1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:03,760
It's only right that the boys
say a proper goodbye to their dad.

2
00:00:03,800 --> 00:00:06,200
How many people have coupled
in the back of a hearse

3
00:00:06,240 --> 00:00:09,240
and lived to tell the tale?
- Well, if you put it like that...

4
00:00:15,080 --> 00:00:17,240
I reckon we've been burgled.

5
00:00:19,480 --> 00:00:22,280
♪ What'll I do

6
00:00:22,320 --> 00:00:27,560
♪ When you are far away?

7
00:00:28,360 --> 00:00:33,560
♪ And I am blue, what'll I do?

8
00:00:35,640 --> 00:00:38,320
♪ When I'm alone

9
00:00:38,360 --> 00:00:44,080
♪ With only dreams of you

10
00:00:44,120 --> 00:00:47,760
♪ That won't come true

11
00:00:47,800 --> 00:00:50,440
♪ What'll I do? ♪

12
00:01:03,440 --> 00:01:05,680
I didn't think today
could get any worse.

13
00:01:05,720 --> 00:01:09,400
First the funeral, then this.
It's left me completely empty.

14
00:01:09,440 --> 00:01:11,440
Like my bedroom.

15
00:01:13,040 --> 00:01:15,000
And the Old Bill weren't much help.

16
00:01:15,040 --> 00:01:17,080
Well, of course they weren't.

17
00:01:17,120 --> 00:01:20,200
As far as they're concerned,
we're criminal scum,

18
00:01:20,240 --> 00:01:23,640
just because 30-odd years ago,
Darryl and Chris

19
00:01:23,680 --> 00:01:25,480
got into a little spot of bother.

20
00:01:25,520 --> 00:01:29,480
Involving sawn-off shotguns
and security vans.

21
00:01:29,520 --> 00:01:33,080
Don't get cocky, Dor, they were
looking at you funny, too.

22
00:01:33,120 --> 00:01:35,240
Yeah, well, probably
just star struck.

23
00:01:36,760 --> 00:01:38,600
Don't kid yourself.

24
00:01:38,640 --> 00:01:41,440
When they get back to the nick,
they'll be looking you up

25
00:01:41,480 --> 00:01:43,680
in their Boys' Bumper Book
of Suspects.

26
00:01:43,720 --> 00:01:46,840
I have never broken the law
in my life!

27
00:01:46,880 --> 00:01:50,720
No? I'd say strumping a gangster
in the back of a runaway hearse

28
00:01:50,760 --> 00:01:53,000
might be a teeny bit illegal.

29
00:01:54,040 --> 00:01:55,840
Possibly.

30
00:01:55,880 --> 00:01:58,640
But it will make a spectacular
finale to my new book,

31
00:01:58,680 --> 00:02:01,280
and no horses were harmed
in the making.

32
00:02:03,560 --> 00:02:05,520
- Sharon.
- Yeah?

33
00:02:05,560 --> 00:02:08,320
Are you sure you didn't leave
your bedroom window open

34
00:02:08,360 --> 00:02:11,600
when we went out?
- Don't start all that again, Trace.

35
00:02:11,640 --> 00:02:15,720
If I had, there wouldn't be broken
glass all over my floor, would there?

36
00:02:15,760 --> 00:02:18,160
Only you do tend to
leave your window open.

37
00:02:18,200 --> 00:02:20,280
Only because you tell me
to leave it open.

38
00:02:20,320 --> 00:02:22,240
Only because your room stinks.

39
00:02:25,120 --> 00:02:27,240
I wouldn't say stinks.

40
00:02:27,280 --> 00:02:29,320
I would.

41
00:02:29,360 --> 00:02:32,440
I'm amazed those burglars
weren't knocked unconscious.

42
00:02:33,200 --> 00:02:35,400
- If you're gonna get catty...
- Catty?

43
00:02:35,440 --> 00:02:37,960
I'm the one that's lost most
around here!

44
00:02:38,920 --> 00:02:41,280
Some of my handbags
were museum quality.

45
00:02:42,200 --> 00:02:44,240
Like their owner.

46
00:02:45,920 --> 00:02:48,600
I bet your mate Lenny
had something to do with this.

47
00:02:48,640 --> 00:02:52,080
He was so keen to arrange a big
funeral to get us out of the house.

48
00:02:52,120 --> 00:02:54,720
Oh, everything's my fault, isn't it?

49
00:02:54,760 --> 00:02:56,720
Well, now you come to mention it,
yes.

50
00:02:57,600 --> 00:03:01,480
Mrs Finch says we can keep
the chairs till her next seance.

51
00:03:01,520 --> 00:03:03,480
Oh, bless her.

52
00:03:03,520 --> 00:03:05,440
Did she see anything suspicious?

53
00:03:05,480 --> 00:03:09,080
No, but she's gonna have a word
with her spirit guide.

54
00:03:09,120 --> 00:03:11,880
Who is Ray Charles,
so don't hold your breath.

55
00:03:14,200 --> 00:03:17,320
She did say she thought she heard
the window breaking, though.

56
00:03:17,360 --> 00:03:19,920
See.
But she must be confused,

57
00:03:19,960 --> 00:03:22,520
because she reckons
that was after we got home.

58
00:03:28,400 --> 00:03:31,680
Yeah, well, she lost the plot
years ago, didn't she?

59
00:03:31,720 --> 00:03:34,560
Boys, can you do me a favour?
Can you run down the corner shop

60
00:03:34,600 --> 00:03:37,200
and get something for dinner?
- I can defrost something.

61
00:03:37,240 --> 00:03:39,600
- You can't, they stole the microwave.
- Just go.

62
00:03:43,000 --> 00:03:45,160
You broke your own window,
didn't you?

63
00:03:48,240 --> 00:03:50,240
Well?

64
00:03:50,280 --> 00:03:52,520
I had no choice, Trace!

65
00:03:55,120 --> 00:03:57,800
I was afraid that the insurance
wouldn't pay up

66
00:03:57,840 --> 00:04:00,200
if they knew
that the window was left open.

67
00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:02,600
I mean, it weren't easy, either.

68
00:04:02,640 --> 00:04:08,000
I had to run up the stairs while you
was down here effing and blinding.

69
00:04:08,040 --> 00:04:11,520
Then I had to hang out the window
so that when I smashed it,

70
00:04:11,560 --> 00:04:13,520
all the glass would fall
on the inside.

71
00:04:14,600 --> 00:04:18,680
Because everyone knows
if the glass had gone outside,

72
00:04:18,720 --> 00:04:21,920
the police would have twigged
it was an inside job.

73
00:04:23,240 --> 00:04:25,400
What do you want, a medal?

74
00:04:26,800 --> 00:04:28,800
A thank you would be nice.

75
00:04:32,800 --> 00:04:35,800
All my sovereigns,
my ruby-encrusted watch,

76
00:04:35,840 --> 00:04:39,000
my gold gate bracelet your dad
gave me for our silver wedding.

77
00:04:39,040 --> 00:04:41,160
I cleaned up all the glass, Trace,

78
00:04:41,200 --> 00:04:44,360
and that toilet the copper used
without lifting the seat.

79
00:04:45,560 --> 00:04:48,800
You're so lucky those dozy sods
didn't catch on, Shal.

80
00:04:48,840 --> 00:04:51,440
- Can I have my dinner now, Trace?
- All right.

81
00:04:51,480 --> 00:04:53,480
Garthy?

82
00:04:53,520 --> 00:04:56,360
- Now, mind out, it's very hot.
- OK, OK, I've got it.

83
00:04:56,400 --> 00:04:58,400
Cheers. Thank you.

84
00:04:59,400 --> 00:05:01,600
- Sharon.
- What?

85
00:05:01,640 --> 00:05:04,480
I was gonna say 'be careful,
you'll melt my table'.

86
00:05:16,520 --> 00:05:18,600
It's not my day, is it?

87
00:05:21,360 --> 00:05:24,440
- Is that your list for the insurance?
- Yep.

88
00:05:24,480 --> 00:05:26,680
They take much of yours, Aunty Shal?

89
00:05:26,720 --> 00:05:28,720
No, not really.

90
00:05:28,760 --> 00:05:34,360
Just my Picasso and my signed picture
of Pope John Paul II,

91
00:05:34,400 --> 00:05:37,440
and the ruby slippers I bought
at a car boot sale.

92
00:05:39,600 --> 00:05:41,600
They didn't take anything, actually.

93
00:05:41,640 --> 00:05:43,600
Lucky old you.

94
00:05:43,640 --> 00:05:46,360
Lucky? Lucky, Trace?

95
00:05:46,400 --> 00:05:48,800
It's pathetic.

96
00:05:48,840 --> 00:05:51,360
At least you had something
worth stealing.

97
00:05:52,200 --> 00:05:56,200
One of them left a... souvenir
in my knicker drawer.

98
00:05:58,000 --> 00:05:59,920
Filthy animal.

99
00:05:59,960 --> 00:06:01,840
I hope you cleaned it up.

100
00:06:01,880 --> 00:06:03,840
No, this.

101
00:06:05,680 --> 00:06:07,800
Obviously felt sorry for me.

102
00:06:08,640 --> 00:06:11,600
- How much was that leather jacket they nicked?
- 350.

103
00:06:11,640 --> 00:06:15,040
- Plus having my name put on the back.
- I'll call it 500, then.

104
00:06:16,040 --> 00:06:19,240
- Mum, that's 30 quid a letter.
- But they used loads of studs.

105
00:06:19,280 --> 00:06:21,320
Sounds like Dorien.

106
00:06:22,880 --> 00:06:25,080
Well, at least
you can replace yours,

107
00:06:25,120 --> 00:06:28,360
your brother's lost his laptop with
all his school stuff on it.

108
00:06:28,400 --> 00:06:32,120
- But it's all backed up so...
so no worries.
- No worries?

109
00:06:32,160 --> 00:06:35,080
- I bought you that for your 18th.
- Yeah, but it...

110
00:06:35,120 --> 00:06:37,640
Weren't only school stuff on it,
was it, bruv?

111
00:06:40,000 --> 00:06:42,040
See you later, Mum.

112
00:06:43,240 --> 00:06:45,640
Oh, I like the new look, Dor,

113
00:06:45,680 --> 00:06:47,720
can't see your face at all.

114
00:06:49,800 --> 00:06:51,800
What's all that?

115
00:06:51,840 --> 00:06:56,040
Receipts, photographs,
valuations of everything I own.

116
00:06:56,080 --> 00:06:59,200
I tried adding it up,
but my calculator blew a fuse.

117
00:07:00,320 --> 00:07:02,160
Well, why are you telling us?

118
00:07:02,200 --> 00:07:04,320
So you can add it to the claim,
of course.

119
00:07:04,360 --> 00:07:06,880
Your insurance broker's
in for a bit of a shock.

120
00:07:06,920 --> 00:07:09,520
There'll be Lloyd's Names
leaping out of high windows

121
00:07:09,560 --> 00:07:11,600
all across the Square Mile.

122
00:07:15,760 --> 00:07:19,160
What is it?
You haven't let the policy lapse?

123
00:07:19,200 --> 00:07:22,320
- Of course not, I'm not stupid.
- Oh, thank God.

124
00:07:23,880 --> 00:07:25,880
Then, what?

125
00:07:25,920 --> 00:07:29,040
Well, the thing is, Dor,
this is a family policy.

126
00:07:29,080 --> 00:07:31,120
Yes, so?

127
00:07:32,080 --> 00:07:34,120
So you're not family.

128
00:07:37,280 --> 00:07:39,320
What?!

129
00:07:39,360 --> 00:07:42,000
- I'm sorry, Dor.
- You're sorry?

130
00:07:42,040 --> 00:07:44,760
- Well, I thought you'd have
your own policy.
- Why would I?

131
00:07:44,800 --> 00:07:48,040
I live here, I pay my way,
unlike some people called Sharon.

132
00:07:49,520 --> 00:07:51,600
Well, doesn't that make me family?

133
00:07:51,640 --> 00:07:54,160
Well, family are the people
you have to take care of,

134
00:07:54,200 --> 00:07:56,320
even if they don't
make a contribution,

135
00:07:56,360 --> 00:08:00,120
and quite frankly get on your
Brad Pitts most of the time.

136
00:08:00,160 --> 00:08:02,200
Exactly.

137
00:08:05,440 --> 00:08:08,200
Well, I am not taking this
lying down!

138
00:08:08,240 --> 00:08:10,240
There's a novelty.

139
00:08:11,720 --> 00:08:13,640
Oh!

140
00:08:20,680 --> 00:08:22,720
Have you come to take the mickey,
too?

141
00:08:22,760 --> 00:08:25,160
- Can I come in? Depends.
- You got a search warrant?

142
00:08:25,200 --> 00:08:27,040
Oh, be fair, Tracey.

143
00:08:27,080 --> 00:08:29,640
It's Mrs Stubbs to you,
Detective Sergeant Farmer.

144
00:08:29,680 --> 00:08:31,680
Please? Mrs Stubbs?

145
00:08:35,760 --> 00:08:38,240
Look, I'm here as a friend,
not as a copper.

146
00:08:38,280 --> 00:08:40,960
Where'd you get the idea
we're friends?

147
00:08:41,000 --> 00:08:45,320
Oh, have the boys in blue
made a brilliant breakthrough?

148
00:08:45,360 --> 00:08:47,720
In a manner of speaking, yeah.

149
00:08:47,760 --> 00:08:51,440
Look, can I have a private word,
Tr... Mrs Stubbs?

150
00:08:51,480 --> 00:08:54,760
No, whatever you've got to say,
you can say in front of Sharon.

151
00:08:54,800 --> 00:08:56,760
If you say so.

152
00:08:58,640 --> 00:09:01,600
This was the sitting room,
until they took the seats.

153
00:09:02,680 --> 00:09:04,720
Didn't leave much, did they?

154
00:09:04,760 --> 00:09:08,400
Well, that detective training
wasn't a complete waste of time (!)

155
00:09:09,360 --> 00:09:13,200
Look, I know people think we don't
give burglary cases a high priority.

156
00:09:13,240 --> 00:09:17,600
Priority? Those coppers didn't
even notice the broken window.

157
00:09:18,840 --> 00:09:21,200
I had to point it out to them.

158
00:09:22,360 --> 00:09:24,280
Oh, no, they spotted it, all right.

159
00:09:24,320 --> 00:09:26,360
They're not quite as stupid
as they look.

160
00:09:26,400 --> 00:09:29,680
Well, one of them isn't, anyway.
Of course, there's no law against

161
00:09:29,720 --> 00:09:32,440
breaking your own window, Sharon,
it's a free country.

162
00:09:32,480 --> 00:09:35,320
But there is a law against
falsifying an insurance claim

163
00:09:35,360 --> 00:09:37,600
for pecuniary advantage.

164
00:09:37,640 --> 00:09:39,720
Is pecuniary the same as money?

165
00:09:39,760 --> 00:09:42,480
- Yeah.
- I was afraid you'd say that.

166
00:09:45,520 --> 00:09:49,040
You moron, Sharon!
You complete waste of space!

167
00:09:49,080 --> 00:09:52,720
- What were you thinking?
- She wasn't thinking, she doesn't think.

168
00:09:52,760 --> 00:09:56,400
She functions on an instinctual
level, like our ape cousins.

169
00:09:57,640 --> 00:09:59,480
Now I can't claim for anything!

170
00:09:59,520 --> 00:10:02,400
We'll be sitting on garden chairs
and eating out of tin cans

171
00:10:02,440 --> 00:10:04,360
until we drop dead of hypothermia

172
00:10:04,400 --> 00:10:06,640
because they stole all the bedding,
too!

173
00:10:06,680 --> 00:10:09,080
Well, now you know how I feel,
Tracey.

174
00:10:09,120 --> 00:10:11,000
Look, can I say something?

175
00:10:11,040 --> 00:10:12,880
No!

176
00:10:12,920 --> 00:10:15,600
There's nothing you can say,
there's nothing you can do.

177
00:10:15,640 --> 00:10:18,000
I can, Trace, I can fix it.

178
00:10:18,040 --> 00:10:20,160
Like you fixed that window?

179
00:10:21,320 --> 00:10:23,240
I can talk to Lenny.

180
00:10:23,280 --> 00:10:26,560
I'm not having some sleazy villain
recover my possessions.

181
00:10:26,600 --> 00:10:29,200
So what are you gonna do,
hire a private dick?

182
00:10:31,880 --> 00:10:33,920
Wouldn't be the first time.

183
00:10:44,900 --> 00:10:46,860
Hello, girls.

184
00:10:46,900 --> 00:10:49,220
I never knew you were friends
of the green baize?

185
00:10:49,260 --> 00:10:52,020
Shall I rack them up?
I ain't in the mood for snooker.

186
00:10:52,060 --> 00:10:53,860
Billiards?

187
00:10:53,900 --> 00:10:55,780
You know why we're here, Len.

188
00:10:56,860 --> 00:10:58,740
The burglary.

189
00:10:58,780 --> 00:11:02,340
Oh, yeah, I heard, I'm very sorry.

190
00:11:02,380 --> 00:11:04,380
Is that a confession?

191
00:11:04,420 --> 00:11:06,940
You don't think I had anything
to do with it, do you?

192
00:11:06,980 --> 00:11:11,740
Well, be fair, Len,
you are in the removals business.

193
00:11:11,780 --> 00:11:13,860
Ah, but I've got an alibi,
haven't I?

194
00:11:13,900 --> 00:11:18,380
I was at a funeral, with you two.

195
00:11:18,420 --> 00:11:22,100
I told you, he's as useful
as a sniffer dog with hay fever.

196
00:11:25,340 --> 00:11:27,980
And I thought you still liked me,
Lenny.

197
00:11:29,820 --> 00:11:31,820
- Yeah?
- Mmm.

198
00:11:33,020 --> 00:11:36,140
I'll tell you what I'll do,
I'll put the word about.

199
00:11:36,180 --> 00:11:38,980
Now, don't you worry,
on my nan's eyes,

200
00:11:39,020 --> 00:11:41,180
I'll find the chancers
who robbed you.

201
00:11:41,220 --> 00:11:44,820
And then there may well be
another funeral.

202
00:11:44,860 --> 00:11:46,980
That's very Christian of you.

203
00:11:48,100 --> 00:11:50,300
Anything for you, Sharon.

204
00:11:50,340 --> 00:11:53,500
Now, you just go home,
and leave it to Lenny.

205
00:11:55,380 --> 00:11:57,660
- No time like the present, 'ey, Len?
- What?

206
00:11:57,700 --> 00:12:00,580
Oh. Yeah, course, yeah.
I'll put the feelers out.

207
00:12:03,420 --> 00:12:05,420
Use it and lose it.

208
00:12:28,420 --> 00:12:30,500
You're Foxy Cohen, aren't you?

209
00:12:30,540 --> 00:12:32,620
I've just been reading about you.

210
00:12:32,660 --> 00:12:35,220
You sure you're in the right
sort of pawnshop?

211
00:12:36,220 --> 00:12:38,100
Quite sure.

212
00:12:38,140 --> 00:12:40,820
Now... have you got anything
like this?

213
00:12:40,860 --> 00:12:43,860
Hmm. It's a bit out of my league.

214
00:12:43,900 --> 00:12:47,220
Yeah. This is Romford Market,
not Rodeo Drive.

215
00:12:47,260 --> 00:12:50,860
Ah, that would explain
the lack of Kardashians, then.

216
00:12:52,660 --> 00:12:55,740
If you're looking for a bit of
class, I've got a lovely necklace

217
00:12:55,780 --> 00:12:59,260
and earrings, cubic zirconiums,
but you'd never tell the difference.

218
00:12:59,300 --> 00:13:04,620
I'm not buying, I'm hunting
for my stolen possessions.

219
00:13:04,660 --> 00:13:08,300
Oh.
Well, what are you asking me for?

220
00:13:08,340 --> 00:13:10,340
- Aren't you a trellis?
- Trellis?

221
00:13:11,780 --> 00:13:15,820
Someone who deals
in stolen property.

222
00:13:15,860 --> 00:13:18,020
You mean fence.

223
00:13:18,060 --> 00:13:21,580
Yes, well, it's all the same thing,
isn't it?

224
00:13:21,620 --> 00:13:25,140
Sorry, none of this shmutter's
crossed my counter.

225
00:13:25,180 --> 00:13:29,820
And you know what, Foxy... this is
really a job for the police.

226
00:13:29,860 --> 00:13:31,780
The police?

227
00:13:31,820 --> 00:13:33,820
They couldn't find their own
backsides

228
00:13:33,860 --> 00:13:36,420
with both hands
in a brightly lit room!

229
00:13:39,020 --> 00:13:40,940
Oh, well.

230
00:13:40,980 --> 00:13:42,900
I need a result, Lenny.

231
00:13:42,940 --> 00:13:45,180
Tracey's doing my head in.

232
00:13:47,340 --> 00:13:50,500
I was just talking to Lenny,
he says he's getting warmer.

233
00:13:50,540 --> 00:13:53,340
Maybe he should take that stupid
tank top off, then.

234
00:13:53,380 --> 00:13:55,460
We just bumped into Mrs Finch.

235
00:13:55,500 --> 00:13:57,500
Oh, does she want her chairs back
yet?

236
00:13:57,540 --> 00:13:59,780
No. But she's had a word
with Ray Charles

237
00:13:59,820 --> 00:14:04,100
and he thinks we should be looking
for 'a man who's not a man'.

238
00:14:05,100 --> 00:14:08,300
Great advice from a clairvoyant
who's not a clairvoyant.

239
00:14:11,980 --> 00:14:14,060
Ooh, no.

240
00:14:16,260 --> 00:14:18,620
Oh, God.

241
00:14:35,660 --> 00:14:37,620
Hello?

242
00:14:37,660 --> 00:14:39,460
All right.

243
00:14:39,500 --> 00:14:41,380
Look, slow down, I can't understand.

244
00:14:41,420 --> 00:14:43,460
It's Dorien,
she's all out of breath.

245
00:14:43,500 --> 00:14:45,420
I don't want to know why.

246
00:14:46,620 --> 00:14:48,500
Give us it here.

247
00:14:48,540 --> 00:14:50,460
Yes, Dor?

248
00:14:51,660 --> 00:14:53,660
That's fantastic!

249
00:14:54,460 --> 00:14:57,580
She's in Romford Market
and she's got a lead.

250
00:14:57,620 --> 00:14:59,660
She's buying a dog?

251
00:15:01,660 --> 00:15:03,700
We're on our way, Dor.

252
00:15:11,540 --> 00:15:13,860
- Where is he, then?
- Inside, I imagine.

253
00:15:13,900 --> 00:15:16,620
- You imagine?
- I saw him go in,
I didn't dare follow him,

254
00:15:16,660 --> 00:15:19,220
not on my own.
- You'd recognise him again, though?

255
00:15:19,260 --> 00:15:22,540
I won't forget that evil criminal
sneer if I live to be 100.

256
00:15:22,580 --> 00:15:25,460
Well, that gives us a year
to catch him (!)

257
00:15:25,500 --> 00:15:27,460
Come on, then.

258
00:15:46,660 --> 00:15:48,900
Look, maybe you should go home now,
love.

259
00:15:48,940 --> 00:15:51,780
Mum, I'm 18.
I'm as straight as the next man!

260
00:15:51,820 --> 00:15:53,900
Have you seen the next man?

261
00:15:55,100 --> 00:15:58,020
Good evening, Theydon Bois...

262
00:15:59,100 --> 00:16:01,260
...and girls.

263
00:16:01,300 --> 00:16:04,220
And those of you who are
still deciding.

264
00:16:04,260 --> 00:16:07,300
Welcome to our world famous
talent night!

265
00:16:07,340 --> 00:16:09,260
Well, I say world famous,

266
00:16:09,300 --> 00:16:11,740
they've definitely heard of us
in Billericay.

267
00:16:11,780 --> 00:16:16,020
- Now, first up.
- Up, up, up, up, up, up!

268
00:16:16,060 --> 00:16:18,340
All the way from Queen's Park,

269
00:16:18,380 --> 00:16:22,700
I present the one, the only
Poxy Cohen!

270
00:16:32,180 --> 00:16:34,540
- That's him!
- Are you sure?

271
00:16:34,580 --> 00:16:37,860
Yes, he's wearing my
diamond 'D' necklace!

272
00:16:37,900 --> 00:16:41,300
- Hello, Essex!
- Hello, Poxy!

273
00:16:41,340 --> 00:16:45,540
Did you all enjoy my first book,
Sixty Shades of Green?

274
00:16:47,500 --> 00:16:50,900
Good. Well, I'm working on a
follow-up, Seventy Shades of Puce!

275
00:16:52,540 --> 00:16:55,060
Here she goes.

276
00:16:55,100 --> 00:16:56,900
Come on, everyone, party with Poxy.

277
00:16:58,100 --> 00:17:01,100
♪ Now there was a time

278
00:17:01,140 --> 00:17:03,900
♪ When they used to say

279
00:17:04,980 --> 00:17:08,700
♪ That behind every great man

280
00:17:08,740 --> 00:17:11,500
♪ There has to be a great woman ♪

281
00:17:12,460 --> 00:17:14,420
Oh!

282
00:17:14,460 --> 00:17:16,620
Oh, my God. Oh, my God! Oh, my God!

283
00:17:16,660 --> 00:17:19,540
It's the real Foxy Cohen!

284
00:17:20,780 --> 00:17:22,980
On stage with me!

285
00:17:23,020 --> 00:17:26,740
I can't believe it.
Boys and girls, this is -

286
00:17:26,780 --> 00:17:30,660
Yes, this is the real Foxy Cohen.

287
00:17:33,180 --> 00:17:35,420
But the only thing real
about this imposter

288
00:17:35,460 --> 00:17:40,300
are the clothes and the jewellery
that he has stolen from me!

289
00:17:40,980 --> 00:17:44,620
They're not stolen, I got them
from a junk shop in Ilford.

290
00:17:46,580 --> 00:17:48,540
How dare you! That's my necklace.

291
00:17:50,620 --> 00:17:52,420
Go on, Dor!

292
00:17:55,420 --> 00:17:57,180
Ray Charles was right.

293
00:17:57,980 --> 00:17:59,900
Maybe we should rescue her!

294
00:17:59,940 --> 00:18:01,900
Come on, boys!

295
00:18:01,940 --> 00:18:03,740
Just get off me, you...

296
00:18:03,780 --> 00:18:05,540
you...

297
00:18:06,780 --> 00:18:08,780
Stop! Stop it.

298
00:18:08,820 --> 00:18:11,340
You're making a show of yourselves,
stop it.

299
00:18:27,580 --> 00:18:30,980
Cheers, boys. If you just put it
over there for now. Thank you.

300
00:18:32,020 --> 00:18:34,940
- Ain't you going to be hot in that indoors?
- Doesn't matter.

301
00:18:34,980 --> 00:18:36,940
I'm never taking it off again.

302
00:18:37,940 --> 00:18:39,780
I'm sorry I doubted you, Barry.

303
00:18:39,820 --> 00:18:41,660
Well, once you tracked down Poxy -

304
00:18:41,700 --> 00:18:43,860
Did your job for you, you mean.

305
00:18:43,900 --> 00:18:46,300
...the whole case broke wide open.

306
00:18:46,340 --> 00:18:49,380
In fact, there's only one thing
we haven't been able to recover.

307
00:18:49,420 --> 00:18:51,780
- My laptop?
- Sharon's Picasso.

308
00:18:53,780 --> 00:18:55,780
C'est la vie.

309
00:18:56,980 --> 00:18:59,060
Here you go, son.

310
00:18:59,100 --> 00:19:01,420
Well, say thank you.

311
00:19:02,620 --> 00:19:04,660
Er... thanks.

312
00:19:06,060 --> 00:19:08,260
Don't worry,
your secret's safe with me.

313
00:19:09,700 --> 00:19:12,540
But every single episode
of Countryfile?

314
00:19:12,580 --> 00:19:14,540
Weird.

315
00:19:34,700 --> 00:19:36,700
First floor.

316
00:19:37,900 --> 00:19:40,060
Second bedroom on the left.

317
00:19:42,500 --> 00:19:44,500
(Yes!)

318
00:19:44,540 --> 00:19:46,460
I'm going upstairs.

319
00:19:46,500 --> 00:19:48,500
I may be some time.

320
00:19:53,660 --> 00:19:55,700
As good as my word, Shal.

321
00:19:59,380 --> 00:20:01,260
What's all this, Len?

322
00:20:01,300 --> 00:20:03,740
Rag and bone men
don't usually deliver.

323
00:20:03,780 --> 00:20:05,900
Well, it's furniture, innit?

324
00:20:05,940 --> 00:20:07,900
Loosely speaking.

325
00:20:07,940 --> 00:20:09,780
Yes, but it's not mine.

326
00:20:09,820 --> 00:20:13,020
I know that, Trace, but the South
London underworld is shut up

327
00:20:13,060 --> 00:20:15,180
tighter than a nun's naughty bits.

328
00:20:16,140 --> 00:20:18,660
So me and the lads,
we had a bit of a whip round.

329
00:20:19,740 --> 00:20:22,180
And that's the best
you could come up with?

330
00:20:22,220 --> 00:20:25,420
You've missed the bus, Lenny.
We've recovered everything.

331
00:20:25,460 --> 00:20:27,300
- In North London.
- No!

332
00:20:27,340 --> 00:20:29,500
Well, what am I going to do
with all that tat?

333
00:20:31,500 --> 00:20:34,020
Put it back.

334
00:20:34,060 --> 00:20:36,060
Well, duty calls.

335
00:20:36,100 --> 00:20:38,340
Thanks, Barry, I owe you one.

336
00:20:38,380 --> 00:20:40,420
Oh, yeah?
What are you doing Tuesday?

337
00:20:41,540 --> 00:20:43,380
Not a lot.

338
00:20:43,420 --> 00:20:45,500
Oh, fancy a coffee, then?

339
00:20:45,540 --> 00:20:47,580
That'd be lovely.

340
00:20:47,620 --> 00:20:49,540
All right.

341
00:20:51,860 --> 00:20:53,860
- Come on, you.
- Yep, OK.

342
00:20:57,860 --> 00:21:01,100
As it happens, Shal,
I reckon you owe me one, too.

343
00:21:01,140 --> 00:21:04,140
I mean, after all, I did
come through for you, didn't I?

344
00:21:05,420 --> 00:21:07,660
I wouldn't put it quite like that,
Lenny.

345
00:21:08,580 --> 00:21:11,220
What were you expecting, exactly?

346
00:21:11,260 --> 00:21:14,740
Well, I'll let you decide that,
darling.

347
00:21:16,260 --> 00:21:19,540
How about a little something
out of my knicker drawer?

348
00:21:22,140 --> 00:21:24,220
Well, now you're talking.

349
00:21:25,700 --> 00:21:28,220
There you go.
Don't go spending it all at once.

350
00:21:33,420 --> 00:21:35,420
Subtitles by Deluxe