That's how you're going to treat me when I love you?
Huh?
I love you!
- I'm sorry. Who is Keith? - I don't know any of these
people you're talking about.
Hey, Dor, I'm going to come in. Okay?
Are we doing okay in here?
Uh-huh. Good. Yeah.
- Good, good, good. - I just need to sit down.
Elliott.
- Yeah? - We killed him.
Keith's dead. We killed him.
- I know. - What do we do, Elliott?
I don't know what to do. What do we do?
Shh, shh, shh.
So, um, Chantal wants to take us all out to dinner.
So we're going to go to dinner.
And that's what we're going to do.
- Okay? - What?
- Okay, I need you to stand up. - No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
- I can't go to dinner. - Whoa!
They want to go to dinner. We're not going to go to dinner.
We can't go to this dinner, right?
Okay. I understand that there is
a body folded up in a closet.
And we have to deal with that, okay?
And we will. But we are going to go to dinner.
Then we're going to come back from dinner.
Then everyone else is going to go to sleep.
And then the three of us are going to deal with the thing
and be done with it, okay?
But right now, I need all of us to do our best to pretend
that we are good, normal, non-murdering people.
- We're not murderers. - Exactly.
Very good, Dor.
Okay?
- Okay. - Okay.
Hey, guys? I need to eat!
My blood sugar levels are crashing.
I hate her so much.
Oh, my God, you guys.
I did not just eat that entire basket by myself, did I?
Oh, my God, I didn't realize how hungry I was.
- Oh, no. - You've been through a lot.
You eat as much popcorn shrimp as you need, girly girl.
No, seriously, though, you guys, I don't usually eat this much.
How many calories do you think are in this?
That's probably, like, 2,000 calories.
Stop it.
Matthieu, uh, where do you live?
Because I feel like we could, uh, drop you off.
Yeah. That'd be good.
Dory, I think Matthieu
is going to keep hanging out with us.
We just got to get up really early tomorrow, so...
No, I thought we could hang out at the house
and watch a movie and just sort of play it by ear.
You guys, aw. It's just hitting me
that this is my last night off the grid.
And I kind of want to get effing lit.
- Whoo! - You know?
- Yeah. - I don't think that's a good idea.
Yeah, no, I've been
- driving all day. - Aw, come on.
We... We should go home.
Guys, perhaps this will make everyone happy.
This will turn your frowns upside down.
Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny Whoops, Johnny Whoops.
Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny.
Okay.
Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny Whoops, Johnny Whoops.
Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny.
No!
You still didn't get it!
I did exactly what you did.
- No. - Portia?
- What? - Have you chosen a room yet?
- No. - Maybe you and Matthieu
should go take your pick, wink wink.
No, no one is leaving until Matthieu gets it.
This guy's so stupid.
We're going to be out here till morning.
I know. I know.
Drewsky, Drewsky, can you do it?
Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny Whoops, Johnny Whoops.
Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny.
Drew's got it. He's got it. He got it.
- That's what I did. - Excuse me.
Come on. You guys are making fun of me because...
Oh, I'm the silly French Canadian man.
Um, my bus left hours ago.
Look, Dory, we can still call the police.
- Okay. - Okay?
Good people would call the police.
Let's call the police.
Okay, what are you going to tell them?
We'll tell them the truth, Elliott. It was self-defense.
Okay. But, Dory, was it self-defense?
Because it sounded a little foggier than that to me, so...
Yes. Yeah, it's true.
Are you hurt anywhere?
I mean, no. But, I mean, I did hit my head earlier. I just...
I don't have a bump or anything. I just have a headache still.
- Okay. - Look, Elliott,
when I got in the kitchen, he had her pinned down.
- There was blood everywhere. - Okay. I get that.
But, Dory, like, why would this guy want to hurt you?
And do not say, "I don't know."
I don't know. I mean, I... other...
other... other than I... I don't... I don't know.
It's okay, it's okay. Hey, Dory?
Why was Keith on top of you?
It was because I felt threatened.
I mean, I felt threatened. So I... so I tased him.
Dory, I'm sorry.
You... you tased him first? That can't be true, right?
Please tell me that's not true.
- Please tell me... - Well, then it's not... No.
- Tell me. - I just... I just need a...
need a second to think about it, though,
- for a second. - Okay. Okay. Okay.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
But this is not looking good, okay?
Drew, you buying a bus ticket to leave Montreal
and the fact that you bludgeoned the guy
that your girlfriend was cheating on you with, I'm sorry.
That is so sketch. Okay?
Add that to the fact that we stuffed a guy in a closet
and left him there for hours while we all went out to dinner?
I mean, it is so, so, so sketch.
That was your idea, though, Elliott.
Okay. I know! I know! We were all involved.
Okay? We all moved the body.
And I guess that's, like, a felony or whatever.
And we could serve up to, like, four years in prison, alone,
- for just doing that. - Okay. Now, I can't.
I can't. I'm going to call. I am calling the police.
No, no! Elliott! Elliott!
Stop! No! Elliott! Ow! Drew!
Okay. Okay, Dory, Dory, was it self-defense?
Yes or no?
He was attacking me.
Or maybe he was just talking to me.
It's all still very muddled.
Okay. Okay.
So in her own words, "He was attacking me."
But maybe he was just talking to me.
"It's all still very muddled."
So, Drew, do you want to tell that to the police?
Then... Then we turn ourselves in.
Okay, then we go to jail?
Do you want to go to jail, Dory, Canadian jail?
I don't want to go to jail. Do you want to go to jail, Drew?
No, I don't want to go to jail.
Then I'm going to leave it up to Dory.
Dory, what do you want to do?
I want it to not have happened.
Okay. Then, we need to get some shovels.
- Hey, look. - What is this?
Dory, look at our cart. Okay?
It's obvious that we're burying a body.
Okay, so we need to get other stuff so that we look innocent.
Okay. No, now it just looks like we're burying a baby.
- Okay, Drew? - Why? Who said that?
- Who said that? - Stop.
Totally! I can't believe we're still partying
when we have to hit the road by 8:00 A.M.
If you think about it, that means we should probably
wake up by 6:00 A.M. if everyone wants
to get in the shower. I think we should call it.
I'll sleep when I'm dead!
What a fun thing to say, Chantal!
- Portia, Portia, Portia! - What?
Have sex with Matthieu already. What's going on?
I'm trying. But it's not like
I haven't given him the green light.
When we were at dinner, he was all like,
"Oh, I love pretty blond women." Yeah.
And then, he brings the coke,
which to me is flirty. I'm just confused.
Because I wore, like, my hottest shorts.
Where did Drew and Dory go?
They went to bed, so.
Oh, losers!
It's the biggest one they have.
- That's not big enough. - You don't know...
- I think I should get in. - ...unless you know his body.
- No. - You know it so well,
you know if it'll fit in a...
Hey. You got to get the zebra print one.
It's the same size, it has more compartments in it.
And it's 25% off.
Okay. Uh, I think we like the black one, thank you.
But this one's cheaper.
- Yeah, we know. - And it looks more expensive.
Okay. I think we just want the black...
You don't know what you want!
Okay.
Good, six.
My turn.
That's so good.
Matthieu, when are you going to go for it with Portia?
I'm not.
So then go home.
Sorry, sorry, I just meant more like, "Why?"
What's up? And what are you waiting for?"
Et cetera.
I find your Johnny Whoopsie, uh, prank
to be very disrespectful,
and I'm not going to stand for it.
- I did ballet. - Yeah, but that doesn't
- get you anywhere in life. - And, look, I'm going to sleep here
on the sofa tonight.
Because it's late and I don't want to bother my friends.
I don't like you.
And I don't like your attitude.
Okay.
Matthieu, let me just say, I completely understand.
I think Johnny Whoops is... it's a twisted game.
Okay? And it's... it should be outlawed.
Also, you know it's not really a prank game, right?
I can, like, tell you how to do it, if you want.
So at the end, you just cross your arms like this.
So this whoops, it's a red herring.
It's actually just this.
Oh.
Oh, my God. Show her. Show Portia.
Hey, Portia.
Yeah?
Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny Whoops, Johnny Whoops.
Johnny, Johnny, Johnny, Johnny.
Don't put the shovels on the counter.
I'll walk around.
We're going to go see what the upstairs looks like.
- Oh, you're so obvious. - Chantal!
Aaah!
So it's just us.
We should probably go to bed
like everyone else, don't you think?
You go ahead. I just want to, like...
I want to, like, soak up
the last couple hours of my escapism.
- You know? - That's so cool.
Hey, have you ever done, like, a Sleeping Beauty?
It's wild.
No. What's that?
Okay. It's like a sedative high.
Most people think sleeping pills are, like,
weirdly, just for sleep, which is so lame.
Actually, when you mix it with coke like an upper,
it's, like, the best spiritual high.
You fall down tunnels of light for hours.
That's exactly what I need.
Okay. I knew you'd be down, bitch.
Let me go upstairs and get my dopp kit.
Okay.
Hey. Were you able to clean up at all?
- No. - Okay?
I just put everyone to bed.
Now let's get the out of here
- before the sun comes up. - Okay.
Okay?
I feel like you should've just gotten a black bag.
- One, two, three. - Oh, God. Careful.
Oh, Jesus.
Okay, wait a minute, just bend... just...
Oh, god. It's so stiff.
Okay. Uh, maybe if there's a way
that we can just put him
in a fetal position and jam him in there.
No, no, it's too small. The bag's too small. I told you!
This is the biggest bag that they had, Dory.
Shh, shh, okay. I think if we truly can just...
I'm sorry. But just, like, crack...
Guys, are you up?
Oh, shit. Oh, shit.
Okay.
- Hey, Porsh. - Hi.
Oh, Dor, oh, I don't know about Matthieu.
- Oh, yeah? - I think he might be really dumb.
He puked. And then, he still wanted to do it.
And I just need a second to think about it.
Totally, yeah, let's go sit on the couch.
- Let's talk about it. - No. I need to get a glass of water.
I'll go get it for you. You go sit.
I'll bring it to you.
Okay. What's going on?
You guys are being so weird. I feel very left out.
Well, why won't you just let me get you a glass of water?
- I can get it myself. - Hey, no, Portia, stop!
Stop! Stop right there, stop.
Whoa, why?
Portia, hi, sweetie.
Hi. Just trust us.
- Why? - If you go in this kitchen,
your career will be ruined.
You guys are being crazy. Is Drew in there?
I can't be the only one that doesn't know.
- That's insane. - Portia, Portia, listen to me.
I want you to imagine the worst thing possible.
- Okay. - It's worse than that.
And if you go in there, you're choosing to be a part
of something that's very big.
And... And it's very bad. So just go to sleep, okay?
- Okay. - Okay.
Fine.
Whatever.
- I have to know. - Portia, no!
No! No!
No, shh, shh, shh.
Shh, shh, shh.
You have to be quiet.
Otherwise, you're going to wake up everybody else.
What is that? Is that a real person?
Yes, this is all very real.
- Is he dead? - Yes.
What's going on? What's happening?
- Why is he in a suitcase? - Okay. It was all just a...
- What... What are you doing? - ...terrible mistake, okay?
It was a misunderstanding. Drew was trying to help me.
And I was trying to help Chantal.
And it just happened.
You killed him?
We didn't mean to. It was an accident.
- Okay. Who is that? - It's Keith.
Keith, Keith, remember Chantal said
that she didn't know Keith?
- Yes. - So why would you kill him?
- We didn't mean to kill him. - Okay.
We didn't mean to kill him. It just happened, yeah.
Did you call the police?
No, calling the police isn't an option anymore.
I really wish I didn't see this.
- I know. - I would've actually preferred
- to not see this. - I know. But we told you...
And as my friend... ...I can't believe you let me
in a room with a dead guy!
Portia! I told you not to come in here.
Didn't I? We told you not to come in here.
So what we're going to do is,
we're going to take care of this.
And then, we never have to talk about it
or think about it ever again.
And we can just erase it from our lives, okay?
Oh, babe, I'm sorry. I get so dramatic.
- Don't be sorry. - I'm sensitive.
And I'm just, like, I'm just a little...
I'm just worried someone might come look for him.
- You know what I mean? - Yeah. But honestly,
the truth is, I don't think anyone will.
- Yeah. - You know?
He was just kind of, like, a loser.
Yeah. He had, like, a sad life. He was an isolated P.I.
- It's like he never even existed, so. - Yeah.
What about, like, family or...
Like, does he have a family?
He has an ex-wife.
- Okay. - But he doesn't have a family, really.
You know?
- And he has a daughter. - Mm-hmm.
Oh, my God, Dory. He has a daughter?
- That makes me feel sick. - Jesus Christ!
Dory, that makes me feel sick.
Guys, guys, guys, guys, guys, guys, guys, guys,
I've obviously made a million mistakes.
Okay? I shouldn't have dragged you all into this.
And it was so stupid.
I mean, every... everything I did was for nothing.
I'm sorry.
I'm so, so sorry.
I don't know what else to say.
Dory.
Dory, sweetie, you know what I think?
I think if we sort of snuggle him up in the fetal position,
he's going to...
he's going to fit right into the suitcase.
Okay. Let's... Let's just stop here.
Okay. Okay. All hands on deck, guys.
It's a lot harder to dig a hole than you would think, weirdly.
Shh! Shh! Portia! Portia!
- God! Oh, my God! - Oh, God.
- It's so creepy. - Okay. Okay.
- Let's go around there. C'mon. - It's nothing.
- We can't bury him here. - Let's just go around there.
Come on, Portia, get it together. Let's go.
- She's watching us. - Okay. Are you happy?
- Do I look like that? - No.
Drew?
Ow-wee!
Drew, are you awake?
Portia?
I'm just going to bunk with you, okay?
Because my bed is so cold.
Okay. Okay.
My foot hurts.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, what are you doing?
Nothing. I just want to get his cellphone
and delete all the text messages and get his wallet.
Okay. Well, I really think we should leave
all the stuff the way it is. Don't you think?
No, but it'll be better that way.
Because in case anybody finds it,
they won't be able to identify him.
What is that?
I guess he just wanted the reward money.
Ow, God, my feet are hurting so bad!
Yes, everything about this is uncomfortable, Portia.
Elliott, I think can complain a little bit, Elliott.
We're literally digging a grave.
It's just such a weird way to end my day.
Okay. What is going on? This hole won't get any deeper.
It won't get any goddamn deeper. What's going on?
All right, Ell, why don't we just calm down
- a little bit? Okay, pal? - Okay. I don't understand.
I don't understand. How is this pile of dirt so big
but this hole is so small, Drew?
- Explain it to me. - It's small. It's small, pal.
How is this so big and this is so small?
- Why don't you take a break? - I don't need to take a break!
- Okay. - I just need to know
what the is going on! Okay?
Elliott...
- I'm fine. - It's okay.
- I'm ready to keep digging. - Okay.
Are you going to bone me or what?
No.
I think it looks good. It looks good.
It just looks like dirt. I think we should go.
Okay.
Guys, guys, guys, shouldn't we pray or something?
- Absolutely not. - No, let's go.
A man is dead. We have to say something.
We're not animals.
Dory, you knew him. You want to say something?
I didn't have any connection to him.
Can we have a moment of silence then, please?
Fine. Everyone bow your heads.
Can you guys just turn off your phones for one second?!
- It's not me. - It's not me.
I don't have mine. I don't have my phone.
So it wasn't me.
What?
It's Keith's.
God.
It's from his daughter.
- Oh, God. - What does it say?
"Are you with Dory?"
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