1
00:00:01,251 --> 00:00:03,519
I love college.
I wish I could
2
00:00:03,586 --> 00:00:05,754
take my tuition
and shove it down
that girl's underwear
3
00:00:05,821 --> 00:00:07,389
in $1.00 bills.
4
00:00:07,457 --> 00:00:08,723
Whatever.
5
00:00:08,791 --> 00:00:11,726
Don't start with that lizzie
depression crap, man.
6
00:00:11,794 --> 00:00:14,029
I'm sick of hearing it.
It's annoying, ok?
7
00:00:14,096 --> 00:00:16,698
Look, life sucks
if I can't have her.
Simple as that.
8
00:00:16,766 --> 00:00:19,901
No, it's as simple
as that behind, ok?
9
00:00:19,969 --> 00:00:21,403
'Cause as long
as that's around,
10
00:00:21,470 --> 00:00:23,038
then life can really
never be that bad.
11
00:00:23,105 --> 00:00:25,040
Bye.
12
00:00:25,108 --> 00:00:27,026
Oh, let's walk her
to class. Come on.
13
00:00:27,093 --> 00:00:29,028
I love this part.
14
00:00:30,196 --> 00:00:32,731
Heh. Hey, sheila.
What's going on?
15
00:00:32,799 --> 00:00:34,766
Oh, I'm just taking
some stuff for my room.
16
00:00:34,834 --> 00:00:36,534
I'm moving out of the suite.
17
00:00:36,602 --> 00:00:37,953
No way.
18
00:00:38,020 --> 00:00:38,954
That's so sad.
19
00:00:39,021 --> 00:00:40,806
I've never
even seen her before.
20
00:00:40,874 --> 00:00:41,890
I have.
21
00:00:41,958 --> 00:00:44,610
Well, I guess
that's everything.
22
00:00:44,677 --> 00:00:46,378
Bye.
Bye.
23
00:00:46,445 --> 00:00:48,346
Bye.
24
00:00:48,414 --> 00:00:50,148
Let's go check out her room.
25
00:00:50,216 --> 00:00:51,082
Ok.
26
00:00:52,953 --> 00:00:56,121
You guys, we could, like,
totally deck this place out.
27
00:00:56,189 --> 00:00:58,357
Yeah, yeah.
We could, like,
paint the walls red
28
00:00:58,424 --> 00:01:00,158
and throw some pillows
on the floor.
29
00:01:00,226 --> 00:01:02,761
We'll call it
the poochie palace.
30
00:01:02,963 --> 00:01:04,546
Poochie party palace, huh?
31
00:01:04,614 --> 00:01:06,782
We should throw a party here
this weekend.
32
00:01:06,849 --> 00:01:08,484
That sounds like a lot of work,
33
00:01:08,551 --> 00:01:11,453
and I have a double bio lab
on thursday.
34
00:01:11,788 --> 00:01:13,472
Yeah, and I can't
miss scene rehearsal.
35
00:01:13,540 --> 00:01:15,273
I'm the star of my class.
36
00:01:15,341 --> 00:01:16,691
No, no. That's ok.
That's all right.
37
00:01:16,759 --> 00:01:18,660
Because we can do it,
you know, together.
38
00:01:18,727 --> 00:01:22,064
The marsh-man.
The rachenator.
39
00:01:22,132 --> 00:01:23,432
Ha ha.
Ha ha.
40
00:01:23,500 --> 00:01:25,768
We could make some magic
in here.
41
00:01:25,835 --> 00:01:27,135
Yeah.
42
00:01:43,853 --> 00:01:45,938
[Telephone rings]
43
00:01:46,006 --> 00:01:48,673
Hello?
44
00:01:48,741 --> 00:01:50,742
Dial tone.
45
00:01:50,810 --> 00:01:53,445
Well, that's weird.
Probably lizzie's.
46
00:01:53,513 --> 00:01:54,613
[Telephone rings]
47
00:01:55,732 --> 00:01:56,665
Ah.
48
00:01:56,733 --> 00:01:59,033
[Ring]
49
00:02:00,236 --> 00:02:01,403
Hi, eric.
50
00:02:01,471 --> 00:02:02,738
Eric: Who the hell is this?
51
00:02:02,805 --> 00:02:03,939
Why are you
answering lizzie's phone?
52
00:02:04,006 --> 00:02:06,442
She left it in our room.
It's ron. Hey.
53
00:02:06,509 --> 00:02:08,577
Well, what the hell
was lizzie doing in your room?
54
00:02:08,645 --> 00:02:11,813
Uh, we were
making sloppy love, eric.
55
00:02:11,881 --> 00:02:12,814
It was heavenly.
56
00:02:12,882 --> 00:02:14,967
What?
Give the phone to lizzie!
57
00:02:15,034 --> 00:02:15,951
Did I hear my phone ring?
58
00:02:16,018 --> 00:02:17,052
Yeah, it's eric.
59
00:02:17,120 --> 00:02:18,087
Eric: Give lizzie the phone!
60
00:02:18,154 --> 00:02:19,854
You shut up!
You shut up!
61
00:02:19,922 --> 00:02:23,024
Give lizzie the phone!
You shut up!
62
00:02:23,092 --> 00:02:24,393
Hey, baby.
63
00:02:24,460 --> 00:02:26,628
Well, I guess you
weren't in the library studying,
64
00:02:26,696 --> 00:02:28,313
were you, baby?
65
00:02:28,381 --> 00:02:31,616
No. We're, um,
making a home office.
66
00:02:31,685 --> 00:02:33,218
Eric: Oh, right.
67
00:02:33,286 --> 00:02:34,787
Why are you always
checking up on me?
68
00:02:36,923 --> 00:02:38,123
I hate that guy.
69
00:02:38,191 --> 00:02:40,709
Whatever.
He's a nice guy, you know.
70
00:02:40,777 --> 00:02:42,778
He's not a nice guy.
You are a nice guy
71
00:02:42,845 --> 00:02:44,980
for calling that idiot
a nice guy.
72
00:02:48,101 --> 00:02:49,334
Tell you what, man.
73
00:02:49,401 --> 00:02:51,336
You want lizzie?
74
00:02:51,403 --> 00:02:53,605
I can get that done for you.
75
00:02:53,673 --> 00:02:55,006
I'm gonna put this together.
76
00:02:55,074 --> 00:02:56,908
No, ron, please don't.
77
00:02:56,976 --> 00:02:59,277
You're gonna humiliate me,
and I don't want that.
78
00:02:59,345 --> 00:03:00,795
No, I'm gonna bring you joy.
79
00:03:00,863 --> 00:03:01,930
So I'll tell you what,
80
00:03:01,997 --> 00:03:04,132
you go wash your boxers
and whatever they hold.
81
00:03:04,200 --> 00:03:05,984
'Cause when I'm done
working lizzie,
82
00:03:06,052 --> 00:03:08,353
you're gonna need
those bad boys clean.
83
00:03:15,177 --> 00:03:17,946
Hey, man, you ok?
84
00:03:18,013 --> 00:03:20,349
Oh. Yeah.
85
00:03:20,416 --> 00:03:22,150
I'll survive.
86
00:03:22,252 --> 00:03:23,685
Mind if I sit down?
87
00:03:23,753 --> 00:03:26,188
Uh...No. Go ahead.
88
00:03:26,255 --> 00:03:29,491
Thanks. It's a woman,
isn't it?
89
00:03:29,559 --> 00:03:32,210
Oh, uh...
90
00:03:32,278 --> 00:03:33,879
Yeah, it is.
91
00:03:33,947 --> 00:03:37,499
Ain't it always?
She look good?
I bet she look good.
92
00:03:37,566 --> 00:03:40,535
She's beautiful.
93
00:03:40,603 --> 00:03:42,737
If you want, I could
set you up with
somebody, man.
94
00:03:42,805 --> 00:03:44,773
Yeah. Matter of fact,
95
00:03:44,841 --> 00:03:46,791
I know somebody you might like.
96
00:03:46,859 --> 00:03:47,776
Really?
97
00:03:47,844 --> 00:03:48,844
I'm telling you.
98
00:03:48,912 --> 00:03:52,063
He'll fulfill your every need.
99
00:03:52,131 --> 00:03:53,164
He?
100
00:03:54,517 --> 00:03:57,802
Hey, thank you,
but I'm sorry...
101
00:03:57,871 --> 00:03:59,537
I'm not gay.
102
00:03:59,605 --> 00:04:02,307
That's ok, man.
Neither is he.
103
00:04:02,375 --> 00:04:04,343
You see, his name is jesus.
104
00:04:05,478 --> 00:04:06,912
Christ.
105
00:04:07,113 --> 00:04:09,297
Yeah. I see
you know his name.
106
00:04:09,365 --> 00:04:11,950
Say it again.
Wear it out.
107
00:04:16,722 --> 00:04:21,159
So, existentialists
believe that the universe
is meaningless
108
00:04:21,227 --> 00:04:23,829
and that human existence
has no purpose,
109
00:04:23,896 --> 00:04:25,713
that everything
we believe to be true,
110
00:04:25,781 --> 00:04:28,600
our religions, our laws,
our relationships
111
00:04:28,668 --> 00:04:31,169
are only illusions we invent
112
00:04:31,237 --> 00:04:35,573
to distract us
from our purposeless
and empty lives.
113
00:04:35,641 --> 00:04:38,159
And let's face it...
if there's no meaning,
why even bother trying?
114
00:04:38,227 --> 00:04:40,129
May as well give up!
There are no laws.
115
00:04:40,196 --> 00:04:42,097
We can do whatever we want
whenever we want.
116
00:04:42,232 --> 00:04:43,882
Of course it's depressing!
117
00:04:43,950 --> 00:04:46,685
The universe is a miserable,
horrible place.
118
00:04:46,753 --> 00:04:49,387
Show me meaningless!
Show me pointless!
119
00:04:49,455 --> 00:04:52,006
You are nothing.
Life is meaningless.
120
00:04:52,074 --> 00:04:55,744
We are all completely alone.
121
00:04:57,830 --> 00:05:00,198
Ok, I'm sorry I've cut
into your lunch a bit.
122
00:05:00,266 --> 00:05:02,267
I'll make it up to you
next time.
123
00:05:02,335 --> 00:05:05,003
Hey, cheer up...
it's taco tuesday.
124
00:05:07,156 --> 00:05:09,874
I know you're lonely.
But it's not about
a girl.
125
00:05:09,942 --> 00:05:11,543
It's not a girl
that you're missing.
126
00:05:11,611 --> 00:05:13,011
It's god that you're missing.
127
00:05:13,213 --> 00:05:15,030
The word is strong right now.
128
00:05:15,097 --> 00:05:18,467
You know who's a strong
believer of the word?
Charlie sheen. Mm-hmm.
129
00:05:18,534 --> 00:05:21,570
Chris tucker.
They are very strong
believers in the word.
130
00:05:21,637 --> 00:05:25,790
[Loudly] Do you understand
the words that are coming
out of my mouth?
131
00:05:25,858 --> 00:05:28,476
[Laughs] That's
an impression I do.
132
00:05:28,544 --> 00:05:29,660
[Both laugh]
133
00:05:29,728 --> 00:05:30,979
But do you really...
134
00:05:31,046 --> 00:05:33,615
Understand the words
that are coming
out of my mouth?
135
00:05:33,683 --> 00:05:36,084
Yeah, I do. But...
136
00:05:36,152 --> 00:05:40,055
Like I'm just not
really into religion,
you know?
137
00:05:40,122 --> 00:05:42,590
And how are you feeling today?
138
00:05:51,600 --> 00:05:54,569
Hey. Saturday night.
139
00:05:54,636 --> 00:05:57,572
Totally throwing it down
at the poochie party palace.
140
00:05:57,907 --> 00:06:00,408
Did you ever think
that maybe the entire way
you looked at the world
141
00:06:00,476 --> 00:06:01,843
was wrong?
142
00:06:01,910 --> 00:06:04,079
Oh, yeah, man.
I used to be a goth guy.
143
00:06:04,146 --> 00:06:07,082
I met this chick,
she had, like, black
fingernails,
144
00:06:07,149 --> 00:06:09,117
totally, like, pale.
145
00:06:09,185 --> 00:06:11,687
So hot, right?
Turned out to be
albino.
146
00:06:11,754 --> 00:06:14,356
Anyway, do you guys
wanna get a keg?
147
00:06:14,423 --> 00:06:17,159
I don't know anything anymore.
148
00:06:17,226 --> 00:06:18,327
That's ok. I'll figure it out.
149
00:06:20,963 --> 00:06:24,666
[Playing classical piece]
150
00:06:39,698 --> 00:06:40,965
How was that?
151
00:06:41,033 --> 00:06:43,802
It was perfect.
Every note was flawless.
152
00:06:44,103 --> 00:06:46,187
It was flat.
I can do better.
153
00:06:46,255 --> 00:06:48,723
Susuki, you have played
the same song
154
00:06:48,791 --> 00:06:50,192
5 times in a row,
155
00:06:50,259 --> 00:06:52,527
and the song
is 47 minutes long.
156
00:06:52,594 --> 00:06:54,646
Pinchas zukerman plays
until his fingers are bloody.
157
00:06:54,714 --> 00:06:58,083
Then maybe you should
ask pinker zuckerman
to room with you,
158
00:06:58,151 --> 00:06:59,151
'cause I have homework to do.
159
00:06:59,218 --> 00:07:01,486
Yeah, well,
this is my homework.
160
00:07:12,648 --> 00:07:16,251
This place is the best.
161
00:07:16,318 --> 00:07:18,419
[Sighs] I know.
162
00:07:18,487 --> 00:07:20,055
I could live in here.
163
00:07:20,122 --> 00:07:21,522
It's so soothing.
164
00:07:21,590 --> 00:07:24,259
It's like all the pressure
melts away when I'm in here.
165
00:07:24,327 --> 00:07:25,493
Me, too.
166
00:07:25,561 --> 00:07:29,163
It's like nobody
wants anything from me
167
00:07:29,231 --> 00:07:31,566
and I don't need anything.
168
00:07:31,634 --> 00:07:36,338
Exactly.
I don't want anything.
169
00:07:36,405 --> 00:07:37,572
[Sighs]
170
00:07:37,640 --> 00:07:39,808
Our party's gonna be
so awesome.
171
00:07:39,876 --> 00:07:40,993
[Knocking on door]
172
00:07:41,060 --> 00:07:42,911
Hello?
173
00:07:43,379 --> 00:07:44,112
Hey, guys.
174
00:07:44,180 --> 00:07:45,263
Hey.
175
00:07:45,331 --> 00:07:47,282
Sheila told me
she was moving out.
176
00:07:47,350 --> 00:07:48,683
Uh-huh. She did.
177
00:07:48,751 --> 00:07:50,819
So you know what's going on
with the empty room?
178
00:07:52,855 --> 00:07:54,155
Oh, I think they filled it.
179
00:07:54,223 --> 00:07:56,324
Oh, that's a shame.
180
00:07:56,526 --> 00:07:59,194
Yeah.
It's off the market.
181
00:08:01,413 --> 00:08:02,848
This is not good.
182
00:08:02,915 --> 00:08:04,883
She put in an application.
183
00:08:04,951 --> 00:08:07,318
Yeah, I know.
This is gonna kill
our killer party.
184
00:08:07,386 --> 00:08:08,854
Maybe we should just
give her the room.
185
00:08:08,921 --> 00:08:11,322
No, no, no, no, no.
She has a room, ok?
186
00:08:11,390 --> 00:08:13,391
She's not homeless,
she's selfish.
187
00:08:13,459 --> 00:08:15,610
She just
wants a better room, ok?
188
00:08:15,678 --> 00:08:17,745
I can make this application
disappear, ok?
189
00:08:17,813 --> 00:08:19,164
I got connections
in the housing office, ok?
190
00:08:19,232 --> 00:08:20,431
So, you know...
191
00:08:20,499 --> 00:08:21,867
[Breathes out] Deep breaths.
192
00:08:21,934 --> 00:08:24,419
[Breathes deeply] Ahh.
193
00:08:24,487 --> 00:08:27,239
Mm-mm-mm.
194
00:08:29,608 --> 00:08:32,377
Aw, that's so cute,
eric and the dog.
195
00:08:32,445 --> 00:08:34,780
I mean, he just,
he seems like
the greatest guy.
196
00:08:34,847 --> 00:08:35,981
He is.
197
00:08:38,084 --> 00:08:39,151
So you're gonna marry him?
198
00:08:39,218 --> 00:08:42,187
That's really cool.
I respect that, I think.
199
00:08:42,255 --> 00:08:44,422
I don't know.
I didn't say that. Heh.
200
00:08:44,490 --> 00:08:47,825
He must make some sweet money
201
00:08:47,893 --> 00:08:49,627
owning that copy shop,
though, huh?
202
00:08:49,695 --> 00:08:52,730
Well, actually,
he just manages it.
203
00:08:52,798 --> 00:08:54,950
He doesn't make that much.
204
00:08:55,017 --> 00:08:57,552
He lives with his ex-step dad.
205
00:08:57,619 --> 00:09:02,090
Oh. That's cool.
206
00:09:02,158 --> 00:09:06,627
Eric's great, but...
207
00:09:06,696 --> 00:09:11,166
I sort of had this
weird thing with steven.
208
00:09:12,901 --> 00:09:14,202
Steven steven?
209
00:09:14,269 --> 00:09:15,203
Yeah. Heh.
210
00:09:15,270 --> 00:09:16,771
What happened?
211
00:09:16,839 --> 00:09:19,774
Did you guys, like,
make out or something
like that?
212
00:09:22,210 --> 00:09:23,244
More than that.
213
00:09:23,312 --> 00:09:25,563
More?
214
00:09:25,631 --> 00:09:26,564
Ha ha.
215
00:09:26,632 --> 00:09:29,067
Holy moly! More!
216
00:09:29,135 --> 00:09:32,420
I mean, I don't want
to cross any lines here
with you, lizzie,
217
00:09:32,488 --> 00:09:35,323
but I've personally
always been of the thought
218
00:09:35,391 --> 00:09:38,192
that you and steve
would seriously make,
219
00:09:38,261 --> 00:09:40,295
like, the cutest couple.
220
00:09:40,363 --> 00:09:41,496
Really?
221
00:10:03,852 --> 00:10:05,553
Have you ever read the bible?
222
00:10:05,621 --> 00:10:07,422
It's awesome.
223
00:10:07,490 --> 00:10:09,340
Very moral.
224
00:10:09,408 --> 00:10:12,911
It's kind of like
8 star wars episodes
in a row.
225
00:10:12,979 --> 00:10:17,616
Steve, the bible's
just a bunch of stories
made up by rich people
226
00:10:17,683 --> 00:10:20,384
to stop poor people
hitting them on the head
with a stick
227
00:10:20,452 --> 00:10:21,486
and taking their money.
228
00:10:21,554 --> 00:10:22,720
That's terrible.
229
00:10:22,788 --> 00:10:26,391
I agree.
It's a catastrophe.
230
00:10:26,459 --> 00:10:28,160
I mean, how can you say that?
231
00:10:28,227 --> 00:10:30,529
Who do you think
created everything?
232
00:10:30,596 --> 00:10:32,764
Is it a coincidence that
music sounds pretty?
233
00:10:32,831 --> 00:10:34,615
That water turns into rain?
234
00:10:34,683 --> 00:10:35,834
That our butts are down here
235
00:10:35,902 --> 00:10:37,969
and not on the top of our head?
236
00:10:38,037 --> 00:10:40,204
God's work is everywhere.
237
00:10:40,272 --> 00:10:44,258
God doesn't exist, ok?
Nothing matters.
238
00:10:44,326 --> 00:10:46,928
You may as well
just do whatever you want
whenever you want.
239
00:10:46,996 --> 00:10:48,046
That's selfish.
240
00:10:48,114 --> 00:10:49,981
Love thy neighbor as thyself.
241
00:10:50,049 --> 00:10:52,417
Yeah. You're right.
242
00:10:52,618 --> 00:10:54,752
You are right, and I will start
243
00:10:54,820 --> 00:10:56,988
by nailing that little
sophomore hottie
244
00:10:57,056 --> 00:10:58,489
at the party tonight.
245
00:10:58,557 --> 00:11:01,893
Now I don't think
that's what it means.
Do you?
246
00:11:02,095 --> 00:11:05,297
Tomahto, tomato.
247
00:11:08,951 --> 00:11:10,285
All we're asking is for you
248
00:11:10,353 --> 00:11:12,487
to make tina's
application disappear.
249
00:11:12,554 --> 00:11:14,172
No way.
We'd lose our jobs.
250
00:11:14,239 --> 00:11:16,475
[Sighs]
251
00:11:16,542 --> 00:11:20,178
Sam-o, this is
a compilation reel
252
00:11:20,245 --> 00:11:22,480
of over 250 nude scenes
253
00:11:22,548 --> 00:11:24,582
that I've taped off
cable since I was 8.
254
00:11:26,702 --> 00:11:27,618
Who's in it?
255
00:11:27,686 --> 00:11:28,619
Name a celebrity.
256
00:11:28,687 --> 00:11:30,087
Holly hunter.
257
00:11:33,342 --> 00:11:35,676
Man, we got katie holmes, ok?
258
00:11:35,744 --> 00:11:39,614
Ashley judd,
eye of the beholder.
259
00:11:39,681 --> 00:11:41,649
Got richard gere a few times
if that's your thing.
260
00:11:41,717 --> 00:11:45,269
I got jamie lee curtis,
trading places.
261
00:11:45,338 --> 00:11:47,472
Must've been cold that day,
know what I'm sayin'?
262
00:11:47,540 --> 00:11:48,873
Both: Ha ha ha.
263
00:11:49,308 --> 00:11:50,825
Do you have any alyssa milano?
264
00:11:50,893 --> 00:11:53,795
Uh, yeah. Milano?
Poison ivy 2.
265
00:11:53,862 --> 00:11:55,397
Don't even have
to watch any of the story.
266
00:11:55,464 --> 00:11:56,431
Ooh.
267
00:11:56,499 --> 00:11:58,099
Marshall: Yeah.
268
00:12:00,586 --> 00:12:02,887
Holy mother of god.
269
00:12:04,040 --> 00:12:05,306
Steven.
Oh, hi.
270
00:12:05,374 --> 00:12:08,376
Hey! God, I feel like
I haven't seen you
271
00:12:08,443 --> 00:12:09,744
in forever.
Yeah.
272
00:12:09,812 --> 00:12:11,279
How are you?
273
00:12:11,346 --> 00:12:13,682
I...I'm actually fantastic.
274
00:12:13,749 --> 00:12:15,416
Wow. That's great.
275
00:12:15,484 --> 00:12:16,651
You know, we should
totally catch up.
276
00:12:16,719 --> 00:12:17,819
Do you want to
get dinner tonight?
277
00:12:17,887 --> 00:12:19,837
Oh. Uh, you know,
I would,
278
00:12:19,905 --> 00:12:22,407
but I gotta get over
to the v.A. Hospice
279
00:12:22,475 --> 00:12:23,675
to read to some veterans.
280
00:12:23,742 --> 00:12:27,328
Steven, oh, my god.
281
00:12:27,396 --> 00:12:29,197
That's so nice of you.
282
00:12:29,265 --> 00:12:32,299
Uh, you know,
it was nice of them
283
00:12:32,367 --> 00:12:33,601
to fight in a war for us.
284
00:12:33,669 --> 00:12:34,885
Ha ha.
Anyways,
285
00:12:34,953 --> 00:12:35,870
it was nice to see you.
You, too.
286
00:12:35,938 --> 00:12:37,271
Hey, take care.
Ok. Bye.
287
00:12:37,339 --> 00:12:38,272
Bye.
288
00:12:43,662 --> 00:12:44,795
♪ Oh, I believe ♪
289
00:12:44,863 --> 00:12:45,997
♪ I believe ♪
290
00:12:46,065 --> 00:12:46,998
♪ I believe ♪
291
00:12:47,065 --> 00:12:48,332
♪ I believe ♪
292
00:12:48,401 --> 00:12:51,002
♪ in the lord,
the lord... ♪
293
00:12:51,069 --> 00:12:54,171
hey, man,
I brush my teeth
in that sink.
294
00:12:54,239 --> 00:12:56,041
♪ I build faith ♪
295
00:12:56,108 --> 00:12:59,860
♪ by his sweet, sweet love ♪
296
00:12:59,862 --> 00:13:01,463
jerk!
# oh, I believe #
297
00:13:01,530 --> 00:13:02,597
♪ I believe ♪
298
00:13:02,665 --> 00:13:04,298
♪ I believe ♪ ♪ I believe ♪
299
00:13:04,367 --> 00:13:08,236
♪ in the lord,
he made that song ♪
300
00:13:08,304 --> 00:13:10,271
♪ I believe ♪ ♪ I believe ♪
301
00:13:10,339 --> 00:13:12,507
♪ I beleive, yes ♪
302
00:13:12,575 --> 00:13:13,774
♪ in the sweet ♪
303
00:13:13,842 --> 00:13:16,044
♪ jesus lord ♪
304
00:13:16,111 --> 00:13:18,046
♪ I was weak... ♪
305
00:13:18,113 --> 00:13:20,097
let me get that
frisbee back, lloyd.
306
00:13:20,166 --> 00:13:21,098
Dude, seriously.
307
00:13:21,167 --> 00:13:22,083
Jesus, lloyd.
308
00:13:22,151 --> 00:13:23,334
Ow.
309
00:13:23,401 --> 00:13:24,552
What are you doing?
He's gone nuts!
310
00:13:24,620 --> 00:13:26,287
He's gone nuts!
311
00:13:26,355 --> 00:13:29,057
♪ I believe, I believe ♪
312
00:13:29,124 --> 00:13:32,393
[alarm blares]
313
00:13:32,595 --> 00:13:35,330
Fire! Fire alarm!
Fire! Fire! Fire, people!
314
00:13:35,397 --> 00:13:36,897
Fire! Go! Come on,
let's go!
315
00:13:36,832 --> 00:13:38,433
This is not a drill.
Go. Keep going.
316
00:13:38,500 --> 00:13:40,251
Stay, stay calm.
This is not a drill!
317
00:13:45,474 --> 00:13:48,043
No. I definitely,
definitely
smelled smoke.
318
00:13:48,110 --> 00:13:50,511
But worse, it was fumes.
319
00:13:50,579 --> 00:13:51,947
You know,
and it was black
but clear.
320
00:13:52,014 --> 00:13:54,215
You know,
it was deadly.
Very, very deadly.
321
00:13:54,283 --> 00:13:55,783
[Violin playing]
322
00:13:55,851 --> 00:13:58,320
Oh, crap.
323
00:13:58,387 --> 00:13:59,387
There's tina.
324
00:14:02,574 --> 00:14:03,774
Everybody's talking
about the poochie party.
325
00:14:03,842 --> 00:14:05,243
What if she hears?
326
00:14:05,310 --> 00:14:06,644
Well, maybe we
should just invite her.
327
00:14:06,712 --> 00:14:08,112
I mean,
I'm starting to feel guilty.
328
00:14:08,414 --> 00:14:10,982
No, no. That's a bad idea.
Bad idea, you know?
329
00:14:11,150 --> 00:14:12,933
She'll blow the whistle
on us, you know?
330
00:14:13,002 --> 00:14:16,153
And then the red room
will be off-white again.
331
00:14:16,489 --> 00:14:18,039
You know?
Yeah.
332
00:14:18,240 --> 00:14:20,724
Plus, I hear her
and susuki, you know,
333
00:14:20,792 --> 00:14:23,127
they're getting along
really well.
334
00:14:31,219 --> 00:14:33,187
Ok, what about this one?
335
00:14:34,490 --> 00:14:36,724
That's, uh, that's cute.
336
00:14:37,159 --> 00:14:38,843
Ugh.
Yeah.
337
00:14:39,278 --> 00:14:40,662
I mean, does he
even think I'm pretty?
338
00:14:40,730 --> 00:14:42,263
He doesn't even
notice me anymore.
339
00:14:42,331 --> 00:14:44,048
Of course he thinks
you're pretty.
340
00:14:44,115 --> 00:14:45,316
I mean, you've sent him
341
00:14:45,367 --> 00:14:47,385
just so many
"no" signals, right?
342
00:14:47,453 --> 00:14:48,753
But now, you really
gotta work it.
343
00:14:48,821 --> 00:14:49,887
You gotta send him
"yes."
344
00:14:50,323 --> 00:14:51,672
A lot of "yes."
345
00:14:51,740 --> 00:14:52,690
So much "yes."
Mm-hmm.
346
00:14:52,758 --> 00:14:53,624
Yes.
347
00:14:58,814 --> 00:15:00,547
What do you think?
348
00:15:00,615 --> 00:15:03,234
Is that as big
as your boobs get?
349
00:15:04,653 --> 00:15:08,022
Oh, I have a shirt
for that. Heh.
350
00:15:08,090 --> 00:15:10,624
Ah. I knew you would.
351
00:15:10,692 --> 00:15:12,910
[Disco playing]
352
00:15:23,055 --> 00:15:24,922
Poochie palace!
Whoo!
353
00:15:24,990 --> 00:15:26,691
[All cheer]
354
00:15:32,464 --> 00:15:33,631
Here you are.
355
00:15:33,799 --> 00:15:36,651
The party's over there,
goofball.
356
00:15:36,718 --> 00:15:38,286
Hello, lizzie.
357
00:15:42,207 --> 00:15:43,707
Hey.
358
00:15:43,776 --> 00:15:45,076
What you readin'?
359
00:15:45,144 --> 00:15:46,610
The greatest story ever told.
360
00:15:46,678 --> 00:15:48,129
Cool.
361
00:15:48,197 --> 00:15:50,665
Anyway, you look really good.
362
00:15:50,732 --> 00:15:53,117
That's very nice of you.
Thank you very much.
363
00:15:53,185 --> 00:15:57,822
No...Really good.
364
00:15:58,974 --> 00:16:00,741
Hmm.
365
00:16:00,809 --> 00:16:02,961
[Dance music playing]
366
00:16:03,028 --> 00:16:04,295
This is the best, right?
367
00:16:04,363 --> 00:16:07,031
I know! We make such
a great team!
368
00:16:07,099 --> 00:16:11,469
Yeah, right? There's like
nothing we can't do...Together.
369
00:16:11,536 --> 00:16:14,972
[Music switches to hard rock]
370
00:16:15,040 --> 00:16:16,640
Who put this music on?
371
00:16:16,708 --> 00:16:17,575
I don't know.
372
00:16:20,563 --> 00:16:21,729
Damn.
373
00:16:21,797 --> 00:16:26,100
Suddenly, I'm like
a melanie griffith fan here.
374
00:16:26,168 --> 00:16:29,771
Steve, I don't know
how late that party
is gonna go.
375
00:16:29,838 --> 00:16:32,173
I don't know where
I'm gonna sleep.
376
00:16:32,240 --> 00:16:34,175
I have a test in the morning.
377
00:16:34,643 --> 00:16:36,627
I need my sleep.
378
00:16:36,695 --> 00:16:38,896
Well, you can crash
on the couch.
379
00:16:38,964 --> 00:16:40,464
I'll lay down some sheets,
380
00:16:40,532 --> 00:16:42,766
it's surprisingly comfortable.
381
00:16:44,053 --> 00:16:45,653
What am I saying?
382
00:16:45,720 --> 00:16:47,388
[Laughs]
383
00:16:47,456 --> 00:16:50,525
You can sleep in my bed.
384
00:16:50,592 --> 00:16:52,160
I'll sleep on the couch.
385
00:16:54,312 --> 00:16:55,579
How 'bout this...
386
00:16:55,648 --> 00:16:59,316
Why don't we both
stay in your bed?
387
00:16:59,384 --> 00:17:01,819
We could keep each other
up all night.
388
00:17:01,887 --> 00:17:04,071
I thought you had
a test in the morning.
389
00:17:04,139 --> 00:17:06,557
I lied.
390
00:17:08,327 --> 00:17:10,028
Let's not do this.
391
00:17:11,863 --> 00:17:13,748
See, the first time we did it
392
00:17:13,815 --> 00:17:19,637
was because
we were lonely, scared,
desperate, weak.
393
00:17:19,704 --> 00:17:23,324
That's why we gave in
to sin and lust.
394
00:17:23,392 --> 00:17:26,977
There's an attraction
between us... that
cannot be denied.
395
00:17:27,045 --> 00:17:30,047
But if it ever happens
again, it should be
for the right reasons.
396
00:17:30,115 --> 00:17:34,051
And tonight, this, here...
397
00:17:34,119 --> 00:17:36,654
It feels so very wrong.
398
00:17:38,089 --> 00:17:39,423
Yeah.
399
00:17:39,491 --> 00:17:41,959
Very wrong.
400
00:17:42,026 --> 00:17:45,730
I think the red is starting
to freak everybody out!
401
00:17:45,797 --> 00:17:47,865
No, no! The red's
a great color.
402
00:17:47,932 --> 00:17:49,099
It's good! It's soothing!
403
00:17:49,301 --> 00:17:50,684
This is not soothing!
404
00:17:50,752 --> 00:17:52,052
No! Oh!
405
00:17:52,121 --> 00:17:53,554
This sucks!
406
00:17:53,622 --> 00:17:55,106
That's what I told you, man!
407
00:17:55,173 --> 00:17:56,840
Life sucks!
408
00:18:01,864 --> 00:18:03,480
He's a jerk.
I hate him.
409
00:18:03,549 --> 00:18:04,749
I'm trying to, like,
french him,
410
00:18:05,050 --> 00:18:06,267
and he's going off
on the bible.
411
00:18:06,335 --> 00:18:08,953
Lizzie, no, no. I mean,
he's a college kid.
412
00:18:09,021 --> 00:18:10,004
Right? I mean, he's a...
413
00:18:10,071 --> 00:18:11,622
next week,
it'll be something new.
414
00:18:11,690 --> 00:18:12,840
I hate him!
415
00:18:12,908 --> 00:18:13,858
Do it with him!
416
00:18:13,925 --> 00:18:15,926
No, forget it!
I'm gonna call eric.
417
00:18:15,995 --> 00:18:16,927
Where the hell is my phone?
418
00:18:16,979 --> 00:18:19,847
Don't call... aah. God.
419
00:18:24,069 --> 00:18:25,503
There's a mosh pit in there.
420
00:18:25,571 --> 00:18:27,505
No. Somebody just
ripped my poster
421
00:18:27,573 --> 00:18:29,006
of the french people kissing.
422
00:18:29,074 --> 00:18:30,341
I cannot take this!
423
00:18:30,408 --> 00:18:32,343
But they're playing
dido in there right now
424
00:18:32,410 --> 00:18:36,714
and everybody's
slow dancing and really
mellowed out right now.
425
00:18:36,782 --> 00:18:40,234
Oh, look, there's tina.
426
00:18:40,302 --> 00:18:41,852
Yeah, we should probably
get back to the palace.
427
00:18:41,920 --> 00:18:42,987
Hey, tina!
428
00:18:43,055 --> 00:18:44,388
Hey.
429
00:18:46,825 --> 00:18:50,028
Uh...Listen,
I just, um...
430
00:18:50,095 --> 00:18:51,863
I wanted to apologize.
We meant to...
431
00:18:51,930 --> 00:18:53,531
we were trying
to find you everywhere.
432
00:18:53,598 --> 00:18:56,100
You wanna come
to the party?
We're throwing a party.
433
00:18:56,168 --> 00:18:59,687
No. We kept you
from getting the room
in our suite
434
00:18:59,755 --> 00:19:02,156
because we wanted
to keep it
as a party room,
435
00:19:02,224 --> 00:19:05,009
but the room's yours.
I'm really sorry.
436
00:19:05,077 --> 00:19:06,677
The room is mine?
437
00:19:06,745 --> 00:19:08,046
Yeah.
438
00:19:08,113 --> 00:19:10,114
Oh! [Squeals]
439
00:19:10,182 --> 00:19:12,083
Ha! Ha!
440
00:19:14,019 --> 00:19:17,254
[Singing indistinctly]
441
00:19:17,322 --> 00:19:19,607
So where'd you say
that party was at?
442
00:19:19,674 --> 00:19:21,859
Why, the party's
in your new room!
443
00:19:24,312 --> 00:19:26,047
'Cause you know
when you live with tina,
444
00:19:26,114 --> 00:19:27,614
it's a party every night.
445
00:19:27,682 --> 00:19:31,252
Ooh, boy!
It's a party every night
livin' with tina!
446
00:19:31,320 --> 00:19:32,686
Mmm! Yeah!
447
00:19:32,754 --> 00:19:34,355
Yeah. You like slipknot?
448
00:19:34,422 --> 00:19:36,390
Slipknot rocks!
449
00:19:43,965 --> 00:19:45,032
Luke?
450
00:19:48,137 --> 00:19:49,686
Luke, what are you doing?
451
00:19:51,172 --> 00:19:54,108
Hey, baby! What,
uh... ahem.
452
00:19:54,175 --> 00:19:56,143
What's up?
453
00:19:56,245 --> 00:19:59,780
I don't... I thought
that you said it, uh,
454
00:19:59,848 --> 00:20:02,149
it's not about girls,
it's about god.
455
00:20:02,217 --> 00:20:04,602
That was me.
I said that, right?
456
00:20:04,670 --> 00:20:06,637
Yeah! Um...
457
00:20:06,705 --> 00:20:10,708
Time out.
Is she fine?
Is she fine?
458
00:20:10,775 --> 00:20:12,610
If she ain't fine, just say it.
459
00:20:12,678 --> 00:20:14,778
What, you... you gonna
blame me for this?
460
00:20:14,846 --> 00:20:16,480
Oh...Come on... hey...
461
00:20:16,548 --> 00:20:18,816
hey, come on, don't be mad.
462
00:20:18,884 --> 00:20:20,401
Hey, steve.
463
00:20:20,468 --> 00:20:22,920
She was sent by god!
464
00:20:24,189 --> 00:20:25,590
Whoa, whoa, wait.
465
00:20:25,657 --> 00:20:27,458
Come on. Come on.
Come on. No.
466
00:20:27,526 --> 00:20:29,360
No. Ah.
467
00:20:29,428 --> 00:20:32,163
Just open up, ok?
I'm so sorry.
468
00:20:32,231 --> 00:20:33,280
Go away.
469
00:20:33,348 --> 00:20:35,816
But it feels right now.
It feels so right.
470
00:20:35,883 --> 00:20:37,852
No, just...Ah.
471
00:20:39,421 --> 00:20:42,423
Come on, lizzie.
I believe in sin.
472
00:20:42,491 --> 00:20:45,727
Sin is good, you know?
473
00:20:45,794 --> 00:20:47,395
Aw...
474
00:20:47,463 --> 00:20:51,815
[Violin plays]
475
00:21:25,967 --> 00:21:28,753
That was heavenly.
476
00:21:28,820 --> 00:21:31,055
It sucked.
477
00:21:37,963 --> 00:21:39,130
Aw, what's the matter,
dollface, down in the dumps?
478
00:21:39,197 --> 00:21:40,464
Sucks to be you, huh?
479
00:21:40,531 --> 00:21:41,932
What's with you,
lloyd's of london?
480
00:21:42,000 --> 00:21:43,867
You take one mind-blowing
philosophy class
481
00:21:43,935 --> 00:21:45,786
and all of the sudden
you're [Mispronouncing]
Jean paul sartra.
482
00:21:45,853 --> 00:21:47,405
It's sarte.
483
00:21:47,472 --> 00:21:49,240
Oh, so now you've
got this existentialist
hook thing, too?
484
00:21:49,308 --> 00:21:51,325
Well, that's great,
'cause all you need
is a little more mystique.
485
00:21:51,393 --> 00:21:53,995
Now you've got a chance
with all the freaky chicks
I was gonna get.
486
00:21:54,062 --> 00:21:55,730
I've taken so much
acne medication,
487
00:21:55,797 --> 00:21:57,464
my lips are splitting in half!
488
00:21:57,533 --> 00:21:58,649
This might cheer you up:
489
00:21:58,717 --> 00:22:00,585
You're hotter than most chicks.
490
00:22:00,652 --> 00:22:01,986
What are you
doing in college, anyway?
491
00:22:02,053 --> 00:22:04,088
People like you
don't need to know
how to read.
492
00:22:04,155 --> 00:22:06,641
Nice nose.
493
00:22:06,708 --> 00:22:09,743
Captioned by the national
captioning institute
... Www.Ncicap.Org...