Okay, come on. Take your seats.
Today is warrant sweep day.
I know, we all hate sweeps. We all hate sweeps.
But as long as they've got open warrants, we've got to serve them.
You've all been assigned several suspects. Find them. Bring them in.
If you see one of your regulars, bring them in, too.
We've probably got an open warrant for them, too.
Word on the street is gonna spread quickly.
We've only got a three to four hour window.
And listen, these are the worst of the worst...
...so watch out for yourself and watch out for your partner.
That's it.
Go find 'em.
These are all over the place.
Anybody got an Echo Park for a Koreatown?
Here. But you gotta take Alvarado Corridor, too.
Here, let me see that.
Is that Virgil? Beautiful.
Asshole took a swing at me last time in front of some kids.
I got this one. Sarge says you got a visitor.
Police! Freeze, suckers!
What's the matter?
You all right?
- He had a knife. - A john?
Okay. Let me see.
He seemed normal, you know?
- Yeah. - Even paid up front.
I go to put the condom on, and the asshole...
He smacks me! He tries to rape me!
I know a rape for Christ's sake.
All right, what then?
I kicked and scratched till I got away.
I got some of his license plate.
I want this prick hurt.
Dutch. Yeah?
I need a favor.
Connie here had a bad night.
Aceveda just dumped a ton of warrants on my desk...
You want me to serve them for you?
No, I'll kick down my own doors, thank you.
Can you get her to a hospital? Find out who cut her up?
...and you can tell me what happened on the way.
Go on.
Are you coming, too? I'll check in on you later. I swear.
Dutch boy.
Thanks. I owe you one.
Freeze! Police!
Get down! Get down on the floor right now!
You, get down! Virgil. Remember me?
Yeah, I remember. On your face.
Fuck!
I'll tell you what...
...you tell me when these bracelets get too tight, all right?
Yeah. Just like that. Yo, what happened to the tunes?
Hands up!
Get your hands on your head. Get out here.
Come on.
Damn. You're... Derrick Tripp.
Derrick Tripp, yeah.
Jersey's in town tonight to play the Lakers.
You miss the exit for the Staples Center?
No, man. I'm just chillin'.
Chillin' with cheeba is a problem here in LA.
Grab some wall.
Come on, man. This is just a private party.
That's some party favor.
I got stalkers.
Is that right? You got a permit for this?
Left it in Jersey. That's a shame.
What are we gonna do about this?
Get them back down to the barn. All right, let's go. Get up.
You stay put. Let's go have some fun.
Yeah.
Check this out.
It's gonna be a zoo when we haul this guy in.
Yeah.
I never liked him. He always gives the Lakers fits.
Not tonight he won't.
Yeah? Why is that?
How'd you like to change the course of sports history?
What do you need it for?
We're conducting some surveillance across the street.
How long you gonna be here?
Out by tonight.
You gonna break anything? Don't plan on it.
It's a bitch to collect from the city, you know?
Here's a deposit.
Drop them in the mailbox when you leave.
Appreciate it.
Come on.
What are we doing here?
Just keeping you hidden until we get a handle on this thing.
Did you really do that sneaker commercial in one take?
No way. That was some C.G.I. mojo.
One take. All real.
You're the man.
Sponsors ain't gonna be too thrilled to hear about this.
- I got a morals clause in my contracts. - Let me see if I can help you out.
Give me one minute.
- Hello? - Hi there, Captain. Vic Mackey here.
- What are you up to now? - I got a little problem.
I just arrested Derrick Tripp on weapons charges.
The basketball player? Exciting.
Right. He's playing against the Lakers tonight.
We're meeting Matthew's teacher tonight. Don't forget.
I certainly won't, sir.
Would it help if I dropped off some clothes at work?
It certainly would. Okay, then.
I'll tell him. Lamansky's got the address.
Is that it or should I keep talking?
It won't be necessary. I'll see you soon.
The Captain's a big fan.
He's gonna come down here personally and make this thing go away.
- Cool. - In the meantime, just chill out.
You're nuts, man.
Without Tripp's penetration and outside shot...
...the Lakers are a lock.
Damn. I gotta call my bookie.
You know what I love?
I love what you said to that ref in game six last year.
I had to say something.
- That call was weak. - Looked like a foul to me.
Where was you watching it from?
Your 20-inch black and white?
We stopped by Big Five.
How about a couple autographs?
- The Captain's on his way, right? - Any minute now.
I don't usually sign for free.
- You're kidding. - $150 a pop.
Even little kids? People send their kids up to score.
"Derrick, please sign this for me. "
And then Daddy scalps it on the Internet.
You got that.
Derrick, sign this one for my son Matt.
It's on the up-and-up.
Yeah, man. Cool.
$15 million a year, and you gotta charge for an autograph?
Wouldn't you say that's kind of weak?
The papers print $15 million.
But after my agent, taxes, lawyers, publicist...
...and business manager, $15 mil it ain't.
That's rough. So what's that, like, $6 million?
Ain't $15 mil, is it? No, it isn't.
So, look, I put a call in to Murphy, man. The spread is six and a half.
Lem and Ron are in for $1,000 each. I'm in for $5,000. What about you?
- I'll pass. - What, are you kidding?
Nobody knows about this. It's like free money.
The Lakers can clinch home court for the playoffs, man.
- It's not about the money. - It is to this asshole.
$150 a pop. I'm surprised the guy can sign his own name.
- What do you care? - I don't.
What are we gonna do about the rest of our warrants?
Already took care of it.
Vic Mackey called.
Told me to turn myself in.
The line forms over there.
Goddamn warrant sweeps.
Problem, Nathan?
I'm one person doing a two-man job. Look at this.
I know.
Fortunately, I have my M.V.P. Running the show.
- M.V.P.? - Most Valuable Policeman.
I wouldn't schedule sweeps...
...if I wasn't sure you'd be anchoring the desk.
You're not gonna let me down, are you?
- Of course not, sir. - That's what I wanted to hear.
Capt. Aceveda? Yes?
Marsha Kramer, attorney for Derrick Tripp.
The basketball player?
There's no hits on killers raping hookers at knife point.
What about the partial plate?
The one our bag bride scribbled on her hand...
...while running for her life?
600 matches.
I'll have her look at every single one.
Hooker murders are up for the entire east side.
Past few show some similarities.
You're studying killings on the east side?
The whole city, actually.
You never know when a disturbing pattern's gonna emerge.
I think I'm witnessing a disturbing pattern.
Just making sure nothing slips through.
You're just looking for something big and juicy.
Three months ago, Griffith Park. Beaten with a pipe.
Six weeks ago, Eagle Rock. Strangled by hand.
Two weeks ago, liquor store dumpster. Choked with a rope.
Different locations, different weapons. There's no pattern.
- They're all posed face down. - You're stretching, son. Try yoga.
Connie was supposed to be number four. We need a task force.
You need more evidence than that.
I'm taking it to Aceveda.
All he's gonna do is say no.
No.
Let's find the guy who attacked Connie, see if we can tie him to the other murders.
Sounds like a plan.
Please. This is a mistake. Where have I heard that before?
Got another one for you, Nathan. I see that.
Excuse me.
- Haven't I seen you hanging around? - Step back.
No, I have, haven't I?
Hanging around outside The Abbey.
- Abbey? - You know, West Hollywood, man.
- How come you never go in? It's fun. - You've got the wrong guy.
Whatever you say, Officer.
Stand back and wait in line.
I told you, he's not here.
I gave you a description. Why can't Vic take care of this?
We're helping you, hon. Keep looking.
Wait.
That's him.
That's the asshole.
"William Greeley, trespassing on federal grounds...
"... as part of an environmental protest. "
Three years ago. "Charges dismissed. "
Not exactly a criminal mastermind. You sure?
Of course, I'm sure. I'll call for a warrant.
So...
...you and Vic are...
...friends?
Interesting.
Vic and me have a bond...
...that transcends sex.
Pull it!
Don't move.
Police! Freeze!
What is this?
Bedroom's clear. William Greeley?
Yeah.
Put some clothes on, man.
- Bolt cutters! - Stay out of there! You got no right!
You wanna bet on how many heads he's got icing down in there?
No, thanks.
It's not mayonnaise.
You keep away from my children!
No!
Vic.
- Vic. A word, please. - Sure.
Who's your friend?
This is Marsha Kramer. An attorney representing Derrick Tripp.
Mr. Tripp was last seen in your custody.
We were serving a warrant to one of his homeboys.
He was there. The drugs weren't his, he was free to go.
He was a good guy. Signed a couple autographs.
- Is something wrong? - Tripp is missing.
Missing?
He's not answering his cell phone.
His friends, family, teammates, management, me.
No one has heard from him.
Weird.
Mr. Virgil Lewis said that it looked like you were taking Mr. Tripp somewhere.
Is this the same Virgil Lewis...
...I just busted sucking on a joint as big as your arm?
I think Virgil's memory might be a little hazy.
I left Tripp a while ago. I'm sorry, I can't help you.
This is totally unacceptable. Vic?
They stitch you up okay?
Between this and my cesarean, I'm a goddamn road map.
Jesus Christ.
Those detectives won't let me leave.
- I gotta go see somebody. Soon. - All right. Calm down.
Go back there and chill out. I'll find out what's going on, all right?
Go on.
I'd never hurt anyone.
- What kind of work do you do, William? - I was an actuary.
What about now? I walked away six months ago.
Needed some time off? Pressure gettin' to you?
It's easy to lose your perspective working every day.
What does this have to do with anything?
What do you do for fun with all that free time?
I have some hobbies.
I know. Nice sperm collection.
Thank you.
Jag?
Nope.
- Rolls? - Please.
Lamborghini? Sure. That's a sweet ride.
Where the hell's this Captain?
Should be here within the hour.
I ain't waitin' no hour.
Where do you think you're going, sport?
This Captain's kickin' the charges anyway.
I'll leave him some tickets for tonight's game.
You're staying here.
See, this meeting's too big. I ain't gonna miss it.
Yeah? Who's it with?
One of my little LA honeys I bang when I'm in town.
Maybe she would prefer conjugal visits.
Bring her on down here, man. There's a bedroom.
What? It'll help pass the time till the Captain shows.
If the men's room at Spago's worked for her...
...I guess this'll do.
You're a real classy guy.
Here. Here, yo. Use my cell phone.
Where were you last night? Home.
Can anyone vouch for that? I live alone.
Did you go out? Yeah.
Where?
You know, maybe I didn't go out.
- I don't really remember. - Which is it, William?
What about December 15? Were you out then?
Sheez, I don't know. Probably at home.
What about February 5?
- Home. - Always home.
- Filling up those jars is a full-time gig? - Back to last night...
The name "Kitty Weir" mean anything to you? She was a streetwalker on Sunset.
I don't know what you're talking about.
Dutch.
March 3, Rosita Pedroza on Cesar Chavez.
You killed her, too, didn't you? Dutch.
I'd never kill anyone. I'm pro-life. Jesus Christ.
- You're all over the map. - This freak's straight out of an FBI textbook.
What happened to the original plan?
Nail him for last night's assault, use it as a building block.
Classic facade of innocence and charm, combined with bizarre sexual fetishes.
His kind wants to talk.
All I have to do is lead him down the path. Trust me.
- His ego won't let him shut up. - Could we just close this one case, please?
- I mean, Ted Bundy, anyone? - The attack on the hooker comes first.
Dutch boy.
I asked you to find Connie's john, not Jack the Ripper.
- You've been observing me? - Fred Astaire never danced around so much.
Let me see if I can jog his memory.
No. You tried that with me once. Not again.
Now, you asked Dutch for help, you got it.
We'll get the guy.
Don't make me regret it.
Connie.
They got your guy.
- You gonna let me watch? - Watch what?
You kick the shit out of him.
I think we're gonna have to settle for jail time here.
- I want him to feel the pain I felt. - Look, why don't you come lie down?
I can't lie down!
You know what? I have to get out of here.
I have a need, all right? They need you to stick around...
...in case you can contradict any statement he makes.
Now, stay in here, and I'll take care of your need.
You got it?
Yeah.
Sit.
Just stay here, okay?
Hon.
Little man. There he is.
Come here.
Who was that? That's a case I'm working on.
Got my clothes? Yeah.
Thanks.
Matthew. What a treat to see daddy during the day.
- Let's hope we get to see him tonight. - Hope so.
I can't miss that.
Gotta see little man's teacher and talk to her.
- You know, we've got a play date. - Okay. Thanks for the fresh cape.
Let's go help mommy outside. Come on.
Derrick here? Shane and Drew.
So he's here or...
Yeah.
Where?
Hey, girl.
God, I missed you.
Save it for Spago's.
When are you gonna get traded to a West Coast team?
I'm here now, ain't I?
Go get the sheets warmed up.
Okay.
I'll be right in. Okay.
Damn, that is, like, the hottest chick that's ever been, man.
Her?
Please, dog, Adriana's a...
...par.
I got this one in Seattle, a goddamn birdie.
She's probably spread her legs for half the league.
It's too bad you can't make a jump shot.
Hope you all got your earplugs. I'm goin' in.
Pretty confident.
I'll be over here.
0 for two.
How many warrants we got left? Counting this no-show, one more.
Policía. Sí, sí, señor a.
Buenas tardes, señor a.
A neighbor here makes quite the racket.
She's gonna call us when he gets back.
All right.
Who's up?
Felipe Tejada.
Officer. What?
I really need your help.
Okay, just give me five seconds. Why?
- Look, I'm sorry about what I said before. - You've got three seconds left.
Okay, I passed a bad check. I paid the fine. I got a suspended sentence.
This warrant is a mistake.
- All you gotta do is call my legal aid guy. - That would take another five seconds.
Please?
Look at me.
Now look at the other guys in here.
I'm not supposed to be here.
Stand back.
Gotta be careful with these guys.
All a bunch of con men.
This is a nightmare. I'd never hurt anyone, let alone rape.
I don't even use prostitutes.
I don't have to. Women need me.
- Really? - Yeah, it's a fact. Survival of the species.
Meaning what?
Men find large breasts attractive.
They signify that a woman can amply nourish her young.
Conversely, women respond to some of my assets.
I've seen you buck naked, son.
Your assets don't impress.
No. You see, penis size is overrated.
I'm talking about my testes, the true seed of male virility.
The engine that drives the train.
I am packing a pair you gotta see to believe.
Found an old girlfriend. Greeley's got a hair-trigger temper...
...and an inoperable brain tumor driving him schizo.
That explains a few things.
Doesn't explain why he dumps the bodies face down.
Will you forget about making a name for yourself...
...as the great serial-killer hunter?
We need to corroborate the hooker's story. Period.
He wants to tell us.
Can't this wait? I'm right out front. Yeah? Listen to this crap.
Oh, God!
Any word from the Captain? No.
Call him again. I'm almost done here.
Oh, baby!
Only reason this guy still has teeth left, is 'cause I'm making a killing on this.
- I upped my bet to $10,000. - Later.
Vic?
No! Give me my Evan!
He's burning up, man!
He's fine! Please! My baby!
The guy's a crackhead. Evan!
It's cool. Why don't you give me Evan? No, he's on fire.
No, he's burning up! He's red hot! He's fine! Please!
I gotta cool him down! I'm a doctor. I can cool Evan down.
- You don't look like a doctor. - I get that all the time.
Come on. Why don't you give him to me?
My baby! No, it's too late!
No, don't do that! He's dying!
Where's the dad? He's still under?
Nice save, Vic. Nutjobs have a way of finding me.
Be careful.
This one tried to strangle me on the way over here.
Come on.
Vic, I need a piece. All right. Hold on.
Smoke it by the window. I can't have my office reeking of rock.
When am I gonna see you again?
You know the drill.
Just remember section 101...
...red tank top.
How can I miss that body, right?
- Okay. - See you at the game.
See you, Adriana.
She's a sweet girl.
Boys...
...tell the Captain he missed me.
Another booty call?
One of your sponsors Viagra?
- Shooting rounds at 5:00. - You're not going anywhere, Romeo.
Get this Captain on the phone.
He's not available by phone.
You said you called him. Where is he?
Police business. You'll have to wait.
You been yanking me all day?
- Sit down. - Ain't no captain coming, is there?
I said, sit down. You're bugging me.
You got your autographs, your little peep show.
- The game's over. Color me gone. - I color you staying, nigger.
You'd love it if I popped you...
...got your name in the papers right next to mine.
Come on.
Let's hear what my lawyers have to say about this.
Your badge'll look nice on my mantelpiece...
...right next to my "Rookie of the Year" trophy.
Shane, get off him! Let go. Come on.
I said wait! Vic, please.
Give me the lighter.
Come on. Give it.
Okay. Here.
Blow it out the window.
Aceveda.
Hospital just called.
Baby checked out fine. Good job.
Good. I am curious.
You saved that kid from the same apartment complex...
...where Tripp was last seen.
Crazy, huh?
I lost my wallet during the bust this morning.
Went back to look for it. Some luck.
You're telling me. There's no smoking in here.
My mistake.
Derrick Tripp's Jersey's leading scorer. They're gonna be hurting without him.
No clue where he is?
Come on, Captain. We know how these rich pricks are.
He's probably got his face snorkel-deep in some broad's snatch.
Give him a few hours. He'll come up for air.
You know how these celebrities are. He's probably with a female admirer.
Give it a few hours. He'll turn up.
Step away.
I made some calls. The warrant was a mistake.
I apologize on behalf of the department.
- See, that wasn't so tough, now, was it? - Sorry for the inconvenience.
The only inconvenience is that I'm leaving here...
...without your number.
Excuse me?
I just meant so that I could thank you for doing me this favor.
Who knows? Maybe I could return the favor some day.
If so...
...you know where to find me.
We know about your brain tumor.
No wonder you're angry.
- I'm not a killer. - William, tell me more about your sperm.
So many people waste it...
...with condoms...
...masturbating indiscriminately.
It's a holocaust.
So you collect it.
My tumor may render me impotent one day.
- And with so many women needing me... - You'll still be able to impregnate them.
I want my essence to be passed on to the next generation.
Who doesn't?
I know I do.
Can you give me a second, sport?
No.
It's okay, Dutch.
- It's not okay by me. - Come on, buddy.
Help me out here.
We need our privacy.
Have a seat.
Your name isn't among the sergeants applicants.
- I've been putting it off. - Don't.
If you pass, you'll get my recommendation.
You'll receive a post immediately, and won't wait on a list for months.
Why the big endorsement?
I'd like you in a leadership position.
You mean you'd like to promote a woman.
It's not how you get there. It's what you do once you have the chance.
I'm offering you the chance. I'll think about it.
So I saw the bad check writer was released.
For all his whining, turns out it was a mistake.
But you had to go and check that out.
He got to you. No, I just believed him.
Don't make it a habit.
You do favors for these guys, it comes back to bite you in the ass.
Yeah.
Ricky Harris? Yeah.
Come with us. We have a warrant for your arrest.
Yeah, sure. No problem. All right?
Do you know what? Give me a second.
Pull that stuff out. Get that stuff out!
Is it okay if we come in? Yeah.
Do you mind if we take a look around?
There's nothing here.
Let me see your hands. Put them on top of your head.
You got any drugs in here? No. I'm clean.
Who are your buddies? Nobody.
Come on, I'm ready. Let's just go...
Tattoo man, what are you doing by that couch?
Just standing.
Yeah? Why don't you go stand over there?
- I'm not doing anything. - You heard me. Move.
I thought you wanted him!
One-tango-13 requesting backup. 3015 and a half Sutter.
Come on, everybody's cool. Okay? Let's just go.
Tattoo man, you heard me. Get over there!
Don't you dare move. I will blow your brains out.
Get on the floor! On your stomachs. Put your hands behind your head.
Move it.
Check the couch.
Whatever he's got, I got nothing to do with!
Shut up.
One-tango-13, code 3.
What good's your $15 million now, asshole?
It's only $6 million take home.
Shut up! What's going on here?
This guy's out of control.
I hope you dicks hate your jobs, they're about to disappear!
Thinks he's goddamn Shaka Zulu.
When you can fill 20,000 seats at $200 a pop...
...you'll get the cash and the grade-A tail.
Until then, drag your lily-white ass back home to Simi Valley!
I live in Hollywood, motherfucker. Come here.
- What's the matter with you? - What? The guy resisted.
- Resisted? I asked you to baby-sit. - Somebody needs to teach him a lesson.
By doing what? Executing him?
Why not?
I mean, isn't that what we do now?
I told you, that's over.
We killed a cop.
Lem and Ronnie failed to clear the room...
...and Two-Time killed Terry.
Get over it and don't bring it up again.
Your partner is very uptight. He overcompensates.
He could learn a lot from you.
Very maternal.
You have kids, don't you?
Two.
Boys? Girls.
I knew that.
They still at home?
One's a schoolteacher...
...the other's a newspaper reporter.
- Do you see them much? - Not as much as I'd like.
- You ever think about having more? - Oh!
It would have to be soon.
I'd have to find the right man.
What's he like?
Compassionate.
Responsible.
Honest.
I'm those things.
What if I told you...
...I could give you a son.
Where were you last night?
- If I don't spread my seed, it dies with me. - You found a prostitute.
Come on, Will.
If we're gonna make this step...
...you gotta show me that you're...
...the type of man who's gonna take responsibility...
...for his actions.
Isn't that what a good father is?
She tried to put a condom on me.
Why would she do that?
So you cut her?
I never had to do that before.
Before?
There were other women?
How many?
I wanna trust you.
You'll make 12.
You raped them to spread your seed.
After they're pregnant, they'll forgive me.
- The prostitutes, did you kill 'em? - No.
God, no. I spread life.
Not death.
Okay.
- So when can you and I consummate? - That's not gonna happen.
You promised me something.
You may have thought you heard that...
...but I didn't say it.
Yes, you did. Right here.
You promised me a baby.
You gimme that pussy!
That's mine!
Give it to me! Give it to me now. Get off me.
My balls.
You all right?
The bigger they are...
So, no serial killer? If there is one, it wasn't him.
I heard about your gun bust. Nice.
The wait for backup was the longest two minutes in my life.
It always is. Still, you kept your cool.
Aceveda wants me to take the sergeant's exam.
Wow!
I suck at tests.
I get so much grief for being a woman in this place.
- I can't not pass. - It's not that hard.
For you, maybe.
Could you tutor me?
I could dust off my old notes.
All right. Get out. Get out?
I don't even know where the hell we are.
That's your problem.
- You're an asshole. - Yeah? That's my problem.
- My lawyers are gonna make sure... - You'll keep your mouth shut.
Your homies are still in custody.
One visit to the evidence room and that ounce of weed becomes a pound.
Play any road games in San Quentin?
Are you done with me yet? Tell me somethin'.
Why would you risk everything slumming with those losers?
They was my boys before I made it.
Who else am I supposed to trust now?
The fans?
- You? - Listen, if they were your boys...
...you'd pull 'em up instead of lettin' them drag you down.
Take the subway three stops down to the Staples Center.
That's Derrick Tripp!
Can I get your autograph?
We certainly hate to lose you, Nathan. It's the end of an era.
I guess I just lost that edge.
Of course, I'll give two weeks. Not necessary, really.
I need to train my replacement.
I have a system tracking suspects from processing to the cage that...
Nathan.
We'll manage...
...somehow.
Hey!
I heard you gave sperm-boy a nice whack.
I could use a good ass kicker on my squad.
- Be careful. - Thanks.
We wouldn't have gotten him if it weren't for Dutch.
Yeah, but you were the closer.
You all right?
Come on. Let's go.
Hi.
At the station, you implied that I was gay.
Aren't you?
No.
I'm not.
I know what you mean.
You do?
Sure.
I wasn't gay either...
...until the day I just admitted that I was.
It's okay.
Say it.
The class loves to paint. Cleanup's always the problem.
I've seen it. Thanks for the art supplies.
I got 'em on sale. The kids had a ball.
- Excuse me, we're here for a reason, right? - Of course.
Sit down.
I'm concerned about Matthew.
He's not socializing properly. He's a little shy.
He'll grow out of it. It's more than just being shy.
- Matthew's way behind the other children. - So he's not Michelangelo. So what?
What I'm trying to say is...
...I think there's a problem.
- What kind of problem? - I can't tell you exactly.
Who could tell us exactly?
I think it's something...
...that a developmental pediatrician should diagnose.
A neurologist, maybe.
Trampling New Jersey 101 to 78, clinching home-court advantage...
...throughout the playoffs for the Lakers.
Kobe Bryant had a game-high 35 points.
Shaq chipped in with 29. Derrick Tripp was a no-show...
...after getting stuck in traffic returning from a charity event.
Only in LA.