1
00:00:03,330 --> 00:00:05,339
Here's a fun Postal fact.
2
00:00:05,363 --> 00:00:07,573
Yeah, the inside of our mailbox
3
00:00:07,597 --> 00:00:09,345
is under federal jurisdiction.
4
00:00:09,369 --> 00:00:11,415
So, if you broke
my right thumb,
5
00:00:11,439 --> 00:00:13,196
that's Pasadena city police.
6
00:00:13,220 --> 00:00:15,081
But if you broke
my left thumb,
7
00:00:15,105 --> 00:00:16,663
that's the FBI.
8
00:00:18,232 --> 00:00:20,693
If I'm going to jail, I'm killing him,
not breaking his thumb.
9
00:00:20,717 --> 00:00:22,001
No.
10
00:00:22,292 --> 00:00:24,768
Oh, I got a letter
from my Meemaw.
11
00:00:25,190 --> 00:00:26,469
Umm. Smell this.
12
00:00:27,541 --> 00:00:28,259
What is that?
13
00:00:28,351 --> 00:00:30,989
Uh, roses, bengay,
and Dr. Schools' foot powder.
14
00:00:31,937 --> 00:00:34,209
Yeah, "Grandma",
by Calvin Klein.
15
00:00:36,325 --> 00:00:38,256
Yeah, the last time I got
a hand written letter,
16
00:00:38,280 --> 00:00:41,453
it was from someone who told me
I parked like a blind person.
17
00:00:41,477 --> 00:00:43,024
That someone has a name.
18
00:00:43,048 --> 00:00:44,721
Uh, thank you.
19
00:00:46,581 --> 00:00:48,631
Oh, Meemaw got
a new set of teeth.
20
00:00:49,881 --> 00:00:51,625
Oh, but then
she found her old ones.
21
00:00:52,895 --> 00:00:55,241
Oh, so now the new ones are
just gonna be her church teeth.
22
00:00:57,287 --> 00:00:59,213
Fun. Like your
Comic-Con Spock ears
23
00:00:59,237 --> 00:01:01,136
and your around
the house Spock ears.
24
00:01:03,502 --> 00:01:05,391
I park fine!
25
00:01:08,282 --> 00:01:10,082
Oh, my goodness,
she's coming to visit!
26
00:01:10,084 --> 00:01:12,518
Oh, it'll be nice
to finally meet her.
27
00:01:12,520 --> 00:01:14,286
Oh, you are going
to love her.
28
00:01:14,288 --> 00:01:17,089
She is the kindest, sweetest
woman you'll ever meet.
29
00:01:17,091 --> 00:01:19,992
Yeah, unless you're a gopher
digging up her vegetable garden.
30
00:01:21,162 --> 00:01:22,395
In that case, you can expect
31
00:01:22,397 --> 00:01:25,731
to have your head bashed in
with a shovel.
32
00:01:25,733 --> 00:01:29,368
♪ Our whole universe
was in a hot, dense state ♪
33
00:01:29,370 --> 00:01:32,705
♪ Then nearly 14 billion years
ago expansion started... Wait! ♪
34
00:01:32,707 --> 00:01:34,340
♪ The Earth began to cool ♪
35
00:01:34,342 --> 00:01:36,876
♪ The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools ♪
36
00:01:36,878 --> 00:01:39,545
♪ We built the Wall ♪
♪ We built the pyramids ♪
37
00:01:39,547 --> 00:01:42,214
♪ Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery ♪
38
00:01:42,216 --> 00:01:44,116
♪ That all started
with a big bang ♪
39
00:01:44,118 --> 00:01:46,066
♪ Bang! ♪
40
00:01:46,067 --> 00:01:48,067
♪ The Big Bang Theory 9x14 ♪
The Empathy Optimization
Original Air Date on February 4,
41
00:01:48,068 --> 00:01:50,068
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man
42
00:01:51,617 --> 00:01:53,884
That's not her.
That's not her.
43
00:01:53,886 --> 00:01:56,320
That's not her.
That's not her.
44
00:01:56,322 --> 00:01:58,322
That's not her.
45
00:01:58,324 --> 00:02:00,490
That's not her.
That's not her.
46
00:02:00,492 --> 00:02:02,359
That's not her.
Really?
47
00:02:02,361 --> 00:02:04,561
The old Asian man
is not your Meemaw?
48
00:02:06,332 --> 00:02:08,232
And that's not helpful.
49
00:02:09,201 --> 00:02:11,134
You know, I-I got her
an iPhone for Christmas.
50
00:02:11,136 --> 00:02:12,603
I'll see where she is.
51
00:02:12,605 --> 00:02:13,804
Oh, that's nice.
52
00:02:13,806 --> 00:02:15,806
Most people her age
don't embrace technology.
53
00:02:15,808 --> 00:02:17,541
Oh, no, she doesn't
even know she has it.
54
00:02:17,543 --> 00:02:19,643
No, I had my sister
slip it in her bag
55
00:02:19,645 --> 00:02:23,413
so that I can track her
like a sea turtle.
56
00:02:23,415 --> 00:02:25,849
Same as when we lost you
at the zoo.
57
00:02:25,851 --> 00:02:27,718
Uh, for the hundredth time,
58
00:02:27,720 --> 00:02:30,087
I smelled kettle corn
and couldn't find the cart.
59
00:02:31,257 --> 00:02:32,489
Still doesn't explain
60
00:02:32,491 --> 00:02:35,726
how you ended up
on the freeway divider.
61
00:02:35,728 --> 00:02:37,828
Moon Pie!
62
00:02:37,830 --> 00:02:39,029
Meemaw!
63
00:02:39,031 --> 00:02:41,064
I'm so happy to see you!
64
00:02:41,066 --> 00:02:42,366
I'm happy to
see you, too!
65
00:02:42,368 --> 00:02:43,600
Oh.
66
00:02:43,602 --> 00:02:44,868
You got even smaller.
67
00:02:44,870 --> 00:02:46,403
I love it!
68
00:02:46,405 --> 00:02:48,405
Uh, Meemaw, this is Leonard.
69
00:02:48,407 --> 00:02:49,406
Leonard, this is my Meemaw.
70
00:02:49,408 --> 00:02:50,674
Hi. So nice
to finally meet you.
71
00:02:50,676 --> 00:02:52,242
Let me take this
for you, Meemaw.
72
00:02:52,244 --> 00:02:53,410
Thank you.
73
00:02:53,412 --> 00:02:55,412
No. Oh, no.
Now you call her “Constance.”
74
00:02:55,414 --> 00:02:56,880
I call her “Meemaw.”
75
00:02:56,882 --> 00:02:58,148
You have your own Meemaw.
76
00:02:58,150 --> 00:03:00,117
It's not my fault
she died when you were four.
77
00:03:01,220 --> 00:03:04,187
Is that nice to say
to your friend?
78
00:03:04,189 --> 00:03:06,089
It isn't, Meemaw.
79
00:03:06,091 --> 00:03:08,258
Sorry, Leonard.
80
00:03:09,495 --> 00:03:11,928
Can you please
live with us forever?
81
00:03:11,930 --> 00:03:14,298
Oh.
82
00:03:15,467 --> 00:03:17,067
That's ridiculous!
If you had
83
00:03:17,069 --> 00:03:19,536
a superpower,
and spent your whole life
84
00:03:19,538 --> 00:03:21,238
being told to suppress it,
85
00:03:21,240 --> 00:03:23,674
when you finally decide
to embrace that power,
86
00:03:23,676 --> 00:03:25,909
why hide in isolation?!
87
00:03:25,911 --> 00:03:27,344
I'm sorry,
88
00:03:27,346 --> 00:03:30,981
and how much money did
your version of Frozen make?!
89
00:03:32,117 --> 00:03:33,684
I'm just saying,
90
00:03:33,686 --> 00:03:35,352
instead of “Let it Go,”
she should really sing,
91
00:03:35,354 --> 00:03:37,654
“Look At Me Hiding in a Freezer
Like a Dove Bar.”
92
00:03:38,590 --> 00:03:41,224
She built an ice castle,
made a snow monster
93
00:03:41,226 --> 00:03:44,227
and gave herself
a complete makeover in one day.
94
00:03:44,229 --> 00:03:45,929
You know what I saw
you do today?
95
00:03:45,931 --> 00:03:48,398
Eat a block of cream cheese
straight from the foil
96
00:03:48,400 --> 00:03:50,901
and lie about it to your wife!
97
00:03:52,604 --> 00:03:54,338
Sorry for eavesdropping,
but did you know
98
00:03:54,340 --> 00:03:56,973
they actually had
the song “Let It Go” in place
99
00:03:56,975 --> 00:03:58,608
before they finalized the story?
100
00:03:58,610 --> 00:04:01,044
Yeah, that's true. In fact,
they liked the song so much,
101
00:04:01,046 --> 00:04:02,646
they retooled
the whole script around it.
102
00:04:02,648 --> 00:04:04,581
Which is probably
why that movie sucks.
103
00:04:04,583 --> 00:04:06,817
Here we are
talking about Frozen,
104
00:04:06,819 --> 00:04:08,218
and yet, you got burned.
105
00:04:08,220 --> 00:04:10,354
Miss, I'm so sorry.
106
00:04:10,356 --> 00:04:11,822
How can you not like that movie?
107
00:04:11,824 --> 00:04:13,824
I just think it gets more credit
than it deserves.
108
00:04:13,826 --> 00:04:15,325
Oh, that's what I said
an hour ago.
109
00:04:15,327 --> 00:04:19,096
Wow. You've been talking
about Frozen for an hour?
110
00:04:20,132 --> 00:04:23,500
You should've seen us
after The Good Dinosaur.
111
00:04:23,502 --> 00:04:27,337
It was a classic western
set in the post-Jurassic period,
112
00:04:27,339 --> 00:04:30,006
and it changed my life.
113
00:04:33,812 --> 00:04:35,312
Are you comfortable?
114
00:04:35,314 --> 00:04:37,013
Very.
115
00:04:37,015 --> 00:04:37,948
It's nice to rest
116
00:04:37,950 --> 00:04:40,517
after 800 flights of stairs.
117
00:04:42,888 --> 00:04:45,889
You were so cute,
huffin' and puffin'.
118
00:04:47,126 --> 00:04:48,658
There's Amy.
119
00:04:48,660 --> 00:04:50,327
I just know
you're gonna hit it off.
120
00:04:50,329 --> 00:04:53,063
You both have
the same fashion sense.
121
00:04:54,032 --> 00:04:57,734
Hello! Come in,
say hi to my Meemaw.
122
00:04:57,736 --> 00:04:59,202
Hi. Nice to meet you.
123
00:04:59,204 --> 00:05:00,737
Nice to meet you, too.
124
00:05:00,739 --> 00:05:01,738
How was your trip?
125
00:05:01,740 --> 00:05:02,806
Wonderful.
126
00:05:02,808 --> 00:05:04,541
And the pilot did
such a good job,
127
00:05:04,543 --> 00:05:06,243
I gave him a butterscotch.
128
00:05:06,245 --> 00:05:08,211
That's great.
129
00:05:08,213 --> 00:05:10,647
And look at you,
sitting in Sheldon's spot.
130
00:05:10,649 --> 00:05:12,249
You know, I don't
even get to sit there.
131
00:05:12,251 --> 00:05:13,483
Yeah.
132
00:05:13,485 --> 00:05:15,185
And you never will.
133
00:05:15,187 --> 00:05:18,021
Ooh, hey, oh, ask her to do the
tissue thing.
134
00:05:18,023 --> 00:05:19,189
Do it, ask her.
135
00:05:20,392 --> 00:05:21,525
Can I have a tissue?
136
00:05:21,527 --> 00:05:22,926
Of course.
137
00:05:25,731 --> 00:05:26,930
Isn't that the best?!
138
00:05:26,932 --> 00:05:29,099
She's like Grandma Spider-Man.
139
00:05:30,102 --> 00:05:31,802
He's been saying that
140
00:05:31,804 --> 00:05:33,103
since he was little.
141
00:05:33,105 --> 00:05:35,605
I still don't know
what it means.
142
00:05:35,607 --> 00:05:37,808
Oh, well, you two sit down
and get to know each other.
143
00:05:37,810 --> 00:05:39,075
I'll get your room ready.
144
00:05:39,077 --> 00:05:40,544
Oh, now don't you go
looking through
145
00:05:40,546 --> 00:05:42,379
my suitcase for presents.
146
00:05:42,381 --> 00:05:43,847
If I did, would I find any?
147
00:05:43,849 --> 00:05:45,081
Maybe.
148
00:05:45,083 --> 00:05:48,919
But you also might find
my brassieres and bloomers.
149
00:05:49,955 --> 00:05:52,823
That's a risk
I'm willing to take!
150
00:05:52,825 --> 00:05:54,357
Well, this is so nice.
151
00:05:54,359 --> 00:05:56,293
He's so excited
to have you here and...
152
00:05:56,295 --> 00:05:59,296
Okay, now let's you and me
get something straight.
153
00:05:59,298 --> 00:06:03,099
He may think that I came
to bake him cookies,
154
00:06:03,101 --> 00:06:05,969
but the real reason
is to size you up.
155
00:06:05,971 --> 00:06:08,171
S-S...
156
00:06:08,173 --> 00:06:09,973
Si-Size me up?
157
00:06:09,975 --> 00:06:12,676
Sheldon's mother may be
okay with you,
158
00:06:12,678 --> 00:06:14,444
but I'm not so easy.
159
00:06:14,446 --> 00:06:16,179
Well, I-I'm...
160
00:06:16,181 --> 00:06:19,382
I'm sure you'll like me
once you get to know me.
161
00:06:19,384 --> 00:06:21,585
Oh, you better hope so.
162
00:06:22,988 --> 00:06:25,589
A Texas Special cattle
and calf car train set
163
00:06:25,591 --> 00:06:27,157
with authentic horn and bell!
164
00:06:27,159 --> 00:06:28,458
Thank you, Meemaw!
165
00:06:28,460 --> 00:06:29,960
Oh, you're welcome, Moon Pie.
166
00:06:29,962 --> 00:06:31,228
Amy, why don't you
167
00:06:31,230 --> 00:06:32,329
look excited?
168
00:06:32,331 --> 00:06:34,431
Well, you get
to watch me play with this!
169
00:06:38,270 --> 00:06:40,570
Oh, I see you're reading Saga.
170
00:06:40,572 --> 00:06:42,639
Yeah, I hear it's pretty good.
171
00:06:42,641 --> 00:06:45,542
It is, and not a lot of comics
have a woman with wings
172
00:06:45,544 --> 00:06:48,078
breastfeeding a baby
right on the cover.
173
00:06:48,080 --> 00:06:50,547
I'll take your word for it.
174
00:06:50,549 --> 00:06:51,548
You should.
175
00:06:51,550 --> 00:06:53,917
He's really looked.
176
00:06:54,887 --> 00:06:57,387
I'm Raj, by the way.
177
00:06:57,389 --> 00:06:58,989
This is Howard.
Hi.
178
00:06:58,991 --> 00:07:00,423
Claire.
179
00:07:00,425 --> 00:07:02,359
Well, I've seen you here before,
Claire.
180
00:07:02,361 --> 00:07:03,860
It's my first time.
181
00:07:03,862 --> 00:07:06,496
I'm looking for inspiration
for this movie I'm writing.
182
00:07:06,498 --> 00:07:07,764
You're a screenwriter?
183
00:07:07,766 --> 00:07:11,001
Well, screenwriter,
slash bartender,
184
00:07:11,003 --> 00:07:14,704
slash, a month away
from living in my car.
185
00:07:14,706 --> 00:07:17,240
Yeah, I get that.
186
00:07:17,242 --> 00:07:18,675
I'm a scientist,
187
00:07:18,677 --> 00:07:20,076
slash party planner,
188
00:07:20,078 --> 00:07:22,078
slash small-dog enthusiast,
189
00:07:22,080 --> 00:07:23,880
slash...
190
00:07:23,882 --> 00:07:27,050
guy who probably should have
stopped at “scientist.”
191
00:07:27,052 --> 00:07:28,952
You're really a scientist?
192
00:07:28,954 --> 00:07:30,053
Well, astrophysicist.
193
00:07:30,055 --> 00:07:31,421
That's perfect.
194
00:07:31,423 --> 00:07:34,090
Do you think I could pick your
brain for my movie some time?
195
00:07:34,092 --> 00:07:35,859
It's animated sci-fi for kids.
196
00:07:35,861 --> 00:07:37,861
Sure. I love animated movies.
He does,
197
00:07:37,863 --> 00:07:40,664
and he has the Lilo & Stitch
collector plates to prove it.
198
00:07:42,467 --> 00:07:45,335
Excuse me for wanting
a little magic in my life.
199
00:07:46,672 --> 00:07:47,971
Here's my number.
200
00:07:47,973 --> 00:07:49,272
Give me a call,
we'll get together.
201
00:07:49,274 --> 00:07:51,141
Yeah, great.
See ya.
202
00:07:51,143 --> 00:07:53,043
Yeah, bye.
203
00:07:53,045 --> 00:07:54,344
What are you doing?
204
00:07:54,346 --> 00:07:55,679
You have a girlfriend.
205
00:07:55,681 --> 00:07:57,347
So?
So,
206
00:07:57,349 --> 00:07:58,715
how do you think she'd feel
207
00:07:58,717 --> 00:08:01,651
about you helping a beautiful
girl with her screenplay?
208
00:08:01,653 --> 00:08:03,153
I wouldn't say
she's beautiful.
209
00:08:03,155 --> 00:08:05,488
Really? You don't think
she's attractive?
210
00:08:05,490 --> 00:08:08,325
I do. I just wouldn't
tell my girlfriend.
211
00:08:11,096 --> 00:08:13,730
Constance, are you sure
I can't pour you some wine?
212
00:08:13,732 --> 00:08:15,699
Oh, no wine for me.
213
00:08:15,701 --> 00:08:19,369
Sheldon's bringing me
my whiskey.
214
00:08:19,371 --> 00:08:21,571
Here you go, Meemaw.
I made it
215
00:08:21,573 --> 00:08:22,672
just how you like...
216
00:08:22,674 --> 00:08:24,741
a lot in a glass.
217
00:08:24,743 --> 00:08:27,510
Thank you, Moon Pie.
218
00:08:27,512 --> 00:08:28,712
Um, curious.
219
00:08:28,714 --> 00:08:31,081
Why do you call Sheldon
“Moon Pie?”
220
00:08:31,083 --> 00:08:33,183
'Cause he's so nummy-nummy.
221
00:08:33,185 --> 00:08:35,085
She could just eat him up.
222
00:08:35,854 --> 00:08:38,254
And I call her “Meemaw”"
223
00:08:38,256 --> 00:08:40,256
because, well, just,
well, look at her.
224
00:08:41,593 --> 00:08:43,526
It's interesting that
225
00:08:43,528 --> 00:08:46,363
Leonard and Penny know
about his nickname
226
00:08:46,365 --> 00:08:47,597
and you don't.
227
00:08:47,599 --> 00:08:49,799
Oh, well, you know,
228
00:08:49,801 --> 00:08:52,235
now-now that I'm hearing it,
it does sound familiar.
229
00:08:52,237 --> 00:08:53,436
How could it?
230
00:08:53,438 --> 00:08:55,772
I never told you,
and you never bothered to ask.
231
00:08:55,774 --> 00:08:57,807
Well, now I know.
Yeah.
232
00:09:00,012 --> 00:09:02,445
So, Penny, I understand
you have a new job.
233
00:09:02,447 --> 00:09:03,513
Yes.
234
00:09:03,515 --> 00:09:04,781
I'm a pharmaceutical
sales rep.
235
00:09:04,783 --> 00:09:06,116
Oh.
236
00:09:06,118 --> 00:09:09,653
It's so wonderful that
you modern gals can have it all.
237
00:09:10,555 --> 00:09:12,922
A husband
and a full-time career.
238
00:09:12,924 --> 00:09:16,092
I have a relationship
and a full-time career, too.
239
00:09:16,094 --> 00:09:18,795
That doesn't bode well.
240
00:09:21,433 --> 00:09:24,534
Why not? You-you just said
it's okay for her to work.
241
00:09:24,536 --> 00:09:28,338
Well, Leonard doesn't need as
much tending to as Sheldon does.
242
00:09:28,340 --> 00:09:29,439
And as Moon Pie explained,
243
00:09:29,441 --> 00:09:32,042
Leonard's work
244
00:09:32,044 --> 00:09:34,411
is more of a hobby.
245
00:09:35,881 --> 00:09:37,781
That's my best friend.
246
00:09:37,783 --> 00:09:39,015
Yeah.
247
00:09:39,017 --> 00:09:40,417
Look,
248
00:09:40,419 --> 00:09:42,352
I-I get that you're protective
of your grandson,
249
00:09:42,354 --> 00:09:44,387
but he's an adult now.
250
00:09:44,389 --> 00:09:48,024
Maybe I understand what he needs
better than you do.
251
00:09:48,026 --> 00:09:50,527
I appreciate your honesty, dear.
252
00:09:50,529 --> 00:09:52,429
Thank you.
And here's
253
00:09:52,431 --> 00:09:53,763
some more honesty:
254
00:09:53,765 --> 00:09:56,499
I don't like you very much.
255
00:09:58,236 --> 00:09:59,836
Well, maybe I don't
like you either.
256
00:09:59,838 --> 00:10:01,104
No, no, no, no, no,
257
00:10:01,106 --> 00:10:03,373
no, no, no. Y-You have
to like each other.
258
00:10:03,375 --> 00:10:06,342
Well, we have a 4:30 reservation
at Applebee's.
259
00:10:08,547 --> 00:10:10,547
I think I should leave.
260
00:10:10,549 --> 00:10:12,015
But why?
261
00:10:12,017 --> 00:10:13,616
Other than
you two fighting,
262
00:10:13,618 --> 00:10:16,286
we're having such a good time.
263
00:10:16,288 --> 00:10:19,022
The minute you left the room,
your precious meemaw
264
00:10:19,024 --> 00:10:20,924
started giving me
a really hard time.
265
00:10:20,926 --> 00:10:22,292
I don't need this.
266
00:10:22,294 --> 00:10:23,293
Let her go.
267
00:10:23,295 --> 00:10:25,228
And under no circumstance
268
00:10:25,230 --> 00:10:28,031
will you give her
that engagement ring.
269
00:10:29,201 --> 00:10:30,166
What ring?
270
00:10:30,168 --> 00:10:32,869
Maybe we should give
them some privacy.
271
00:10:32,871 --> 00:10:33,937
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
272
00:10:33,939 --> 00:10:35,905
You go ahead.
I'll catch up with you.
273
00:10:38,143 --> 00:10:40,343
You have
an engagement ring?
274
00:10:40,345 --> 00:10:42,378
Yes.
275
00:10:43,215 --> 00:10:45,682
Penny, did you know
about this?
276
00:10:45,684 --> 00:10:47,550
All right, let's go.
277
00:10:55,200 --> 00:10:57,734
When did you get
an engagement ring?
278
00:10:57,736 --> 00:10:58,902
My mother gave it to me,
279
00:10:58,904 --> 00:11:00,971
and I had been thinking
about giving it to you,
280
00:11:00,973 --> 00:11:02,439
but then we broke up.
281
00:11:02,441 --> 00:11:04,040
Well, thank goodness
for that.
282
00:11:04,042 --> 00:11:06,176
Sheldon, will you please tell
your grandmother
283
00:11:06,178 --> 00:11:07,577
to stay out of this?
284
00:11:07,579 --> 00:11:09,980
Oh, I don't think
I could do that.
285
00:11:09,982 --> 00:11:11,715
Sheldon, tell this girl
286
00:11:11,717 --> 00:11:14,651
that my ring will never be
on her finger.
287
00:11:14,653 --> 00:11:16,019
Y...
288
00:11:16,021 --> 00:11:19,222
I'm gonna opt out
of that one, too.
289
00:11:19,224 --> 00:11:21,825
Who said I even want
to be engaged to him?
290
00:11:21,827 --> 00:11:23,693
And if I do, I-I don't need
your hand-me-downs!
291
00:11:23,695 --> 00:11:24,694
All right, all right!
292
00:11:24,696 --> 00:11:25,896
Look, l-let's all...
293
00:11:25,898 --> 00:11:27,264
let's remain calm
294
00:11:27,266 --> 00:11:28,565
and analyze this situation.
295
00:11:28,567 --> 00:11:30,767
Now, I realize that
you've only known each other
296
00:11:30,769 --> 00:11:31,935
for less than a day,
297
00:11:31,937 --> 00:11:34,738
but is it possible this
crankiness is because
298
00:11:34,740 --> 00:11:36,573
your cycles have synced?
299
00:11:36,575 --> 00:11:38,475
You leave the room
300
00:11:38,477 --> 00:11:40,343
and let the grown-ups talk.
301
00:11:40,345 --> 00:11:41,511
Now.
302
00:11:41,513 --> 00:11:44,447
Don't speak to him
like he's a child.
303
00:11:44,449 --> 00:11:47,918
Thank you. I'm gonna go next
door and play with Leonard.
304
00:11:51,390 --> 00:11:53,557
Okay, so you met this girl,
you exchanged numbers,
305
00:11:53,559 --> 00:11:54,991
and you're gonna
meet up with her.
306
00:11:54,993 --> 00:11:56,626
Just to help her
with her screenplay.
307
00:11:56,628 --> 00:11:58,528
Oh. Well,
I guess that's not so bad.
308
00:11:58,530 --> 00:11:59,563
You weren't there.
309
00:11:59,565 --> 00:12:00,797
He was really flirting.
310
00:12:00,799 --> 00:12:03,733
Hey, it's not my fault
if American women project
311
00:12:03,735 --> 00:12:05,135
their fantasies on foreigners
312
00:12:05,137 --> 00:12:08,939
with the kind of magical voice
that grants wishes.
313
00:12:08,941 --> 00:12:11,074
I'm sure it was harmless.
314
00:12:11,076 --> 00:12:12,442
People flirt. No big deal.
315
00:12:12,444 --> 00:12:14,411
Really? So it's
okay if I fl...
316
00:12:14,413 --> 00:12:16,580
Not you. I own your ass.
317
00:12:17,850 --> 00:12:20,784
The real question is,
where are you with Emily?
318
00:12:20,786 --> 00:12:22,652
Uh, it's hard to say.
319
00:12:22,654 --> 00:12:24,688
I think we're good,
but things like this
320
00:12:24,690 --> 00:12:27,157
make me wonder if Emily's
really the right person for me.
321
00:12:27,159 --> 00:12:29,226
I mean, did you guys ever have
doubts about each other?
322
00:12:29,228 --> 00:12:31,561
No. Never.
Absolutely.
323
00:12:31,563 --> 00:12:32,696
What?
324
00:12:32,698 --> 00:12:33,897
Howie, you forget
325
00:12:33,899 --> 00:12:35,232
how much of our early dates
326
00:12:35,234 --> 00:12:36,366
involved you doing magic
327
00:12:36,368 --> 00:12:38,068
and me doing this.
328
00:12:39,805 --> 00:12:41,371
Fine.
329
00:12:41,373 --> 00:12:43,506
I had reservations
about you, too.
330
00:12:43,508 --> 00:12:44,307
No, you didn't.
331
00:12:44,309 --> 00:12:45,909
No, I didn't.
332
00:12:45,911 --> 00:12:47,811
Well, it doesn't matter now,
333
00:12:47,813 --> 00:12:49,813
'cause I love
how things worked out.
334
00:12:49,815 --> 00:12:50,947
Me, too.
335
00:12:50,949 --> 00:12:52,849
And I think you're
even more beautiful
336
00:12:52,851 --> 00:12:55,051
than this rose.
337
00:13:00,325 --> 00:13:03,293
Wow. The last time
I saw my grandma,
338
00:13:03,295 --> 00:13:04,728
the most exciting thing
was watching the ash
339
00:13:04,730 --> 00:13:06,496
of her cigarette get longer
and wondering
340
00:13:06,498 --> 00:13:09,199
if it was gonna fall
in her pudding.
341
00:13:09,201 --> 00:13:10,934
Did it?
342
00:13:10,936 --> 00:13:11,935
Yeah, right in there.
343
00:13:11,937 --> 00:13:13,670
She ate it and everything.
344
00:13:13,672 --> 00:13:15,906
Leonard and Penny.
345
00:13:15,908 --> 00:13:17,641
Leonard and Penny.
Leonard and Penny.
346
00:13:17,643 --> 00:13:19,009
Come in!
347
00:13:19,011 --> 00:13:20,310
Hey. What happened?
348
00:13:20,312 --> 00:13:21,511
Is Amy gone?
349
00:13:21,513 --> 00:13:23,246
No. They asked me to leave
350
00:13:23,248 --> 00:13:24,981
so they could speak privately.
351
00:13:24,983 --> 00:13:26,883
Uh-oh.
Yeah, I know. It was quite tense.
352
00:13:26,885 --> 00:13:29,552
So here's
the million dollar question:
353
00:13:29,554 --> 00:13:33,290
uh, who wants to pop over there
and get my trains?
354
00:13:36,094 --> 00:13:38,094
All right.
I've made up my mind.
355
00:13:38,096 --> 00:13:39,930
I'm gonna do the right thing,
call this girl,
356
00:13:39,932 --> 00:13:41,765
and let her know
that I'm in a relationship.
357
00:13:41,767 --> 00:13:42,899
Okay, so far we've heard,
358
00:13:42,901 --> 00:13:44,801
“made up my mind,
I'm dumping Emily.”
359
00:13:44,803 --> 00:13:46,536
“Made up my mind
to date both of them
360
00:13:46,538 --> 00:13:49,472
by pretending
to be twin brothers.”
361
00:13:50,342 --> 00:13:51,341
And “made up my mind,
362
00:13:51,343 --> 00:13:52,509
“I'll ask for a threesome
363
00:13:52,511 --> 00:13:55,211
and if they say no,
play it off as a joke.”
364
00:13:55,213 --> 00:13:56,579
I'm calling her.
365
00:13:56,581 --> 00:13:59,816
And the threesome didn't deserve
the belly laugh it got.
366
00:13:59,818 --> 00:14:01,451
You're right.
367
00:14:01,453 --> 00:14:04,921
It could totally happen.
368
00:14:04,923 --> 00:14:05,989
Hello?
369
00:14:05,991 --> 00:14:07,557
Hi. Hi. Yeah, it's Raj.
370
00:14:07,559 --> 00:14:09,492
Rajesh.
We met at the comic book store.
371
00:14:09,494 --> 00:14:11,828
Hey, what's up? Figure out
what time you're free?
372
00:14:11,830 --> 00:14:13,196
Actually,
that's why I'm calling.
373
00:14:13,198 --> 00:14:14,564
I, um... I just...
374
00:14:14,566 --> 00:14:17,233
I need to let you know
that I have a girlfriend.
375
00:14:17,235 --> 00:14:19,169
Okay. Good for you.
376
00:14:19,972 --> 00:14:21,004
Well, no, no.
377
00:14:21,006 --> 00:14:22,172
I-I didn't want to mislead you
378
00:14:22,174 --> 00:14:23,473
after you asked me out.
379
00:14:23,475 --> 00:14:25,108
I didn't ask you out.
380
00:14:25,110 --> 00:14:26,977
I just need help
with my screenplay.
381
00:14:26,979 --> 00:14:29,512
Wait, are you saying
that we didn't have a vibe?
382
00:14:29,514 --> 00:14:31,681
Why do you care if we have
a vibe? You have a girlfriend.
383
00:14:31,683 --> 00:14:33,683
Come on! I just told you
I had a girlfriend.
384
00:14:33,685 --> 00:14:35,605
The least you can do is tell me
if we had a vibe.
385
00:14:37,222 --> 00:14:38,588
Sure, we had a vibe.
386
00:14:38,590 --> 00:14:40,390
I knew it.
Okay, we did have a vibe.
387
00:14:40,392 --> 00:14:41,691
This is exciting.
388
00:14:41,693 --> 00:14:43,860
What's my next move?
389
00:14:43,862 --> 00:14:45,228
You still have a girlfriend.
390
00:14:45,230 --> 00:14:47,397
Right. Good catch.
391
00:14:48,367 --> 00:14:50,033
Anyway, so I'm sorry
to waste your time.
392
00:14:50,035 --> 00:14:51,668
And, uh... and good luck
with your screenplay.
393
00:14:51,670 --> 00:14:53,003
Hang on.
394
00:14:53,005 --> 00:14:54,404
We're both adults.
395
00:14:54,406 --> 00:14:56,606
We can still get together
without it meaning anything.
396
00:14:56,608 --> 00:14:58,975
Not me. Ever since
you admitted we had a vibe,
397
00:14:58,977 --> 00:15:00,910
I've been planning our wedding.
398
00:15:02,314 --> 00:15:05,015
Look, it's just coffee.
399
00:15:05,017 --> 00:15:06,616
I'll ask you some questions
about science,
400
00:15:06,618 --> 00:15:09,452
and if you propose,
I promise to say no.
401
00:15:09,454 --> 00:15:12,689
Okay. That hurts a little,
but okay.
402
00:15:13,392 --> 00:15:14,924
Great. I'll text you.
403
00:15:14,926 --> 00:15:16,526
Bye.
404
00:15:16,528 --> 00:15:17,827
All right.
405
00:15:17,829 --> 00:15:20,764
So, uh, we're meeting
for coffee like two adults.
406
00:15:20,766 --> 00:15:22,665
Everybody's happy. Easy peasy.
407
00:15:22,667 --> 00:15:24,300
Are you gonna tell Emily?
408
00:15:24,302 --> 00:15:25,435
Yeah, of course.
409
00:15:25,437 --> 00:15:26,903
We have no secrets.
410
00:15:27,706 --> 00:15:29,439
When are you gonna tell Emily?
411
00:15:30,308 --> 00:15:32,509
He lied about the cream cheese!
412
00:15:32,511 --> 00:15:34,577
He ate the whole thing!
I saw him!
413
00:15:37,416 --> 00:15:39,916
Look, I know you think
I'm not right for Sheldon,
414
00:15:39,918 --> 00:15:41,918
but trust me,
I'm his best shot.
415
00:15:41,920 --> 00:15:44,421
You have no idea
how much I put up with!
416
00:15:44,423 --> 00:15:46,689
I know more than you think I do.
417
00:15:46,691 --> 00:15:48,825
Really? You know what it's like
to have date night ruined
418
00:15:48,827 --> 00:15:51,561
because Google changed
their font?
419
00:15:51,563 --> 00:15:53,563
Young lady,
420
00:15:53,565 --> 00:15:55,231
if you think I don't know
421
00:15:55,233 --> 00:15:56,466
what it's like to live
422
00:15:56,468 --> 00:15:58,568
with a stubborn,
egotistical man,
423
00:15:58,570 --> 00:15:59,903
then you're wrong.
424
00:15:59,905 --> 00:16:01,938
'Cause that was my husband.
425
00:16:01,940 --> 00:16:03,673
Really?
426
00:16:04,910 --> 00:16:07,644
There were days I wanted to fill
his pockets with corn
427
00:16:07,646 --> 00:16:10,180
and toss him in the pigpen.
428
00:16:11,016 --> 00:16:13,249
Well, if you understand,
429
00:16:13,251 --> 00:16:15,919
then why are you giving me
such a hard time?
430
00:16:15,921 --> 00:16:18,021
Because when you broke up
with Sheldon,
431
00:16:18,023 --> 00:16:19,322
it hurt him deeply,
432
00:16:19,324 --> 00:16:21,758
and I don't want to see
that happen again.
433
00:16:22,961 --> 00:16:24,928
Hi. Sorry.
434
00:16:24,930 --> 00:16:27,163
Sheldon would like
to say something to you.
435
00:16:27,165 --> 00:16:28,231
No, I wouldn't.
436
00:16:28,233 --> 00:16:29,532
Just get in here.
437
00:16:30,936 --> 00:16:31,968
Hello.
438
00:16:31,970 --> 00:16:33,436
Go ahead.
439
00:16:33,438 --> 00:16:35,004
Meemaw, look,
440
00:16:35,006 --> 00:16:36,973
I'm sorry, but...
441
00:16:36,975 --> 00:16:38,274
I have to defend
442
00:16:38,276 --> 00:16:40,210
my girlfriend to you.
443
00:16:40,212 --> 00:16:42,512
Oh, Sheldon, thank you.
444
00:16:42,514 --> 00:16:45,115
Oh, great, now you're gonna
get emotional.
445
00:16:49,754 --> 00:16:53,356
I always looked up
to you and Pop-Pop.
446
00:16:53,358 --> 00:16:55,625
I-I know what
a challenging man he could be,
447
00:16:55,627 --> 00:16:58,962
but I saw you stand
by him and-and make him
448
00:16:58,964 --> 00:17:00,563
into a better person.
449
00:17:00,565 --> 00:17:01,598
I did.
450
00:17:01,600 --> 00:17:02,699
Yeah, well, that is exactly
451
00:17:02,701 --> 00:17:04,667
what I've been doing
the last five years
452
00:17:04,669 --> 00:17:06,903
with this little
work in progress.
453
00:17:09,674 --> 00:17:11,875
He never disappoints,
does he?
454
00:17:13,044 --> 00:17:16,079
I think what Sheldon means
to say is
455
00:17:16,081 --> 00:17:18,281
we've both grown together.
456
00:17:18,283 --> 00:17:19,349
Isn't that right?
457
00:17:19,351 --> 00:17:20,750
Well...
458
00:17:20,752 --> 00:17:21,217
Say yes.
459
00:17:21,219 --> 00:17:22,585
Yes.
460
00:17:22,587 --> 00:17:23,987
Fine.
461
00:17:23,989 --> 00:17:27,690
If you feel so strongly,
I won't stand in your way.
462
00:17:27,692 --> 00:17:28,925
Thank you.
463
00:17:28,927 --> 00:17:30,026
So if he wanted
464
00:17:30,028 --> 00:17:32,228
to give me
that engagement ring,
465
00:17:32,230 --> 00:17:34,264
we would have your blessing?
466
00:17:34,266 --> 00:17:36,266
I suppose.
467
00:17:41,573 --> 00:17:43,139
I just gave you
my virginity, woman.
468
00:17:43,141 --> 00:17:44,874
Cool your jets.
469
00:17:52,790 --> 00:17:55,691
Yeah, see, if you
just change the story
470
00:17:55,693 --> 00:17:57,827
to the destruction
of our galaxy,
471
00:17:57,829 --> 00:18:00,329
then a super massive
black hole could work.
472
00:18:00,331 --> 00:18:01,897
This is great.
473
00:18:01,899 --> 00:18:04,166
Thank you so much.
474
00:18:04,168 --> 00:18:06,068
I just got to figure out
a way for everyone
475
00:18:06,070 --> 00:18:08,738
to die that isn't too scary
for children.
476
00:18:10,375 --> 00:18:14,176
And that's how
Mommy and Daddy met.
477
00:18:15,646 --> 00:18:17,947
Hey, did you ever tell Emily
about us?
478
00:18:17,949 --> 00:18:19,415
I will!
479
00:18:21,215 --> 00:18:27,715
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man