sync a corrected by f1nc0 --- www.addic7ed.com ---
Shrek The Halls 2007 DVDrip 25fps
There. That's better.
(Seals & Crofts - "Summer Breeze")
♪ Summer breeze ♪
All clean.
♪ makes me feel fine ♪
♪ blowing through the jasmine of my mind ♪
♪ He sees you when you're sleepin' ♪
♪ he knows when you're awake ♪
What are you doing here, Donkey, and what are you talking about?
I'm talking about Santa Claus.
You know, there's only 159 days left till Christmas,
- so you better be good. - I'd better be good?
How about this? You better be scarce. Now go on.
I don't care about Christmas.
♪ Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way ♪
- Aah! Donkey! - There's only 51 days left till Christmas.
Now you need to get your big green butt in gear
and go get your marshmallows because everybody knows,
without marshmallows, sweet potatoes are nothing.
Aah! Enough. I don't care about any of this nonsense. Now shoo!
Okay, okay, but don't say I didn't say I told u so.
♪ Smashing through the snow ♪ - Aah!
♪ laughing all the way, ha ha ha ♪
Oh, man. It's finally here, tomorrow's Christmas eve.
- You got everything ready? - No.
You mean you haven't trimmed your stockings
- Or hung your chestnuts or roasted the tree? - No.
- Or figgified your pudding? - Donkey, will you get it through your thick head?
No one here gives a hoot about Christmas!
A white Christmas! Oh, how perfect,
and it's our first one together as a family.
Isn't this exciting?
Uh, oh, yeah. How about that?
Ahem. Princess, I think there's a little something
- Shrek needs to tell you. - Don't ruin the surprise for her, Donkey.
Surprise? Oh, I love surprises.
You're the best. Come on. Let's go make some cookies.
Okay. You a dead man. You know that, right?
Um, hold that thought. I'll be right back.
♪ get a move on, you'd better run ♪
♪ if you don't get there soon everything will be gone ♪
Oh, good. You're still open.
No. No. Uh, we're closing now.
- Merry Christmas. - Wait, wait, wait. I need your help.
I have to make a Christmas,
and I have no idea what it is or how to do it.
Why didn't you say so? That's super.
I know all about Christmas, and I have just the book for you--
"Christmas for village idiots." it's all spelled out. See?
"Step one--decorate the house. Step two--the stockings by the fireplace."
"Step three-- the Christmas feast." - Mmm! What's that?
- Step four? That's the Christmas tree. - The tree goes inside the house?
Anyway, "step five--the telling of the Christmas story."
This is the step that says, "I have created
the perfect Christmas for my perfect family perfectly."
See? Family by the fire. Everyone cozy and warm.
- Happy, happy. Voilá ! - Um, sure.
Look, long story short, it's all right here.
- It's no problem. - Oh, perfect.
I mean, how hard can it be? I didn't get the eggnog!
- Closed? What do you mean? - We're closed.
- Sorry. - Do you have a Dwight the Knight action figure?
Marshmallows! Marshmallows!
Sweet potatoes are nothing without marshmallows.
- Bye-bye. Have a super Christmas. - Oh!
What? Oh.
- Ooh! Ah! - Honey, is that you?
Oh! Oh, Fiona,
What are you doing up so early?
- Ooh! - Oh! Wait. Are you okay?
I'm all right. Heh.
- What are you... - I...
Ooh. Are you decorating?
Uh, yeah, that. Surprised?
Yes.
Well, this is our first Christmas together as a family,
and you know, I just want to make sure
that it's... Perfect.
Shrek, I think it's beautiful.
- It's passable. - It's horrible!
- Oh, Donkey! - You know, they usually just toilet paper and run away,
but whoever did this means business. Now you gotta gerid
of all this junk and get yourself some tinsel and doilies
- and ribbons and maybe some of those plastic reindeer-- - What exactly is it you wanted today?
Oh, come on. It's Christmas eve,
And I brought you a little somethin'.
Go ahead. Take a couple. I brought plenty for everybody.
Oh. Isn't that... nice?
Well, thanks for stopping by for the brief visit,
but as you can see, there's a lot of work to do.
Now it's just like him to wait till the last minute,
But don't you worry, princess. If there's one thing I know, it's Christmas.
Now Shrek's gonna want my help, and he's gonna want my advice,
- and he's definitely gonna want-- - Actually, I think what he really wants
- is a nice family Christmas. - Oh! A family Christmas.
Yeah. It's the first one with the kids.
Oh, don't say another word, princess. I know exactly what you mean.
I got a lot to do now, so I better get moving.
Thank you, Donkey, uh, and Merry Christmas!
All right, Merry Christmas!
♪ Love and joy come to you, and to me, some waffles, too ♪
Donkey's right. It's Christmas Eve.
How am I ever gonna get this done in time?
This is gonna be the best Christmas Ever,
And we're going to do it together, so come on.
(the Waitresses) # Bah, humbug, no, that's too strong #
♪ 'cause it is my favorite holiday ♪
♪ but all this year's been a busy blur ♪
# don't think I have the energy so on with the boots #
♪ back out in the snow to the only all-night grocery ♪
♪ when what, to my wondering eyes should appear? ♪
♪ in the line is that guy I've been chasing all year ♪
♪ then suddenly, we laughed and laughed ♪
♪ caught on to what was happening ♪
♪ that Christmas magic's brought this tale to a very happy ending ♪
Everything looks so good. Oh, nice job, honey.
- Well, we all did it together. - Da-da.
And now what would the perfect Christmas be without a Christmas story?
Ahem. 'It was the night before Christmas, and all through the house,
not a creature was stirring...
- What? - Merry Christmas, Shrek!
- Oh, not you. - We're here to smother you with Christmas love.
Absolutely not. Bad Donkey. Go home!
- Now how are you gonna have Christmas without your family? - So good to see you again.
- Seasons greetings. - Happy holiday. - Merry christsmas.
Well, what a nice surprise.
Oh, yeah. Oh!
Okay, I will assume the position.
- I am a joy-filled swine! - Yay for the season of love!
Oh, man. Don't you know this is where Christmas stockings go?
- You can't be hanging your dirty laundry up here. - Donkey, don't touch anything.
How are we gonna roast chestnuts on this little bitty fire?
Hey, baby, you mind?
- Oh, boy! - This way, gents.
That was our supper!
- Who wants sweet, buttery... - Ow! Hey!
Egg sandwich?
Did you hurt yourself when you fell out of heaven?
Where are we going to put it? I don't know. Where do you want to put it?
- Well, let's put it over here. - No, that is not with the feng shui.
Come on, everybody. Let's dance!
(Fatboy slim) # yes, we can, can, can, can, can #
♪ can, can, can, can! ♪ oh, oh ♪
♪ oh, oh oh, oh ♪
Occupied!
It's me. Shrek?
Yes?
Come back to the party. Please?
Mm, I don't think that'd be such a good idea.
Come on. It's not that bad.
Okay, I know you're not a party person, but--
But what? This is not the kind of Christmas I had in mind.
They're our friends, Shrek. They all mean well.
How many babies did Fiona have?
- She has babies? - I don't know.
- I better get back to the house. - I'm surprised we have a house to go back to.
Are you coming?
- Oh, I can hardly wait. - Oh, finally!
(Wagner's "Rid the Valkyries') Ja! Look at him go!
- Excuse me. Excuse me. - Excuse you for what?
I don't feel very good. Ahh! I feel better now.
Ooh! A chocolate chip. Mmm!
Sweetheart.
(Journey's "Don't stop believin'")
- Mind if I cut in? - Oh!
♪ Don't stop believin' ♪
♪ go up and down all the time ♪
♪ hold on to the feeling, streetlight people ♪
♪ I'm a little Christmas angel ♪
Hey there, my sweeties.
Aw. Would you like daddy to finish the story for you?
Yeah?
The children were nestled all snug in their beds,
- while visions of sugarplums-- - Oh, are you telling them "the night before Christmas"?
That's the best Christmas story ever,
and I'm the best teller ever. I tell it better than anybody.
- Donkey. Donkey. - I got it committed to memorization.
All right, everybody. Everybody, gather around.
Donkey, wait. I'm supposed to tell the Christmas story.
'twas the night before Christmas, and I spent all the day
finishing up on my Christmas display.
Now missing all this would be nothing but tragic,
so just follow me, and I'll show you the magic.
Now out in the yard, in the glorious clutter,
Is a spectacle there that'll make your heart flutter.
With 20-foot cheese balls and a big eggnog fountain
and yodeling elves on an ambrosia mountain... Yodel-oh-ee!
A stage where acrobats jump, leap and prance
and honor the day through interpretive dance.
Hoo-ah!
But just when you think the display is complete,
the Christmas parade comes right down the street
with holiday floats all in silver and blue,
with sugarplum fairies and a reindeer or two.
There's a baton-twirling snowman all happy and perky,
magical peacocks and a dancing roast turkey.
(C + C Music Factory) # Everybody, dance now #
And right when you think that you've just seen it all,
Comes a huge waffle Santa that's 50 feet tall!
Ho-ho-ho!
With syrup and butter, the sight just amazes,
as it's flanked by a choir, all singing its praises.
("Hallelujah chorus") # Waffle Santa #
♪ waffle Santa ♪
♪ waffle Santa, waffle Santa ♪
♪ sa--ah--anta, Santa claus ♪
- Donkey. - Santa?
Donkey!
- Oh! - Very inappropriate, amigo. Please allow me.
Oh, Puss, not you, too.
In my homeland, we tell a very different tale
of the Santa Nicholas.
He's not made of waffles. This Santa was suave.
He was nothing like that.
The Santa I know was a hot latin cat.
He was dressed all in fur from his head to his paws,
and he stood there heroic, a real Santa claws.
Red are his boots...
- And so is his cape. - Olé!
His sword is a cane that tastes like crab cake.
He wears a fine belt and a leather cravat.
And there's a cute fuzzy thing which hangs down from his hat.
I have shamed myself.
- Olé! - All right, everybody,
If you leave now, you can beat the holiday traffic.
Oh, phooey with all your sunshine and lollipops.
- Where I come from, Christmas is a nightmare!
Ahem. 'twas the night before Christmas, and the prettiest sights
Were my sweetheart beside me and the bright Christmas lights.
Until they got home, and they looked at the cadoor handle,
And they found... a hook!
Aah!
Gingy, cut it out. You're really giving me the creeps.
Oh, come on. I was just teasin'.
Come here, you.
Well, gingy, I couldn't stay mad at you.
What was that?
Oh, no, you don't. I'm not falling for that again.
No, I'm really, really, seriously not kidding.
Whoa! Gingy!
No! No!
- Aah! - No!
- Suzy! - Aah!
No! No! No!
That's the most ridiculous thing
I've ever heard. Now you know that's not how it goes.
You weren't there!
- All right, everyone, I've had just about enough. - Da-da.
All I wanted was a nice Christmas with MY family!
And that's exactly why we're all here.
Now come on. Let's finish telling my story.
Oh, no, Donkey. That's not what I meant, and get out of my chair.
Oh, hey. What's this?
- Donkey, let go of the book. - Why are you whispering?
I'm not kidding, Donkey. Give me the book!
- Ooh! - Heimlich!
- Ja? - No, heimlich!
- Oh, ja? - Ay!
- Whoa! - Oh! My eye!
- Oh! - Ooh, boy!
- D'oh! - Oh!
Stop, drop and roll, Shrek.
Somebody get some water. I got it! I got it!
- Don't worry, Shrek. Everything is under control. - No!
Oh, boy.
Ooh! The tea is ready.
- Out! - Run, everybody, run!
I want everybody out of my house right now!
- Run, run, as fast as you can! - Aah! Ow!
Yeah, well, that's a real nice way to treat your guests on Christmas,
and if you think I'm gonna give you a present now,
you are sadly mistaken.
You want to give me a present? Then go away! That's all I wanted!
- Fine! I'm going! - Good. Then go!
You go and have yourself a Merry Christmas, Ebenezer Shrek!
And a "bah, humbug" to you, too!
- We could come to our house. - Ja! We have plenty of schnitzel.
Now maybe we can...
Fiona, where are you going?
Shrek, you just kicked everybody out on Christmas.
Well, that wasn't Christmas. That was chaos.
Look, I-I know it didn't go like you wanted.
What I wanted was a perfect hristmas for me and my family.
That was our family.
You call that a family? That was a natural disaster.
On Christmas, that's how it works. Yes, it was crowded.
Yes, it got a little out of hand.
- Fiona, they lit me on fire. - Shrek...
I had everything under control
until they showed up and ruined my Christmas.
- Your Christmas? - I mean, our Christmas, for you and the babies.
- Christmas is not just about you or me... - Da.
Or even the babies. You just don't get it.
I have to go. I need to apologize to our friends.
Fiona, wait.
(Heels' "The stars shine in the sky tonight" playing)
♪ December is a lonely month ♪
♪ in a year of lonely days ♪
♪ it's hard to tell which way is up ♪
♪ or down or out or through the hills ♪
♪ it's not where you're coming from ♪
♪ it's where you're going to ♪
I still don't understand why Shrek had to be so mean and cranky.
- We were all just trying to do what you wanted us to do. - What are you talking about?
What you said this morning, princess. You know, you and Shrek wanted to have a big,
- Oh', noisy family Christmas. - No, I said it was our first chrimas together as a family.
A family, right. That's me and everybody else.
Then he gotta go and los s temper like that.
You know, Donkey, none of us really asked Shrek
- what he wanted. - Well, I must agree with the princess,
and, you, especially, were no Christmas angel.
- You know, I don't remember asking you anything. - Donkey.
I'm sorry, princess. You're right.
- Even still, Shrek didn't have to be so-- - What?
Pigheaded, stubborn, mean-- Well, maybe I am all those things,
but I'm an ogre, okay? So here's the thing.
I'm sorry you took getting kicked out of my house the wrong way.
No, wait. What I meant to say is,
I know you were all just trying to be helpful in your own irritating fashion.
Ay, caramba.
Uh, some people can't help being annoying.
Shrek.
Look, I shouldn't have lost my temper back there.
Apology accepted. Let's go eat.
Hey, wait a minute. There's something more to this.
Come on now. What's going on?
Look, all I wanted was to make this perfect for my family,
but I don't even know what Christmas means.
The thing is, this is my first Christmas, too.
Whoa. Hold up, Shrek.
- You mean to tell me that you never had-- - No.
- Not even one? - No.
You mean no chestnuts, no Santa, no presents, no stockings?
- No nut cakes? - Donkey! No, none of that.
Ogres don't celebrate Christmas.
Ogres don't celebrate anything.
Oh, man, now I'm all emotional.
Come here, Shrek give me a hug.
All right, that's close enough.
Okay, all right, I just guess
I got a little excited about Christmas
and all the presents and mistletoe
And... everything, and I forgot that it's...
it's about us all being together. I'm--I'm sorry, Shrek.
I know, Donkey, and--and I'm sorry
It ended up in a great big fight.
Oh, Christmas is all about big fights.
My mama used to always say, "Christmas ain't Christmas
till somebody cries." usually, that someone's me.
Boss, there is no right way to do Christmas.
- You just do it. - Ja! Mit schnitzel!
- And eggnog. - And cheese.
- And family. - Yeah, and family.
So... despite the fact that you drive me crazy at times--
Yes, Donkey, I'm looking at you--
It would mean a lot me if you'd all come back and join us.
Okay, I guess I deserved that... All right, don't push your luck.
They got you good, Shrek
Hey! Now that wasn't even funny. Who did that?
Well, that's the last of the spare blankets.
Uh, sorry, but this is my spot.
I never get the good spot, so I specifically called--oh!
So we are pigs. Pigs in the blanket, ja?
- Ja! - Ja!
- So this is funny then, ja? - Ja! Ja!
- This is funny. - Ja!
- Yep. That's a good one.
Good night, everyone. It's time for lights out.
Lights out? We can't go to sleep yet.
We haven't heard a bedtime story.
- Isn't that right, everybody? - Shrek, yeah!
All right, all right. Don't need this.
Okay.
'twas the night before Christmas,
Not a swamp rat did creep.
as mother and babe played kazoo in their sleep.
Now the sight of the house would make any ogre droop,
for it was sickeningly sweet as unicorn poop.
Yet who was arriving to help this lost cause?
the foul, the vile... and handsome ogre claus.
Hey. How's it goin'?
He looked all around and scratched at his beard and said...
and said...
This place is worse than I thought-- uh, feared.
So he grabbed up his belly and screwed up his face,
and let loose a...
That transformed the place.
With a gleam in his eye, his work here was done,
and then to the babies he gave one by one,
a festering bottle of stinky swamp juice
and for mommy, a kiss and a good Christmas goose.
Ooh! 5 degrees. 20 minutes per pound.
Then digging a finger inside of his nose
and giving a nod, up the chimney he rose.
And I heard him exclaim as he drove out of sight,
"smelly Christmas to all, and to all a gross night."
Ho-ho-ho-ho!
Ho-ho-ho! Ho-ho-ho!
Ho-ho-ho!
Santa? Aah!
Ho-ho-ho! Ho-ho-ho!
Ho-ho-ho-ho! Oh, ho-ho-ho-ho!
Oh, ho-ho!
("Deck the halls")
♪ Shrek the halls with Puss and Donkey ♪
♪ fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la ♪ ♪ Hey ♪
♪ Christmas time can be so wonky ♪
♪ fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la ♪
♪ ....... ♪
sync a corrected by f1nc0 --- www.addic7ed.com ---