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sync & correction by f1nc0
~ Addic7ed.com ~
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I got one for you, Jamal.
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If you could smash any chick,
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knowing you'd get a STD,
who would you stick?
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That's a tough one, Milk.
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Hmm, probably Amber Rose.
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You sure about that, my nig?
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You really rollin' with
Wiz Khalifa's sloppies?
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All that ass?
I'll take the finger like Kanye.
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- I hope you don't lick your finger.
- You can hate on a thicky all you want.
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I knew you was
a finger-in-the-booty-ass bitch.
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You nasty, boo.
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Head's up.
Massa coming.
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Shoot that, Randy.
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Way to use the glass!
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Man, fuck y'all.
Bring me a towel, bitch.
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You sure you don't want a tampon?
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At least we finally got our
first high school game coming up.
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Our first step to being legends.
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Yup, all the beezies finna jock us
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when they see us rockin'
our jerseys, my nigs.
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We told you, Milk.
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Until your white ass proves
you got some black in you,
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that word is on
the banned substance list.
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- Got it, my nig?
- I told you, I'm Creole.
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Man, I'm tired
of all this practice.
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My body's a well-oiled machine.
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I feel you, my dude.
We talkin' about practice.
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Not a game.
Practice.
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Come on, y'all, focus up.
Coach B gonna yell at us.
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- God damn, you scary, Grover.
- Yeah, homey.
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What in the hell
you think you're doing?
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Get your asses off the floor.
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You know better than that,
Grover.
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Your brother Montrel
would be ashamed
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that you two dropped out
of the same cooch.
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And, Jamal, you're only here
to boost the team's GPA.
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And you're failing at that.
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And white boy, you're
only here because your
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stepdad bought us the
jerseys, motherfucker.
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Breath smell like he been
eatin' a dookie taco.
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1x02 - Child Please
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Yo, Randy, good practice, bro.
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Skerrt! Uh, did I give you
permission to talk to me, dog nuts?
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When I played with your bro,
if I talked out of turn,
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I'd get a thumb shoved up
my dookie shoot.
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Bet you talked out of turn
all the time.
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I'ma start calling you
"Mon-taint,"
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'cause you ain't Montrel
and you look like a taint.
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Punk-ass fresh fish.
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Damn right, Mumblemouth.
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Got 'eem.
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There you motherfuckers are.
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I need to talk to you little niglets
about failing my health class.
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If you don't get
your shit together fast,
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you motherfuckers will
be suspended
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from the motherfucking team, guys.
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What you mean, suspended?
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Basketball the only reason
we come to school.
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Yeah, come on, Coach Bundy.
Help some Black Lives Matter.
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Milk, you're white.
God helped you out, motherfucker.
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If I can't
wear my jersey to school,
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I'ma go white boy
and shoot this bitch up.
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- Damn, Milk, you ain't got no chill.
- Yeah, you already know
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- I ain't got no chill, homey.
- Ain't no need for violence.
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12 inches.
Next question.
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Hallelujah, bitch.
Nigga, I feel blessed.
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Grover, how could you...
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and not ask me?
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Yo, Grove, you gotta stop
thirsting for Randy's boo.
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You ain't even on her radar.
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Not yet.
But you know Cindy gonna be
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jockin' me once we legends.
Just watch.
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- Oh!
- Ooh!
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Hey, how do my nuts taste?
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He should've walked away.
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Nice try, skeet scrub.
Now get to the back
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of the bus with the
rest of the shit crew.
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Class, settle the fuck down.
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Now as a part of our
"Scared Celibate" curriculum,
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I will be partnering you up
to raise a goddamn baby.
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What you mean, raise a baby?
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Can't we just go to
Planned Parenthood?
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- I got a coupon!
- How am I supposed
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to go league if I got
daddy responsibilities?
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Oh, shut the fuck up!
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I present to you
the Totbot 3000.
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Now for the next week,
you gotta pretend
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this robot is
a motherfucking baby.
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Now it's time to
pair you bastards up.
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Milk, you with Shamal.
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Man, I gotta boos
with this wank-ass...
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Aight, I'ma be cool
'cause you my boy's sister,
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but I gotta tell it like it is.
I ain't doin' 'nathen.
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I'm keepin' it real,
like Grover's dad.
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That's fine,
as long as we're together.
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Jamal, I'm putting you
with Medina.
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Damn, Medina. Can a ledge
get some breathing room?
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You like a meat sweater.
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Don't get coy with me,
motherfucker.
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We together, so you better get
used to me gettin' up inside you.
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Cindy, I think
it'd be good for you
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- to be paired up with... Grover.
- Oh, word?
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Come on, Coach. You know
Cindy and I belong together.
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- She's my lady.
- Nice try, motherfucker,
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but we've got our first game
this week.
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We don't need you sticking
your energy in the wrong place.
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So your partner is LaDante.
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We progressive
like a motherfucker.
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Brandy, you gonna be
my wife for life.
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On Oakland.
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Nooo!
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I was thinking we treat this
more like a side family.
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You take care of the baby,
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and I'll slide through
on nights and weekends.
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If you eat with your family,
I'll buy you lunch.
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Oh, okay.
One of these, one of those.
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Aight, but let's go grub
somewhere on the low low.
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We don't need all these squares
in our circle.
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I know a romantic spot.
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More tater tots, motherfucker!
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I'm eating for two...
and the baby.
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You heard the lady.
Run the meatloaf, bitch.
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Look, Randy, I take
this parenting shit serious.
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This my tenth year doing
this project at Duncan.
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I expect you to be a good mommy
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and visit this little nigga
early and often.
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Y-you got it, LaDante.
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Whatever you need.
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And if you don't fulfill
your duties as my play wife,
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that ass is mine.
Feel me?
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I'll hold the baby.
You hold my belt loop, boo.
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Mmm.
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Come on, little LeBronya,
stop cockblocking on Daddy.
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Here, give her to me.
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It's obvious you have
no idea what you're doing.
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There, there, sweetie.
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Mommy has you.
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I guess you got the touch.
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You should try
touching these... nuts.
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Boy, please.
You know I'm with Randy.
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And I am not
looking to downgrade.
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You ain't downgrading.
You're investing early in a sure thing.
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And I'ma prove it to you,
if you let me take you out.
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Well, be a good baby daddy,
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help me ace this class,
and... we'll see.
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Girl, you about to get
a A and a meal at Golden Corral.
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And now, your starting lineup...
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Your boy, Montrel Cummings.
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Fuck that.
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Well, look at you,
trying to be all grown and shit.
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Just trying to make sure
I pass this class
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- so I can stay on the squad.
- Yo, what you doing?
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Which one of you lazy negroes
ate my last Munchable?
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Oh, it's like that, huh?
Nobody got nothin' to say?
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I buy the groceries,
I paid for the couch,
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I even paid for the cable so
the white man can distract you
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from the real issues with
this mindless basketball game,
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and all I ask is
you don't eat my Munchables!
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Man, why you trippin', little bro?
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You don't like crackers, anyway.
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00:07:02,810 --> 00:07:04,715
- Oh, we being funny?
- Man, just relax.
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Soon as I get
my NCAA reparations
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from the homey Ed O'Bannon's
lawsuit, I'll buy you
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Munchables, Brunchables,
and Dinnables.
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Fool, you play intramurals
at a junior college.
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The only check you getting
is a reality check,
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you broke-ass negro.
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I got buckets, though, nigga.
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Whatever.
I gotta go punch in.
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Apparently me and Mom
are the only people
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in this house putting in work.
Deuces.
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Stay black.
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Cheer practice just ended, Grover.
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I hope you don't mind me
showing up.
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Oh, okay. I ain't know
we was expecting company.
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I'll be right back.
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What's good, girl?
I'm Montrel, local hoops legend.
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Ha-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch.
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Come on, 'Trel.
This is my baby momma.
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Baby momma?
Man, the only thing
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getting pregnant around here
is your sock, Crunchy.
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Nasty. Anyway, how did
everything go with the baby?
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- Did she cry much?
- Yeah, but I fed her, burped her,
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changed her diaper,
and sang her some of that
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00:07:58,740 --> 00:08:00,405
new Taylor Swift
until she stopped.
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00:08:00,440 --> 00:08:03,075
You really hitting them high
notes like that, Grover?
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00:08:03,110 --> 00:08:05,235
You already know, boo.
Anything for our baby.
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00:08:05,245 --> 00:08:09,015
You're really taking this
serious, Grover. I like that.
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00:08:09,050 --> 00:08:11,675
Mm.
Later, new booty.
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00:08:12,520 --> 00:08:15,515
She want my pipe, guaranteed.
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00:08:19,525 --> 00:08:21,385
Oh.
193
00:08:22,290 --> 00:08:23,455
There we go.
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00:08:23,465 --> 00:08:25,595
Hey, Mom, you gotta take care
of this mark-ass baby
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00:08:25,630 --> 00:08:27,265
if we finna pass this class.
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00:08:27,300 --> 00:08:30,635
Of course, Milky.
Has Mommy ever let you down?
197
00:08:30,670 --> 00:08:33,065
Yeah, you have, when you
married that lame Uncle Joey.
198
00:08:33,100 --> 00:08:35,905
How many times have I told you?
My name is Dave.
199
00:08:35,940 --> 00:08:38,075
Well, you look like
that square from "Full House,"
200
00:08:38,110 --> 00:08:40,945
so you Uncle Joey to me, buster.
Now step out my kitchen.
201
00:08:40,980 --> 00:08:43,875
Milton, don't make me pull out
the mortgage paperwork
202
00:08:43,885 --> 00:08:45,545
to clarify who owns this house.
203
00:08:45,580 --> 00:08:48,385
See how white folk always be
referring to paperwork and shit?
204
00:08:48,420 --> 00:08:50,515
Come on, Milk,
we're in this together.
205
00:08:50,525 --> 00:08:52,755
I already been done
told you, Shamal.
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00:08:52,790 --> 00:08:56,255
- That baby ain't mine.
- Milky, don't talk to her like that.
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00:08:56,290 --> 00:08:59,425
Why don't I help you
with the baby, Shamal?
208
00:08:59,460 --> 00:09:01,895
Well, I guess so, if that's
the way Milk's gonna be.
209
00:09:01,930 --> 00:09:04,365
Cool, I'm about to go make
some stomach pancakes
210
00:09:04,400 --> 00:09:06,735
right quick.
See about me.
211
00:09:07,135 --> 00:09:09,535
I can't even come up
with no lies.
212
00:09:09,570 --> 00:09:11,775
- Jamal love the kids.
- You a great daddy, Jamal.
213
00:09:11,810 --> 00:09:13,945
And I'ma take care of
all your needs and things.
214
00:09:13,980 --> 00:09:15,475
That's cool, Medina.
215
00:09:15,510 --> 00:09:16,575
But you gotsta be gone.
216
00:09:16,610 --> 00:09:18,715
You ain't gonna invite me
inside to meet your parents?
217
00:09:18,750 --> 00:09:21,232
You trippin', boo. It
won't be as fun if we allow
218
00:09:21,233 --> 00:09:23,715
our relationship to venture
into the human dimension.
219
00:09:23,725 --> 00:09:25,155
We gotta keep our shit spiritual.
220
00:09:25,190 --> 00:09:27,785
You better not be trying
to play me with all that talk.
221
00:09:27,795 --> 00:09:30,363
- I know how niggas do.
- Go on now, boo.
222
00:09:30,398 --> 00:09:32,665
You finna find out
about me soon enough.
223
00:09:32,700 --> 00:09:34,495
Ya heard?
224
00:09:40,000 --> 00:09:42,535
I been holding that in all day.
225
00:09:46,915 --> 00:09:48,815
Ahh, look who woke up.
226
00:09:48,850 --> 00:09:51,045
You know, LaDante,
it's only one class, man.
227
00:09:51,080 --> 00:09:53,285
We... we don't have to
spend 24 hours together.
228
00:09:53,320 --> 00:09:56,455
Shut your ass up, wifey.
229
00:09:56,490 --> 00:09:58,315
I made eggs.
230
00:09:58,325 --> 00:10:01,555
You want patties, links,
or sausage?
231
00:10:01,590 --> 00:10:03,295
I-I should probably
just get home.
232
00:10:03,330 --> 00:10:05,395
Then it's links, nigga.
233
00:10:08,000 --> 00:10:09,835
All right, all right,
settle down.
234
00:10:09,870 --> 00:10:10,865
Now, when you have a baby,
235
00:10:10,900 --> 00:10:12,235
you need motherfucking
insurance.
236
00:10:12,270 --> 00:10:15,905
That's why you gotta enroll these
little bastards in Robamacare.
237
00:10:15,940 --> 00:10:18,335
Robamacare? Come on,
Coach, they're just robots.
238
00:10:18,345 --> 00:10:19,375
Did I fucking ask you?
239
00:10:19,410 --> 00:10:22,875
One of the utmost concerns
you'll have as a father, Randy,
240
00:10:22,910 --> 00:10:24,615
is deciding upon
the health care options
241
00:10:24,650 --> 00:10:28,085
that you'd like to provide
for your goddamn child!
242
00:10:28,120 --> 00:10:30,315
Watch your tone, Coach.
She with me now.
243
00:10:30,325 --> 00:10:31,855
Okay, okay, no disrespect.
244
00:10:31,890 --> 00:10:34,155
Now, apparently these
motherfucking robot babies
245
00:10:34,190 --> 00:10:36,725
can get sick like real
motherfucking babies.
246
00:10:36,760 --> 00:10:38,155
So I'll be
passing out these kits
247
00:10:38,165 --> 00:10:40,825
for y'all to do the vaccinations
your goddamn selves.
248
00:10:40,835 --> 00:10:42,835
I don't want to do
vaccinations, Milk.
249
00:10:42,870 --> 00:10:44,965
Jenny McCarthy says
they're linked to autism.
250
00:10:45,000 --> 00:10:48,265
Aye, Jenny McCarthy's
the smartest bitch in Hollywood.
251
00:10:48,275 --> 00:10:50,135
Fuck Robamacare.
252
00:10:51,210 --> 00:10:52,035
We need to talk.
253
00:10:52,045 --> 00:10:53,945
I know.
I'm happy we doing this too.
254
00:10:53,980 --> 00:10:55,675
What we gonna do with the baby
tonight during the game?
255
00:10:55,710 --> 00:10:58,745
Can't you just let it chill
in the girls' locker room...
256
00:10:58,780 --> 00:11:00,645
- or your car?
- What?
257
00:11:00,655 --> 00:11:02,015
You're not leaving our child
in no locker.
258
00:11:02,050 --> 00:11:04,185
No, I was just playin', baby.
You know I'll take care of it.
259
00:11:04,220 --> 00:11:06,385
All right, Grover, I trust you.
You better not screw this up
260
00:11:06,420 --> 00:11:08,855
and mess up my streak of
straight A's.
261
00:11:14,635 --> 00:11:15,695
This should do the trick.
262
00:11:15,730 --> 00:11:18,535
- What's all that noise for?
- The baby's sick, Milk.
263
00:11:18,570 --> 00:11:20,535
Looks like measles
or something like that.
264
00:11:20,570 --> 00:11:22,975
Better stuff a sock in
that little mark's mouth.
265
00:11:23,010 --> 00:11:23,905
Yo, Mom, guess what?
266
00:11:23,940 --> 00:11:26,775
You watchin' Grover's baby
for the game tonight too.
267
00:11:26,810 --> 00:11:29,945
Oh, would love to.
Shamal and I can make it a party.
268
00:11:29,980 --> 00:11:32,315
That sounds like a great idea,
Mrs. Milk.
269
00:11:32,350 --> 00:11:35,285
We should have a party for
all the babies in class.
270
00:11:35,320 --> 00:11:38,415
What do we look like, Brangelina?
No more kids!
271
00:11:38,425 --> 00:11:39,725
Why you frontin', Uncle Joey?
272
00:11:39,760 --> 00:11:42,455
Always stepping on
the gators of some pimpin'.
273
00:11:42,490 --> 00:11:43,795
Look, man, I'm just sayin'.
274
00:11:43,830 --> 00:11:45,425
There were no black people
on "The Flintstones,"
275
00:11:45,460 --> 00:11:47,195
and there were definitely no
black people on "The Jetsons."
276
00:11:47,230 --> 00:11:49,695
We have no past
and we have no future.
277
00:11:49,730 --> 00:11:50,565
We do not exist.
278
00:11:50,600 --> 00:11:53,035
Turn the heat down and
let that simmer for a minute.
279
00:11:53,070 --> 00:11:55,435
Oh, it's simmering, my man.
280
00:11:56,640 --> 00:11:58,405
Um, excuse me.
281
00:11:58,440 --> 00:12:01,305
I was wondering.
Do you have "that"?
282
00:12:01,315 --> 00:12:05,615
Depends.
Do you have that cash?
283
00:12:07,315 --> 00:12:08,245
Another satisfied devil.
284
00:12:08,255 --> 00:12:10,115
Yo, Malik,
I need you to do me a favor
285
00:12:10,150 --> 00:12:12,485
and watch the baby for a few.
My first game is tonight.
286
00:12:12,520 --> 00:12:14,785
You kiddin', right? You know
I'm only eight years old.
287
00:12:14,795 --> 00:12:15,895
You should be watching me.
288
00:12:15,930 --> 00:12:18,295
Come on, little bro.
I ain't got no other options.
289
00:12:18,330 --> 00:12:19,295
Sounds like a YP, bro.
290
00:12:19,330 --> 00:12:21,425
I told you, you wasn't ready
to be a man like me.
291
00:12:21,435 --> 00:12:23,465
Now, if you don't mind,
I got a corner to manage.
292
00:12:23,500 --> 00:12:25,735
You bad for business.
293
00:12:25,770 --> 00:12:28,405
I hate robots.
A Roomba took my mom's job.
294
00:12:31,845 --> 00:12:33,845
Yo, 'Trel,
I got a favor to ask.
295
00:12:33,880 --> 00:12:35,945
I need you to watch my baby
while I'm at the game.
296
00:12:35,980 --> 00:12:38,615
Hmm, what does Uncle
'Trel get in return?
297
00:12:38,650 --> 00:12:40,585
- What you want?
- How about 50 bucks?
298
00:12:40,620 --> 00:12:42,285
50 bucks?
Montrel, you know
299
00:12:42,320 --> 00:12:43,815
I ain't got that
kind of dough on me.
300
00:12:43,825 --> 00:12:46,485
I'll give you anything else.
Just name it.
301
00:12:46,520 --> 00:12:47,685
Hmm.
302
00:12:47,695 --> 00:12:48,995
Let me get your social.
303
00:12:49,030 --> 00:12:50,925
- What?
- Sometimes Montrel has to
304
00:12:50,960 --> 00:12:53,325
become someone
other than Montrel.
305
00:12:54,500 --> 00:12:57,135
Duncan, Duncan, we're the best.
306
00:12:57,170 --> 00:12:59,365
Let's go, Blackies, DHS.
307
00:12:59,400 --> 00:13:01,665
Work that black D, baby!
308
00:13:04,610 --> 00:13:07,075
Our first
high school basketball game.
309
00:13:07,110 --> 00:13:08,445
We about to get our nuts.
310
00:13:08,480 --> 00:13:11,015
Yeah, I only missed, like,
three lay-ups in warm-ups,
311
00:13:11,050 --> 00:13:12,015
so I'm ready to go.
312
00:13:12,050 --> 00:13:13,685
How much y'all think
you finna drop tonight?
313
00:13:13,720 --> 00:13:14,815
Numbers don't mean nothing.
314
00:13:14,850 --> 00:13:17,115
I just need a couple of
highlights on Hoopsmixtape.
315
00:13:17,125 --> 00:13:18,855
I gotta have at least 16 points,
316
00:13:18,890 --> 00:13:21,425
since Montrel dropped 15
in his debut.
317
00:13:21,460 --> 00:13:23,795
Yeah, that dude was a legend.
318
00:13:26,130 --> 00:13:28,625
Nah, you too young to
puff on this dohja.
319
00:13:29,670 --> 00:13:32,095
I guess one hit won't hurt
the little niglet.
320
00:13:32,105 --> 00:13:33,965
Just don't tell yo dad.
321
00:13:36,470 --> 00:13:38,775
I don't know what it is,
322
00:13:38,810 --> 00:13:41,905
but something's tellin' me,
we ain't finna get no burn.
323
00:13:41,915 --> 00:13:43,815
Yo, as long as we don't get in,
324
00:13:43,850 --> 00:13:46,315
- our stats can't get messed up.
- Yeah, but let's be real.
325
00:13:46,350 --> 00:13:48,545
Everyone at school gonna think
we some benchwarmers.
326
00:13:48,555 --> 00:13:49,685
Hey, ref!
327
00:13:49,720 --> 00:13:52,267
You better start
calling some fouls for my wife,
328
00:13:52,302 --> 00:13:54,885
or I'ma see your ass in the
parking lot.
329
00:13:54,895 --> 00:13:58,695
Damn, LaDante taking
this parenting shit serious.
330
00:13:58,730 --> 00:14:01,725
- Hey, where yo baby at, Grover?
- I left him with Montrel.
331
00:14:01,735 --> 00:14:03,695
- Say what, my nig?
- Aye, Grove, you do realize
332
00:14:03,705 --> 00:14:06,705
you off the team
if you kill yo baby, right?
333
00:14:11,710 --> 00:14:14,545
Shit, I'm out of rollin' paper.
334
00:14:25,325 --> 00:14:27,125
Hey, man,
how you turn this thing off?
335
00:14:27,160 --> 00:14:28,855
Maybe you just overheated.
336
00:14:32,265 --> 00:14:34,937
Man, I'm so fucked up.
337
00:14:37,935 --> 00:14:39,335
Oh, no, no.
Oh, man.
338
00:14:39,370 --> 00:14:41,535
Montrel, what did you do
to my baby?
339
00:14:42,780 --> 00:14:45,305
I was just ripping fat
bong hits out of his ass,
340
00:14:45,315 --> 00:14:47,475
and then he started crying
like a little bitch.
341
00:14:47,485 --> 00:14:49,715
So I started shaking him
like I'm doing now.
342
00:14:50,855 --> 00:14:53,155
Gimme that.
343
00:14:55,085 --> 00:14:58,025
Oh, damn. Cindy thought I
looked sexy in my jersey.
344
00:14:59,490 --> 00:15:01,695
Wait a minute. She's
coming over to see LeBronya.
345
00:15:01,730 --> 00:15:03,665
I can't let her
see our baby like this.
346
00:15:03,700 --> 00:15:05,565
Montrel, you have to help me.
347
00:15:06,270 --> 00:15:08,395
I got a hook-up
that might help you out.
348
00:15:10,240 --> 00:15:12,235
Montrel, what's up, buddy boy?
349
00:15:12,270 --> 00:15:15,175
I got some technical nerd shit
for you, Brazy B.
350
00:15:15,210 --> 00:15:16,945
I wanted to see if
you could take a look at
351
00:15:16,980 --> 00:15:19,545
- my little bro's baby.
- No problem, buddy boy.
352
00:15:19,580 --> 00:15:21,775
- What's the matter with this guy?
- I don't know.
353
00:15:21,785 --> 00:15:24,715
It keeps shutting on and off
and acting all fidgety.
354
00:15:24,750 --> 00:15:26,355
Oh, yeah, buddy boy.
355
00:15:26,390 --> 00:15:28,155
This battery has liquid damage.
356
00:15:28,190 --> 00:15:31,655
Mm.
Tastes like Strawberry Brohito.
357
00:15:31,690 --> 00:15:32,795
Nah, don't look at me.
358
00:15:32,830 --> 00:15:35,555
You know I don't drink
that bitch-flavored bullshit.
359
00:15:35,565 --> 00:15:38,695
It looks like the baby has
Power Down Syndrome.
360
00:15:38,730 --> 00:15:40,565
My baby has
Power Down Syndrome?
361
00:15:40,600 --> 00:15:42,035
I'm off the team now for sho.
362
00:15:42,070 --> 00:15:44,635
Oh, no, no, no, no, don't worry.
I can fix, buddy boy.
363
00:15:44,670 --> 00:15:47,905
But, uh, it's gonna cost you
about 300... plus tax.
364
00:15:47,940 --> 00:15:51,245
$300?
But what about my Robamacare?
365
00:15:53,010 --> 00:15:54,145
I don't know what to do.
366
00:15:54,180 --> 00:15:56,685
If Coach sees this,
you know I'm off the squad.
367
00:15:56,720 --> 00:15:59,285
And if Cindy see it, I ain't
never gonna get my meat moist.
368
00:15:59,320 --> 00:16:01,985
At least your baby ain't
looking like no Benjamin Button.
369
00:16:02,020 --> 00:16:04,355
I don't know what
y'all complaining for.
370
00:16:04,390 --> 00:16:05,385
You did it to yourselves.
371
00:16:05,395 --> 00:16:06,895
Grover, you know
you wasn't supposed to
372
00:16:06,930 --> 00:16:09,155
leave your fate
in the hands of Montrel.
373
00:16:09,165 --> 00:16:12,495
And Milk, acting all uppity with
being an anti-vaxxer and all that.
374
00:16:12,530 --> 00:16:14,095
Oh, shit.
Here comes Cindy.
375
00:16:14,105 --> 00:16:17,165
What's up, Grover?
Where's my little munchkin?
376
00:16:17,200 --> 00:16:18,565
This is where we bounce.
377
00:16:18,575 --> 00:16:21,375
- Come here, LeBronya.
- Uh... here you go.
378
00:16:21,410 --> 00:16:24,505
Ew, why does my baby
look like Forest Whitaker?
379
00:16:24,515 --> 00:16:25,545
What are you talking about?
380
00:16:25,580 --> 00:16:28,015
Our baby's always
looked like Forest Whitaker.
381
00:16:28,050 --> 00:16:31,185
Okay, I ain't gonna lie to you.
I let Montrel watch the baby,
382
00:16:31,220 --> 00:16:33,915
and he may or may not have
spilled flavored beer on her,
383
00:16:33,950 --> 00:16:36,010
and may or may not have
used her as a bong.
384
00:16:36,045 --> 00:16:38,225
Grover, that's the dumbest
thing you could have done.
385
00:16:38,260 --> 00:16:39,325
What do you want me to do?
386
00:16:39,360 --> 00:16:41,255
You needed to cheer,
and I had a game to play.
387
00:16:41,265 --> 00:16:43,395
You mean,
you had a game to watch.
388
00:16:44,700 --> 00:16:47,535
If I fail this class, ooh,
I will never forgive you!
389
00:16:47,570 --> 00:16:50,865
Damn, homey, you ain't
never gonna smash now.
390
00:16:50,875 --> 00:16:53,105
- Believe dat.
- Stupid baby. It's your fault
391
00:16:53,140 --> 00:16:54,135
I ain't gonna get laid.
392
00:16:54,145 --> 00:16:56,375
Man, y'all some
professional passengers.
393
00:16:56,410 --> 00:16:58,275
Time for me to take the wheel.
394
00:17:23,240 --> 00:17:24,565
Man, that didn't do shit.
395
00:17:24,575 --> 00:17:27,175
My baby still rustier
than a motherfucker.
396
00:17:27,210 --> 00:17:29,905
I failed you, my nigs.
397
00:17:37,650 --> 00:17:40,385
I don't now
what's wrong with my baby.
398
00:17:40,420 --> 00:17:42,585
- I think it's dying.
- Oh, Shamal.
399
00:17:42,620 --> 00:17:45,425
Every woman loses a baby or two
in her lifetime.
400
00:17:45,460 --> 00:17:47,595
I'm more upset that
Milk doesn't care.
401
00:17:47,630 --> 00:17:50,795
Shamal, let me hold that mark
right quick.
402
00:17:50,830 --> 00:17:52,365
Aye, yo, Mom,
403
00:17:52,400 --> 00:17:54,035
bring me some of them
hand sanitizers.
404
00:17:54,070 --> 00:17:56,165
This baby chaffin' all over me.
405
00:17:56,200 --> 00:17:58,405
- What up, my dudes?
- Not a damn thing.
406
00:17:58,440 --> 00:18:00,505
Got a Forest Whitaker baby,
lost my boo Cindy,
407
00:18:00,540 --> 00:18:02,975
and once I fail this class, I'm
gonna get kicked off the team.
408
00:18:03,010 --> 00:18:04,905
Man, ever since we had to be
responsible parents,
409
00:18:04,915 --> 00:18:07,115
our lives have been suckin'
some chicken dicks.
410
00:18:07,150 --> 00:18:08,715
Now I see why
dudes in the league
411
00:18:08,750 --> 00:18:09,985
don't hang out with they kids.
412
00:18:10,020 --> 00:18:12,615
Just get rid of him.
You already failing.
413
00:18:12,650 --> 00:18:14,855
Aye, he's right.
Can I kick it?
414
00:18:14,890 --> 00:18:16,125
Yes, you can.
415
00:18:16,160 --> 00:18:18,255
- Can I kick it?
- Yes, you can.
416
00:18:18,290 --> 00:18:21,055
Then I'm gone.
417
00:18:25,600 --> 00:18:27,435
Y'all would be
some goddamn kickers.
418
00:18:27,470 --> 00:18:29,865
I'm a quarterback, bitch.
Tebow.
419
00:18:29,900 --> 00:18:32,465
- Jamal! What the hell you doin'?
- Oh.
420
00:18:38,910 --> 00:18:41,045
Touchdown!
421
00:18:41,080 --> 00:18:42,745
No, no, no, no touchdown.
422
00:18:42,780 --> 00:18:44,615
She didn't complete the process.
423
00:18:44,650 --> 00:18:47,345
- Let's go to instant replay.
- Upon further review of the play...
424
00:18:47,346 --> 00:18:50,325
...stands.
425
00:18:50,360 --> 00:18:51,225
What him say?
426
00:18:51,260 --> 00:18:53,925
I said, upon
further review of the play...
427
00:18:53,960 --> 00:18:57,165
...stands.
428
00:19:02,405 --> 00:19:04,835
We did it, yeah!
429
00:19:04,870 --> 00:19:08,835
- Oh, no.
- What you mean, "Oh, no"?
430
00:19:13,210 --> 00:19:15,915
Motherfucker, my baby.
431
00:19:15,950 --> 00:19:19,415
Damn, damn, damn!
432
00:19:29,895 --> 00:19:31,765
- I'm sorry, boo.
- Stop with the "boo" thing.
433
00:19:31,800 --> 00:19:33,195
You ruined my streak
of straight As.
434
00:19:33,230 --> 00:19:35,395
So if you think
we're gonna be boos,
435
00:19:35,405 --> 00:19:37,365
you're as high as your brother.
436
00:19:41,610 --> 00:19:43,575
Now I'm gonna have to
go to that school
437
00:19:43,610 --> 00:19:45,375
Lil' Romeo be rappin' about.
438
00:19:45,410 --> 00:19:49,345
- The hell happened to your Totbots?
- They all dead, Coach.
439
00:19:49,380 --> 00:19:51,545
I'm at peace with it.
Our baby led a good life.
440
00:19:51,555 --> 00:19:53,185
Wait a minute.
All your robots are dead?
441
00:19:53,220 --> 00:19:55,315
Shit, that means
I gotta teach summer school.
442
00:19:55,325 --> 00:19:57,285
I was supposed to be
going to Detroit.
443
00:19:57,320 --> 00:19:58,225
Think, motherfucker.
444
00:19:58,260 --> 00:20:00,225
You know what?
I'm grading on a curve.
445
00:20:00,260 --> 00:20:01,495
All y'all get A's.
446
00:20:03,230 --> 00:20:06,025
Now get the fuck
out my classroom.
447
00:20:07,230 --> 00:20:09,335
Yo, Cindy,
can I holler right quick?
448
00:20:09,370 --> 00:20:10,465
What do you want, Grover?
449
00:20:10,500 --> 00:20:12,905
I just wanted to apologize
again for killing our baby.
450
00:20:12,940 --> 00:20:15,235
I promise it won't ever
happen again.
451
00:20:15,245 --> 00:20:16,705
Unless... you want it to.
452
00:20:16,740 --> 00:20:18,675
- What?
- Your body, your choice.
453
00:20:18,710 --> 00:20:21,145
The point is,
I'm not ready to be a daddy.
454
00:20:21,180 --> 00:20:24,915
But I am ready to be your man.
Trust and believe.
455
00:20:24,950 --> 00:20:29,555
You ain't a legend.
Yet.
456
00:20:33,030 --> 00:20:35,695
The games are way more
enjoyable with no kids.
457
00:20:35,730 --> 00:20:38,395
Yeah, that's why when
we start beating real cakes,
458
00:20:38,430 --> 00:20:39,295
we gotta strap up.
459
00:20:39,330 --> 00:20:42,435
Or just make sure our
pull-out game is strong, ya dig?
460
00:20:42,470 --> 00:20:43,565
Hold up.
Massa comin'.
461
00:20:43,600 --> 00:20:45,765
You motherfuckers better stop
all this jaw-jacking
462
00:20:45,775 --> 00:20:48,935
and pay attention to
the goddamn game.
463
00:20:49,840 --> 00:20:52,375
I got a bad tooth,
motherfuckers.
464
00:20:56,005 --> 00:20:59,686
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