1 00:00:01,075 --> 00:00:04,336 (June) I've always been someone Who can wear a lot of different hats, 2 00:00:04,456 --> 00:00:06,215 Like here in apartment 23. (beeps) 3 00:00:06,335 --> 00:00:08,488 Sometimes I need to be a mixologist... 4 00:00:08,977 --> 00:00:11,053 Sometimes I need to be a teacher... 5 00:00:16,297 --> 00:00:20,035 And sometimes I need to be the bearer of bad news. 6 00:00:21,383 --> 00:00:22,741 What up? (sighs) 7 00:00:23,126 --> 00:00:24,712 I'm sorry to have to tell you this, but... 8 00:00:24,758 --> 00:00:26,080 You decided to get a pixie cut? 9 00:00:26,104 --> 00:00:27,013 What? No. 10 00:00:27,049 --> 00:00:28,938 Oh, thank God. My heart is still racing. 11 00:00:29,239 --> 00:00:30,875 Feel that? That's fear. 12 00:00:31,908 --> 00:00:34,258 Well, what I was gonna tell you was... (bottles clink, cabinet closes) 13 00:00:34,660 --> 00:00:35,596 Your plant died. 14 00:00:35,643 --> 00:00:37,828 What plant? I hate plants. I don't have no plant. 15 00:00:37,948 --> 00:00:40,523 Sure you do. You got one about a month ago. 16 00:00:40,978 --> 00:00:46,310 I'm all about the environment. I fancy myself a tree hugger. 17 00:00:46,560 --> 00:00:50,085 Oh, right. Ethan. He was my emergency contact for a month. 18 00:00:50,205 --> 00:00:53,321 Well, I don't know how it died. I watered it all the time. 19 00:00:54,202 --> 00:00:55,921 With water from your goldfish's bowl? 20 00:00:56,041 --> 00:00:58,161 What goldfish? I hate goldfish. I don't have no goldfish. 21 00:00:59,070 --> 00:01:01,457 (clinks) Ooh! 22 00:01:01,520 --> 00:01:03,822 (chuckles) I'm all about the goldfish. Wanna have sex? 23 00:01:05,989 --> 00:01:09,256 Weird fair. A lot of weird booths at that weird fair. 24 00:01:09,914 --> 00:01:10,877 (sighs) 25 00:01:10,929 --> 00:01:13,070 Well, remind me never to trust you 26 00:01:13,121 --> 00:01:15,371 With taking care of anything of mine, Chloe. (chuckles) 27 00:01:15,491 --> 00:01:16,922 Oh. What's that? 28 00:01:17,965 --> 00:01:21,769 Mm. "Chloe, thanks for looking after my great-uncle in apartment 14." 29 00:01:22,019 --> 00:01:24,031 "He needs his daily shot of insulin." 30 00:01:24,774 --> 00:01:27,362 (siren wails in distance, police radio chatter) 31 00:01:27,410 --> 00:01:30,311 (Katie Hampton) ♪ I'm not perfect, I'm no snitch ♪ 32 00:01:30,367 --> 00:01:32,509 ♪ but I can tell you ♪ (whispers) ♪ she's a... ♪ 33 00:01:32,551 --> 00:01:36,404 (buzzer) ♪ ba-da-da-da-da-ba, ba-da-ba ♪ 34 00:01:36,434 --> 00:01:38,605 Sync & corrections by into-the-light. www.addic7ed.com 35 00:01:38,665 --> 00:01:40,967 And we analyze companies' viabilities for inclusion 36 00:01:41,002 --> 00:01:42,978 in long-and short-term mutual funds. 37 00:01:43,098 --> 00:01:45,543 Ms. Berman, if you give me this opportunity, 38 00:01:45,663 --> 00:01:48,332 I will show you how committed I am To Berman, Marks and Mathers. 39 00:01:48,377 --> 00:01:50,277 Even though this is an unpaid internship, 40 00:01:50,330 --> 00:01:52,573 It requires 7 days a week, 24 hours a day. 41 00:01:52,693 --> 00:01:54,431 - Okay. - When I sleep, which is rare, 44 00:01:58,344 --> 00:02:00,572 I don't have any pets, and my only hobby is 45 00:02:00,612 --> 00:02:02,549 The seasonal raising of window box pansies. 46 00:02:02,621 --> 00:02:03,449 - Stop it. - I will. 47 00:02:03,476 --> 00:02:03,992 Excellent. 48 00:02:04,212 --> 00:02:07,357 You will also be required to do a few personal things for me... 49 00:02:07,538 --> 00:02:09,862 Pick up my dry cleaning, meet with my contractor. 50 00:02:09,902 --> 00:02:11,082 How are you at giving haircuts? 51 00:02:11,127 --> 00:02:12,353 Great. I'm great at it. 52 00:02:12,624 --> 00:02:13,827 You start tomorrow. 53 00:02:17,377 --> 00:02:18,332 - Burma. - Nice. 54 00:02:18,452 --> 00:02:19,867 - Uzbekistan. - Awesome. 55 00:02:19,940 --> 00:02:21,172 - Sweden. - Great. 56 00:02:21,199 --> 00:02:22,552 Not a country. That's a crab. 57 00:02:22,596 --> 00:02:23,856 Good for you! (chuckles) 58 00:02:23,888 --> 00:02:24,813 You're so smart! (door opens) 59 00:02:24,847 --> 00:02:26,791 I got the internship! (chuckles) 60 00:02:26,810 --> 00:02:29,081 If I nail this, I'll be back in the game. 61 00:02:29,282 --> 00:02:29,986 Of course, it's unpaid, 62 00:02:30,030 --> 00:02:31,652 So there's that and working at the coffee shop, 63 00:02:31,690 --> 00:02:33,866 But it's okay, 'cause I'm a great multitasker. 64 00:02:34,182 --> 00:02:35,190 What... what... is that smoke? 65 00:02:35,423 --> 00:02:37,724 Oh, yeah. There's a small grease fire in the oven. 66 00:02:37,757 --> 00:02:40,606 What?! What? God! 67 00:02:40,726 --> 00:02:43,277 You have to smother the flames! 68 00:02:43,449 --> 00:02:45,366 Oh, my gosh! The whole place... 69 00:02:45,404 --> 00:02:48,428 (coughing) could have burned down! 70 00:02:48,479 --> 00:02:51,457 Well, I was gonna make a pizza, and then I passed out, 71 00:02:51,487 --> 00:02:53,972 And when I woke up, I was like, "I don't make pizzas." 72 00:02:54,032 --> 00:02:56,222 (laughs) She doesn't. 73 00:02:56,460 --> 00:03:00,125 Chloe, you have to learn to be more responsible. 74 00:03:00,159 --> 00:03:02,060 Do you not see a pattern here? 75 00:03:02,080 --> 00:03:03,702 You see something that you want, 76 00:03:03,822 --> 00:03:05,894 And then you abandon it because you get bored 77 00:03:05,918 --> 00:03:08,897 or because you're too selfish to care about anyone else! 78 00:03:09,017 --> 00:03:11,595 June, I'm interested in what you're saying. 79 00:03:11,655 --> 00:03:14,034 Write it down and put it in the basket next to the toilet. 80 00:03:14,064 --> 00:03:16,567 I'll get to it as soon as my busy season's over. 81 00:03:16,687 --> 00:03:19,247 "Busy season." You don't even have a job. 82 00:03:19,552 --> 00:03:23,435 In the span of 3 days, I make 70% of my annual income. 83 00:03:23,555 --> 00:03:25,429 When the U.N. holds its general assembly, 84 00:03:25,466 --> 00:03:28,087 I am the nightlife guide for dignitaries. 85 00:03:28,207 --> 00:03:30,065 I know just enough of every language to drink 86 00:03:30,123 --> 00:03:32,730 and dance with powerful men from all over the world. 87 00:03:32,783 --> 00:03:34,559 It's a ton of work, and, frankly... 88 00:03:34,608 --> 00:03:37,003 Me encuentra un peu bukan zhongfu. 89 00:03:37,649 --> 00:03:38,129 Huh? 90 00:03:38,249 --> 00:03:39,553 That means "I'm feeling overwhelmed" 91 00:03:39,599 --> 00:03:41,201 In spanish, french, and mandarin. 92 00:03:41,355 --> 00:03:43,400 I really wanted to wing some tagalog at you, 93 00:03:43,420 --> 00:03:45,041 But I don't know the pluperfect. 94 00:03:46,405 --> 00:03:49,383 Mm. (horn honks) 95 00:03:49,574 --> 00:03:51,093 (indistinct conversations) 96 00:03:51,213 --> 00:03:52,841 Oh, hey. You got the internship? 97 00:03:52,961 --> 00:03:54,736 That's great. I know you really wanted it. 98 00:03:54,804 --> 00:03:56,638 Yeah, I'm really excited, but it's gonna be a lot of work. 99 00:03:56,652 --> 00:03:58,220 - I think Pepper's stealing coffee. - What? 100 00:03:58,389 --> 00:04:01,609 It's, uh... hi. Pepper, hi. (chuckles) 101 00:04:01,962 --> 00:04:05,069 Wednesday. Hump day. It's hump day, dump day! 102 00:04:05,144 --> 00:04:06,657 (chuckles) (chuckles) 103 00:04:07,465 --> 00:04:09,668 (dishes and utensils clinking) (sighs, lowered voice) 104 00:04:09,727 --> 00:04:12,708 I can't fire her because we have a strict corporate dismissal policy, 105 00:04:12,742 --> 00:04:14,158 And she's extremely litigious. 106 00:04:14,201 --> 00:04:15,517 (lowered voice) Oh, that's right. 107 00:04:15,575 --> 00:04:18,280 She uses the word "allegedly" far too often. 108 00:04:18,563 --> 00:04:22,145 Um, someone allegedly ordered a pumpkin spice, no whip. 109 00:04:23,395 --> 00:04:25,637 I've installed security cameras to catch her in the act, 110 00:04:25,757 --> 00:04:27,222 So since I can't trust her, 111 00:04:27,246 --> 00:04:29,390 I'm gonna need you to take on more responsibility... 112 00:04:29,414 --> 00:04:31,317 Morning muffin deliveries, closing at night. 113 00:04:31,361 --> 00:04:33,988 - Do you think you can handle that? - Absolutely. (chuckles) 114 00:04:34,049 --> 00:04:36,023 The more I have to do, the better I get things done. 115 00:04:36,060 --> 00:04:39,314 In high school, I maintained a 4.0 G.P.A. 116 00:04:39,434 --> 00:04:41,362 While writing a musical. It was called "Kick it up!" 117 00:04:41,482 --> 00:04:42,492 It was about an all-girls kickball... 118 00:04:42,523 --> 00:04:44,596 So angry at her, I kinda don't care. 119 00:04:48,586 --> 00:04:52,356 Ohh. Sorry I'm late. Things have been so crazy. 120 00:04:52,476 --> 00:04:54,373 The general assembly convenes tomorrow, 121 00:04:54,425 --> 00:04:55,554 So I had to rent a monkey. 122 00:04:55,997 --> 00:04:58,173 Italians love it when I bring a monkey. 123 00:04:58,422 --> 00:04:59,376 Italians. 124 00:05:00,386 --> 00:05:01,409 Hmm. I said yes to a movie. 125 00:05:01,529 --> 00:05:03,263 It's called "In papa's arms." it's gonna be amazing. 126 00:05:03,383 --> 00:05:05,534 It stars the one and only Kiernan Shipka. 127 00:05:05,654 --> 00:05:06,684 What are those words? 128 00:05:06,804 --> 00:05:08,066 The little blonde girl from "Mad men." 129 00:05:08,256 --> 00:05:09,563 She's the one actor I've been dying to work with. 130 00:05:09,683 --> 00:05:10,807 She's got this quiet intensity. 131 00:05:10,927 --> 00:05:13,467 She's like a... like a small, blonde Daniel Day-Lewis. 132 00:05:13,702 --> 00:05:15,523 - Is the script any good? - No idea. 133 00:05:15,643 --> 00:05:17,572 I just said "yes" the minute I heard Kiernan was on board. 134 00:05:17,692 --> 00:05:19,398 Luther's reading it right now. He'll tell me what he thinks. 135 00:05:19,518 --> 00:05:21,201 - You can have Luther do that? - Of course. 136 00:05:21,321 --> 00:05:22,518 Luther reads all my scripts for me. 137 00:05:22,638 --> 00:05:24,433 "She slams the door behind her, 138 00:05:24,473 --> 00:05:27,498 Causing alex to get his hand stuck in the fondue pot." 139 00:05:27,618 --> 00:05:30,353 (chuckling) "Alex... 'a little help here?'" 140 00:05:30,669 --> 00:05:34,897 "fondue pot." I mean... "Check, please!" 141 00:05:35,120 --> 00:05:37,092 This is quality television. 142 00:05:37,212 --> 00:05:40,579 You can have Luther read you stories? 143 00:05:40,699 --> 00:05:43,556 Yeah. He's my assistant. He does whatever I need him to do... 144 00:05:43,935 --> 00:05:45,157 Eat questionable sushi, 145 00:05:45,277 --> 00:05:46,869 tickle my forearm while we're watching TV, 146 00:05:46,989 --> 00:05:48,243 carry me over puddles. 147 00:05:52,183 --> 00:05:54,355 (girl) uh-huh. Uh-huh. 148 00:05:54,847 --> 00:05:57,945 Okay. Thank you. All set. 149 00:05:58,065 --> 00:06:00,709 You have drinks with the foreign minister of Panama at 9:00. 150 00:06:00,726 --> 00:06:03,448 Then dancing and dessert with the ambassador to Myanmar at 10:00. 151 00:06:03,568 --> 00:06:07,199 Fine. Now we just need to find an outfit that works for both events. 152 00:06:07,242 --> 00:06:10,850 Panama likes it slutty, but Myanmar likes to keep it classy. 153 00:06:11,831 --> 00:06:13,501 What... what's going on? (gasps) 154 00:06:13,621 --> 00:06:16,120 oh, June. Great news. (thuds) 155 00:06:16,146 --> 00:06:17,516 I thought about what you said, 156 00:06:17,569 --> 00:06:20,241 About needing to be more responsible, so... 157 00:06:21,783 --> 00:06:22,883 I got an assistant. 158 00:06:23,092 --> 00:06:24,952 What? H-how can you afford that? 159 00:06:25,025 --> 00:06:27,361 Oh, it's free. I got a foster child. 160 00:06:28,941 --> 00:06:31,990 Molly, F.Y.I., we have a no flip-flop policy, 161 00:06:32,018 --> 00:06:34,799 So I'm gonna need to see you in a closed-toe shoe. 162 00:06:34,864 --> 00:06:36,197 Thank you. 163 00:06:36,817 --> 00:06:40,198 (whispers) it's amazing! (door closes) 164 00:06:41,017 --> 00:06:44,054 (whispering) What the hell? (slurps) You got a foster child?! 165 00:06:44,174 --> 00:06:44,552 Yep. 166 00:06:44,631 --> 00:06:47,228 I needed some assistant work during my busy season. 167 00:06:47,276 --> 00:06:49,859 I figured, why not a kid that needs a home? 168 00:06:51,223 --> 00:06:54,743 Now I know why people like kids so much. They're handy. 169 00:06:55,265 --> 00:06:57,483 But you'll see. You'll see when you have one. 170 00:06:57,946 --> 00:06:59,464 How did you do this? 171 00:06:59,864 --> 00:07:01,821 I know, right? Usually you have to be on the list 172 00:07:01,855 --> 00:07:03,104 for, like, a year, but luckily, 173 00:07:03,224 --> 00:07:05,411 my friend special K. works in child services, 174 00:07:05,436 --> 00:07:06,628 so she hooked me up. 175 00:07:06,748 --> 00:07:09,531 You know, I don't tell her enough, but she's a great gal. 176 00:07:09,809 --> 00:07:11,965 Molly, let's send her a cookie bouquet. 177 00:07:12,085 --> 00:07:13,861 How about a smoked sable platter? 178 00:07:13,910 --> 00:07:16,184 Outside the box. I like it. Let's do it. 179 00:07:16,304 --> 00:07:16,628 Okay. 180 00:07:16,687 --> 00:07:19,158 Chloe, this is insane. 181 00:07:19,227 --> 00:07:21,834 This is beyond irresponsible. 182 00:07:22,088 --> 00:07:23,238 You can't keep her. 183 00:07:23,289 --> 00:07:25,408 You want to throw molly back out on the streets, 184 00:07:25,670 --> 00:07:26,969 back to her junkie mother, 185 00:07:27,248 --> 00:07:29,495 instead of taking her in and loving her 186 00:07:29,615 --> 00:07:32,400 until she goes on to play college football for ole miss? 187 00:07:33,263 --> 00:07:35,036 That is the premise of "The blind side." 188 00:07:35,212 --> 00:07:36,391 This is my responsibility. 189 00:07:36,421 --> 00:07:37,739 You won't even notice that she's here... 190 00:07:38,173 --> 00:07:39,764 (lowered voice) Although she does play the french horn. 191 00:07:39,884 --> 00:07:41,704 (chuckles) Okay. You know what? 192 00:07:41,728 --> 00:07:44,916 It's fine. I don't care. You do what you want to do. 193 00:07:44,956 --> 00:07:46,472 I have my own stuff to deal with, so... 194 00:07:46,514 --> 00:07:49,903 I've got it under control. Now if you'll excuse me, 195 00:07:50,023 --> 00:07:52,317 I have a very busy 72 hours coming up. 196 00:07:52,376 --> 00:07:52,983 Okay. 197 00:07:53,103 --> 00:07:54,659 Molly. Kimono. 198 00:07:55,941 --> 00:07:56,699 Burka. 199 00:07:58,132 --> 00:07:59,201 Sombrero. 200 00:08:04,770 --> 00:08:07,557 Hello, Joyce. I picked up your dry cleaning, 201 00:08:07,596 --> 00:08:10,330 I got your coffee, and I marked our quarterly report, 202 00:08:10,346 --> 00:08:12,247 and it's ready for review and signature. 203 00:08:12,367 --> 00:08:13,236 Walk with me. 204 00:08:14,822 --> 00:08:16,110 Uh, yes. 205 00:08:17,193 --> 00:08:19,186 (whirring) 206 00:08:19,480 --> 00:08:21,096 I'm impressed with you, June. (keypad beeps) 207 00:08:21,122 --> 00:08:22,816 I'm usually the last one to leave the office, 208 00:08:22,839 --> 00:08:25,138 but I was in here late last night and saw you working. 209 00:08:25,383 --> 00:08:26,671 Didn't you hear me as I passed? 210 00:08:26,878 --> 00:08:28,628 I was wearing my sweater with the little bells on it. 211 00:08:28,748 --> 00:08:29,521 No, I didn't. 212 00:08:29,588 --> 00:08:31,216 I thought so. You didn't say bye. 213 00:08:31,874 --> 00:08:34,827 My point is, I'm impressed with the dedication you're showing. 214 00:08:34,947 --> 00:08:36,747 I want you to help out with the toy-con account. 215 00:08:36,867 --> 00:08:37,849 It's a lot to slog through. 216 00:08:37,969 --> 00:08:40,000 Think you can handle it? Absolutely. (chuckles) 217 00:08:40,120 --> 00:08:42,047 I am a great multitasker. 218 00:08:42,278 --> 00:08:44,307 (chuckles) Juggling is not just a fun pastime 219 00:08:44,344 --> 00:08:46,771 That destroyed my wrists. It is a way of life. 220 00:08:47,038 --> 00:08:49,108 Great. Oh, and by the way, 221 00:08:49,582 --> 00:08:51,790 lot of compliments. - Oh. (chuckles) 222 00:08:53,926 --> 00:08:56,284 (beeping) 223 00:08:56,859 --> 00:09:00,171 "...Giving a new meaning to the term 'daddy's girl.' 224 00:09:01,135 --> 00:09:04,532 Fade out." (exhales deeply) "The end." 225 00:09:06,597 --> 00:09:09,054 Wow. It's the one version of body swap movie 226 00:09:09,174 --> 00:09:10,797 that's never been attempted before... 227 00:09:11,652 --> 00:09:14,298 Father and daughter. (sighs) 228 00:09:15,402 --> 00:09:16,885 But can I pull it off? 229 00:09:17,182 --> 00:09:19,282 I mean, I've never been a 12-year-old girl before. 230 00:09:19,877 --> 00:09:21,759 I've had tons of 12-year-old girl fans, 231 00:09:21,770 --> 00:09:24,720 countless stalkers, thousands of dreams where I was one, 232 00:09:24,969 --> 00:09:26,285 But I don't know if I could become one. 233 00:09:26,405 --> 00:09:28,444 You just need to prepare. 234 00:09:28,564 --> 00:09:32,529 Like with any role, you have to be around a preteen girl, 235 00:09:32,649 --> 00:09:34,083 Get inside her head, 236 00:09:34,203 --> 00:09:36,587 And who better to teach you 237 00:09:37,081 --> 00:09:39,690 than La Shipka herself? 238 00:09:40,601 --> 00:09:42,995 Luther, clear my schedule. 239 00:09:43,115 --> 00:09:44,969 We need to make cinematic history! 240 00:09:45,040 --> 00:09:48,880 Sir, it has been clear for weeks. 241 00:09:50,382 --> 00:09:52,197 (horns honk) 242 00:09:52,897 --> 00:09:54,071 (sighs) ohh. 243 00:09:54,191 --> 00:09:54,924 (door closes) 244 00:09:54,973 --> 00:09:56,139 What's going on? Where's Chloe? 245 00:09:56,327 --> 00:09:57,874 May I tell her who's asking? 246 00:09:58,409 --> 00:10:00,164 - It's June. - June... 247 00:10:00,718 --> 00:10:02,549 - Got it. - Uh, she's in Seattle. 248 00:10:02,572 --> 00:10:04,870 The argentinean diplomat is a fan of "Grey's Anatomy." 249 00:10:04,990 --> 00:10:07,098 Wait. What? She just left you here like that? 250 00:10:08,886 --> 00:10:09,707 Unbelievable. 251 00:10:09,872 --> 00:10:10,751 Oh. I'll get her for you. 252 00:10:11,048 --> 00:10:13,181 (beeps) Hi. I've... I've got June. 253 00:10:13,529 --> 00:10:14,341 (lowered voice) I'm putting her through. 254 00:10:14,384 --> 00:10:16,435 (cell phone rings) 255 00:10:16,644 --> 00:10:17,222 (beeps) 256 00:10:18,968 --> 00:10:19,547 Chloe. 257 00:10:19,667 --> 00:10:22,636 Hi. Who knew Seattle was so rainy? Brr. 258 00:10:22,686 --> 00:10:23,918 What the hell are you doing?! 259 00:10:23,973 --> 00:10:25,959 Um, working. My busy season? 260 00:10:26,007 --> 00:10:27,549 You can't just take off to Seattle. 261 00:10:27,579 --> 00:10:29,779 You have a child. You have responsibilities. 262 00:10:29,810 --> 00:10:31,905 Um, that's why I have a child, 263 00:10:31,949 --> 00:10:33,910 Because I have responsibilities. 264 00:10:33,947 --> 00:10:35,719 - Molly, are you there? - I'm here, Chloe. 265 00:10:35,780 --> 00:10:37,589 Can you extend my trip for a day? 266 00:10:37,632 --> 00:10:39,308 I just need some time to myself. 267 00:10:39,363 --> 00:10:41,314 Okay, do you want to be On the same flight back, 268 00:10:41,369 --> 00:10:42,759 just one day later, or... 269 00:10:42,773 --> 00:10:44,617 Figure it out, Molly. Bye. (beeps) 270 00:10:44,638 --> 00:10:45,118 (sighs) ohh. (beeps) 271 00:10:45,133 --> 00:10:47,326 This is the last thing that I need to deal with. 272 00:10:47,658 --> 00:10:49,093 I have to go through the toy-con account, 273 00:10:49,112 --> 00:10:50,941 and mark wants me to look over security camera footage 274 00:10:50,991 --> 00:10:52,024 of Pepper weighing the beans. 275 00:10:52,096 --> 00:10:52,889 Have you eaten yet? 276 00:10:54,083 --> 00:10:55,579 Great. I'll just do it. 277 00:10:56,243 --> 00:10:57,341 Mm. This is so like Chloe, 278 00:10:57,410 --> 00:10:59,971 leaving you here eating chocolate for dinner. 279 00:11:00,338 --> 00:11:03,546 Sorry. I shouldn't disparage your guardian in front of you. 280 00:11:03,804 --> 00:11:06,665 Relax. I left my last home when "20/20" broke down the door 281 00:11:06,714 --> 00:11:07,584 To do an expose. 282 00:11:07,704 --> 00:11:09,159 This is like a slumber party. 283 00:11:10,189 --> 00:11:12,466 I am so sorry. I think I saw that episode. 284 00:11:17,632 --> 00:11:19,008 (door opens) 285 00:11:19,803 --> 00:11:23,065 Ah. (sighs) I'm home. 286 00:11:23,741 --> 00:11:27,026 Oh, Molly, did you intend to book me 287 00:11:27,046 --> 00:11:29,033 at a hotel with the scratchiest towels 288 00:11:29,053 --> 00:11:31,030 in Seattle, or was that a coincidence? 289 00:11:31,079 --> 00:11:32,207 I-I'm sorry. (chuckles) 290 00:11:33,169 --> 00:11:35,109 Hey, you're home! 291 00:11:35,337 --> 00:11:37,058 (lowered voice) This is exactly what I didn't want to happen! 292 00:11:37,097 --> 00:11:39,361 What, you not knowing how to apply eyeliner? 293 00:11:40,415 --> 00:11:42,489 No. You abandoning Molly. 294 00:11:42,609 --> 00:11:44,698 This is just like your goldfish or your plant. 295 00:11:44,818 --> 00:11:48,390 As if I didn't have enough to do, you leave me with your kid. 296 00:11:48,424 --> 00:11:49,854 Wow, June. Unbelievable. 297 00:11:49,917 --> 00:11:51,719 I love how, when you're upset, she's my kid. 298 00:11:51,787 --> 00:11:53,295 She's your kid, too, you know? 299 00:11:53,415 --> 00:11:53,810 What? 300 00:11:53,930 --> 00:11:56,336 Oh. I said we were lesbian co-parents. 301 00:11:56,906 --> 00:11:59,210 Come on, June, you moved in the first day we met. 302 00:11:59,330 --> 00:12:01,012 I bagged me quite the trophy. 303 00:12:01,132 --> 00:12:02,436 Oh! 304 00:12:04,215 --> 00:12:05,531 (door closes) 305 00:12:05,545 --> 00:12:08,630 Of course I had to say we were lesbian lover co-parents. 306 00:12:08,673 --> 00:12:10,896 They never would have given a kid to a single mom 307 00:12:10,939 --> 00:12:12,397 who doesn't have an "official job." 308 00:12:12,419 --> 00:12:14,637 How did you make me a co-parent with me knowing?! 309 00:12:14,757 --> 00:12:16,461 Don't you remember When that social worker 310 00:12:16,504 --> 00:12:18,672 came by the house to see if we were fit parents? 311 00:12:19,203 --> 00:12:20,573 You mean that woman that came to interview us 312 00:12:20,611 --> 00:12:21,803 for that apartment blog? 313 00:12:21,852 --> 00:12:25,241 And over here is our bookshelf made of reclaimed wood... 314 00:12:25,268 --> 00:12:25,701 Ah. 315 00:12:25,739 --> 00:12:28,181 And this over here is our reading nook. 316 00:12:28,241 --> 00:12:28,723 (chuckles) 317 00:12:28,766 --> 00:12:30,690 We're in between cats at the moment. 318 00:12:30,712 --> 00:12:33,304 That's why there's no fur. Mm. 319 00:12:35,378 --> 00:12:37,524 So that paper that I signed was not a photo release? 320 00:12:37,573 --> 00:12:39,942 That was you getting a foster kid. 321 00:12:40,120 --> 00:12:42,563 That was the moment you got a kid. 322 00:12:43,522 --> 00:12:46,001 - Anyway, it's a moot point. - What do you mean? 323 00:12:46,034 --> 00:12:47,535 Well, now that my busy season's over, 324 00:12:47,573 --> 00:12:48,750 I don't need the extra help. 325 00:12:48,870 --> 00:12:50,127 Plus, she wasn't a great assistant. 326 00:12:50,182 --> 00:12:52,067 I mean, every day between 9:00 and 3:00, 327 00:12:52,119 --> 00:12:53,436 I could not get ahold of her. 328 00:12:53,474 --> 00:12:57,533 Ohh. She was at school. You cannot fire your daughter. 329 00:12:57,604 --> 00:12:59,862 Lord knows this is not the best time for me 330 00:12:59,982 --> 00:13:01,336 With my job and my internship, 331 00:13:01,379 --> 00:13:04,054 But we have a responsibility to Molly... 332 00:13:04,174 --> 00:13:06,076 Hi. We were just talking. 333 00:13:06,120 --> 00:13:07,003 We're not fighting. 334 00:13:07,079 --> 00:13:08,942 Is... is everything okay? Do you need anything? 335 00:13:09,007 --> 00:13:10,736 I-I need someone to make me a costume. 336 00:13:10,790 --> 00:13:12,812 I'm playing the dragon in "Flower drum song." 337 00:13:12,850 --> 00:13:14,579 (inhales deeply) oh, I would love to, 338 00:13:14,606 --> 00:13:16,591 but I'm actually making a dragon costume 339 00:13:16,613 --> 00:13:19,011 For somebody else. They just asked, so... 340 00:13:19,038 --> 00:13:20,111 (sighs) (chuckles) 341 00:13:26,070 --> 00:13:27,122 (horns honk in distance) 342 00:13:27,242 --> 00:13:28,075 (whispers) what time is it? 343 00:13:28,742 --> 00:13:29,515 Oh. 344 00:13:32,860 --> 00:13:34,437 (lowered voice) uh, joyce. (chuckles) 345 00:13:34,734 --> 00:13:36,496 - What? - Um... (chuckles) 346 00:13:36,537 --> 00:13:39,518 - I-I was wondering if, uh... - I can't hear you. 347 00:13:39,558 --> 00:13:42,077 Um, uh, I-I hate to... I hate to do this, 348 00:13:42,118 --> 00:13:43,947 but I-I actually... - Can you hear her? 349 00:13:43,981 --> 00:13:44,463 No, joyce. 350 00:13:44,491 --> 00:13:45,859 You see? She can't hear you either. 351 00:13:45,920 --> 00:13:48,318 Neither michelle nor I can hear you. 352 00:13:48,352 --> 00:13:49,460 (normal voice) I hate to do this, 353 00:13:49,487 --> 00:13:51,527 But I have something I need to go do at 4:00. 354 00:13:51,679 --> 00:13:52,859 My daughter's in a play. 355 00:13:52,915 --> 00:13:55,327 Daughter? You never mentioned you had a kid. 356 00:13:55,349 --> 00:13:57,703 Okay. Uh, well, my roommate unwittingly signed me up 357 00:13:57,731 --> 00:13:59,036 for a foster child, and she has a play, 358 00:13:59,060 --> 00:14:00,511 and I don't want her to look out and see an empty chair. 359 00:14:01,080 --> 00:14:04,568 Your roommate unwittingly signed you up for a foster child, 360 00:14:04,594 --> 00:14:06,356 And she has a play, and you don't want her 361 00:14:06,391 --> 00:14:08,314 To just look out there and see an empty chair? 362 00:14:09,568 --> 00:14:12,914 June, June, June, June, June, 363 00:14:12,937 --> 00:14:15,733 June, June, June, June. 364 00:14:17,135 --> 00:14:18,231 June. 365 00:14:20,475 --> 00:14:21,458 (doorbell rings) 366 00:14:24,815 --> 00:14:26,694 Kiernan, hey. Come on in. 367 00:14:26,732 --> 00:14:28,118 Thank you so much for coming. 368 00:14:28,346 --> 00:14:29,466 Can I get you something to drink? 369 00:14:29,491 --> 00:14:30,793 I don't really have any kid drinks, 370 00:14:30,832 --> 00:14:32,828 But, uh, I-I could just give you some coffee. 371 00:14:32,857 --> 00:14:33,893 You could sip it through a straw. 372 00:14:33,927 --> 00:14:34,607 Sure. Thanks. 373 00:14:34,621 --> 00:14:36,692 I heard, uh, Jon Hamm's really good at basketball. 374 00:14:36,740 --> 00:14:38,817 Is that true? Is January Jones a robot? 375 00:14:38,937 --> 00:14:39,941 Can I have your boots? 376 00:14:40,125 --> 00:14:42,352 Chloe, Kiernan is here so that we can work. 377 00:14:42,379 --> 00:14:45,386 Fine. Guess I'll just read a script or something. 378 00:14:46,414 --> 00:14:47,386 "Check, please!" 379 00:14:47,667 --> 00:14:48,531 That sounds fun. 380 00:14:52,010 --> 00:14:53,385 All right. Have a seat. 381 00:14:53,605 --> 00:14:57,593 So my agent called and said you wanted to hang out and study me? 382 00:14:57,805 --> 00:14:59,446 Yeah. Yeah, since we're, uh, you know, 383 00:14:59,476 --> 00:15:00,569 We're swapping bodies in the movie, 384 00:15:00,615 --> 00:15:02,468 I just figured, uh, I should, you know, 385 00:15:02,588 --> 00:15:05,210 kinda get inside your head and, you know, 386 00:15:05,330 --> 00:15:07,632 See where you're coming from, get my tween on. 387 00:15:07,752 --> 00:15:09,189 - Don't say that. - No? 388 00:15:09,309 --> 00:15:11,278 Well, I-I heard it a lot at the Kids' Choice Awards. 389 00:15:11,398 --> 00:15:12,394 I got slimed in '04. 390 00:15:12,514 --> 00:15:13,837 (chuckles) That's so long ago. 391 00:15:13,890 --> 00:15:15,599 Guys, listen to this. 392 00:15:15,849 --> 00:15:18,424 Alex and jane are really nervous because the food critic 393 00:15:18,462 --> 00:15:20,497 is coming to their restaurant on opening night. 394 00:15:20,617 --> 00:15:24,171 Then Javier accidentally deep-fries a pair of glasses, 395 00:15:24,217 --> 00:15:27,429 And they say, "Javier, you need to be more responsible." 396 00:15:27,612 --> 00:15:30,531 That's exactly what June said to me! 397 00:15:30,651 --> 00:15:33,926 I'm Javier, and Molly is the glasses! 398 00:15:36,126 --> 00:15:38,139 Don't mind Chloe. She's totes cray-cray. 399 00:15:38,259 --> 00:15:39,544 Don't say that either. 400 00:15:40,068 --> 00:15:42,580 When June said it, I thought it was the dumbest thing I'd ever heard, 401 00:15:42,618 --> 00:15:45,398 but somehow, reading it In this television script 402 00:15:45,459 --> 00:15:49,049 by... These three jews, It suddenly hit home. 403 00:15:49,233 --> 00:15:51,477 Sometimes, things don't click 404 00:15:51,530 --> 00:15:53,854 Until Hollywood really spells them out for you. 405 00:15:55,235 --> 00:15:56,650 - Ahem. - Ahem. 406 00:15:56,723 --> 00:15:58,264 - Stop it. - Stop it. 407 00:15:58,429 --> 00:16:00,336 - No, seriously. - No, seriously. 408 00:16:00,456 --> 00:16:01,114 (sighs) (sighs) 409 00:16:03,135 --> 00:16:07,029 (indistinct conversations, espresso machine gurgles) 410 00:16:07,623 --> 00:16:10,682 Okay. Vanilla latte. That'll be $3.50. 411 00:16:11,312 --> 00:16:13,933 Miss, please don't pour your coffee into the trash hole. 412 00:16:13,952 --> 00:16:16,774 I asked "room for cream?" for this very reason. 413 00:16:16,894 --> 00:16:18,931 Pepper, can I have a little help up here? I'm swamped. 414 00:16:18,963 --> 00:16:20,129 No! (chuckles) 415 00:16:20,196 --> 00:16:22,669 Pepper is not handling cash or coffee anymore, June. 416 00:16:22,711 --> 00:16:23,758 You know that. 417 00:16:23,788 --> 00:16:26,270 So is your daughter gonna be here all day? 418 00:16:26,294 --> 00:16:27,821 Because there's kind of a policy... (sighs) 419 00:16:27,857 --> 00:16:29,504 against employees bringing kids to work. 420 00:16:29,528 --> 00:16:32,337 (sighs) I'm so sorry. I just... I couldn't find a sitter. 421 00:16:32,403 --> 00:16:34,796 Hey, Robin. Can you please babysit for me? 422 00:16:34,826 --> 00:16:35,469 No. Busy. 423 00:16:36,449 --> 00:16:38,775 Don't worry. She won't get in the way. (mouths words) 424 00:16:39,405 --> 00:16:41,394 Can you take off parental controls? 425 00:16:41,442 --> 00:16:43,048 - No. - Can I buy "tiny wings"? 426 00:16:43,090 --> 00:16:44,613 No. (bells jingling) 427 00:16:44,733 --> 00:16:47,027 - June. - Oh! Look who's here. 428 00:16:47,063 --> 00:16:47,556 (door closes) 429 00:16:47,730 --> 00:16:49,432 First you flaked on molly's play, 430 00:16:49,486 --> 00:16:51,726 and then I ask you to take her to jazz class, 431 00:16:51,779 --> 00:16:53,256 and you said you would, and you did not. 432 00:16:53,376 --> 00:16:55,224 Look, I thought about what you said, 433 00:16:55,268 --> 00:16:57,504 and I don't just exist in a vacuum, 434 00:16:57,533 --> 00:17:00,036 And I really need to take responsibility for my own actions. 435 00:17:01,069 --> 00:17:03,389 Well, I... th... I mean, that... that's great. 436 00:17:03,643 --> 00:17:05,305 I'm... I'm really glad that you feel that way. 437 00:17:05,944 --> 00:17:07,597 Okay, so molly needs new kneepads 438 00:17:07,717 --> 00:17:09,393 for her floor routine, so I'm gonna need, 439 00:17:09,439 --> 00:17:11,159 Um, I'm gonna need a check for half of that. 440 00:17:11,175 --> 00:17:12,582 No. I can't do it. I don't want to. 441 00:17:12,702 --> 00:17:15,636 You! You! You have not changed at all. 442 00:17:15,756 --> 00:17:18,299 It's one thing to realize that you're a parent philosophically, 443 00:17:18,341 --> 00:17:20,301 But it's another thing to be a parent. 444 00:17:20,367 --> 00:17:22,850 You need to commit to this. You are either in 445 00:17:22,910 --> 00:17:24,155 or you are out, Chloe. 446 00:17:24,275 --> 00:17:27,348 Oh. Then I am out. I didn't realize I had a choice. Thanks. 447 00:17:27,378 --> 00:17:28,364 (cell phone rings) you... 448 00:17:28,430 --> 00:17:29,898 (bells jingling, beeps) 449 00:17:30,217 --> 00:17:32,778 Hello? Hi. Hi, Joyce. Hi. 450 00:17:32,804 --> 00:17:34,969 I'm so sorry I forgot to e-mail you those toy-con documents. 451 00:17:34,984 --> 00:17:35,899 I'm still at work... 452 00:17:36,438 --> 00:17:38,926 What? No. No! 453 00:17:39,159 --> 00:17:41,428 Look, okay, look, I know I have a kid, 454 00:17:41,481 --> 00:17:43,758 But I can do this job just as... just as well 455 00:17:43,795 --> 00:17:45,125 As any other employee. 456 00:17:46,268 --> 00:17:48,066 No, I-I didn't know that michelle had 457 00:17:48,096 --> 00:17:49,914 an inhospitable womb, but you know what? 458 00:17:49,954 --> 00:17:52,168 I-I don't think it's fair that you reward her for that. 459 00:17:52,384 --> 00:17:55,945 Ma'am! Ma'am, please don't pour that coffee down the hole. 460 00:17:55,979 --> 00:17:57,662 Where do you think the liquid goes? 461 00:17:57,720 --> 00:17:59,765 Joyce? J... (whispers) crap! 462 00:17:59,803 --> 00:18:00,092 (beeps) 463 00:18:00,164 --> 00:18:01,327 Is chloe mad at me? 464 00:18:01,356 --> 00:18:03,284 Because I asked her if she wanted to roll calls, 465 00:18:03,308 --> 00:18:05,463 and she said I'm not her assistant anymore. 466 00:18:05,656 --> 00:18:07,065 Honey, no. 467 00:18:07,387 --> 00:18:09,299 You're not her assistant anymore. 468 00:18:09,328 --> 00:18:12,042 You're our... well... (chuckles) you're my child, 469 00:18:12,071 --> 00:18:14,732 And you know what? You and I are gonna be just fine. 470 00:18:15,622 --> 00:18:16,249 (sighs) That's too bad, 471 00:18:16,268 --> 00:18:18,480 Because working for chloe was fun, and you're kinda lame. 472 00:18:18,524 --> 00:18:20,012 You have a lot of rules. 473 00:18:21,167 --> 00:18:23,201 Lame? You think I'm lame? 474 00:18:23,764 --> 00:18:25,931 After everything I've done for you? (chuckles) 475 00:18:26,109 --> 00:18:28,143 I mean, I spent 19 hours... (chuckles) 476 00:18:28,167 --> 00:18:30,178 Sewing you a dragon costume, and, you know, 477 00:18:30,197 --> 00:18:32,420 I just got fired, from my internship, 478 00:18:32,483 --> 00:18:33,701 to go to your play. 479 00:18:33,898 --> 00:18:37,404 (raised voice) I work two jobs to give you a life, 480 00:18:37,452 --> 00:18:40,597 And no one cares... Not you, not Chloe, 481 00:18:40,650 --> 00:18:43,016 not Joyce, not Lucky, Lucky, 482 00:18:43,136 --> 00:18:44,401 sterile Michelle! 483 00:18:44,752 --> 00:18:47,448 Would it kill anyone to say thank you, 484 00:18:47,616 --> 00:18:49,387 To look over at me and say, 485 00:18:49,430 --> 00:18:53,769 "June, hey, we see you, we see you, and thank you"?! 486 00:18:54,736 --> 00:18:56,854 Your breath smells when you yell. 487 00:18:57,230 --> 00:18:59,240 Your breath smells when you yell! 488 00:18:59,264 --> 00:19:01,584 (screaming) Your breath smells when you yell! 489 00:19:01,612 --> 00:19:05,133 Your breath smells when you yell! 490 00:19:05,157 --> 00:19:07,080 Oh, my god. She's shaking her baby. 491 00:19:07,143 --> 00:19:09,134 You sucked in "Flower drum song"! 492 00:19:09,196 --> 00:19:13,815 You're killing your mother! Why?! 493 00:19:19,515 --> 00:19:22,029 (gasps, panting) 494 00:19:22,149 --> 00:19:25,732 - Oh, what happened? - Shh. Shh. 495 00:19:25,852 --> 00:19:26,943 You blacked out. 496 00:19:27,255 --> 00:19:29,658 You're overworked. You took on too much. 497 00:19:30,135 --> 00:19:33,309 Did I shake our baby? Yeah. Yeah, you did. 498 00:19:33,429 --> 00:19:36,394 - Oh, my God. Is she okay? - Don't worry. 499 00:19:36,432 --> 00:19:38,864 I took care of it. I used the it's just beans 500 00:19:38,892 --> 00:19:40,630 security footage of you shaking Molly 501 00:19:40,658 --> 00:19:42,912 to prove to child services that you're an unfit mother. 502 00:19:43,138 --> 00:19:45,069 You'll never be able to lead a girl scout troop 503 00:19:45,099 --> 00:19:46,806 or sponsor a hungry child. 504 00:19:46,844 --> 00:19:49,499 Oh, God. My baby. 505 00:19:49,553 --> 00:19:50,478 Don't worry. 506 00:19:50,598 --> 00:19:53,095 She's going on to a good, stable home. 507 00:19:53,283 --> 00:19:54,893 I used my connections and hooked her up 508 00:19:54,930 --> 00:19:56,785 with the ambassador to Morocco and his wife. 509 00:19:56,829 --> 00:19:58,498 They've been trying to adopt for years. 510 00:19:58,861 --> 00:20:00,899 Everyone who's ever worked on my desk goes on 511 00:20:00,943 --> 00:20:02,222 to bigger and better things. 512 00:20:02,809 --> 00:20:06,202 Wow. For once, you cleaned up your own mess. 513 00:20:06,233 --> 00:20:08,975 Yeah, well, after I saw you freaking out at the coffee shop, 514 00:20:08,999 --> 00:20:11,020 I realized it was because of something I had done, 515 00:20:11,039 --> 00:20:14,243 and I do need to take responsibility for my own actions. 516 00:20:14,411 --> 00:20:17,410 I guess you needed more responsibility, and I needed less. 517 00:20:18,439 --> 00:20:21,168 I thought I could handle it, but I guess I can't. 518 00:20:21,662 --> 00:20:22,230 (chuckles) 519 00:20:22,350 --> 00:20:24,347 Remember when I thought I could take care of a plant? 520 00:20:24,420 --> 00:20:26,687 Ha! (laughing) I couldn't even take care of a kid. 521 00:20:26,721 --> 00:20:29,031 What am I gonna do with a plant? (laughs) 522 00:20:31,683 --> 00:20:33,031 Ah. Molly. 523 00:20:33,401 --> 00:20:36,486 - She really is gone. - It's so quiet. 524 00:20:38,124 --> 00:20:40,925 Hmm. (sniffs) 525 00:20:42,464 --> 00:20:43,609 (door closes) 526 00:20:51,602 --> 00:20:53,039 You embarrassed me in front of Jenkins 527 00:20:53,075 --> 00:20:54,706 At the business meeting today. 528 00:20:54,876 --> 00:20:55,971 Oh, you're embarrassed? 529 00:20:56,146 --> 00:20:58,414 You got my period during cheerleader tryouts. 530 00:20:58,450 --> 00:21:00,273 I can never show my face at school again! 531 00:21:00,327 --> 00:21:02,271 Do you think this is easy for me? 532 00:21:02,307 --> 00:21:04,443 Do you think I like having to sit while I pee?! 533 00:21:04,497 --> 00:21:07,025 Do you think I like having to make out with mommy?! 534 00:21:08,331 --> 00:21:10,521 (sighs) Oh, my God. 535 00:21:10,641 --> 00:21:13,324 Cut! This is a disaster! (buzzer) 536 00:21:13,378 --> 00:21:14,220 (crew speaking indistinctly) what? 537 00:21:14,244 --> 00:21:15,947 Well, I-I thought that was working pretty well. 538 00:21:15,983 --> 00:21:17,126 How... how'd that feel for you? 539 00:21:17,168 --> 00:21:18,582 Ohh. This is a train wreck. 540 00:21:20,652 --> 00:21:22,404 I-I thought that was some of my best work ever. 541 00:21:22,434 --> 00:21:22,981 I mean... 542 00:21:23,866 --> 00:21:25,774 Hey, whoa, whoa. I'm still working on that, a-actually. 543 00:21:25,799 --> 00:21:31,799 Sync & corrections by into-the-light. www.addic7ed.com