The buzzfinger homepage.
Poor Jay Leno.
No, under that.
That's you and Alyssa Vaughn,
Together.
No way!
That's Beck
And Alyssa Vaughn, together.
why are you guys
So impressed?
'cause Alyssa Vaughn
Is famous.
and hot.
her father's a billionaire.
and hot.
Ah, I didn't mean her father is.
I drank fish pee.
explain this.
she's in my yoga class.
Some paparazzi showed up
And took that pic,
But we're just friends.
And how did Jade react
When she found out
You were friends
With Alyssa Vaughn?
Jade was cool with it.
She threw a rock at me.
yeah, well I'd be careful,
'cause I don't think
Jade's the type
To be okay with...
attention!
Attention everyone!
Stop while I talk.
As you all know, I'm Trina vega.
Now, if you look at the flyers
That just landed on you,
You'll see that starting
This Friday night,
I will be performing
My own one-woman show
Called Trina!,
With an exclamation point.
hey! Shut up!
it's a play
That I wrote myself
That will not only
Touch your heart,
But blow your mind.
Now, if you look at
These flyers, you'll see that...
could you pass those out?
Hey, we're not done
Talking about this.
I am.
well, I'm not.
listen, Alyssa Vaughn
Is just a friend.
yeah, a friend
Who's already sent you
Six text messages today.
seven.
you don't know that's her.
is it?
what's your favorite
Tropical fruit?
the mango.
And I don't like
Your new little relationship
With Alyssa Vaughn.
it's a text message.
and what does it say?
Maybe, "hi, Beck.
"my daddy just got richer
"and I got prettier.
Let's make out."
okay, let me see
If I understand you.
let's see if you do.
because you and I date,
I can't be friends
With other girls.
you can be friends
With ugly girls,
But not girls who are
Gorgeous socialites,
Who text message you
A hundred times a day.
you know, you...
Tori, Tori, can you come here?
what?
if you were my girlfriend...
oh, great way to start
The question.
Would you be
All freaked out
That I'm just friends
With Alyssa Vaughn?
who cares what she thinks?
honestly, I wouldn't love it.
I care what she thinks.
how can you say that,
You don't even...
you know,
I really don't wanna be
In the middle of this.
no, you stay right here.
no.
you don't think a girlfriend
Should just trust her boyfriend?
no, I do.
get out of here, Tori.
I'd love to.
stay.
all right, you know what?
tell me what.
no, no, don't tell him what.
we're done.
Jade.
so, you're breaking up
With me?
no, no, no, no, no.
She's not.
yeah, I am.
oh, she is.
you're being ridiculous.
what do you care?
I'm not your girlfriend anymore.
come see my one-woman show,
Friday night.
It starts at 8:00 sharp!
whatcha know, fro?
ha, he called you fro,
'cause your hair is all silly.
yeah.
hey, you gotta check out
This new app I got for my phone.
It lets you do crazy effects
When you're shooting video.
cool.
Um, so, you know
How I used to write
For the school newspaper?
I thought
They shut the paper down.
they did, but, uh...
Some of the seniors
Started one online, you know,
Kinda underground
For school news and stuff.
I know, the slap.
the slap dot com.
the dot com was implied.
anyway, so for the slap,
I'm the person in charge.
I made your head fat.
Say cheese, fathead.
cheese.
Anyway, for the slap,
I'm the person
In charge of writing reviews
For all the plays
Here at school.
yeah?
well, I'm so busy.
you're not busy.
And...
And you're such a good writer,
I was thinking, maybe...
I'm not writing a review
For Trina's show.
but what if her play
Is awful?
what if?
Man, you know
Her show's gonna bite.
I know.
And if I write a bad review,
Trina is going to kill me.
oh, so it's okay
If she kills me?
she'll have a harder time
Killing you.
You're all firm and developed,
And I'm still working
On the last chapter of puberty.
and he is a slow reader.
I thought Trina's play
Opens Friday.
it does, but I'm seeing
Her last dress rehearsal,
And I don't wanna be
The only one in the audience.
so take Rex.
I'm staying home
And taking a hot bath.
look man, don't panic yet.
Maybe Trina's play
Won't be so bad.
♪ chicaaaaagooooooo... ♪
♪ it's a city that's exciting, ♪
♪ it's a city that's inviting, ♪
♪ it's a city for a woman ♪
♪ just like me ♪
♪ there's a lake ♪
♪ they call lake michigan ♪
♪ I think I'm really ♪
♪ fitting in, ♪
♪ this city is ♪
♪ my perfect cup of tea ♪
♪ chicaaaaagooooo... ♪
the doctor says
I ain't never gonna walk again,
Not even on cructhez.
But I'm gonna
Tell you something, "I scared.
I'm a woman, in chicago,
Who's scared."
No.
Stop.
Hey, Jade.
you look a little like a lady
Who could use
Some lunch buddies.
please.
well, I just thought
That you were mad, because of...
I broke up with Beck.
Okay?
I dumped him.
you are amazing.
You know that?
is that Alyssa Vaughn?
yeah, so?
nothing, she's gross.
French fry?
gross?
Look at her.
Oh, that girl is smoking hot.
I'm serious.
I should shut up.
look, he didn't mean
To say that.
I don't care.
If Beck wants to date that,
I hope he has tons of fun
With it.
what?
you're hurting your burrito.
Hello, Robbie.
Hi.
have you been avoiding me?
avoid?
Um, no, I'm just been here
Having some cream
Of mushroom soup.
what do you think
Of my show last night?
your show,
I thought it was uh...
Very...
you said it stunk.
what did that say?
nothing.
Um, he doesn't know
What he's saying.
He's on special medication.
I am not on medication.
are you gonna write
A good review of my show or not?
Trina, see...
I'm a journalist,
And it's my job
To write the truth.
And to be candid,
I didn't think
That your performance was all...
I'm gonna say this once,
So listen.
okay.
I've worked my butt off
On that performance,
And you're gonna write
A good review.
You feel me?!
I feel a mushroom in my nose.
Aah.
write a good review
Of my show!
there it is.
mine!
15-love.
Tori, you messed up my shot.
I don't wanna play anymore.
You get it.
Jade?
And now you're in my house.
this kite is broken.
okay?
And?
I was just walking around,
And I saw this kite
Stuck in a bush,
And... it's broken,
Someone needs to fix it.
you want me to fix your kite?
will you forget
About the stupid kite?
I'm sorry I brought it up.
I want Beck back.
but you broke up with Beck.
I know, just like
When I was seven
And I threw away
My potato patch pal,
But then I realized
I wanted him back.
But it was too late,
'cause my mother
Already gave it away
To some greedy orphans.
Jade, if you wanna get back
Together with Beck,
Then why don't you
Just tell him?
I did, but he rejected me.
Not to be mean,
But why are you coming to me
For help?
because I don't want anyone
Who's cool to see me like this.
okay, maybe you should...
Wait, are we friends?
We're not even friends.
well, yeah,
But if you help me,
Maybe I'll like you.
so, if I help you,
I get a mean friend
And a broken kite.
please, just please,
Talk to Beck for me.
okay, okay, okay,
I'll talk to Beck.
do it soon.
Ah, I got a little makeup
On your pillow.
that's okay.
I'll just ask my grandmother
To make me another one,
If she ever comes back to life.
Push the button
By the door, sweetie.
Okay, thanks.
Who is it?!
I know that's you, Beck.
thanks, Consuela.
enter.
so, this is where you live?
is that bad?
no, it's cool.
It's just, you know,
Most high school guys
Don't live in a rv
Parked in their
Parents' driveway.
well, my parents said
If I live under their roof,
I gotta live by their rules.
ah, so your roof...
My rules.
so, you're probably wondering
Why I'm here.
Like, "hey, Tori's here,
Whaddup wid dat?"
that's how I talk?
no, that's just
My generic boy voice.
ah, I like it.
Do more.
okay.
Um, "hey man, why don't you
"get back together with Jade?
"you know what I'm sayin'?
Yeah."
I should get back together
With Jade?
why?
'cause she's, you know,
Awesome.
guess what?
what?
I'm glad
Jade and I broke up.
why?
because I can't remember
The last time
She did one nice thing for me.
oh, come on, didn't you just
Have a birthday?
She didn't get you anything
For your birthday?
she got me a can of lemonade.
'cause he likes lemonade.
yeah, but out of a can?
he drank it.
yeah, but...
do I have a boyfriend
Or don't I?
do you want one?
walk away.
Curly!
Hi, Trina.
Is that a new shirt?
don't look at my shirt.
I went to theslap.Com
This morning and I didn't see
Your review of my show yet.
I know.
when are you posting it?
the deadline is flexible,
So I'm just...
Oh, please don't...
your review
Better go up today,
And it better make
My show sound awesome!
still got some work to do.
aw, my canadian sweater!
It's not funny.
Trina keeps pressuring me
To write a good review
Of her terrible play,
And I can't lie.
her play was that bad?
so bad, it was laughable.
okay, okay.
Then, say it was
The funniest play
You've ever seen.
oh, what are you
Talking about?
review it like a comedy.
comedy?
that's brilliant.
hey, no charge.
thanks, man.
no, wait, give me 10 bucks.
absolutely not.
20.
are two 10s okay?
help me.
I tried.
Maybe you just need
To forget about Beck.
What are you doing?
And now we're in a closet.
how can Beck
Not want me back?
I'm so cool, and hot.
I've got it all.
yeah, but guys
Don't just care
About how cool and hot you are.
well, what else is there?
Beck said you haven't done
One nice thing for him
In two years.
that is so not true.
We've only dated a year
And eleven months.
well, maybe
He'd take you back
If you did something
Nice for him.
you mean, like
Make him fresh lemonade?
if you want Beck back,
You're gonna have to think
Bigger than beverages.
a dog.
okay, if you're
Gonna be rude...
No.
Beck's always saying
How he wants a dog,
A rotten-hymer.
a rottweiler?
yes, that's what he wants.
Okay, what's our next move?
just get the boy a dog!
go, go out.
Out now. Run...
and then at 10 P.M.,
When president lincoln
Was watching the play
At ford's theater,
Booth quietly slipped
Into lincoln's box,
Pulled out a derringer
And shouted...
I'm gonna kill you!
no.
man, you better run
Before the girl...
Rex!
Trina, I'm teaching a class
Right now.
how dare you call
My one-woman show a comedy?!
I had to follow
My conscience!
Trina, out of this classroom.
I know where you live.
no, you don't.
We moved last year.
what's your new address?!
3707 cahuenga.
It's a duplex, we're on top.
got it.
Trina vega's one-woman show
Will now begin.
in the beginning,
There was nothing,
And then, there was woman.
Wow, I can't believe I'm here
In the city of chicago.
Why, anything could happen
To a woman like me,
Here in Chicago.
♪ chicaaaaagooooooo... ♪
♪ it's a city that's exciting ♪
♪ it's a city that's inviting ♪
♪ it's a city for a woman ♪
♪ just like me ♪
♪ there's a lake ♪
♪ they call lake michigan ♪
♪ I think I'm really ♪
♪ fitting in ♪
♪ this city is ♪
♪ my perfect cup of tea ♪
♪ chicaaaaagooooooo... ♪
Okay, wait one sec.
Beck's asleep.
Give me the dog.
okay.
Oh wait, he has a runny nose.
dogs don't know
How to blow their nose.
okay, give me the dog.
Okay, go on, go in there.
Go lick Beck's face, good boy.
Ahh, okay, if this makes Beck
Like me again,
I'm gonna owe you big time.
you already owe me big time.
what's going on?
I don't know.
Beck, Beck.
Are you okay?
does he sound okay?
Beck!
Get him off me.
that was horrible.
I know.
now, he's never gonna
Take me back.
that is not
The key issue right now.
well, what are we gonna do?
no, not the face,
Not the face.
what is going on?
get back.
Beck?
how can you be out here?
you're in there
Being mauled by a dog.
a dog?
My dad's in there.
your dad?
oh, my god.
dad, dad.
Whoa, that's a big dog.
Dad.
I'm doing it.
I'm a woman in chicago,
Learning how to walk again,
Thanks to doc stevens
And my new plastic legs.
Take that, chicago.
You're no match
For a woman like me.
From now on,
I'm callin' this city...
She-cago!
yes, you're welcome.
You're all welcome.
Yes, it's okay to laugh.
I'm hilarious.
I'll meet you
At the hospital.
okay.
we're sorry.
so sorry.
oh, why.
he'll be fine.
thanks.
hey, are you in college yet?
bye.
Tori told me
To get you a dog.
dude.
okay, it was kind of my idea,
But I didn't think
The dog would bug out like that.
I just wanted you to have a dog,
Because I know you've talked
About getting one
Ever since I met you,
And I thought that maybe...
You love me again.
who said I stopped?
I ruined the moment.
it's cool.
And I really do owe you.
hey, um, it's getting
Kinda late,
So I was wondering
If maybe you could
Drive me home?
it's not that far a walk.
try not to swallow each other.
All right, check this out
From TheSlap.com.
♪ not a fantasy ♪
♪ just remember me ♪
♪ when I make it shine! ♪
You were off key.
No, I wasn't.
Yeah, you were
Totally off key.
But, I mean, who isn't?
Okay, there's a lot
More stuff like that
At TheSlap.com.
So go there.
Sync by fant0m www.addic7ed.com