1 00:00:16,939 --> 00:00:18,889 Butt! Butt! Butt! 2 00:00:18,890 --> 00:00:20,840 Headbutt Man, you are the man! 3 00:00:22,610 --> 00:00:24,977 Hell yeah! I feel amazing! 4 00:00:25,012 --> 00:00:27,746 There's nothing... literally nothing... 5 00:00:27,782 --> 00:00:30,583 I can't smash with my head! 6 00:00:30,618 --> 00:00:32,284 Oh, hey, Butt, what about a unicorn? 7 00:00:32,320 --> 00:00:35,387 Oh, yeah! Let's take this party to the next level! 8 00:00:35,456 --> 00:00:38,724 Someone bring me a bucket of tequila and a unicorn! 9 00:00:38,759 --> 00:00:41,660 - Oh, man. - Listen up, people. 10 00:00:41,696 --> 00:00:44,497 We just closed the Tustin Soccer Land account. 11 00:00:44,532 --> 00:00:48,432 - Tonight we celebrate at Milligan's. - Oh, hey, Linda, is it cool 12 00:00:48,467 --> 00:00:50,703 if I bring my buddy Headbutt Man, Wrecker of Skulls, 13 00:00:50,738 --> 00:00:53,038 Smasher of Art, Destroyer of Bars and Restaurants? 14 00:00:53,074 --> 00:00:55,074 He's my old war buddy from Zephyria, 15 00:00:55,109 --> 00:00:56,809 and he's coming to visit me this weekend. 16 00:00:56,844 --> 00:00:58,878 I mean, he can drink a battlemammoth under the table, 17 00:00:58,913 --> 00:01:01,680 and then he headbutts everything. 18 00:01:01,716 --> 00:01:03,849 Oh, that sounds like a terrible idea. 19 00:01:03,918 --> 00:01:06,685 But at Milligan's, I'm not Boss Linda. 20 00:01:06,721 --> 00:01:08,487 I'm Slayer Linda! 21 00:01:08,523 --> 00:01:10,489 And Slayer Linda's a little more pro-destruction. 22 00:01:10,525 --> 00:01:13,893 Slayer Linda makes me... uncomfortable. 23 00:01:13,928 --> 00:01:16,128 - Yeah, you told HR. - Oh! 24 00:01:16,163 --> 00:01:17,830 Check out 25 00:01:17,865 --> 00:01:19,999 what Butt did to the world's largest domino display. 26 00:01:21,035 --> 00:01:23,369 Ooh-hoo-hoo! Yeah! 27 00:01:26,841 --> 00:01:27,540 Todd, look! 28 00:01:30,309 --> 00:01:33,313 sync & correction by f1nc0 ~ Addic7ed.com ~ 29 00:01:35,116 --> 00:01:37,383 - Oh, hey, Layla. - Hey. 30 00:01:37,418 --> 00:01:39,218 - What's up? - Uh, did you hear about 31 00:01:39,253 --> 00:01:41,053 - Shannon's party? - Yeah. 32 00:01:41,088 --> 00:01:43,122 I'm actually kind of torn, 'cause, on the one hand, 33 00:01:43,157 --> 00:01:44,657 - Shannon's, like, the worst. - Yeah. 34 00:01:44,692 --> 00:01:47,226 But on the other hand, I hate parties, so... 35 00:01:47,261 --> 00:01:50,629 Right. You want to go? 36 00:01:50,665 --> 00:01:53,333 - To the party? - Yeah. Or we could just 37 00:01:53,334 --> 00:01:57,069 go and be stupid and wear our pants backwards. 38 00:01:57,104 --> 00:02:00,005 Yeah, yeah, I mean, we could... we could try to get in, 39 00:02:00,041 --> 00:02:02,207 but I don't know if they let in freaks. 40 00:02:02,243 --> 00:02:05,578 - Freaks? - Yeah, you know, like you and me. 41 00:02:05,613 --> 00:02:08,280 Oh, yeah. Yeah, we're totally freaks. 42 00:02:08,316 --> 00:02:09,982 Anyway, I should probably go. 43 00:02:10,017 --> 00:02:13,118 - But, uh, maybe I'll see you there. - Yeah. 44 00:02:13,154 --> 00:02:15,688 Yeah, I'll see you there, freak! 45 00:02:19,327 --> 00:02:20,826 All right, here we go. 46 00:02:20,861 --> 00:02:24,504 Flight tracker says Headbutt Man landed 20 minutes ago. 47 00:02:24,568 --> 00:02:26,332 Butt! Butt! Butt! Butt! 48 00:02:26,367 --> 00:02:27,600 Wh-Why aren't you guys chanting? 49 00:02:27,635 --> 00:02:30,803 Uh, maybe because you just told us he was coming three hours ago. 50 00:02:30,871 --> 00:02:33,038 - And staying with you. - That's right. Yes, thank you. 51 00:02:33,074 --> 00:02:34,773 Well, I-I can't let him stay with me. 52 00:02:34,809 --> 00:02:36,942 No, he'd destroy the place. And I rent. 53 00:02:36,978 --> 00:02:38,777 So, is this protected enough? 54 00:02:38,813 --> 00:02:41,413 - Uh, you tell me. - Oh... 55 00:02:41,449 --> 00:02:42,680 - Really? - Remember back in Zephyria, 56 00:02:42,683 --> 00:02:45,117 when he headbutted that giant hole in the ground, 57 00:02:45,152 --> 00:02:47,653 and then we all got wasted and started dropping elves into the hole? 58 00:02:47,688 --> 00:02:49,955 Yes, I remember committing elficide. 59 00:02:49,991 --> 00:02:53,392 Oh, man, I can't wait to go berserk with Butt at my work party. 60 00:02:53,427 --> 00:02:54,693 Hey, you know what, 61 00:02:54,729 --> 00:02:56,595 you guys should come rage with us, too, you know. 62 00:02:56,631 --> 00:03:00,165 - Craig and I are not raging. - No. We're gonna stay in, relax, 63 00:03:00,201 --> 00:03:02,101 maybe open one of our cheeses of the month. 64 00:03:02,136 --> 00:03:04,803 - Mmm. - Ugh! This is exactly why I can't wait 65 00:03:04,839 --> 00:03:06,405 for Headbutt Man to get here. 66 00:03:06,440 --> 00:03:08,407 This has been my life since I got to Orange County: 67 00:03:08,442 --> 00:03:11,076 dinner parties, bike rides, avocado toast, 68 00:03:11,112 --> 00:03:14,647 - uh, the dumb happy look on Craig's face. - Oh. 69 00:03:14,682 --> 00:03:16,248 The dumb hurt look on Craig's face. 70 00:03:16,283 --> 00:03:20,162 - I am bored out of my friggin' mind! - I'm so sorry 71 00:03:20,197 --> 00:03:22,087 that you feel like your best days are behind you, 72 00:03:22,123 --> 00:03:25,824 - but I love it here, and I never look back. - Well, if young Edie 73 00:03:25,860 --> 00:03:27,493 could hear you say that, she would stomp you 74 00:03:27,528 --> 00:03:29,928 with her awesome giant demon boots. 75 00:03:29,964 --> 00:03:30,829 It's called growing up. 76 00:03:30,865 --> 00:03:32,765 Maybe if Headbutt Man had done it, 77 00:03:32,800 --> 00:03:34,600 he'd still be married to Headbutt Woman. 78 00:03:34,635 --> 00:03:36,435 Aw, come on, why you got to rag on Butt? 79 00:03:36,470 --> 00:03:39,638 - What'd he ever do to you? - He headbutted me. 80 00:03:39,674 --> 00:03:42,875 Well, I for one am looking forward to meeting this gentleman. 81 00:03:42,910 --> 00:03:44,610 Oh, boy. 82 00:03:44,645 --> 00:03:47,046 Layla. Yeah, yeah, it's you, uh-huh. 83 00:03:47,081 --> 00:03:49,581 Oh, I didn't mean to interrupt. Just keep-keep at it. 84 00:03:49,617 --> 00:03:50,883 I'll be... 85 00:03:50,918 --> 00:03:54,453 Dumbass. Stupid tight jeans. 86 00:03:58,359 --> 00:04:01,660 Mm. What a freak. 87 00:04:01,696 --> 00:04:03,128 Oh, he's here! He's here! 88 00:04:03,164 --> 00:04:05,464 Alangulon, stop diddling yourself! Come say hi! 89 00:04:05,499 --> 00:04:07,232 Haveth me yumpnarfs! 90 00:04:07,268 --> 00:04:09,301 Aw, it's good to see you. 91 00:04:09,336 --> 00:04:11,770 - Oh, man. - Oh, is that Glombeast blood on your shirt there? 92 00:04:11,806 --> 00:04:13,439 Wh... Oh! 93 00:04:13,474 --> 00:04:15,441 - Got you! - Oh, man, you got me. 94 00:04:15,476 --> 00:04:16,809 But really, is that blood? 95 00:04:16,844 --> 00:04:18,077 - Never mind. - Who is that I see? 96 00:04:18,112 --> 00:04:20,045 - Is that Edie? - Hey, Butt. 97 00:04:20,081 --> 00:04:22,147 Boy, oh, boy, you look mature. 98 00:04:22,183 --> 00:04:23,549 - Oh. - Uh, in a, in a good way. 99 00:04:23,584 --> 00:04:25,117 You know, without the dread-mohawk 100 00:04:25,152 --> 00:04:27,252 - and all the face piercings. - Well, it's still 101 00:04:27,288 --> 00:04:29,488 my driver's license photo, so... 102 00:04:29,523 --> 00:04:30,989 Uh, this is Craig, my fiancé. 103 00:04:31,025 --> 00:04:33,625 Hi. As you can see, I sort of came prepared. 104 00:04:33,661 --> 00:04:35,794 - I want your butt right on my head. - Oh... 105 00:04:35,830 --> 00:04:37,296 That didn't sound right. I'm sorry. 106 00:04:37,331 --> 00:04:39,198 Aw, Butt, no, come on, you shouldn't have. 107 00:04:39,233 --> 00:04:42,134 You know, I didn't think they still sold comfort slaves at Duty Free. 108 00:04:42,169 --> 00:04:44,837 - Kneel, wench! - No, no, Zorn. 109 00:04:44,872 --> 00:04:47,840 - This is my girlfriend, Elizabeth. - Your girlfriend? 110 00:04:47,875 --> 00:04:50,509 - Head's told me so much about you. - "Head?" 111 00:04:50,544 --> 00:04:52,377 - You must be Edie. - Hi. 112 00:04:52,413 --> 00:04:55,647 - Do I... Have we met? - I don't think so. 113 00:04:55,683 --> 00:04:57,516 - Maybe in Zephyria? - Oh. 114 00:04:57,551 --> 00:04:59,451 Did you used to have a spider that lived in your face? 115 00:04:59,487 --> 00:05:02,121 - No, sorry. - Well, let me show you guys 116 00:05:02,156 --> 00:05:03,021 where you're gonna be. Oh, my God! 117 00:05:03,057 --> 00:05:04,022 What? 118 00:05:04,058 --> 00:05:06,391 Headbutt Girl, come on! You don't just 119 00:05:06,427 --> 00:05:09,194 enter someone's house and stand there all creepily. 120 00:05:09,230 --> 00:05:10,562 Oh, sorry. Hi. 121 00:05:10,598 --> 00:05:13,365 Um... my mom and brother are both dead. 122 00:05:13,400 --> 00:05:15,166 - It's... - Hey, there he is! 123 00:05:15,201 --> 00:05:17,336 - Yo. - The fruit of my loins. 124 00:05:17,371 --> 00:05:20,105 He's got his mother's eyes, but his father's penises. 125 00:05:20,141 --> 00:05:21,874 What? Okay. 126 00:05:21,909 --> 00:05:23,909 All right, on that note, I'm probably gonna head out. 127 00:05:23,944 --> 00:05:25,377 - Where? - Oh, to that party. 128 00:05:25,412 --> 00:05:26,945 Uh, you said you'd let me borrow the car, remember? 129 00:05:26,981 --> 00:05:28,147 A party? Oh, wow! 130 00:05:28,182 --> 00:05:29,481 That sounds like something Headbutt Girl would be 131 00:05:29,517 --> 00:05:31,183 totally interested in. Hey, you know what, 132 00:05:31,218 --> 00:05:32,851 maybe you guys could go together or something like that. 133 00:05:32,887 --> 00:05:34,353 I don't know, I'm just throwing the idea out there. 134 00:05:34,388 --> 00:05:36,121 Oh, you know what, actually, really, it's more of a... 135 00:05:36,157 --> 00:05:40,225 Yes, that is a great idea. You should bring her along. 136 00:05:41,295 --> 00:05:43,428 She is our guest. 137 00:05:43,464 --> 00:05:46,365 - Okay. Shall we? - All right. 138 00:05:46,400 --> 00:05:49,201 Okay, so, uh, Headbutt Girl, where would... 139 00:05:49,236 --> 00:05:50,769 Headbutt Girl? 140 00:05:50,805 --> 00:05:53,472 What are you, my dad? Okay, no one calls me that. 141 00:05:53,541 --> 00:05:55,073 Call me Dorothy Clementina. 142 00:05:55,109 --> 00:05:58,076 - Okay, uh, Dorothy, the... - Oh, I'm sorry, did I just say Dorothy, 143 00:05:58,112 --> 00:06:00,412 or did I say Dorothy Clementina?! 144 00:06:00,447 --> 00:06:02,781 Use both names together so it sounds more badass. 145 00:06:02,817 --> 00:06:06,752 I'm sorry. Uh, okay. So... I just want to make sure 146 00:06:06,787 --> 00:06:09,121 you're prepared to go to, like, an American party. 147 00:06:09,190 --> 00:06:12,191 Is there gonna be sex at the party? 'Cause I'm good at sex. 148 00:06:12,226 --> 00:06:13,626 You know what? I think there's probably 149 00:06:13,627 --> 00:06:15,027 some better stuff we could do tonight. 150 00:06:15,062 --> 00:06:16,829 This party is pretty stupid. 151 00:06:16,864 --> 00:06:20,365 We're going to that party! Start the car! 152 00:06:20,401 --> 00:06:22,901 - What do you think about an accent wall? - Oh, I like that. 153 00:06:22,937 --> 00:06:24,570 - Do you? - Hey, don't worry. 154 00:06:24,605 --> 00:06:26,271 Five minutes of small talk and we can split. 155 00:06:26,307 --> 00:06:28,173 My office is having a bananas-ass throw-down. 156 00:06:28,209 --> 00:06:29,408 And then after the party, 157 00:06:29,443 --> 00:06:31,944 I know this guy who has an illegal bull on his ranch. 158 00:06:31,979 --> 00:06:33,979 I'd love to see what you can do against that thing. 159 00:06:34,014 --> 00:06:35,781 Yeah, sure, no, that's, uh... 160 00:06:35,816 --> 00:06:38,116 Why don't we just see how the night plays out? 161 00:06:38,152 --> 00:06:39,484 - Is that Nababbo? - Oh, my God. 162 00:06:39,520 --> 00:06:41,119 You're familiar with the Nina Simone of goat's milks? 163 00:06:41,155 --> 00:06:43,322 Well, is this, like, a cheese tasting, or... 164 00:06:43,357 --> 00:06:45,190 - Oh, well, it can be. - Yeah. 165 00:06:45,259 --> 00:06:47,359 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, you guys go ahead and stay here. 166 00:06:47,394 --> 00:06:50,229 Sniff dairy, stack crackers, be generally very boring. 167 00:06:50,264 --> 00:06:53,332 Really? I don't know, I... cheese night sounds kind of fun. 168 00:06:53,367 --> 00:06:54,766 - Fun? - You know what, 169 00:06:54,802 --> 00:06:56,435 we could have a cheese/wine pairing. 170 00:06:56,470 --> 00:06:59,805 - Ooh! - Uh, actually, uh, no wine for me. 171 00:06:59,840 --> 00:07:01,506 Oh, wait a minute, now I get it. 172 00:07:01,542 --> 00:07:02,975 "Cheese night." "No wine for me." 173 00:07:03,010 --> 00:07:05,277 Aw, I totally fell for it, man. 174 00:07:05,312 --> 00:07:06,612 That's hilarious. 175 00:07:06,647 --> 00:07:09,648 Actually, Zorn, I, um... I don't party anymore. 176 00:07:09,683 --> 00:07:13,518 - I-I quit. - Well, that is great news. 177 00:07:13,554 --> 00:07:14,553 - Congratulations. - Yeah. 178 00:07:14,588 --> 00:07:16,188 Hold on! 179 00:07:16,223 --> 00:07:18,090 Look at those crackers! 180 00:07:18,125 --> 00:07:19,692 - Thank you. - Wow! 181 00:07:19,727 --> 00:07:21,460 You know how to make a guy's mouth water. 182 00:07:21,495 --> 00:07:23,262 Am I right or am I right or am I right? 183 00:07:25,332 --> 00:07:27,791 You must have crackers from all over the world! 184 00:07:31,176 --> 00:07:34,010 Well, how did you two meet? 185 00:07:34,045 --> 00:07:37,380 Oh, well, I was working as a nurse in Zephyria 186 00:07:37,415 --> 00:07:39,015 - Mhm. - through Doctors Without Borders. 187 00:07:39,050 --> 00:07:40,450 And they just opened up that coffee spot 188 00:07:40,485 --> 00:07:42,233 down the street from Butt Palace. 189 00:07:42,268 --> 00:07:44,253 So I was on a little latte break, and... 190 00:07:44,289 --> 00:07:46,055 - they mixed up our orders. - And they mixed up our orders! 191 00:07:46,091 --> 00:07:47,657 - Are you kidding me? - Oh, wait a sec. 192 00:07:47,692 --> 00:07:49,092 You were a nurse? That must be it. 193 00:07:49,127 --> 00:07:52,395 Were you working triage during the bloodbath of '92? 194 00:07:52,430 --> 00:07:54,997 No. I was zombified and buried underground for all of '92. 195 00:07:55,033 --> 00:07:56,532 - Oh. - Anyway, 196 00:07:56,568 --> 00:07:58,367 turns out Head and I have so much in common. 197 00:07:58,403 --> 00:08:00,670 - Ugh. - We both really like visiting canals. 198 00:08:00,705 --> 00:08:02,739 Well, Elizabeth got me into it. 199 00:08:02,774 --> 00:08:03,806 That's what we're doing in town, actually. 200 00:08:03,842 --> 00:08:04,941 We're gonna visit the Venice Canals. 201 00:08:04,976 --> 00:08:06,976 - Oh, boy. - Oh, we've seen 202 00:08:07,011 --> 00:08:10,646 all the greats: Dane's Canal, Old Sussex Canal, Carnhar's Canal. 203 00:08:10,682 --> 00:08:12,515 Yeah, yeah. Sure, sure. Names of canals, 204 00:08:12,550 --> 00:08:13,850 other canal names, right, okay. 205 00:08:13,885 --> 00:08:15,318 Hey, Butt, remember when you got wasted 206 00:08:15,353 --> 00:08:18,238 and head-slammed that wild boar? 207 00:08:18,256 --> 00:08:19,989 Do I? Then I followed that boar home 208 00:08:20,024 --> 00:08:21,824 - and murdered its whole family. - Oh, that's right. 209 00:08:23,394 --> 00:08:25,628 But we should probably... 210 00:08:25,663 --> 00:08:28,431 not dwell on the past, you know? 211 00:08:28,466 --> 00:08:31,367 - I couldn't agree more. - Well, let's have a toast. 212 00:08:31,402 --> 00:08:32,802 - To new friends and old. - Yes. 213 00:08:36,141 --> 00:08:38,174 - I'm out of here! - My crackers! 214 00:08:38,209 --> 00:08:41,544 Sorry about the crackers! Please clean them up for me. 215 00:08:41,579 --> 00:08:42,945 Come on, Star Sprinkle, get in here. 216 00:08:42,981 --> 00:08:44,347 There you go. 217 00:08:44,382 --> 00:08:46,149 Oh, it's gonna be the best butt ever. 218 00:08:46,184 --> 00:08:49,085 Headbutting a unicorn? It just makes sense, right? 219 00:08:49,120 --> 00:08:50,887 - Let me at it! - Butt! Butt! Butt! 220 00:08:50,922 --> 00:08:53,489 That unicorn's toast! 221 00:08:53,525 --> 00:08:55,525 Hey. Oh, wow, glorp. 222 00:08:55,560 --> 00:08:57,960 I didn't know you were still glorping. 223 00:08:57,996 --> 00:09:00,763 Yeah, yeah. Hey, remember how we used to cut it 224 00:09:00,799 --> 00:09:02,431 with the ground-up teeth of those we vanquished? 225 00:09:02,467 --> 00:09:03,800 I sure do. 226 00:09:03,835 --> 00:09:05,468 Yeah, I brought some for old time's sake, 227 00:09:05,503 --> 00:09:07,470 but I'm guessing you don't want any? 228 00:09:07,505 --> 00:09:10,339 Yeah. Elizabeth doesn't really approve. 229 00:09:10,375 --> 00:09:12,341 You know, mouth cancer and all. 230 00:09:12,377 --> 00:09:15,111 Butt, are you kidding me? Mouth cancer's not a thing. 231 00:09:15,146 --> 00:09:16,813 That chick is brainwashing you. 232 00:09:16,848 --> 00:09:18,848 Come on, we're having fun together. 233 00:09:18,883 --> 00:09:21,818 - You met at a coffee shop. - Yeah, Zorn. 234 00:09:21,853 --> 00:09:25,421 She met me in a coffee shop bathroom, 235 00:09:25,456 --> 00:09:27,990 wasted off my ass, covered in my own vomit. 236 00:09:28,026 --> 00:09:31,894 She took me in, cleaned me up, got me into the program. 237 00:09:31,930 --> 00:09:34,597 If it weren't for her, I just... I don't know. 238 00:09:34,632 --> 00:09:37,433 I'm just saying, she saved me, man. 239 00:09:37,468 --> 00:09:40,503 - I had to grow up sooner or later. - No, I get it, I get it. 240 00:09:40,538 --> 00:09:42,705 It's just, life here is so boring. 241 00:09:42,740 --> 00:09:45,474 I was so psyched for one night of fun with my best friend. 242 00:09:45,510 --> 00:09:49,045 Okay? Two pals reliving the glory days, that's all. 243 00:09:51,382 --> 00:09:54,951 Tell you what. Let's swing by that work party. 244 00:09:54,986 --> 00:09:57,453 You can buy me a club soda. 245 00:10:00,725 --> 00:10:03,392 What's up? What's up? 246 00:10:03,428 --> 00:10:04,894 How you livin'? 247 00:10:04,929 --> 00:10:06,562 Hey, what's up? Son of Zorn. 248 00:10:06,598 --> 00:10:09,799 - Hey. - Uh... Ooh, uh... 249 00:10:09,834 --> 00:10:12,702 - Who's this? - Uh, this is, uh, Head... 250 00:10:12,737 --> 00:10:14,036 This... her name is Dorothy Clementina. 251 00:10:14,072 --> 00:10:15,404 What's up, man? 252 00:10:15,440 --> 00:10:17,039 - I have teenage gout. - Mm-hmm. 253 00:10:17,075 --> 00:10:18,741 Oh. 254 00:10:18,776 --> 00:10:20,509 She's a, she's a family friend, know what I'm saying? 255 00:10:20,545 --> 00:10:23,346 - Alan. - Oh, hey. 256 00:10:23,381 --> 00:10:25,882 Uh, I'm gonna go say hi to someone. So... 257 00:10:25,917 --> 00:10:29,185 - Dorothy Clementina, I'll... - Finally. 258 00:10:29,220 --> 00:10:32,221 - So, Clementina, huh? That's a... - Where can I drop a B.M.? 259 00:10:32,257 --> 00:10:34,724 Uh... I mean, there's a bathroom 260 00:10:34,759 --> 00:10:36,525 - over there, I think. - Bathroom? 261 00:10:36,561 --> 00:10:39,228 No, no. Someplace cooler. 262 00:10:39,264 --> 00:10:40,696 Um... 263 00:10:40,732 --> 00:10:43,933 Listen up, San-Soluties. 264 00:10:43,968 --> 00:10:46,369 This is Butt, my best friend in the world. 265 00:10:46,404 --> 00:10:48,070 And if he does something you enjoy, 266 00:10:48,106 --> 00:10:51,807 the chant goes like this: "Butt! Butt! Butt! Butt!" 267 00:10:51,843 --> 00:10:53,374 And so on, to infinity. 268 00:10:53,375 --> 00:10:55,605 ♪ Changing by the minute and the record on repeat ♪ 269 00:10:55,640 --> 00:10:57,573 ♪ Took a sip, then another sip ♪ 270 00:10:57,609 --> 00:10:59,675 ♪ Then somebody said to me ♪ 271 00:10:59,711 --> 00:11:02,879 ♪ Why you babysitting only two or three shots? ♪ 272 00:11:02,914 --> 00:11:05,314 ♪ I'm-a show you how to turn it up a notch ♪ 273 00:11:05,350 --> 00:11:06,983 ♪ First you get a swimming pool ♪ 274 00:11:07,018 --> 00:11:09,519 ♪ Full of liquor, then you dive in it ♪ 275 00:11:09,554 --> 00:11:10,620 ♪ Pool full of liquor ♪ 276 00:11:10,655 --> 00:11:12,722 ♪ Then you dive in it. ♪ 277 00:11:12,897 --> 00:11:14,063 - Buddy, you okay? - Yeah. 278 00:11:14,098 --> 00:11:16,465 I'm good, I'm good. Two beers, please. 279 00:11:16,501 --> 00:11:17,500 Whoa, whoa. Two beers? 280 00:11:17,535 --> 00:11:20,036 - Are you sure about this, pal? - Ah, it's okay, Zorn. 281 00:11:20,071 --> 00:11:21,270 A couple sips won't hurt me. 282 00:11:21,306 --> 00:11:22,405 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. 283 00:11:22,440 --> 00:11:23,940 Hey, before you take that drink, 284 00:11:23,975 --> 00:11:25,675 I just want you to think about... 285 00:11:25,710 --> 00:11:29,512 how awesome this is gonna be! Butt! Butt! Butt! 286 00:11:29,547 --> 00:11:32,048 Butt! Butt! Butt! Butt! Butt! 287 00:11:32,083 --> 00:11:34,617 Ooh, five of clubs. 288 00:11:34,652 --> 00:11:36,919 Gin, ladies. Take off your tops. 289 00:11:36,955 --> 00:11:41,457 - I'm kidding. - I'm sorry. 290 00:11:41,492 --> 00:11:43,459 - You just look so familiar. - All right, look. 291 00:11:43,494 --> 00:11:47,029 It's true, we have met before. Does Arrowhead ring a bell? 292 00:11:47,065 --> 00:11:48,898 - Arrowhead. - Okay, let me guess. 293 00:11:48,933 --> 00:11:51,734 Arrowhead is a guy whose head is shaped like an arrow, 294 00:11:51,769 --> 00:11:53,836 and when he opens his mouth, arrows come out 295 00:11:53,871 --> 00:11:56,138 and they shoot you, and then you turn into an arrow, 296 00:11:56,174 --> 00:11:58,207 and then you shoot other people in the head. 297 00:11:58,242 --> 00:11:59,308 No. That's Archeron. 298 00:11:59,344 --> 00:12:03,946 Arrowhead was our seventh grade summer camp. 299 00:12:03,982 --> 00:12:07,149 You're Lizzy Jones! Oh! 300 00:12:07,185 --> 00:12:08,617 Why didn't you just say so? 301 00:12:08,653 --> 00:12:12,421 Well, I had a boyfriend at the time, and you kissed him. 302 00:12:12,457 --> 00:12:14,991 - Ooh! - What? 303 00:12:15,026 --> 00:12:17,860 - Yeah. Josh Kirschenbaum? - Oh, I remember Josh. 304 00:12:17,895 --> 00:12:21,297 But Josh was going out with me at the time, so... 305 00:12:21,332 --> 00:12:22,832 - Oh! - I mean, that's not 306 00:12:22,867 --> 00:12:24,433 how it happened, but that's okay, I don't care. 307 00:12:24,469 --> 00:12:26,635 Well, that is definitely how it happened, 308 00:12:26,671 --> 00:12:28,471 but I don't care either. 309 00:12:28,506 --> 00:12:33,209 Well, my opinion? I do care, and I want answers. 310 00:12:33,244 --> 00:12:35,244 So then I was like, "H-2-O? 311 00:12:35,279 --> 00:12:39,048 - More like H-2-hell no." - Good joke. 312 00:12:39,083 --> 00:12:41,101 - That is bad. - Awesome. 313 00:12:41,136 --> 00:12:43,219 - No. Bad. - You nailed it. 314 00:12:43,254 --> 00:12:47,590 You know, actually, I'm really happy I came to this party. 315 00:12:47,625 --> 00:12:50,192 Even though I normally hate parties. 316 00:12:50,228 --> 00:12:52,061 Well, I'm-I'm glad you came, too. 317 00:12:52,096 --> 00:12:53,963 And I did, as well. 318 00:12:53,998 --> 00:12:58,067 - So... yeah. - Yeah, me also. 319 00:12:59,103 --> 00:13:00,503 Where's your friend? 320 00:13:00,538 --> 00:13:02,772 Because I want him for sex, you know? He kind of ran away. 321 00:13:02,807 --> 00:13:04,673 He, uh, y... I don't know, sorry. 322 00:13:04,709 --> 00:13:07,610 All right. I'll check the bathroom, I guess, 323 00:13:07,645 --> 00:13:09,345 'cause he seems obsessed with the location. 324 00:13:09,380 --> 00:13:11,847 - Good luck. - All right. 325 00:13:11,883 --> 00:13:14,450 Okay, so that's... she's, like, a... like, a family friend. 326 00:13:14,485 --> 00:13:17,019 Layla, Alan. Come on, we're going swimming. 327 00:13:17,055 --> 00:13:19,355 No, no suit here. So, uh-uh. 328 00:13:19,390 --> 00:13:20,790 Just put one of your socks on it. 329 00:13:20,825 --> 00:13:23,092 That's what my dad does. 330 00:13:23,127 --> 00:13:26,295 - Mm. - Did you see Shannon's outie? 331 00:13:26,330 --> 00:13:28,497 It looks like a baby finger. 332 00:13:28,533 --> 00:13:30,533 Well, that's... Things that are weird about people, 333 00:13:30,568 --> 00:13:32,301 what's that all about? 334 00:13:32,336 --> 00:13:35,838 - You coming? - I just ate. So, ugh. 335 00:13:35,873 --> 00:13:39,241 Oh, no. You could still probably swim, though. 336 00:13:39,277 --> 00:13:40,743 I'll ge... I'll get a cramp. 337 00:13:40,778 --> 00:13:42,578 The next thing you know, be a lawsuit. 338 00:13:42,613 --> 00:13:44,380 I don't want to be involved. 339 00:13:44,415 --> 00:13:46,215 Okay. 340 00:13:48,986 --> 00:13:52,888 All of my closest friends have died in pools. 341 00:13:56,216 --> 00:13:58,750 ♪ Munga, munga, munga, munga ♪ 342 00:13:58,785 --> 00:14:01,352 ♪ Munga, munga, munga, munga, munga, munga, yump! ♪ 343 00:14:05,759 --> 00:14:07,659 - Oh, man. - Hey, that was good. 344 00:14:07,694 --> 00:14:09,260 Thanks for getting me out, Zorn. 345 00:14:09,295 --> 00:14:13,231 Best time I've had in three months, two weeks and five days. 346 00:14:13,266 --> 00:14:15,299 I know, so let's keep the party going. 347 00:14:15,335 --> 00:14:17,335 You know, blow off those stupid canals tomorrow. 348 00:14:17,404 --> 00:14:20,304 Canals? What the...? Oh, right. 349 00:14:20,373 --> 00:14:22,507 No, right, yeah. I said I was gonna go to the Venice Canals. 350 00:14:22,542 --> 00:14:24,108 - Wait, are you not? - Uh, never mind. 351 00:14:24,144 --> 00:14:25,576 You know, it's-it's a whole thing. 352 00:14:25,612 --> 00:14:27,945 - I don't even want to... - Dude, you're my best friend. 353 00:14:27,981 --> 00:14:31,182 - You can tell me anything. - All right. Look. 354 00:14:31,217 --> 00:14:33,284 The real reason we came was 'cause Elizabeth 355 00:14:33,319 --> 00:14:36,154 wants me to see a neurologist at UCLA. 356 00:14:36,189 --> 00:14:38,189 - Wait. What? - Klorpins, the cave doctor, 357 00:14:38,224 --> 00:14:41,492 said I've got brain damage from a lifetime of ramming stuff. 358 00:14:41,528 --> 00:14:45,196 He said if I headbutt one more thing, I could die. 359 00:14:45,231 --> 00:14:46,798 Hey! 360 00:14:46,833 --> 00:14:48,700 - I got fireball shots. - Hell yeah! 361 00:14:48,735 --> 00:14:50,735 I'm feeling crazy tonight! 362 00:14:50,770 --> 00:14:54,739 - I like this one. - I'm gonna live forever! 363 00:14:54,774 --> 00:14:57,041 Okay, remember, your name 364 00:14:57,077 --> 00:14:59,844 is Michael Slater, and you were best friends with Josh at camp. 365 00:14:59,879 --> 00:15:01,345 Hello? 366 00:15:01,381 --> 00:15:03,815 Josh? Josh Kirschenbaum? 367 00:15:03,850 --> 00:15:05,383 Yeah. Uh, who's this? 368 00:15:05,418 --> 00:15:10,254 Michael Slater from Camp Arrowhead. 369 00:15:10,290 --> 00:15:12,824 I found your number online, so, uh... 370 00:15:12,859 --> 00:15:14,092 It's been a long time, huh? 371 00:15:14,127 --> 00:15:17,595 Yeah, a long while. What do you want? 372 00:15:17,630 --> 00:15:20,164 Yeah, so, listen, I'm writing a memoir about my childhood. 373 00:15:20,200 --> 00:15:23,968 It's called A Life of Wonder: Michael's Tale. 374 00:15:24,003 --> 00:15:25,837 And, um, it's being published by Knopf. 375 00:15:25,872 --> 00:15:28,005 I don't know if you heard of them... and Random House 376 00:15:28,041 --> 00:15:29,674 was looking around. They were sort of sniffing 377 00:15:29,709 --> 00:15:32,076 and trying to make... Anyways, I was wondering, 378 00:15:32,112 --> 00:15:35,279 maybe you can clear up some stories from my camp days? 379 00:15:35,315 --> 00:15:38,850 Did you have a girlfriend named Edie or Lizzy? 380 00:15:38,885 --> 00:15:41,886 Come on, Mike, I had, like, 11 girlfriends. 381 00:15:41,921 --> 00:15:45,156 Yeah, I know, but, uh, who did you like more, 382 00:15:45,191 --> 00:15:47,191 Edie or Lizzie? 383 00:15:47,227 --> 00:15:48,726 Well, okay, let's see. 384 00:15:48,762 --> 00:15:51,796 Obviously, Lizzy was Lizzy the Ho, so she was fun, 385 00:15:51,831 --> 00:15:52,797 but also kind of gross. 386 00:15:52,832 --> 00:15:55,967 And Edie... she was hot but totally flat. 387 00:15:56,002 --> 00:15:57,568 - Oh, my God! - Hey! 388 00:15:57,604 --> 00:15:59,203 - Who was that? - You know what? 389 00:15:59,239 --> 00:16:01,672 It's Edie Bennett and Lizzy the Ho, you fart-sack! 390 00:16:01,708 --> 00:16:03,074 Hey, Mike, what the hell is this? 391 00:16:03,109 --> 00:16:04,308 - Look, you need help at all... - Just hang up. 392 00:16:04,344 --> 00:16:08,246 - Just hang up. - Such a jerk, that guy! 393 00:16:08,281 --> 00:16:10,481 - Well, it's settled. - Wait, something's wrong. 394 00:16:10,517 --> 00:16:11,817 I mean, this looks like Head 395 00:16:11,818 --> 00:16:14,652 when he texts with his head and not his thumbs. 396 00:16:14,687 --> 00:16:17,155 I'm telling ya, all it took was one headbutt, 397 00:16:17,190 --> 00:16:20,516 and that little girl went flying! 398 00:16:21,094 --> 00:16:23,394 Am I the only one that finds this story disturbing? 399 00:16:23,429 --> 00:16:26,097 - Yes. - Hey, Butt Man, 400 00:16:26,132 --> 00:16:28,299 why don't you put your head where your mouth is? 401 00:16:28,334 --> 00:16:32,203 You, uh, think you can smash that chair with your head? 402 00:16:32,238 --> 00:16:34,505 Does a Grithian herdsman have nine anuses? 403 00:16:34,541 --> 00:16:36,174 I don't know. 404 00:16:36,209 --> 00:16:37,642 Hey, uh, you know what'd be really fun? 405 00:16:37,677 --> 00:16:39,510 Driving home and seeing if there's any cheese left, 406 00:16:39,546 --> 00:16:42,246 - then going to bed. - Stop being such a buzz-kill, Zorn. 407 00:16:42,282 --> 00:16:44,649 I love this guy. 408 00:16:44,684 --> 00:16:46,584 It's too dangerous! 409 00:16:46,619 --> 00:16:47,819 - You suck! - They say if you see something, 410 00:16:47,854 --> 00:16:49,420 you're supposed to say something. Well, I... 411 00:16:49,455 --> 00:16:52,523 - Hey, you. - Zorn, where are you guys? 412 00:16:52,559 --> 00:16:55,226 - Elizabeth is freaking out. - Uh, still at the party. 413 00:16:55,261 --> 00:16:57,061 Just, you know, sipping our Shirley Temples. 414 00:16:57,096 --> 00:16:58,830 I'll do it. You think I won't? 415 00:16:58,865 --> 00:17:00,331 Oh, is that Butt? 416 00:17:00,366 --> 00:17:02,533 You really think you can headbutt my truck? 417 00:17:02,569 --> 00:17:04,302 - It's a V-8! - No, no, no, no. 418 00:17:04,337 --> 00:17:05,870 - Butt! Linda! Butt! - Let's take this party to the next level! 419 00:17:05,905 --> 00:17:07,505 Edie, just tell Elizabeth... 420 00:17:07,540 --> 00:17:09,941 Tell Elizabeth what? She's terrified. 421 00:17:09,976 --> 00:17:11,576 How did I even get... 422 00:17:11,611 --> 00:17:13,911 Phew. That was a close one. 423 00:17:13,947 --> 00:17:15,379 Hey, where'd everyone go? 424 00:17:15,415 --> 00:17:19,183 Uh, I think I heard somebody say something 425 00:17:19,219 --> 00:17:20,585 about headbutting a truck? 426 00:17:20,620 --> 00:17:24,188 Who's gonna headbutt the truck... I-I have no idea. 427 00:17:27,615 --> 00:17:31,570 Oh, my God, you're so disgusting. 428 00:17:31,752 --> 00:17:33,219 - Are you eating my deodorant? - Yeah. 429 00:17:33,254 --> 00:17:35,121 I want my mouth to smell like your armpits. 430 00:17:35,156 --> 00:17:37,723 - What's the big deal? - What is she even doing here? 431 00:17:37,758 --> 00:17:39,358 - Who invited her? - He did. 432 00:17:39,393 --> 00:17:42,495 What? Me? No, I didn't... not really. 433 00:17:42,530 --> 00:17:45,297 She's just, like, my dad's friend's, uh... 434 00:17:45,333 --> 00:17:48,601 This is a party, Alan, not a zoo for freaks. 435 00:17:48,636 --> 00:17:51,471 All right. Well, that one was harsh. 436 00:17:51,472 --> 00:17:54,607 That one I can't forget. TF... too far. 437 00:17:54,642 --> 00:17:57,243 I think we're all saying stuff we're gonna regret. 438 00:17:57,278 --> 00:18:00,646 - Hey, Shannon, she's not a freak. - Look at her. 439 00:18:00,681 --> 00:18:02,681 - She has a mustache. - Okay. 440 00:18:02,717 --> 00:18:04,183 Yeah, yeah, she's got a mustache. 441 00:18:04,218 --> 00:18:06,185 - All right, well... - She also has teenage gout. 442 00:18:06,220 --> 00:18:09,922 She also says she has to go to the bathroom all the time, and... 443 00:18:09,957 --> 00:18:12,191 Also, my nipples are the opposite of small. 444 00:18:12,226 --> 00:18:13,459 Just let me get through this, okay? 445 00:18:13,494 --> 00:18:14,960 Oh, yeah, yeah. It's all you. It's all you. 446 00:18:14,996 --> 00:18:16,328 It's all you. 447 00:18:16,364 --> 00:18:18,164 Everyone has something weird about them. 448 00:18:18,199 --> 00:18:20,533 But she knows who she is and she doesn't care. 449 00:18:20,568 --> 00:18:24,170 She owns it. And that's... I think that's pretty cool. 450 00:18:24,205 --> 00:18:25,538 It's a lot cooler than I am. 451 00:18:25,873 --> 00:18:27,739 Whatever. 452 00:18:27,775 --> 00:18:29,541 I'm gonna go have sex in my little sister's room. 453 00:18:29,577 --> 00:18:31,944 - Me, too. - All right, let's go. 454 00:18:32,012 --> 00:18:35,414 Hey. Thanks, Alangulon. 455 00:18:35,449 --> 00:18:38,549 You know what? Thank you, Headbutt Girl. 456 00:18:40,571 --> 00:18:43,405 - What the hell?! - I told you, only my dad calls me that. 457 00:18:43,440 --> 00:18:48,076 What the hell are you looking at?! You want to go?! 458 00:18:48,112 --> 00:18:49,344 That's what I thought. 459 00:18:49,380 --> 00:18:51,179 I'm gonna go find a rug to scoot on. 460 00:18:51,215 --> 00:18:52,447 Oh, my God. 461 00:18:52,483 --> 00:18:56,184 - Are you okay? - Uh, yeah, I'm fine. Just, like... 462 00:18:56,220 --> 00:18:57,586 You know, I could have a concussion, 463 00:18:57,621 --> 00:19:00,222 so you probably have to stay with me all night, you know? 464 00:19:00,257 --> 00:19:02,190 Oh, I have to stay with you all night? 465 00:19:02,226 --> 00:19:03,859 Well, just in case. If I have a concussion, 466 00:19:03,894 --> 00:19:05,827 I'm not liable for anything I say, just so you know. 467 00:19:05,863 --> 00:19:07,129 Yeah, okay. 468 00:19:07,164 --> 00:19:09,498 No, I'm telling you, Butt, do not do this! 469 00:19:09,533 --> 00:19:12,634 - You're gonna die! - I'm fine, Zorny. 470 00:19:12,670 --> 00:19:14,536 This is what I was born to do. 471 00:19:14,571 --> 00:19:17,539 - Out of the way, Zorn! - Linda, will you please? 472 00:19:17,574 --> 00:19:19,041 Linda, stop. You don't understand. 473 00:19:19,076 --> 00:19:21,043 Hey, Butt Man brought this on himself. 474 00:19:21,078 --> 00:19:22,411 You don't mess with the devil. 475 00:19:22,446 --> 00:19:25,847 I need to talk to Boss Linda now. 476 00:19:25,883 --> 00:19:28,250 Okay. Boss Linda here. You're fired, Zorn! 477 00:19:28,285 --> 00:19:30,218 - Linda, please. - Now Slayer Linda's back. 478 00:19:30,254 --> 00:19:31,653 - Linda... - You're not fired, Zorn. 479 00:19:31,689 --> 00:19:33,422 - Stop! - And your friend is gonna die! 480 00:19:33,457 --> 00:19:36,391 Linda, you shouldn't even be driving right now. 481 00:19:38,896 --> 00:19:39,795 Stop! 482 00:19:39,830 --> 00:19:42,898 Stop, stop! Stop! 483 00:19:44,301 --> 00:19:46,702 Stop! 484 00:19:46,737 --> 00:19:48,336 Elizabeth? 485 00:19:48,372 --> 00:19:51,039 Oh, God, what have I done? 486 00:19:51,075 --> 00:19:53,542 - Shh, shh, shh. - Look at me! 487 00:19:53,577 --> 00:19:55,744 It's okay. It's okay. I'm here now. 488 00:19:55,779 --> 00:19:57,846 Shh, shh, shh. 489 00:19:57,881 --> 00:20:00,549 Augusta Canal. Oswego Canal. 490 00:20:00,584 --> 00:20:02,684 Saint Clair Harbor. Flats Canal. 491 00:20:02,720 --> 00:20:03,919 Yeah! 492 00:20:03,954 --> 00:20:05,620 Butt! Butt! Butt! 493 00:20:05,656 --> 00:20:08,890 Oh, man, he did it! He actually headbutted a unicorn! 494 00:20:08,926 --> 00:20:11,526 Dude, you look awesome right now. 495 00:20:11,562 --> 00:20:13,428 I don't like myself, Zorn. 496 00:20:13,497 --> 00:20:16,364 I can't live like this. I need help! 497 00:20:16,400 --> 00:20:18,834 So that's what happened to my eye. 498 00:20:18,869 --> 00:20:21,303 - I always wondered. - Yeah, I guess I never watched 499 00:20:21,338 --> 00:20:22,938 this video all the way to the end. 500 00:20:22,973 --> 00:20:25,240 I can't believe I almost died for one last headbutt. 501 00:20:25,275 --> 00:20:27,242 Well, I guess there's an argument to be made 502 00:20:27,277 --> 00:20:29,578 that it's better to have you around boring and alive 503 00:20:29,613 --> 00:20:31,813 than awesome and dead, you know? 504 00:20:31,849 --> 00:20:34,149 Hey, hey. Just want to say a quick good-bye to everybody. 505 00:20:34,184 --> 00:20:37,719 Ooh, your head still looks terrible. 506 00:20:37,755 --> 00:20:39,387 Yeah. It's on me, though, you know? 507 00:20:39,423 --> 00:20:40,956 I shouldn't have got in the way of the faucet 508 00:20:40,991 --> 00:20:41,923 like I did. Just... Whoo! 509 00:20:41,959 --> 00:20:44,559 Well, maybe that happened because you pissed off the faucet. 510 00:20:44,595 --> 00:20:47,463 If you could read between the lines, you would know that the faucet 511 00:20:47,464 --> 00:20:50,332 was hoping you were the one she could give her special flower to, 512 00:20:50,367 --> 00:20:52,968 but now the faucet will have to give it up 513 00:20:53,003 --> 00:20:55,036 to some stranger on a changing table in the airport bathroom! 514 00:20:55,072 --> 00:20:57,272 Okay, that's enough, Butty-cakes. 515 00:20:58,075 --> 00:21:02,177 - Oh, that's my daughter. - Well, guess you guys should hit the road, 516 00:21:02,212 --> 00:21:04,312 but not with your head. 517 00:21:04,348 --> 00:21:06,715 You get it? 'Cause you're brain-damaged. 518 00:21:06,750 --> 00:21:08,316 Dang it. Where'd I put my keys? 519 00:21:08,352 --> 00:21:10,452 Got 'em right here for you buddy. Here you go. 520 00:21:12,122 --> 00:21:14,256 Butt? 521 00:21:14,291 --> 00:21:16,925 Butt! 522 00:21:19,365 --> 00:21:23,107 sync & correction by f1nc0 ~ Addic7ed.com ~ 523 00:21:25,936 --> 00:21:28,336 ♪ She's all that I want ♪ 524 00:21:28,372 --> 00:21:30,772 ♪ All-all that I want ♪ 525 00:21:30,808 --> 00:21:32,307 ♪ And I, and I ♪ 526 00:21:32,342 --> 00:21:35,577 ♪ And I want to feel the heat ♪ 527 00:21:35,646 --> 00:21:37,946 ♪ She shifted up the clutch ♪ 528 00:21:37,981 --> 00:21:40,282 ♪ Jump-Jumping double Dutch ♪ 529 00:21:40,317 --> 00:21:41,917 ♪ And I want, I want ♪ 530 00:21:41,952 --> 00:21:45,453 ♪ I want her to jump for me ♪ 531 00:21:45,522 --> 00:21:46,988 ♪ Oh... ♪ 532 00:21:46,989 --> 00:21:48,888 Whoa!