1 00:00:39,355 --> 00:00:42,689 Don't forget your summer reading on the Holocaust! 2 00:00:44,000 --> 00:00:45,326 Anyone want to trade me 3 00:00:45,430 --> 00:00:46,660 for this preppy-ass picnic basket 4 00:00:46,746 --> 00:00:47,911 one of my students gave me? 5 00:00:48,030 --> 00:00:49,446 Ooh, I'll take it. 6 00:00:49,532 --> 00:00:50,748 This will be perfect 7 00:00:50,866 --> 00:00:53,117 for my annual pilgrimage to Santa Barbara. 8 00:00:53,202 --> 00:00:54,918 This year, I will meet Oprah. 9 00:00:55,037 --> 00:00:57,621 Here, you can have this "Far Side" calendar. 10 00:00:57,706 --> 00:01:00,457 Eh. Lateral trade, but okay. 11 00:01:00,543 --> 00:01:04,094 I'm gonna use my gift from those drunks, the Fosters, 12 00:01:04,213 --> 00:01:06,130 to celebrate turning in my final grades. 13 00:01:06,215 --> 00:01:08,182 I had to pull an all-nighter last night. 14 00:01:08,267 --> 00:01:09,049 Me too. 15 00:01:09,185 --> 00:01:10,934 I was still up when my partner Geode 16 00:01:11,053 --> 00:01:13,270 got back from the night shift at the community garden. 17 00:01:13,389 --> 00:01:19,109 I'm still not sure. Is Geode a him or a her? 18 00:01:19,228 --> 00:01:20,394 Yes. 19 00:01:20,479 --> 00:01:21,645 I was too busy studying 20 00:01:21,730 --> 00:01:23,113 for my commercial driver's license 21 00:01:23,232 --> 00:01:25,065 last night to focus on grades. 22 00:01:25,201 --> 00:01:27,234 I just entered in "A-B-C, A-B-C, A-B-C" 23 00:01:27,319 --> 00:01:29,203 until all the empty boxes were filled. 24 00:01:29,288 --> 00:01:30,954 - That's unethical. - Nah. 25 00:01:31,073 --> 00:01:33,407 College doesn't look at grades until high school. 26 00:01:33,542 --> 00:01:35,242 Now if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go 27 00:01:35,327 --> 00:01:39,913 blaze up with my recorder pipe and hit the finger paints. 28 00:01:39,999 --> 00:01:41,915 Oh, good, I didn't miss the gift exchange. 29 00:01:42,051 --> 00:01:43,917 - What do you have? - "Far Side" calendar. 30 00:01:44,053 --> 00:01:45,469 - Talking animals. - Weird. 31 00:01:45,588 --> 00:01:47,638 Ooh, Chelsea, look what I got. 32 00:01:47,756 --> 00:01:49,556 I can use this on my drive to Rapture Camp. 33 00:01:49,642 --> 00:01:50,591 When is that? 34 00:01:50,726 --> 00:01:52,059 From mid-July to August, 35 00:01:52,144 --> 00:01:53,626 or if the rapture comes, forever. 36 00:01:53,855 --> 00:01:54,720 Huh. 37 00:01:54,745 --> 00:01:57,431 Cecelia, what will you trade me for this cedar candle? 38 00:01:57,566 --> 00:01:59,433 It's perfect for your Summer Save the Trees Jamboree. 39 00:01:59,568 --> 00:02:00,567 Actually, I'll be working 40 00:02:00,653 --> 00:02:02,176 at a human waste recycling think-tank. 41 00:02:02,261 --> 00:02:03,315 Gross. 42 00:02:03,433 --> 00:02:06,106 What about this "World's Best Teacher" shirt? 43 00:02:06,192 --> 00:02:09,086 Feels like it was made in a really humane sweatshop. 44 00:02:09,838 --> 00:02:11,214 Come on, what do you have? 45 00:02:11,925 --> 00:02:15,165 All I got was this summer sausage. 46 00:02:17,870 --> 00:02:19,453 All right, ladies, 47 00:02:19,588 --> 00:02:21,622 when you finish cleaning out your classrooms, 48 00:02:21,757 --> 00:02:23,290 come booze with me. 49 00:02:23,375 --> 00:02:26,245 If I miss you, I'll see you at my Summer Solstice barbecue. 50 00:02:26,364 --> 00:02:27,701 Bring your own sacrifice. 51 00:02:27,786 --> 00:02:29,076 Wait, I didn't know about that. 52 00:02:29,161 --> 00:02:30,544 I didn't invite you. 53 00:02:30,575 --> 00:02:31,370 See you later, bitches! 54 00:02:31,505 --> 00:02:32,246 Whoo! 55 00:02:35,971 --> 00:02:37,423 I don't think my students like me. 56 00:02:37,588 --> 00:02:38,504 Why do you think that? 57 00:02:38,622 --> 00:02:40,422 I only got a summer sausage. 58 00:02:40,507 --> 00:02:42,006 Maybe they're just poor. 59 00:02:42,125 --> 00:02:44,042 Ms. Snap, I don't want to go home! 60 00:02:44,127 --> 00:02:46,377 Oh. It's okay, honey. 61 00:02:46,463 --> 00:02:49,097 When you miss me, remember Ms. Snap is the moon, 62 00:02:49,182 --> 00:02:52,350 and she comes out every night to look down on you and smile. 63 00:02:52,469 --> 00:02:54,218 Just open up your drapes, and I'll be able 64 00:02:54,304 --> 00:02:56,354 to see you in your bed. 65 00:02:59,309 --> 00:03:00,441 I don't know what it is, 66 00:03:00,527 --> 00:03:02,310 but they, like, can't get enough of me. 67 00:03:02,445 --> 00:03:03,728 Oh, Jimmy! 68 00:03:03,813 --> 00:03:04,961 Did you miss me? 69 00:03:04,986 --> 00:03:05,852 Get off of me! 70 00:03:05,877 --> 00:03:07,899 I just came back for my eczema cream! 71 00:03:09,869 --> 00:03:11,786 Kids. 72 00:03:14,874 --> 00:03:18,242 Hey, Deb, can I get back my "Ready, set, learn" poster? 73 00:03:18,328 --> 00:03:19,827 Oh, yeah, it's over there. 74 00:03:19,963 --> 00:03:22,532 Some kid drew the huge schlong on it, not me. 75 00:03:25,969 --> 00:03:29,003 Hey, um, I was just wondering, 76 00:03:29,089 --> 00:03:31,589 why wasn't I invited to your Summer Solstice barbecue? 77 00:03:31,674 --> 00:03:33,174 I could get along with your friends. 78 00:03:33,259 --> 00:03:35,059 I loved the movie "Practical Magic." 79 00:03:35,178 --> 00:03:37,178 I don't need you there dust-busting the altar 80 00:03:37,263 --> 00:03:40,014 or ruining the bonfire with a lecture on fire safety. 81 00:03:40,100 --> 00:03:42,183 I wouldn't do that. 82 00:03:42,268 --> 00:03:43,568 Unless of course somebody was using 83 00:03:43,686 --> 00:03:44,936 an aerosol can too close to the flames 84 00:03:45,021 --> 00:03:46,988 or was wearing a flammable robe or cloak. 85 00:03:47,073 --> 00:03:49,357 You need to learn how to chill out, Caroline. 86 00:03:49,492 --> 00:03:50,525 You're too uptight. 87 00:03:50,660 --> 00:03:51,692 I chill out. 88 00:03:51,778 --> 00:03:53,027 You sleep with your pearls on. 89 00:03:53,113 --> 00:03:54,495 If there's an emergency evacuation, 90 00:03:54,581 --> 00:03:56,697 I want to make sure I'm appropriately accessorized. 91 00:03:56,833 --> 00:04:00,368 You have containers for your containers. 92 00:04:00,503 --> 00:04:03,538 Girl, I'm gonna give it to you straight. 93 00:04:03,623 --> 00:04:07,625 If you were a little less uptight, it would go a long way. 94 00:04:07,710 --> 00:04:10,461 Would an uptight person do this? 95 00:04:20,890 --> 00:04:22,557 Dude, that was sick! 96 00:04:22,642 --> 00:04:26,060 I learned to shut down my gag reflex in my sorority. 97 00:04:26,196 --> 00:04:30,198 For a charity bratwurst eating contest, not the other thing. 98 00:04:34,904 --> 00:04:37,371 - Toast, toast, toast. 99 00:04:37,457 --> 00:04:39,323 To drinking in school! 100 00:04:41,795 --> 00:04:44,128 Whoo! Things are getting nuts! 101 00:04:44,247 --> 00:04:45,713 I made soup in the microwave, 102 00:04:45,799 --> 00:04:47,915 and I didn't even wipe it down afterwards. 103 00:04:48,051 --> 00:04:49,717 Oh. 104 00:04:49,803 --> 00:04:52,053 Did I just say that twice? 105 00:04:52,138 --> 00:04:54,055 You didn't say anything. 106 00:04:54,140 --> 00:04:55,256 Oh. 107 00:04:55,391 --> 00:04:57,675 Job well done, recorder pipe. 108 00:04:59,562 --> 00:05:01,345 Mary Louise, you haven't taken your shot yet. 109 00:05:01,431 --> 00:05:05,600 I'm hypoglycemic. I get kind of goofy on alcohol. 110 00:05:05,685 --> 00:05:07,568 I found out the hard way when I drank communion wine 111 00:05:07,654 --> 00:05:10,404 at my cousin's baptism and started screaming, 112 00:05:10,490 --> 00:05:11,689 "Dunk the baby!" 113 00:05:13,610 --> 00:05:17,445 Come on, Mary Louise. It's summer. Loosen up a bit. 114 00:05:17,530 --> 00:05:18,779 Yeah. 115 00:05:18,915 --> 00:05:20,164 Okay. 116 00:05:20,283 --> 00:05:21,582 If you guys think it's cool... 117 00:05:21,668 --> 00:05:22,617 Mm-hmm. 118 00:05:22,702 --> 00:05:23,618 Then I think it's cool. 119 00:05:25,421 --> 00:05:27,505 - Oh! - Yeah, now we're talking! 120 00:05:29,709 --> 00:05:30,791 Hoosier mamas. 121 00:05:32,712 --> 00:05:35,680 Moms from Indiana! "Hoosier mamas." 122 00:05:37,934 --> 00:05:40,718 You mean, "Who's your mama"? 123 00:05:40,803 --> 00:05:42,386 Hoosier mamas! 124 00:05:42,472 --> 00:05:44,138 Okay, bye. 125 00:05:44,224 --> 00:05:45,556 What? 126 00:05:45,642 --> 00:05:46,891 Mary Louise? 127 00:05:53,449 --> 00:05:57,068 Mary Louise? Mary Louise! 128 00:05:58,538 --> 00:06:01,155 I wish it wasn't the case, but due to budget cuts, 129 00:06:01,241 --> 00:06:03,157 one position will have to go. 130 00:06:03,243 --> 00:06:05,826 I'd be happy to advise you on which teacher to fire. 131 00:06:05,912 --> 00:06:08,045 I don't need your advice, Marty. 132 00:06:08,164 --> 00:06:09,497 What if I'm able to dig up some dirt 133 00:06:09,582 --> 00:06:10,882 on one of the teachers? 134 00:06:11,000 --> 00:06:13,467 Sure, Marty, if you discover any gross negligence, 135 00:06:13,553 --> 00:06:14,752 feel free to let me know. 136 00:06:14,837 --> 00:06:15,753 Gross negligence. 137 00:06:15,838 --> 00:06:17,088 All right, let's go. 138 00:06:17,173 --> 00:06:20,091 We've got 15 other classrooms to inspect. 139 00:06:20,176 --> 00:06:22,643 Marty, why are you carrying that diaper bag? 140 00:06:22,729 --> 00:06:26,047 Oh, it's not a diaper bag. It's my man sack. 141 00:06:26,149 --> 00:06:29,150 You don't want to call it that. 142 00:06:33,831 --> 00:06:35,514 Are you sure you heard someone's getting fired? 143 00:06:35,599 --> 00:06:37,265 Yes. I was kidnapped in the Peace Corps, 144 00:06:37,401 --> 00:06:39,067 and they blindfolded me for six days. 145 00:06:39,153 --> 00:06:40,986 I was forced to develop super hearing. 146 00:06:41,105 --> 00:06:41,919 Who do you think it'll be? 147 00:06:42,004 --> 00:06:44,906 I don't know, but Marty's dying to fire one of us. 148 00:06:44,992 --> 00:06:45,907 I can't get fired. 149 00:06:45,993 --> 00:06:47,192 I already put a deposit down 150 00:06:47,277 --> 00:06:48,860 on the Zone Diet meal delivery for the summer. 151 00:06:48,946 --> 00:06:51,696 I'm not going to cancel it and then have to exercise. 152 00:06:51,782 --> 00:06:53,698 Well, I know I'm not getting fired. 153 00:06:53,784 --> 00:06:56,368 No offense, but I'm the best teacher here. 154 00:06:56,453 --> 00:06:59,704 Plus, I got these big ol' boobies. 155 00:06:59,790 --> 00:07:02,007 Can you get fired if your kids don't like you? 156 00:07:02,126 --> 00:07:03,291 Your kids like you. 157 00:07:03,377 --> 00:07:04,509 I assigned them ten books to read 158 00:07:04,628 --> 00:07:06,461 about the Holocaust over the summer. 159 00:07:06,597 --> 00:07:08,630 Oh, my God, your kids must hate you. 160 00:07:08,766 --> 00:07:11,216 I'm sorry, that did come out before I could stop it. 161 00:07:11,301 --> 00:07:12,517 Marty's a tool. 162 00:07:12,636 --> 00:07:13,802 As long as Pearson doesn't have 163 00:07:13,887 --> 00:07:15,720 any ammo against us, we're good. 164 00:07:15,806 --> 00:07:18,607 Oh, crap. I gotta hide my stash and Febreze my room. 165 00:07:18,692 --> 00:07:19,775 Uh, you do know that you have 166 00:07:19,860 --> 00:07:21,910 your recorder pipe in your hand, right? 167 00:07:22,896 --> 00:07:24,863 Nice catch. 168 00:07:28,402 --> 00:07:29,785 - Whoa! - Oh! 169 00:07:29,870 --> 00:07:31,403 Oh. 170 00:07:31,488 --> 00:07:34,873 Oh, God, Mary Louise is having a hypoglycemic meltdown! 171 00:07:34,992 --> 00:07:35,991 Someone has to catch her. 172 00:07:36,076 --> 00:07:37,375 I'll find her. 173 00:07:37,494 --> 00:07:38,743 You're sticking with me, Boobies. 174 00:07:38,829 --> 00:07:41,246 We don't need any other liabilities. 175 00:07:53,677 --> 00:07:55,594 Ms. Feldman? 176 00:07:57,147 --> 00:07:58,513 Hey, sorry for the surprise visit. 177 00:07:58,649 --> 00:08:00,765 Just wanted to catch you before you left for summer. 178 00:08:00,851 --> 00:08:03,518 I'm so glad you did. What's up? 179 00:08:03,604 --> 00:08:04,603 I just wanted to talk to you 180 00:08:04,688 --> 00:08:07,355 about Tavis's final report card. 181 00:08:09,693 --> 00:08:12,027 We just felt that Tavis's final grade in reading 182 00:08:12,112 --> 00:08:14,162 seemed a little... off. 183 00:08:14,248 --> 00:08:15,747 Hmm. 184 00:08:15,866 --> 00:08:19,084 Because it was... 185 00:08:19,203 --> 00:08:20,118 Low. 186 00:08:20,204 --> 00:08:21,119 Low. 187 00:08:21,205 --> 00:08:22,871 Lower than we had expected 188 00:08:22,956 --> 00:08:25,790 because Tavis normally gets B... 189 00:08:25,876 --> 00:08:27,042 - As. - As. 190 00:08:27,177 --> 00:08:28,376 - Uh-huh. - Right. 191 00:08:28,512 --> 00:08:32,214 And here it says that he got a C? 192 00:08:32,349 --> 00:08:34,716 Oh, that's not right. 193 00:08:34,801 --> 00:08:37,802 That's not right at all. I gave him an A. 194 00:08:37,888 --> 00:08:39,638 God damn it! 195 00:08:39,723 --> 00:08:42,023 None of this would've happened if the administration 196 00:08:42,109 --> 00:08:43,475 would just listen to me! 197 00:08:43,560 --> 00:08:45,610 I keep asking them for a new network 198 00:08:45,729 --> 00:08:50,565 with a better... firewall, and they just ignore me! 199 00:08:50,651 --> 00:08:53,902 Does no one care about the kids but me? 200 00:08:54,037 --> 00:08:56,037 - So this is a computer issue? - Yeah. 201 00:08:56,123 --> 00:08:58,240 Okay, well, I'd be happy to go discuss this with Principal... 202 00:08:58,375 --> 00:08:59,574 No! 203 00:08:59,660 --> 00:09:04,246 I...want to show that son of a mother 204 00:09:04,381 --> 00:09:06,464 a piece of my mind! 205 00:09:06,583 --> 00:09:10,635 It's gonna be a rumble in the jungle. 206 00:09:10,754 --> 00:09:13,972 You don't want to stick around for that. 207 00:09:17,227 --> 00:09:18,677 Well, that's taken care of. 208 00:09:18,762 --> 00:09:21,346 Hey, let me walk you out. 209 00:09:23,016 --> 00:09:24,849 Bears looking pretty good this year. 210 00:09:24,935 --> 00:09:26,518 No, season doesn't start for four months. 211 00:09:26,603 --> 00:09:28,520 Okay. See you next year. 212 00:09:36,113 --> 00:09:37,696 What is going on in here? 213 00:09:37,781 --> 00:09:40,532 I'm tearing up my lesson plans because they suck! 214 00:09:40,617 --> 00:09:43,118 I bet my kids hated learning about... 215 00:09:43,203 --> 00:09:44,369 Darfur! 216 00:09:44,454 --> 00:09:46,538 You are being way too hard on yourself. 217 00:09:46,623 --> 00:09:48,373 None of us are perfect. 218 00:09:48,458 --> 00:09:50,759 I bribe my kids with candy, and I always put 219 00:09:50,844 --> 00:09:52,294 the good-looking kids at the front of the class, 220 00:09:52,379 --> 00:09:53,845 so I don't have to look at the uglies. 221 00:09:53,964 --> 00:09:55,630 And I hand out permission slips for field trips 222 00:09:55,766 --> 00:09:56,798 as late as possible because then 223 00:09:56,934 --> 00:09:58,133 some of the students will forget them 224 00:09:58,268 --> 00:09:59,884 and I won't have to bring them. 225 00:09:59,970 --> 00:10:00,969 Really? 226 00:10:01,104 --> 00:10:04,723 Yeah. 227 00:10:04,808 --> 00:10:09,811 Oh, my God. I'm the [BLEEP] teacher. 228 00:10:09,896 --> 00:10:13,231 If we catch Bennigan, we might have to tie her down. 229 00:10:13,317 --> 00:10:14,482 Do you have any rope? 230 00:10:14,618 --> 00:10:15,817 Oh, or a Bible. 231 00:10:15,902 --> 00:10:17,953 We could use it as bait for a trap. 232 00:10:18,038 --> 00:10:21,656 Hey, Debbie Doughnut, I did my eye makeup like you! 233 00:10:21,792 --> 00:10:24,909 Now we both look like we had a bad high school experience. 234 00:10:24,995 --> 00:10:26,711 If you're not gonna pierce your clit, 235 00:10:26,830 --> 00:10:29,164 stop trying to relate to me. 236 00:10:30,417 --> 00:10:31,716 Ms. Watson, you are aware 237 00:10:31,835 --> 00:10:34,302 that your class must be emptied by 3:00 p.m. 238 00:10:34,388 --> 00:10:37,422 Yup, and my bladder needs to be emptied by the end of now. 239 00:10:37,507 --> 00:10:40,058 Don't worry, I was just helping Caroline clean up. 240 00:10:40,177 --> 00:10:43,895 You don't help people. I got my eyes on you two. 241 00:10:45,182 --> 00:10:47,349 Hey! You've gotta pull yourself together. 242 00:10:47,434 --> 00:10:48,683 That was too close. 243 00:10:48,769 --> 00:10:49,851 Marty is a farty, 244 00:10:49,987 --> 00:10:52,854 and Principal Pearson is a penis! 245 00:10:52,939 --> 00:10:55,023 Caroline! Quiet coyote. 246 00:10:56,159 --> 00:10:59,527 Listen, I'm sorry I called you uptight. 247 00:10:59,613 --> 00:11:02,781 You're really organized and good at making plans, 248 00:11:02,866 --> 00:11:05,250 and honestly, we need someone like that around here. 249 00:11:05,369 --> 00:11:07,118 Really? You mean that? 250 00:11:07,204 --> 00:11:08,420 Yeah. 251 00:11:08,538 --> 00:11:10,455 Every group needs an anal-retentive turd 252 00:11:10,540 --> 00:11:13,091 to keep everyone else in line, 253 00:11:13,210 --> 00:11:15,760 and that's you. 254 00:11:18,015 --> 00:11:20,215 Thank you. 255 00:11:21,551 --> 00:11:22,934 What was that? 256 00:11:44,465 --> 00:11:45,380 You know, maybe it's for the best 257 00:11:45,466 --> 00:11:46,849 one of us is getting laid off. 258 00:11:46,967 --> 00:11:49,384 We won't ruin any more students' lives. 259 00:11:49,470 --> 00:11:52,471 Seriously. No more kids who can't multiply by threes. 260 00:11:52,606 --> 00:11:53,522 What? 261 00:11:53,641 --> 00:11:55,774 I forgot to teach the threes this year. 262 00:11:55,860 --> 00:11:57,609 Multiplication started at the same time 263 00:11:57,695 --> 00:12:00,229 as a very stressful season of "America's Next Top Model." 264 00:12:00,314 --> 00:12:02,056 At least your kids didn't have to watch 265 00:12:02,141 --> 00:12:03,782 a slide show on the My Lai Massacre. 266 00:12:03,868 --> 00:12:05,367 Woof. You know what? 267 00:12:05,486 --> 00:12:07,286 On the bright side, I can finally get 268 00:12:07,371 --> 00:12:09,321 my ab-contouring vlog off the ground. 269 00:12:09,406 --> 00:12:11,373 And I've always wanted to travel abroad. 270 00:12:11,492 --> 00:12:13,041 I have to see Key West. 271 00:12:13,160 --> 00:12:16,879 So cheers. 272 00:12:25,556 --> 00:12:28,173 I want to keep teaching. 273 00:12:28,259 --> 00:12:32,811 My kids are, like, the only people who get me. 274 00:12:34,932 --> 00:12:37,232 I know. 275 00:12:38,736 --> 00:12:40,402 Mmm. 276 00:12:44,275 --> 00:12:45,407 Quick! Come here! 277 00:12:45,526 --> 00:12:47,359 Don't worry, I'll lasso him. 278 00:12:47,444 --> 00:12:48,610 Yeah, buddy. 279 00:12:53,500 --> 00:12:56,535 Shame on this school. Shame on this district. 280 00:12:56,670 --> 00:13:01,590 Shame on society for allowing a perfectly capable child 281 00:13:01,709 --> 00:13:02,958 to fall through the cracks 282 00:13:03,043 --> 00:13:06,428 due to some highly preventable computer error. 283 00:13:06,547 --> 00:13:08,630 Lucy did not deserve a C! 284 00:13:08,716 --> 00:13:10,048 Ugh! 285 00:13:11,552 --> 00:13:13,385 She didn't get a C. 286 00:13:13,470 --> 00:13:16,555 Lucy did not deserve a B! 287 00:13:16,690 --> 00:13:19,141 Actually, she got an A. 288 00:13:19,226 --> 00:13:20,609 Okay, I'm confused. 289 00:13:20,728 --> 00:13:23,278 She's brought home nothing but Ds all year. 290 00:13:23,397 --> 00:13:25,030 What happened? 291 00:13:25,115 --> 00:13:26,889 Let me explain. 292 00:13:33,407 --> 00:13:35,207 She's a genius. 293 00:13:35,292 --> 00:13:36,408 Lucy? 294 00:13:36,929 --> 00:13:38,962 In participation. 295 00:13:39,079 --> 00:13:40,329 Participation? 296 00:13:40,414 --> 00:13:43,415 Yes. It's rare. 297 00:13:43,550 --> 00:13:44,883 The only way I can describe it 298 00:13:44,969 --> 00:13:46,918 is if you've seen "Good Will Hunting." 299 00:13:47,004 --> 00:13:48,670 I haven't seen it. 300 00:13:48,756 --> 00:13:50,639 Then I can't describe it. 301 00:13:51,976 --> 00:13:53,809 So are we good here? 302 00:13:53,927 --> 00:13:55,306 I guess so? 303 00:13:55,743 --> 00:13:57,596 Gotta see "Good Will Hunting." 304 00:13:57,731 --> 00:14:00,766 Lucy's Matt Damon, and I'm Robin Williams, 305 00:14:00,901 --> 00:14:05,237 and you'd be the foster father that beats up his back real bad 306 00:14:05,322 --> 00:14:07,739 and scars it up all nasty like. 307 00:14:07,825 --> 00:14:12,444 Although the analogy falls apart at that point, so... eh. 308 00:14:12,529 --> 00:14:14,863 I'm gonna go now. 309 00:14:14,948 --> 00:14:16,782 Okay. 310 00:14:19,286 --> 00:14:21,586 How 'bout them apples? 311 00:14:23,590 --> 00:14:25,590 Gotta see "Good Will Hunting." 312 00:14:28,629 --> 00:14:32,097 You're, like, the prettiest smart person I know. 313 00:14:32,182 --> 00:14:34,016 I love you so much. 314 00:14:34,134 --> 00:14:35,634 Oh, I can't believe we've never 315 00:14:35,769 --> 00:14:37,686 opened up to each other like this before. 316 00:14:37,805 --> 00:14:38,520 I know. 317 00:14:40,974 --> 00:14:41,773 Oh. 318 00:14:41,859 --> 00:14:43,608 You smell like fermented cabbage. 319 00:14:43,694 --> 00:14:46,194 Thank you! I make my own kimchi. 320 00:14:46,313 --> 00:14:48,947 Mary Louise, are you in here? 321 00:14:49,033 --> 00:14:49,948 Hi. 322 00:14:50,034 --> 00:14:50,982 Hey. 323 00:14:51,068 --> 00:14:52,067 Hey. 324 00:14:52,152 --> 00:14:53,465 Have you seen Mary Louise? 325 00:14:53,550 --> 00:14:55,871 No, we've been talking about what giant sacks of crap we are. 326 00:14:55,989 --> 00:14:57,823 While I endorse that sentiment, 327 00:14:57,908 --> 00:15:00,325 Mary Louise is naked-jigging around the school 328 00:15:00,461 --> 00:15:02,044 like a feral leprechaun. 329 00:15:02,162 --> 00:15:04,579 If we don't find her, Pearson's gonna fire her on the spot! 330 00:15:04,665 --> 00:15:07,499 We've got to save my little bottom bitch. 331 00:15:08,802 --> 00:15:09,918 Earth! 332 00:15:10,003 --> 00:15:10,886 Fire! 333 00:15:11,004 --> 00:15:12,838 - Wind! - Water! 334 00:15:13,674 --> 00:15:15,257 We forgot to do "heart." 335 00:15:15,342 --> 00:15:17,893 Bennigan is heart. 336 00:15:18,011 --> 00:15:19,428 We gotta find her. 337 00:15:20,681 --> 00:15:23,065 What the hell was "heart" anyway? 338 00:15:24,318 --> 00:15:26,017 Feldman, we need your help. 339 00:15:26,153 --> 00:15:29,237 Oh, hey, I stashed Recordy the Musical Pot Pipe 340 00:15:29,356 --> 00:15:30,689 in your LeSportsac bag. 341 00:15:30,774 --> 00:15:32,908 I didn't bring a bag today. 342 00:15:33,026 --> 00:15:34,576 Feldman, hurry up! 343 00:15:34,695 --> 00:15:36,912 I found something! 344 00:15:40,117 --> 00:15:42,033 These were on the floor. 345 00:15:42,119 --> 00:15:44,503 They're still warm. She's not far! 346 00:15:47,508 --> 00:15:49,091 There she is! Grab her! 347 00:15:49,209 --> 00:15:52,210 Mary Louise, you're having a hypoglycemic meltdown! 348 00:15:52,296 --> 00:15:53,545 Stop running! 349 00:15:53,680 --> 00:15:54,713 - Over here! - Somebody get her! 350 00:15:54,848 --> 00:15:56,598 - Back here! - Mary Louise! 351 00:15:56,717 --> 00:15:59,434 M-L-B, get your holy heinie over here right now! 352 00:15:59,553 --> 00:16:00,719 - Ah! - Stop! 353 00:16:00,804 --> 00:16:01,887 - Oh, no. No! - Come on! 354 00:16:03,140 --> 00:16:04,556 I love that you're so comfortable 355 00:16:04,641 --> 00:16:06,308 with your own body, but knock it off! 356 00:16:06,393 --> 00:16:07,642 - I got her, I got her. - Okay. 357 00:16:07,728 --> 00:16:09,644 - Oh, God. - Go for it! 358 00:16:09,730 --> 00:16:11,113 I got her, I got her! 359 00:16:11,231 --> 00:16:12,314 - Oh. - Whoa. 360 00:16:12,399 --> 00:16:14,950 Oh! - Come on! 361 00:16:15,068 --> 00:16:16,818 Oh, she's not getting away. 362 00:16:16,904 --> 00:16:19,621 Oh, no. Here I come. 363 00:16:19,740 --> 00:16:22,908 Go, Mary Louise! You got this, girl. 364 00:16:23,043 --> 00:16:24,042 What are you doing? 365 00:16:24,128 --> 00:16:25,544 She's amazing. 366 00:16:25,629 --> 00:16:27,212 Right there. 367 00:16:28,465 --> 00:16:29,881 - Bennigan! - Get up, girl. 368 00:16:29,967 --> 00:16:31,299 - It's over. - Get her! 369 00:16:31,418 --> 00:16:34,252 Ladies, why are we all congregated on the playground? 370 00:16:36,590 --> 00:16:37,923 - Ms. Snap? - Hmm? 371 00:16:38,058 --> 00:16:40,392 Will you be sliding down to join us? 372 00:16:40,477 --> 00:16:43,762 No. Mm-mm. 373 00:16:52,439 --> 00:16:54,072 What on earth? 374 00:16:56,777 --> 00:16:59,744 What the fudge? Martin Crumbs! 375 00:16:59,830 --> 00:17:00,779 It's not mine. 376 00:17:00,914 --> 00:17:01,780 One of these overpaid babysitters 377 00:17:01,865 --> 00:17:03,248 put it in my man sack! 378 00:17:03,333 --> 00:17:05,450 Did they put it in your mouth and light it too? 379 00:17:05,586 --> 00:17:07,285 Figuratively, yes, they did. 380 00:17:07,371 --> 00:17:08,537 I couldn't take it anymore. 381 00:17:08,622 --> 00:17:10,422 They defied my authority all year! 382 00:17:10,507 --> 00:17:12,174 What authority? 383 00:17:12,292 --> 00:17:16,294 Thank you for making it easy to decide which position to cut. 384 00:17:16,430 --> 00:17:18,680 Get in my office, now. 385 00:17:21,852 --> 00:17:24,853 Stupid man sack. 386 00:17:27,891 --> 00:17:29,641 Mary Louise, are you okay? 387 00:17:29,726 --> 00:17:31,476 Hey, friends! 388 00:17:31,562 --> 00:17:32,944 I got my butt got stuck 389 00:17:33,030 --> 00:17:36,281 in this slide on the last day of school! 390 00:17:40,120 --> 00:17:41,486 Oh, great. 391 00:17:41,622 --> 00:17:44,322 Now I've seen all her holes. 392 00:17:49,381 --> 00:17:51,881 Well, we all survived another school year. 393 00:17:57,089 --> 00:18:00,090 I feel like I've been given a new lease on life. 394 00:18:00,175 --> 00:18:01,424 Next year, I'm gonna do right by my students 395 00:18:01,560 --> 00:18:02,739 and learn their names. 396 00:18:02,764 --> 00:18:04,427 I'm going to take genocide out of my unit 397 00:18:04,563 --> 00:18:06,312 on wartime atrocities. 398 00:18:06,431 --> 00:18:07,847 Kids just gotta be kids. 399 00:18:07,933 --> 00:18:11,601 I just want to say, when I put grades in randomly, 400 00:18:11,736 --> 00:18:13,603 it wasn't because I didn't care. 401 00:18:13,738 --> 00:18:16,356 It's because it doesn't matter. 402 00:18:16,441 --> 00:18:18,491 I'm not changing shit. 403 00:18:19,178 --> 00:18:20,910 I'm gonna miss you guys. 404 00:18:20,996 --> 00:18:24,998 Well, we'll see you at the Summer Solstice barbecue. 405 00:18:33,258 --> 00:18:35,708 Oh! 406 00:18:40,232 --> 00:18:41,865 Was that my summer sausage?