1
00:00:02,102 --> 00:00:03,399
So here's what you missed on Glee.
2
00:00:03,470 --> 00:00:05,028
Sue tried to shoot
Brittany out of a cannon.
3
00:00:05,105 --> 00:00:07,630
It wasn't safe, so Brit,
Santana and Quinn quit the Cheerios.
4
00:00:07,707 --> 00:00:09,971
- Sucks for you. - Now we get to see what
they look like In street clothes.
5
00:00:10,043 --> 00:00:12,068
Finn broke up with Rachel
because she made out with Puck...
6
00:00:12,145 --> 00:00:14,477
but then Quinn kissed Finn after the big game
, even though she's been dating Sam.
7
00:00:14,547 --> 00:00:17,880
Yikes! It used to be a love triangle,
and now It's like a pentagon.
8
00:00:17,951 --> 00:00:19,509
And that's what you missed on Glee.
9
00:00:22,022 --> 00:00:24,786
We all know I'm
not the smartest guy in the world...
10
00:00:24,858 --> 00:00:27,088
but there are two lessons
I learned the hard way.
11
00:00:27,160 --> 00:00:29,128
One: Never punch a cop.
12
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The other one: You can't choose love.
Love chooses you.
13
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I mean, I could have
any girl I wanted...
14
00:00:38,038 --> 00:00:42,134
but here I am in the middle of Geometry
or English or something...
15
00:00:42,208 --> 00:00:44,506
and the only girl I've
got my eye on is...
16
00:00:44,577 --> 00:00:46,408
a whole lot of woman.
17
00:00:46,479 --> 00:00:48,140
I owe it all to sectionals.
18
00:00:48,214 --> 00:00:51,012
We needed a 12th member, and I
told her if she joined the Glee Club...
19
00:00:51,084 --> 00:00:53,143
I'd give her seven
minutes in heaven.
20
00:00:56,189 --> 00:01:00,182
But what went down in that
janitor's closet was... epic.
21
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- You're really not good at this and kinda scrawny.
- You gotta be kidding me.
22
00:01:08,068 --> 00:01:10,036
Yeah, you're not turning me on at all.
23
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- Later, sad sack.
- But that was only three minutes.
24
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Three minutes I'll never get back.
25
00:01:17,043 --> 00:01:19,637
Maybe it's because she's
constantly insulting me like my mom.
26
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Maybe I just dig a chick with curves.
27
00:01:21,781 --> 00:01:24,443
But it's almost Valentine's Day,
and it's official.
28
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Stare at me again, and
I'll break your nuts.
29
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Also, these candies you gave me:
They sucked.
30
00:01:31,257 --> 00:01:34,158
- But you ate all of them.
- I had to make sure they all sucked.
31
00:01:36,396 --> 00:01:38,455
I'm in love with Lauren Zizes.
32
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It's amazing what actually
accomplishing something does to a person.
33
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I know what you're thinking...
that they're all only into me...
34
00:01:49,175 --> 00:01:52,076
because I won the first conference
championship In this school's history...
35
00:01:52,145 --> 00:01:53,737
but I've changed.
36
00:01:53,813 --> 00:01:55,804
I'm walking taller,
carrying a bigger stick...
37
00:01:55,882 --> 00:01:57,577
and using It to fight
off the ladies.
38
00:01:57,650 --> 00:01:59,982
- I love you, Finnie-bear.
- Thanks, Becky.
39
00:02:00,753 --> 00:02:02,812
- Oh!
- Be my valentine?
40
00:02:03,890 --> 00:02:05,983
Awesome. I'll keep you posted.
41
00:02:06,059 --> 00:02:07,993
Copy that.
44
00:02:15,268 --> 00:02:18,499
Bingo. I just need to go for this.
45
00:02:18,571 --> 00:02:22,598
Maybe the reason it never worked out with
Rachel was because I was never over Quinn.
46
00:02:22,675 --> 00:02:26,270
I know I can pry her away from Sam
if I can get her to kiss me again.
47
00:02:26,346 --> 00:02:31,215
The ridiculous thlng is that I could get
every girl in this school to kiss me but her.
48
00:02:31,284 --> 00:02:32,774
Game on.
49
00:02:36,689 --> 00:02:40,819
Okay, I'm all for flair, but these
Valentine Day decorations are just tacky.
50
00:02:40,894 --> 00:02:42,725
I mean, what the hell
is this supposed to be?
51
00:02:42,795 --> 00:02:46,891
It's clearly puppy love.
It's cute. Come on.
52
00:02:46,966 --> 00:02:48,797
- I love you!
- Oh!
53
00:02:48,868 --> 00:02:50,358
- Adorable.
- Okay, this is creepy.
54
00:02:50,436 --> 00:02:54,839
It's a simple excuse to sell candy
and greeting cards on a holiday.
55
00:02:54,908 --> 00:02:57,900
Not true. People have been celebrating
Valentine's Day for centuries.
56
00:02:57,977 --> 00:03:01,970
- And call me a hopeless romantic, but
it's my favorite holiday. - Really?
57
00:03:02,081 --> 00:03:04,072
I think there's something
really great about a day...
58
00:03:04,117 --> 00:03:08,315
where you're encouraged to just lay it all
on the line and say to somebody...
59
00:03:08,388 --> 00:03:10,481
"I'm in love with you."
60
00:03:10,557 --> 00:03:13,151
You know?
61
00:03:13,226 --> 00:03:16,093
And this year I wanna do something really
radical, so I need your opinion on this.
62
00:03:16,162 --> 00:03:21,190
But there's this guy
that I sort of... like...
63
00:03:21,267 --> 00:03:23,132
and I've only known him
for a little while...
64
00:03:23,203 --> 00:03:26,866
but I wanna tell him that I think my feelings
are starting to change into something...
65
00:03:28,208 --> 00:03:30,506
deeper.
66
00:03:30,577 --> 00:03:32,670
So I have to ask, do you
think it's too much...
67
00:03:32,745 --> 00:03:34,406
to sing to somebody on Valentine's Day?
68
00:03:35,648 --> 00:03:37,138
Not at all.
69
00:03:38,785 --> 00:03:40,275
What can I get you?
70
00:03:40,353 --> 00:03:42,787
A medium drip
and a grande nonfat mocha for this guy...
71
00:03:42,855 --> 00:03:46,313
and maybe I could get 'em to split
one of those Cupid cookies.
72
00:03:46,392 --> 00:03:48,360
You know my coffee order?
73
00:03:48,428 --> 00:03:49,918
Of course I do.
74
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That'll be 8.40.
75
00:03:51,931 --> 00:03:54,365
Don't even bother, dummy. It's on me.
76
00:03:54,434 --> 00:03:56,061
Keep the change.
77
00:03:58,705 --> 00:04:01,606
I do believe I have a new favorite holiday.
78
00:04:01,674 --> 00:04:04,142
All right, guys. I have one word for you.
79
00:04:05,211 --> 00:04:07,839
- Brittany.
- Is it "love"?
80
00:04:07,914 --> 00:04:09,347
I'm totally gonna graduate now!
81
00:04:09,415 --> 00:04:12,509
Valentine's Day is comin' up,
so for this week's lesson...
82
00:04:12,585 --> 00:04:15,110
I want you guys to pick a partner...
83
00:04:15,188 --> 00:04:19,852
because you're gonna sing to them what you
think is the world's greatest love song.
84
00:04:19,926 --> 00:04:23,987
Yeah. Find a song that communicates
all the things that love means to you.
85
00:04:24,063 --> 00:04:25,621
- Now, partner up.
- Mr. Schue?
86
00:04:25,698 --> 00:04:27,359
Can I say something?
87
00:04:27,433 --> 00:04:30,300
I just wanted to point out that,
for the first time...
88
00:04:30,370 --> 00:04:34,704
an entire week has gone by
without any one of us getting Slusheed.
89
00:04:34,774 --> 00:04:37,709
I think the fact that I led the football
team to a conference championship...
90
00:04:37,777 --> 00:04:39,677
might have something to do with it.
91
00:04:39,746 --> 00:04:43,477
Fact is that I'm the closest thing that this
Glee Club has to a celebrity right now...
92
00:04:43,549 --> 00:04:47,451
and, just like a famous athlete,
I wanna give to a charity.
93
00:04:47,520 --> 00:04:49,181
You guys.
94
00:04:49,255 --> 00:04:52,247
So I'm setting up a kissing booth
for a dollar a smooch...
95
00:04:52,325 --> 00:04:54,850
and donating the proceeds
to Glee Club to help us...
96
00:04:54,927 --> 00:04:56,758
Don't even act like
you're trying to help this Glee Club out.
97
00:04:56,829 --> 00:04:58,729
You just want to kiss a bunch of girls.
98
00:04:58,831 --> 00:05:01,925
I've kissed Finn,
and can I just say, "Not worth a buck."
99
00:05:01,968 --> 00:05:05,404
I would, however,
pay $100 to jiggle one of his man boobs.
100
00:05:05,471 --> 00:05:08,269
- Do you ever get tired of tearing other people down?
- No, not really.
101
00:05:08,341 --> 00:05:11,003
'Cause you always just seem to be meddling
in everybody else's business.
102
00:05:11,077 --> 00:05:12,908
Oh, please. You guys love me.
103
00:05:12,979 --> 00:05:14,970
I keep it real, and I'm hilarious.
104
00:05:15,048 --> 00:05:16,538
Actually, you're just a bitch.
105
00:05:16,616 --> 00:05:18,049
- Okay.
- Whoa, whoa.
106
00:05:18,117 --> 00:05:20,608
I'm sorry.
You've just got eyes for my man.
107
00:05:20,687 --> 00:05:22,587
Okay, first of all, I'm not your man.
108
00:05:22,655 --> 00:05:25,556
And Finn is right.
All you ever do is insult us.
109
00:05:25,625 --> 00:05:29,391
Three weeks ago, you said you were
disappointed that I didn't have a lizard baby.
110
00:05:29,462 --> 00:05:32,625
Five minutes ago, you said Mr.
Schue belonged in a twelve-step program.
111
00:05:32,699 --> 00:05:34,291
- Wait, what?
- You're addicted to vests.
112
00:05:34,367 --> 00:05:37,359
The truth is, Santana,
you can dish it out, but you can't take it.
113
00:05:37,437 --> 00:05:39,701
Okay, maybe you're right.
Maybe I am destined to play...
114
00:05:39,772 --> 00:05:41,706
the title role in the Broadway
musical version of Willow...
115
00:05:41,774 --> 00:05:44,299
but the only job you're gonna have
is working on a pole.
116
00:05:45,545 --> 00:05:48,912
Fine.
117
00:05:48,981 --> 00:05:50,881
Santana.
118
00:05:50,950 --> 00:05:54,351
Maybe try rocking back and forth.
People do that in movies.
119
00:05:54,420 --> 00:06:00,188
No. 'Cause I just try
to be really, really honest with people...
120
00:06:00,293 --> 00:06:03,524
when I think that they suck, you know?
121
00:06:03,563 --> 00:06:05,053
- Yeah.
- No one gets it.
122
00:06:09,202 --> 00:06:12,137
I suppose you want me to thank you
for sticking up for me today...
123
00:06:12,205 --> 00:06:14,730
except that makes it seem like
I need somebody to stick up for me, so...
124
00:06:14,807 --> 00:06:16,832
Oh, no, no. Trust me.
125
00:06:16,909 --> 00:06:19,503
I know that you don't need me
to stick up for you.
126
00:06:19,579 --> 00:06:21,410
- You're all kinds of tough.
- Mmm. That's true.
127
00:06:21,481 --> 00:06:25,679
How about you let me
take you to Breadstix for Valentine's Day?
128
00:06:25,752 --> 00:06:27,982
You seriously think it's that easy?
129
00:06:28,054 --> 00:06:32,354
I'm not desperate, so if you really
want this, you best come correct.
130
00:06:32,425 --> 00:06:36,418
Because I spell "woman" Z-I-Z-E-S.
131
00:06:36,496 --> 00:06:39,124
And I need to be wooed.
You understand me?
132
00:06:39,198 --> 00:06:41,564
Wooed.
133
00:06:41,634 --> 00:06:42,623
Damn.
134
00:06:46,806 --> 00:06:49,138
Hey. Whatcha doin'?
135
00:06:49,208 --> 00:06:53,269
Nothing. Just, uh, daydreaming.
Plotting weekend outfits.
136
00:06:53,346 --> 00:06:56,747
Well, come on.
You're gonna want to see this.
137
00:06:56,816 --> 00:06:59,080
I've called an emergency meeting
of The Warblers' Council.
138
00:06:59,185 --> 00:07:01,745
- Sounds serious.
- Let's hope not.
139
00:07:01,788 --> 00:07:05,155
I just need to ask them
a tiny, little favor.
140
00:07:05,224 --> 00:07:07,021
This emergency meeting is called to order.
141
00:07:07,093 --> 00:07:09,288
Junior member Blaine Anderson,
the floor is yours.
142
00:07:10,263 --> 00:07:12,026
Esteemed Council, I'll be brief.
143
00:07:12,098 --> 00:07:14,123
Simply put...
144
00:07:16,002 --> 00:07:19,494
- I'm in love.
- Ooh!
145
00:07:19,572 --> 00:07:21,665
Congrats.
146
00:07:21,741 --> 00:07:25,677
I'm not really good at talking about my feelings.
I'm much better at singing them.
147
00:07:25,745 --> 00:07:28,543
But still, I could use a little help.
148
00:07:28,614 --> 00:07:31,242
Which is why I'm asking
to enlist The Warblers...
149
00:07:31,317 --> 00:07:34,844
to help serenade this individual in song...
150
00:07:36,088 --> 00:07:37,578
off-campus.
151
00:07:37,657 --> 00:07:39,488
- What?
- Off-campus?
152
00:07:39,559 --> 00:07:41,527
- Yeah, right. No way. Uh-uh.
- Are you serious?
153
00:07:42,862 --> 00:07:46,389
I- I know what I'm asking
is slightly unusual.
154
00:07:46,466 --> 00:07:50,129
The Warblers haven't performed
in an informal setting since 1927...
155
00:07:50,203 --> 00:07:53,434
when the Spirit of St. Louis overshot the
tarmac and plowed through seven Warblers...
156
00:07:53,506 --> 00:07:56,669
during an impromptu rendition
of "Welcome to Ohio, Lucky Lindy."
157
00:07:56,742 --> 00:07:59,040
Why would we even consider
what you're asking?
158
00:07:59,145 --> 00:08:01,579
I firmly believe that our reticence
to perform in public...
159
00:08:01,614 --> 00:08:03,275
nearly cost us a trip to regionals.
160
00:08:03,349 --> 00:08:05,510
We're becoming privileged, porcelain birds.
161
00:08:07,920 --> 00:08:09,854
You mock us, sir!
162
00:08:09,922 --> 00:08:13,585
- Thad, David, I will have order.
- May I please say something?
163
00:08:15,862 --> 00:08:19,059
With respect,
I believe Blaine has a point.
164
00:08:19,131 --> 00:08:23,033
The Warblers are so concerned
with image and tradition...
165
00:08:23,102 --> 00:08:28,301
that sometimes I feel like we miss out on
opportunities to step outside our comfort zones.
166
00:08:28,374 --> 00:08:31,741
When I was on New Directions,
we performed in front of hostile crowds...
167
00:08:31,811 --> 00:08:33,472
pretty much anywhere we went.
168
00:08:33,546 --> 00:08:35,878
I mean, mattress stores, shopping malls.
169
00:08:35,948 --> 00:08:38,712
I had a cat thrown at me in a nursing home once.
170
00:08:38,784 --> 00:08:42,982
But it- It gave us confidence.
It kept us loose.
171
00:08:43,055 --> 00:08:45,080
And where would
this performance take place?
172
00:08:45,157 --> 00:08:47,455
The Gap at the North Hills mall.
173
00:08:48,628 --> 00:08:51,222
I'd like to call it "The
Warblers' Gap Attack."
174
00:08:51,297 --> 00:08:52,992
Why The Gap?
175
00:08:53,065 --> 00:08:55,499
The guy that I like is a junior manager.
176
00:08:55,568 --> 00:08:58,264
All those in favor?
177
00:09:00,006 --> 00:09:02,406
- I was absolutely devastated.
- ##
178
00:09:02,475 --> 00:09:05,706
Did he ever actually say
you two were dating?
179
00:09:06,746 --> 00:09:08,236
Well, not in so many words.
180
00:09:08,314 --> 00:09:10,111
Well, did he put the moves on?
181
00:09:10,182 --> 00:09:13,913
No, but we were always singing duets,
and he was always smiling at me.
182
00:09:16,122 --> 00:09:18,852
Oh, my God, I made up the whole thing
in my head, didn't I?
183
00:09:18,925 --> 00:09:23,828
Listen, we've all been there.
At least I have, with you.
184
00:09:23,896 --> 00:09:25,523
I know exactly what you mean.
185
00:09:25,598 --> 00:09:28,658
I mean, if Finn thinks that he's just
gonna walk out of my life, he's wrong.
186
00:09:28,734 --> 00:09:31,532
'Cause I'm gonna go up to that kissing
booth tomorrow with a $100 bill...
187
00:09:31,604 --> 00:09:33,367
and he's not gonna be able to make change.
188
00:09:33,439 --> 00:09:35,430
Then he's gonna be forced
to kiss me 100 times...
189
00:09:35,508 --> 00:09:37,169
- and when his lips touch mine-
- Hey.
190
00:09:37,243 --> 00:09:39,803
- He's gonna feel it.
- We're supposed to be giving Kurt advice, remember?
191
00:09:39,879 --> 00:09:41,506
Yeah.
192
00:09:41,581 --> 00:09:45,039
- So you are going to The Gap Attack though, right?
- Sh-Should I?
193
00:09:45,117 --> 00:09:46,778
- Yes!
- Mm-hmm.
194
00:09:46,852 --> 00:09:50,015
Scope out the competition.
See what this guy's like.
195
00:09:50,089 --> 00:09:52,649
You know, you two are
both so guy crazy.
196
00:09:52,725 --> 00:09:57,219
Yeah. Look at me. I don't have a date for
Valentine's Day, and I could give a rip.
197
00:09:57,296 --> 00:09:59,161
The three of us are divas.
198
00:09:59,231 --> 00:10:03,167
Look at our idols:
Whitney, Barbra, Patti LuPone.
199
00:10:03,235 --> 00:10:05,795
They all became stars
while they were single.
200
00:10:05,871 --> 00:10:10,137
They took all the pain and loneliness,
and they put it into their music.
201
00:10:10,209 --> 00:10:13,975
People can relate to it.
Everybody feels lonely.
202
00:10:14,046 --> 00:10:16,537
Harnessing this pain
is why they became legends.
203
00:10:18,184 --> 00:10:19,674
Why has this never occurred to me?
204
00:10:19,752 --> 00:10:23,279
Sometimes you have to choose
between love and talent...
205
00:10:23,356 --> 00:10:27,793
and, as far as I'm concerned,
we all need to fly solo for a while.
206
00:10:30,830 --> 00:10:34,266
It's so nice to be around girls
for a change.
207
00:10:34,333 --> 00:10:38,360
- Aw. Here.
- Don't sit on the pizza.
208
00:10:40,106 --> 00:10:45,567
# Are you gonna take me home tonight? #
209
00:10:45,645 --> 00:10:50,912
# Oh, down beside that red firelight #
210
00:10:50,983 --> 00:10:55,545
# Are you gonna let it all hang out? #
211
00:10:55,621 --> 00:11:00,718
# Fat-bottomed girls,
you make the rockin' world go round #
212
00:11:04,497 --> 00:11:06,522
Hey!
213
00:11:06,599 --> 00:11:09,261
# I was just a skinny lad #
214
00:11:09,335 --> 00:11:11,599
# Never knew no good from bad #
215
00:11:11,671 --> 00:11:16,870
# But I knew love before
I left my nursery #
216
00:11:16,942 --> 00:11:19,809
# Left alone with big fat Fanny #
217
00:11:19,879 --> 00:11:23,144
# She was such a naughty nanny #
218
00:11:23,215 --> 00:11:27,549
# Hey, big woman,
you made a bad boy outta me #
219
00:11:35,628 --> 00:11:38,563
# I've been singin' with my band #
220
00:11:38,631 --> 00:11:41,065
# Across the water
Across the land #
221
00:11:41,133 --> 00:11:45,126
# I seen every blue-eyed
floozy on the way #
222
00:11:45,204 --> 00:11:47,331
- # Hey #
- Whoo!
223
00:11:47,406 --> 00:11:49,636
- # But their beauty and their style #
- Whoo!
224
00:11:49,709 --> 00:11:52,007
# Went kinda smooth after a while #
225
00:11:52,078 --> 00:11:57,015
# Take me to them lardy ladies every time #
226
00:11:57,083 --> 00:12:02,578
- Come on!
- # Oh, won't you take me home tonight? #
227
00:12:02,655 --> 00:12:08,616
# Oh, down beside your red firelight #
228
00:12:08,694 --> 00:12:12,960
# Are you gonna let it all hang out? #
229
00:12:13,032 --> 00:12:17,833
# Fat-bottomed girls,
you make the rockin' world go round #
230
00:12:17,903 --> 00:12:20,463
- # Yeah #
- # Fat-bottomed girls, you make the-#
231
00:12:20,539 --> 00:12:24,635
# Rockin' world go round #
232
00:12:24,710 --> 00:12:26,803
Get on your bikes and ride!
233
00:12:29,582 --> 00:12:32,278
# Ooh, yeah #
234
00:12:32,351 --> 00:12:36,947
- # Oh, yeah, them fat-bottomed girls #
- # Fat-bottomed girls #
235
00:12:37,022 --> 00:12:40,389
# Yeah, yeah, yeah ##
236
00:12:59,278 --> 00:13:01,337
So, um, what did you think?
237
00:13:01,413 --> 00:13:03,779
I mean, that's kind of
my love song to you, 'cause...
238
00:13:03,849 --> 00:13:05,976
you know,
you're a little on the heavier side...
239
00:13:06,051 --> 00:13:11,546
but, like the song says,
you know, I'm kind of into it, so...
240
00:13:11,624 --> 00:13:14,024
That was the first time
anyone ever sang me a love song.
241
00:13:16,228 --> 00:13:18,321
And it made me feel like crap.
242
00:13:26,438 --> 00:13:28,565
I want tongue.
243
00:13:28,641 --> 00:13:31,735
Uh, thanks, Becky.
244
00:13:31,811 --> 00:13:33,711
Yes!
245
00:13:33,779 --> 00:13:37,180
Oh. Sorry, ladies. Brush and floss time.
246
00:13:37,249 --> 00:13:41,549
I gotta keep up with the oral hygiene
if I'm gonna satisfy all of you. Sorry.
247
00:13:41,620 --> 00:13:43,451
I know why you're doing this.
248
00:13:43,522 --> 00:13:45,581
You know I'm the only girl in school
that won't kiss you...
249
00:13:45,658 --> 00:13:47,592
and you think
the peer pressure will get to me.
250
00:13:47,660 --> 00:13:49,560
Well, it is sort of uncool that you...
251
00:13:49,628 --> 00:13:52,620
you're too uptight to spend a buck
for a good cause like Glee Club.
252
00:13:52,698 --> 00:13:54,461
I'm not kissing you again.
253
00:13:55,835 --> 00:13:57,632
What are you so afraid of?
254
00:13:57,703 --> 00:14:00,604
Leading you on, hurting my boyfriend.
255
00:14:00,706 --> 00:14:02,936
Your boyfriend's a boy.
256
00:14:02,975 --> 00:14:04,738
Tell me you don't wanna kiss me right now.
257
00:14:04,810 --> 00:14:07,870
I can't do this.
258
00:14:17,156 --> 00:14:20,455
I saw it. You guys' faces were, like,
right up next to each other.
259
00:14:20,526 --> 00:14:22,585
Kissing distance.
260
00:14:24,063 --> 00:14:26,054
What are these things?
261
00:14:26,131 --> 00:14:28,599
They're called records.
People used to listen to music on them.
262
00:14:28,667 --> 00:14:31,295
I'm looking for a classic love song
to sing to you for our assignment...
263
00:14:31,370 --> 00:14:33,304
because,
despite your confusion about the matter...
264
00:14:33,372 --> 00:14:35,738
you are the only guy
I'm ever within kissing distance of.
265
00:14:35,808 --> 00:14:39,835
Okay, so answer me this then.
Why haven't you kissed Finn at his booth yet?
266
00:14:39,912 --> 00:14:42,107
Okay, first you're all up in my business
for kissing Finn...
267
00:14:42,181 --> 00:14:44,308
- and now you're pissed at me for
not kissing him. - It's odd!
268
00:14:44,383 --> 00:14:46,817
- Something seems fishy. I mean-
- This is insane.
269
00:14:46,886 --> 00:14:48,410
Shh!
270
00:14:48,487 --> 00:14:51,615
- Everyone thinks I'm dumb.
- Not... everyone.
271
00:14:51,690 --> 00:14:54,921
But I'm not. At least, not about you.
272
00:14:54,994 --> 00:14:57,326
You play it cool, but you're ambitious.
273
00:14:57,396 --> 00:14:59,557
You like being the queen bee...
274
00:14:59,665 --> 00:15:02,725
and you think being with star quarterback
Finn is gonna put you up there...
275
00:15:02,768 --> 00:15:04,861
whether you're wearing
a Cheerio's uniform or not.
276
00:15:04,937 --> 00:15:07,269
- I'm pretty, but I ain't dumb.
- Fine.
277
00:15:07,339 --> 00:15:10,467
Right after Glee rehearsal,
I'm kissing Finn.
278
00:15:15,014 --> 00:15:16,504
Thanks.
279
00:15:18,617 --> 00:15:21,381
- Are you sure you can handle this?
- Oh, absolutely.
280
00:15:21,453 --> 00:15:24,217
No, I- I've decided
that I'm better off without you.
281
00:15:24,290 --> 00:15:26,224
Not without you specifically...
282
00:15:26,292 --> 00:15:29,887
but without any man who's gonna keep me
from achieving my goals of stardom.
283
00:15:29,962 --> 00:15:32,226
Sweet. Uh.
284
00:15:32,298 --> 00:15:35,131
Well, we should probably kiss.
There's a lineup.
285
00:15:39,738 --> 00:15:41,501
What- What the hell?
On the cheek?
286
00:15:42,675 --> 00:15:44,472
W-Wait.
I thought you said you were over me.
287
00:15:44,543 --> 00:15:48,070
I am, but I still- I still want a real kiss.
That was not a dollar kiss.
288
00:15:48,147 --> 00:15:50,672
I knew you were lying about
being through with love and all that stuff.
289
00:15:50,749 --> 00:15:53,684
Okay, fine. I still love you, okay?
Is that what you wanna hear?
290
00:16:00,459 --> 00:16:02,324
Why can't you just forgive me?
291
00:16:03,362 --> 00:16:04,920
You cheated on me.
That means something.
292
00:16:04,997 --> 00:16:07,363
What does it mean?
That I was stupid? That I was angry?
293
00:16:07,433 --> 00:16:11,494
I don't care about Puck.
I don't care about anybody but you.
294
00:16:19,144 --> 00:16:21,169
It's Valentine's Day.
295
00:16:21,246 --> 00:16:25,182
Oh, yeah. I ordered it for you
for Christmas before we broke up.
296
00:16:25,250 --> 00:16:26,842
Just open it.
297
00:16:36,528 --> 00:16:40,191
I think you're right
about wanting to be alone for a while.
298
00:16:40,265 --> 00:16:43,359
'Cause let's face it, Rachel,
you're better than everyone in this school.
299
00:16:43,435 --> 00:16:46,268
You don't need me or any other guy
to anchor you to Lima.
300
00:16:46,338 --> 00:16:48,966
You're a real star.
301
00:16:49,041 --> 00:16:50,941
You need to shine.
302
00:16:51,010 --> 00:16:53,240
Just because I can't be with you...
303
00:16:53,312 --> 00:16:55,473
doesn't mean I don't believe in you.
304
00:17:00,352 --> 00:17:02,320
Thank you.
305
00:17:08,327 --> 00:17:10,090
It's weird.
306
00:17:10,162 --> 00:17:13,154
Who'd have guessed that the quiet, skinny
Asian guy and the kid in the wheelchair...
307
00:17:13,232 --> 00:17:16,201
would end up dating
two of the raddest girls in school?
308
00:17:16,268 --> 00:17:18,361
- Yeah.
- No jealousy, no drama.
309
00:17:18,437 --> 00:17:19,426
Nope.
310
00:17:19,505 --> 00:17:22,030
- I don't know how we did it.
- I do.
311
00:17:22,107 --> 00:17:23,075
- We're dope.
- ##
312
00:17:23,075 --> 00:17:24,542
- We're dope.
- ##
313
00:17:24,610 --> 00:17:29,013
You know, you-
You make me feel so good inside.
314
00:17:29,081 --> 00:17:32,380
I always wanted a girl just like you.
315
00:17:32,451 --> 00:17:36,114
Such a P.Y.T.
Pretty Young Thing.
316
00:17:36,188 --> 00:17:37,917
Ooh!
317
00:17:39,525 --> 00:17:41,857
# Where did you come from, baby? #
318
00:17:41,927 --> 00:17:44,088
# And, ooh
won't you take me there? #
319
00:17:44,163 --> 00:17:45,994
# Right away
Won't you, baby? #
320
00:17:46,065 --> 00:17:49,091
# Tenderoni you've got to be #
321
00:17:49,168 --> 00:17:52,695
# Spark my nature, sugar
Fly with me #
322
00:17:52,771 --> 00:17:57,333
# Don't you know now
is the perfect time? #
323
00:17:57,409 --> 00:18:00,435
# We can make it right
Hit the city lights #
324
00:18:00,546 --> 00:18:04,676
# Then tonight, ease the lovin' pain #
325
00:18:04,716 --> 00:18:07,708
# Let me take you to the max #
326
00:18:07,786 --> 00:18:09,811
# I want to love you #
327
00:18:09,888 --> 00:18:11,753
- # P. Y. T. #
- # Pretty Young Thing #
328
00:18:11,824 --> 00:18:13,451
# You need some lovin' #
329
00:18:13,525 --> 00:18:15,493
- # T.L. C. #
- # Tender Lovin' Care #
330
00:18:15,561 --> 00:18:18,689
# And I'll take you there #
331
00:18:18,764 --> 00:18:20,789
# Girl, ooh, ooh #
332
00:18:20,866 --> 00:18:22,697
# I want to love you #
333
00:18:22,768 --> 00:18:24,963
- # P.Y.T. #
- # Pretty Young Thing #
334
00:18:25,037 --> 00:18:26,698
# You need some lovin' #
335
00:18:26,772 --> 00:18:29,138
- # T.L.C. #
- # Tender Lovin' Care #
336
00:18:29,208 --> 00:18:31,506
# And I'll take you there #
337
00:18:32,644 --> 00:18:34,373
# Hee #
338
00:18:34,446 --> 00:18:37,813
# Pretty Young Thlng #
339
00:18:37,883 --> 00:18:40,374
# What do you say? #
340
00:18:40,452 --> 00:18:43,888
# Pretty Young Things,
repeat after me #
341
00:18:43,956 --> 00:18:47,983
- # Sing "Na na na" #
- # Na na na #
342
00:18:48,060 --> 00:18:51,894
- # "Na na na na" #
- # Na na na na #
343
00:18:51,964 --> 00:18:55,195
- # Sing "Na na na" #
- # Na na na #
344
00:18:55,267 --> 00:18:57,758
- # "Na na na na na" #
- # Na na na na na #
345
00:18:57,836 --> 00:19:00,771
# I'll take you there #
346
00:19:00,873 --> 00:19:02,204
# Ooh, ooh #
347
00:19:03,242 --> 00:19:04,732
- # Ooh #
- # P.Y.T. #
348
00:19:07,179 --> 00:19:08,874
- # Ah, baby #
- # T.L.C. #
349
00:19:08,947 --> 00:19:10,676
# Ah, baby ##
350
00:19:12,751 --> 00:19:15,584
- That's my man, and his legs don't work.
- Tenderoni!
351
00:19:15,654 --> 00:19:17,713
I'm so in love, I may just start crying.
352
00:19:22,628 --> 00:19:25,620
- What's that?
- It's a receipt. I went to Jared.
353
00:19:25,697 --> 00:19:27,255
You can reimburse me.
354
00:19:27,332 --> 00:19:29,527
We'll have dinner at Breadstix,
and then we can consider this settled.
355
00:19:29,601 --> 00:19:32,365
Um, no. And consider what settled?
356
00:19:32,437 --> 00:19:35,270
Look, you made your point.
I'm sort of a bitch.
357
00:19:35,340 --> 00:19:36,967
But I'm willing to change.
358
00:19:37,042 --> 00:19:38,737
I won't tell Lauren to
look out for poachers...
359
00:19:38,810 --> 00:19:40,937
who might mistake her
for the endangered white rhino.
360
00:19:41,013 --> 00:19:45,143
I heard that.
Don't make me rip that weave out ya' head.
361
00:19:45,217 --> 00:19:47,583
Oh, this is not gonna be good.
362
00:19:47,653 --> 00:19:51,919
- Hello, Lauren. You are a beautiful person.
- Thank you.
363
00:19:51,990 --> 00:19:54,618
Now get out of my way, please,
afores I ends you.
364
00:19:54,693 --> 00:19:56,752
You don't wanna push me.
365
00:19:56,828 --> 00:19:59,888
- Oh.
- But see, I sorta do.
366
00:19:59,965 --> 00:20:03,457
I'm from a part of town
called Lima Heights Adjacent.
367
00:20:03,535 --> 00:20:05,730
You know where that
is, Poppin' Fresh?
368
00:20:05,804 --> 00:20:09,137
It's on the wrong side of the tracks.
369
00:20:20,152 --> 00:20:21,244
Aaah!
370
00:20:21,320 --> 00:20:24,153
Ow! Come on!
371
00:20:45,577 --> 00:20:47,545
Hey! Knock it off and get going!
372
00:20:48,914 --> 00:20:51,974
That's how we do it in Lima Heights.
373
00:20:52,050 --> 00:20:55,645
Let's get you to the nurse.
374
00:20:55,721 --> 00:20:59,054
Please go out with me. Just please.
375
00:20:59,157 --> 00:21:01,751
You make a formal presentation...
376
00:21:02,761 --> 00:21:04,592
and I'll consider it.
377
00:21:13,038 --> 00:21:15,666
Wait. Hold on. I wanna see this.
378
00:21:15,741 --> 00:21:18,904
- Pervert?
- I'd prefer "chaperone" and also "boyfriend."
379
00:21:38,797 --> 00:21:40,560
- Satisfied?
- Yeah.
380
00:21:40,632 --> 00:21:42,532
- Mmm.
- Let's go.
381
00:21:42,601 --> 00:21:45,035
So I took a bunch of those records
you were lookin' at in the library...
382
00:21:45,103 --> 00:21:48,072
- and I'm gonna load them into my iTunes.
- Hey, I forgot my purse.
383
00:21:49,775 --> 00:21:52,744
Meet me tomorrow
afternoon in the auditorium.
384
00:21:56,214 --> 00:21:57,704
Fireworks.
385
00:22:00,752 --> 00:22:04,779
That's him.
The blond one folding sweaters.
386
00:22:04,856 --> 00:22:07,848
- Mmm. I can see the appeal.
- That's quite a head of hair.
387
00:22:07,926 --> 00:22:09,621
His name is Jeremiah.
388
00:22:09,695 --> 00:22:13,631
If he and I got married,
The Gap would give me a 50% discount.
389
00:22:14,800 --> 00:22:16,631
This is insane.
I don't know what I'm doing.
390
00:22:16,702 --> 00:22:19,193
We haven't even really gone out on a date.
We- We shouldn't do this.
391
00:22:19,271 --> 00:22:22,240
Okay, come on, come on. Man up. You're amazing.
392
00:22:22,307 --> 00:22:24,207
He's gonna love you.
393
00:22:27,079 --> 00:22:32,642
# Vum vum vum vum #
394
00:22:34,186 --> 00:22:38,919
- # Vum vum vum vum #
- # Oh #
395
00:22:41,793 --> 00:22:43,954
- ##
- # Baby girl, where you at? #
396
00:22:44,029 --> 00:22:45,929
# Got no strings
Got men attached #
397
00:22:45,997 --> 00:22:49,125
# Can't stop that feelin' for long, no #
398
00:22:49,201 --> 00:22:50,634
# Mmm #
399
00:22:50,702 --> 00:22:53,102
# You makin' dogs wanna beg #
400
00:22:53,171 --> 00:22:54,763
# Breaking them off your fancy legs #
401
00:22:54,840 --> 00:22:58,833
# But they make you feel
right at home, now #
402
00:22:58,944 --> 00:23:00,309
# Oh #
403
00:23:00,345 --> 00:23:04,748
# See all these illusions
just take us too long #
404
00:23:04,816 --> 00:23:08,013
# And I want it bad #
405
00:23:08,086 --> 00:23:11,715
# Because you walk pretty Because you
talk pretty 'Cause you make me sick #
406
00:23:11,790 --> 00:23:15,954
# And I'm not leavin' till you're leavin' #
407
00:23:16,027 --> 00:23:20,123
# Oh, I swear there's something when
she's pumpin' Asking for a raise #
408
00:23:20,198 --> 00:23:22,689
# Well, does she want me
to carry her home now? #
409
00:23:22,768 --> 00:23:25,259
# So does she want me to buy her things? #
410
00:23:25,337 --> 00:23:27,168
# On my house
On my job #
411
00:23:27,239 --> 00:23:31,699
# On my loot, shoes, my shirt,
my crew, my mind, my father's last name #
412
00:23:31,777 --> 00:23:33,711
- # When I get you alone #
- # Alone #
413
00:23:33,779 --> 00:23:35,872
- # When I get you you'll know, babe #
- # Know #
414
00:23:35,947 --> 00:23:38,438
- # When I get you alone #
- # Alone #
415
00:23:38,517 --> 00:23:40,610
# When I get you alone #
416
00:23:43,221 --> 00:23:44,711
# Oh, come on #
417
00:23:47,392 --> 00:23:48,882
# Yeah, yeah #
418
00:23:48,960 --> 00:23:50,757
# Baby girl, you the shh #
419
00:23:50,829 --> 00:23:53,161
# That makes you my equivalent #
420
00:23:53,231 --> 00:23:56,200
# Well, you can keep your toys
in the drawer tonight #
421
00:23:56,268 --> 00:23:59,533
# All right
All my dogs talkin' fast #
422
00:23:59,638 --> 00:24:01,833
# Ain't you got some photographs? #
423
00:24:01,873 --> 00:24:04,933
# 'Cause you shook that room
like a star, now #
424
00:24:05,010 --> 00:24:07,410
# Yes, you did
Yes, you did #
425
00:24:07,479 --> 00:24:11,813
# All these intrusions
just take us too long #
426
00:24:11,883 --> 00:24:14,716
# And I want you so bad #
427
00:24:14,786 --> 00:24:18,347
# Because you walk city Because you
talk city 'Cause you make me sick #
428
00:24:18,423 --> 00:24:22,883
# And I'm not leavin' till you're leavin' #
429
00:24:22,961 --> 00:24:27,261
# So I pray to something she ain't
bluffin' rubbin' up on me #
430
00:24:27,332 --> 00:24:29,197
# Well, does she want me to make a vow?
Check it #
431
00:24:29,267 --> 00:24:31,394
# Well, does she want me to make it now? #
432
00:24:31,470 --> 00:24:33,734
# On my house
On my job #
433
00:24:33,805 --> 00:24:38,606
# On my loot, shoes, my voice,
my crew, my mind, my father's last name #
434
00:24:38,677 --> 00:24:40,474
- # When I get you alone #
- # Alone #
435
00:24:40,545 --> 00:24:42,945
- # When I get you you'll know, babe #
- # Know #
436
00:24:43,014 --> 00:24:45,107
- # When I get you alone #
- # Alone #
437
00:24:45,183 --> 00:24:47,674
# When I get you alone #
438
00:24:47,752 --> 00:24:55,420
# Oh, when I get you alone ##
439
00:24:58,263 --> 00:25:00,390
Was it too much?
440
00:25:02,334 --> 00:25:03,926
Yeah, it was too much.
441
00:25:07,439 --> 00:25:09,202
Jeremiah. Hey.
442
00:25:11,009 --> 00:25:12,772
- What the hell were you doing?
- What?
443
00:25:12,844 --> 00:25:14,471
I just got fired.
444
00:25:14,546 --> 00:25:18,710
You can't just bust a groove
in the middle of somebody else's workplace.
445
00:25:18,783 --> 00:25:20,978
- But they loved it.
- Well, my boss didn't.
446
00:25:22,020 --> 00:25:25,114
Neither did I.
No one here knows I'm gay.
447
00:25:25,190 --> 00:25:28,591
Can I be honest?
Just with the hair, I think they do.
448
00:25:28,660 --> 00:25:31,458
Blaine, let's just be clear here.
449
00:25:31,530 --> 00:25:34,465
You and I got coffee twice.
We're not dating.
450
00:25:34,533 --> 00:25:38,560
If we were, I'd get arrested,
'cause you're underage.
451
00:25:48,413 --> 00:25:52,110
Oh, yeah. That's my ear. I love it. I like it.
452
00:25:53,885 --> 00:25:56,683
Oh, gross.
453
00:25:56,755 --> 00:25:58,245
How is this possible?
454
00:25:58,323 --> 00:26:00,154
I'm the hottest piece of action
at this school...
455
00:26:00,258 --> 00:26:03,056
and here I am on
Valentine's, single.
456
00:26:03,094 --> 00:26:06,063
- Whatever.
- I'll just marry an NFL player.
457
00:26:06,131 --> 00:26:07,621
They're super reliable.
458
00:26:12,103 --> 00:26:14,594
Walt, that's... weird.
459
00:26:14,673 --> 00:26:17,039
Quinn's wearing her
queen bitch smirk...
460
00:26:17,108 --> 00:26:22,171
and Finn only wears that gassy infant look
when he feels guilty about something.
461
00:26:22,247 --> 00:26:26,377
Holy, sweet hell!
They're fooling around!
462
00:26:26,451 --> 00:26:29,443
I know what cheating looks like.
I do it all the tlme.
463
00:26:30,021 --> 00:26:31,249
Huh.
464
00:26:31,323 --> 00:26:36,351
Well, I think it's time to do
what Santana does best.
465
00:26:36,428 --> 00:26:37,952
Revenge.
466
00:26:38,029 --> 00:26:41,430
I've always loved volunteering
at the local hospital.
467
00:26:41,499 --> 00:26:44,366
And not just because
of the sexy candy striper outfit.
468
00:26:44,436 --> 00:26:47,735
Giving back is so important.
469
00:26:47,806 --> 00:26:51,071
Excuse me. Are there any sick students
I can help you tend to?
470
00:26:51,142 --> 00:26:55,977
Wes Fahey's down with mono, and he's
waiting for his mom to pick him up.
471
00:26:56,047 --> 00:26:57,844
But you shouldn't go in there.
He's highly contagious.
472
00:26:57,916 --> 00:27:01,977
Please. I've had mono so many times,
it turned into stereo.
473
00:27:05,957 --> 00:27:06,981
Hi.
474
00:27:08,760 --> 00:27:11,285
So I'm gonna need to borrow your germs.
475
00:27:21,072 --> 00:27:22,596
Thanks.
476
00:27:27,012 --> 00:27:28,912
Mmm. Whoa.
477
00:27:28,980 --> 00:27:31,278
- Whoa.
- Sorry about that. I couldn't help myself.
478
00:27:31,349 --> 00:27:34,375
If I have anything, I
hope it's not contagious.
479
00:27:34,452 --> 00:27:36,443
Wh-What?
480
00:27:40,392 --> 00:27:42,360
Hi.
481
00:27:42,427 --> 00:27:44,918
What is this place?
482
00:27:44,996 --> 00:27:46,691
It's a library.
483
00:27:48,033 --> 00:27:49,523
Haven't you been in here before?
484
00:27:50,168 --> 00:27:51,658
No? Okay.
485
00:27:51,736 --> 00:27:53,931
I don't understand.
You said you wanna formally ask me out...
486
00:27:54,005 --> 00:27:57,065
but I see no envelope of cash,
no muffin basket.
487
00:27:57,142 --> 00:27:59,975
- I sang to you.
- An offensive song.
488
00:28:01,513 --> 00:28:04,380
I don't think you're ready for this jelly.
489
00:28:04,449 --> 00:28:06,940
Wait. I mean, let's be honest here.
490
00:28:07,018 --> 00:28:10,215
You look... the way you look...
491
00:28:10,288 --> 00:28:12,051
and I'm embracing that.
492
00:28:12,123 --> 00:28:13,784
I mean, it turns me on, babe.
493
00:28:13,858 --> 00:28:15,826
I look like America looks.
494
00:28:15,894 --> 00:28:19,728
And like America, I need more than
just a song to get my juices flowin'.
495
00:28:25,637 --> 00:28:29,266
Lauren Zizes, will you go to Breadstix
with me tomorrow night?
496
00:28:29,340 --> 00:28:31,399
Tomorrow's not Valentine's Day.
497
00:28:31,476 --> 00:28:33,444
Tomorrow's the pre-date.
498
00:28:33,511 --> 00:28:36,969
'Cause our mouths are gonna be too busy mackin'
out on Valentine's Day to eat anything.
499
00:28:39,517 --> 00:28:43,180
I like your style, Puckerman.
I dine at 8:00.
500
00:28:45,690 --> 00:28:48,284
Now get outta here before I change my mind.
501
00:28:48,359 --> 00:28:50,418
Good-bye.
502
00:28:52,430 --> 00:28:54,762
Sorry, I was at church.
503
00:28:54,833 --> 00:28:57,324
- Praying for the strength to come?
- Not to.
504
00:29:02,340 --> 00:29:04,706
You realize this is making me a cheater.
505
00:29:05,944 --> 00:29:08,469
The thing that hurt you so badly...
506
00:29:08,546 --> 00:29:10,980
that it made you break up with me...
507
00:29:11,049 --> 00:29:12,812
and Rachel.
508
00:29:16,020 --> 00:29:18,989
You know why it hurt so bad
when you guys cheated on me?
509
00:29:19,057 --> 00:29:20,957
- 'Cause it meant you didn't love me.
- That's not true.
510
00:29:21,025 --> 00:29:24,517
No, at least not enough to not wanna hurt me.
That's the thing about cheating.
511
00:29:24,596 --> 00:29:27,656
When you really love someone,
you do anything to keep them safe.
512
00:29:27,732 --> 00:29:29,996
- I love Sam.
- No, you don't.
513
00:29:30,068 --> 00:29:31,933
Or else you wouldn't have come here.
514
00:29:32,003 --> 00:29:34,699
Fine. I think I love him.
515
00:29:34,773 --> 00:29:37,071
No matter what happens between us...
516
00:29:37,142 --> 00:29:39,872
I'm not gonna break up with Sam
until I know for sure one way or another.
517
00:29:39,944 --> 00:29:41,241
Okay.
518
00:29:41,312 --> 00:29:43,576
Don't you think you can love
two people at one time?
519
00:29:43,648 --> 00:29:47,709
Not totally.
You have to choose eventually.
520
00:29:47,786 --> 00:29:49,549
Not yet.
521
00:29:57,061 --> 00:30:01,828
Ugh. Don't they have anything here that
isn't covered with stupid little hearts?
522
00:30:01,900 --> 00:30:05,597
- Gross.
- Well, you've certainly changed your tune.
523
00:30:05,670 --> 00:30:09,197
I don't think I've ever made
that big a fool of myself...
524
00:30:09,274 --> 00:30:13,734
which is really saying something,
because I've performed at theme parks.
525
00:30:13,812 --> 00:30:17,612
I just- I can't believe
I made it all up in my head.
526
00:30:19,484 --> 00:30:21,213
Okay, can I ask you something?
527
00:30:21,286 --> 00:30:25,313
Because we've always been
completely honest with each other.
528
00:30:25,390 --> 00:30:27,324
You and I- we hang out.
529
00:30:27,392 --> 00:30:31,453
We sing flirty duets
together, you know my coffee order.
530
00:30:31,529 --> 00:30:34,020
Was I supposed to think
that that was nothing?
531
00:30:34,098 --> 00:30:36,032
What do you mean?
532
00:30:37,969 --> 00:30:43,999
I thought the guy that you wanted to
ask out on Valentine's Day... was me.
533
00:30:48,980 --> 00:30:50,880
Wow.
534
00:30:52,984 --> 00:30:54,918
I really am clueless.
535
00:30:57,388 --> 00:30:59,049
Look, Kurt.
536
00:31:00,892 --> 00:31:03,793
I don't know what I'm doing.
537
00:31:03,862 --> 00:31:07,525
I pretend like I do,
and I know how to act it out in song...
538
00:31:07,599 --> 00:31:10,432
but the truth is...
539
00:31:11,769 --> 00:31:15,603
I've never really been anyone's boyfriend.
540
00:31:17,508 --> 00:31:18,998
Me neither.
541
00:31:21,279 --> 00:31:23,907
Let me be really clear about something.
542
00:31:23,982 --> 00:31:26,849
I really, really care about you...
543
00:31:26,918 --> 00:31:30,285
but as you
and about 20 mortified shoppers saw...
544
00:31:30,355 --> 00:31:32,516
I'm not very good at romance.
545
00:31:34,993 --> 00:31:37,120
I don't wanna screw this up.
546
00:31:38,963 --> 00:31:42,694
So it's just like When Harry Met
Sally, but I get to play Meg Ryan.
547
00:31:42,767 --> 00:31:44,132
Deal.
548
00:31:46,871 --> 00:31:50,170
Don't they, uh, get together in the end?
549
00:31:50,241 --> 00:31:53,301
Could I get a nonfat mocha and a medium
drip for my friend, Billy Crystal?
550
00:31:53,378 --> 00:31:56,438
Ah, you know my coffee order.
551
00:31:56,514 --> 00:32:00,041
You know what? I think I got something
for us to do on Valentine's Day.
552
00:32:06,257 --> 00:32:08,953
Thanks for doin' this.
553
00:32:09,027 --> 00:32:11,120
- It really takes the sting off.
- It's cool.
554
00:32:11,195 --> 00:32:14,961
- My dad's a drug addict, so losers make me horny.
- I'm not a loser.
555
00:32:15,033 --> 00:32:17,160
This is the first time
I've ever been stood up.
556
00:32:17,235 --> 00:32:19,465
Must be some chick to blow you off.
557
00:32:20,805 --> 00:32:23,774
Rochelle, I've been covering
your section for 15 minutes.
558
00:32:23,841 --> 00:32:26,674
Your break's over, and your husband called.
559
00:32:31,049 --> 00:32:32,914
Well, I did it.
560
00:32:32,984 --> 00:32:36,750
I kissed every girl in the school
and raised $324 for the Glee Club.
561
00:32:38,723 --> 00:32:42,420
All right, Finn, thanks.
That'll pay for half a ticket to nationals, so...
562
00:32:42,493 --> 00:32:44,757
still a long way to go.
563
00:32:44,829 --> 00:32:46,694
You all right? Okay.
564
00:32:46,764 --> 00:32:49,028
Now I believe it's time to hear...
565
00:32:49,100 --> 00:32:52,263
what the world's greatest love song
means to Miss Tina Cohen-Chang.
566
00:32:52,337 --> 00:32:54,498
- Come on up.
- Whoo!
567
00:32:54,572 --> 00:32:56,540
Is anyone else hot?
It's really stuffy in here.
568
00:32:56,607 --> 00:32:59,075
This is for you, Mike.
Happy Valentine's Day.
569
00:33:04,315 --> 00:33:09,378
# My funny valentine #
570
00:33:10,788 --> 00:33:15,555
# Sweet, comic valentine #
571
00:33:16,627 --> 00:33:23,191
# You make me smile with my heart #
572
00:33:29,007 --> 00:33:32,272
# Your looks are laughable #
573
00:33:34,212 --> 00:33:38,444
# Unphotographable #
574
00:33:42,220 --> 00:33:46,054
# Yet you're my favorite work of art #
575
00:33:50,828 --> 00:33:53,763
# Is your figure less than Greek? #
576
00:33:56,868 --> 00:33:59,234
# Is your mouth a little weak? #
577
00:34:00,972 --> 00:34:03,372
# When you open-#
578
00:34:04,976 --> 00:34:08,707
# Are you smart? #
579
00:34:08,780 --> 00:34:11,214
# Stay-#
Oh, God.
580
00:34:11,282 --> 00:34:14,342
# Valentine #
581
00:34:14,419 --> 00:34:15,977
# Stay #
582
00:34:18,256 --> 00:34:23,216
# Every day is Valentine's Day
when I'm with you ##
583
00:34:23,294 --> 00:34:24,529
- I'm so overcome with love.
- Okay, wow. That was... powerful.
584
00:34:24,529 --> 00:34:26,588
- I'm so overcome with love.
- Okay, wow. That was... powerful.
585
00:34:26,664 --> 00:34:29,030
- I love you, Mike Chang.
- Almost too powerful.
586
00:34:29,100 --> 00:34:32,536
Mr. Schue, can I be excused?
I don't feel well.
587
00:34:32,603 --> 00:34:35,128
Me either. I feel sick.
588
00:34:35,206 --> 00:34:36,696
Let me guess.
589
00:34:36,774 --> 00:34:39,140
You have a sore throat, your glands
are swollen, and you're feverish.
590
00:34:40,344 --> 00:34:42,938
Yeah. Yeah, which is why
I need to go to the nurse.
591
00:34:43,014 --> 00:34:45,414
It sounds like you have mono.
592
00:34:45,483 --> 00:34:47,280
Otherwise known as "the kissing disease."
593
00:34:47,351 --> 00:34:50,946
But you know what really helps spread it?
A little tongue.
594
00:34:51,022 --> 00:34:55,083
Which is weird, because it sounds
like Quinn here has it too.
595
00:34:55,159 --> 00:34:57,320
I was there when they kissed.
It was just a peck.
596
00:34:57,395 --> 00:35:01,331
So how about we stop talking about
tonguing, and Finn and I go to the nurse?
597
00:35:01,432 --> 00:35:04,765
You know what?
I think that is a capital idea.
598
00:35:08,940 --> 00:35:11,431
I've cheated twice in my life.
599
00:35:11,509 --> 00:35:13,704
The first time, I got pregnant.
600
00:35:13,778 --> 00:35:17,043
The second time, I got mono.
601
00:35:17,115 --> 00:35:20,346
I think the universe is trying
to tell me something.
602
00:35:20,418 --> 00:35:25,048
Maybe. But I think Sam likes you enough
to believe whatever story you told him.
603
00:35:25,123 --> 00:35:27,250
Santana is such a bitch.
604
00:35:27,325 --> 00:35:30,852
It looks like mono to me. I called your mothers.
605
00:35:30,928 --> 00:35:34,056
You can hang here till they pick you up,
but no kissing.
606
00:35:39,170 --> 00:35:41,001
I'm not done with us yet.
607
00:35:43,241 --> 00:35:45,709
You have to stop.
608
00:35:45,776 --> 00:35:50,804
Nothing can happen between us until I figure
out what's going on with me and Sam...
609
00:35:50,882 --> 00:35:53,180
and you figure out
what's going on with you and Rachel.
610
00:35:53,251 --> 00:35:57,051
But... nothing's...
611
00:35:57,121 --> 00:35:58,713
Nothing's going on with me and Rachel.
612
00:35:58,823 --> 00:36:03,954
All I know is that
when I don't catch you staring at me...
613
00:36:03,995 --> 00:36:05,792
you're staring at her.
614
00:36:12,003 --> 00:36:14,699
- Hello, Lauren.
- What's with the Chilly Willy, Puckerman?
615
00:36:15,806 --> 00:36:17,433
Honestly!
616
00:36:17,508 --> 00:36:19,908
I'm not used to getting stood up.
617
00:36:19,977 --> 00:36:22,537
Last night? Breadstix?
618
00:36:22,613 --> 00:36:24,638
Oh, we had a date, didn't we?
619
00:36:24,715 --> 00:36:26,910
Look, I get it.
620
00:36:26,984 --> 00:36:29,475
You've been hurt by guys before,
but I'm telling you, I'm not like that.
621
00:36:29,554 --> 00:36:31,454
First of all,
you got a girl pregnant last year...
622
00:36:31,522 --> 00:36:34,218
so, uh, yeah, you are.
623
00:36:34,292 --> 00:36:37,455
And "B": What makes you assume guys
treat me badly? I can take care of myself.
624
00:36:37,528 --> 00:36:39,393
That's what I like about you.
625
00:36:39,463 --> 00:36:42,227
I'm not into you because you...
have curves.
626
00:36:42,300 --> 00:36:45,792
I- What I like is that you're a girl
who's an even bigger badass than me.
627
00:36:47,605 --> 00:36:50,369
Can I be honest with you? I like you.
628
00:36:50,441 --> 00:36:52,068
I used to think you were smokin'...
629
00:36:52,143 --> 00:36:54,941
but a lot of that had to do with the fact
that I thought you were mixed race...
630
00:36:55,012 --> 00:36:57,105
and that never fails to get me goin'.
631
00:36:57,181 --> 00:37:00,309
Here's the thing, Puckerman. I'm not just
lookin' for somebody to fool around with...
632
00:37:00,418 --> 00:37:03,353
so if you're really into me,
you gotta take it slow.
633
00:37:04,655 --> 00:37:06,316
I suppose I could give that a shot.
634
00:37:06,390 --> 00:37:08,449
Then you're on for Valentine's Day.
635
00:37:08,526 --> 00:37:10,790
As friends.
636
00:37:17,101 --> 00:37:20,434
- Where's Quinn?
- Uh.
637
00:37:20,504 --> 00:37:23,940
Her mom picked her up a few hours ago.
638
00:37:24,008 --> 00:37:26,340
Quinn really is very pretty.
639
00:37:28,045 --> 00:37:30,809
You don't have to do that, you know.
640
00:37:30,881 --> 00:37:32,974
No. I would do it for anyone.
641
00:37:34,452 --> 00:37:36,352
She's prettier than me.
642
00:37:37,922 --> 00:37:40,720
Would you stop?
You're beautiful.
643
00:37:43,094 --> 00:37:44,789
I know she is.
644
00:37:44,862 --> 00:37:47,797
It meant so much to me
that you chose me over her.
645
00:37:47,865 --> 00:37:50,891
Girls like me don't get chosen
over girls like her very much.
646
00:37:52,136 --> 00:37:56,038
Did you kiss her? Like Santana said?
647
00:37:56,107 --> 00:37:59,167
Yeah, yeah. But I- I just needed
to get it out of my system.
648
00:37:59,277 --> 00:38:01,575
So what did it feel like...
649
00:38:02,647 --> 00:38:04,137
when you kissed her?
650
00:38:05,883 --> 00:38:07,714
Fireworks.
651
00:38:07,785 --> 00:38:10,310
Did you see fireworks when you kissed me?
652
00:38:18,429 --> 00:38:20,897
- Rachel, wait.
- No.
653
00:38:20,965 --> 00:38:22,899
It's good. Thank you.
654
00:38:22,967 --> 00:38:26,698
Look, you've given me the
strength to move on.
655
00:38:26,771 --> 00:38:29,740
I know now that there's...
nothing here for me anymore.
656
00:38:29,807 --> 00:38:31,570
That's not the truth.
657
00:38:32,276 --> 00:38:33,766
I still...
658
00:38:33,844 --> 00:38:36,574
I'm just-
I'm so confused in my head right now.
659
00:38:36,647 --> 00:38:38,740
No, it's okay. Look, I understand.
660
00:38:38,816 --> 00:38:42,377
And now I'm free to pursue my dreams
without anything holding me back.
661
00:38:42,586 --> 00:38:47,387
And you've actually inspired my song selection
for this week's love song assignment.
662
00:38:48,693 --> 00:38:49,751
Feel better, Finn.
663
00:38:50,261 --> 00:38:53,788
##
664
00:38:58,135 --> 00:39:02,037
# Do you ever feel like a plastic bag? #
665
00:39:02,106 --> 00:39:03,733
# Drifting through the wind #
666
00:39:03,808 --> 00:39:05,605
# Wanting to start again #
667
00:39:05,676 --> 00:39:09,772
# Do you ever feel
Feel so paper-thin? #
668
00:39:09,847 --> 00:39:13,374
# Like a house of cards
one blow from caving in #
669
00:39:13,451 --> 00:39:17,251
# Do you ever feel already buried deep? #
670
00:39:17,321 --> 00:39:21,587
# Six-feet-under screams
but no one seems to hear a thing #
671
00:39:21,659 --> 00:39:25,095
# Do you know that there's
still a chance for you? #
672
00:39:25,162 --> 00:39:27,187
# 'Cause there's a spark in you #
673
00:39:27,264 --> 00:39:31,997
# You just gotta ignite the light #
674
00:39:32,069 --> 00:39:35,561
# And let it shine #
675
00:39:35,639 --> 00:39:39,575
# Just own the night #
676
00:39:39,643 --> 00:39:43,010
# Like the Fourth of July #
677
00:39:43,080 --> 00:39:47,073
# 'Cause, baby, you're a firework #
678
00:39:47,151 --> 00:39:50,848
# Come on, show 'em what you're worth #
679
00:39:50,921 --> 00:39:54,379
# Make 'em go, "Oh, oh, oh" #
680
00:39:54,458 --> 00:39:58,155
# As you shoot across the sky-y-y #
681
00:39:58,229 --> 00:40:02,529
# Baby, you're a firework #
682
00:40:02,600 --> 00:40:06,331
# Come on
Let your colors burst #
683
00:40:06,404 --> 00:40:09,635
# Make 'em go, "Oh, oh, oh" #
684
00:40:09,707 --> 00:40:13,370
# You're gonna leave 'em goin',
"Oh, oh, oh" #
685
00:40:14,278 --> 00:40:17,873
# Baby, you're a firework #
686
00:40:17,948 --> 00:40:22,009
# Come on
Let your colors burst #
687
00:40:22,086 --> 00:40:25,055
# Make 'em go, "Oh, oh, oh" #
688
00:40:25,122 --> 00:40:30,287
# You're gonna leave 'em goin',
"Oh, oh, oh" #
689
00:40:30,361 --> 00:40:33,023
# Boom, boom, boom #
690
00:40:33,097 --> 00:40:37,693
# Even brighter than the moon, moon, moon #
691
00:40:37,768 --> 00:40:40,760
# Boom, boom, boom #
692
00:40:40,838 --> 00:40:44,865
# Even brighter than the
moon, moon, moon ##
693
00:40:52,750 --> 00:40:54,274
Mind if we join you?
694
00:40:54,351 --> 00:40:57,411
I would love that.
695
00:40:57,488 --> 00:41:01,424
Testing, one, two, three. Testing, one, two, three.
696
00:41:01,525 --> 00:41:04,858
All right. So happy Valentine's
Day, everybody.
697
00:41:04,895 --> 00:41:07,659
For those of you Breadstix patrons
who don't know who I am...
698
00:41:07,731 --> 00:41:12,725
I am Kurt Hummel, and welcome
to my first ever Lonely Hearts Club dinner.
699
00:41:12,803 --> 00:41:14,703
Whether you are single with hope...
700
00:41:14,772 --> 00:41:18,833
or madly in love and are here because
I forced you to come out and support me...
701
00:41:18,909 --> 00:41:21,605
sit back and enjoy.
702
00:41:21,679 --> 00:41:25,012
And to all the singles out there,
this is our year.
703
00:41:26,517 --> 00:41:30,385
- # How can I tell you #
- # I can't explain #
704
00:41:30,454 --> 00:41:33,753
- # About my loved one? #
- # The feeling's plain to me Say, can't you see? #
705
00:41:33,824 --> 00:41:39,421
- # How can I tell you #
- # Ah, he gave me more He gave it all to me #
706
00:41:39,497 --> 00:41:41,829
- # About my loved one? #
- # Say, can't you see? #
707
00:41:41,899 --> 00:41:47,531
# You'd think that people would have
had enough of silly love songs #
708
00:41:47,605 --> 00:41:49,266
##
709
00:41:49,340 --> 00:41:53,606
# But I look around me
and I see it isn't so #
710
00:41:54,612 --> 00:41:56,477
# Oh, no #
711
00:41:56,547 --> 00:42:02,281
# Some people wanna fill the world
with silly love songs #
712
00:42:04,021 --> 00:42:07,650
# And what's wrong with that? #
713
00:42:08,392 --> 00:42:11,793
# I'd like to know #
714
00:42:11,862 --> 00:42:18,563
# 'Cause here I go again #
715
00:42:20,070 --> 00:42:26,031
# I love you #
716
00:42:27,411 --> 00:42:34,317
# I love you #
717
00:42:35,486 --> 00:42:37,647
# Love doesn't come in a minute #
718
00:42:37,721 --> 00:42:39,484
# Doesn't come in a minute #
719
00:42:39,557 --> 00:42:43,357
- # Sometimes it doesn't come at all #
- # Doesn't come at all #
720
00:42:43,427 --> 00:42:47,124
- # I only know that when I'm in it #
- # Only know when I'm in it #
721
00:42:47,197 --> 00:42:49,062
- # It isn't silly #
- # At all #
722
00:42:49,133 --> 00:42:51,033
- # No, it isn't silly #
- # At all #
723
00:42:51,101 --> 00:42:55,868
# Love isn't silly at all #
724
00:42:55,940 --> 00:42:57,601
# Not at all #
725
00:42:57,675 --> 00:43:01,042
##
726
00:43:04,214 --> 00:43:09,811
# I love you #
727
00:43:11,589 --> 00:43:17,528
# I love you #
728
00:43:19,630 --> 00:43:22,656
- # I can't explain #
- # How can I tell you #
729
00:43:22,733 --> 00:43:26,999
- # The feeling's plain to me Say, can't you see? #
- # About my loved one? #
730
00:43:27,071 --> 00:43:32,737
- # Ah, she gave me more She gave it all to me #
- # How can I tell you #
731
00:43:32,810 --> 00:43:35,176
- # Now, can't you see? #
- # About my loved one? #
732
00:43:35,245 --> 00:43:37,236
##
733
00:43:40,718 --> 00:43:42,252
##
734
00:43:42,252 --> 00:43:44,345
##
735
00:43:53,063 --> 00:43:56,931
##
736
00:43:57,001 --> 00:44:01,438
##
737
00:44:19,023 --> 00:44:20,490
##
738
00:44:27,931 --> 00:44:28,920
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