www.tvsubtitles.net
" A Two-Headed Beast "
Engine room!
This is the Captain!
Throw coal to the fuckin' boiler!
And a hard right rudder!
Hello, the galley!
Fuckin' jeroboam of champagne to the bridge immediately!
Uh, Mr. T.
Uh,
brief uh,
idle time, uh,
a harmless, uh,
wilin' away
I'm considering, Con,
being Swearengen's decided a
underling'll represent him in certain of our mutual transactions,
would it be my seemly tactic
to do likewise?
Hmm
I'd need to know my man had discipline and
appetites in fuckin' harness and the like
Well, what this is, Sir, uh
yesterday, I occasioned to fuck a woman
after a considerable period of abstention,
and that seems now to have
throwed me
unawares, uh,
into a fuckin' spasm of
sex interest,
which I
fuckin' pray will be brief
Well
I believe I'll
defer enlisting you in this other aspect
Prudent, Sir,
till I get well on the other fuckin' side
Iceberg fuckin' avoided
Looming fuckin' catastrophe
Mr. Tolliver and Mr. Swearengen are
uneasy colleagues
I wouldn't know, Sir
That feels to me less than a full verity
I don't know what that means, Mr. Hearst
That you not knowin' about any
uneasiness between Tolliver and Swearengen
sounds to me like a lie
Yeah
I guess so
Better
Would you want me saying my first loyalty was to you, Mr. Hearst,
to verity instead of Mr. Swearengen?
hat'd sound like a lie too, and peg me a liar in the bargain
So I'll have to win you away
I guess so
But I oughtn't to imagine the process will be quick
Guess not
Good, Adams
Did he coach you long?
Didn't fuckin' coach me at all, Mr. Hearst
Captain Turner
Go tell your friend I know he's afraid of me
Dority? Big guy?
I guess he looks big to you
Is that what you brought me here for?
You want me to take that back to Dority?
I guess so
Crazy nigger at the livery's in your debt
Crazy nigger at the livery ought not plan on this becomin' no habit
No chance of that
He's bound for Oregon, Miss Lady,
with the handsome nigger you're talkin' to right now, if our luck holds to the afternoon
Get off your ass and start to walkin'
Your friend might get to eat that warm
Go ahead
Put a hole in that thing
I'm measuring the stroke to move you along with the rest of this shit
Much obliged!
Travel safe
Biggest day of my Goddamn life, and I get a fuckin' spittoon spilled over my head
That you already knocked on its side when you were fuckin' dozing
I'm glad I did it
I've enough blood and guts spilt in my Goddamn place, Steve
For a lifetime, you understand?!
If it takes the contents of a spittoon to make you fuckin' wash,
then so fuckin' be it!
What does washin' have to do with the other, Tom?
Well, to put you on the fuckin' path, fuckin' respect yourself,
and the fuckin' occasion, and bring no more fuckin' shame onto my place, God damn it!
After I own the livery, you slanty-eyed bastards,
maybe you'd like to come by and look at me then!
Now get the fuck outta here!
Here!
Harry, what time is it?
Hour's 17 minutes till 10:00
67 minutes until my fuckin' luck changes forever
No harm in him showin' up early
You've done this camp a great service, Mrs. Ellsworth
You're very kind
And yet, Mr. Merrick, in candor,
witnessing the events of late in the east,
oughtn't any depositor pause and consider
before trusting
his savings to a bank?
Uh, well, I suppose that's true
Which is why
a bank owned locally
wishing to make available funds to organize and develop our community
to build businesses
and homes,
and whose deposits are guaranteed by gold not two miles distant from
this building in which we sit,
isn't that
why the depositor at the Bank of Deadwood, having considered,
ought come forward in assurance and confidence
Yes!
Yes
Have you any questions for me?
I have not, Madam
Not
not at the present moment
Well, I guess that argues for me showing Captain Cuntface how Goddamn afraid I am
It wasn't aftertalk between you and Turner?
Hearst was there when Turner said it,
and Hearst I asked did he want it brought back to you
Hearst says to me, "I guess so."
"Guess so" don't sound like Hearst
I'd said "I guess so" before
I think he was making small of me
What is there to consider over, Al?
That sea creature Turner called me out
It's Hearst calling you out
I'm trying to decipher his reason
Well, me seein' to Turner will not delay your Goddamn decipherin'
Can you shut up now, Dan, that you fuckin' couldn't before?
He hurt you,
then he calls to you like a dog
I had to tell him to fuck himself
Even as I forbore till I could see to my fuckin' arrangements
Think they'll get seen to by the snows?
Ready your pen
You're addressing me like a fuckin' field hand won't impede me cooperatin'
Now go!
That
that's it, Hostetler
'Cause I keep my sense of priority on what the fuck is important
I broke your fuckin' tip
"Mrs. Alma Ellsworth, serene and comely principal of the just opened Deadwood Bank,
assured this reporter that depositors need fear no local echo of eastern financial panics
A locally-owned bank
Careful, be careful
Uh, "Lending to develop businesses and build homes in the region,
and backed by the underground assets of one of the strongest mining concerns in the Dakota territory,
such a bank cannot help but
Do you mind if we, uh,
walk on more level ground, Mr. Blazanov?
Oh, no no no no
I'll watch out for livestock
Thank you
"Such a bank cannot help but draw prudent customers in great numbers from every area of our black hills."
Mrs. Ellsworth, being so elevated,
so sweetly radiant in spirit,
I wonder if her words resonated with me at the time as being
more poetic and compelling than
now they seem in cold transcription
And with the lady herself absent
This is bad
To abandon a friend like that when he's taken by drink
I think this is more woeful, Mr. Merrick
We shall fetch the Sheriff, Mr. Blazanov
Leon
Mr. Tolliver
That's a guilty skulkin' fuckin' look on your features, son
I think by now you'd be more come to terms with your weaknesses
Merciless conscience, Sir, since childhood
You're buyin' drugs?
I was buying drugs, yes, Sir
That is the fuckin' cross my weakness has to bear
And do you bear it for yourself alone, Leon,
or long as you're about it, with others as well and earn
the extra dollar thereby?
I do not do that, Sir, no
I got to wonder, son
is it you been helpin' Lila in her fall?
It is not, Mr. Tolliver
Lila drops her own bucket down the well
I'm telling you, Sir!
Takin' a whore o' yours down, that's next to directly robbing you
Fella like me that's been
indisposed
To show he's back in play might
cut a thief's throat
You're fuckin' misinterpreting it. I
I was copping for another but it wasn't fuckin' Lila
I was coppin' for that cunt at the bank
Their faces weren't familiar,
the men who left him here
His name was Pasco
Does Pasco have a friend here?
How do you know his name?
Cornishman, talked Union
Worked for Hearst
Do you feel there's a significance to that?
The third of those organizers's been killed
You got nothin' to say to that or on any other fuckin' topic
On Hearst's orders, you believe?
A knife to the chest,
body atop Hearst's works in the thoroughfare
I withdraw from our agreement
I'd ask it's very brief extension
No. No
Or we're both just fuckin' cowards
I ain't no fucking coward!
Though Dan might support your position
What's he talking about?
Wait a bit, Bullock
Don't go for Hearst yet
You know Al
I've got the briefest of other bidness
See to it
Yes, s-see to it, Bullock
Watching us advance on your stupid teepee, Chief,
knowing you had to make your move
did you not just want first to fucking understand? Huh?
Your repayment of the loan we make you now, Mr. Fields,
whose proceeds purchase Mr. Hostetler's livery,
is secured by the livery deed itself to be held as collateral
in the possession of the bank until the debt shall be satisfied
Understood and agreed to
And don't lose one second to wakefulness or worry
I'll repay in a timely fashion
Will you be paid in specie or currency, Mr. Hostetler?
Gold, please
Thank you, Trixie
I don't suppose a handshake
signaling the
transaction's completion is absolutely required
Then I guess we don't have to do it then
And if you're hoping to pass as a man before you hightail it to Oregon,
you will return to me that board you made me sign
Thank you so much for squiring me,
these gentlemen being so obviously compelled by other responsibilities
Such acid scrutiny by former boon companions
We was never your fucking boon companions, E.B
Forgive me my confusing, Dan,
my own deep feelings for you with what yours may have been for me
I did not offer my hotel to Hearst
which sale has made me outcast among you
Hearst forced the transaction upon me
I miss our morning coffee
Yeah?
Bein' no one is frequenting the main bar, Davey,
what in fuck business you think you're gonna do standing behind there?
Boss says I'm to attend the auxiliary bar
The auxiliary bar ain't made a cunt's hair bit of business sense since it's fuckin' inception!
Go on up and set the boss straight
Hey, you don't want to take that smart-aleck tone,
that fuckin' attitude with me, Davey
You hear me?
Hearst organizes violence between his man and Dority
Does he?
Orchestrates combat between them, mutilates me,
plants that organizer's body like a flag in the fuckin' thoroughfare
That last is fresh news
Makes of me and Tolliver a two-headed beast to savage
what might be healthy borne out of the fucking election and gnaw its own privates off-hours
Plans keep coming to the cocksucker that their final sum is this:
But for what brings income to him, break what he can;
what he can't,
set those parts against themselves to weaken
Scoundrel!
Hearst
The why's
what fucking confounds me
What's in his head, I cannot fucking find in mine
Don't suppose you talk to the Captain?
Hails and farewells, but he never replies
Or the cook?
The negress and I are not intimate
Alright, E.B
May I ask your plans, Al?
No
Only to further their achievement
No
All right
Yeah
Glad to have been of help
Always available for counsel
I dare not think what you've been through to reach us
It's been a crucifixion
Too painful, even the merest details
Formidable, even at bay
My last camp, Jack
As it may be for us all, young man
The place is yearning for elevation and festering with wealth
Oh dear
Augment of cupidity in the Iris, a healthy augury
We must help them however we can
Heave ho, young man, but slowly
It's past me
I cannot figure the fuckin' angle
Go ahead and fucking fight him
All right then
What you want to be carryin', Dan?
Nothing I would want found secreted on me,
worse comes to worst
Well don't say you ain't bringing your blade
Naked, visible in it's fuckin' sheath and disposable before we join
If he dispenses with his
If it's getting to go wrong, Dan,
you just drop down flat
What the fuck did you just say?
Drop flat if it's going wrong,
and I'll blow his fucking head off
You do and it'll be the last Goddamn thing you do on this fucking earth
Going wrong is not the end of fucking things, Johnny
Fuck no!
I have come back from plenty of shit that looked like it was going wrong
All right, Dan
He's got the advantage of you there, don't he?
That short-cropped fucking hair?
Well, he's not lacking for brass
"Come scare me in the thoroughfare."
Star City, Captain, you remember the man's name?
Leonard
That was a fight
Not how I remember
As an object lesson to every man watching
For not much fight,
it did not end quickly I suppose is what I'm trying to say
Do you understand me?
Yes, I understand
Thank you, Jack
I am your Jack, Chesterton,
but your producer too
A rigor we've always sustained
To carry a performer through illness when recovery is in prospect
is an indulgence one can sometimes justify
But support of idleness destined for the grave,
that, Chesterton,
the narrow economy of our art
does not permit
You would have me die destitute?
You will purchase your keep with that voice
intrusive and incessantly opinionated
no vagary of our past has yet stilled
The subject?
We have but one
In this instance, the theater is formerly a bordello
The eye lines must be all wrong
In the morning,
it meets with your atrabilious scrutiny
Oh
I must rest
Bellegarde?
We proceed
Costumes, Countess, will you chair?
Ja
Props and scenery, chair?
Only if you serve as second
I'm so so so so sorry
Is costumes taken?
Are they performing now?
Quiet
Civic relations
I'd appoint myself
without objection?
Will we continue as if all among us are well
when one so plainly is not?
And what committee, Bellegard,
to address the old man's mortal illness would you have us fucking form?
No committee
Committees is the task before us
No business as usual
Business and tasks is what we'll have,
just as you are tardy and ginger on your bum for the usual fucking reasons,
despite your deep personal grief
Not offered as a case for change
Civic relations is me,
and we'll include here a subcommittee for the renovation of the bordello
Supervision of the work, subcommittee head
Countess, done, with thanks
Civic relations, construction, Claudia
Countess is the second
Hiring laborers
A truth divinely writ:
we make more devotees of theater
engaging 20 laborers at $2 apiece than two of the same at $20
Busy busy busy
Is he receiving as yet?
Let me go see
Tell him last fucking call
Broken bones mortally interfering with organs is what I would like to rule out
Doc's back, Dan
Don't need the fucking Doc
Come on, Dan
Let him look at you
He come back special
You heard what the fuck I said
He wants to poke around in some innards,
tell him to work on the one I killed
Bottle?
One of the girls?
There's a clamoring line to see to you
Get the fuck out of here, Johnny
Sure
Listen for
raspy fucking shallow breathing in the course of the fucking night
Him going blue too, would hint to you to fucking come get me
Definitely
Have you ample towels?
Uh, ample, thank you
Enough hot water?
Well, I could almost wish it cooler
May I help you with your back?
What?
Scrubbing your back
Uh, I'm out--now
Thanks anyhow
Does it occur to you, banging repeatedly on the fucking wall,
either I'm not in
which makes what you're doing stupid
or being in, don't want to see you
which makes you a pain in my balls!?
Doubtless now nodding agreement like little boy fucking lost
What?
Hello
You fucking work at the bank
I do now
Not a noble "Hello" at opening,
and regal fucking look-by at the closing up of shop?
I'm at the hardware store all day, Trixie
I'll switch with you
Bank's a Jew's proper province anyways
along with the addled self-deceived
Our depositors?
The bank's founder and president, Chief Officer, as well,
of air-headed smugness and headlong plunges unawares into the fucking abyss
I-I don't understand
You wouldn't
You're too fucking healthy-minded
You'll sit here waiting for me to materialize from a piece of fucking furniture and think the world is normal
Do you want to get fucked or not?
Please
Your hair looks like a porcupine
Forgot the brush
Do you mind?
Well, no no no
That's
How's it now?
Better
Thanks very much
I haven't finished
Oh, go ahead then
Go on
Presentable?
Very
You're young for failing eyesight
Spiny too, like a porcupine?
Huh-uh
I guess it'd be unmanly to
fear I may faint
Please don't
I'll make some arrangement
What do you mean?
For my things and the like
arrange to collect my things
Will you have me
bring the little one back?
I'll collect Sofia
Don't forget
5 hours looking for this Goddamn board
Come on, come on, come on, come on, yeah
Think this is pretty fucking funny, don't you, Hostetler?
No
Watch me crawl around here like a Goddamn fool,
and you laughing up your fucking sleeve
Hostetler don't know where the board is
I'm the one hid it
Oh, I believe that
Definitely
Assisstant fucking baboon
You hid it, he don't know where and you can't remember where it is!
I wasn't too drunk not to know I should hide it,
but I was too drunk to keep track of where
Is this it?
Is this the board?
Clean it the fuck off!
Well, yeah. Ha ha ha
Bring it here. Bring it in
Unwrap that cocksucker!
What the fuck is that supposed to be?
Give him the board
You think I'm a fucking moron?
You think I'm a moron to fall for your fucking lies
Don't you call me dishonest
I'll call you that and worse
You hand me that then ride off with the actual board?
This is the actual board, wrapped in the cheesecloth that I stole off a horse
I never knew this board was took from where I had it until I looked for it during last night,
and that's when he told me that he had hid it
To keep you from doing something stupid
This is the board!
For Christ's sake, what difference does the rest of it make?
I don't know it's the actual board
There's no more fucking writing on it!
Shall I accept myself as satisfied,
only for Hostetler once escaped
to send the real fucking board back from Cheyenne
while he's laughing up his lying sleeve?
For Bullock to open the package and humiliate me?
Or for the fucking bank woman to humiliate me with the true fucking board?
Or to revoke my fucking security on my fucking loan?
Or whatever your fucked-up plan is to make me a fucking cunt!
I will not be called a fucking liar
I didn't live my life for that
Yeah, fuck you, Steve
We're leaving
Talk stupid to our fucking dust!
Yeah?
I wish you'd look in on Dan, boss
Not for being poorly as
down
Johnny,
some shit's best walked through alone
Dan's killed people before
You have too
But neither've been solitary after
A fair fight,
something Dan and I have always struggled to avoid, is different
You see the light go out of their eyes
It's just you left
and death
So that's why Dan wants to be alone
He knows where to find me
Sit down
If you want to
What are, what are we waiting for?
To see what kind of hell breaks loose
Uh, Whiskey, please
And leave the bottle
I just saw to the remains of a friend
Yes, Sir
George Hearst
Jack Young
Yes, Sir
How do you do, Jack?
How do you do?
Sheriff
Is he up there?
Who?
Is Hearst fucking up there, Farnum?
I cannot say
I cannot betray the whereabouts of an owner-guest
Mr. Hearst
I regret not being out here with you before, Sir
Help too stupid to wake me from my nap
Not at all
On down there now, Jack
At least do that much right
Helluva fucking day
How much do you know?
I heard there was a set-to in the thoroughfare
Did you know it was my man killed?
Was that the outcome?
My man was killed, yes
I'm sorry
It happens
It's the nature of things
It don't lessen the sadness
when it's a friend's
The Sheriff joins us
Whiskey
The Sheriff recently put me on notice he is vigilant of my possible transgressions
You sound drunk to me
Whom are you addressing?
You
You sound drunk
Do I?
Mm-hmm
When I say "Fuck yourself, Sheriff,"
will you put that down to drunkenness or a
high estimate of your athleticism?
Did you just tell me
to fuck myself?
I think I did and to shut up or I'll quiet you myself
You're under arrest
Fuck you,
and shut up
or I will shut you up for good
Threatening a peace officer,
I'm taking you into custody
Don't be stupid, Bullock
Don't you be fucking stupid
Fuck you
Johnny
The Sheriff eliminates several of our options
Not a fucking word comes to print
Understood