Hey, want some flax for your yogurt?
It's rich in omega-3 fatty acids
and it promotes regularity.
Who are you?
Hey, I'm sorry Andi broke up with you
because you're the son of the Devil.
And even though your dad's evil,
I thought you guys were a great couple together.
No no, don't be sorry. I'm not ready to give up yet.
If I keep pushing, working some angles, using my charm,
I know I can get her back.
You think that's the right idea?
Maybe you should give her a little space for a while.
No, space is the enemy. I'm not done until we get back together.
Good for you.
Sometimes you gotta look reality in the face and say no.
Yeah.
Morning, buttheads.
Hey, you guys seen Kristen around?
I think she's in the shower.
Really?
I brought shower coffee.
Sock, what are you doing?
Come on, I've seen your cash and prizes before.
Get out. My father will catch us.
Relax. My mom and your dad moved out. We're good.
They could visit anytime. This is not acceptable.
What? Come on.
What are you so worried about?
My father cannot know I date my stepbrother.
All right, sure, he'll be shocked at first,
but so was the father of every girl I've ever dated.
But eventually, I promise you,
he will settle into a nice grudging acceptance.
No, you don't know my father.
He does not change his mind ever.
Go on. Don't let me interrupt.
Oh, come on.
Can you believe this?
She doesn't think that I can charm her father... me.
Unbelievable.
I know. It's nuts.
Can you put some clothes on, please?
I'm too upset for clothes, man.
Ooh, is that flax?
That's really good for you.
Why do you make it so hot?
Ugh, corporate's making me fill out
all these stupid responsibility matrix forms.
If I don't take a break I'm gonna kill someone.
Do you guys want to see a movie tonight?
The bloodier the better.
I choose Sam.
Hmm? What?
You guys broke up. I had to choose a side.
I chose Sam.
Wait, why do you have to choose any side?
Okay.
I know what you're trying to do here, Andi.
This is an ugly and awkward situation.
I made a choice. It's Sam. Live with it.
Nobody's saying that we don't want to be friends in the future.
We just think that for the time being
maybe we should take a break.
A friendship break while Sam heals.
Hmm.
That's too bad, 'cause I had a pretty cool assignment
I was gonna throw to a couple of friends.
A cool assignment?
Oh, we just got in a new shipment of hammocks,
really nice ones,
and I need people to stretch-test them.
Stretch-test?
Yeah, sleep in them for a few hours, see how they hold up.
- I choose you. I'm on your side. - The break's over.
Okay, when do we start? Are they here?
I thought so.
Try not to chew on it, okay?
Remember what happened to your squeaky toy?
None of my other girlfriends ever played fetch with me.
I like to be special.
Baby.
Hey, guess what Saturday is.
Our two-month anniversary.
You're right.
Wow, two months ago I kidnapped you
and forced you to be my boyfriend.
The details don't matter. What matters is
I want to do something special for our occasion...
anything you want to do, okay?
Unless it involved sacrificing an animal.
Oh.
But anything else... I'm in.
You know what? There is something that I want to do.
It's something that's really important to me.
And I think it will take our relationship to the next level.
Reverse cowgirl.
No, silly.
I want to take you flying.
Oh, right. Yeah, flying.
It's such an amazing experience, Ben.
At night I go up to the mountains
and I soar through the clouds
and I buzz along the treetops.
It's so moving, baby,
and I really want to share it with you.
Sounds awesome.
Really?
Let's go right now.
No, let's not.
Why?
I think we should save something so special
for our special day, that's all.
You're right. You're right.
Okay, we'll save it for Saturday.
Oh, it's gonna be so great.
Yeah.
Great.
I just don't understand.
This is like every relationship I've ever been in...
there's always a fatal flaw.
What's the fatal flaw this time?
Nina wants to take me flying,
but I can't. I don't want to die.
Have you tried telling her how you really feel?
Okay, shh.
Talking about feelings, Sam. Come on.
We're discussing Ben's fatal flaw, all right, not yours?
Now Benjamin, look at me. Come here, look at me.
I want you to forget all about this fatal flaw.
Poppycock. It's nonsense. You are going to fly.
- You think so? - I know so, buddy.
Bring it in hard. Go get her!
Oh, that's so sad. She's totally dumping him.
Great. What the hell is Morgan doing back?
Oh, he's here? I missed that guy
a little bit.
Afternoon, fellas.
What's shaking, Morgan?
Let me tell you where I was 12 hours ago...
the French Riviera,
surrounded by topless supermodels and champagne.
And now I'm here at the Work Bench
surrounded by toilet plungers.
You didn't have to come back.
Not true, Sammy boy. Dad ordered me to.
He wanted me to do more of that training stuff with you.
Just believe in yourself. There... training complete.
Sam, you know and I know
that I'm really bad at this job,
but you were born for it. You're great at this.
And I'm above it, no offense.
So I have a proposition for you...
you catch a soul for me
and I'll give you $10,000.
Morgan, no. I do not work for you.
Fair enough.
$20,000.
- Morgan, no. - Oh!
Hold on one sec.
We gotta catch the guy anyway, right?
Why don't we make a little extra cheese in the meantime?
- We don't need his money. - I need his money.
- I want his money, Sam. - For what?
For a new hot-water heater and jet skis.
It doesn't matter what for. Listen, don't we deserve
a little something for all the crap we put up with just once?
All right.
- All right. - All right!
So you catch me the soul, I'll take credit,
Dad's off my back and I'm out of your hair.
And you're all the richer for it.
Amen.
Can you smell it, Sammy?
Sweat and cigarettes?
Desperation.
Intoxicating.
Hey, my boy Morgan show his face yet?
Uh, yeah yeah. Everything's fine.
He's gonna help with the next soul.
That's what I wanted to hear.
I knew we just had to light a fire to that kid's rear end.
Speaking of next soul...
Oh, wait.
Actually, never mind.
I don't feel proud about this one, Sam.
One could say that I'm feeling a little guilty about it.
What does that mean?
Well, he was killed while coveting.
So?
So it's the commandment...
"Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's wife."
This poor schmuck was mentally undressing some broad,
and the next instant... bam, hit by a truck.
He was just looking at her, didn't have sex with her?
- No. - That is stupid.
Tell me about it. You know, in the old days
I used to get the souls that ate shrimp.
Can you imagine how unsatisfying that was?
Wait, so you can go to hell for just thinking of something?
Yeah. Don't blame me.
I didn't make the rules.
You know, you're right.
Why should I feel guilty about this?
This one's on the big guy.
Now get me my soul back.
The guy's name is Billy Boyland;
died back in the early '90s.
This was one of his favorite hangouts back then.
Excuse me, can I get...
It still is. Look over there.
...a little bit of whipped cream and two cherries?
Hi.
Hey, Billy.
Do I know you guys?
Huh-uh.
- Is that a dodgeball? - Good guess.
Well, yeah, I've had a lot of those thrown at me over the years.
It's also a vessel to send you back to hell.
Come on, I don't want to cause any trouble,
but you guys know why I went to hell, don't you?
Coveting... isn't that a little unfair?
I've read every excuse in the book, Billy boy.
It doesn't matter. Do it now. Nobody's looking.
No no, wait wait. Please just let me eat my dessert first.
Eternity is such a long time for no pie.
Okay, fine fine. Hurry up.
Thank you. Thank you.
It's delicious. You want some?
Sure. I wouldn't mind.
Oh. Don't be sorry.
Sorry. I got it.
It's not bad.
Vessel him now... the pie is ours.
Uh, where did he go?
- What? - Hmm?
There he is. There he is.
Son of a bun!
Billy, wait. Billy, wait.
He's got a weapon!
False alarm.
Sam, give me that vessel. I'll do this myself.
Please, is there any way you will let me stay out?
There is literally nothing you could say or do to stop this from happening.
I'm a virgin.
Say again?
I died before I ever had sex.
Just let me stay out long enough
so that I could fulfill that dream.
Sock, what are you doing?
He said the magic word, Sam.
The magic word is "virgin"?
- Ask anybody. - It's true.
So you dream to have sex?
You're looking at your dream weavers, my man.
We're gonna get you laid.
Eh?
We gotta get this guy some action.
It's gonna be tough but not impossible.
I got a plan. Follow me.
Yo, Billy, listen up, man.
If we're gonna make this happen for you,
you are gonna have to pay for sex. You cool with that, big guy?
What?
We're all gonna chip in for a really lovely and discreet lady.
High class. I like it. Now before we get started,
is there anything weird that you're into?
No no, I'm not paying for sex.
Billy, if you're not gonna cooperate, then we gotta send you back.
But I did have an idea.
What if we try the Encounters bar?
Why would you want to go there?
The clientele is a little more mature.
Mature? All right, I know what's going on here.
Yeah, our boy Billy's into the older ladies...
the cougs. That's smart. They get the job done fast, right?
The dirty 30s, the whorey 40s,
the surprisingly tender 50s.
You, my friend, are a genius.
We're gonna hit happy hour, pop your cherry.
Sock, is that what you're wearing?
Yes.
Today is family portrait day.
You must look presentable. Change.
Right right, pix with the fam. It's gonna be good.
I'll finally get a little quality time with Morris.
No, no quality time. Do not talk to my father.
Do not even look at him. Do you understand?
He's gonna love me.
Why don't the gentlemen step aside so I can get some shots of the ladies?
Absolutely. Beautiful ladies... I get it.
You guys look great.
Hey, man, I thought you hit some pretty rad poses back there.
We should hang sometime, me and you, you know what I mean?
So what do you like to do for fun?
You like to golf? I like to golf,
get out the old 9-iron, get a good short game.
What about ping-pong?
He likes fly-fishing.
Fly-fishing? That's aces.
I'm the biggest fly-fisher of all time. I love it.
He's going fly-fishing tomorrow. You should take him, Morris.
Fly-fishing is typically a solitary pursuit, so...
Oh, come on, honey.
Very well.
Tomorrow we fly-fish.
Mm, perfect. Okay, good.
I won't let you down.
Yeah, I'm gonna kick some fish ass.
Welcome to the jungle, boys.
Time for a little big-game hunting,
cougar-style.
Looks like regular ladies to me.
Lock and load, bitches. You tag 'em, you bag 'em.
Please stop talking like that.
That's her. That's her.
That's the one I want to talk to back there.
Okay, come on, I need a wingman.
- Not lt. - Not cool.
You guys know I stink at "not lt."
Come on, Billy.
Good afternoon, ladies.
What has this fine day brought for you?
We just got back from a conference.
A conference... wonderful. What do you do?
I'm a pharmaceutical rep.
Oh, and I'm a psychotherapist.
Oh, a psychotherapist.
So you deal with emotional issues,
people looking to overcome their fears
and forge meaningful and lasting relationships.
You could say that.
Fascinating. Would you like to get a drink with me?
Sure.
Hi. You look lovely.
Thank you.
And it just seems like whenever things start
to go well in a relationship,
something always comes up.
In this case it's the flying.
Maybe I'm unlucky or maybe
I just haven't found the right girl yet. I don't know.
My guess is the problem lies with you.
You sabotage your relationships.
I do that?
Perhaps because you don't believe you're worthy of love.
Oh, no.
Until you know for yourself,
you're not gonna be able to love others
or be loved.
You're right.
You're absolutely right.
Thank you. You're very good.
Is this still therapy?
It is for me.
We gotta go. Billy's on the move.
Really?
Yeah, believe it. Our little virgin's all grown up.
You don't mind? I just...
I'm sorry. I just...
I guess we just wait out the night.
When the sun comes up, we nab him before he does
the walk of shame. Good stuff.
What's going on?
Oh my God. We must have dozed off.
You don't think Billy escaped, huh?
Oh, okay.
Did you look both ways?
Billy!
Hey, guys, what's up?
Good God, we thought you might have skipped out on us.
No way. I don't want to be anywhere but right here.
Last night was amazing.
Well, I'm glad you got to do this, Billy,
but you know the deal.
Oh, no no no no.
I can't go back to hell now, I can't.
You guys, Cindy and l... we connected
on every level.
I think we're soulmates.
Whoa whoa whoa, a lot of guys confuse sex for love the first time.
You just met this woman at a random bar. Come on, Billy.
Actually, I knew she'd be there.
I was sort of following her.
She was the girl I was coveting when I died.
- Oh, okay. - Oh.
And when I got out of hell
I found out she's gotten divorced.
So I knew I had to take a shot.
And this time there is no "covet."
Now there's only "love it."
That's good.
Hey, Tiger. Your Pop Tarts are ready.
Hi.
Are these guys friends of yours?
Pretty much.
Yeah.
Well, I'm gonna be late for work,
so help yourself to anything in the kitchen.
- Okay. - I love you.
I love you too.
You can't send me back, Sam.
It's just not right.
Yeah.
Hey. Are you free for lunch?
I think it's best if we kept a professional relationship right now.
Right, yeah, well, this is completely professional.
It's a work problem.
It's just from my other job.
Oh, can't Sock or Ben do it?
Well, this problem really needs
somebody who's smart.
Oh, I can see your dilemma.
Okay.
Okay, yeah. I could use a break.
Look how happy they are. How am I supposed to vessel this guy?
- I don't know. - String cheese?
- Yeah, thanks. - No problem.
It's just so unfair that the Devil
is always ruining true love, you know.
And I'm just trying to figure out a way
where just one time the Devil doesn't win.
Because love is worth fighting for, right?
Yeah.
Strawberry?
What are you doing?
Having snacks.
Oh my God.
- Okay. - What?
This was all a setup. You just wanted to get me in the car
so that you could talk about love.
That is crazy.
Is it? Okay.
Then what is this for?
For later?
All right, fine. Yes, this is somewhat of a setup.
Fine, but you gotta give me some credit.
I'm trying to win you back here.
Give you credit for what, Sam?
You're trying to trick me, manipulate me.
- Do you know who that sounds like? - No.
Morgan. And the Devil.
Come on, you're being influenced by them more and more every day.
No, but I'm trying to do something good.
Isn't that... aren't you the least bit charmed?
That's not the point.
Andi, no, wait. Whoa, where are you going?
I don't know. I don't know.
I'm walking home.
Hello. Hello, baby.
- Wait wait wait wait. - What? What? What?
Don't look. Don't look.
Okay.
- You ready? - Uh-huh.
Open your eyes.
I decorated with human furniture.
Oh, yes, it's lovely.
I just wanted you to feel at home.
Oh, baby.
What's that?
I got good news.
Now remember how I said I didn't want to fly
because I wanted to save it for our special day?
- Well, I was afraid. - Of flying?
No, of loving myself and letting myself be loved.
Oh. And that's good news?
That's great news because I've figured it out...
how to love myself.
I just have to remember how wonderful I am.
And that's where this comes in...
my vision board.
It constantly reminds me of my best qualities.
Friendly... that's me.
I love that about myself. I'm very friendly.
The Brooklyn Bridge...
I'm just like that bridge. I bring people together.
I do not collapse under pressure.
These guys... just like me with Sock and Sam...
boys, friendship, bromance.
Is any of this making sense?
I think so.
So do you want to go flying tomorrow or not?
I do. I absolutely do.
Tomorrow night for our special anniversary
you and me... we're flying to the moon.
Oh, baby.
You would suffocate and freeze before we got there.
But okay, tomorrow.
Hey, what's that one?
Oh, nothing. I just like bunnies.
Oh, pop a wheelie, that's cold.
Where are your waders?
Waders? I don't need them.
I like to feel the water. Helps me locate the fish. You know what I mean?
Here we go. All right.
Oh, okay.
I got it.
You are a terrible fisherman.
Yeah. You know, I just thought
maybe it would be a good idea for you and I
to come out here and bond a little,
spend some quality time together. And look at this.
Look at what we're having... good times, GTs.
Yes, good times.
Listen, I feel like
I could ask you anything, Dad.
So here's one for you...
and this is purely hypothetical, by the way...
what if, you know,
I wanted to ask your daughter out on a date?
That is outrageous to consider.
Yeah yeah, I know, but I'm serious though.
I know the whole stepbrother-stepsister thing is a little weird.
That's of no importance.
Look, Sock,
you are certainly a nice boy...
Thank you.
...and a funny kind of clown.
You can just say "charming."
Kristen would not date you.
You aren't good enough for her.
Excuse me? Not good enough?
You have silly clown hair
and a big honking clown nose, eh?
Honk honk.
Is that funny? I'm really funny? I'm a big laugh to you?
Well, check this out... your daughter wasn't laughing
when she gave herself to me, so...
You soiled my daughter?
Soiled? No no no.
No, not soiled, no no. I made the sweetest love to your daughter.
I cherished her virginity.
I cherished every moment of it.
No no no! Ow!
What the hell was that for?
Ow! Ow! All right.
Where do you want me to go?
Look, are you happy now?
Hey, Sam. How are you?
I'm doing all right. I just wanted to check on you.
Oh, it's all good in here.
Are you still a grape guy?
No, thanks.
Do you have a second to talk?
Yeah, sure.
And now I'm supposed to send this guy Billy back to hell
even though he's not evil
and even though he found the love of his life.
Sam, I actually envy the guy.
I'd rather be a soul running free for one day
than to be stuck in this decaying body forever.
He's out there getting friendly with the ladies.
I can't even get close to your mom,
or any other woman for that matter.
Yeah, you're right.
Because you're a decaying body.
Thanks, Sam. Rub it in.
No no, I'm saying I think I have an idea
for how to keep Billy out of hell.
I don't know about this.
This is gonna work. It has to, 'cause I don't have any other ideas.
Digging up a grave seems wrong.
Disturbing the dead is some bad mojo.
In this case, the dead is across town sleeping in his new girlfriend's house.
We're just disturbing his old corpse.
So you think a dodgeball is gonna work on his dead body?
Maybe hell will think it's a mix-up. If not, we gotta send Billy back.
Well, either way we get to enjoy the night air
- at a desecrated cemetery. - Found it.
"Billy Boyland, born 1971, died 1993."
Dug up 2009.
So how did it go with you and Kristen's dad?
Well, he called me a clown,
said I wasn't good enough to date Kristen
and attacked me with a fishing rod.
I had to escape by swimming across the lake.
That's terrible, Sock.
Honestly, compared to some other times when I met the parents,
it didn't go that badly, Benji.
You know, he didn't pull a gun on me
and try to rip off my genitals.
Sounds like he's got a soft spot for you.
- Finished. - Oh, yeah?
Oh!
- Oh, is that Billy? - I don't know what that is.
- He was hit by a truck. - Yeah.
All right.
Whoa.
You always were good at dodgeball.
Got my vessel?
Got my money?
Place the vessel on the mat.
It looks like it might be too big.
Right, yeah.
Have a nice day.
Wait, I don't have to sign anything?
I just want to make sure I get the credit.
Okay, great. Thank you. Perfect.
- What's that? - Red notice.
- What does that mean? - It means there was something
other than a soul inside. What'd you put in there, potatoes?
No no, I didn't even...
Sam's the one that got the soul.
Hey, douchebag, what did you do?
I didn't do anything. It was probably just a glitch.
Well, you gotta fix it.
What are you...? I'm not fix...
No no no.
Stop. No.
Ow! Ow!
Don't you ever try to screw me again.
This was amazing. Thank you.
My pleasure.
So are you ready?
Completely ready. Let's do this.
Okay.
Wow.
This is the perfect night for flying.
I say we fly out to the water,
cruise along the coast a little bit,
and then we'll fly inland.
I can't do this.
- What? - I know how important it is to you,
but I can't do it. I just now realized
that it's not that I don't love myself enough.
It's that I'm super-afraid of flying and falling.
I'm sorry, Nina. I'm sorry,
but no no no.
Look, baby, can I tell you a secret?
Of course.
Okay.
A long time ago I had hemophobia.
That ain't right. My cousin's gay.
No no, hemophobia.
It's a fear of blood.
Well, you love blood.
I know. See, that's what's crazy.
I just had to confront my fear
and immerse myself in it.
And once I did that,
it was great. I loved it.
And now I could bathe in it every single day.
That's nice for you.
No, but I can help you too.
The question is, will you let me?
Yes, Nina. Please help me.
Perfect.
What are you doing? No no.
Oh!
Ow!
You jammed up the system, Sammy.
Ow!
The system is made of cogs.
And every cog must play its part.
Okay, please stop. Please please stop.
This little cog here
had to muck up the machinery, huh?
And now look what you're making me do.
Oh! Agh!
I'm sorry. I'll get Billy.
Please, I'll get him. I swear.
No, you won't. You can't.
And the sad thing is,
I won't be able to get him either.
The Ender will.
What is the Ender?
My failsafe.
I had it created
for the rare occasion when a soul gets lost
or if some idiot tries to bring a corpse back in its place.
The Ender is released,
tracks the soul down
and destroys it, utterly destroys it.
And that means one less soul for me in hell.
Well, just call the Ender off.
Oh!
Call it off?
Can you call off the Terminator?
You can't reason with it.
You can't stop it.
Isn't there anything we can do?
No, the die's been cast, buddy.
Nice going.
Your pal Billy's gonna wish he was back in hell
by the time the Ender's through with him.
Missed me.
Hey, there's my hero.
I came to warn you. There's this thing called the Ender.
The Devil says it's coming to destroy your soul.
Oh, man.
Why can't anything ever go right for me?
I'm sorry, Billy, but you lost your virginity
and you fell in love.
But I'm still a virgin.
What?
I wanted to connect emotionally
before we connected physically.
Well, you'd better start connecting physically quick
because I have a feeling you're running out of time.
I can't rush it, dude. It's not just about me.
It's about Cindy's pleasure too.
It says so right on the condom box.
Maybe I can buy you some time,
but we need to get you two out of here.
It was amazing. One second I'm about to eat the sidewalk,
the next... I'm soaring through the city
cradled in Nina's arms, her demon breath keeping me warm.
Focus up, Benji, come on. This has to be the perfect love chamber.
The kid's gonna need all the help he can get. You know what I mean?
Just one second.
Nice.
Smile. Smile.
Hello.
Welcome to storm command central.
We have everything for you to feel safe.
We have flashlights on the dresser
and daiquiris and lotion on the nightstand, okay?
Also, please feel free to peruse my collection of adult erotica,
both in print and DVD.
Why did we have to come here?
It's safer to wait out a storm with friends.
Exactly, so we're gonna leave you two alone
and check out the weather channel. Billy, you'll let me know when...
I'll let you know when the storm passes.
Okay, great. Let's go.
Come on, guys.
I can't believe he's not done yet.
I'm impressed, man. Billy's a stallion.
Smart. Girls talk to each other.
You're only as good as your last job. You know what I mean?
Oh, look.
Holy crap, this is bad.
Go go go go.
- We have to get Billy. - Go go.
Billy, come on! Billy!
- Billy! - Come on, Billy!
Argh!
Argh, come on!
Is it gone?
Yeah.
What just happened?
Hey, guys.
- Hey, Billy. - He's finally up, you dog.
Bobbity bobbity.
How does it feel to finally lose your virginity?
How does it feel, boys? Let me just show you.
Oh.
I won't be needing this.
Intercourse cured your asthma?
No, but Cindy's a pharmaceutical rep,
so she gets them for free.
- Ah, aces. - Congratulations, buddy.
Do we know what happened, why the Ender didn't come for me?
Ben has a theory, actually.
Yeah, so during the act of love
or at the exact moment of consummation
two souls became one... yours and Cindy's.
It's like the Ender lost your scent.
They say the Devil has no dominion over true love.
So am I out?
Yeah, I mean,
the Devil thinks you were destroyed by the Ender
and I don't even have a vessel to capture you.
So yeah, that's it.
How can I ever repay you guys for this?
I'm gonna spend the rest of my days
making Cindy happy.
- Good luck, Billy. - Good luck, Billy.
Bye.
Something good happened here today, boys...
a geek escaped from hell;
a geek banged a cougar,
a geek walks away a little bit less of a geek.
And we helped.
It's like we're his fairy bone-mothers.
That has a nice feeling.
Finally a happy ending to this crap job.
- No kidding. - Isn't that Morgan?
- Whoa. - Wait wait wait wait.
What's up, dude?
- No. - Stop!
Wait, Morgan. Stop.
- What are you doing? - Hey, it's the fellas.
Oh, Dad told me you tend to fall for those sob stories,
so he sent me to do the job you couldn't do.
- Give it to me. - Hey, easy, man.
Your conscience is clear.
You didn't want to send him to hell. Now you don't have to.
I'll do it. And everyone's happy, right?
Hey, you got a second?
That depends.
You're not gonna pull out some champagne on me again, are you?
No no, this is strictly work-related.
I wanted to ask you if I could leave early tonight.
There's something I have to do.
I'm gonna need a better reason that that, Sam.
Morgan took him. Morgan took Billy. He's back in hell.
Oh, I'm sorry.
It's not fair. I try to do something good,
something to make this whole thing tolerable,
and it's always taken away from me.
Well, if it makes any difference,
you have the rest of the night off to do whatever you need to do.
Thank you. I'll make it up to you.
Okay. You want company...
you know, as long as it's not a date?
No, it's definitely not.
Hey, where have you been hiding all day?
And where are you going?
Back to Japan.
School's over and I'm going home.
Going home? Why? You're in school?
Yes, Sock, hotel management school.
Don't you remember me studying all the time?
You were gonna leave and you weren't gonna tell me, Kristen?
How could you do that?
I was afraid it would be too painful.
Okay, but look, you don't have to leave.
I talked to your dad already, and once he gets tired of beating me,
we can eventually be happy together, you and me.
I'm so sorry, Sock.
In Japan I was afraid
of having my life planned out for me.
So I decided to come to America
to discover who I was.
And then I found you.
And you helped me
discover so much about myself.
I came to America as a girl,
but because of you
I leave it as a woman
who has discovered both her sexuality
and her ability to manage an extended-stay hotel.
Right.
I owe all of that to you.
Kristen.
Yes?
You're welcome.
Sorry, Billy. We did everything we could.
This ground looks freshly dug up.
Yeah, we did that.
Okay.
Well, he was happy for a little while.
It has to mean something.
I hope so.
Yeah.
You're trespassing.
You can't be here. I'm gonna call the cops.
Alan?
Alan!
Alan. Alan.
Alan, wait.
Damn it.
Alan!
I know you're out there.
I'm gonna find you.