20,667
if you could do a segment on us.

244
00:09:20,702 --> 00:09:22,552
Well, I guess I could do something

245
00:09:22,554 --> 00:09:23,587
about the sad state

246
00:09:23,621 --> 00:09:26,123
of mid-level corporatized medicine.

247
00:09:26,157 --> 00:09:27,691
Name the day.

248
00:09:29,594 --> 00:09:32,412
So, what are you doing here?

249
00:09:32,463 --> 00:09:33,897
I wanted to come by and apologize.

250
00:09:33,931 --> 00:09:35,232
I feel like I overstepped last night

251
00:09:35,266 --> 00:09:36,249
with the backpack.

252
00:09:36,300 --> 00:09:38,168
- And the crumb sweeper.
- Yeah.

253
00:09:38,202 --> 00:09:40,087
Dave's turning out weird, huh?

254
00:09:40,138 --> 00:09:42,406
Yeah, we're keeping an eye on it.

255
00:09:42,408 --> 00:09:44,775
We are shooting our last
episode here tomorrow,

256
00:09:44,809 --> 00:09:47,344
and I wanted to ask you
to come and be on the show.

257
00:09:47,378 --> 00:09:49,479
We have a lot of doctors on as consultants.

258
00:09:49,530 --> 00:09:51,248
Oh, really?

259
00:09:51,315 --> 00:09:52,883
Wow, I-I haven't watched it yet.

260
00:09:52,917 --> 00:09:54,651
- You know, busy schedge.
- Please.

261
00:09:54,685 --> 00:09:57,020
You watch "Judge Mathis"
in your office every day.

262
00:09:58,823 --> 00:10:00,841
We just need a quick sound bite.

263
00:10:00,875 --> 00:10:02,309
Mom and Dad are coming.

264
00:10:02,360 --> 00:10:04,794
It would be really great
to have my big bro on.

265
00:10:04,796 --> 00:10:06,763
- I don't know.
- You have to do it.

266
00:10:06,781 --> 00:10:10,150
You've always said that you
dreamed of being on television.

267
00:10:10,184 --> 00:10:14,304
No, I said I had a dream
in which I was a television.

268
00:10:14,355 --> 00:10:16,373
If you're gonna throw my dreams in my face,

269
00:10:16,407 --> 00:10:18,391
I'll find someone else to share them with.

270
00:10:19,677 --> 00:10:21,878
My mistake. I'm very sorry.

271
00:10:21,912 --> 00:10:24,047
Yeah, I keep his dream journal.

272
00:10:24,081 --> 00:10:25,615
He was not a television.

273
00:10:29,754 --> 00:10:31,271
Okay, you guys, get ready

274
00:10:31,322 --> 00:10:33,340
because Sugar the Wonder
Dog is gonna tell us

275
00:10:33,374 --> 00:10:35,492
which one of these people has diabetes.

276
00:10:38,646 --> 00:10:40,713
Do you have diabetes?

277
00:10:42,349 --> 00:10:44,634
Unbelievable!

278
00:10:44,668 --> 00:10:47,454
Okay, who's ready for
an audience dance off?

279
00:10:47,488 --> 00:10:48,621
What-what?!

280
00:10:51,775 --> 00:10:53,877
A diabetes-sniffing dog?

281
00:10:53,911 --> 00:10:55,678
Are you kidding me?

282
00:10:55,713 --> 00:10:57,547
I know. Incredible.

283
00:10:57,598 --> 00:11:00,166
Yeah, incredibly stupid.

284
00:11:00,201 --> 00:11:01,818
If you're worried about having diabetes,

285
00:11:01,852 --> 00:11:03,219
you shouldn't be consulting a dog.

286
00:11:03,270 --> 00:11:06,889
You need Insulin,
not Rin-Tin-Tinsulin.

287
00:11:06,957 --> 00:11:08,491
Fresh.

288
00:11:08,525 --> 00:11:10,259
A lot of people are pretty into her show.

289
00:11:10,311 --> 00:11:12,028
That's because they
haven't seen the show I saw

290
00:11:12,079 --> 00:11:13,062
in that airstream trailer.

291
00:11:13,097 --> 00:11:14,864
It was called "I Will Not Shower,"

292
00:11:14,898 --> 00:11:16,449
and it ran for way too long.

293
00:11:17,801 --> 00:11:20,870
Dad, you are, like, the
hero of all my friends.

294
00:11:20,872 --> 00:11:22,872
- Oh, thank you.
- Do you have it?

295
00:11:22,906 --> 00:11:24,724
- Have what?
- The backpack.

296
00:11:24,758 --> 00:11:28,277
Molly, sweet, sweet Molly,

297
00:11:28,279 --> 00:11:30,346
that was never gonna happen.

298
00:11:30,348 --> 00:11:32,748
It was just something said

299
00:11:32,799 --> 00:11:35,051
in the middle of a pissing
contest between siblings.

300
00:11:35,085 --> 00:11:37,720
So, you just lied to me?

301
00:11:37,754 --> 00:11:39,188
Great parenting, Dad.

302
00:11:40,824 --> 00:11:42,675
You heard her. Great parenting.

303
00:11:42,709 --> 00:11:45,027
Take away the tone. That's a compliment.

304
00:11:45,029 --> 00:11:49,031
I don't think Wendi was
involved in that pissing contest.

305
00:11:49,066 --> 00:11:50,733
Yeah, she was. She was big-timing me.

306
00:11:50,767 --> 00:11:52,602
Just like today when she came to my office

307
00:11:52,604 --> 00:11:54,036
and asked me to be on her show.

308
00:11:54,087 --> 00:11:56,272
How exactly is that big-timing you?

309
00:11:56,306 --> 00:11:57,573
You just don't get it, do you?

310
00:11:57,607 --> 00:11:59,208
I really don't.

311
00:11:59,259 --> 00:12:00,793
This is her chance

312
00:12:00,844 --> 00:12:03,112
in front of Mom, Dad, and the entire world

313
00:12:03,146 --> 00:12:06,382
to finally show up her high
achieving, handsome, athletic...

314
00:12:06,384 --> 00:12:08,284
If he had been encouraged... brother.

315
00:12:08,286 --> 00:12:10,019
Ken, admit it.

316
00:12:10,053 --> 00:12:11,153
You're jealous of Wendi.

317
00:12:11,188 --> 00:12:12,955
Jealous?

318
00:12:13,006 --> 00:12:14,840
Wow.

319
00:12:14,891 --> 00:12:16,525
Who gave this lady her therapy license,

320
00:12:16,527 --> 00:12:17,793
am I right?

321
00:12:18,628 --> 00:12:20,529
Okay, fine, if you're gonna
make jokes to the lamp about me,

322
00:12:20,564 --> 00:12:22,114
- don't do Wendi's show.
- No, no, whoa, whoa.

323
00:12:22,165 --> 00:12:24,216
I'm gonna do it, but as a real doctor.

324
00:12:24,267 --> 00:12:26,152
I'm not gonna condescend to people.

325
00:12:26,203 --> 00:12:28,587
You know, talk down to them.

326
00:12:28,638 --> 00:12:32,374
Look, maybe I'm just
a therapist who's super smart,

327
00:12:32,409 --> 00:12:34,343
but you obviously have
issues with your sister,

328
00:12:34,394 --> 00:12:35,544
and at some point,

329
00:12:35,579 --> 00:12:37,079
you're gonna have to
talk to her about them.

330
00:12:37,081 --> 00:12:38,514
Okay, whatever.

331
00:12:38,548 --> 00:12:41,750
Piece of advice for you
don't marry a therapist.

332
00:12:43,721 --> 00:12:44,853
I'm gonna leave you two alone.

333
00:12:49,025 --> 00:12:51,060
This is like the second part of my dream

334
00:12:51,094 --> 00:12:52,611
where Dr. Wendi is my doctor

335
00:12:52,662 --> 00:12:54,546
and she takes me into the exam room,

336
00:12:54,597 --> 00:12:57,866
but the exam room is
this green room.

337
00:12:58,835 --> 00:13:00,853
Come on, guys, act like you've been here.

338
00:13:00,904 --> 00:13:02,104
Sorry. You're right.

339
00:13:02,138 --> 00:13:03,372
I... shrimp.

340
00:13:03,423 --> 00:13:04,973
Aw, hell, no.

341
00:13:07,777 --> 00:13:09,511
Dr. Park, you're on in 10. You ready?

342
00:13:09,546 --> 00:13:11,430
I was born ready.

343
00:13:11,481 --> 00:13:13,782
Okay, I'm just gonna tell
them that you're ready.

344
00:13:13,833 --> 00:13:16,218
All right, now remember,
the topic is heatstroke,

345
00:13:16,220 --> 00:13:18,036
and if there's a dance break,
we prefer that you dance.

346
00:13:18,088 --> 00:13:20,773
- Yeah, I'm not gonna dance.
- It's okay.

347
00:13:20,807 --> 00:13:22,624
- Even if you're not good...
- Yeah, I'm gonna stop you right there.

348
00:13:22,659 --> 00:13:25,861
I've got moves for days.

349
00:13:25,895 --> 00:13:29,765
But today, I come to you
as a doctor, not a dancer.

350
00:13:29,799 --> 00:13:31,867
It's been great meeting you.

351
00:13:33,353 --> 00:13:35,404
Ken? Oh, Ken.

352
00:13:35,406 --> 00:13:37,406
- What are you doing here?
- Well, I came to remind you

353
00:13:37,440 --> 00:13:39,107
that you promised to
plug the clinic on air.

354
00:13:39,142 --> 00:13:40,342
Just say something like,

355
00:13:40,376 --> 00:13:42,644
"Welltopia, where well meets topia

356
00:13:42,646 --> 00:13:43,945
in the San Fernando Valley."

357
00:13:43,997 --> 00:13:45,681
"Topia's" not a word.

358
00:13:45,715 --> 00:13:46,915
Neither is shrimpgasm,

359
00:13:46,950 --> 00:13:49,184
but that is what is happening right now.

360
00:13:57,660 --> 00:13:59,261
20 ounces down.

361
00:13:59,312 --> 00:14:02,848
44 more to go for ideal hydration!

362
00:14:02,882 --> 00:14:06,568
And now, as a special
treat for heatstroke week,

363
00:14:06,602 --> 00:14:08,570
I want to introduce you to

364
00:14:08,604 --> 00:14:11,173
a super awesome doctor and my big bro.

365
00:14:11,207 --> 00:14:13,141
Please welcome Dr. Ken Park!

366
00:14:13,192 --> 00:14:15,577
Yes! Yes!

367
00:14:16,662 --> 00:14:17,996
Whoo!

368
00:14:18,047 --> 00:14:19,848
Hi!

369
00:14:19,850 --> 00:14:21,316
Hi.

370
00:14:23,819 --> 00:14:25,103
Shout-out to Mom and Dad!

371
00:14:27,323 --> 00:14:29,925
So, avoiding heatstroke,

372
00:14:29,959 --> 00:14:32,027
to wear a hat or not to wear a hat.

373
00:14:32,044 --> 00:14:33,211
That is the question.

374
00:14:33,262 --> 00:14:35,697
Well, I think we have to
back it up a little bit.

375
00:14:35,731 --> 00:14:37,532
Heatstroke is a result of the body

376
00:14:37,534 --> 00:14:39,934
- trying to regulate...
- So, hats... good or bad?

377
00:14:39,985 --> 00:14:42,170
Well, um, good,

378
00:14:42,204 --> 00:14:44,939
but it's important to look
at all the factors involved

379
00:14:44,974 --> 00:14:48,610
in temperature regulation
okay, so a hat it is!

380
00:14:48,644 --> 00:14:50,912
Ladies and gentlemen, Dr. Ken Park!

381
00:14:50,946 --> 00:14:52,831
Ken Park!

382
00:14:52,882 --> 00:14:55,450
Coming up next, we solve the mystery of

383
00:14:55,484 --> 00:14:58,219
what that tricky SPF number actually means.

384
00:14:59,523 --> 00:15:01,072
You can go now.

385
00:15:01,123 --> 00:15:03,308
- I'm not done.
- You're not?

386
00:15:03,359 --> 00:15:05,560
Uh, in order to prevent heatstroke,

387
00:15:05,594 --> 00:15:07,762
one must identify the three main...

388
00:15:07,796 --> 00:15:10,231
Okay, hats off to you, big bro.

389
00:15:10,282 --> 00:15:13,968
And now I have hats for
everyone in the audience!

390
00:15:14,003 --> 00:15:15,670
What?!

391
00:15:15,704 --> 00:15:17,005
Look under your seat.

392
00:15:17,056 --> 00:15:18,089
- You get a hat!
- Oh, my God!

393
00:15:18,140 --> 00:15:19,140
You get a hat!

394
00:15:19,142 --> 00:15:20,108
You get a hat!

395
00:15:21,745 --> 00:15:24,178
Okay, you can't solve
everything with a hat, Wendi.

396
00:15:24,229 --> 00:15:25,980
Well, you can solve heatstroke.

397
00:15:25,998 --> 00:15:28,249
- Anyway...
- Not if you're young, elderly,

398
00:15:28,284 --> 00:15:29,717
or have a compromised immune system.

399
00:15:29,719 --> 00:15:30,685
Boom!

400
00:15:30,736 --> 00:15:31,986
Whoo! Yes!

401
00:15:31,988 --> 00:15:33,021
That's true,

402
00:15:33,055 --> 00:15:35,690
but we like to keep
things light on the show.

403
00:15:36,992 --> 00:15:39,127
Uh, real medicine isn't light.

404
00:15:39,129 --> 00:15:41,496
People die on my watch every day.

405
00:15:41,530 --> 00:15:42,580
Yes, they do!

406
00:15:42,614 --> 00:15:44,682
Many people die! Whoo!

407
00:15:47,903 --> 00:15:49,470
Hey, I do a lot of good on this show,

408
00:15:49,505 --> 00:15:51,072
and people take it really seriously.

409
00:15:51,106 --> 00:15:54,308
F.Y.I... if someone can
do this on a show,

410
00:15:54,343 --> 00:15:57,011
then it's not serious.

411
00:15:57,045 --> 00:15:58,880
You know, no, I am...

412
00:16:00,349 --> 00:16:01,582
You just don't get it

413
00:16:01,617 --> 00:16:03,618
because you're small and jealous.

414
00:16:03,669 --> 00:16:04,952
I'm not jealous of a doctor

415
00:16:04,954 --> 00:16:06,721
who went to med school in the Caribbean.

416
00:16:07,856 --> 00:16:09,106
I mean, her diploma says,

417
00:16:09,157 --> 00:16:10,424
"Good job, Mon."

418
00:16:10,459 --> 00:16:11,809
You know what, he's right.

419
00:16:11,843 --> 00:16:14,061
I did go to med school in the Caribbean.

420
00:16:14,063 --> 00:16:15,963
A fully accredited medical school,

421
00:16:15,998 --> 00:16:18,532
and I went there because
I took a different path.

422
00:16:18,567 --> 00:16:20,701
I wanted to have some fun along the way.

423
00:16:20,736 --> 00:16:23,037
Yeah, you had a lot of fun.

424
00:16:23,071 --> 00:16:25,790
At least I wasn't a virgin at 30.

425
00:16:27,826 --> 00:16:30,327
Sorry I respected my body!

426
00:16:37,086 --> 00:16:39,170
Welltopia... where well meets topia

427
00:16:39,221 --> 00:16:41,589
in the San Fernando Valley.

428
00:16:51,509 --> 00:16:53,977
I invite you here, and you do that?

429
00:16:54,012 --> 00:16:55,929
You just asked me here to big-time me.

430
00:16:55,980 --> 00:16:57,181
I asked you here

431
00:16:57,183 --> 00:17:00,067
because you're my brother
and a doctor.

432
00:17:00,101 --> 00:17:01,235
You know what I think?

433
00:17:01,269 --> 00:17:03,687
You wish I was still a
lost little 20-something

434
00:17:03,689 --> 00:17:06,023
living in a trailer in
Santa Cruz, don't you?

435
00:17:06,074 --> 00:17:08,025
Of course not. You had lice.

436
00:17:08,027 --> 00:17:10,994
Then my Camry had lice
for the next six months.

437
00:17:11,029 --> 00:17:12,696
You've always been the perfect one

438
00:17:12,698 --> 00:17:14,164
that Mom and Dad worshipped,

439
00:17:14,199 --> 00:17:15,616
and I've always been the one

440
00:17:15,667 --> 00:17:17,835
that did things with an
asterisk next to them.

441
00:17:17,869 --> 00:17:20,537
Got a bachelor degree in six years.

442
00:17:20,588 --> 00:17:22,923
Went to medical school... on a boat.

443
00:17:22,957 --> 00:17:25,125
Finally, I have some success,

444
00:17:25,176 --> 00:17:27,427
and I wanted to show it off to you

445
00:17:27,462 --> 00:17:29,379
not because I think I'm better than you,

446
00:17:29,381 --> 00:17:31,214
but because I thought I owed it to you.

447
00:17:31,266 --> 00:17:33,550
You bailed me out so many times.

448
00:17:33,601 --> 00:17:36,853
I couldn't do any of this
without my big brother.

449
00:17:36,888 --> 00:17:39,222
I didn't know you felt that way about me.

450
00:17:39,273 --> 00:17:40,974
Of course I do.

451
00:17:41,025 --> 00:17:42,609
I always have.

452
00:17:42,644 --> 00:17:47,447
So, everything you have is because of me?

453
00:17:48,616 --> 00:17:49,733
Not everything.

454
00:17:49,784 --> 00:17:54,571
Wow, everything you have is because of me.

455
00:17:56,073 --> 00:17:59,242
Okay, now I know what Allison
is always complaining about.

456
00:17:59,293 --> 00:18:00,627
Look, I'm sorry.

457
00:18:00,661 --> 00:18:03,413
I am small, and I did get jealous,

458
00:18:03,464 --> 00:18:05,382
but I'm also really impressed.

459
00:18:05,416 --> 00:18:07,217
I mean, your show is legit.

460
00:18:07,251 --> 00:18:08,635
Well, we could probably

461
00:18:08,669 --> 00:18:10,464
dig a little deeper on some issues.

462
00:18:10,712 --> 00:18:13,089
Either way, you're helping people,

463
00:18:13,091 --> 00:18:15,141
and I am so proud of you.

464
00:18:15,176 --> 00:18:16,843
Aww.

465
00:18:16,894 --> 00:18:19,396
You know, I'm gonna be in L.A. a lot now,

466
00:18:19,430 --> 00:18:21,765
and I really want to see you guys more.

467
00:18:21,816 --> 00:18:23,650
I think we'd all like that.

468
00:18:23,684 --> 00:18:25,935
You know, you're not the first Park

469
00:18:25,986 --> 00:18:29,272
to dip his toe into the
world of medical infotainment.

470
00:18:29,274 --> 00:18:31,024
Remember my show on the campus TV station

471
00:18:31,075 --> 00:18:31,858
back in med school?

472
00:18:31,909 --> 00:18:33,026
That's right.

473
00:18:33,077 --> 00:18:34,828
"Yo! K-MD Raps!"

474
00:18:34,862 --> 00:18:36,746
Good times.

475
00:18:38,249 --> 00:18:42,285
We are very disappointed in you two.

476
00:18:43,337 --> 00:18:44,754
You have brought shame...

477
00:18:44,789 --> 00:18:45,789
Oh, shrimp.

478
00:18:47,124 --> 00:18:48,174
Come on.

479
00:18:52,963 --> 00:18:54,631
So, when's the show gonna be on?

480
00:18:54,682 --> 00:18:55,882
Oh, it's never gonna air.

481
00:18:55,933 --> 00:18:57,634
I wrecked it by fighting with her.

482
00:18:57,685 --> 00:19:01,137
Apparently I cost the studio
over a million dollars.

483
00:19:01,188 --> 00:19:04,057
It's like I kept telling you,

484
00:19:04,108 --> 00:19:05,191
all I needed to do

485
00:19:05,225 --> 00:19:07,393
was talk to Wendi about my feelings.

486
00:19:07,444 --> 00:19:08,861
She just doesn't listen.

487
00:19:08,896 --> 00:19:11,397
Wives, right?

488
00:19:11,448 --> 00:19:13,950
Look, I know you've always
been the star of your family,

489
00:19:13,984 --> 00:19:15,902
and it's not easy to share the spotlight.

490
00:19:15,953 --> 00:19:17,620
So, you're saying I'm a star?

491
00:19:17,655 --> 00:19:19,706
No. I'm saying...

492
00:19:19,740 --> 00:19:21,407
You know what? Yes, Ken, you're a star.

493
00:19:24,044 --> 00:19:26,379
Oh, oh, you can ignore me,

494
00:19:26,413 --> 00:19:29,882
but you can't ignore this.

495
00:19:38,976 --> 00:19:41,307
There were other promises made that night.

496
00:19:41,427 --> 00:19:42,443
I remember.

497
00:19:42,563 --> 00:19:44,347
Here's your very own crumb sweeper.

498
00:19:45,098 --> 00:19:47,183
Oh, my god. Who wants toast?

499
00:19:50,103 --> 00:19:52,021
Yeah, he's getting weirder.

500
00:19:53,690 --> 00:19:55,574
Welcome to "Yo! K-MD Raps!"

501
00:19:55,609 --> 00:19:57,610
A live show where you call in

502
00:19:57,661 --> 00:20:00,162
and I, Ken Park, your resident resident

503
00:20:00,197 --> 00:20:03,082
will rap about your
medical concerns with you.

504
00:20:04,334 --> 00:20:05,334
Oh, first call ever.

505
00:20:06,536 --> 00:20:08,037
Yo, this is K-MD.

506
00:20:08,088 --> 00:20:09,705
What yo problem?

507
00:20:09,707 --> 00:20:11,073
I have a sharp pain

508
00:20:11,091 --> 00:20:13,759
in the right lower part of my stomach.

509
00:20:13,794 --> 00:20:16,345
Yo, Steven, drop a beat.

510
00:20:21,385 --> 00:20:22,718
♪ Sometimes it's hard to figure out ♪

511
00:20:22,769 --> 00:20:23,886
♪ What's going on inside us ♪

512
00:20:23,888 --> 00:20:25,054
♪ But I can tell you that ♪

513
00:20:25,056 --> 00:20:26,555
♪ What you described's appendicitis ♪

514
00:20:26,557 --> 00:20:28,807
♪ You say you got a shooting
pain inside your abdomen ♪

515
00:20:28,859 --> 00:20:31,310
♪ Hang up the phone with
Dr. K and go call 911 ♪

516
00:20:31,361 --> 00:20:32,394
Actually, no, seriously,

517
00:20:32,445 --> 00:20:34,396
hang up the phone and dial 911.

518
00:20:34,447 --> 00:20:35,814
Word to your moms!

519
00:20:35,866 --> 00:20:38,067
Or whoever your emergency contact may be.

520
00:20:38,118 --> 00:20:39,368
Take us out, Steve!

521
00:20:55,302 --> 00:20:56,585
Sha-ma!

522
00:20:56,636 --> 00:20:57,753
Sha-ma!

523
00:20:57,755 --> 00:20:59,355
Sha-ma!

524
00:20:59,379 --> 00:21:01,379
Synced and corrected by Octavia
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