[Meredith] For most people, a hospital is a scary place.
A hostile place.
- [Pager beeping] - [Lexie exclaims]
[Alex] Sorry.
It's mine.
[Meredith] A place where bad things happen.
You can't pay with that.
Oh, it's, uh... it's my AA chip.
- Six months sober. - Good for you.
[Meredith] Most people would prefer church. Or school.
Or home.
[Voice breaking] Damn it, will you stop crying?
You stop crying.
[Meredith] But I grew up here.
While my mom was on rounds, I learned to read in the OR gallery.
I played in the morgue.
I colored with crayons on old ER charts.
A hospital was my church.
My school.
My home.
A hospital was my safe place.
My sanctuary.
I love it here.
Correction: Loved it here.
- No way. - Yeah.
- No freaking way! - Right?
Oh, my God. OK, um...
- Were you trying to... - No! Total accident.
- I used the thing. - Oh. So are we happy about this?
Or are we exercising our legal right to choose?
OK! All right!
- Congratulations! Let's hug it out. - OK.
- My God... Have you told him? - No, I just found out.
[Pagers beeping]
- Teddy. - Derek.
- You gonna tell him now? - Yeah.
- OK. - How's the Teddy and Owen thing going?
Oh, fantastic. It's going great. I'm completely over it.
[Sighs]
This is very adult. I'm really proud of you, Meredith Grey.
- I'm... proud of me, too? - Yes, yes.
OK.
- Hey, I hope it has his hair. - Me, too!
[Indistinct chatter]
You know where I can find the chief of surgery? Excuse me.
- Chief of surgery? - No idea. Sorry.
Go ask a nurse if you can find him.
- You paged? - She's in a lot of pain.
- OK. - Ruby Kendall. Age nine.
Fever, tenderness over McBurney's point.
All right, appendix. Let me check your belly.
[Gasps] Ow!
Oh... Yeah, you have a very angry appendix.
That's surgery? She needs surgery?
Yes, she does. But the good news is, it's the easiest surgery in the world.
I mean, she's a baby surgeon and she could do it.
You're gonna let me do it?
You're going to let her do the surgery?
No, of course not. I'm gonna do it. I'm kind of fabulous at it.
Ruby, you are gonna be out of here by tomorrow
with a teeny, tiny little scar,
and a good excuse to have your parents feed you ice cream
every night of the week.
Dr. Grey, admit her to peds and make sure she's comfortable
while we get an OR.
What?
Jason Perkins, six-year-old with a comminuted tibia fracture.
You could be nicer. He peed his pants and I cleaned it up before you got here.
Sorry. Good man, Alex. Thanks.
Hi.
[Pager beeping]
You got paged, too?
Come on, Teddy. Cristina's not talking to me, you're not talking to me.
- Come on. - I don't want to talk about it.
I don't want to go over again how you told Derek to give my job away.
I don't want to discuss it, or hear you apologize or forgive you, or anything.
You know what I want? A little bit of peace.
- What do you got? - [Man]... 18-gauge. Get ready to move.
[Sighs]
- Shut up. - I'm sorry. I'm truly sorry.
- Honey, are you hearing this? - I told you.
- You know, I told her, Dr. B. - That doesn't mean I like it.
I really can't have my second surgery today?
Dr. Percy.
Your hemoglobin and hematocrit are extremely low.
Your tank is empty. You need a blood transfusion before we can operate.
- Shut up. - Yes, ma'am.
Do you know how long I've been living with a colostomy bag?
A bag of my poop is attached to me. Do you know what that's like?
It's gross. It's truly the grossest thing I've ever had to deal with.
And I'm starving, because I can't eat solid food for 24 hours before surgery.
Starving. I would eat you if I could.
Yeah, on the plus side, that means no poop in the bag.
- Bill! - OK, we're gonna get blood in you
and Dr. Percy is gonna monitor your blood levels.
And tomorrow, we'll see if we can help lose the poop bag.
Let's get you some food so you don't eat Dr. Percy.
- I don't like him but he's useful. - Can I have real food?
Like pizza? From that one place near that one spot?
With pepperoni and sausage and ham?
If you get the pizza, you also get the bowel prep and enema that comes with it.
Totally worth the pizza. Bring it on.
Back in 15 minutes.
- How hot is my husband's ass? - It's very hot, ma'am.
[Elevator dings]
He's dead, isn't he?
- Is he dead? - He's not dead, ma'am.
You can't go in there. The doctors are working.
He has a serious gunshot wound. They need to concentrate.
They said he was in a car accident. He was shot? Someone shot him?
- I don't... - Oh!
Pete! Oh, my God, Pete!
- Please, wait... Pete? Pete? - [Owen] Extend your incision.
- This guy hit me. - [Owen] Good.
I stopped the car to give him my insurance card.
- [Teddy] Stats are still dropping. - I get out and he shoots me.
- [Machine beeping] - I'm in. Chest tube.
Pete... Pete?!
- Bag him. - Pete!
There's blood in the chest. Clamp that! Call the OR, tell 'em we're on our way.
- Get him ready for transport. - [Woman] They're taking him to surgery.
- Please, he's my husband! - Let her say goodbye.
Owen, there's no time.
Goodbye, baby. I love you. I love you, OK?
Don't die, 'cause I love you! Oh, God! What's happening?
- Out of here, now! - Chest tube secure!
- There wasn't time to waste. - [Owen] There was time.
That might be the last time she sees the man she loves. There was time.
You paged? You heading to the OR?
Yeah, but I need you to cover my post ops, I'm sorry.
- I'm not going into surgery? - Cristina.
I'm talking to Dr. Altman.
- I need you to cover my post ops. - OK, fine. No problem.
Let's go.
- MRI? - Yeah.
We're running!
[Man] Watch out! Coming through.
Clear that line!
Excuse me, I was asking if someone could tell me where I can find the chief.
I'm sorry, sir. If you could just give me a minute, OK?
[Woman] Coming through!
- [Man] The lead was loose. - [Woman 2] I'll let him know. Hold on.
- Excuse me, ma'am? - It's "doctor," what?
I was wondering if you could tell me where I can find Dr. Derek Shepherd?
Um... You know, I don't know.
Can you tell me where his office is? I'm kind of turned around.
Sir, I have a patient having seizures in there. Find a nurse and ask them.
- Ma'am... - You're not supposed to be back here.
I'm not a tour guide. I'm a surgeon, OK?
- [Footsteps approaching] - Dude, what the?
[Grunting]
[Gasping]
[Wheezing]
[Elevator whirring]
Hey! You paged?
I like to say hello to my wife every 48 hours.
You didn't come home last night.
I told you, every Tuesday night, I'm trolling for cases.
Last night, a guy crashed his motorcycle,
had rebar jammed in the base of his skull
and Shadow Shepherd let me do the extraction.
You know what I've been doing? Paperwork.
Know what I have to look forward to today? More paperwork.
This job is just... I would love to have something jammed in my brain.
That way I'd see the inside of an OR.
OK, well... Are you gonna come home early tonight?
Because we can order in and I have some stuff to tell you.
Yeah, I'll be there.
I have to go. I'm on Sloan's post ops.
I hate that you're so happy.
Derek, there's gonna be a lot of dirty sex for you tonight.
Look forward to that.
Hm... Hm.
[Teddy] I'm looking at injuries to the pulmonary artery and the vein.
- Hold pressure in there. - [Jackson] More lap bands.
I'm going to try a temporary Satinsky clamp.
Dr. Altman, Mr. Linehan has hemolytic anemia and elevated LDH.
I suspect post-operative TTP. Shall I start exchange plasmapheresis?
- Yes. Good catch, Cristina. - Hold on, Dr. Yang.
We need to open up the pericardium to gain proximal control.
Dr. Yang should scrub in and Mr. Linehan can wait for an hour.
No, thank you. I'd rather not scrub in.
Keep this stable. Dr. Altman, I'll be right back.
- Cristina. - You pursued me. I didn't.
I gave you an out, and you pursued me. You said...
Do you love her? Or do you love me?
I'm done. We're done.
- Cristina... - We're done.
[Groans]
[Gasping]
No...
Dr. Kepner...
- April, what is it? - Do you know I grew up on a farm?
- What happened? - I...
I grew up on a farm, so you know, blood doesn't bother me, I...
I slaughtered a pig once. That was a lot of blood.
"Bleeding like a stuck pig." That's a saying.
To bleed like a pig, you know. It means something.
But you don't think of people as having that much blood.
I mean, you learn in med school how many pints we all have in us,
but you don't realize it until you see it. You don't get how much blood...
And a skinny person? I mean, my God, Reed, she's almost anorexic.
She's like, five pounds, you wouldn't think she'd have that much blood,
- but she did. She did... - April, April, April!
You're in shock. It's all right. Tell me what happened.
Reed's dead.
Someone shot her.
[Sobbing]
Excuse me, could you tell me where to find the chief?
Dr. Shepherd? He's probably in his office.
Yeah, I've been to his office before.
Can't seem to remember how to get there.
Keep going in circles.
It's in the east wing. That's over by labs, across the catwalk.
Sorry, that's...
You've just gotta cross through the patient floor on three,
then follow the signs to the main lobby
and you should find it, no problem.
- Thank you. - Mm-hm.
[Elevator dings]
Have a nice day.
You, too.
[Gasping]
The police are on their way. What's the procedure?
You're the head of hospital security. How do you not know?
I know it's never happened before.
I found it. "Lockdown. Nobody moves in or out."
Yeah. Nobody moves, nobody breathes until we know what's going on.
Here...
Police are almost here. I'm gonna leave you here. You OK by yourself?
You're leaving... You just said that nobody leaves, nobody moves...
Nobody but me.
I'm the chief. This is my hospital.
- But what if you get shot, or... - Be right back. I'm the chief.
[Sirens wailing]
- Jason Perkins? - Got the chart here somewhere.
- Peds? - Can you page the younger Dr. Grey?
Tell her to get my appy moving?
We're on lockdown.
- What? Why? - Oh, come on.
It's a joke, right? It's a drill or something?
- [Pagers beeping] - OK. It's no joke.
Everyone... everyone!
We're sealing the floor. I don't know why and it doesn't matter why
but nobody goes in or out, past the double doors.
Check on your own patients and then come back and check and see
if there's any others in the queue. We don't have a lot of hands on deck.
And people, do not alarm the makers of the tiny humans.
They will eat you alive.
- I really thought that was a joke. - Sick joke.
- Excuse me? - Uh... Nothing.
[Scoffs] What? You can't be stuck on the same floor as me?
- That's a hardship for you? - Yeah. Frankly, it is.
- Hey, how are you? - Bill hasn't come back with pizza yet.
So, still starving. But, full of fresh blood, which is disgusting.
- Like I'm a vampire. - Mary, you complain too much.
But I do it with a smile.
Face it, I'm an awesome patient. I make your day.
- [Pager beeping] - Let's see...
- What's wrong? - Nothing, just a... page.
[Teddy] I can't get control of this artery.
- He's crashing! - I need more light and another clamp!
[Machine beeping]
- How's it going in here? - Touch and go!
Avery, got a second?
- Has anybody checked their pager? - No, too busy.
There's a shooter in the hospital.
I don't want you to say a word. When the patient is stable,
I want you to tell Hunt and Altman
that nobody goes out of here until they are told.
- Can you handle this? - Yes, sir.
All right, then.
[Owen] OK, BP is dropping.
[Teddy] I've almost got the pulmonary artery controlled. One more second.
[Owen] What did Shepherd want?
Dr. Avery?
Nothing, just wanted to know how long we'd be. He needs the OR.
OK, get in here and suction around where Dr. Altman's working.
Shaky hands, Dr. Avery?
Won't make it as a surgeon if you can't keep your hands steady.
Yes, sir.
Hey.
Did you get that page? Lockdown?
Yeah, I mean, whatever. It means we can't leave.
I never leave here anyway, so what do I care?
Know what? It's probably just a drill. Or a psych patient got out.
Or a baby went missing from the nursery.
Or there's an axe murderer on the loose.
- Axe murderer would be fun. - Mm-hm.
So? How did he react?
Was his world made whole because your womb is not empty and dry?
Did he weep like a bitch baby?
I didn't tell him because he was in a mood.
So I'll tell him later tonight or something. It should be special, right?
Well, you found out in the ladies' room squatting over a stick.
That wasn't very special. Why does he get special?
I don't know. I feel like my head's gonna pop off
because I haven't told him and I want to and I hate that.
It's good news. He should know, right?
Mm-hm.
- You know what? I'm telling him now. - OK.
- What? - I'm coming.
- I wanna see the bitch baby tears. - Cristina...
I'll stand in the hallway. He'll never know I'm there.
I, um...
- I broke up with Owen, OK? - Oh.
OK, come on.
They want attending approval to do the auditory evoked potentials.
- Can you sign for it? - Lockdown.
Kind of crazy, right? Think it's serious?
- Can you just sign... - This Karev thing serious?
- Mark... - I miss you.
- Can you just sign the order? - Sir, you can't leave this area.
- The hospital is in... - [gun firing]
- [Man] Get down, get down! Get down! - [Woman] What just happened?!
[People screaming]
[Woman 2] Let's get out of here!
No. No, no, no...
- No, no, no. - [Mark] Come on!
- She's dead. She's dead. - Come on. I'm getting you out of here.
- Oh, my God! Oh, my God! - Come on! Come on!
[Exhales]
[Man] Two more units on that side!
[Indistinct shouting]
[Man 2]... goes corner to corner.
- Waiting for a... - [man 3] OK, let's go.
Excuse me.
Guys, go around...
[man] Have you talked to the administrator? Sir!
- Officer! What's the situation? - You gotta stand back.
I'm Richard Webber. I'm the chief... I'm the former...
Look, this is my hospital. What's going on?
A shooter took down one of the doctors.
We're not sure whether or not he's still inside. No, sir!
No one in, no one out. The SWAT team is on the way, sir.
- No one in, no one out. - Are you evacuating people?
- Are you getting them out? - Department policy is a lockdown.
Until we know who the shooter is, where the shooter is,
everyone stays in the same place.
- It's safer that way. - Those are my people!
- If someone is shooting... - My guys have this. We do.
We're gonna take care of it.
OK?
OK.
What happened?
[Alex groaning]
I grabbed everything I could think of.
[Seething] I am so incredibly pissed off right now.
- Alex, you've been shot. - [Lexie] Have to get him out of here.
He could come back, Mark. We have to get him out of here.
There's no exit wound.
No exit wound. We're gonna have to flip him.
- Lexie, grab him under the shoulders. - We have to get him out of here.
He's losing blood. We can't move him, now shut up and help!
[Groaning]
Nothing. Damn, the bullet's still in there somewhere.
We're gonna have to wing it. Start an IV. I'll set up a chest tube.
You're gonna be OK, Alex. All right?
I'm gonna kick that guy's ass when I see him.
Has anyone seen Olivia Kagan's chart?
I need albuterol meds for the asthma kid.
Time for 18's dose of ceftriaxone. 34 needs his mommy
and the kid in 35 won't stop crying.
We have, what, 42 kids? Four doctors and nine nurses? That's not enough.
Why don't you put all the kids in the playroom?
We don't have enough staff for a whole floor.
At least they'll all be in one place. We can keep an eye on all at once.
You can't put a bunch of sick kids in the playroom with their beds.
Sure we can.
Stable ones can walk and we have wheelchairs, so let's do it. Move.
- Thanks! - Whatever.
- Do you want to talk about it? - No.
- Owen, I mean. - I know what you mean.
I don't want to... I can't. It's just...
OK, he doesn't know who he loves.
And if it's not me, then... I don't want to talk about it.
- Let's talk about something else. - OK.
You realize you're about to be a godmother.
I'm godmother?
OK, what do I have to do? Talk God to the fetus? I'm not gonna do that.
It means you take care of the kid if I die.
Derek takes care of the kid if you die.
If we die, if we die.
OK, so, if you and Derek are in a plane crash and you die,
- the kid is mine? - Yes.
Have to admit, I kinda hope you and Derek die, just a little bit.
So I can raise the kid with decent priorities.
- I have priorities. - Oh?
- Surgery. - OK, then.
You can raise a good little surgeon. I take it back.
Hey, what are you doing here?
- Uh... Walking. - We're in lockdown.
We're not walking outside.
That's not what lockdown means. It means stay where you are.
- Did you know that's what? - No, I thought it meant...
- Get in here. - Why are we?
There's a shooter loose in the hospital.
- What? - Stay here. Don't move.
I'll come back and get you when it's clear.
Just stay here. Don't move.
Your pulse is coming down.
We have to check your blood counts,
but I think you'll be good to go for surgery tomorrow.
That's the fifth time you've checked your pager.
Uh... It's... habit.
Dr. B., my husband's late. He's never late.
And you're hanging out with me.
You don't really strike me as the hanging out type.
What's going on?
OK, there is a situation.
I'm not exactly sure what it is, but hospital procedure dictates
- that when we're on a... - He's on the floor.
- Who? - The shooter.
A shoot... There's a shooter in the hospital?
Oh, my God.
It's all right, all right?
Put the gun down. Come on, man, don't do anything.
No, please!
- [Gun fires] - [Gasps]
- Dr. Percy, hide! - What?
Just hide! Mary, play dead.
Wait, what's happening?
Shh! Just do not move. Do not breathe.
Dr. Percy, go hide now!
[Bailey drops to floor]
[Moaning] Oh...
This is too much. [sniffs]
OK... OK...
OK...
- OK. OK. - [Metal clinking]
- [Charles] Please, I... - [Gary] Are you a surgeon?
[Charles] Please.
[Gary] Are you a surgeon?
[Charles] Yes, sir. Yes, sir, I am.
- Oh, no. No, no! No, please! - [Gun cocks]
[Gun fires]
[Grunts]
[Gasping]
No! Don't!
Are you a surgeon?
Answer me!
[Stuttering]
No!
[Gasping] No! I'm a...
...a nurse. I'm a nurse.
I'm a... nurse.
I'm sorry...
...for the trouble.
For the mess.
I'm sorry.
[Gun cocks]
[Gasping]
You're doing great, Alex, really great. Now...
I need to put in a chest tube. You're with me, OK?
No chest tube.
[Gasping] I'm OK. Don't cut me.
Lexie, you get the Betadine ready. I'll do the rest, OK?
OK.
- [Alex grunting] - [Lexie] Oh, my God.
[Screaming]
Shut him up. Shut him up.
Oh, my God. Oh, God.
[Trembling] Shhh!
Alex...
- OK, OK... - [screaming]
Shut him up, Lexie. If that guy with the gun hears the screaming,
he's gonna head this way. Now do something to shut him up!
OK, OK. Alex? Shh!
I know that it hurts, but you have to be quiet.
OK?
- [Screaming] - [Mark] Lexie!
- [Screaming muffled] - [Lexie whispering] I'm sorry.
I'm sorry. Shh...
The bad news is, less privacy. But the good news is,
your bunny can make friends with a very attractive bear down the hall.
- Hey, watch it. - Sorry. Sorry.
- I thought we were gonna be friends. - You want to talk about this now?
We're in lockdown, moving kids, God knows what's happening,
- and you wanna talk about this? - We're stuck here.
We have to be together, so, yeah, I wanna talk about this.
OK. Fine.
I tried being friends. Rising above. Tried that and I'm over it.
I'm gonna go the more traditional route of totally hating your guts.
[Scoffs]
OK.
Christopher? Tyler. Tyler? Christopher. You both hate chicken. Discuss.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, I don't deserve this, OK?
I have treated you with nothing but respect and love...
You think you have, but you haven't.
I'm sure it feels great to act like I'm the bad guy,
but that's the biggest load of you-know-what.
I've spent the last month trying to convince myself
that I don't need kids to be happy.
Giving lectures to myself, saying it out loud to you and to Mark.
Turning myself inside out to want what you wanted
and then I stopped and I thought: Did you ever try?
To imagine what it would be like? To change for me?
Because I don't think you did. You dismissed my dream.
Which says to me that you don't give a rat's ass if I'm happy.
I never understood squat about who you are and now I do and I don't like it.
Oh, really, really?
I'm supposed to change for you? Why? 'Cause we're in love?
Because you fall in love all the time.
- Men, women... - Excuse me! Dr. Robbins.
I don't feel good!
[Mary] Oh, my. Oh, my...
- He shot me. He shot me. I'm shot. - You're going to be OK.
Mary, over there, some gauze and surgical pads. Get them for me.
No, I gotta go. I gotta go home. We shouldn't be here.
My husband, I have to find my husband.
- And that man, he could come back... - Mary!
You're not going anywhere. That man is not coming back.
I need you to pull yourself together and bring me those supplies.
- [Charles gasping] - [Miranda] OK?
- I was doing charts and now I'm shot? - OK, you're just fine.
You're just fine.
Good, very good.
OK...
All right, Mary?
Go over to the window and see if there's anybody out there that can help us.
Mary, come on, come on!
Go to the window now! See if somebody can help us. Go on.
- Go on! OK? - [Whimpering]
Um... There's... There's...
[screaming]
[Mary]... a dead security guard.
He's dead.
There's no one else to help us.
There's no one else.
That's fine.
That's...
Where's that... water coming from?
Dr. Bailey? You're crying.
You're crying.
Mary, you need to come over, wipe my face so I can keep working.
OK, OK, OK...
OK. We're all gonna be fine.
- OK, he's ready for transport. - Jackson, get him up to ICU.
- Start warming him up... - I can't, sir.
- Excuse me? - We can't leave here.
That's what Shepherd told me. There's a shooter in the hospital.
- We're supposed to... - There's a what?
- Shepherd said... - This patient is hypothermic.
Start warming him up before he starts to circle the drain.
You didn't bother to mention this until now?
- You didn't bother... - Shepherd said...
You already told me what Shepherd said!
OK...
I'll take him up myself. Everyone else, stay here.
- I'm coming. - No, you stay put.
I'm a cardiothoracic surgeon. He has a penetrating injury to his chest.
You don't get a vote this time. I'm coming. Let's go.
OK.
Her blood pressure's 90l60 and dropping. Let's hang more fluids.
- I have the portable ultrasound. - Check her appendix. I'll be back!
When are you gonna forgive me for not being a good enough lesbian for you?
When you do convince me that you're falling in love with me
and not with being in love.
When you convince me that I'm different than George O'Malley,
Erica Hahn, Mark Sloan, the girl at the coffee cart...
You have a huge heart, and I love that about you. But I don't trust you.
Why would I?
Dr. Robbins!
Her appendix...
[mouthing]
[Groans]
- You OK? - I've been hurling
every day this week, around... yep, right on schedule.
OK, we gotta get out of here, 'cause I'm not staying in here
after you stink up this place with your vomit.
Oh, my God! Meredith, get down!
- What, what? - Shh, shh!
- I... - Shh!
That's the guy from the elevator.
- What do you mean? - It's the guy from the elevator.
He asked me for directions, how to get to the chief's office.
- I don't... - Meredith,
the guy with the gun is looking for Derek.
[Retching]
Dr. Shepherd?
Sir, you shouldn't be here. It's not safe.
I know it's not safe here.
That's the point.
This hospital isn't safe.
You don't recognize me, do you?
Mr. Clark.
Sorry, I have a situation. You should go someplace safe so you don't get hurt.
I'm already hurt.
You hurt me when you decided to kill my wife.
- BP's 60lpalp. - He's losing a lot of blood.
Damn it. He needs a transfusion.
I don't know what we're gonna do.
I'll go. I'll go get it.
That's insane. I'll go.
No. I don't know what to do. You know what to do. I don't...
I can't do nothing.
Alex?
Don't die. Please don't die.
OK? It's me. It's Lexie.
I will be right back.
[Mumbling]
Hey, Sloan.
Try not to kill me.
Doing my best.
- Oh, my God. - Oh, my God.
- Mr. Clark. - Shut up. No talking.
You're not the man here.
I'm the man.
I told my wife I would be.
I'm the man.
And a man looks after his wife. But I didn't.
I let you decide that she should die.
I wasn't a man then.
But I'm a man now.
No, no, no...
Mary, Mary, see the sticky circles there?
Give me three of those.
There. And... Mary! Get me three of those, please.
And the other thingy.
Yeah.
- It's this thing? - No, not that.
The other thing with the wires.
- I'm dying. - Shh! Shh! No, you're not dying.
Don't lie to me.
Don't tell me that lie we tell everybody,
"You're fine. You're doing great."
Don't lie to me.
Please, you gotta promise to tell me the truth, OK?
You are not dying. If you were, I would tell you, OK?
OK.
OK, that's there...
[Charles grunting]
Shh! You are not dying!
Mary, hold Dr. Percy's hand, please.
Stay here.
[Gary] What kind of hospital is this?
It isn't safe here.
Somebody has to protect people. From you.
Handing down judgments like you're God.
- Mr. Clark... - You don't get to be God!
No talking!
Mr. Clark, listen to me.
I know your loss.
I lost my father.
When I was a kid.
Two guys killed my father for his watch.
Right in front of me.
I didn't become a doctor because I wanted to be God.
I became a doctor because I wanted to save lives.
Look at me.
Please.
Look at me in the eye.
I'm a human being.
I make mistakes.
I'm flawed.
We all are.
Today, I think... for you, it's just a mistake.
You want justice.
You want somebody to pay.
You're a good man. I can see that in your eyes.
Can you see it in mine?
Can you?
Dr. Shepherd! Thank God you're back!
[Mouthing]
[Meredith] I learned to read in the OR gallery.
I played in the morgue.
I colored with crayons on old ER charts.
A hospital was my church. My school.
My home. My safe place.
My sanctuary.
I love it here.
Correction: Loved it here.