1
00:00:03,248 --> 00:00:04,881
Morning, thugs.

2
00:00:04,950 --> 00:00:06,783
Morning, gangsta.

3
00:00:06,852 --> 00:00:07,884
Morning, playa.

4
00:00:07,953 --> 00:00:10,286
Aww, I love what we have.

5
00:00:10,355 --> 00:00:11,621
Uh-huh.

6
00:00:11,690 --> 00:00:12,889
Uh-huh.

7
00:00:12,958 --> 00:00:14,357
Patient.

8
00:00:14,426 --> 00:00:17,227
No, I don't think the only
reason your mother had you

9
00:00:17,295 --> 00:00:19,496
was so that she could be
a bitch to you.

10
00:00:19,564 --> 00:00:23,564
Ah, the holidays...
Stockings full of gifts,

11
00:00:23,802 --> 00:00:26,002
your mom's voice mail
full of messages

12
00:00:26,071 --> 00:00:29,038
from sobbing lunatics
who can't handle their business.

13
00:00:29,107 --> 00:00:31,107
Christmas or not,

14
00:00:31,176 --> 00:00:34,077
you just have to tell your
mother she has to respect you.

15
00:00:34,146 --> 00:00:35,846
Hey. Leggings are not pants.

16
00:00:36,114 --> 00:00:38,348
Mom, you have to respect me.

17
00:00:38,417 --> 00:00:40,383
Don't even.

18
00:00:40,452 --> 00:00:42,085
Look, I know the holidays can be lonely,

19
00:00:42,354 --> 00:00:43,720
but don't lose sight of the fact

20
00:00:43,789 --> 00:00:46,523
that you matter to a lot of people, Jill.

21
00:00:46,591 --> 00:00:48,124
Ellen. I meant Ellen.

22
00:00:49,227 --> 00:00:51,060
She hung up on me.

23
00:00:51,129 --> 00:00:52,595
What a whiner.

24
00:00:52,664 --> 00:00:54,130
I'm so sorry.

25
00:00:54,199 --> 00:00:56,666
I thought you hung up.

26
00:00:56,735 --> 00:00:57,834
Come here.

27
00:00:57,903 --> 00:01:00,036
What can hero husband do
to make it better?

28
00:01:00,105 --> 00:01:02,438
Fast-forward me
to our trip to Hawaii.

29
00:01:02,507 --> 00:01:04,440
Our couple's massage.

30
00:01:04,509 --> 00:01:06,776
And our couple's bed.

31
00:01:06,845 --> 00:01:08,344
It's just a bed, honey.

32
00:01:08,413 --> 00:01:10,213
It's a bed with a partially obstructed view

33
00:01:10,282 --> 00:01:12,482
of the hotel parking lot
because that's how daddy rolls.

34
00:01:13,285 --> 00:01:16,219
Mom, I'm gonna need
a new bathing suit for Hawaii.

35
00:01:16,288 --> 00:01:18,288
Stuff got real this year.

36
00:01:19,858 --> 00:01:21,691
I need one, too.

37
00:01:21,760 --> 00:01:25,495
I've been tightening up the front porch.

38
00:01:25,564 --> 00:01:27,363
Hold up, are you guys under the impression

39
00:01:27,432 --> 00:01:28,998
that you're coming to Hawaii with us?

40
00:01:29,067 --> 00:01:30,767
Yeah. I mean, aren't we?

41
00:01:30,836 --> 00:01:32,335
You said you were gonna tell them.

42
00:01:32,404 --> 00:01:33,536
No! Remember?

43
00:01:33,605 --> 00:01:34,904
You said you didn't
want me to tell them

44
00:01:34,973 --> 00:01:36,806
because you thought
I'd enjoy it too much.

45
00:01:36,875 --> 00:01:38,174
No. I said, "tell them.

46
00:01:38,243 --> 00:01:40,376
Just don't sound like
you're enjoying it too much."

47
00:01:40,445 --> 00:01:43,313
Okay, I'm not
that good an actor.

48
00:01:43,381 --> 00:01:44,948
Wait. What's happening here?

49
00:01:45,016 --> 00:01:46,850
Oh, my god, I'm so sorry, you guys,

50
00:01:46,918 --> 00:01:49,686
but your dad and I really need
a vacation alone together.

51
00:01:49,754 --> 00:01:51,855
Yeah. We haven't had time away,
just the two of us,

52
00:01:51,923 --> 00:01:54,090
since your mother had
her emergency appendectomy.

53
00:01:54,159 --> 00:01:56,693
God, that was a great few days.

54
00:01:56,761 --> 00:01:58,061
It was.

55
00:01:58,129 --> 00:02:00,263
Okay, so, you would
literally rather have surgery

56
00:02:00,332 --> 00:02:01,931
than vacation with your own children?

57
00:02:02,000 --> 00:02:03,700
Did she stutter?

58
00:02:03,768 --> 00:02:06,035
All right, all right, all right.

59
00:02:06,104 --> 00:02:08,171
It was a hard decision, honey,

60
00:02:08,240 --> 00:02:09,439
and we're really gonna miss you guys.

61
00:02:09,507 --> 00:02:10,773
This is so not fair!

62
00:02:10,842 --> 00:02:12,508
I want to learn how to surf!

63
00:02:12,577 --> 00:02:15,812
And I want to see how
resentful the locals are.

64
00:02:15,881 --> 00:02:17,747
I hear it's breathtaking!

65
00:02:19,451 --> 00:02:20,516
Look, I'm sorry, guys.

66
00:02:20,585 --> 00:02:22,185
You know, I'm really torn up about this.

67
00:02:23,188 --> 00:02:24,787
Ken!

68
00:02:24,856 --> 00:02:27,523
See? I told you I'm not that good an actor.

69
00:02:27,592 --> 00:02:28,658
Really?

70
00:02:28,727 --> 00:02:32,295
Gangsta gonna play me like that?

71
00:02:37,503 --> 00:02:40,903
Synced corrected -robtor-
www.Addic7ed.Com.

72
00:02:41,573 --> 00:02:45,408
Hey, Clark, my Jewish friend.

73
00:02:45,477 --> 00:02:48,378
I am neither of those things,
and don't touch me.

74
00:02:48,446 --> 00:02:52,446
Hey, where would a man of my ilk
get one of those beanie things?

75
00:02:52,851 --> 00:02:56,019
They're called yarmulkes,
and why do you need one?

76
00:02:56,087 --> 00:02:57,320
Oh, well, Christmas Eve,

77
00:02:57,389 --> 00:02:59,456
I'm going to this big
singles party... the Matzo Ball.

78
00:02:59,524 --> 00:03:00,690
Yeah.

79
00:03:00,759 --> 00:03:02,425
Hoping to put my noodle
in some kugel.

80
00:03:02,694 --> 00:03:04,260
If you know what I mean.

81
00:03:05,264 --> 00:03:07,464
Yeah, I'm... I'm talking about
hosin' one of the chosen.

82
00:03:09,000 --> 00:03:10,366
Get it?

83
00:03:10,435 --> 00:03:11,534
Oh, come on.

84
00:03:11,603 --> 00:03:14,570
Your people are famous
for your sense of humor.

85
00:03:14,639 --> 00:03:17,040
The gay, Lutheran vegans?

86
00:03:17,108 --> 00:03:18,548
Yeah, that's the stuff!

87
00:03:20,111 --> 00:03:21,144
- Um, pat.
- Huh?

88
00:03:21,212 --> 00:03:22,245
I need to talk to you.

89
00:03:22,314 --> 00:03:24,213
I have to request a day off.

90
00:03:24,282 --> 00:03:25,682
Oh, sorry.

91
00:03:25,750 --> 00:03:27,517
That's not my jurisdiction,
but would you like a raise?

92
00:03:27,585 --> 00:03:28,585
Sure.

93
00:03:28,620 --> 00:03:29,819
No.

94
00:03:29,888 --> 00:03:32,322
See? I'm happy to help you with that.

95
00:03:33,458 --> 00:03:35,258
Listen, don't worry about it.

96
00:03:35,327 --> 00:03:36,426
Just talk to Damona.

97
00:03:36,495 --> 00:03:38,328
Damona decides who gets vacation days?

98
00:03:38,497 --> 00:03:40,597
Nah. It's this hard-ass Phil Stockton.

99
00:03:40,966 --> 00:03:42,233
He's the master scheduler.

100
00:03:42,234 --> 00:03:44,701
He manages the schedules
for the entire medical staff.

101
00:03:44,970 --> 00:03:46,035
Then maybe I'll just talk to him.

102
00:03:46,104 --> 00:03:47,437
Doesn't work that way.

103
00:03:47,706 --> 00:03:49,406
Yeah. Nobody in our department
talks to him except for Damona.

104
00:03:49,774 --> 00:03:51,407
She is our liaison.

105
00:03:51,476 --> 00:03:54,043
Well, that seems inefficient...

106
00:03:54,112 --> 00:03:56,212
And unnecessarily French.

107
00:03:57,482 --> 00:03:58,782
You haven't met Phil.

108
00:03:59,050 --> 00:04:00,683
You know Dr. Ken's temper?

109
00:04:00,752 --> 00:04:02,151
Picture that on a man.

110
00:04:03,922 --> 00:04:06,022
That is scary.

111
00:04:06,091 --> 00:04:08,158
One time, Dr. Miller broke protocol

112
00:04:08,426 --> 00:04:11,260
and asked Phil for the day off
for his kid's birthday.

113
00:04:11,329 --> 00:04:12,962
Not only did he not get the day,

114
00:04:13,031 --> 00:04:15,498
but he ended up
having to work on Thanksgiving.

115
00:04:15,567 --> 00:04:18,468
Then, two weeks later, his car blew up.

116
00:04:19,938 --> 00:04:22,772
Fuel-line issue, unrelated, but still!

117
00:04:23,041 --> 00:04:25,508
All right. I won't talk to him.

118
00:04:25,577 --> 00:04:28,878
Damona, would you please ask Phil

119
00:04:28,947 --> 00:04:30,680
if I could have Valentine's day off?

120
00:04:30,749 --> 00:04:31,909
I thought you and Topher broke up.

121
00:04:31,950 --> 00:04:33,116
Oh, no, we did.

122
00:04:33,185 --> 00:04:35,919
But I figure I'll either
be back together with him

123
00:04:35,987 --> 00:04:38,354
or eating myself to death
in his shrubs.

124
00:04:39,691 --> 00:04:42,992
Regardless, I'm gonna need the day.

125
00:04:43,261 --> 00:04:44,527
I'll talk to Phil.

126
00:04:44,596 --> 00:04:46,162
It shouldn't be a problem
since you got it in early.

127
00:04:46,231 --> 00:04:48,131
Yeah, got to keep it timely, people.

128
00:04:48,199 --> 00:04:50,500
That's why I asked
for my days off months ago.

129
00:04:50,501 --> 00:04:51,668
Wait. Which days?

130
00:04:51,937 --> 00:04:54,470
You know, for my new
year's trip to "ha-vai-ee."

131
00:04:54,739 --> 00:04:56,039
Where?

132
00:04:56,107 --> 00:04:58,007
Oh, sweet, contiguous, landlocked Julie.

133
00:04:59,344 --> 00:05:01,711
That's the native pronunciation
of "Hawaii,"

134
00:05:01,780 --> 00:05:03,880
the island paradise where my wife and I

135
00:05:03,948 --> 00:05:05,982
will be enjoying our most relaxed time

136
00:05:06,051 --> 00:05:07,417
since her appendectomy.

137
00:05:07,485 --> 00:05:09,052
And hopefully this time,

138
00:05:09,120 --> 00:05:11,856
she won't be stingy
with the lovin', you know?

139
00:05:11,857 --> 00:05:14,090
"Oh, Ken, watch the stitches!

140
00:05:14,359 --> 00:05:15,258
Ehhhh!

141
00:05:15,327 --> 00:05:17,628
There's another patient in the room!"

142
00:05:17,629 --> 00:05:18,629
Hold up.

143
00:05:18,664 --> 00:05:20,984
Dr. Ken, you didn't tell me
to ask Phil for New Year's off.

144
00:05:22,167 --> 00:05:23,767
Okay, Damona, let's leave the comedy

145
00:05:23,935 --> 00:05:25,486
to the guy who was awarded the mug

146
00:05:25,487 --> 00:05:27,070
that said "World's Funniest Doctor."

147
00:05:27,439 --> 00:05:28,304
Awarded?

148
00:05:28,373 --> 00:05:30,206
You made that yourself at color me mine.

149
00:05:31,910 --> 00:05:33,576
I'm serious, little man.

150
00:05:33,645 --> 00:05:35,145
You never put in a request.

151
00:05:35,213 --> 00:05:36,213
Yes, I did.

152
00:05:36,181 --> 00:05:37,547
I filled it out, I stuck it
in my lab-coat pocket,

153
00:05:38,116 --> 00:05:39,116
and I gave it to you.

154
00:05:39,184 --> 00:05:40,184
You obviously lost it.

155
00:05:40,352 --> 00:05:41,584
If I may?

156
00:05:44,823 --> 00:05:48,258
And not to pile on, but you
did not fill that out, either.

157
00:05:48,526 --> 00:05:51,627
Come on. Allison already
booked the flights to Hawaii.

158
00:05:51,696 --> 00:05:54,664
I thought it was pronounced
"ha-vai-ee."

159
00:05:54,732 --> 00:05:57,066
I think that's just when you're going.

160
00:05:57,135 --> 00:05:58,768
Come on, Damona, please.

161
00:05:58,837 --> 00:06:00,136
I need those days.

162
00:06:00,205 --> 00:06:01,537
Hey, hey, don't put that on me.

163
00:06:01,906 --> 00:06:04,340
It's not my responsibility
to check your damn pocket.

164
00:06:04,341 --> 00:06:05,808
It is actually mine.

165
00:06:05,877 --> 00:06:07,577
I am very sorry, sir.

166
00:06:07,645 --> 00:06:08,645
Okay.

167
00:06:08,680 --> 00:06:11,247
Hey. Trouble in not-paradise?

168
00:06:12,083 --> 00:06:15,051
So, what's the return policy
on that youth-sized snorkel set

169
00:06:15,420 --> 00:06:16,986
you were sure you'd grow into?

170
00:06:24,002 --> 00:06:25,802
Dave, tighten up those arms.

171
00:06:25,870 --> 00:06:27,537
That is your food. Protect it!

172
00:06:29,407 --> 00:06:30,840
What's going on here?

173
00:06:30,909 --> 00:06:33,543
Oh, just preparing Dave
for foster care, you know,

174
00:06:33,611 --> 00:06:35,578
because you and dad
are abandoning us.

175
00:06:37,115 --> 00:06:39,782
Okay, now there's a big kid
trying to take your corn bread.

176
00:06:39,851 --> 00:06:41,184
Quick fork in the eye!

177
00:06:41,252 --> 00:06:43,519
Stay away, Tracy!

178
00:06:44,956 --> 00:06:48,324
Nice try. You're still not coming.

179
00:06:48,393 --> 00:06:51,094
Fine. I didn't want to resort to this.

180
00:06:51,162 --> 00:06:53,096
Dave, plan "b."

181
00:06:58,003 --> 00:06:59,102
Really?

182
00:06:59,170 --> 00:07:00,536
We're supposed to take you guys to Hawaii

183
00:07:00,605 --> 00:07:02,171
because Dave's making a sad face?

184
00:07:04,710 --> 00:07:05,875
Okay, Dave, cut it out.

185
00:07:08,380 --> 00:07:10,346
Oh, baby, are you okay?

186
00:07:11,916 --> 00:07:13,616
Oh, nope. Nope.

187
00:07:13,685 --> 00:07:15,485
Not falling for it.

188
00:07:20,358 --> 00:07:21,591
We'll get there.

189
00:07:21,659 --> 00:07:24,160
Just keep working that money-maker.

190
00:07:26,197 --> 00:07:27,897
Not the fork the face.

191
00:07:35,206 --> 00:07:37,140
Hey, bae.

192
00:07:37,208 --> 00:07:38,648
Guess what I just booked for Hawaii!

193
00:07:39,944 --> 00:07:42,912
A private boat that takes us
to swim with the dolphins.

194
00:07:42,981 --> 00:07:45,048
Then it docks on a secluded beach,

195
00:07:45,116 --> 00:07:48,051
where the two of us are served
a five-star meal at sunset.

196
00:07:48,119 --> 00:07:49,852
They force you to eat at sunset?

197
00:07:49,921 --> 00:07:51,487
I mean, sounds pretty rigid.

198
00:07:51,556 --> 00:07:54,475
Really? 'Cause, to me, it sounds
like the best day of our lives.

199
00:07:54,476 --> 00:07:56,159
The excursion is literally called

200
00:07:56,228 --> 00:07:58,394
"the best day of your life."

201
00:07:58,663 --> 00:08:01,397
Al, Hawaii's great and all,
but I was thinking,

202
00:08:01,466 --> 00:08:03,066
maybe we should stay home.

203
00:08:03,134 --> 00:08:05,635
You know, I think
we're gonna miss the kids.

204
00:08:05,703 --> 00:08:07,837
You son of a bitch.
You didn't get the days off.

205
00:08:07,906 --> 00:08:09,572
No! No! No.

206
00:08:10,876 --> 00:08:12,408
I'm simply opening my heart

207
00:08:12,677 --> 00:08:14,944
about how much
I'm gonna miss our children.

208
00:08:15,013 --> 00:08:16,312
I swear to god.

209
00:08:16,381 --> 00:08:19,348
I planned this whole trip,
and you had one thing to do!

210
00:08:19,417 --> 00:08:20,417
Which I did!

211
00:08:20,485 --> 00:08:21,751
I mean wow.

212
00:08:21,820 --> 00:08:23,886
Oh, wow. Okay.

213
00:08:23,955 --> 00:08:25,721
Uh, this hurts, Allison.

214
00:08:25,790 --> 00:08:28,057
This really hurts.

215
00:08:28,126 --> 00:08:31,928
Ken, I really need this trip.

216
00:08:31,996 --> 00:08:34,464
Please tell me you got the days off.

217
00:08:41,239 --> 00:08:44,474
I got the days off.

218
00:08:44,542 --> 00:08:46,342
Oh, thank god!

219
00:08:47,779 --> 00:08:50,379
I would've been so mad.

220
00:08:50,448 --> 00:08:52,181
I know!

221
00:08:52,250 --> 00:08:54,984
I mean, I only had one thing to do!

222
00:08:55,053 --> 00:08:56,686
Come on!

223
00:08:56,754 --> 00:08:58,721
Oh, my god, this is gonna be so amazing!

224
00:08:58,790 --> 00:09:00,890
Okay, so, are you in
for the dolphin thing?

225
00:09:00,959 --> 00:09:02,091
Oh, I'm in.

226
00:09:02,160 --> 00:09:05,661
I'm in so deep.

227
00:09:05,730 --> 00:09:06,762
Confirm. Confirm.

228
00:09:06,831 --> 00:09:08,331
Non-refundable. Confirm.

229
00:09:08,399 --> 00:09:11,434
Okay, do you want the crème
brulée or the cherries jubilee?

230
00:09:11,503 --> 00:09:13,236
Dealer's choice.

231
00:09:13,304 --> 00:09:14,670
All right. Oh, my god.

232
00:09:14,739 --> 00:09:16,372
Champagne, lobster breakfast.

233
00:09:16,441 --> 00:09:17,507
Should we splurge?

234
00:09:17,575 --> 00:09:20,176
Ooh-hoo! Ah! Yes!

235
00:09:20,245 --> 00:09:22,845
Come on. Come on.

236
00:09:22,914 --> 00:09:24,180
Yolo. Yolo!

237
00:09:24,249 --> 00:09:26,249
‭

238
00:09:26,317 --> 00:09:27,617
Ugh!

239
00:09:31,623 --> 00:09:33,122
I'm officially screwed.

240
00:09:33,191 --> 00:09:36,192
At some point during
our romantic trip to Hawaii,

241
00:09:36,261 --> 00:09:38,594
Allison's gonna notice
I'm not there.

242
00:09:38,663 --> 00:09:41,164
I'm guessing that'll be
the highlight of her trip.

243
00:09:43,168 --> 00:09:45,134
What is this, casual Friday?

244
00:09:45,203 --> 00:09:48,271
No. It's "the attire of places
Ken's not going" Friday.

245
00:09:49,707 --> 00:09:52,942
Next week, I'm dressing as heaven.

246
00:09:53,011 --> 00:09:54,611
I talked to Phil.

247
00:09:54,680 --> 00:09:56,880
- What did he say?
- It's still a big, fat no.

248
00:09:57,349 --> 00:09:58,815
‭but but I have an idea.

249
00:09:58,984 --> 00:10:01,117
Here's a list of all the doctors
that have New Year's off.

250
00:10:00,486 --> 00:10:03,186
Just go and see if any of them
are interested in swapping.

251
00:10:03,255 --> 00:10:04,421
Swapping?

252
00:10:04,490 --> 00:10:07,324
Uh, how do I know
what their wives look like?

253
00:10:07,393 --> 00:10:11,393
Swapping vacation days,
not wives, you dumb bucket.

254
00:10:12,364 --> 00:10:14,264
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah, of course.

255
00:10:14,333 --> 00:10:16,767
You know, Allison's a cool chick
and all... and it has come up...

256
00:10:16,835 --> 00:10:18,502
But that was mostly me
driving it, you know?

257
00:10:18,570 --> 00:10:21,305
I'm gonna go take care of this.

258
00:10:21,373 --> 00:10:24,341
Ah! Morgan's wife's not bad.

259
00:10:26,679 --> 00:10:28,445
Let me get this straight.

260
00:10:28,514 --> 00:10:31,348
You raised this girl, she's a grown woman,

261
00:10:31,417 --> 00:10:34,618
and she can't even
walk down an aisle by herself?

262
00:10:34,687 --> 00:10:36,420
You can go hike a glacier anytime.

263
00:10:36,488 --> 00:10:37,488
Trust me.

264
00:10:37,556 --> 00:10:38,855
They're gonna be around forever.

265
00:10:38,924 --> 00:10:41,058
All I'm saying is, if you schedule it,

266
00:10:41,126 --> 00:10:43,727
you could drop that thing
before the New Year.

267
00:10:43,796 --> 00:10:45,462
That's a huge tax write-off.

268
00:10:47,066 --> 00:10:49,533
Your mom's being difficult.

269
00:10:51,036 --> 00:10:54,805
Congratulations.

270
00:10:57,910 --> 00:10:58,910
Oh, hey, Allison.

271
00:10:58,977 --> 00:11:00,510
What are you doing here?

272
00:11:00,579 --> 00:11:02,379
I came to surprise Ken with lunch.

273
00:11:02,448 --> 00:11:05,349
I brought Hawaiian barbecue...
You know, 'cause of our trip.

274
00:11:05,417 --> 00:11:06,417
So, you're going?

275
00:11:06,485 --> 00:11:08,485
Yeah. Wait, what are you talking about?

276
00:11:08,554 --> 00:11:12,356
Oh. I just thought that since
Ken forgot to ask for the...

277
00:11:12,424 --> 00:11:13,590
Stop talking, Julie.

278
00:11:13,659 --> 00:11:14,958
I can't. I'm too nervous.

279
00:11:15,027 --> 00:11:16,560
Well, then change the subject.

280
00:11:17,396 --> 00:11:18,595
Oh, there he is!

281
00:11:18,664 --> 00:11:21,298
Guess
who's here, Dr. Ken.

282
00:11:21,367 --> 00:11:22,966
Hey, bae. You lied to me.

283
00:11:23,035 --> 00:11:24,167
What?

284
00:11:24,236 --> 00:11:26,603
You never asked for the days off.
I knew it.

285
00:11:26,672 --> 00:11:28,071
Wait. Wait. Just let me explain!

286
00:11:30,743 --> 00:11:32,109
Wow, I did not expect you to stop.

287
00:11:32,177 --> 00:11:33,177
I got nothing.

288
00:11:37,516 --> 00:11:41,516
But you still have b-b-q.

289
00:11:51,397 --> 00:11:53,564
You know what?
I'm not gonna take this.

290
00:11:53,633 --> 00:11:55,566
I'm gonna go dance with the devil.

291
00:11:55,635 --> 00:11:56,834
What does that mean?

292
00:11:56,903 --> 00:11:59,270
Oh, that's just
Dr. Ken's dramatic way of saying

293
00:11:59,338 --> 00:12:01,072
he's gonna fix things with Allison.

294
00:12:01,140 --> 00:12:02,706
No. Allison's not the devil.

295
00:12:02,775 --> 00:12:04,742
Phil is. I'm gonna go talk to him.

296
00:12:04,811 --> 00:12:07,645
I did not get that at all.

297
00:12:07,713 --> 00:12:10,915
Just look in the directory
and find his office, please.

298
00:12:10,983 --> 00:12:12,817
Uh, he is on the 14th floor,

299
00:12:12,885 --> 00:12:15,386
but I think that this is a terrible idea.

300
00:12:15,455 --> 00:12:17,695
I mean, you're talking about
the man who made Dr. O'Brien

301
00:12:17,723 --> 00:12:19,523
work the day after
his own funeral.

302
00:12:20,927 --> 00:12:24,927
Okay. That may have been
an urban legend, but still.

303
00:12:25,932 --> 00:12:28,365
Look, I refuse to live in fear of this guy.

304
00:12:28,434 --> 00:12:30,167
I'm gonna go demand my days,

305
00:12:30,236 --> 00:12:32,636
and I'm not gonna take "no"
for an answer.

306
00:12:32,705 --> 00:12:34,905
I'm not even gonna take "maybe"
for an answer.

307
00:12:34,974 --> 00:12:37,575
Other answers I won't accept
include "I'll think about it"

308
00:12:37,643 --> 00:12:39,009
or "I'll get back to you."

309
00:12:39,078 --> 00:12:40,244
So, just to recap,

310
00:12:40,313 --> 00:12:42,980
I'm looking for "yes,"
"sure," or "definitely."

311
00:12:43,049 --> 00:12:46,984
Or, if need be, I'll even take
a "10-4, good buddy. Gi-gi-gi!"

312
00:12:50,189 --> 00:12:51,489
Good luck, pal.

313
00:12:51,557 --> 00:12:53,624
I will not be rooting for you.

314
00:13:02,201 --> 00:13:03,667
Too much?

315
00:13:05,304 --> 00:13:07,238
Yeah, it's too much.

316
00:13:11,344 --> 00:13:12,576
Hey, anybody seen Dr. Ken?

317
00:13:12,645 --> 00:13:13,677
His 12:00 canceled.

318
00:13:13,746 --> 00:13:15,546
He went upstairs to talk to Phil.

319
00:13:15,615 --> 00:13:16,547
Phil Stockton?

320
00:13:16,616 --> 00:13:18,916
H-he went to talk to Phil Stockton?

321
00:13:18,985 --> 00:13:20,217
I know.

322
00:13:20,286 --> 00:13:22,119
I tried to warn him,
but he seemed very determined.

323
00:13:22,188 --> 00:13:23,888
There's like five or six things

324
00:13:23,956 --> 00:13:26,090
that he is not gonna take
for an answer.

325
00:13:26,159 --> 00:13:27,591
Oh, god, I knew it!

326
00:13:27,660 --> 00:13:28,660
I knew it!

327
00:13:28,728 --> 00:13:29,927
Oh, god! You knew what?!

328
00:13:29,996 --> 00:13:32,229
You knew what?!

329
00:13:32,298 --> 00:13:35,966
Phil Stockton isn't
the master scheduler, okay?

330
00:13:36,035 --> 00:13:37,735
What? Who is?

331
00:13:37,803 --> 00:13:38,836
I am.

332
00:13:40,973 --> 00:13:42,907
Le twist!

333
00:13:44,610 --> 00:13:46,043
But wait.

334
00:13:46,112 --> 00:13:48,379
If you're the master scheduler,
then who's Phil Stockton?

335
00:13:48,447 --> 00:13:50,114
I picked him out of the directory.

336
00:13:50,183 --> 00:13:52,650
He's just some random guy
from environmental services

337
00:13:52,718 --> 00:13:55,119
who's about to be all kinds of confused.

338
00:13:55,188 --> 00:13:57,488
- Phil Stockton?
- Yes?

339
00:13:57,557 --> 00:14:01,557
I'm Dr. Ken Park, and I'm taking
the week of New Year's off.

340
00:14:03,262 --> 00:14:05,563
Okay.

341
00:14:05,631 --> 00:14:06,631
Really?

342
00:14:06,699 --> 00:14:07,939
You're... You're okay with that?

343
00:14:08,000 --> 00:14:09,667
Sure.

344
00:14:09,735 --> 00:14:12,236
Oh, my god.

345
00:14:13,639 --> 00:14:15,139
I'm gonna...

346
00:14:15,208 --> 00:14:17,308
You have no idea what you've done for me.

347
00:14:17,376 --> 00:14:19,810
Not a clue.

348
00:14:19,879 --> 00:14:22,179
See, I lied to my wife,
but then she found out,

349
00:14:22,248 --> 00:14:24,682
and Damona said you
would never... you know what?

350
00:14:24,750 --> 00:14:26,350
I'm gonna do something for you.

351
00:14:26,419 --> 00:14:27,785
Mm-hmm. Here.

352
00:14:27,853 --> 00:14:30,654
This is like a couple hundred bucks.

353
00:14:30,723 --> 00:14:33,257
And this is my saddle burger giddy up card.

354
00:14:33,326 --> 00:14:36,193
Seven barn burgers away
from a free barn burger.

355
00:14:36,262 --> 00:14:37,394
No, I can't take your money.

356
00:14:37,463 --> 00:14:38,796
Oh, no, I insist.

357
00:14:38,864 --> 00:14:41,098
You take it 'cause you are a Saint.

358
00:14:41,167 --> 00:14:42,433
What are you doing?

359
00:14:43,769 --> 00:14:45,903
Ohh. We don't have to do this.

360
00:14:45,972 --> 00:14:47,171
I love you, man.

361
00:14:47,240 --> 00:14:49,106
Thanks.

362
00:14:57,116 --> 00:15:00,751
Well, I just had an interesting
conversation with Phil,

363
00:15:00,820 --> 00:15:02,386
the master scheduler.

364
00:15:02,455 --> 00:15:04,221
Uh, um, what did... what did he say?

365
00:15:04,290 --> 00:15:06,590
He said...

366
00:15:06,659 --> 00:15:07,958
Whoa. Hang on.

367
00:15:08,027 --> 00:15:09,962
Hey, Al, I got the days!

368
00:15:09,963 --> 00:15:11,596
Dr. Ken! No! No!

369
00:15:11,664 --> 00:15:13,064
No! No! No, I'm serious. I talked
to the master scheduler.

370
00:15:13,133 --> 00:15:14,365
Dr. Ken, I... Ah, ah, ah, ah!

371
00:15:15,769 --> 00:15:17,101
Oh, I know.

372
00:15:17,170 --> 00:15:19,210
I-I am so sorry about the lying
and the up and back,

373
00:15:19,272 --> 00:15:21,906
but you can relax now
'cause we're going to Hawaii!

374
00:15:21,975 --> 00:15:24,208
I know!
I feel the same way!

375
00:15:24,277 --> 00:15:25,543
And you know what, Al?

376
00:15:25,612 --> 00:15:27,311
Screw it. Let's bring the kids.

377
00:15:27,380 --> 00:15:28,880
I don't even... wait. Wait.

378
00:15:28,948 --> 00:15:30,214
Oh, wait. Another call.

379
00:15:30,283 --> 00:15:31,482
"Chello"?

380
00:15:31,551 --> 00:15:33,351
Hang up the damn phone!

381
00:15:34,788 --> 00:15:36,287
I'm the master scheduler.

382
00:15:36,356 --> 00:15:37,855
You don't have the days!

383
00:15:39,225 --> 00:15:41,058
Oh, honey, I-I-I got to go.

384
00:15:41,127 --> 00:15:43,661
It's an emergency. It's a code maroon... 5.

385
00:15:45,965 --> 00:15:47,665
What the hell is going on?

386
00:15:47,734 --> 00:15:49,500
You're the master scheduler?

387
00:15:49,569 --> 00:15:52,003
Why would you even mess with me like that?

388
00:15:52,071 --> 00:15:54,338
Okay, look, four years ago, when
they made me office manager,

389
00:15:54,407 --> 00:15:57,141
they dumped the scheduling job
on me, and...

390
00:15:57,210 --> 00:15:59,744
I liked it 'cause I was helping people.

391
00:15:59,813 --> 00:16:01,779
You like helping people?

392
00:16:01,848 --> 00:16:04,382
I like helping people.

393
00:16:04,450 --> 00:16:07,752
I just don't like people to know
I like helping people

394
00:16:07,821 --> 00:16:09,787
'cause then people
want you to help them.

395
00:16:11,057 --> 00:16:14,325
So... I made up an alter ego.

396
00:16:14,394 --> 00:16:16,594
Like Bruce Wayne has Batman.

397
00:16:17,764 --> 00:16:21,764
So, in this scenario, she's a
rich dude with a leather fetish?

398
00:16:23,503 --> 00:16:25,469
Because that's intriguing.

399
00:16:29,242 --> 00:16:32,877
Hey, did I not give him the long
weekend for his dad's birthday?

400
00:16:32,946 --> 00:16:35,213
And you're gonna be kissing
or stalking your boyfriend

401
00:16:35,281 --> 00:16:36,747
on Valentine's Day 'cause of me.

402
00:16:36,816 --> 00:16:39,617
Thanks, either way.

403
00:16:39,686 --> 00:16:41,886
And what about when you needed
those three days

404
00:16:41,955 --> 00:16:42,955
to mourn Joan Rivers?

405
00:16:43,022 --> 00:16:44,188
Three days?

406
00:16:44,257 --> 00:16:46,224
Hey, she paved the way
for so many comediennes!

407
00:16:46,292 --> 00:16:47,491
I mean, without her,

408
00:16:47,560 --> 00:16:49,760
there's no rudner,
there's no poundstone.

409
00:16:49,829 --> 00:16:51,863
You know what? I'm sorry.
Please go on.

410
00:16:51,931 --> 00:16:55,666
It doesn't even matter
because every once in a while,

411
00:16:55,735 --> 00:16:59,735
I can't help somebody I really
want to help, and it sucks.

412
00:16:59,873 --> 00:17:02,540
Look, Damona, it's not your fault.

413
00:17:02,609 --> 00:17:04,909
I mean, am I gonna
blame you publicly for it?

414
00:17:04,978 --> 00:17:06,010
Absolutely.

415
00:17:07,380 --> 00:17:09,680
My wife's gonna hate me.
My kids are gonna hate me.

416
00:17:09,749 --> 00:17:11,649
I mean, the only one
who doesn't hate me

417
00:17:11,718 --> 00:17:13,451
is some boob in environmental services

418
00:17:13,519 --> 00:17:16,988
who I just gave 200 bucks to...
And my giddyup card!

419
00:17:18,558 --> 00:17:21,559
Environmental services!
That's it!

420
00:17:21,628 --> 00:17:22,860
Wait for me.

421
00:17:22,929 --> 00:17:26,929
Not a lot of patients got seen today.

422
00:17:29,636 --> 00:17:30,835
Hey, Phil.

423
00:17:30,904 --> 00:17:32,837
Damona Watkins,
fifth-floor office manager.

424
00:17:32,906 --> 00:17:34,238
Ken Park.

425
00:17:34,307 --> 00:17:36,841
We hugged recently,
and there may have been a kiss.

426
00:17:36,910 --> 00:17:39,343
Oh, I'm certain there was.

427
00:17:39,712 --> 00:17:43,712
You took my money,
my giddyup card, and my heart.

428
00:17:45,917 --> 00:17:48,351
- You done?
‭- Yep.

429
00:17:50,220 --> 00:17:52,721
So, Phil, your department's
closing the building

430
00:17:52,789 --> 00:17:53,789
for four days in march
to fumigate.

431
00:17:53,858 --> 00:17:54,790
Am I right?

432
00:17:54,759 --> 00:17:55,759
Oh, yeah.

433
00:17:55,093 --> 00:17:56,993
We call it
the "Pestic-ides of March."

434
00:17:57,062 --> 00:18:00,830
We like to have fun up here.

435
00:18:00,899 --> 00:18:03,066
Well, look,
my friend is in a bind.

436
00:18:03,135 --> 00:18:04,834
I really want to help him.

437
00:18:04,903 --> 00:18:07,604
So, why don't you move it
to New Year's week?

438
00:18:07,673 --> 00:18:10,040
Oof. That's a lot of departments
to coordinate.

439
00:18:10,108 --> 00:18:12,042
Well, you best get
to coordinatin', son!

440
00:18:12,110 --> 00:18:13,243
My bad. You got this.

441
00:18:14,780 --> 00:18:17,314
I'm sorry. I-I-I don't think
I can swing it.

442
00:18:17,382 --> 00:18:18,648
Let me ask you a question.

443
00:18:18,717 --> 00:18:20,483
Doesn't Jeff Scarborough
schedule your vacation days?

444
00:18:20,552 --> 00:18:21,918
That's right.

445
00:18:21,987 --> 00:18:23,887
Well, I just talked
to my good friend Jeff,

446
00:18:23,956 --> 00:18:26,089
and he told me you like
to take a week off in July

447
00:18:26,158 --> 00:18:27,624
to go fishing with your family.

448
00:18:27,693 --> 00:18:31,194
Man, I'd sure hate to see that go away.

449
00:18:31,263 --> 00:18:33,396
Yeah, boy-ee!

450
00:18:34,666 --> 00:18:37,467
You mean his trip, not his family, right?

451
00:18:37,536 --> 00:18:41,404
I, uh... I guess I...
Could move some things around.

452
00:18:41,473 --> 00:18:45,075
Yeah. You do that, Phil,
or say goodbye to your family.

453
00:18:46,211 --> 00:18:47,510
Could... could you just go...

454
00:18:47,579 --> 00:18:49,012
Okay. It wasn't clear.
No, I didn't... I didn't know...

455
00:18:49,081 --> 00:18:50,847
I mean, I didn't know if
it was the trip or his family...

456
00:18:50,916 --> 00:18:51,948
Phil.

457
00:18:52,017 --> 00:18:53,316
It was the trip, right?

458
00:18:54,519 --> 00:18:56,519
Thank you so much.
You saved my ass.

459
00:18:56,588 --> 00:18:58,521
Oh, it's all good.

460
00:18:58,590 --> 00:19:00,223
- So, how do you know Jeff Scarborough?
- I don't.

461
00:19:00,292 --> 00:19:03,860
Aw, you stone-cold!

462
00:19:08,333 --> 00:19:09,666
How did it go?

463
00:19:09,735 --> 00:19:10,735
Mnh...

464
00:19:10,802 --> 00:19:12,736
Trip's back on.

465
00:19:12,804 --> 00:19:14,004
Aah!

466
00:19:14,072 --> 00:19:16,573
And Christmas came early
to Welltopia that year.

467
00:19:18,543 --> 00:19:20,310
Poi, anyone? Ken, come on.

468
00:19:20,379 --> 00:19:22,679
This might be as close as you get.

469
00:19:22,748 --> 00:19:23,748
Relax, pat.

470
00:19:23,782 --> 00:19:25,648
I'm going to "ha-vai-ee" after all.

471
00:19:25,717 --> 00:19:26,950
Damn it!

472
00:19:27,019 --> 00:19:29,252
I got three gallons
of prank poi in my office

473
00:19:29,321 --> 00:19:32,022
and the entire first season
of "Magnum, P.I."

474
00:19:33,258 --> 00:19:35,525
I was gonna slip it into your car.

475
00:19:35,594 --> 00:19:38,528
Well, the poi, that is,
not the "Magnum, P.I."

476
00:19:38,597 --> 00:19:39,996
No, the "Magnum, P.I."

477
00:19:40,065 --> 00:19:43,566
I was gonna broadcast
on the side of your house.

478
00:19:45,771 --> 00:19:49,272
Okay, look, we're the only ones
who know Damona's secret,

479
00:19:49,341 --> 00:19:50,861
and we're gonna keep that way, I mean,

480
00:19:50,909 --> 00:19:53,176
'cause she's always taken care of us,

481
00:19:53,245 --> 00:19:55,378
and we're gonna take care of her.

482
00:19:55,447 --> 00:19:57,113
Absolutely. She's Batman.

483
00:19:57,182 --> 00:19:59,649
Damn straight I'm Batman.

484
00:19:59,718 --> 00:20:03,119
I guess that makes me the joker, huh?

485
00:20:03,188 --> 00:20:05,055
Huh? The...

486
00:20:12,172 --> 00:20:15,106
Oh, my god, this was so worth it.

487
00:20:15,175 --> 00:20:16,607
Ahh, I know.

488
00:20:17,844 --> 00:20:20,511
Sorry. I'm a little ticklish.

489
00:20:21,715 --> 00:20:23,514
I really needed this.

490
00:20:23,583 --> 00:20:26,451
Gregory, your fingers are magic.

491
00:20:26,519 --> 00:20:29,253
Dave, can you please be quiet?

492
00:20:29,322 --> 00:20:32,357
Sorry. I didn't mean to ruin
our couple's massage.

493
00:20:32,426 --> 00:20:33,358
It's four people.

494
00:20:33,427 --> 00:20:35,994
It is not a couple's massage.

495
00:20:36,563 --> 00:20:40,128
I know, but Gregory's hands
are making me stupid.