Dinah!
Oh, dude. The Dinah.
Hold on.
I kind of almost fell out of my chair,
'cause I love it.
Another new word to my vocabulary.
Dinah Shore weekend is a weekend in Palm Springs
once a year.
It's almost spring break for lesbians.
A lot of partying and a lot of drinking.
Kind of like girls gone wild for gay girls.
Yeah, I've definitely been to Dinah Shore before.
No, I've never been there.
I really heard some great stories,
but I don't know that I'd ever go.
It has nothing to do with being gay or straight.
I would never attend a weekend like that.
You just want to get me in trouble
with the gay community, right?
Dinah Shore weekend's a hot mess.
It's just debauchery.
Dinah Shore is, like, a free-for-all...
Scantily-clad women everywhere.
And, you know, if clothes come off
in the meantime, then more power to 'em.
I've been going to Dinah for the last...
I can't even remember how many years.
They probably have a bronze statue of me somewhere.
Sync by honeybunny - corrected by chamallow www.Addic7ed.Com
♪ it was just the other night ♪
♪ I don't want to think about it ♪
♪ I don't want to start a fight ♪
♪ I don't want to think about it ♪
♪ every time I take a step left right ♪
♪ yeah I think I'm gonna sleep real good tonight ♪
♪ you'll find a new way to make me crazy ♪
♪ hazy ♪
Previously on The Real L Word...
And go.
I truly feel that producing L.A. Fashion this season
was my biggest accomplishment in my life.
I'm actually proud of myself.
[Cheers and applause]
Will you marry me?
I'm going to fulfill these dreams
of actually getting married and, like, build a family.
American dream, man.
I'm just trying to live it.
- I friend-requested your mom. - Let me see.
She's gonna be my friend on the Internet,
but not in real life.
Hey, mommy.
For your birthday, I don't think I could come.
My mom's just not ready to meet Stamie.
All I want to do is scream at the top of my lungs.
[Screaming]
Got you!
My mom completely caught me by surprise.
All I need is to know that you want to be part of my life as well.
Baby steps.
Nice to meet you.
Nice meeting you too.
Surprise. Boy.
I only met her for five seconds,
but I really think I have an uphill battle.
Ah!
I really do like this dress.
What's not to like?
That's it. That's the one.
My nature is just self-doubting
when it comes to making a decision.
Baby, they need to fit this to you right now.
Come in this weekend?
Yeah.
- I love you. - I love you too.
I used to break a lot of hearts,
but I'm in a relationship with someone
that I actually care about.
There's a lot of passion in our relationship.
It's good passion.
Sometimes bad passion.
Rose, relax a little bit.
Like, I know you're in a bad, bitchy mood...
You've been a heartless fucking...
I'm heartless? Whatever, okay.
"Heartless." Great. Bye, Nat.
Rose left you.
Why are we so worried about her ex?
Don't be a bitch to me in the process.
I won't! I won't!
You're just a douche, dude.
Such a hater.
I'm not the drama type.
Exes.
I'm about to have one.
I'm just more, like...
for every one girl that says "no,"
there are ten that say "yes," so fuck it.
Oh, my God!
For me, I'm being a Saint.
Why don't you just come home?
Okay.
There's an L.A. migration from San Francisco happening.
I know.
'Cause I talked to Sara today...
Is she coming to Dinah Shore with us?
Yes. [laughter]
For a moment, I actually looked at Sara as, like,
okay, when I'm ready to be in a relationship,
she's somebody I could potentially be with.
Do I like you? Yes, absolutely.
When it comes to Romi, I have no self-control.
The truth will be revealed at Dinah Shore.
Oops. [laughter]
[Dog barks]
Oh, my gosh.
What is up?
Welcome to Los Angeles.
Thank you, I have to pee.
It's fresh meat, you guys.
I know. Ooh, oh, shit.
[Indistinct chatter]
The day has come.
Sara, Julia, and Sara's cousin Lisa arrive in the uhaul.
They found an apartment near me.
It's kind of gonna be a touch-and-go situation,
because I don't know what to expect.
Hi.
Oh, my God. Look at that.
You guys are in L.A. officially.
[Sighs] We're here.
And you made it in time.
I can't wait to go with Sara to Dinah Shore this weekend.
I just know it's, like, it's gonna be off the hook.
We're ready to grab the uhaul truck
and move 'em right on in.
[Laughter]
Where are all the coffee mugs?
They're probably in the back of your car.
No.
Today, Nik and I are headed to the airport
to pick up your friend Kathlynn,
who is coming to visit us for a few days.
We have so much to do for the wedding this week,
a lot of appointments, so Kathlynn's gonna be
a good sport and join us.
So we're gonna park and go see Kathlynn, right?
- We'll go in? - Um, yeah.
- Do you have her information? - Yes.
We have to go because she's gonna be here soon.
Nikki definitely seems on edge.
I can't place it.
She's just a little bit wound up.
How long have you known her?
Kathlynn?
We were 11 years old.
Really?
My best friend.
- Let's go. - Front?
Front.
Wait. Have you not met all of them?
- I've never met Jagger. - Oh, my gosh.
I've met these two.
We were playing in the backyard.
You guys remember Michele?
Remember Michele?
That's Jagger and he loves washers and dryers,
so do you have any laundry you need him to do?
I do in my suitcase.
Hug me for me for my birthday?
I am ecstatic that my mom's out here
for my 30th birthday, but it doesn't mean too much.
She doesn't accept my life.
That, to me, is disrespectful.
I'm gonna make out with you in front of your mom today.
- No, babe. - That's my goal.
She talked to me about that.
What did she say?
She just said she's getting there, baby steps.
She's like, "as long as there's no, that, you know, PDA stuff."
I think it's just time that my mom sort of meets me halfway.
To sort of ask me to pretend that I'm not
in a relationship... especially when I'm in love
with somebody and so okay with my life...
um, that's not an option for me anymore.
I'll make a deal with your mom.
She wears flats... and I won't kiss you in public.
Her mom's like, "baby steps, baby steps."
It's like, "bitch, you're almost 60.
How many baby steps you got in you," you know what I mean?
She gets her [Indistinct].
Oh, shit, I got to go. I have to go sell a house, baby.
No, stay here. Come on.
I think the situation with her mom
being out in Los Angeles is a little more stressful for me
than I had hoped.
Tracy's mom doesn't want to meet my children.
- Michele's a surfer. - She surfs.
Come here. Let's go look at her surfboard.
Tracy's really close to my children now
and I think she wants to share that joy with her mom.
I would love for her to meet the children.
I think if she sees the whole element
of all of us together with Tracy,
I think she'll get a better understanding
of the whole picture.
Yeah, so her mom's been fun.
How's that?
She's a very, very, very nice lady.
Yes.
But it's different when you're stooping her daughter.
Yeah.
I'm amazed that she's out here and visiting
and spending time with you, because that's a first.
No, it's a nice...
It's only taken four or five years.
Yeah.
How are you doing?
Oh, it's... I'm glad I met her mom.
- It's a little stressful. - Yeah.
'Cause you don't want to put it in her face and you don't...
- Yeah. - You know?
Well, it's hard because gay people are so used to
sort of aborting their everything and kind of
putting it to the side just to make
other people comfortable.
Right. Maybe that's it.
I haven't done that so long.
That's the irony of gay people being accused
of being "in your face."
Probably that's the biggest...
like, try... having to hide it again, you know?
Yeah.
- Oh, hi. - Hide what?
Nothing.
- Hide the salami. - What are you talking about?
We're hiding the salami.
- Uh-uh. - Yeah, it's behind the couch.
You're talking about hiding your sexuality.
- Tracy? - Hmm?
We're walking on egg shells, which is exactly
what we don't want to do and I don't want my mom to do.
Who has poo-poo diaper?
Let me see.
I don't have poo-poo!
Are you sure? How about you?
Pee-pee.
You have pee-pee?
I have pee-pee.
Oh, you got me in the chin.
I want my mom to accept me the way that I am...
and accept my life...
the way that it is.
Bye, baby.
No, don't go.
Jagger, you can borrow that.
- Don't go. - You can bring it back.
Can he borrow that,
'cause he wants to spin it 5 million times?
Yeah, I'm sure he'll get...
♪ Jumping on my bed ♪
♪ one fell off and bumped his head ♪
[indistinct] Michele.
And we'll go ahead and try to get that offer
submitted so we can avoid any more issues.
I've been completely slammed at work.
Things are crazy.
Natalie started as my assistant, you know,
and she's gonna help me out with all the work that I have.
This is our sale date by plan.
- I want to cross-reference this... - With this.
Right, but I just want to make sure
that this... all this info is on here.
Okay.
Rose and I, our relationship over the past
couple of months has been pretty chaotic,
but we're finally at a place now
where things are starting to look up.
No, no, no, no.
Those aren't on this list.
You're doing it backwards.
These three aren't on here.
The opposite.
These need to be on here.
That's what I'm saying.
They're not.
So you want me to write these on here...
No, I want...
Okay, you're not getting it.
I get what you're saying.
I got it now.
Can I have my pen back?
You're going to delta
and then we'll park there.
It's five. Next left. Keep going.
Yeah?
That says "ticketing and check in."
That's not what we want.
I don't know what to tell you.
Go back around.
Baby, "P5, left lane only."
I'm wondering why Nikki is so tense
if we're going to the airport to pick up a friend.
What time does she land? Do you know?
Um, she lands now.
Look it.
Landed.
You are very timely.
Jill, you can't leave people stranded in an unfamiliar airport.
Would you leave your mother stranded
in an unfamiliar airport?
- No, I would not. - Okay.
That's exactly my point.
Oh.
I just missed her call.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
Shut... what?
I cannot wrap my head around what I'm seeing.
My mother is on the escalator.
Oh, my God!
No fucking way!
Oh!
Are you kidding me?
Kat's not coming?
Oh, my God.
[Laughter]
I know it's been really hard for Jill not having her family.
She really misses them because they're all back east.
Ooh!
So for months, I've been secretly planning
to have her mom come in and surprise her
and do wedding things with us.
You're such a pain in my ass.
What?
Hi.
I am so overblown with emotion.
I'm so happy. I'm so touched.
I can't believe my mom's here.
[Gasps] I'm so happy.
- I love you. - I love you.
You did this.
How did this happen?
Jill's reaction today was absolutely amazing,
and I love seeing her so happy.
I can't believe you did this.
I love you. I love you.
Thank you.
Keeping the secret: totally worth it.
Let's go get luggage.
Okay.
Mwah.
Ladies first.
Hi.
Tomorrow, Natalie and I are going to Dinah Shore,
which is a big deal.
Dinah's definitely a hook-up-fest
and I get crazy at Dinah.
I mean, when I go to Dinah, in the past,
I would have been with every girl you can possibly get.
Happy early anniversary.
Cheers. We made it... another month.
We made it through another month.
Damn.
This is my first time going to Dinah Shore with Rose
and I as a couple, so it'll be interesting.
I'm hoping that Rose and I can have a great time together,
but at the back of my mind, I'm a little worried.
Are you excited?
I'm, like... I'm more nervous.
Nervous about what?
You and I fighting.
We're not gonna fight.
It's like a lesbian prom.
No, it's like a "lesbians gone wild."
You promise not to be bitchy...
What do you mean?
And, like, not lose your patience
if things aren't going, like...
Babe, you're already fighting with me,
and we haven't even gotten there yet.
No, I'm not fighting with you.
We have to set rules.
Let's not make out with other people and we're fine.
That's not a good rule for you?
You want to make out with other people?
No, but that shouldn't even have to be
something we talk about.
Okay, well, I'm thinking of rules that you want to make up.
I don't know what... you're confusing me right now.
We have to be back in love quick,
so that when we go to Dinah, we can be, like, on point.
When we get home, I'll make you be back in love.
I promise.
I've never gone to Dinah with girlfriends before
and it's hard for anybody to have a relationship,
you know, with 25,000 lesbians all around you.
Dinah's definitely the test for any couple,
but definitely for Natalie and I.
Look it.
I brought all this stuff for an emergency, baby.
Look.
What potential emergency could you have?
I'm a little pms and I don't know what to wear.
I have to be prepared for these things.
A clothing emergency, babe?
Yeah, look.
So Raquel and I are packing, trying to get ready
for Palm Springs for Dinah Shore weekend.
I'm really excited to go to Dinah,
because Raquel's never been before,
so this should be interesting.
We're looking forward to having a great weekend for her birthday.
When do you want your birthday present?
My birthday present?
Tell me about it.
Undo it.
- Are you serious? - Yeah.
That's, like, my name on your body permanently.
Oh, shit.
I meant to get somebody else's name.
I've been hiding it from you this whole time.
I was in so much disbelief when she proposed to me.
Now she tattooed my name on her.
Like, that was amazing to me.
Just a really beautiful statement.
That's amazing, baby.
That means you really love me.
Is that what that...
I just did it to get laid.
I love it.
I love it. Thank you.
I don't know how to give my partner
the emotional stuff that she wants,
because I haven't developed that side of me
because of how I grew up.
And unfortunately, that's one thing
that Raquel really needs from me.
And with other girlfriends, I didn't really care,
because, you know, I didn't really see a future
or marrying anybody else I was with.
This is different.
And I'm learning.
I need to learn a lot more about myself.
You're permanently placed on me for life now.
I own you. You're mine and I'm yours.
[Chuckles]
The day has arrived and we are going to Dinah Shore weekend.
Yeah, there she is.
I have been waiting for this weekend
and now it is here.
Have fun.
- Is there gonna be drama... - No.
- When we get there? - No, no.
I'm excited.
I'm excited too.
[Laughter]
Dinah time is here.
Nat and I are ready to go.
We're gonna head out to the desert and have a good time.
All right, we're all locked up.
- Yo. - Yo.
- Hey, girl! - Hey, baby.
Hi.
Hey.
How's it going?
I have no idea which direction
the weekend's gonna go, but I'm just really excited
to see where it does go.
Yeah, let's bounce.
[Cheering]
[Laughter]
Being at Dinah is definite a risky thing to do
when your relationship isn't strong.
But when Rose and I are on good terms,
it's like nothing can stop us.
We don't do hotels.
All right, let's check it out.
Dinah!
I always rent great homes every year,
but, you know, this year we actually rented
Dinah Shore's home.
We felt pretty special in a very gay way.
This is the master bedroom, right?
Yep, look. Yeah.
This is the master bed... yes!
- Damn. - This is awesome.
It's, you know, five bedrooms, four baths,
you know, olympic-size pool.
It's a pretty sick house.
Dinah Shore.
Wow.
Dinah.
Good to see you. Hi.
Hi. And you brought mom with...
I brought my mom. This is Judy.
Hi, I'm Judy. Nice to meet you.
Hi. I'm Nik's mom.
Hi.
I'm the other bride.
Well, you want to show them your favorites?
Yes, I would love to.
I ended up not going with the dress that I saw
that day with Nik and her mom.
There was something about it that just I didn't love.
So now that I have my mom here,
I can start looking at more dresses.
That's pretty.
[Giggles]
Gorgeous.
[Giggles]
It looks really gorgeous.
- Oh, my God. - I really like this.
Versus the other one that we were loving?
I love this dress and I like it better
than the other one.
- You do? - Yes.
Wow.
The reaction I got was so far from what I expected
and so amazing.
It was just a matter of Jill...
Stop doing what you do. Just buy the dress.
What do you think, ladies?
[Laughter]
You're gorgeous.
[Laughter]
And I think that for my mom,
it was her moment of, "wow, this is real.
My daughter's getting married."
Oh, Jilly.
Do you like it?
Yes.
Oh, I'm gonna sit here.
[Giggles]
I love you. I love you too.
A lot.
You look really beautiful.
Get out of here.
Stamie and I are doing a PSA for California Onecare,
which is a grassroots movement
that advocates for universal healthcare.
It's kind of nice.
We're the first lesbian couple that's doing it.
California Onecare even covers lezzies like us.
And then we make out.
What do you think?
I like it. It works for me.
Right?
Dautry, let's get rid of this and go get fruit.
Tracy, Tracy...
- You can have one. - What?
When's your mom coming?
They would know better, 'cause I'm not sure
when they actually picked her up.
What? No.
No.
I know my mom's struggling with the idea
of meeting the kids, but I think it's, uh,
that she's not ready.
She may be here any second.
I forgot about that.
Mom hasn't met the kids yet.
Oh, I didn't.
You did it on purpose.
I thought it would be a nice...
Surprise?
I thought it would be great to bring Dautry
with Tracy and I to the PSA, 'cause I knew
Tracy's mom was coming.
I was hoping that my daughter's irresistibility
and adorableness would win over her mom.
Do you want to sit down? I'll give you a lolli...
- Hi. - Hi.
Your mommy's here.
Hey.
Dautry, let's get a lollipop, okay?
Wait, I'll finish reading that...
- Hi. - How are you?
Nice to see you. You look wonderful.
I want a lollipop.
Okay, let me get you a lollipop.
- You want to meet Dautry? - Oh, you look cute.
Thank you, she just did it. I'll introduce you.
This is Dautry.
This is one of Stamie's.
Dautry caught me by surprise,
which I told them that I don't want to, you know,
meet anybody else at this moment.
You want to say hi to my mommy?
That's my mommy.
It's just I would like to first get to know
Stamie first before I meet the whole family.
Step by step.
Slow.
Okay, ready?
Action.
Are you clear about this new federal healthcare plan?
What I read is that 20 million will still be left
uninsured and it will cau... will...
Oh, mother...
Not your mother. Not your mother.
Not your mother, but not your...
[Laughter]
Wow.
You're usually not here and I didn't mean her mother.
[Laughter]
More, like, relating to each other if you want to.
- Animated? - No.
You could, you know...
when you feel comfortable, look at each other.
That's a good lollipop?
I don't... do I look back and forth at you?
No, I think you look straight ahead.
It's grape.
Mm-hmm.
I like lollipops too.
And what is this?
- Stand by, we're rolling. - Tattoo.
[Gasps]
You have a tattoo?
Yes.
It was a party.
Oh, it was at a party.
Okay.
Action.
Are you clear about this new federal healthcare plan?
I've heard that California Onecare
is self-financing and even saves money
for families and business.
That's right and it would cover everyone from birth on.
Makes sense. That's what we need.
Yeah, it's not brain surgery.
That's actually not covered.
- Perfect. - That was a good one.
All right. Good take.
- Yay! - Dautry, good job, Dautry.
Dautry, good job.
- Yeah! - Yeah, Dautry!
Yeah, Dautry!
[Scatting]
And Natalie just called... is calling.
Oh, perfect timing.
Come on, mom.
Come on, Zory.
A-ha.
There's a space for you. Come on.
- Come on. - Aww.
Come on.
I'll Photoshop you out.
Beautiful. That's perfect.
I don't think my mom's been around
a 2 1/2 year old in a very long time,
but I think their first meeting was really sweet
and I think that it was respectful
and I'm glad it happened.
Bye-bye.
Say "bye." Say "bye."
- Bye. - Bye.
- Say, "see you later." - See you later.
She's so beautiful.
I'll keep her.
Okay.
I'm gonna keep her.
I think we have to check in.
[Cheering]
[Indistinct chatter]
We have arrived at Club Skirts in Dinah.
The energy's off the hook.
Whoa!
Let the debauchery begin.
We're here for Dinah Shore.
I have no idea what's going on with Sara,
but I want to find out, because there is pool parties,
pool parties, pool parties, night parties,
after parties.
Basically we're gonna party.
Whoo!
[Indistinct chatter]
We arrive at the Hilton and there is a sea of lesbians.
We are home.
You know, I could try to play cold fish
as long as I can possibly do it with Sara,
but eventually it always fucking comes around
to flirtation.
You know, we're caught up in the moment.
Sara looks fucking hot.
We're at Dinah. We're partying.
I'm getting caught up again.
Like, I'm getting lost in it
and I can't stop touching her.
It's inevitable, really.
[Indistinct chatter]
I feel like...
Why? What do you mean?
And that's kind of scary.
It's like, "I want this person."
Like, I don't want to just make out with you.
And I'm like, "what the fuck am I doing, dude?"
Like, "she's not even... "
Like, I kind of have a moment of realization
where it's like...
both Sara and I have, like,
the great wall of fucking China up in ourselves.
Like, we don't like being vulnerable.
We like being in control of our emotions and otherwise.
And it's basically, like, always been this battle of,
like, "who's going to break first?"
You are?
I think Sara and I are starting
to expand our relationship.
It's not just about sex with us
and we're definitely, like, learning about each other
and potentially developing trust.
And, you know, I think, like,
I feel a little vulnerable.
I'm not gonna lie.
Like, I have feelings for her
and I don't know what the truth is
and when you combine those two things,
you know...
I don't know. It's fucked up.
[Moaning]
That's our wedding planner.
- Hello, hello. - Hey.
Welcome to your home.
Yeah, I wish.
Well, for a day it will be.
We have both of our moms here.
We're gonna take them to see the wedding venue.
Very, very excited and a little nervous.
I mean, you know, mom's opinion matters.
This is my mother Judy.
Nice to meet you.
I'm Nik's mom. Hi.
Hi, Barbara. So nice to meet you.
I want them to love it.
I hope that they both have the same reaction
that Nik and I had when we drove up.
- This is so... - Spectacular space.
Isn't it gorgeous?
Why would you ever want to leave?
Oh, perfect, right?
I think it'll work.
[Chuckles] Breathtaking.
Oh, my goodness.
My mom was in awe of the surroundings.
I mean, it's a beautiful view.
She was blown away.
This is beyond...
This is beyond, beyond.
- This is beyond belief. - Yeah.
This has been one of the best days ever.
Ever. I'm proud of you.
And I love you.
I am elated to share this experience with her.
My mother is my best friend.
As much as I want for myself to have her by my side,
I also want her to have these moments.
You know, I'm her only daughter,
and I'm planning my wedding,
and this only happens once.
I love, love, love doing things with Nik and her mom,
and you know, it's special.
But, like, every time I'm with them
I'm always missing you so much.
- And it's hard. - I know, I know.
And it didn't feel like...
it just didn't feel...
I don't know, complete.
And if... to have you not be a part of it
would've been... would've killed me.
And I'm so happy you're here.
- I love you. - [whimpers]
Aw, this is the best.
I mean, I really missed being where I should be.
It didn't have to go this well.
And the fact that you embrace her like family
means everything to me.
She's our family, you're family,
and everything you're doing is beautiful.
I'm very, very, very, very glad you're happy.
Really, that's all we ever wanted
was for you to be happy.
It's very meaningful to hear my mother
talk about how happy she is for me
because when I told my parents
about my relationship with Nik,
my parents said things like,
"that's not the life that we thought you might live."
It means so much more to me that I have their blessing.
[Giggles]
[Laughing]
Nice.
Do you wanna do invitations?
Both: [laughing]
Hi, how are you?
Thank you.
We're gonna go out to Dinah for a day.
It's definitely not our speed as a couple,
something we would normally do.
We're not those type of lesbians.
I see a lot of board shorts.
But where are they? Where are the lesbians?
Baby, there's lesbians here.
Lot quieter than I expected.
Stay tuned.
I think they're at the party, right?
It's too early, it's not even 9:00 yet.
And basically Dinah Shore is a huge opportunity
for us to all kick back
and basically make fun of a lot of bad haircuts,
a lot of bad clothes,
and a lot of mismatched relationships.
My tranny's friend said that there's, like, lots of hot ones.
Let me ask you again, how the fuck would
your tranny friend know anything about Dinah Shore weekend?
He told me.
Like, "girl, they lots of hot ones there."
And I was like, "really?"
He's like, "girl, they like gisele walking around."
The only hot one that you should be interested in
right now is this one.
[Club music]
♪ ♪
I like when you do that.
You look fucking sexy.
Tonight's the white diamonds party at Dinah.
It's a White Party and you gotta wear white dresses.
For me and my friends, the White Party...
that's usually the start of our weekend.
You know, get caught up in the moment,
drink some drinks, and dance, and have a good time.
- Wait, is it paint? - Yeah.
You always expect to see a little funkiness at Dinah.
People just kinda leave their inhibitions in L.A. or Arkansas,
wherever the fuck they're from.
[Club music plays]
♪ ♪
I really don't know what is going on with Rose.
Rose is acting like she's single,
kind of like she came alone to the party.
It's kind of one of those things where
I could have made it an issue, but I chose not to.
[Laughing] I love it.
Tracy didn't wanna have a big party at a bar for her 30th birthday.
Since it's such a big birthday,
she wanted to invite her closest friends
to an intimate dinner at her aunt's house.
Excuse me, let me come in here and get that...
- [Laughing] - Paper from you guys.
I'm ready to have Tracy back full-time.
This trip with Zory has been an experience
and very memorable.
And there's been smiles, and there's been tears.
But I'm ready for her to pack her bags up and go back home.
[Tapping on glass] No, that's yours.
Tracy, we all love you.
That's why we're here.
Mwah, happy birthday.
All: Cheers. [glasses clinking]
- Skinny asses. - All: Skinny asses.
[Laughing]
I was overwhelmed and just so happy
to see my closest friends and family come.
This is the 30th birthday party that I want.
[Cheers and applause]
[Laughing]
I wanted to give Stamie the biggest kiss.
And knowing that I can't do that
till my mom goes back to Jersey,
it really sucks.
[Guitar plays]
♪ I'm ♪
♪ replaying ♪
♪ conversations ♪
♪ I'm dying to change ♪
♪ 'cause you've got me ♪
♪ in the palm of your hand ♪
♪ ♪
I guess I'm the one that has to change.
I know that she needed my support.
And it's hard.
It's not easy.
But I wanna be strong.
♪ On the border ♪
♪ never getting closer ♪
Being there with my friends and family,
I realize that this whole thing,
it's not about choosing Stamie or mom,
it's choosing me.
You know?
That was the moment where I had to realize
I had to choose me.
[Sniffs]
♪ But it's time, I know it is ♪
♪ I gotta let it go ♪
♪ gotta let it go ♪
♪ ♪
[cheers and applause] Bravo, bravo!
Nice, nice!
Man, you're good.
- Oh, hi. - Hi.
[Indistinct]
Hey, don't you dare look at my girl like that.
I'll fucking stab your leg.
Tonight was the white diamonds party.
And Rose and I kind of didn't start off on the right foot.
I wasn't sure if Rose and I were gonna be able
to make it through the night.
But I ended up having a good time.
I think that she eventually remembered that she had a girlfriend.
You guys can hang out and party,
we're gonna go read stories to each other.
If there was any one girl that I would ever want,
Natalie fit all those boxes of what's on my list.
I just think it's a matter of me growing the fuck up.
- I love you. - I know, Rose.
Raquel's never been to Dinah before.
I cannot let her come all the way to Palm Springs
and not experience at least five minutes of this pool party.
Holy fuck!
Wowser.
Who knew that the desert would be
the natural habitat of lesbians?
Which is kind of cool.
They migrate once a year to the same place
to feed, to mate, to congregate.
People are taking their fucking clothes off,
this shit is crazy!
This has been what I've been missing all my gay years.
It's quite a, like, voyeuristic experience.
You know, I saw these, like, two 40-year-old chicks,
like, all mauling each other, it was like...
like, and that's great, good for them.
Fucking celebrating your lives, man.
I think it's awesome.
It's just not for me.
Hey, Dinah!
My favorite part about Dinah e the pool parties.
That's, like, where you have the best time.
You're running around in a bathing suit and you meet people.
- Hey, happy Dinah. - Happy Dinah.
It's, like, crack and, like, crazy packed.
Girls everywhere.
I've never seen a Saturday pool party,
like, on full throttle that way.
Babe, come on.
I'm just saying hi to everybody, okay?
- Two seconds, babe. - Hurry up.
Corbie!
What up, bitch?
I'm just gonna say hi, dude. What the fuck?
Oh, my God, oh, my... ugh!
When did she get my attitude? That's crazy.
- That's rude, man. - Jesus.
I know, in a bit, in a bit.
- Rose, just... - I'm not gonna do this...
Babe, we don't have to wait in line.
No, but the way you spoke to me
when you were saying hi to your friends...
- Okay, babe... - I don't do that shit.
I'm sorry. All I did was say...
I'm sorry, I don't even wanna fight about it.
- I'm sorry. - Okay.
Wasn't even ten minutes into the party,
and I'm like, "what the fuck is going on?"
I'm completely shocked.
Like, wow, I can't believe we just fought again.
Why are we fighting?
Because you don't do that to me when I'm saying...
Okay, I'm sorry, but she's walking us
to the bathroom in the room.
She can wait a second while I say hi to them.
You wanna go now, or not? I'm just asking.
I'm gonna take a walk over there,
and I'll be back. I need a minute.
You can go.
It's day two.
Things are definitely getting
a little bit more comfortable between Sara and I.
You know, we're holding hands, we're making out more,
[sigh] It's nice, I'm not gonna lie.
My plan initially was to come to Dinah Shore
and whatever happens, happens.
At this point... [sigh]
I'm not gonna lie, like, I'm kinda only eyes only on Sara.
Ah!
What the fuck?
Sara runs up to Romi and starts humping her leg.
So I'm confused. What's going on?
Did I miss something?
- And throw up? - Yeah.
Recently, me and Sara have been talking on Facebook,
and it kind of started off like we knew about each other.
And so I was just like, "I know about you.
"I don't wanna, like, have anything bad with you,
you're gonna be here,
you're friends with all my friends."
There was something about Romi that made me feel like...
we would be good friends for some reason.
Aside of the whole Whitney situation.
Like, it just seemed like someone
that I would probably hang out with.
She's like, "don't tell Whit that we're talking."
She's like, "let's just save it and surprise her at Dinah."
Like, I was online one night and she was there.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah... - No.
But it was never, like, bad towards you ever.
And we both were just like...
"There's not gonna be any weirdness, like, it's fine."
Gotta love the fucking Internet.
Apparently Sara and Romi know each other.
So the irony is just pouring over.
Ah-ha!
Rose!
You really wanna throw out...
No, but you wanted to be rude to me?
No, Rose.
You wanna talk about this for a second?
'Cause I wanna tell you what I wanna have a talk about.
The next time I'm saying hi to my friends
and you're doing the same... I get it!
I didn't do anything wrong, dude.
I'm saying hi and giving Irene a hug.
And you're yelling at me to use a bathroom
that's not gonna pick up and remove itself in five minutes.
- I didn't mean to yell. - But you did.
I was just saying let's go to the bathroom, that's it.
Now at this point I've already apologized to you,
I've already said I'm sorry.
You said you needed a minute, you took your minute.
Right now when I turned around, you were walking away.
- So at this point now... - You're gonna bounce?
No, you're already bouncing.
What do you wanna do then?
- Drop it. - Then step up.
- Don't talk to me like that. - No, no, step up? Rose.
I think Rose kind of wants to fight,
kind of wants to go off her own way.
So she will take anything and run with it.
Right, but the thing is you get caught up
in other people's dreams, and now you're all...
- Hello... - Hey, babies!
I left her alone for the rest of the day,
and just went ahead and had fun with Whitney.
Where's the... where's your other friend, the...
Fuck her. Hey, Whitney.
I'm gonna make her do it. Go, Whitney.
Hey, Rose, get in on this, baby.
How do I do this?
Take it! [cheers]
Go! Oh!
Because Rose and I aren't hanging out,
I go and I find my best friend, Marlow,
and we kind of just had a good time.
I kind of felt like I was more reserved and more chill.
I mean, I was kind of being on my best behavior.
And Nat's like, you know, grinding on people,
and acting all crazy, and stuff.
So for me, it was just kind of like,
mm, you do your thing, I do my thing,
and we'll see what happens.
Are you in charge of her?
- Hey. - What's up?
I remember you from last night.
- No? - No.
- That's a different Deb. - No, don't do that.
- Don't do that. - You don't have to...
You're being dumb, you already know what you did.
- What did I... - I didn't do shit today.
Okay, but you know what?
I've already apologized to you, like, over and over.
- So we're done. - You wanna be done?
You wanna be done? Really?
- Yeah, don't threaten me. - That's not a threat.
Do you really wanna be done?
Whatever.
What's her problem?
She's a dumb bitch, dude.
You just fucked up.
Go be a Deb, fool. You okay?
- No, I'm about to be. - What?
So at this point, I'm not worried about
where Nat's at or what she's doing.
Let's go. Liz, let's go.
Liz!
I wanna be able to just end the feud and end the drama
by leaving her at the party.
- Hey, Dinah. - Hey, Dinah.
Wow.
There it is.
Sara is making out with Romi in the pool.
So that means time for me to go.
I like to pride myself on not needing anybody.
Like, I don't need anybody.
I like to think I don't need anybody.
[Phone ringing]
- Hello? - Hey.
Hey.
What's up, mama?
I came back here thinking about you.
You know, that I wish I could be there to support you.
And know that I like all your friends.
That was very, very cool.
Very good, good people.
I know, I know.
You can count on me for anything.
But I wanted to say, you know,
that I'm no one to judge anybody,
and nobody's perfect.
- Good friends. - That's cute.
And... and you're not doing anything wrong.
There's nothing wrong.
No, it's not.
What happened? Did you...
What did you do? Are you drinking?
[Laughing]
A lot of times, I have to guess and sort of assume,
and I'm like, "mom's supportive."
But to actually hear it, it's a whole other thing.
It's exactly what I thought I never needed,
but I definitely need.
I know, mommy.
It means a lot that you came out here.
And it means a lot that you're saying that.
- Well, Stamie says hi, too. - Hi, Zory.
- Hey, hello. - Hello, hey.
- How are you? - How are you?
[Indistinct] Oh, aw!
- Ah! - [laughing]
- That's cute. - Oh, my gosh.
Her mom has definitely come a long way.
I mean, she's really stepped up to the plate,
and I think Tracy needed that.
One day she's gonna accept my friend request.
And that's when the deal is gonna be closed.
She's cute.
Yeah, I know.
She's a keeper. You're a keeper, mama.
[Laughing]
I feel a lot closer to my mom.
It's like we're a team again.
I'm still me, I'm still her little girl,
I still do wear heels, but I might also wear some boots.
I'm still the same person.
Being gay doesn't change who I am.
Okay, love you, sweetie.
- I love you too, mom. - Bye-bye.
- Bye. - Bye.
I think she's getting it.
I think I'm getting through to her.
- Look at your mommy. - I know, right?
She's so cute. Uh!
- That was really cute. - That was sweet.
Mwah!
Dude, I had kind of a really weird time.
Yeah.
Oh, Nat and I are, like, taking a break.
I just gotta get more money, like I'm a fucking atm disposal.
[Door opens, closes]
Oh, when'd you get here?
[Chuckles] Okay.
How about your sister's calling me?
I'm, like, livid. I'm heated.
I'm... I think I've finally reached that point
where I... like, I don't wanna be left anymore.
You're taking all your stuff?
- You're leaving? - Yeah.
- Are you going where? - Don't worry about it.
Nat's packing up,
and a part of me does want her to leave,
and a part of me doesn't want her to leave.
I think for me, it's more like,
you caused all this, what the fuck? Why are you leaving?
You should be apologizing to me and saying,
"sorry, you know, I walked into the pool party drama."
Did you take my money?
Okay.
Well, you took all my drink tickets.
I just... I just needed something to write...
'cause I do work for you, you don't pay me, so.
Oh, I don't pay you,
but I don't spend more than what you make
- on your fucking clothes? - Rose, Rose.
I'm not taking any of your stuff.
You're all good.
I don't want your fucking money, I could care less.
Like, I'm not here for your money,
I could be broke with you.
Like, I'm here because we're supposed to be in love.
- Do you wanna talk or no? - No.
Why are you slamming shit, dude?
- I'm just trying to get... - You're being drama.
I'm just trying to get out really quick.
Okay, I'm gonna need help with something in the bathroom,
but I'm gonna get dressed. Are you getting dressed?
Are we leaving together?
So we're getting ready to go out.
And for me, getting ready to go out is always like, you know,
10 to 15 minute preparation.
So lo and behold, of course,
I'm waiting on Raquel, as always.
And I go into the bathroom to see what's taking her so long,
and she is putting on a corset, thigh-high, like,
you know, stockings, heels.
I'm like blown away.
This reminds me of a typical night going out
when we were... when you were 21 and I was 23 when we dated.
- Right? - Yeah.
This is what that reminds me of for sure.
- Doesn't it? - Yeah.
As tight as it'll go. As tight as it goes.
And this bitch wants this corset so tight
that her tits are up to, like, her chin basically.
It's pretty much nuts.
But God, she looks so fucking hot.
Huh, how'd I get so lucky?
I will definitely be having sex tonight at this point,
because my girlfriend's so smoking.
That the chances are it might take me an hour
to get her out of this corset,
but I'm totally cool with that.
Ah. That's my... ow.
Ah! [laughing]
- Can you stop for a second? - No, I can't, no.
I don't wanna... I don't wanna stop right now.
You and I don't have to do drama.
Are you kidding me? You are so drama.
You got mad 'cause I saw Irene.
- You think I got mad? - Why'd you get mad though?
I... because it wasn't about you.
- I had to go to the bathroom. - Big deal.
You... no, no, you made it a fucking big deal.
'Cause your girlfriend...
'cause you're fucking girlfriend has to go pee.
Why'd you just pull my fucking hair?
I don't wanna talk to you, I don't wanna look at you,
get the fuck away.
- When do you get it? - When do I get what?
When do you get the fact that you're a fucking straight-up bitch?
[Soft moan]
[Panting]
Don't... don't... Rose, don't fucking...
- Stop being weird. - Rose.
- Stop being... - Rose!
Leave me the fuck alone!
[Panting]
You know what, I've been so fucking patient
with your bitch-ass. What the fuck do you want?
Not me, baby. I'm done.
[Soft grunt]
It's early!
- Mom? - Yeah, baby?
You can't go.
This week has been a total whirlwind.
It was amazing to have my mom here.
Everything that I would've wanted to do
with wedding planning came true for me.
[Woodpecker pecking]
There is really a woodpecker.
- There's a woodpecker. - Like, a real one.
I'm devastated to see her go.
I mean, it's so easy having her here.
You know, it's... it's my best friend.
And I would keep her here in a heartbeat if I could.
- It was so wonderful. - We did so much.
I can't even remember what we did.
Stop that.
My mom is a tremendous emotional support to me.
We are very, very close.
You have no idea how much I love you and I miss you.
- Yes, I do. - You do?
- Yeah. - Oh, good.
I'll speak to you soon. I love you.
Take good care. Be safe.
Thank you for this.
I'll call you when I get there.
I can move forward in my planning process
right now because I feel like I shared
a really important piece of it with my mom.
I love you.
And I'm really touched that Nicole did this for me.
Hey. Are you okay?
- Are you gonna cry? - No.
Maybe. [chuckles]
Baby, I love you.
Thank you.
It was a nice time.
The lesbians are leaving.
They're migrating back to where they've come from.
It's really interesting.
Some of them don't make it. I don't know.
Baby, I got my own stuff.
I'm very impressed.
[Giggles]
Put all that shit in there, yeah?
Look at all... [laughing]
I know, those are dirty clothes.
Natalie took off and went home.
And so now I know the relationship is over.
You know, was I the best girlfriend ever?
No, but I've been the best girlfriend,
out of my 35 years, to her.
Aw, look.
I miss her.
[Laughing]
It is what it is, you know?
I mean, it was a work in progress.
But...
now that it's over, um...
you know, it'll be someone else's happiness.
My plan is not to be with Rose.
She's so mean.
She threw so many low blows at me this weekend.
Like, so... I'm just thinking back
to the way she speaks to me,
and I just can't believe I deal with it.
I just fucking hit a breaking point.
Me driving away was probably
the best feeling I've had all weekend.
I'm not gonna be her fucking punching bag anymore.
I'm a great person, and she missed out.
I don't think she'll mind too much.
'Cause for one that won't, there's ten that will, right?
I think Dinah just solidifies
the position that Sara and I are both in,
that we're not ready to be in a relationship.
Bye. Thank you.
Bye.
Let me know... [talking indistinctly]
But you know what? Fuck it.
I am single as hell.
So ladies...
Watch out.
♪ Hello plan ♪
♪ let me know what is on the line ♪
♪ words I could not find ♪
♪ been there all the time ♪
♪ but now I clearly see ♪
♪ as I crumble down ♪
♪ ♪
♪ came back just to say good-bye ♪
♪ don't say good-bye ♪
♪ you came back just to say good-bye ♪
♪ don't say good-bye ♪
♪ makes me ♪
♪ wanna cry ♪
♪ makes me ♪
♪ wanna cry ♪
♪ 'cause I just want ♪
♪ you to stay ♪
♪ I just want ♪
♪ you to stay ♪
♪ and I just want ♪
♪ you to stay ♪
♪ I just want ♪
♪ you to stay ♪
♪ ♪
sync by honeybunny - corrected by chamallow www.Addic7ed.Com
Yeah.
[Giggles]