When is it too late to find love?
In science news, a joint study from two Ivy League universities
has concluded that single women over the age of 35
are more likely to die in a terrorist attack than get married.
For many young career women,
finding a husband and having children
may seem like something they can put off until later,
but delaying your wedding could mean being a bridesmaid forever.
- Great broadcast today. Very interesting. - Thanks, Carol.
I really enjoyed "Carol Tries Skateboarding."
Yeah. Quite the ride.
- How's your head? - Fine. The helmet took most of the impact.
- That's good. - Yeah.
So, um, I was wondering...
...what kind of, uh, fact-checking did you do
on that piece about women over 35?
What are you implying?
Nothing. I'm just curious about how you go about your research.
Every major news outlet is reporting that study.
It's from Harvard.
So the answer is you didn't research.
Okay.
I know it's a bummer story for all of us. I blame our sexist society.
But either way, it isn't my job to make people feel good.
No...
but if you're gonna make thousands of women in this city feel terrible,
I'd hope you'd at least make sure that what you're reporting is true.
Fucking Carol.
Over here, trying to tell me how to do my job.
I don't tell her how to put on stupid outfits and make a fool of herself.
Don't tell me how to be a real journalist.
Wow, she must've really got under your skin.
No, I don't care.
It's not my fault asshole men don't wanna marry women over a certain age.
- Don't shoot the messenger, Carol. - Oh God, the terrorist story?
She accused me of not fact-checking.
Well, did you?
Fact-check what?
Is Harvard lying to us?
Plus, everyone is reporting on this. It's on the cover of Newsweek.
I don't blame Carol for being upset. I mean, I hated that story.
- It scared the shit out of me. - Why are you scared? You're marrying Theo.
Nine years under the wire. That's if you can set a date.
Well, I'm trying to, okay? It's hard.
He wants to get married in the summer, and, you know, humidity, frizz.
And then the fall is so cold, and spring, I mean, the rain... so...
You know, if you're not ready to get married...
I'm ready. I... I've been ready.
I mean, the whole reason I broke up with Johnny is because I'm ready.
Okay, Malarkey, if you say so.
I do.
Which is exactly what I will be saying on...
May 10th.
It's perfect. Rainy season is over. It's warm but not too humid. It's decided.
Theo and I will be married in Spring.
But that's only a few months away.
I thought we'd be roommates for a little while longer.
I am not delaying any longer. I will not be murdered by terrorists.
- I don't think you understood the story. - Time waits for no woman.
Theo, hey, it's me.
Call Pip and Kitty and tell them to book a travel agent
because you and I are getting married in May.
I love you too.
Okay.
Yes. We're doing it.
Will this shift ever be over?
Ugh. They're such troglodytes.
Not like Sam.
He's so mature, and cultured, and worldly, and je ne sais quoi.
Who's Sam?
Sam Waverly.
You mean Mr. Waverly, our teacher?
He told you to call him Sam?
No. But he will. Duh.
We have a connection.
- But he's super old. - So?
Time is just an illusion. It's meaningless.
Okay, Cloud.
Still, I think you can get expelled for screwing a teacher.
Only if we get caught.
Are you two just gonna watch them destroy the restaurant?
- All right, hey, listen up. - Of course not.
Oh, Coop-eo. Coop-eo.
Wherefore did you poop-eo?
Shut up, dickhead, all right? You know I'm in the play for extra credit, right?
Coop just likes to prance around in tights.
Shut up.
Hey, I'd prance around in tights if I got to kiss Tully Hart.
You can kiss my ass.
I will if you go to prom with me.
In your dreams.
Barbara Lee Ellis High School football rules!
Whoo!
Touchdown!
Yo. What did coach say, man?
All right? People look up to us.
Set an example.
- What do I do with this? - Uh...
- I can take it. - Okay.
Come on, just get dressed. We're running late.
This wig looks like a squirrel died on my head.
And I have nothing to wear.
Mmm, slap on that pink wig Tully got you, and you're good to go.
It's Carol's retirement. Nobody's gonna be judging you.
The last time these people saw me, I was young and firm
and had both my original boobs.
Yeah, you're a boob down,
but you kicked cancer in the ass.
You powered through radiation.
You are... a warrior.
A tired, bedraggled, worn-out warrior with nothing to wear.
- Come here. - Ugh. Don't make me go.
You better be ready, Tallulah.
- Wow. - Where's Celeste?
- Oh, she... had a thing. - Bummer.
She didn't wanna stand around and listen to us talk about the good old days?
I tried to entice her with watered-down drinks,
seven-layer dip, to no avail.
- Shocking. - Yeah.
- Saw the doc, by the way. - Oh.
Yeah.
Antarctica burning. Clever.
Thank you.
Very powerful.
How'd the numbers come in?
- Gangbusters. - Really?
Well, gangbusters for PBS.
Oh, so roughly what? Hundred people, four hundred cats.
You think you're so funny.
Oh boy.
Oh my God.
Holy shit!
This is like stepping into a time portal.
KPOC, God, it's barely changed.
Oh man. It even smells the same.
- Mmm. - Mm-hmm.
Johnny, Kate. Is that you?
Carol, congratulations!
Oh! Ah, we're hugging.
Oh, you haven't changed a bit, Johnny, you handsome rogue.
Aw.
Oh, Kate. Oh my, you look...
Uh, like I have cancer.
Yes.
- Oh dear, I'm... I'm so sorry. I... - Oh, no, it's fine.
I actually just finished radiation, and I feel really good.
And my prognosis is excellent.
- Oh. - Yeah.
Well...
...you brave girl.
Yes. I'm very brave.
Anyway, retirement.
Congratulations.
What are you going to be doing with all your free time, Carol?
Well, anything I want, really.
The pension here is fit for a hobo.
But I bought Microsoft back when "Carol tried investing."
So I'm basically set for... ever!
Oh!
Oh, you know, I really must mingle.
Come on in and have a drink, okay?
- Yes, yes. - Yeah.
There they are.
- Hey! Good to see you, bud. - Hey, Johnny.
Johnny, how are you?
Hey, Kate. Mwah!
That dress. You look beautiful.
Thank you. And I know she told you to say that.
- No, I didn't. - Sorry, she scares the hell out of me.
- You're a smart man. - Hey.
- I've died and gone to heaven... - Oh!
...because I'm looking at the most heavenly creature.
- Mutt, it is so good to see you. - Great to see you.
Johnny, buddy, try and return my calls once in a while.
Oh, sorry, man. I've just been busy.
Tully, Dan the Sports Man. You guys come together?
- Indeed. - Yep.
Nice. I always said you two were meant to be.
- Oh no, we're not a couple. - Yeah. No.
Got it. Keep it out of the tabloids. Smart.
- Well... - Yeah.
- Should we get that drink? Let's go. - Yes.
- So what have you been up to? - Oh God, so much. Where to start?
Uh, still a cameraman. Still working here, 25 years.
And, uh...
Ah, I guess that's... that's pretty much it.
- Well, you look great though. - Good for you.
Thanks. Yeah, um, no complaints. I'm the luckiest guy I know.
And now to see into my future.
Will Coop and I get married?
"Outlook not so good."
"Ask again later."
You're wasting your time with Coop.
How're you gonna get married if he won't acknowledge you in public?
He acknowledges me.
Yeah, as his personal janitor at Burger Planet USA.
Not as his girlfriend.
- That's because I'm not his girlfriend. - Because you're too good for him.
You don't know what he's like when we're alone.
Well, in public, he's a jackass.
He's just not ready to tell people about us yet. And I'm okay with that.
We both really like each other, and it's romantic and amazing.
And we've already gone to second base.
Next time, I might even let him go to third.
Unlike you and your precious Sam, who aren't even in the game.
Should I go for it with Mr. Waverly?
"Most likely." See? The 8-ball agrees.
Gross. Tully, you can't be serious.
Why?
Because it's wrong.
How is it wrong?
I like him.
He inspires me.
And... And he's cute,
and sexy, and I can tell that he likes me too.
I don't care if he's my teacher.
Everybody knows Suzy Owens slept with Mr. Melrose last year,
and nothing bad happened.
Yeah, except for when she thought she was pregnant for the entire month of March.
Please. Everybody knows she was only doing that for the attention.
Tully, seriously, what are you gonna do? Like, bring Mr. Waverly to prom?
What, like you're bringing Coop to prom?
That was really mean.
Yeah. Well, you're being mean too.
- I'm trying to look out for you. - So am I!
Let's just...
let's just not talk about it anymore.
Works for me.
Excellent work today, Tully.
You were so connected and in the moment.
It really moved me. Well done.
Thanks, Mr. Waverly.
Coop, try not to hold back so much.
You're playing Romeo like he's cool, but he is not.
He is hopelessly romantic, and he's out of control.
Can't help it if I'm naturally cool.
Well, try.
And keep working on that balcony speech.
Can't I just write it on my hand?
Nope. Because you'll get on stage...
...you'll be nervous,
you'll sweat, it'll smear.
And then before you know it...
...it is the beast and Juliet is the suds?
- No one wants that. - I don't sweat, coach.
All right? Not when I play football, not when I'm in some dumb play.
You're human, Coop.
Don't waste time pretending not to sweat.
Embrace being uncool.
Write bad poetry.
Sing out loud, off-key, at the top of your lungs,
especially if it's a song that you're embarrassed to admit you like.
Be in the school play and just give it everything you have.
Don't be afraid to look like a fool.
To sweat is human.
To be young...
divine.
And it's all a gift you have to give back before you even know it.
So make the most of it all.
Right now.
All right, people, I've, uh, rambled on long enough.
You are dismissed.
Sorry, I can't hang out with you today, Tully.
I've got a shift at Burger Planet USA.
Uh, but luckily on Wednesdays it's super dead,
so I'll just be in the back room
by myself.
Doing nothing.
Okay, cool.
- Okay, bye. - Bye.
Hey.
I really liked what you said about the sweating...
...and not caring what other people think, and, you know, art and time
and... and how to make the most of it.
Thanks.
Yeah.
Um, do you mind staying late and running lines with me?
I'm having trouble with the first act, and I just really want to experience it
and do it justice, you know?
Honing your craft, I love it.
I'm in.
Great. Thanks, Sam.
God, we were so young and stupid back then.
This is like being on an acid trip.
It is so weird being back here.
Speaking of drugs, over there is where we made out on ecstasy.
Mmm, that was a good day.
And over there is where we had sex on top of the editing machine.
Shit, I did not realize how see-through those glass blocks are.
Do you think anyone saw us?
Nah, they were all on cocaine and adrenaline. It was the '80s.
Remember when we stayed late that night and had sex on my desk
and the janitor caught us?
We were kind of out of control with the office sex, weren't we?
Yeah. A little bit.
Ooh! And remember,
right there is where you impertinently and very boldly kissed me
whilst I was engaged to another man.
What are you talking about?
You don't remember kissing me when I was engaged to Theo?
I remember you shockingly and brazenly kissed me when you were engaged to Theo.
What?
Okay, that is insane. First of all, I would never do that.
Second, I remember like it was yesterday.
Yeah. So do I.
It was after the live broadcast. Tully had just said the f-word on air.
Yes. Yeah, I remember.
Theo and I had just set a date for the wedding.
Yes. That broke my heart.
And you were very upset because you had just lost your watch.
- Yes, I recall. - I was just trying to comfort you.
With your lips.
- No, no, you kissed me, buddy. - Yeah. I kissed you back.
I never would've kissed you first. You were engaged and there is a code.
Okay, this is ridiculous. You kissed me first.
- You... - Mutt. Quick word.
Okay. Who between the two of us
do you think would be more likely to throw her engagement down the toilet
for a stolen kiss in a smelly local newsroom?
You mean that night you guys were making out over there
after Tully dropped the f-bomb live?
- Yes. - Wait, how do you know that?
I remember that night.
- You'd just set a date with Nigel. - Theo.
And I was bummed because I was still carrying a torch.
And I was really bummed
because I saw you cheating on your man with him instead of me.
- Hmm. - Oh.
Anyway, place was mostly empty,
and I was doing a camera test after the broadcast,
and I kind of accidentally caught the whole thing on tape.
- Shit. - Wow.
I wasn't lingering or anything.
No, no, no, no. This is great. So... So tell us who kissed who.
Oh, I have no idea, but the tape is probably still in the archive.
- Huh. - Thank you.
I'm gonna find that tape,
and I'm gonna prove that you, sir, are the scoundrel.
You guys never change. I love it.
I am a scoundrel, but you kissed me, you minx.
Oh.
Who'd a thunk that the pain in my ass who sat at this desk
would go on to become the Tully Hart?
Me.
I'd a thunk it.
I knew exactly where I was headed all along.
Admit it. You knew it too.
You knew you were gonna be famous someday.
I had a lot of dreams.
Some came true.
Some did not.
Aw. Poor little rich boy...
...in his high-rise penthouse
with his dream job and gorgeous girlfriend.
Mmm.
What's with the face?
Nothing.
Celeste and I kind of had a big fight. That's why she didn't come today.
- I thought she had a thing. - Her thing was she's fucking pissed at me.
Why?
Because she's 34 and all her friends are getting married and having babies.
And she says that any woman over 35 who isn't married
is statistically more likely to be killed by terrorists.
No, no, no. That story is 20 years old and categorically untrue. Trust me.
It doesn't matter.
Celeste wants to get married. Soon.
That's intense.
She's ready, but I don't know if we're ready, you know?
I don't know if I'll ever be ready.
Mmm. Probably not. It's like me and Max.
Who's Max?
My ex-husband.
What?
You were married?
I did have a life between 1985 and your triumphant return to Seattle.
No, I know, I just never thought of you as the marrying kind.
Neither did I.
But I went for it anyway.
I let go of my fear, and I proposed to him.
Classic Tallulah Rose, you gotta be in charge.
Would you just listen?
I silenced the voices in my head that were telling me I wasn't ready,
and I dove in with both feet.
Right. You did say that he's your ex-husband.
Well, technically, not even that because we had it annulled.
I'm sorry. Am I supposed to follow this advice?
Okay, forget Max.
The point of the story is you don't have forever
to figure this shit out.
There is no perfect time for anything,
but you still have to make decisions anyway.
It's like Kate.
Her cancer was a wake-up call.
Tomorrow isn't promised.
You can lose everything in an instant.
So if you really care about Celeste, stop wasting time. Just go for it.
Ma'am...
Ma'am, I... I don't think it means you're never going to get married.
I will pass that along to the station manager.
Me? I'm 26.
Uh, actually, I'm engaged.
She said she hopes I get killed by a terrorist.
Yeah. Well, everyone wants to shoot the messenger.
What's going on?
Who's in the magazine?
Is it Jane Pauley,
AKA the woman who doesn't know the two of you are in a bitter rivalry?
It's no one.
Oh.
- Oh what? - I'm sorry.
What are you sorry for?
I know you miss him.
No, I don't.
- Well, I'm sure it sucks to get reminded. - It doesn't suck.
I get it.
I mean, you and Danny break up.
He moves to New York, gets famous,
and then you have to read about him in a magazine
on the same day that you report that depressing story.
The marriage thing?
No way, I am not Carol.
I'm young and successful. And I don't want to get married.
And I don't think about Dan the Sports Man, ever.
- I have some errands to run. - See you at home.
Hi.
Want to buy me a drink?
You have a drink.
How about now?
- Here for that pharmaceutical conference? - Yes.
So your company pays for this whole thing?
Yup.
So you, um... you said you're from Pittsburgh.
I hear it's beaut...
Sorry.
For what?
I, um...
I can't do this.
I'm still in love with my ex.
That's totally cool.
We don't have to fall in love.
I, uh... I thought coming up here might make me feel better, but it didn't.
It just...
...made me feel like I'm cheating on her.
Which is... stupid.
I know that, but, um...
Thank you, though.
It's really beautiful, Jimmy.
Johnny.
See, it's also annoying.
Because I just want to get laid.
Yeah. Understood.
Now I have to go to the bar
and start all over again.
Pfft. Yeah, that's a bummer. Look, I... I really am sorry.
Um, I feel terrible.
Whatever.
Fucking Brits.
Oh, it's almost midnight. Have you been shopping this whole time?
No, I was working.
First, I went shopping. I got you a present, by the way.
Uh, here it is.
Aw, an engagement present.
Sort of. It's for you and Theo, but, really, it's for us
for when you're married and I come over for movie nights.
I love it.
I also got this blouse, these earrings.
- Oh, fancy. - And four pairs of shoes.
This is a lot.
Haven't you ever heard of retail therapy?
So you are depressed.
No, I was mad at Carol about that dumb story.
And I maybe, kind of, sort of, miss Danny a little.
So, you know what I did?
Spent an obscene amount of money on shoes?
These are fabulous, by the way.
Yes. But then I went back to the office and started researching.
And...
...Carol may be right.
That study might be bullshit.
Carol was right, and Harvard was wrong?
I think the press, including us, just sort of jumped on it
because it was such a juicy headline.
- Wow, nice work, Tully Hart. - Thanks.
Now I just have to convince Stan to let me issue a retraction.
This is seriously impressive.
You took a tough criticism, and you turned it into hard work.
You're like the best reporter I know. You're better than Jane Pauley.
Mmm.
Nice try.
You can't have the shoes.
Oh.
There you go, sir.
A dollar twenty for a burger, fries, and coke?
Uh, inflation's out of control.
Hey, okay. Can you watch this for a sec?
I gotta go do something, uh, in the back.
Okay.
Kate Mularkey, you drive me crazy.
And you're the foxiest, sexiest girl.
Uh...
I believe you.
What do you mean?
I believe you really think that.
Duh, of course I do.
So then, how come when you were in here the other day,
you acted like I didn't exist?
I acted like you existed.
You handed me a soggy napkin.
I helped you clean up.
I know you like me, Coop.
Just...
Why don't you want other people to know that you like me?
It's more like...
There's all this pressure on me every second, every day.
I'm captain of the football team. I'm goddamn Romeo in the school play.
Everyone's on my ass all the time.
"Coop, pass the ball. Coop, learn your lines."
"Your grades are slipping because you're passing the ball and learning your lines."
My dad, my friends, my coach,
in my face, judging me.
But then...
I get to be with you.
And when it's just us,
and no one else's stupid opinion matters...
I can be me.
And I'm so happy.
For once.
Oh.
I wish... you could understand
how bad I want to scream your name from the roof of Burger Planet USA.
I'm not hiding you, Kate.
I'm protecting us.
From them
and all their bullshit.
You...
deserve to be protected.
I... I just need some... lard.
- I was just looking for the bathroom. - Oh, uh, yeah. It's down the hall.
- Down the hall. Right. Sorry to barge in. - No, it's all good.
It's not what it looks like.
You're not having a secret affair with the hottest guy in school?
I'm sure you wanna get your revenge on me, or whatever, by blabbing to everyone
and ruining the best thing that's ever happened to me.
So, whatever.
Go ahead.
I don't care.
What?
I wouldn't...
Kate, come on.
I can keep a secret.
And then he kissed me and it was like...
It was like falling backwards into a warm pool of... of liquid happiness.
- Wow. French? - Oui.
- He touch your boobs? - Oh yeah. So good.
Have you touched his...
Uh, no. Not yet.
Uh, but I, like, felt it on my thigh, and it was like, whoa.
That is so romantic.
When we're together, it's like I'm transported to this place
that's beyond time.
It's...
It's timeless.
Is he taking you to prom?
It's not for another month and a half. I mean, it's still a long ways away.
I mean, we'll probably go together, like in a group or something.
Or, I don't know. I honestly haven't even really thought about it that much yet.
It's... I just still can't believe he's giving me the time of day.
Why? You're one of the coolest people in the entire school.
Thanks.
Uh...
We haven't hung out in a while.
Still like to play Risk?
Is Madagascar impossible to defend from the north?
Well, maybe we could play next week.
If you can get a boy like Coop,
maybe I can get a date to the dance too.
I don't see why not. You've got all the time in the world.
It all just goes so fast.
Thirty years in one place over in a blink of an eye.
Hmm. It's crazy how that happens.
I feel like last week I was 21.
Yesterday, I was 30.
This morning I woke up and I'm...
The same age I was when you started here.
Shit. Is that true?
Bet you thought I was really old then.
Nah.
Kind of.
- Guess that makes me old now. - Hmm.
Not as old as me.
You still got it though. How come you're hanging it up?
It was time.
I'd already tried everything else.
So what's next?
Traveling, seeing the world.
Maybe I'll even make it to Antarctica
and check out those emperor penguins from your documentary.
You actually watched that.
I ran out of Ambien.
Wow, it's nice to know that our impending climate catastrophe makes you sleepy.
The destruction of our planet keeps me up at night.
But watching you hide your talents, that's a bore.
How is that hiding my talents?
It was one of the most meaningful things I've ever done.
And all five of the people who saw it thank you.
But, Tully, you belong in front of a much bigger audience.
Like your old show.
So instead of reporting on the biggest story of our time,
I should stick to dating tips.
The Girlfriend Hour told women that what they care about matters,
their interior lives matter,
they matter.
But you always thought you were above that.
What the fuck does that mean? I did that show for years.
And some part of you always felt like you were above it.
Same way you felt about me when you worked here.
- I never felt like I was... - Bullshit.
You thought I was a joke.
But I don't care.
I wedged open the door that you kicked down.
I'm proud of that,
and I'm proud of you and everything you've done,
not just the serious journalism.
You know, someday, hopefully,
you'll feel that way too.
This is how you spend a party?
You're a strange bird, Mularkey.
Johnny gave up looking, but I am not going to.
Looking for what?
Remember when you said "fuck" on air? That was February, right? '86?
March.
Gee, don't remind me. I almost got fired. Jeez!
Between you and Carol, everyone's just piling it on.
What are you talking about?
Carol thinks I'm wasting my talent.
Like I care about hosting another stupid talk show.
Whatever, Carol. You don't know me.
Oh my God, you totally think she's right.
Please.
I mean...
sure, I miss it.
And yeah, I'd like to find a way to cover more important stories
while still maintaining a large national platform.
Plus, I actually do like the fluff sometimes.
I mean, who doesn't love a good makeover once in a while?
It's fun and uplifting and... Shit.
Carol is right.
Now I'll have to start hosting my own talk show again.
Tul, that is so great. I am super happy for you.
Now, could you help me find this tape so we can prove Johnny kissed me first,
and I can rub it in his face.
I already looked for it, obviously.
Yeah, it is your responsibility.
It's a silver watch.
Silver and gold with Roman numerals on the face.
Can you... Can you, like, check under the bed or...
Yes, I believe that the maid would've turned it in. I'm just asking.
Okay, great. Well, you've got my number.
Thank you.
Fuck!
- Is everything okay? - Yeah, I just... I just lost my watch.
Oh, you can always get a new one. Ooh! You could get a Swatch.
Yeah, maybe.
Fuck.
Okay, thank you.
I just got the proof. That study? Totally flawed.
And the way we've been reporting it?
Completely misleading.
So, Carol was right.
Sure, yeah.
If you want to put that fine a point on it, Carol was right.
Ooh, so do you think Stan's gonna let you issue a retraction?
You ever hear the saying, "It's better to ask forgiveness than permission"?
The Coast Guard has recovered the ferry
and, thankfully, no injuries were reported.
An investigation into the cause is underway.
And now, I'd like to issue a retraction
and a formal apology to all my female viewers,
including the women I work with.
On Friday, I reported a story to you
without providing context or asking the important follow-up questions.
Afterwards, a colleague called me on it.
Which inspired me to keep digging.
Through that digging, I discovered that the widely reported story
about single women over the age of 35
being more likely to die in a terrorist attack than get married
is slanted and misleading.
Not to mention sexist, misogynistic,
and irresponsible.
You know me,
and you trust me to bring you the truth.
This time I didn't.
The phrase "more likely to die in a terrorist attack,"
is not even in the original study.
The press just latched onto it.
And here we are.
I'd like to remind all the women watching from home of any age,
don't let a grabby headline and an ignorant anchorwoman
try to tell you what your future holds.
The modern woman's future is in her hands.
One dumb study taken out of context
can't tell you who you are or stop you from doing whatever the fuck you want.
This has been Tully Hart for KPOC News.
- I gotta say, I was a badass. - Mmm.
I should re-play that on the first episode of my new talk show.
Speaking of which, Johnny, how do you feel about getting back into producing?
Okay, can we pause the contract negotiations
and get to the part where we see I was right and Johnny owes me 20 bucks?
- It's coming. It's coming. - You wish.
Techta Flex 2000 camera test, March 9th, 1986.
See, we'd just gotten this new camera, so I stayed late to do a test.
I thought I was alone in the office.
Then...
- Oh my God. Look at us! - Oh my God.
- Look at my sweater. It is fabulous! - Look at my hair. It's terrible.
- Yeah, it is. - Yeah.
Oh, and here comes the part where you kiss me.
Yeah, better take this
to wipe the egg off your face.
What! Dude, what the hell?
- No, no, no, no. - Don't worry. It's coming back.
I definitely saw you guys going at it.
Oh shit.
- Oh! Wait, you didn't get it? - Are you serious? Come on!
- I'm sorry, babe. - Oh no!
Guess we're just never gonna know for sure. Mmm.
Oh, we know for sure. I know for sure you kissed me.
And... I was so confused,
and excited, and scared.
God, it was awful being that young.
Feeling like you're on the precipice of your entire existence,
and one wrong move, take the wrong job, or marry the wrong person,
and you just... end up in the wrong life.
Well, good thing we ended up in the right one.
God, I would not want to be 26 again.
- Pfft. Me neither. - Oh no.
- Except for maybe the skin. - Mmm.
And my hair. And my boobs.
My joints.
Right? My knees, they've got these pangs in them.
- Yeah, I get the lower back stuff. - Yeah.
I tweaked my back the other week trying to open a jar of pickles.
Oh, it's the worst.
- Who wants a drink? - Yeah.
- Yes. - Okay.
I'll take one.
How'd it go with Stan?
He's pissed.
There is a big meeting tomorrow.
Tully and I have to drive to Tacoma so that he can yell at us in person.
He's not going to fire you, though, right?
Are you okay?
No.
Don't worry about Stan.
I think, if anything, this will be good for the ratings.
I lost my watch.
The one that you got me for my birthday.
And, um, I feel awful.
I really fucked up.
Come on, Johnny.
Hey, don't worry about it.
Some guy was just selling them out of a suitcase. It wasn't real.
I mean, there is no such brand as Growlex.
Oh, that's not...
It was just, you know, that was... that was the last piece of you
that I had of our relationship.
And... And now it's gone forever
because I lost it.
And you're going to get married on May 10th, and I was...
Oh shit.
Oh my God. I am so sorry.
- No, I'm sorry. - I'm so sorry.
- Uh... - I shouldn't have done that.
It's fine.
I, uh... I think maybe that I just felt like we needed like a... goodbye kiss. You know?
Yeah.
Yeah, that's... Exactly.
And, uh...
Bye.
Yep. Bye.
O, then, dear saint, let lips do what hands do.
They pray, grant thou, lest faith turn to despair.
Saints do not move, though grant for prayers' sake.
Then move not while my prayer's effect I take.
My sin is purged.
Okay. Well, uh, I think you get it.
And, uh, I will see you tomorrow.
Oh, Sam, um, I was actually wondering...
I already know what you're going to ask, and...
the answer is no.
Not now, not ever.
- Trust me, you don't really want that. - Yes, I do.
It is normal for students to look up to their teachers,
and sometimes those feelings can get confused with something else.
Look, I know you think people won't approve, but nobody has to know.
Life is short.
True connections are rare, and we have a true connection.
No. I am not your Romeo, Tully.
I'm an adult, you're a kid.
No, I'm a woman, Sam.
I know it must feel that way,
but that's not how I see you.
Right. Um...
Yeah, this was stupid. Sorry.
- I'm sorry. - No, I just, um... I have... I have to go.
Hey.
You okay, Tul?
I read lines with Mr. Waverly.
How'd it go?
He doesn't want me.
He thinks I'm a child. He basically laughed in my face.
It's just not the right time.
Will anyone ever want me?
- I can't believe Carol is really retiring. - Mmm.
Does that make us old?
No.
Just makes us
not young.
Mmm.
They say you can never go home again, but that felt pretty close.
Home?
Sports Man, you worked at KPOC for, like, five minutes.
Hell of a five minutes, though.
I should... call Justine.
Let her know I'm ready to dive back into network television.
Your fans need you.
They do.
I...
Thank you.
Good night, Tallulah.
Goodnight, Sports Man.
- Good morning. - Mmm!
Well, you're in a good mood.
That was fun last night.
That blast from the past made me appreciate being right here,
right now,
exactly where I'm meant to be.
Me too.
It was fun seeing everyone.
Yeah, and, you know, tape or no tape, I mean, we both know... you kissed me.
How exactly do we both know that?
Well, think about it. I was engaged.
- You know what a goody two-shoes I am. - Oh, I know you like people to think that.
I mean, yeah. I was still in love with you.
But I wouldn't have done that to Theo.
I wouldn't have crossed that line.
I know it. I'm sure of it.
You're right.
I couldn't keep my hands off you then.
I can't keep my hands off you now.
And just so we're clear,
that was me kissing you first.
Hello.
Hey, Tul.
- You coming over for brunch? - Yeah. If I can get my ass in gear.
I didn't sleep last night.
Why, what's wrong?
I think...
I think I am in love with Dan the Sports Man.
You think?
I do not know why you still haven't told him how you feel.
He's got a girlfriend.
So? They're not married.
Yeah, but it's still kind of wrong, isn't it?
Maybe.
But if Johnny hadn't kissed me, I might be married to Theo,
and that would've been wrong.
I just don't know if the timing is right.
Take it from me, there's no time like the present.
There's no time but the present.
Yeah, that's the speech I gave Danny last night,
trying to convince him to propose to Celeste.
Wait, you had to convince him? Tul, what are you waiting for?
Danny...
...I know this is kind of insane for me to be saying right now, but...
Danny...
I know it's kind of insane for me to be saying this right now, but...
Let's face it,
it has always been you and me.
It's always been you and me.
♪ Came back only yesterday ♪
♪ I'm moving farther away ♪
♪ Want you near me... ♪
That's not how it works. That's too much pressure.
- Hey, guys. - Hey, Tul.
Oh my God, Tully. Guess what?
Danny proposed.
We just went out and bought the ring. Isn't it gorgeous?
Wow.
Yeah, that's incredible.
Danny told me your pep talk lit a fire under his ass.
Thank you so much.
Yeah, you told me not to waste my time. You were right.
Come inside for some champagne to celebrate.
Ugh, I... I can't. Bad timing.
I'm late for brunch with Kate,
but I'll check back in with you guys later.
And congratulations to you both. I'm so happy for you.
Thanks.
♪ All I needed was the love you gave ♪
♪ All I needed for another day ♪
♪ And all I ever knew ♪
♪ Only you ♪