1
00:00:01,770 --> 00:00:04,739
Okay. I'm getting all the games
ready for the baby shower.
2
00:00:04,773 --> 00:00:06,908
(gasps) and luckily
great-aunt Kathy died,
3
00:00:06,942 --> 00:00:09,944
So now the teams are even.
Do we really have to play silly games?
4
00:00:09,979 --> 00:00:13,881
I mean, isn't it enough
that the shower is a celebration
5
00:00:13,916 --> 00:00:17,251
Of the new life growing
inside of me? No.
6
00:00:17,286 --> 00:00:19,420
Since my mom's coming to town
for the shower,
7
00:00:19,455 --> 00:00:21,923
We're all having dinner
at our place tomorrow night.
8
00:00:21,957 --> 00:00:24,425
You guys wanna come?
She's bringing fresh goat milk.
9
00:00:24,460 --> 00:00:27,428
Oh. Thank God. That canned milk
never tastes goat-y enough.
10
00:00:27,463 --> 00:00:29,830
And she hates all
of Casey's girlfriends.
11
00:00:29,848 --> 00:00:32,333
I think she just doesn't
like to share me,
12
00:00:32,384 --> 00:00:34,335
Wants all my attention on her.
13
00:00:34,370 --> 00:00:37,338
That's why I wasn't allowed
to have dogs... Or toys.
14
00:00:37,373 --> 00:00:40,358
You don't have to worry about
your mom not liking Mia.
15
00:00:40,359 --> 00:00:43,444
(chuckles) I don't know what
it is, but moms always love Mia.
16
00:00:43,479 --> 00:00:44,946
She's like Pierce Brosnan.
17
00:00:44,980 --> 00:00:47,848
Mm. Yeah.
I am a professional, okay?
18
00:00:47,866 --> 00:00:50,852
I will make her like me.
(chuckles) it's okay if she doesn't.
19
00:00:50,886 --> 00:00:53,237
Are you doubting me?
20
00:00:53,288 --> 00:00:55,256
Because Maddie was
being modest before.
21
00:00:55,290 --> 00:00:57,392
I'm not Pierce Brosnan.
I'm Richard Gere.
22
00:00:57,426 --> 00:01:00,194
(mouths word)
well, it can't go any worse
23
00:01:00,229 --> 00:01:02,797
Than when Ben met mom and dad
for the first time.
24
00:01:02,831 --> 00:01:04,799
Hey.
Now that I'm all clean,
25
00:01:04,833 --> 00:01:07,301
How about we get a little...
(whispers) dirty? (chuckles)
26
00:01:07,336 --> 00:01:10,705
(normal voice) when are your
parents supposed to get here?
27
00:01:10,739 --> 00:01:12,240
Five... Minutes ago.
28
00:01:16,645 --> 00:01:18,379
Hi.
29
00:01:18,414 --> 00:01:20,782
(both) hi.
30
00:01:29,992 --> 00:01:33,394
(man)
♪ I don't know where I'd be ♪
31
00:01:33,429 --> 00:01:36,914
♪ without someone to see ♪
32
00:01:36,949 --> 00:01:40,284
♪ this thing through ♪
33
00:01:40,335 --> 00:01:43,171
♪ I am such aess ♪
34
00:01:43,205 --> 00:01:46,607
♪ even at my best ♪
35
00:01:46,642 --> 00:01:49,961
Sync by n17t01
www.addic7ed.com
36
00:01:50,012 --> 00:01:52,180
Look what I found, Mia.
37
00:01:52,214 --> 00:01:55,583
Oh. (chuckles) it's the little onesie
your Nana gave you when you were a baby.
38
00:01:55,617 --> 00:01:58,119
(Chuckles) ohh. "I heart my Nana.
" (chuckles) ohh.
39
00:01:58,153 --> 00:02:00,271
Oh, I can't believe
40
00:02:00,305 --> 00:02:02,106
I am finally going
to be called "Nana."
41
00:02:02,141 --> 00:02:04,592
It's a tradition in my family.
42
00:02:04,626 --> 00:02:07,095
I'm hoping to break
my family tradition
43
00:02:07,129 --> 00:02:10,331
Of being called
"pee-paw" or "poo-pa."
44
00:02:10,365 --> 00:02:14,102
We sound like
a bunch of filthy bears.
45
00:02:14,136 --> 00:02:15,787
(knock on door)
46
00:02:15,821 --> 00:02:18,539
(yelling) that's my mom!
47
00:02:18,574 --> 00:02:20,541
(imitates drum beats
and cymbal crash)
48
00:02:20,576 --> 00:02:23,044
Mom!
Baby!
49
00:02:23,078 --> 00:02:26,848
Mm! Yeah!
Oh! Oh! Oh, my goodness!
50
00:02:26,882 --> 00:02:31,886
Wow. Returning astronauts
don't get that kind of welcome.
51
00:02:31,920 --> 00:02:33,888
I hugged mom like that once,
52
00:02:33,922 --> 00:02:35,907
And she called me a lesbian.
53
00:02:35,941 --> 00:02:38,626
Everyone, this is my mom Ariel.
Hi.
54
00:02:38,660 --> 00:02:40,294
(Maddie) hello.
Hi.
55
00:02:40,329 --> 00:02:41,762
Hello, all.
56
00:02:41,797 --> 00:02:45,483
I brought everyone goat milk,
fresh from Rebecca's teats.
57
00:02:47,302 --> 00:02:50,238
It's still warm!
This is Vicky... Joel...
58
00:02:50,272 --> 00:02:52,907
Hi.
Hello. Hi.
59
00:02:52,925 --> 00:02:54,976
Maddie... And Ben...
(both) hi.
60
00:02:55,010 --> 00:02:57,795
And this... Is Mia. (chuckles) oh.
Hi, Mrs. Avenport.
61
00:02:57,846 --> 00:03:01,082
It's so nice to meet you.
I've heard so much about you.
62
00:03:01,116 --> 00:03:05,386
So you're the woman who stole my little Casey away.
Oh, I am. (chuckles)
63
00:03:05,420 --> 00:03:08,506
And I'm about to steal that
scarf, 'cause I love it so much.
64
00:03:08,557 --> 00:03:09,957
(laughs)
65
00:03:09,975 --> 00:03:11,459
Oh, thank you.
66
00:03:11,493 --> 00:03:15,279
And good for you,
wearing so much jewelry.
67
00:03:15,314 --> 00:03:16,797
Thank you?
(chuckles nervously)
68
00:03:16,832 --> 00:03:19,333
Uh, so how was the drive down?
69
00:03:19,368 --> 00:03:21,936
Sorry, I didn't hear you
70
00:03:21,970 --> 00:03:25,239
With all that jewelry
rattling around.
71
00:03:25,274 --> 00:03:28,476
Oh, so I understand that
you're in the porn industry.
72
00:03:28,510 --> 00:03:29,944
Uh, no.
73
00:03:29,978 --> 00:03:32,413
I-I run an online
party invitation service.
74
00:03:32,447 --> 00:03:35,183
Oh. Call girls, escorts,
party invitation service...
75
00:03:35,217 --> 00:03:38,052
I really can't keep up
with the new lingo. (chuckles)
76
00:03:38,086 --> 00:03:40,688
(chuckles) no.
My business is nothing like...
77
00:03:40,722 --> 00:03:43,374
Rattle, rattle, rattle.
So many bracelets.
78
00:03:43,408 --> 00:03:44,859
Two.
79
00:03:44,893 --> 00:03:46,961
I'm wearing two bracelets.
80
00:03:46,995 --> 00:03:48,946
So, Joel,
81
00:03:48,981 --> 00:03:51,732
I see where your daughters
get their good looks.
82
00:03:51,767 --> 00:03:53,684
(laughs) oh...
83
00:03:53,719 --> 00:03:55,236
Well...
84
00:03:55,270 --> 00:03:57,305
It's very nice to meet you.
85
00:03:57,339 --> 00:03:58,940
Thank you. You, too.
86
00:03:58,974 --> 00:04:01,309
Oh.
Your hands are so soft.
87
00:04:01,343 --> 00:04:04,412
Thank you. I inseminated
a cow yesterday.
88
00:04:06,548 --> 00:04:09,784
Oh. So, honey, what time
are you leaving tomorrow?
89
00:04:09,818 --> 00:04:12,653
Early. Since it's no guys
allowed at the baby shower,
90
00:04:12,688 --> 00:04:14,822
I'm gonna road trip
up to Vermont,
91
00:04:14,856 --> 00:04:16,791
Get a bunch of old stuff
out of storage.
92
00:04:16,825 --> 00:04:19,727
Did you ask him yet? Well, you can't
just ask someone, "hey, can I come
93
00:04:19,761 --> 00:04:22,663
"on your road trip, and we can
have guy bonding and make
94
00:04:22,698 --> 00:04:25,533
"really cool memories, and then
years from now we can just look
95
00:04:25,567 --> 00:04:28,402
"at each other and do that smirk
that guys do, where you both
96
00:04:28,437 --> 00:04:31,672
"know we're thinking about that
great road trip we had, but we
97
00:04:31,707 --> 00:04:34,892
Can't talk about it because the girls are in the room?
" I think there might be a shorter way to ask.
98
00:04:34,927 --> 00:04:38,329
Hey, Ben. You wanna drive
up to Vermont with me?
99
00:04:38,380 --> 00:04:39,764
Uh, y-yeah, yeah.
100
00:04:39,798 --> 00:04:42,733
I mean, cool. Whatevs.
101
00:04:42,768 --> 00:04:44,885
Did you just say "whatevs"?
102
00:04:44,920 --> 00:04:47,755
If you can think
of a cooler way to say it,
103
00:04:47,789 --> 00:04:50,391
I'd like to hear it.
104
00:04:52,294 --> 00:04:54,528
Oh, hey.
Where you been all morning?
105
00:04:54,563 --> 00:04:57,481
Making...
106
00:04:57,516 --> 00:05:00,268
These.
107
00:05:00,302 --> 00:05:02,403
"brawhd trip."
108
00:05:02,437 --> 00:05:03,804
What does that mean?
109
00:05:03,839 --> 00:05:06,207
No. It's "bro" and "road."
it's "bro'd trip."
110
00:05:06,241 --> 00:05:08,593
Oh, no, no. We've talked
about you combining words.
111
00:05:08,627 --> 00:05:10,978
You're not good at it.
You need to stop.
112
00:05:10,996 --> 00:05:14,415
Bro'd trip?
That's worse than "hesort."
113
00:05:14,449 --> 00:05:16,801
Hey. People are screaming
for a shorter way
114
00:05:16,835 --> 00:05:19,487
To say "hotel resort."
115
00:05:19,521 --> 00:05:21,722
Okay. I'll stop.
116
00:05:21,757 --> 00:05:23,641
Why is this road trip
so important to you?
117
00:05:23,675 --> 00:05:25,660
Well, I need a new rich Vernon.
118
00:05:25,694 --> 00:05:28,963
Who's rich Vernon?
You remember rich Vernon from work?
119
00:05:28,997 --> 00:05:32,249
We used to go out and pretend
to like whiskey together.
120
00:05:32,284 --> 00:05:34,218
We used to hang out
all the time,
121
00:05:34,252 --> 00:05:37,171
But then two months ago
he got transferred to Japan,
122
00:05:37,205 --> 00:05:40,107
And, yeah, I mean, we still play
online scrabble sometimes,
123
00:05:40,142 --> 00:05:43,444
But I have to get up really early.
Oh. Is that what you were doing?
124
00:05:43,478 --> 00:05:45,946
I thought you were having
an online affair.
125
00:05:45,981 --> 00:05:48,316
You thought
I was having an affair,
126
00:05:48,350 --> 00:05:50,351
And you didn't say anything?
127
00:05:50,385 --> 00:05:52,787
Like you said,
it was really early.
128
00:05:55,490 --> 00:05:57,391
Casey would be
the perfect friend.
129
00:05:57,426 --> 00:06:00,361
I mean, we're basically family,
so I see him all the time.
130
00:06:00,395 --> 00:06:02,930
Plus he's younger than me.
He's in a band.
131
00:06:02,964 --> 00:06:04,899
He's just...
He's cool, you know?
132
00:06:04,933 --> 00:06:07,768
And if your friend is cool,
that makes you cool, too.
133
00:06:07,803 --> 00:06:10,538
Aw. Ben, you don't need
Casey to be cool.
134
00:06:10,572 --> 00:06:12,907
Maddie,
I wake up at 4:00 A.M.
135
00:06:12,941 --> 00:06:14,709
To play online scrabble.
136
00:06:14,743 --> 00:06:16,177
I know.
137
00:06:16,211 --> 00:06:18,579
I kinda wish
you were having an affair.
138
00:06:18,613 --> 00:06:20,681
(door opens) hey!
139
00:06:20,716 --> 00:06:22,149
Hi.
140
00:06:22,167 --> 00:06:25,152
You ready for our road trip?
I sure am. (chuckles)
141
00:06:25,187 --> 00:06:28,622
What? Uh, Joel's coming with us.
I-I invited him, too.
142
00:06:28,657 --> 00:06:30,041
"broad trip"?
143
00:06:30,092 --> 00:06:31,525
What is this, Maddie?
144
00:06:31,560 --> 00:06:34,895
You going on a road trip
with all your girlfriends?
145
00:06:34,930 --> 00:06:37,798
Hey, babe. You sure you're gonna
be all right with my mom?
146
00:06:37,833 --> 00:06:40,000
I-I don't have
to do this today.
147
00:06:40,035 --> 00:06:43,270
I don't think it went that bad
with your mom yesterday.
148
00:06:43,305 --> 00:06:46,374
Be honest. The reviews weren't great.
Well, don't you worry,
149
00:06:46,408 --> 00:06:49,143
Because I'm really gonna
turn it on today, okay?
150
00:06:49,177 --> 00:06:51,078
Took off
all my noisy bracelets.
151
00:06:51,113 --> 00:06:53,547
I'm not wearing any
fancy big-city deodorant.
152
00:06:53,582 --> 00:06:56,484
Oh! And watch this. I learned
how to drink goat milk
153
00:06:56,518 --> 00:06:58,452
Without making an icky face.
154
00:07:04,593 --> 00:07:06,994
(strained voice)
I don't think Rebecca's well.
155
00:07:08,597 --> 00:07:12,366
Don't worry about Mr. Putney
bringing us down, okay?
156
00:07:12,401 --> 00:07:15,302
We can still do all the awesome
road trip stuff we wanted to do.
157
00:07:15,337 --> 00:07:18,939
We'll just do it with
the old guy napping in the back.
158
00:07:18,973 --> 00:07:22,076
All right. Let me just
get it out there.
159
00:07:22,110 --> 00:07:24,111
Nothing gets back
to the ladies.
160
00:07:24,146 --> 00:07:25,913
Oh. Of course not.
161
00:07:25,947 --> 00:07:28,265
Because Vicky can never
know about this.
162
00:07:28,300 --> 00:07:29,717
(bag thuds)
163
00:07:29,751 --> 00:07:31,152
Vegetable juice?
164
00:07:31,186 --> 00:07:33,521
Your wife can't know
you're getting
165
00:07:33,555 --> 00:07:36,373
Eight essential vitamins
and minerals?
166
00:07:36,425 --> 00:07:39,293
Ever since I hit 50,
Vicky has been all over me
167
00:07:39,311 --> 00:07:40,795
About what I eat.
168
00:07:40,829 --> 00:07:42,747
I'm on
a highly restricted diet.
169
00:07:42,781 --> 00:07:44,765
No salt of any kind.
170
00:07:44,800 --> 00:07:46,951
So now I do have salt,
171
00:07:47,002 --> 00:07:48,969
It makes me go crazy.
172
00:07:49,004 --> 00:07:53,307
Like...
"kill a drifter" crazy or...
173
00:07:54,709 --> 00:07:57,144
I only allow myself
one binge a year.
174
00:07:57,179 --> 00:08:00,714
I go on a road trip,
and regular Joel...
175
00:08:00,748 --> 00:08:02,216
Turns into road Joel.
176
00:08:04,102 --> 00:08:06,620
Guess what, bros?
177
00:08:06,655 --> 00:08:09,023
It's about to get salty.
178
00:08:09,057 --> 00:08:10,524
(clank)
179
00:08:10,559 --> 00:08:12,059
(can pops)
180
00:08:14,896 --> 00:08:17,764
Maddie, I figured out
the perfect way
181
00:08:17,783 --> 00:08:20,935
To win over Casey's mom.
I am going into "yes" mode.
182
00:08:20,969 --> 00:08:24,371
You know, when you have a crush
on a guy and you want him
183
00:08:24,406 --> 00:08:28,159
To like you, so you say yes to everything he asks for?
Yeah, you always regret it the next morning,
184
00:08:28,210 --> 00:08:31,378
But it does work.
It does. (chuckles) hi.
185
00:08:31,413 --> 00:08:33,881
This must be so exciting
for you, Vicky.
186
00:08:33,915 --> 00:08:35,516
Your first grandchild.
Mm-hmm.
187
00:08:35,550 --> 00:08:38,135
This is number, uh...
11 for me. Oh.
188
00:08:38,170 --> 00:08:41,172
Oh!
By the way, I call "Nana."
189
00:08:41,223 --> 00:08:44,308
Wait. Uh, I'm sorry. Um...
190
00:08:44,342 --> 00:08:47,344
I'm so sorry. (chuckles)
191
00:08:47,395 --> 00:08:49,346
What did you just say?
192
00:08:49,397 --> 00:08:51,816
I want the baby
to call me "Nana."
193
00:08:51,850 --> 00:08:55,302
That's what I want to be called.
It's a tradition in my family.
194
00:08:55,337 --> 00:08:57,404
Mm. Then you should've
called it.
195
00:08:57,439 --> 00:09:00,808
I can have "Nana."
right, Mia?
196
00:09:00,842 --> 00:09:03,711
Yes!
197
00:09:03,745 --> 00:09:06,146
Oh, Mia, thank you.
You're okay.
198
00:09:06,164 --> 00:09:07,665
(gasps)
199
00:09:09,484 --> 00:09:11,218
Yes!
200
00:09:15,924 --> 00:09:17,758
"pee-paw" is available.
201
00:09:24,171 --> 00:09:26,906
You know what? We should drive
all the way to the north pole.
202
00:09:26,940 --> 00:09:28,841
We could do it.
They have gas stations.
203
00:09:28,876 --> 00:09:31,010
Hey! Do you think
we can lift this car?
204
00:09:31,044 --> 00:09:33,646
I'm gonna hold my breath. (inhales deeply)
(lowered voice) do you think he's gonna be okay?
205
00:09:33,680 --> 00:09:36,582
I don't know,
but I like this Joel
206
00:09:36,617 --> 00:09:39,418
A lot better than salt-free Joel. Ooh!
Speed up. I wanna moon this trucker.
207
00:09:39,453 --> 00:09:42,221
Oh, hey, hey, hey. I'm all
for having a good time
208
00:09:42,256 --> 00:09:45,091
And making some crazy memories,
but I think we should draw
209
00:09:45,125 --> 00:09:48,327
The line at stuff that's against the law.
I think you should do it, Joel. It'll be awesome.
210
00:09:48,362 --> 00:09:51,430
I'll do it with ya. Wait. What? No! No.
Hey, hey, hey! No one is mooning anyone!
211
00:09:53,717 --> 00:09:56,219
Well, hey, uh, how about this?
212
00:09:56,270 --> 00:09:57,737
(chuckles)
213
00:09:57,771 --> 00:09:59,939
You guys wanna do
somethin' crazy?
214
00:09:59,973 --> 00:10:01,891
Anybody feel like smoking
a cigar?
215
00:10:01,925 --> 00:10:04,377
I'll smoke one.
Hell, I'll eat one.
216
00:10:04,411 --> 00:10:06,812
Let's do it.
I'll light up a cubano.
217
00:10:06,847 --> 00:10:09,048
Ah. No, not light
218
00:10:09,082 --> 00:10:11,784
(chuckles) chew up.
219
00:10:11,818 --> 00:10:14,420
It's called a cigarr-it.
220
00:10:14,454 --> 00:10:16,822
(mouth full) it's like, uh,
nicotine gum, but for cigars.
221
00:10:16,857 --> 00:10:19,725
Here, Casey, try one.
(chuckles) this is gonna be
222
00:10:19,760 --> 00:10:22,545
The craziest story when we get back home,
that you... soda grenade! Fire in the hole!
223
00:10:22,579 --> 00:10:24,864
(fizzes) (screams)
224
00:10:24,898 --> 00:10:27,133
(both laughing)
225
00:10:27,167 --> 00:10:29,569
What the heck was that?!
What the hell?!
226
00:10:29,603 --> 00:10:31,771
You made me swallow my gum!
(laughing)
227
00:10:31,805 --> 00:10:34,740
You're high-fiving him?
Are you kidding me?
228
00:10:34,775 --> 00:10:36,742
Listen...
229
00:10:36,776 --> 00:10:38,377
Ohh.
230
00:10:38,412 --> 00:10:39,829
Oh, the gum.
231
00:10:39,863 --> 00:10:41,364
Oh, I feel sick.
232
00:10:41,415 --> 00:10:43,282
Ohh. We gotta pull over.
233
00:10:43,317 --> 00:10:46,269
Okay, great. You throw up.
I'm gonna name all the States. (pants)
234
00:10:46,303 --> 00:10:50,072
California... Mexico...
Bermuda...
235
00:10:50,123 --> 00:10:53,893
Mia, how could you let her be
called "Nana" when you knew
236
00:10:53,927 --> 00:10:56,712
I wanted it?
I need this woman Toto like me.
237
00:10:56,747 --> 00:11:00,566
You need me to like you.
You gave a"Nana."
238
00:11:00,601 --> 00:11:02,868
We'll just come up
with something else
239
00:11:02,903 --> 00:11:05,304
For the baby to call you.
It'll be fine.
240
00:11:05,339 --> 00:11:07,673
Oh! I'll invent
a new shower game...
241
00:11:07,708 --> 00:11:10,676
"name the old lady."
(laughs)
242
00:11:10,711 --> 00:11:13,512
No. (laughs)
243
00:11:13,547 --> 00:11:16,182
That's not the right name.
244
00:11:18,218 --> 00:11:21,287
Well, we stopped at a r,
and now I don't even know
245
00:11:21,321 --> 00:11:23,689
Where they are. It's like Casey
and Joel are best friends.
246
00:11:23,724 --> 00:11:26,459
I can't believe I'm in
a competition with your dad...
247
00:11:26,493 --> 00:11:29,061
And I'm losing. Oh, don't worry, honey.
You're way cooler than my dad,
248
00:11:29,096 --> 00:11:30,997
And Casey's gonna see it
sooner or later.
249
00:11:31,031 --> 00:11:32,932
You're the coolest man I know.
250
00:11:32,966 --> 00:11:34,867
Great. My girlfriend
thinks I'm cool.
251
00:11:34,901 --> 00:11:36,769
Thanks, Maddie.
That means so much.
252
00:11:36,803 --> 00:11:39,705
You realize you're
alienating the only person
253
00:11:39,740 --> 00:11:42,508
Who thinks you're cool?
(Joel and Casey laughing)
254
00:11:42,542 --> 00:11:45,711
Oh, they're back.
I have to go. Aah! Aah! That w.
255
00:11:45,746 --> 00:11:47,847
What happened to you guys?
256
00:11:47,881 --> 00:11:50,850
You've been gone for, like, a half an hour.
Joel here challenged a whole table of truckers
257
00:11:50,884 --> 00:11:53,286
To a chicken wing eating contest.
And I won!
258
00:11:53,320 --> 00:11:56,222
(whispers) yes!
And then we had an arm wrestling contest,
259
00:11:56,256 --> 00:11:58,658
And I hurt myself
really bad! (laughs)
260
00:11:58,692 --> 00:12:01,127
Then they gave us their hats.
261
00:12:01,161 --> 00:12:03,596
(gasps) oh!
I just had a great idea.
262
00:12:03,630 --> 00:12:06,131
You guys are gonna love this.
(whispers) yes!
263
00:12:06,149 --> 00:12:08,801
(normal voice) how boring
would this road trip have been
264
00:12:08,819 --> 00:12:11,370
If that guy hadn't come along, right?
(door closes)
265
00:12:11,405 --> 00:12:14,457
Look, can we just
get the rest of your stuff
266
00:12:14,491 --> 00:12:17,843
And get in the car and go home?
Okay. What's Joel doing?
267
00:12:17,878 --> 00:12:20,813
(engine starts)
I'll be back in a month!
268
00:12:20,847 --> 00:12:24,183
(tires peal)
269
00:12:29,180 --> 00:12:31,315
(laughs)
Maddie, I need your help.
270
00:12:31,366 --> 00:12:32,799
Well, can it wait?
271
00:12:32,834 --> 00:12:35,686
We're about to play
trivial purs-uterus.
272
00:12:35,720 --> 00:12:38,205
Okay. I finally got
Casey's mom to like me,
273
00:12:38,239 --> 00:12:41,108
But in order to do that,
I had to agree to something
274
00:12:41,142 --> 00:12:43,510
That I really don't want to do.
275
00:12:43,545 --> 00:12:45,529
I have a favor to ask you.
276
00:12:45,563 --> 00:12:47,181
Oh, anything.
277
00:12:47,215 --> 00:12:49,550
On our farm is
a big, beautiful barn
278
00:12:49,584 --> 00:12:51,818
That
my great-grandmother built.
279
00:12:51,886 --> 00:12:54,688
And you want us to have
the wedding there? (chuckles)
280
00:12:54,722 --> 00:12:56,623
No, that wouldn't be
appropriate.
281
00:12:56,658 --> 00:12:59,226
We want you to have
the baby there.
282
00:12:59,260 --> 00:13:01,762
A barn?
I know. It's crazy, right?
283
00:13:01,796 --> 00:13:05,399
Just tell her you're not gonna do it.
I tried... But it came out.
284
00:13:05,433 --> 00:13:08,202
I'd love to have a barn baby!
285
00:13:08,236 --> 00:13:10,404
Ohh.
286
00:13:10,438 --> 00:13:13,106
That's why you've got
to help me. She likes me now.
287
00:13:13,141 --> 00:13:15,976
She said she was very impressed,
because she thought for sure
288
00:13:16,010 --> 00:13:18,178
I was one of
those hoity-toity women
289
00:13:18,213 --> 00:13:20,564
That like to have
their babies in a hospital.
290
00:13:20,598 --> 00:13:22,983
Look, this is crazy.
She can't be serious.
291
00:13:23,017 --> 00:13:25,168
Apparently,
it's a family tradition.
292
00:13:25,220 --> 00:13:27,120
It's where Casey was born.
293
00:13:27,155 --> 00:13:30,958
Casey was born in a barn?
That explains a lot.
294
00:13:30,992 --> 00:13:33,961
And she said all her kids
were born there.
295
00:13:33,995 --> 00:13:36,363
Wait. "kid" is also a word
for goat.
296
00:13:36,397 --> 00:13:38,932
Does she mean baby goats
or children?
297
00:13:38,967 --> 00:13:42,102
Does it matter? (sighs) Maddie,
what am I gonna do? (door closes)
298
00:13:42,136 --> 00:13:44,955
You need mom. She's really good
at handling stuff like this.
299
00:13:44,989 --> 00:13:47,941
(gasps) remember when I was 16
and that store clerk accused me
300
00:13:47,976 --> 00:13:50,344
Of stealing cigarettes,
and then mom went in,
301
00:13:50,378 --> 00:13:53,413
Yelled at him,
and forced him to apologize?
302
00:13:53,448 --> 00:13:55,349
Oh, yeah.
She got him deported.
303
00:13:58,052 --> 00:14:00,320
She gets stuff done.
304
00:14:00,354 --> 00:14:04,157
Mia, you have to come over here.
I have pictures of the barn,
305
00:14:04,192 --> 00:14:07,527
And one of them shows your birthing stall.
(chuckles) oh!
306
00:14:07,561 --> 00:14:09,529
(whispers) help me.
307
00:14:09,564 --> 00:14:12,366
Mom, there's a problem.
308
00:14:12,400 --> 00:14:15,269
I am not the one who put
the vodka in the punch,
309
00:14:15,303 --> 00:14:17,804
But I'm certainly not
complaining.
310
00:14:17,839 --> 00:14:20,340
No, no, it's not that.
It's... it's Mia.
311
00:14:20,375 --> 00:14:22,276
Backstabber.
She's in trouble.
312
00:14:22,310 --> 00:14:24,678
Not my concern.
She promised Casey's mom...
313
00:14:24,712 --> 00:14:27,497
Ooh, her new b.F.F.
That she'd give birth in her barn.
314
00:14:27,532 --> 00:14:29,783
Well, good for her.
315
00:14:29,817 --> 00:14:32,352
Wait. What?
316
00:14:32,387 --> 00:14:34,288
(sighs) okay, that's it.
317
00:14:34,322 --> 00:14:37,140
First "Nana." now this.
That woman's gone too far.
318
00:14:37,191 --> 00:14:39,526
No grandchild of mine
is gonna be born
319
00:14:39,560 --> 00:14:40,927
In that disgusting place.
320
00:14:40,962 --> 00:14:42,929
Ugh. I know. A barn?
321
00:14:42,964 --> 00:14:44,481
I meant Vermont.
322
00:14:44,532 --> 00:14:46,333
(mouths word)
323
00:14:46,367 --> 00:14:49,219
I didn't hear anything
definite about Mr. Putney,
324
00:14:49,270 --> 00:14:52,205
But a few of the truckers
are talking about a naked dude
325
00:14:52,240 --> 00:14:54,908
Running down I-87
chugging soy sauce.
326
00:14:54,942 --> 00:14:57,944
I called a cab for us.
Should be here in, like, 20.
327
00:14:57,979 --> 00:15:01,114
You want a fry?
What is going on in this relationship?
328
00:15:01,149 --> 00:15:03,984
You blow me off. You offer me
a fry. You're hot. You're cold.
329
00:15:04,052 --> 00:15:05,886
I'm getting a lot
of mixed signals here.
330
00:15:05,920 --> 00:15:08,288
Well, the fries are here
if you want 'em,
331
00:15:08,323 --> 00:15:10,324
And now the weirdness is, too.
332
00:15:10,358 --> 00:15:12,459
I just thought that
this road trip would be
333
00:15:12,493 --> 00:15:14,394
A chance for us
to become better friends,
334
00:15:14,429 --> 00:15:16,330
But when you invited
Mr. Putney, it just...
335
00:15:16,364 --> 00:15:18,365
I didn't want to invite him.
Vicky made me.
336
00:15:18,399 --> 00:15:21,068
I wanted it to just be us two.
Really?
337
00:15:21,102 --> 00:15:24,071
Yeah. And I don't know
what you're talking about.
338
00:15:24,105 --> 00:15:26,206
We're already great friends.
339
00:15:26,240 --> 00:15:28,141
We're both obsessed
with ninja movies,
340
00:15:28,176 --> 00:15:30,577
We both love mini golf
and hate real golf,
341
00:15:30,611 --> 00:15:32,479
And now we have a great story.
342
00:15:32,513 --> 00:15:34,848
Hey, remember that time
"road Joel" abandoned us
343
00:15:34,882 --> 00:15:36,783
At a diner in Albany?
344
00:15:36,818 --> 00:15:39,186
Oh, yeah. That was nuts.
(chuckles)
345
00:15:39,220 --> 00:15:42,422
Thanks, Casey.
346
00:15:42,456 --> 00:15:43,857
Here.
347
00:15:43,891 --> 00:15:46,927
(chuckles)
348
00:15:48,763 --> 00:15:50,731
(sighs)
349
00:15:52,633 --> 00:15:54,167
How's that feel?
350
00:15:54,202 --> 00:15:57,170
(clicks tongue)
I'm not gonna lie.
351
00:15:57,205 --> 00:15:58,839
It smells odd.
352
00:16:00,942 --> 00:16:03,760
I'm going to lay this out
very clearly,
353
00:16:03,811 --> 00:16:07,147
So even, uh,
a hippie can understand it.
354
00:16:07,165 --> 00:16:10,083
My daughter is not
giving birth in a barn.
355
00:16:10,118 --> 00:16:12,986
Excuse me? I don't think you
have anything to do with this.
356
00:16:13,020 --> 00:16:15,889
It was her decision.
Only because she's been jumping through hoops
357
00:16:15,923 --> 00:16:18,291
Trying to get you to like her.
358
00:16:18,326 --> 00:16:20,227
I don't know
what your problem is,
359
00:16:20,261 --> 00:16:22,145
But my daughter is
a good person.
360
00:16:22,196 --> 00:16:25,932
We've welcomed the vagabond
you raised into our home,
361
00:16:25,967 --> 00:16:29,102
So I just expect you
to welcome Mia into yours.
362
00:16:29,137 --> 00:16:31,304
Or what?
363
00:16:31,339 --> 00:16:34,107
Or I take "Nana," and there's
nothing you can do about it.
364
00:16:34,142 --> 00:16:36,810
But I already called "Nana."
365
00:16:36,844 --> 00:16:40,530
Listen, you live
in bumblefudge, Vermont,
366
00:16:40,565 --> 00:16:42,999
The... the liberal
no-man's-land
367
00:16:43,050 --> 00:16:46,620
Between America and Canada.
368
00:16:46,654 --> 00:16:49,022
I will have daily access
to this child,
369
00:16:49,056 --> 00:16:51,408
And I can teach him to call you
370
00:16:51,459 --> 00:16:53,393
Whatever I damn well please.
371
00:16:53,394 --> 00:16:55,746
Maddie
372
00:16:55,797 --> 00:16:58,765
What was that new game
we were talking about?
373
00:16:58,800 --> 00:17:01,084
Oh, you mean
"name the old lady"?
374
00:17:01,119 --> 00:17:02,552
That's the one.
375
00:17:02,587 --> 00:17:05,522
Let's see how many we can come
up with in a minute. Granny.
376
00:17:05,556 --> 00:17:07,040
Mumsy.
Mee-maw.
377
00:17:07,074 --> 00:17:08,475
Granky.
Grizzly.
378
00:17:08,509 --> 00:17:10,410
Skeletor.
379
00:17:10,445 --> 00:17:12,512
You wouldn't really do that,
would you?
380
00:17:12,547 --> 00:17:14,948
Old mother wrinkle storm.
381
00:17:14,982 --> 00:17:18,819
Okay, okay. You win.
No barn baby.
382
00:17:18,853 --> 00:17:20,487
And?
383
00:17:20,521 --> 00:17:23,223
And I will welcome Mia
into the family.
384
00:17:23,241 --> 00:17:24,674
Good.
385
00:17:24,709 --> 00:17:27,444
You can go tell her right now.
386
00:17:27,478 --> 00:17:29,362
Yeah.
387
00:17:29,397 --> 00:17:31,431
'cause you've been gamed!
388
00:17:31,466 --> 00:17:33,433
Okay. Calm down, honey.
389
00:17:33,468 --> 00:17:35,435
(laughing) okay.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
390
00:17:35,469 --> 00:17:37,904
I'm just so excited
we finally played one.
391
00:17:40,007 --> 00:17:42,876
Wow, that cab ride home was
more than I wanted to spend
392
00:17:42,910 --> 00:17:45,579
On my wedding. Hey, honey.
393
00:17:45,613 --> 00:17:47,063
Hi.
394
00:17:47,098 --> 00:17:49,916
(yelling) mom! Yeah!
395
00:17:49,951 --> 00:17:52,736
Mm-mm! Yeah!
396
00:17:52,787 --> 00:17:55,622
I guess we'll have to get
used to that at some point.
397
00:17:55,656 --> 00:17:57,090
How was your trip?
398
00:17:57,124 --> 00:17:59,659
Oh, yeah, cool.
Whatevs... Er.
399
00:17:59,694 --> 00:18:01,561
(whispers)
we got matching hats!
400
00:18:01,596 --> 00:18:03,697
(laughs)
401
00:18:03,731 --> 00:18:05,699
Well, I have to go.
I'm exhausted.
402
00:18:05,733 --> 00:18:07,601
What kind of punch was that?
403
00:18:07,635 --> 00:18:10,704
Oh, well.
Good night, everyone.
404
00:18:10,738 --> 00:18:12,689
Mwah.
Mwah.
405
00:18:12,740 --> 00:18:16,209
Oh, Mia, I meant to say,
406
00:18:16,244 --> 00:18:19,212
Those bracelets aren't
as clattery and horribly ugly
407
00:18:19,247 --> 00:18:20,647
As I thought.
408
00:18:23,784 --> 00:18:26,086
Good night, Na.
409
00:18:26,120 --> 00:18:28,722
(Casey) love you, mom.
410
00:18:28,756 --> 00:18:30,307
(door closes) wow.
411
00:18:30,358 --> 00:18:33,894
Mm. "not as horribly
ugly as I thought."
412
00:18:33,928 --> 00:18:37,264
That is the nicest thing
she has ever said
413
00:18:37,298 --> 00:18:39,916
To any of my girlfriends.
What did you do?
414
00:18:39,967 --> 00:18:43,253
Oh, it wasn't me. (chuckles)
415
00:18:43,304 --> 00:18:45,772
So I don't know
what you did, mom,
416
00:18:45,806 --> 00:18:49,209
But I know you did do something,
and I appreciate it,
417
00:18:49,243 --> 00:18:52,312
Even after I've treated you
so horribly today.
418
00:18:52,346 --> 00:18:55,715
Oh, honey. I understand.
419
00:18:55,750 --> 00:18:57,551
I had in-laws, too.
420
00:18:57,585 --> 00:19:03,056
Not everyone can be as nice
and warm as our family.
421
00:19:03,124 --> 00:19:04,991
Take the hat off, Ben.
422
00:19:05,026 --> 00:19:09,029
You look like the cowboy
in the village people.
423
00:19:09,063 --> 00:19:10,931
No. Yeah. It's stupid.
424
00:19:10,965 --> 00:19:12,799
(speaks indistinctly)
425
00:19:12,833 --> 00:19:15,302
Dumb.
426
00:19:15,336 --> 00:19:16,770
So, uh...
427
00:19:16,804 --> 00:19:19,673
(lowered voice) which one
of us is gonna tell 'em
428
00:19:19,707 --> 00:19:21,141
That we lost Joel?
429
00:19:21,175 --> 00:19:23,577
To be fair, we didn't lose him.
430
00:19:23,611 --> 00:19:26,012
We know he's going
to the north pole,
431
00:19:26,047 --> 00:19:29,866
And we know he's gonna be
back in a month.
432
00:19:29,901 --> 00:19:31,985
Mr. Putney.
433
00:19:32,019 --> 00:19:33,720
Oh. Hello, gentlemen.
434
00:19:33,754 --> 00:19:36,706
I told the ladies you were
nice enough to drop me off
435
00:19:36,741 --> 00:19:39,693
Before you returned
the rental car.
436
00:19:41,495 --> 00:19:44,581
(lowered voice)
I'm off the salt pony, boys.
437
00:19:44,632 --> 00:19:47,701
It was fun while it lasted,
but it had to end at some point.
438
00:19:47,735 --> 00:19:50,236
Wait. I-is that
a hospital wristband?
439
00:19:50,271 --> 00:19:51,738
Don't worry.
440
00:19:51,772 --> 00:19:55,442
It's from a dog hospital.
441
00:19:55,476 --> 00:19:57,928
And tomorrow we should look
for Casey's rental car.
442
00:19:57,979 --> 00:20:00,947
I hope you sprung for
the insurance, because it is...
443
00:20:00,982 --> 00:20:02,449
(high-pitched voice)
messed...
444
00:20:02,483 --> 00:20:04,317
(normal voice) up.
445
00:20:04,352 --> 00:20:06,586
(whistles)
446
00:20:06,621 --> 00:20:08,822
(whispers) ka-boom!
447
00:20:13,352 --> 00:20:14,686
(sneezes and sniffles)
448
00:20:14,720 --> 00:20:16,755
Oh, no.
Are you getting sick?
449
00:20:16,789 --> 00:20:19,290
Ugh. I don't know
if it's the goat milk
450
00:20:19,325 --> 00:20:21,226
Or the stress
of meeting your mom,
451
00:20:21,260 --> 00:20:24,129
But I think I'm getting a cold.
(sniffles) mm.
452
00:20:26,766 --> 00:20:29,834
If you're sick,
I want to be sick with you.
453
00:20:29,869 --> 00:20:31,569
(giggles)
454
00:20:31,604 --> 00:20:33,938
(sneezes) are you sick?
455
00:20:33,973 --> 00:20:37,609
Ugh. I might be. I may have
overdone it on the road trip.
456
00:20:37,643 --> 00:20:40,829
Hang on. I'll make you
my famous get-well smoothie.
457
00:20:40,863 --> 00:20:42,514
No! (chuckles)
458
00:20:42,548 --> 00:20:45,383
I'm not that sick.
459
00:20:46,385 --> 00:20:47,919
(sneezes)
460
00:20:47,953 --> 00:20:49,454
Are you sick?
461
00:20:49,488 --> 00:20:50,955
Maybe.
462
00:20:50,990 --> 00:20:53,425
I'll be at my cousin's.
463
00:20:57,844 --> 00:21:00,029
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