Subtitles by explosiveskull Resync by GoldenBeard
(BATS SCREECHING)
(THUNDER RUMBLING)
(THUNDERCLAP)
CATWOMAN: You think you've heard every Batman story.
I promise, you haven't.
I wouldn't have believed it myself
if I hadn't seen it with my own eyes.
And this time, curiosity almost killed this cat.
BATMAN: Shut it down, Grodd. It's over. You're finished!
GORILLA GRODD: No, I'm too close.
You will not interfere with my experiment this time, Batman.
(GROWLS)
Catwoman, don't!
(PANTING)
(GRUNTS)
(GRUNTING)
BATMAN: What?
Where am I? What happened?
(EXCLAIMS)
Hmm?
It's Japanese. And that's me.
(APPROACHING FOOTSTEPS)
SAMURAI: There he is, get him!
Samurai?
Stop! Listen to me, I don't want to hurt any of you.
Fine, have it your way.
Explain yourself.
We were sent to find the man dressed as a bat.
Our master has ordered us to kill him on sight.
He cannot be allowed to live.
Who's your master?
(HORSES NEIGHING)
(OPENING THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
None of this makes any sense.
Everything's offline.
But from the look of it, this is ancient Japan.
Which doesn't explain what's going on up there.
BATMAN: What?
(LAUGHS MANIACALLY)
- The Joker? - So soon?
That's right, Bats.
(WHISPERS) It is I.
Damn you!
(JOKER LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
Hi.
And Harley Quinn.
Oh, but you have to admit,
we really had you going there, didn't we?
That's enough. What are you playing at this time, Joker?
(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
Haven't you heard? Everyone's been calling me
Diruku Tin Mao, The Demon King.
The most powerful man in Japan.
But you can call me...
Lord Joker.
Oh, I never really wanted to be a Lord.
It wasn't what you would call an aspiration.
But when life throws you time travels,
sometimes you gotta make travelade. (LAUGHS)
Guess I have that monkey to thank for this.
If it wasn't for his stupid machine
- this tiny island would have never been on my itinerary. - (GRUMBLES)
I have to say I've really enjoyed the sushi here.
Mwah. It's even better with some sauce.
(JOKER LAUGHS EXULTANTLY)
(JOKER GROANS)
(GROANS)
Is it me, or is it getting hot in here?
Oh, don't run away. I'm your biggest fan.
(LAUGHS MANIACALLY)
Oh, now, now, Batman, don't you want to play anymore?
Oh, now look what you've done.
Poison Ivy would be very disappointed.
Mmm.
Don't you know how bad razor-edged fighting fans are for the environment?
You're the one who keeps throwing them.
Because you won't let them hit you.
(BOTH LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
Looks like you're fresh out of those fans.
So what are you going to do now, Joker?
- Oh, I've got options, Bats. - (LAUGHS MANIACALLY)
I've still got Harley,
- and an army of Samurai who have you surrounded. - (SNAPS FINGER)
BATMAN: Seven to one, I'll take those odds.
(MUFFLED CUNNING LAUGHTER)
(GRUNTS)
(GASPS)
Should we go after him, Lord J?
I've got people.
Let's just enjoy the moonlight.
(EXCLAIMS SATISFACTORILY)
We have all the time in the world.
SHOGUN: Move, move. He can't be far.
- (MEOWING) - Huh?
(MEOWING)
Don't be afraid.
It's just a little catcall.
Catwoman?
CATWOMAN: When I saw the Joker's samurai on the move,
I figured something was up.
I'm glad it was you.
How did you get here?
Same as you. Gorilla Grodd's time machine.
That was two years ago.
How is that even possible?
I downloaded these before the time jump. Maybe they can help.
JOKER: Say what's your business, monkey.
PENGUIN: Why have you brought us here?
GORILLA GRODD: Criminals of Gotham City, I've gathered you here
to unveil my greatest invention.
NIGHTWING: Red Hood, this is Nightwing.
The lead paid off. It's like a criminal convention here.
RED HOOD: Yeah, I can see them from here too.
ALFRED: Well, the Mayor's party's tonight.
I wasn't alone.
They were all there too.
Nightwing, Red Hood,
Red Robin, and Robin.
So where are they?
I don't know.
I haven't seen any of them.
But since arriving, Gotham's criminals have run wild all over Japan.
GORILLA GRODD: Behold, The Quake Engine.
Now, witness as I become master of time and space,
and bend them to my will.
(PEOPLE SCREAMING)
CATWOMAN: There are no more images.
The rest are just audio files.
BATMAN: Grodd's machine must have affected the data transfer.
JOKER: Now it's all upside down.
I think that monkey has been mucking with our heads.
GORILLA GRODD: You will not interfere with my experiment this time, Bat...
So the Joker is just the unwitting beneficiary of Grodd's experiment.
Well, no one ever said he didn't thrive in chaos.
BATMAN: But we were there at the same time,
why the two year difference?
CATWOMAN: Who knows how time travel works?
Grodd delayed me, and it must have affected the jump.
A matter of seconds then, turned to be two years now.
Selena, may I ask what were you doing there that night?
I can tell you I never thought I'd end up here.
I followed Gorilla Grodd to Arkham to see what he was up to that night.
If it was any good, I was planning on stealing it.
And the criminals?
Like the Joker, they've taken over.
They've deceived all the Sengoku Daimyos
and become lords of their states.
Sengoku Daimyo?
That's right.
This period in Japan was a feudal era of warring states.
CATWOMAN: Yes. Each of Gotham's criminals is trying to conquer and unify Japan.
The Penguin has seized control of the state of Kai.
He skirmishes repeatedly with the neighboring state of Echigo,
where Poison Ivy rules.
(PENGUIN LAUGHING CUNNINGLY)
PENGUIN: Fly, my fine-feathered friends.
POISON IVY: I'll bury you in the dirt, you old buzzard.
CATWOMAN: In the state of Nutsu, Deathstroke reigns supreme.
DEATHSTROKE: Once my fortress is complete,
it'll be my turn to strike. Yeah.
CATWOMAN: Two-Face has taken control in the state of Omie.
Near the capital.
He has become a vassal of the Joker.
TWO-FACE: Let's see, what will my next move be?
CATWOMAN: But right now, the feudal lord who is closest to unifying Japan
is the Joker.
(JOKER LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
(HARLEY QUINN LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
BATMAN: So they're all trying to takeover this country and rewrite history.
We have to find Gorilla Grodd. Have you seen him?
Not recently.
Why don't you and I join forces, Bruce?
Join forces?
I want to go home. Two years is a long time to be away.
Okay. But no tricks, Selena.
Swear.
We just have to get into that tower.
Joker keeps Grodd's time machine in there.
This missionary look is not bad.
There were quite a lot of Christian missionaries that came to Japan during this era.
This way you won't look too suspicious as a westerner.
The bat tonsure is a nice touch.
BATMAN: Thanks.
So, why did you bring me here?
CATWOMAN: I wanted you to see this.
The Joker is up to something strange.
BATMAN: Is that coal?
So the Joker is already changing the timeline.
The industrial revolution wasn't until much later.
I really doubt the Joker cares much about history.
My guess is whatever he's doing,
he'll use it to become Shogun.
But it's not just the Joker.
We'll have to defeat all of Gotham's criminals to save history.
We'll need weapons for that.
If only there were someone who could help us.
Care for some tea, sir?
Ah, much appreciated.
Oh, is this is black tea?
Hard to come by in these neck of the woods.
Hope you find it to your liking.
Alfred.
It was Ms. Selena's idea. I do apologize.
ALFRED: It's a bit more rustic than you're accustomed to.
But I think it makes for a suitable bat cave.
What?
I can't believe you didn't tell me, Selena.
I know, but I wanted to see the look of surprise on your face.
There's no need to worry.
The vehicle's been well maintained, Master Bruce.
But I don't understand.
Alfred was in the Batmobile that night.
We were lucky enough to find each other here.
And we both figured it was only a matter of time before you arrived.
And here I am.
Well, I think the Joker would be quite shocked to see you in it.
Yeah, let's hope.
Well, I must confess
that I'm quite relieved Ms. Selena found you in the forest, Master Bruce.
I, for one, have always wanted to visit this beautiful country,
but I'd much prefer to do so in my own time.
Although, I must admit, I've picked up quite a few new culinary ideas.
And there's a fish I rather fancy, made with miso.
(BOTH GIGGLE)
I see you haven't changed at all, old friend.
I can't wait to taste this fish dish you've been talking about.
Didn't mean to brag, sir, but it is quite good.
I'm sure it is.
Get down!
Fire!
A direct hit! We got him.
- Huh? What is that? - Bail out.
I'm going after the Joker.
Selena, take care of Alfred for me.
You got it.
(PANTING)
Batman's comin'!
- What's that? - Batman's here
in his Batmobile!
Take aim! Fire!
HARLEY QUINN: He's beaten the gunmen and our cannons.
And he's rapidly approaching
as this fun puppet show demonstrates.
(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
He's nothing without his stupid Batmobile.
Which gives me an interesting idea.
Nice try.
Oh, Batman. The old magnetized bumper trick.
Always so clever with your technology.
Harley, activate Arkham Castle!
But, puddin', the castle isn't even finished yet.
But this is the Batman!
He's the reason we made it in the first place.
Right.
(LAUGHS CUNNINGLY)
Get ready, Joker.
(PEOPLE EXCLAIMING IN ASTONISHMENT)
What the hell is that?
This is madness.
(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
JOKER: How about a pitcher? Not a belly itcher.
Now we need a batter, not a broken ladder.
Swing batter.
Incoming.
Now, it's my turn.
BATMAN: I'm coming for you.
Ooh, storming the gate.
JOKER: Let me give you a helping hand.
Now I'll crush your favorite toy with you inside it.
Not today.
(JOKER EXCLAIMING)
Very persistent, my old friend.
BATMAN: Locked on target.
JOKER: You know what I like best about you?
You're so predictable.
(JOKER LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
Bat on a stick, one of my favorite delicacies.
Not so fast.
It's over, Joker. You're through.
No, I don't think you have that completely right.
Hmm?
(JOKER LAUGHS CUNNINGLY)
How terrible!
You can come after me, or save that mother and child down below.
Your move, Bats!
No!
(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
(BANE GRUNTING)
Bane? How did you...
(BANE GRUNTING)
(BANE GRUNTS)
BATMAN: This isn't your fight!
Go! Hurry!
Need more power.
- (BEEPING) - Wait! No!
Get moving, I'll hold them off.
Hold this!
(JOKER LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
Poor Bats. He always falls for the same tricks.
Oh, it makes me sad he's so dumb.
He's always risking his life to save ordinary people.
If you had just let them die and gone after me instead,
maybe you wouldn't find yourself in such terrible shape.
I have no regrets.
Well, what shall we do now?
Are you just going to lie there,
or are you going to entertain me some more?
I'm not here for your entertainment.
Ah, wrong again.
Now that all your toys are busted
you better start thinking what you're going to do for a second act.
Oh, if only your friends were around to come by and say hi.
Uh, puddin', look!
Huh?
(BOTH SCREAM)
I didn't mean it! I was being sarcastic!
(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
HARLEY QUINN: What? Ninja Batmen?
We got you. (WHISTLES)
Huh?
(EXCLAIMS QUIZZICALLY)
BATMAN: Nightwing, Red Robin,
who else made the time jump?
Red Hood and Robin, too.
But Red Hood is away on a recon mission
to find out what's happening in the other feudal states.
Alfred and Catwoman?
Don't worry.
Robin has already gone after them.
They should be here shortly.
And him?
Batman, this is Aeon.
He was a great help to us after we arrived here.
He's the leader of the ninja clan.
BATMAN: Ninja clan?
We are the Bat clan of Hida.
Our lives are guided by an ancient prophecy.
Legend foretells that when the country is in chaos
a foreign ninja wearing the mask of a bat will come
and restore order to our land.
Bat clan, we have waited all our lives for this moment.
Serve this shinobi with your life.
This is the hour of our destiny.
Now, we finally look upon you,
great shinobi from across the sea of time.
Lord Batman.
Hmm.
(NINJAS GRUNTING)
Looks like a nice place.
Yes, but for how long.
The Batmobile, the Batwing, the Batcycle
they've all been destroyed at the hands of the Joker.
How do we regain the advantage when we have nothing?
Batman.
Monkichi has a message for you.
Monkichi?
It's weird, but Robin's made friends with this monkey.
He's really pretty smart.
And he understands everything I say.
(MONKICHI EXCLAIMING)
BATMAN: What is it?
He says he got it from someone in the mountain.
CATWOMAN: It's in English.
It's Grodd.
(FLUTE PLAYING)
(SIGHS SATISFACTORILY)
Oh, that feels good.
What is it about apes and humans
that we always sigh when we relax in a hot bath, Batman?
You might as well enjoy the waters, too.
No, I'm good right here.
I never would have taken you for the shy type,
but then again you are always hiding behind the mask.
Are you sure you don't want to reconsider?
(SLURPING)
BATMAN: I'm guessing you didn't invite me here
just to join you for a hot soak.
GORILLA GRODD: Such impatience.
BATMAN: Well, what did you expect?
We're only in this mess because of you, Grodd.
Why did you invent that time machine in the first place?
That's like asking why this ancient Gorilla crossed the road.
Because I could.
The criminals of Gotham were my guinea pigs.
I was going to send them some place far away, so I could take over Gotham myself.
And I would've succeeded.
The Quake Engine was my greatest invention.
But your interference brought us to this time and place.
BATMAN: How's that?
GORILLA GRODD: We are both responsible for what transpired that night.
And we will need to cooperate to get home.
What do you say, Batman?
I'll be the bait.
It's the best way to draw out the Joker.
GORILLA GRODD: Hmm. Intriguing.
(FLUTE PLAYING)
Well, it's been a while, my dear Gorilla Grodd.
Looks like this place agrees with you.
Hmm. Well well, I know this isn't just a social visit.
Where's Batman?
Clearly you've no time for pleasantries now that you've set on conquest.
Ooh, is it that obvious? It's the outfit, isn't it?
Kinda gives it away.
Imagine this entire country in total chaos.
A land full of needless suffering and pain.
It's very interesting that of all humans,
you're the one who wound up with the Quake Engine.
JOKER: Oh, I'm tired of all this chit-chat, Grodd.
I told you I'd spare your life in exchange for the Batman.
So where is he?
Huh?
Right here.
(JOKER AND HARLEY QUINN LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
We have you surrounded, Joker.
(LAUGHING)
You sure do.
(LAUGHS MANIACALLY)
Catch!
No!
Well, duh! What do you take us for?
We knew you'd have men hiding in the water.
It's a shame they all had to die.
So why don't you join them?
Maybe another time.
You're still doomed. (LAUGHS)
You underestimate your opponent, Joker.
Just like you always do.
But how? We killed you.
Ever heard of a decoy?
(HARLEY QUINN LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
Oh.
Sheesh. I never figured you'd side with Batman, Gorilla Grodd.
Anything to gain the advantage.
(JOKER EXCLAIMING)
(GROWLING)
(GROANING)
I never thought you'd need help
from a talking monkey to catch me.
I'm so embarrassed for you, Batman.
Don't be. I'm happy to disappoint.
Oh, I'd be careful. If he turned on me, he'll turn on you.
(MUFFLED SPEAKING)
I'm so grateful we were able to trust each other.
Many thanks.
But in this world, trust means nothing.
Now you will submit to my control.
Bat clan, destroy them all.
We cannot be shaken by your evil thoughts.
We have mastery over our bodies and our minds.
So you do.
Then prepare to be annihilated.
(EXCLAIMING QUIZZICALLY)
Over there!
RED ROBIN: Two-face.
You and Two-Face have teamed up, Gorilla Grodd?
That's right, Red Robin.
Don't you know Gorilla Grodd is always two steps ahead?
No!
And to what do I owe this unexpected visit, Catwoman?
Oh, I thought you might want this thingy.
Now where did you get that?
I lifted it from Harley Quinn during our fight.
It's part of your fancy quake machine, isn't it?
And what do you want in return?
Take me back to the future.
(SNICKERS) It's a deal.
I thought we could do business.
BATMAN: We have to abandon ship.
Now!
Joker?
Looking for me, Bats?
(BOTH LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
Don't do it, Joker.
We need to go! She can't stay afloat much longer.
Take the others, go!
What about you?
I'm staying. He's not getting away.
Oh, I'm really flattered, Batman.
We really don't spend enough time together.
We're just so busy.
To be honest, if Two-Face had killed you, I'd never forgive myself.
I deserve to kill the Batman.
I'm the Joker.
You're insane. You'll kill yourself.
Ugh! That's what I've been trying
to tell you, you stupid bat.
I'm having a party, in hell!
(BOTH LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
BATMAN: Joker, no!
No!
Hmm. And so it ends.
(BATS FLUTTERING)
(MUFFLED LAUGHTER)
Hmm.
(SMIRKS)
Hmm.
Mmm.
The renovations are almost complete.
Contact the other daimyos.
The battle will be at Jigokukohara, the field of hell.
We'll see who'll be shogun.
CATWOMAN: And when will we be going home?
Now, soon enough.
We still need to obtain three remaining power converters
from Penguin, Poison Ivy, and Deathstroke.
Then the Quake Engine will be complete and we can move through time and space.
Excuse me, do you mind stepping aside?
Isn't eating a banana a little cliche?
Says the cat burglar in the cat costume.
We're relieved you're with us, Master Bruce.
How long have I been out?
Two whole days, sir.
I see.
Well, what is this?
Aeon brought it by, sir.
He said the legendary mask of the Bat clan
should be worn by its rightful owner.
(RAIN PATTERING)
I had nothing.
No vehicles or weapons.
I didn't know who I was anymore.
Who was Batman, stripped of all his technology?
In my desperation, I joined forces with Grodd.
So many lost and injured because I was blind
to Grodd's betrayal, but ultimately to myself.
And yet they still insist on calling me Master.
So what are you gonna do?
Just hang it up?
What I always do, I'm going to fight.
I was wrong.
I thought I had nothing.
But I have more than I thought.
I have my mind, my body, my spirit...
and all of you.
That's more than enough.
This time and place has its own rules.
And if we're going to win, it's time we played by them.
I swear
their faith in me will not be squandered.
We will master the ways of the ninja.
Our weapons will be everything that exists.
And I will turn their legend
into reality.
NIGHTWING: The techniques of the ninja are extremely effective.
If we can combine their martial arts skills
with modern innovations and combat,
Grodd won't know what hit him.
If they attack us with their mobile fortress, we will out-maneuver them
and strike back with everything we've got.
BATMAN: Will it work?
RED ROBIN: The craftsmanship of the ninja blacksmiths is incredible.
The precision of their weapons can't be matched even by our 21st century standards.
(DOGS BARKING)
ALFRED: The wild game and produce here are exceptional.
I'm planning a high protein diet.
Perhaps some boar steak for dinner tonight, sir?
BATMAN: Sounds good, Alfred.
ALFRED: When the wheat is ready for harvest, we can make some freshly baked bread.
- (BATMAN CHUCKLES) - Well, you know what they say,
wars are won on full stomachs.
- BATMAN: Good thinking. - ROBIN: Hey!
Batman, Monkichi has another message.
BATMAN: Has Red Hood found them?
- ROBIN: Yes. - BATMAN: I'm on my way.
(PANTING)
RED HOOD: Excuse me.
May I have a cup of water, please?
MAN: Ah, yes, of course.
WOMAN: Oh, you must be exhausted.
It's a rather hot day for a Buddhist monk to be traveling.
(WOMAN SCREAMING)
I'll break it.
(RED HOOD GRUNTS)
Stop! Please stop!
RED HOOD: If you don't show your face, I'll break her arm.
Okay, okay, okay.
RED HOOD: I knew you were alive, Joker.
They said you were dead, but I didn't believe it.
So I've been looking for you.
Joker?
Why do you keep insisting on calling me that?
Admit it! (GRUNTS)
MAN: No! No! My darling!
No, no, are you insane?
You think I'm that stupid?
Do you expect me to believe
the Joker has taken up farming?
WOMAN: Honey?
You too! Harley Quinn!
MAN: Oh, my love. Oh, my love.
I owe you this.
MAN: Please forgive us. Please. Please.
(GRUNTING)
(RED HOOD EXCLAIMS)
- (RED HOOD EXCLAIMS) - (MAN WHIMPERING)
MAN: I don't understand.
I'm not who you think I am.
If you're still going to deny it...
(PANTING)
BATMAN: Red Hood, stop it!
RED HOOD: Batman, what are you doing here?
BATMAN: Same as you.
I heard that you had found the Joker and Harley.
Reports of foreign farmers in the area match their description.
BATMAN: So, you don't remember anything?
MAN: No.
We can't remember anything about our past.
We came here to live a peaceful life, deep in the mountains.
My wife and I, we plough the fields together.
BATMAN: I see.
RED HOOD: Don't let 'em fool you, Batman.
They're up to their same old tricks.
I'm not so sure, Red Hood.
BATMAN: I'm sorry for my friend's behavior.
MAN: When I work the land, I feel like I'm being cleansed.
It's as if everything bad inside me is being sucked out
and absorbed back into the earth.
I know it sounds silly, but my wife and I are always saying
it's like we've been reborn.
WOMAN: Honey, quick! Come, look!
There's a sprout. You have to see this.
New life...
MAN: A sprout, are you kidding?
BATMAN: Enough!
This is different. I've been tricked by them before.
There isn't the same madness in his eyes.
If you knew him like I did, you'd know he could never hide that part of himself.
It's what makes him what he is.
(HARLEY QUINN AND JOKER LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
(BOTH EXCLAIMING EXCITEDLY)
Oh, honey.
(BOTH EXCLAIMING IN HAPPINESS)
WOMAN: We did it. They're finally growing.
Bruce...
He's not the Joker. At least, not anymore.
They both lost their memories in the explosion.
There's no need to bother them.
You can't be serious.
We'll take them back with us
once the Quake Engine is operational again.
But, for now we'll just keep an eye on them.
They're not going to hurt anyone.
(GRUMBLES)
Come on, Red Hood, let's go.
I hope you're right.
(BOTH LAUGHING)
(BOTH LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
Construction's complete.
The time has arrived to destroy these upstarts and rebuild the Quake Engine.
Arkham Castle, rise!
(MEN SCREAM)
(ALL GASP)
(BARKING)
(WHIMPERS)
PENGUIN: That malicious monkey is finally on the move.
Let's take what's ours and feather this nest we've built.
Fly! Trojan Birdman Castle.
Spread your wings!
POISON IVY: I will not let this paradise be destroyed
by the machinations of men.
Juroku Plant Poison Castle.
Grow. And let them reap what we have sown.
DEATHSTROKE: Interesting.
Now we'll finally see who's the most powerful warlord in Japan.
Gakuju Sharaso Castle will blow you all to kingdom come.
Fire!
TWO-FACE: From order to chaos. All in the flip of a coin.
The enemy converges at the field of hell.
Fudo Omote Two-Face castle will meet them, and decide the fate of Japan.
(TEACUP SHAKING)
A fine tea, Alfred.
My pleasure.
All of the daimyo castles are on the move.
This is our chance.
I can't wait to slaughter them all.
Then it will truly earn the name "The field of hell."
But what matters is
the converters and the Quake Engine will all be in one place.
BATMAN: This is it.
This is our one opportunity
to defeat them and return to Gotham.
Remember, the machines, no matter how large,
are still controlled by humans.
If we can defeat the person inside the machine,
then we have a fighting chance.
Aeon was right.
I now understand the role I must play.
I am not longer the Batman.
I will be what the Bat clan calls me.
I will be their prophecy.
I will be the legendary ninja who will bring peace to their land.
I will be...
SHOGUN: Fire!
(PENGUIN LAUGHING)
This Penguin moves as swiftly on land as it does at sea!
And it's got one hell of a bite.
Watch it, you bloated bird, 'cause this plant bites back.
And I'm going to catch you in this flytrap.
(PENGUIN LAUGHS)
PENGUIN: Trojan Birdman Castle,
wind forest fire mountain transformation.
Two can play at this game.
Juroku Plant Poison Castle,
multitudes of flowers transformation.
Bullseye.
Gakuju Sharaso Castle,
rapid fire hundred cannons transformation.
Fire!
(DEATHSTROKE LAUGHS)
Not too bad.
Hmph.
Hmm?
Gorilla Grodd, leave him to me.
Fudo Omote Two-Face Castle,
two-faced transformation!
(MONKICHI EXCLAIMING)
Look! Over there.
Giant robots?
Batman, what now?
AEON: Master, leave them to us.
BATMAN: Give 'em hell!
RED HOOD: Behind us.
We're stuck between a rock and a hard place.
Come on.
(HORSE WHINNIES)
Yeah.
I appreciate your loyalty, Two-Face.
Sure. Until the coin tells me otherwise.
Tails, I stay. Heads, I go.
Your luck's run out.
I'm gonna rip you limb from limb, Grodd.
It's easy to understand the laws of probability.
(SNICKERS)
It was only a matter of time.
Let's go!
Head straight for Arkham Castle!
(GROWLING)
Look out!
(METAL CLANGS)
Well, that was cool.
(GRODD EXCLAIMS)
(BOTH SCREAMING)
GORILLA GRODD: That's enough games for now.
It's time to get down to business.
(LAUGHS CUNNINGLY)
(EXCLAIMS CUNNINGLY)
(GRUNTS MALICIOUSLY)
What are you doing now?
All of Gotham's criminals are now under my mind control.
What they do not know
is that I actually manipulated them into building their fortresses, too.
Where do you think they got the technology?
They are just pieces in a larger puzzle.
Like the feudal states of Japan herself.
Whatever it takes to get home.
Sorry to break it to you...
but you're not going anywhere.
I'm going to rule this country
and turn it into a kingdom of monkeys,
and rewrite the history of the world!
(JOKER'S RECORDED LAUGHTER)
(COUGHS)
What is...
(GRUNTS)
(HARLEY QUINN AND JOKER LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
We're back!
I love giving presents.
Out with the old and in with the new.
HARLEY QUINN: No exchanges or returns.
(HARLEY LAUGHS MANIACALLY)
Joker?
It can't be.
Hi, Bats.
You should know by now that you can't keep a crazy man down.
You never want to be too early to a party.
Right?
(LAUGHS)
Hi, pretty kitty.
You really took us by surprise back at the lake, Grodd.
But now it's time for a little payback.
The paralysis isn't permanent, but we're thinking about increasing the dosage.
Ivy's got the best plants, don't you think?
Bastard.
Now, now, now,
don't go and strain yourself.
Not that you can move anyway.
HARLEY QUINN: You too, kitty cat.
Now, in a dramatic turn of events, the Joker takes over Grodd's plan.
Sayonara!
Batman!
(BOTH SCREAMING)
(JOKER LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
It's so tough being a hero.
(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
(COUGHS)
Are both of you all right?
Don't think I didn't notice you saving Grodd before me.
But, thank you, Batman.
I see that gas didn't knock out your attitude.
I'm glad you're still with us, Catwoman.
So what now, puddin'? It looks like this thing is still plugged into their brains.
Well, that means it's time to play a few mind games.
Criminals of Gotham,
become one!
(UPTEMPO JAPANESE SONG PLAYING)
ALL: Five unite and serve as six heavenly beings.
Lord Joker!
(JOKER LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
Whoa! That thing's enormous.
This contraption is better than I ever imagined, Gorilla Grodd.
This country really will belong the Joker.
Now let's see.
What sort of chaos the super robot can unleash.
(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
ROBIN: Hurry, get out of here.
(ALL GRUNTING)
(SCREAMS)
Robin, get...
Robin!
(GROANING)
ROBIN: Gorilla Grodd?
(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
JOKER: Ooh, that was easy. Now what?
(YAWNING)
Guess I could use a nap.
So what now?
He's hurt pretty bad.
(GROANING)
Here.
(MONKICHI EXCLAIMS)
You can use this.
It controls my army of monkeys.
Use them to defeat the Joker.
I owe you for saving my life.
I promise, no tricks this time.
(MONKICHI EXCLAIMS IN EXCITEMENT)
Batman, lend us the flute, please?
Monkichi and I know exactly what to do.
(MONKICHI EXCLAIMS)
(SNORING)
(YAWNING)
(JOKER EXCLAIMS IN ASTONISHMENT)
What?
Monkeys?
(ROBIN AND MONKICHI PLAYING FLUTE)
There's millions.
(JOKER EXCLAIMING)
I can feel them. They're crawling all over me.
Get off! Get off!
They can't hang on.
(MONKEY EXCLAIMING)
ROBIN: Monmi.
- Who's she? - (MONKICHI EXCLAIMING)
You got it.
So annoying!
(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
(PLAYING INTENSIFIES)
ROBIN: (EXCLAIMS) If the bad guys are going to unite, then so will we.
Enough monking around!
I'll blow you to pieces.
ROBIN: All for one and one for all.
Their combined spirit has formed this giant samurai.
Now, witness the awesome power of the monkeys.
Together, they will deliver a devastating blow!
(JOKER GROANING)
Unexpected.
Let's move!
Storm the robot while it's down.
- ALL: Right! - ROBIN: Monkichi,
I'm leaving the flute with you.
(MONKICHI EXCLAIMS IN ACCEPTANCE)
Bruce, I'm going with you.
Harley Quinn could use a good ass kicking.
Come on.
Got to love a man who can forgive a girl for double-crossing him.
(LAUGHS MANIACALLY)
Monkey see monkey do.
JOKER: It's not how you fall, but how you pick yourself up that counts.
(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
All right.
Looks like more monkey business.
Harley, we have guests!
(HARLEY EXCLAIMS GLEEFULLY)
Why don't you greet them with a warm kiss?
Sure!
Get down!
(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
- Robin. - No!
Master, at your service.
What, again? I hate bats!
Go, go, go! Shoo, shoo! Get out of here, you stupid bats!
Go!
Huh?
(STUTTERING) Batman?
(EVERYONE GASPING)
Behold, the mighty Batgod before us.
Batman! Harley?
(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
Burn on the field of hell!
(EVERYONE GASPS)
We're coming for you.
(BOTH ROARING)
(GRUNTS LOUDLY)
(JOKER GROANING)
Time to settle this...
once and for all.
(LAUGHS CUNNINGLY)
NIGHTWING: Party's over, Penguin.
RED HOOD: Tell you what, Deathstroke,
I'll give you the first shot.
RED ROBIN: I'm gonna wipe that half-smile...
right off your face.
Poison Ivy, you know you're not a real plant, right?
(HISSES)
I see you're back to your old self again.
I was convinced you'd lost your memory, Joker.
Yeah, about that.
I had lost my memory. I was a decent man.
(MUFFLED LAUGHTER)
What a joke.
But I had to do it!
It was the only way I could get the upper hand.
I hypnotized myself to believe I was someone else, so you would believe it.
And this little flower was the trigger to snap me back to insanity.
HARLEY QUINN: We did it!
They're finally growing.
(BOTH LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
(SNIFFING)
(SIGHS IN SATISFACTION)
Harley, get ready.
Can't wait, Mr. J.
(JOKER LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
(LAUGHTER CONTINUES)
See what happens when you plant a seed
and let it grow into something beautiful?
(LAUGHS)
It's good to return to the land, get your hands dirty.
The French call it "Nostalgie de la boue."
Romance of the mud.
You have to admit, it was a great joke.
(GASPS)
(JOKER LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
The only way to deceive you was to deceive myself.
And you fell for it hook, line and flower.
(JOKER LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
Ha!
The time has finally come for you to die.
(HARLEY QUINN EXCLAIMS IN DISAPPOINTMENT)
Puddin', no!
(LAUGHS)
Time for some girl-on-girl action.
(GRUNTS LOUDLY)
Careful, don't cut yourself.
It's over, Ivy. You lost.
(HARLEY QUINN LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
Take your medicine, kitty-kitty,
and say goodnight.
Keep your tongue to yourself.
(HARLEY QUINN GROANING)
Bruce.
What am I going to do with you, Batman?
You've destroyed a perfectly good giant robot castle.
You're going to have to answer for that.
Let's end this, Joker. Just you and me.
With pleasure.
Oh, I'd hate to come all the way to ancient Japan
and miss out on a samurai sword fight.
Right, Bats?
Then you won't be disappointed.
Not too bad. Making all of my dreams come true.
- Happy to help. - Oh, don't tease.
You're getting me excited.
(EXCLAIMS) That was a good one.
Oh, you can do better than that.
Maybe you need to hit the dojo and get some more practice,
work on your feint and parry.
Ooh!
I'm going to cut you to ribbons, tie you in a bow, and give you to myself!
You're going to love it!
Ooh!
I really doubt that, Joker.
Sheesh.
Must be tough being a hero!
You don't dare kill me! Isn't that right, Bats?
BATMAN: Don't test me!
See, you can't kill me.
(JOKER GROANS)
Oh, the hero can't finish the job!
But I can.
Just look at how much fun we're having,
Batman.
(GROANING)
Psych!
(PANTS)
(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
You liked that, didn't you?
(EXCLAIMS)
(BOTH GRUNTING)
It's not over!
(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
(JOKER GROANING)
(LAUGHS MALICIOUSLY)
(GASPING)
And so it's finally over, Batman.
(JOKER GASPS)
You can't trust everything you see, Joker.
(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
Do it. Just let go.
You can't do it, can you?
(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)
The great Batman. Not such a hero after all!
(SCREAMS)
(PANTS)
(JOKER EXCLAIMING IN ANNOYANCE)
BATMAN: Thank you for all your help.
Of course. Our country can now return to the way it was.
We will never forget what you have done for us.
Thank you, Monkichi. You were a great help.
(SOBBING)
It's time for me to go. I'll never forget you.
(EXCLAIMING)
(SIGHS)
BATMAN: Activate the Quake Engine.
(SERENE MUSIC PLAYING)
(CLOSING THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
ALFRED: Master Bruce,
you'll be needing this for tonight.
Huh? Ah, right, of course.
Best not to keep the Mayor waiting.
Is the car ready?
Yes. But it's rather vintage.
(LAUGHS)
SHOPKEEPER: Tell me, where did you come across such a rare find.
I just ran across it on a trip.
I always keep my eye out for interesting souvenirs.
You didn't expect me to leave empty-handed, did you?
(HORSES APPROACHING)
(CLOSING THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
Subtitles by explosiveskull Resync by GoldenBeard
(UPTEMPO JAPANESE SONG PLAYING)