1
00:00:00,467 --> 00:00:03,893
~ Addic7ed.com ~
2
00:00:13,088 --> 00:00:15,398
You sure are going
to town on that granola.
3
00:00:15,433 --> 00:00:18,075
This isn't some stinky,
hippie granola.
4
00:00:18,110 --> 00:00:19,310
This is ferret chow.
5
00:00:22,557 --> 00:00:26,451
Okay, I'll ask.
Why are you eating ferret chow?
6
00:00:26,527 --> 00:00:28,669
If it's good enough for
the most kick-butt animal
7
00:00:28,705 --> 00:00:30,225
on the planet,
it's good enough for me.
8
00:00:32,400 --> 00:00:36,093
Ooh, blood grub.
9
00:00:36,128 --> 00:00:37,661
And it's a squirter.
10
00:00:41,567 --> 00:00:45,778
- Everybody, I got big news.
- You don't have big news.
11
00:00:45,813 --> 00:00:47,396
Whenever you have big news,
12
00:00:47,432 --> 00:00:49,182
you bring us a cake
from Dantoni's.
13
00:00:49,217 --> 00:00:51,017
- He doesn't have big news.
- No way.
14
00:00:51,052 --> 00:00:53,052
Uh, I do, and I had a cake.
15
00:00:53,088 --> 00:00:56,063
I just accidentally sat on it.
16
00:00:56,098 --> 00:00:58,991
ALL: He's got big news!
17
00:00:59,027 --> 00:01:01,436
The International Gaming
League just announced they'll be
18
00:01:01,437 --> 00:01:03,845
releasing their first round
of team rankings this Saturday!
19
00:01:03,881 --> 00:01:05,375
How high do you think
we'll be ranked, sir?
20
00:01:05,399 --> 00:01:09,185
In the heavenly seventy?
The nifty fifty?
21
00:01:09,220 --> 00:01:11,812
The fortified forty-five?
22
00:01:12,147 --> 00:01:13,639
Franklin, please.
23
00:01:13,674 --> 00:01:15,882
You've got Kid Fury as your leader,
24
00:01:15,918 --> 00:01:18,544
and I'm always in the top ten.
25
00:01:18,580 --> 00:01:21,180
Hey, gamers, so the International
Gaming League rankings
26
00:01:21,215 --> 00:01:23,098
are a very big deal.
27
00:01:23,134 --> 00:01:24,717
They take into account
tournament wins,
28
00:01:24,752 --> 00:01:26,368
individual stats,
and if you're lucky,
29
00:01:26,404 --> 00:01:28,004
the overall hunkiness
of the team leader.
30
00:01:30,007 --> 00:01:32,341
Now, only the top 50 teams
at the end of the year
31
00:01:32,377 --> 00:01:34,185
get to go to the IGL Nationals
32
00:01:34,220 --> 00:01:36,295
in New York City,
and I love New York.
33
00:01:36,330 --> 00:01:37,746
I even speak the language.
34
00:01:37,781 --> 00:01:39,156
What are you tawkin'
about, buddy?
35
00:01:39,192 --> 00:01:41,567
That's my cab. Oh, really?
36
00:01:41,602 --> 00:01:43,719
Really? What am I gonna do?
37
00:01:43,754 --> 00:01:45,746
I'll tell you what I'm gonna do.
38
00:01:45,782 --> 00:01:51,327
I'm gonna... [horn blares]
39
00:01:51,362 --> 00:01:55,022
with my bowling shoe.
40
00:01:55,057 --> 00:01:56,385
They're gonna live stream the
ranking announcement on Saturday,
41
00:01:56,409 --> 00:01:59,293
so I say we have a little
viewing party at the Squid.
42
00:01:59,370 --> 00:02:01,210
- Sweet! - Party!
- I'll bring the blood grubs.
43
00:02:03,040 --> 00:02:06,192
Sir, I hate to be
a doubting Deborah,
44
00:02:06,227 --> 00:02:07,704
but we don't know exactly
where we're gonna be ranked,
45
00:02:07,728 --> 00:02:09,595
so let's not get too crazy.
46
00:02:09,630 --> 00:02:11,964
You know what? Franklin's right.
47
00:02:11,999 --> 00:02:13,841
Let's just keep it
a small, little gathering
48
00:02:13,877 --> 00:02:14,997
- with a few friends.
- Yeah.
49
00:02:22,752 --> 00:02:26,112
I'm glad we didn't go too crazy.
50
00:02:26,189 --> 00:02:29,023
Hey, I paid for a lot more
confetti than this, pal.
51
00:02:32,728 --> 00:02:35,337
[Spluttering]
52
00:02:35,373 --> 00:02:37,406
That's what I'm talkin' about.
53
00:02:38,443 --> 00:02:41,409
[Title music]
54
00:02:52,273 --> 00:02:54,006
♪ Gamer's Guide ♪
55
00:02:59,822 --> 00:03:01,347
♪ Gamer's Guide ♪
56
00:03:02,806 --> 00:03:05,369
2x04 - The Rankening
57
00:03:05,370 --> 00:03:06,370
♪ Gamer's Guide ♪
58
00:03:11,935 --> 00:03:14,243
Hey, everybody, just wanna say,
59
00:03:14,278 --> 00:03:19,231
it's good to see everyone here.
Our friends, family,
60
00:03:19,266 --> 00:03:21,666
those weird dudes from the bowling
alley that no one invited.
61
00:03:22,795 --> 00:03:25,338
This is so exciting.
62
00:03:25,373 --> 00:03:28,190
Alice thinks we're
gonna be number one.
63
00:03:28,225 --> 00:03:31,101
Here we go again
with the imaginary girlfriend.
64
00:03:31,137 --> 00:03:33,420
I'm not imaginary, Wendell.
65
00:03:33,455 --> 00:03:35,166
I've been going out with
Franklin for three months.
66
00:03:35,190 --> 00:03:37,900
We walked here together.
67
00:03:37,935 --> 00:03:40,428
Oh, yeah!
68
00:03:40,463 --> 00:03:42,830
I remember you.
69
00:03:42,865 --> 00:03:45,533
How you doing?
You got a boyfriend?
70
00:03:45,568 --> 00:03:48,394
BOTH: Yes!
71
00:03:48,429 --> 00:03:50,420
Not buying it.
72
00:03:50,456 --> 00:03:52,831
[Groans]
73
00:03:52,867 --> 00:03:54,219
All right, they're about
to announce the rankings,
74
00:03:54,243 --> 00:03:56,035
so everyone be quiet.
75
00:03:56,070 --> 00:03:59,062
IGL host Faruq Tauheed here,
76
00:03:59,098 --> 00:04:02,383
counting down IGL's
top 1,000 teams.
77
00:04:02,418 --> 00:04:06,258
Really?! I gotta read
1,000 of these things?!
78
00:04:08,148 --> 00:04:11,584
And here we go.
Our top teams are...
79
00:04:21,962 --> 00:04:25,564
and rounding out the top five is
80
00:04:25,600 --> 00:04:26,706
Thumbs...
81
00:04:26,742 --> 00:04:28,701
Of...
82
00:04:28,736 --> 00:04:30,477
Fortune!
83
00:04:33,107 --> 00:04:35,557
Okay, okay, we're not
in the top five.
84
00:04:35,593 --> 00:04:37,233
But I guarantee you,
we're in the top ten.
85
00:04:40,915 --> 00:04:45,159
And ranked at number 998...
86
00:04:47,997 --> 00:04:50,814
as if anyone is still watching,
87
00:04:50,850 --> 00:04:53,300
is...
88
00:04:53,336 --> 00:04:56,084
Oh, come on.
89
00:04:57,632 --> 00:04:59,089
At 999...
90
00:05:01,451 --> 00:05:05,579
[Yells] Yes!!
Yes!
91
00:05:05,614 --> 00:05:08,023
Check your rearview
mirrors, Minivan Mommas,
92
00:05:08,058 --> 00:05:09,508
'cause we're hot on your tail.
93
00:05:09,543 --> 00:05:11,226
Whoo!
94
00:05:20,063 --> 00:05:22,545
Oh, really? Yes, that's great.
95
00:05:22,581 --> 00:05:24,639
Thank you, Jerry. Bye-bye.
96
00:05:24,675 --> 00:05:26,317
Ha ha! I knew it.
97
00:05:26,352 --> 00:05:28,702
I talked to my buddy
down at IGL,
98
00:05:28,737 --> 00:05:30,098
and he said there was
a mistake in the calculations.
99
00:05:30,122 --> 00:05:33,073
We're not ranked 999.
100
00:05:33,109 --> 00:05:34,503
He's sending me
the real ranking right now.
101
00:05:34,527 --> 00:05:37,827
Our real ranking is
number one...
102
00:05:37,863 --> 00:05:39,738
- [all gasping]
- thousand and four.
103
00:05:39,774 --> 00:05:41,982
Way to go, Conor.
104
00:05:42,018 --> 00:05:44,518
Your little phone call
just cost us...
105
00:05:44,554 --> 00:05:47,630
five spots.
106
00:05:47,665 --> 00:05:50,349
Great. Now I can't
rock this anymore.
107
00:05:53,254 --> 00:05:55,174
You shouldn't be rocking
that in the first place.
108
00:05:56,482 --> 00:05:59,058
Okay, according to the rankings
breakdown Jerry sent,
109
00:05:59,093 --> 00:06:00,834
our tournament points are solid,
110
00:06:00,870 --> 00:06:01,963
but our individual stats
are way down.
111
00:06:01,987 --> 00:06:04,796
Franklin, you didn't play
a single hour last week.
112
00:06:04,832 --> 00:06:07,324
Look, I had
a viewing party to plan.
113
00:06:07,359 --> 00:06:09,276
You think those eggs
deviled themselves?
114
00:06:09,311 --> 00:06:11,987
Wendell, what's your excuse?
115
00:06:12,022 --> 00:06:13,847
Hey, I got a ferret farm to run.
116
00:06:13,883 --> 00:06:15,332
I gotta feed 'em,
I gotta clean 'em,
117
00:06:15,367 --> 00:06:16,736
I gotta get 'em in the mood
for breeding.
118
00:06:16,760 --> 00:06:19,161
How do you do that?
119
00:06:19,196 --> 00:06:21,004
Put 'em in the cage
and look away.
120
00:06:22,750 --> 00:06:25,059
Okay, Ashley.
121
00:06:25,094 --> 00:06:27,269
Uh, don't look at me, Conor.
122
00:06:27,304 --> 00:06:29,604
I've been a little
preoccupied lately.
123
00:06:29,640 --> 00:06:31,660
It's prom season, and there
are four guys who wanna take me.
124
00:06:31,684 --> 00:06:37,062
I'm in the middle of playing
some serious mind games.
125
00:06:37,097 --> 00:06:39,164
You three should be
ashamed of yourselves.
126
00:06:39,200 --> 00:06:40,474
You know whose fault this is?
127
00:06:40,509 --> 00:06:43,060
Mine.
128
00:06:43,095 --> 00:06:45,671
I tried to treat you like adults.
129
00:06:45,706 --> 00:06:49,850
Where'd that get me?
[Crying] Nowhere.
130
00:06:49,885 --> 00:06:52,644
You know what?
I spoiled you. Yeah.
131
00:06:52,679 --> 00:06:55,330
I spoiled you with my love.
132
00:06:57,318 --> 00:06:59,972
Okay, dude,
this is gettin' weird.
133
00:07:00,088 --> 00:07:03,566
The only way we can even dream of
making it to Nationals this year
134
00:07:03,590 --> 00:07:07,659
is if gaming is our top priority.
And it starts right now.
135
00:07:07,694 --> 00:07:10,646
- We still have three classes left.
- It starts at 2:30.
136
00:07:10,681 --> 00:07:13,899
At 2:30, I'm going to Dantoni's
Bakery for some cinnamon puffs.
137
00:07:13,934 --> 00:07:16,268
Oh, I love Dantoni's.
138
00:07:16,303 --> 00:07:18,703
The apple puffs just
melt in your mouth.
139
00:07:18,739 --> 00:07:20,914
Guys, don't forget about
the cream puffs.
140
00:07:20,949 --> 00:07:22,666
BOTH: Oh!
141
00:07:22,702 --> 00:07:23,896
I love when they put
the drizzle on it.
142
00:07:23,920 --> 00:07:26,928
ALL: The drizzle!
143
00:07:26,963 --> 00:07:28,864
Hey, guys, guys, we get it!
144
00:07:28,899 --> 00:07:31,019
Everyone loves Dantoni's.
You can't order wrong there.
145
00:07:33,437 --> 00:07:35,477
You three are gonna be in
my basement at 2:30 sharp.
146
00:07:36,807 --> 00:07:39,007
Oh, I'll be there.
147
00:07:39,042 --> 00:07:41,527
But I'm gonna be a little late,
148
00:07:41,562 --> 00:07:44,964
- 'cause Wendell's gettin' his puff on!
- Ahem.
149
00:07:44,999 --> 00:07:47,464
Yeah. See ya at 2:30.
150
00:07:54,792 --> 00:07:56,859
Should've captured that base
by now, Ashley.
151
00:07:56,894 --> 00:07:58,852
Come on, Wendell,
take out that camper,
152
00:07:58,887 --> 00:08:00,571
and Franklin,
quit hiding in that cave.
153
00:08:00,648 --> 00:08:02,840
Can we take a break? We've
been playing for hours,
154
00:08:02,875 --> 00:08:04,441
and I need to
go to the bathroom.
155
00:08:04,476 --> 00:08:06,193
Wendell's been playing
for just as long;
156
00:08:06,228 --> 00:08:07,987
- He doesn't have to go.
- Ha! Not anymore.
157
00:08:10,725 --> 00:08:12,883
Do you guys realize
what the other squads
158
00:08:12,919 --> 00:08:14,268
are saying about us online?
159
00:08:14,303 --> 00:08:16,812
Look. "Ashley couldn't play
herself out of a paper bag."
160
00:08:16,848 --> 00:08:19,256
Not true.
161
00:08:19,292 --> 00:08:20,810
"Wendell's a raging troll who's
nothing but a team killer."
162
00:08:20,834 --> 00:08:23,986
I mean, it's true, but still.
163
00:08:24,021 --> 00:08:27,080
Yeah, yeah.
"Franklin's a weasely noob"
164
00:08:27,116 --> 00:08:28,651
who's probably afraid
of his own shadow."
165
00:08:28,675 --> 00:08:32,878
You're darn right I am.
Shadows are creepy.
166
00:08:32,914 --> 00:08:34,358
Sometimes they're big,
sometimes they're small.
167
00:08:34,382 --> 00:08:36,815
- Franklin, look.
- [screams]
168
00:08:36,851 --> 00:08:39,082
Ha! What a tool.
169
00:08:40,613 --> 00:08:42,379
Okay, okay, can we
please just focus
170
00:08:42,414 --> 00:08:44,081
and get back on the sticks?
171
00:08:44,117 --> 00:08:47,259
Why aren't you
on the sticks, Conor?
172
00:08:47,295 --> 00:08:49,820
Because I'm not the problem, Ashley.
You guys are the problem.
173
00:08:49,856 --> 00:08:51,155
You're the ones holding me back.
174
00:08:53,242 --> 00:08:55,117
We're holding you back?
175
00:08:56,729 --> 00:08:59,129
I thought we were a team.
176
00:08:59,164 --> 00:09:01,256
Yeah, it's not much of a team
177
00:09:01,292 --> 00:09:03,070
if I'm the only one making
Thumbs of Fury a priority.
178
00:09:03,094 --> 00:09:05,202
You know, sometimes,
I think I can get
179
00:09:05,237 --> 00:09:07,796
a higher team ranking by myself.
180
00:09:07,831 --> 00:09:11,476
[Gasps] Oh, you think so?
Well, why don't we find out?
181
00:09:11,511 --> 00:09:14,035
- I'm outta here.
- I'm outta here, too.
182
00:09:14,071 --> 00:09:19,675
Me, too.
And to think I got you a puff.
183
00:09:19,710 --> 00:09:25,141
- You never gave me a puff.
- Yeah, 'cause I ate it.
184
00:09:32,790 --> 00:09:36,094
Hey, gamers, so, uh, my team
walked out on me because I said
185
00:09:36,118 --> 00:09:38,927
I could do better without them,
but see, I did it for a reason.
186
00:09:38,963 --> 00:09:41,013
Because the key to being
a great leader
187
00:09:41,049 --> 00:09:43,557
is to show your team
you don't really need 'em.
188
00:09:43,593 --> 00:09:45,985
Anyway, I crunched the numbers,
and it turns out
189
00:09:46,020 --> 00:09:46,761
Thumbs of Fury still has
a chance of making it
190
00:09:46,796 --> 00:09:50,914
to Nationals if we win
20 ranked matches by Sunday.
191
00:09:50,950 --> 00:09:53,167
And by we, I mean me
and my new teammates.
192
00:09:53,202 --> 00:09:56,228
There's Bad Boy Conor.
What's up?
193
00:09:56,263 --> 00:09:59,948
There's Shy Conor. What's up?
194
00:09:59,984 --> 00:10:01,917
And there's Vaguely
European Conor.
195
00:10:01,952 --> 00:10:03,872
[Weird accent]
What's up with you now, peoples?
196
00:10:09,368 --> 00:10:12,377
Who is Conor to tell us our
priorities are out of whack?
197
00:10:12,413 --> 00:10:15,772
My priorities are totally
in whack.
198
00:10:15,808 --> 00:10:18,742
Now that I'm not busy
with Thumbs of Fury,
199
00:10:18,777 --> 00:10:21,153
I can focus on
the more important things,
200
00:10:21,189 --> 00:10:25,423
like chucking dead rats
at that hippie at the bus stop.
201
00:10:25,459 --> 00:10:28,143
Well, I told my mom I'd help her
with her plumbing business.
202
00:10:28,179 --> 00:10:29,494
- [Phone rings]
- Yeah?
203
00:10:29,529 --> 00:10:31,922
Uh-huh.
204
00:10:31,957 --> 00:10:34,249
Okay, I'm on it.
205
00:10:34,285 --> 00:10:35,946
I got a code three clog
at the Buffet Barn.
206
00:10:35,970 --> 00:10:37,511
Duty calls.
207
00:10:39,848 --> 00:10:43,192
I guess it really does.
208
00:10:43,227 --> 00:10:46,052
Free from gaming,
this might work out.
209
00:10:46,088 --> 00:10:48,125
Alice has been begging me
to spend more time with her.
210
00:10:48,149 --> 00:10:51,091
Who's Alice?
211
00:10:51,126 --> 00:10:53,811
My girlfriend who you've
already met,
212
00:10:53,846 --> 00:10:55,195
and hit on several times.
213
00:10:57,950 --> 00:11:00,142
- Huh. Doesn't ring a bell.
- [frustrated groan]
214
00:11:00,177 --> 00:11:03,111
But I did meet an Alice
at our party,
215
00:11:03,147 --> 00:11:05,981
and she was giving me
the "kiss me" eyes.
216
00:11:06,017 --> 00:11:06,882
[Watch beeping]
217
00:11:06,918 --> 00:11:09,000
I gotta go.
218
00:11:09,036 --> 00:11:10,844
The 4:15 bus is coming around,
219
00:11:10,879 --> 00:11:11,845
and the hippie is
just standing there,
220
00:11:11,880 --> 00:11:13,046
not getting hit by rats.
221
00:11:18,929 --> 00:11:22,256
- Hey, pumpkin, guess who.
- Mom?
222
00:11:23,842 --> 00:11:26,168
No.
223
00:11:26,203 --> 00:11:28,287
Country cross-over star
Shania Twain?
224
00:11:28,322 --> 00:11:31,156
No. Alice.
225
00:11:31,191 --> 00:11:33,417
Alice Cooper,
godfather of shock rock? [Gasps]
226
00:11:33,452 --> 00:11:37,398
No. Alice.
Your girlfriend?
227
00:11:38,415 --> 00:11:42,934
Oh. Alice.
I'd know those hands anywhere.
228
00:11:44,271 --> 00:11:46,471
I got our whole week planned out.
229
00:11:46,507 --> 00:11:48,874
We're gonna be spending
a lot of time together.
230
00:11:48,909 --> 00:11:50,000
I can't wait.
231
00:11:55,241 --> 00:11:57,216
Stop wearing socks with
your sandals, hippie!
232
00:12:09,680 --> 00:12:11,513
Nice shot, Conor. Thanks, Conor.
233
00:12:11,548 --> 00:12:12,648
I've got your back, Conor.
234
00:12:17,587 --> 00:12:18,707
You just got tongued, sucka.
235
00:12:20,891 --> 00:12:22,974
The controller tastes like
wet rat.
236
00:12:23,010 --> 00:12:24,034
Must be Wendell's.
237
00:12:26,881 --> 00:12:28,149
All right, scrubs, I'm gonna
take you all out.
238
00:12:28,173 --> 00:12:29,373
Butt shot.
239
00:12:34,780 --> 00:12:36,713
I always forget the power
of my own butt.
240
00:12:42,638 --> 00:12:44,513
[Sniffing]
241
00:12:44,548 --> 00:12:47,173
Oh!
242
00:12:47,209 --> 00:12:48,695
And you said a whole day
at the candle museum
243
00:12:48,719 --> 00:12:50,093
would be boring.
244
00:12:50,128 --> 00:12:52,521
Wrong!!
245
00:12:55,092 --> 00:12:57,251
I could've stayed there
for wicks.
246
00:12:57,286 --> 00:13:02,814
[Raucous laughter]
247
00:13:02,849 --> 00:13:05,209
- Get it?
- Yeah, I got it the first nine times you said it.
248
00:13:07,012 --> 00:13:09,262
Look, Franklin, I gotta go.
249
00:13:09,298 --> 00:13:10,893
I have a dentist appointment
with Dr. Shapiro.
250
00:13:10,917 --> 00:13:13,183
Correction.
251
00:13:13,219 --> 00:13:16,678
We have a dentist appointment
with Dr. Shapiro.
252
00:13:16,713 --> 00:13:18,956
I booked the chair next to you.
253
00:13:18,991 --> 00:13:21,116
Okay, this is getting a little...
254
00:13:21,151 --> 00:13:24,511
- Perfect?
- No. Creepy.
255
00:13:24,547 --> 00:13:26,921
Look, when you were busy gaming,
256
00:13:26,957 --> 00:13:29,391
it gave me a chance
to actually miss you.
257
00:13:29,426 --> 00:13:30,971
But now that I'm spending
all this time with you,
258
00:13:30,995 --> 00:13:33,136
I don't like you.
259
00:13:33,171 --> 00:13:34,938
At all.
260
00:13:38,552 --> 00:13:40,911
Who's that? She single?
261
00:13:40,946 --> 00:13:44,088
No, she's my girlfriend.
262
00:13:44,124 --> 00:13:46,583
I mean, was. It's complicated.
263
00:13:46,618 --> 00:13:48,860
She dumped your
skinny butt, didn't she?
264
00:13:48,896 --> 00:13:50,976
When you put it like that,
it's not that complicated.
265
00:13:53,350 --> 00:13:55,634
Anyway, what's up with you?
266
00:13:55,669 --> 00:13:58,103
Now that I'm not gaming anymore,
267
00:13:58,138 --> 00:14:00,358
I'm spending a lot of time
with the rats down at the dump.
268
00:14:00,382 --> 00:14:01,890
I think one of them bit me.
269
00:14:01,925 --> 00:14:03,425
See anything back there?
270
00:14:08,541 --> 00:14:11,783
I wish that was the grossest
thing I'd seen today.
271
00:14:11,818 --> 00:14:14,298
But I pulled this out of the
shower drain at the senior center.
272
00:14:21,069 --> 00:14:23,454
Looks like some of those seniors
273
00:14:23,530 --> 00:14:25,989
are losing a lot more than
their driver's license.
274
00:14:28,001 --> 00:14:30,035
Why did you keep it?
275
00:14:30,071 --> 00:14:32,329
I didn't. It followed me here.
276
00:14:38,645 --> 00:14:41,422
That's it. I miss the team.
277
00:14:41,457 --> 00:14:42,898
I miss gaming.
278
00:14:42,933 --> 00:14:44,850
I miss us.
279
00:14:44,885 --> 00:14:46,726
We took our squad for granted,
280
00:14:46,761 --> 00:14:48,954
and we let Conor down.
281
00:14:48,989 --> 00:14:51,155
I think we know what
we need to do.
282
00:14:51,191 --> 00:14:53,717
Refuse to admit we were wrong,
283
00:14:53,753 --> 00:14:57,129
and live out the rest of
our lives with painful regret.
284
00:14:57,164 --> 00:15:00,766
No. We gotta go see him
and apologize.
285
00:15:00,801 --> 00:15:03,493
Okay, but first...
286
00:15:03,528 --> 00:15:04,987
I'm poppin' that boil.
287
00:15:12,947 --> 00:15:15,172
You gotta go to a doctor.
288
00:15:15,207 --> 00:15:18,517
I've had way worse
rat boils than this.
289
00:15:28,461 --> 00:15:31,021
Come on, Conor.
Where's my support, Conor?
290
00:15:31,056 --> 00:15:33,054
I said flank him, Conor!
291
00:15:41,067 --> 00:15:44,234
Nice, Conor.
Won another one.
292
00:15:49,983 --> 00:15:52,109
I've been playing for
48 hours straight.
293
00:15:52,144 --> 00:15:55,136
Which means I'm on a roll!
294
00:15:55,172 --> 00:15:58,248
Gotta keep climbing
those rankings. Game on.
295
00:16:03,630 --> 00:16:05,005
Whoo hoo! Get it, Conor!
296
00:16:14,441 --> 00:16:16,641
Sorry, trolls, you're gonna
have to do better than that.
297
00:16:18,888 --> 00:16:21,946
Bonus.
Nothing can stop me now!
298
00:16:21,982 --> 00:16:24,191
[Snoring]
299
00:16:34,936 --> 00:16:40,290
- Conor. It's Faruq Tauheed.
- Wha?
300
00:16:40,326 --> 00:16:42,760
Faruq? What are you doing here?
301
00:16:42,836 --> 00:16:45,604
The IGL sent me over
to give you some good news.
302
00:16:45,639 --> 00:16:50,158
- Did I beat 20 teams?
- No, bro.
303
00:16:50,194 --> 00:16:52,636
You beat them all!
304
00:16:52,671 --> 00:16:54,263
Thumbs of Fury is now
ranked number one!
305
00:16:54,298 --> 00:16:56,523
[Laughs]
Yes! I did it!
306
00:16:56,558 --> 00:16:59,147
And who are these two?
307
00:17:00,020 --> 00:17:01,962
They're your two biggest fans.
308
00:17:01,997 --> 00:17:04,138
They're here to kiss you,
and present you with
309
00:17:04,174 --> 00:17:07,359
your prize check of
one trillion dollars!
310
00:17:11,757 --> 00:17:13,699
That seems a little excessive,
but all right.
311
00:17:13,734 --> 00:17:16,401
Conor, Conor...
312
00:17:16,436 --> 00:17:17,911
BOTH: Conor, Conor,
Conor, Conor!
313
00:17:20,148 --> 00:17:23,233
- Conor!
- Conor!
314
00:17:23,268 --> 00:17:25,026
Shh. Take it easy.
I'll kiss you both.
315
00:17:25,062 --> 00:17:27,645
[Kissing sounds]
316
00:17:27,681 --> 00:17:30,824
- I think we should let him sleep.
- Uh-huh.
317
00:17:30,859 --> 00:17:34,761
Look, guys, Conor's been on
a marathon gaming session.
318
00:17:34,796 --> 00:17:37,247
Look how many teams
he was trying to beat.
319
00:17:37,283 --> 00:17:39,323
Yeah, and he failed.
320
00:17:39,359 --> 00:17:43,044
Couldn't do it all on his own.
What a tool.
321
00:17:43,079 --> 00:17:44,446
I wish he had
beat all these teams.
322
00:17:44,481 --> 00:17:47,349
Then we'd be back in
contention for the Nationals.
323
00:17:47,384 --> 00:17:50,110
No wonder he's exhausted.
324
00:17:50,145 --> 00:17:53,046
He's been doing all the work
we should've been doing.
325
00:17:53,082 --> 00:17:55,857
That poor, beautiful,
sleeping angel.
326
00:17:55,892 --> 00:17:57,675
Guys...
327
00:17:57,711 --> 00:18:00,053
there's only one thing to do.
328
00:18:00,089 --> 00:18:01,707
Yeah. Shave the word
fart on the back of his head.
329
00:18:01,731 --> 00:18:03,790
On it.
330
00:18:07,271 --> 00:18:09,880
Well, well, well.
331
00:18:09,915 --> 00:18:12,040
Look who it is.
332
00:18:12,075 --> 00:18:14,009
Dead weight and the disposables.
333
00:18:16,497 --> 00:18:18,363
While you guys were off
doing who knows what...
334
00:18:18,399 --> 00:18:19,533
- I was a plumber.
- Got a rat boil.
335
00:18:19,557 --> 00:18:21,566
Dumped my girlfriend.
336
00:18:21,601 --> 00:18:26,655
I single-handedly
beat 20 ranked teams.
337
00:18:26,732 --> 00:18:28,668
I'm so good, I even beat
the last few in my sleep.
338
00:18:28,692 --> 00:18:33,411
So I guess I was right.
I was carrying this team all along.
339
00:18:33,446 --> 00:18:36,514
Oh, right, sleep gaming.
340
00:18:36,549 --> 00:18:38,575
'Cause that makes
much more sense
341
00:18:38,610 --> 00:18:41,169
than us coming in and beating
those last four teams
342
00:18:41,204 --> 00:18:42,715
while you were passed out
on your couch.
343
00:18:42,739 --> 00:18:44,739
Uh-huh, okay.
344
00:18:44,775 --> 00:18:46,708
If you guys found me
passed out on my couch,
345
00:18:46,743 --> 00:18:48,329
Wendell would've shaved
the word "fart..."
346
00:18:48,353 --> 00:18:50,712
- [yells]
- [laughing]
347
00:18:51,856 --> 00:18:54,507
It's like Abe Lincoln
always said,
348
00:18:54,542 --> 00:18:56,734
"Don't fall asleep unless
you want the word 'fart'
349
00:18:56,770 --> 00:18:59,888
- shaved into the back of your head."
- Lincoln said that?
350
00:18:59,923 --> 00:19:03,858
Why do you think he always
wore that big, weird hat?
351
00:19:04,893 --> 00:19:09,906
So you guys were there?
And you won the last matches?
352
00:19:09,941 --> 00:19:13,125
Which means I was wrong.
I couldn't do it on my own.
353
00:19:13,161 --> 00:19:17,155
When you're part of the team,
you shouldn't have to.
354
00:19:17,190 --> 00:19:18,759
Yeah, but a good leader
inspires his team,
355
00:19:18,783 --> 00:19:21,332
- and I didn't do that.
- Don't say that.
356
00:19:21,333 --> 00:19:23,870
- It's not true.
- You make me sick.
357
00:19:25,841 --> 00:19:28,966
You were right about us
not pulling our weight.
358
00:19:29,002 --> 00:19:31,461
From now on, Thumbs of Fury
is going to be our top priority.
359
00:19:31,497 --> 00:19:34,622
- [Sighs] Yeah.
- Definitely.
360
00:19:34,658 --> 00:19:37,701
That's what I like to hear.
Oh, and the good news is,
361
00:19:37,736 --> 00:19:40,812
we've now moved up to
number 498,
362
00:19:40,847 --> 00:19:42,814
which means if we
really buckle down,
363
00:19:42,849 --> 00:19:45,667
we can still earn
our ticket to Nationals.
364
00:19:45,702 --> 00:19:47,802
I'm surprised you didn't
just try and replace us.
365
00:19:47,837 --> 00:19:50,695
Wha? Are you kidding?
366
00:19:51,975 --> 00:19:54,454
Get outta here.
367
00:19:57,005 --> 00:19:59,081
I mean it. Get outta here.
368
00:19:59,617 --> 00:20:01,794
Go. Go, go!
369
00:20:07,333 --> 00:20:10,066
[Snoring]
370
00:20:10,101 --> 00:20:13,470
Conor, it's Faruq Tauheed.
371
00:20:13,505 --> 00:20:17,640
Wha?
Faruq Tauheed?
372
00:20:17,676 --> 00:20:20,043
I'm here on behalf of the IGL
with an amazing prize for you.
373
00:20:20,078 --> 00:20:24,405
Really?
Uh-huh.
374
00:20:24,441 --> 00:20:28,226
We want to name Thumbs of Fury
our spotlight team of the month.
375
00:20:28,261 --> 00:20:29,372
That's why I'm here
to present your team
376
00:20:29,396 --> 00:20:33,221
with an all-expenses paid trip
to Hawaii.
377
00:20:39,365 --> 00:20:42,783
First class.
Nice touch.
378
00:20:42,818 --> 00:20:47,303
Listen, Faruq,
I've had this dream before,
379
00:20:47,339 --> 00:20:51,049
and, uh,
I'm not falling for it again.
380
00:20:51,126 --> 00:20:53,789
Here's what I think of your
little "prize package."
381
00:20:57,273 --> 00:21:00,666
But I... Why would you...
382
00:21:00,702 --> 00:21:02,777
Bye, Faruq. Come on.
Tell it walking, dude.
383
00:21:02,813 --> 00:21:07,081
- Oh, you gonna do like that?
- Yes, I am. Yep, uh-huh.
384
00:21:07,117 --> 00:21:10,768
Bye-bye.
Buh-bye.
385
00:21:10,803 --> 00:21:13,883
Thanks for stopping
by, ladies. Call me.
386
00:21:15,601 --> 00:21:20,564
Now that I'm alone in my dream,
it's time to fly!
387
00:21:20,624 --> 00:21:22,969
Whoo!
[Thud, groans]
388
00:21:25,919 --> 00:21:30,272
Oh, no. This isn't a dream!
What have I done?
389
00:21:30,307 --> 00:21:33,508
Faruq!
Faruq, come back, man!
390
00:21:33,543 --> 00:21:35,618
[Sobbing]
I wanna go to Hawaii!
391
00:21:38,628 --> 00:21:41,683
~ Addic7ed.com ~