Previously on Necessary Roughness...
Man: Maurice Manningfield. T.K.: He is gunning for my ass.
Boom! The minefields of life never go away.
Commentator: Terrence King decks the Minefield!
Donnally: Damon Razor. I think the kid's got enough talent
to develop into a number-one.
My name is Bryce Abbott. I stole someone's identity.
I just don't know what to do now.
Dani: It's been said that big dreams
are the magic that stirs us to greatness.
But what drives people to attempt the impossible?
To push themselves to break world records?
Is it simply the challenge?
Or the hope that our deeds might outlive our last breath?
[ Techno music plays ]
[ Exhales sharply ]
[ Breathing heavily ]
[ British accent ] Get me out!
[ Gasping ]
[ Gasps ]
[ Sighs ] Dani: Breathe. Just breathe.
[ Breathes deeply ]
Hey, guys.
Hi. Hey.
Um...listen up.
I have something that I would like to discuss with you.
She did it. Did what?
Whatever it is we're in trouble for.
No, you're not in trouble -- that I know of.
Okay, uh, remember when I promised you guys
that I would tell you when I was seeing someone?
Well...
Really? Who?
Duh, it's Matt. Right?
Wait, hold on a second. Trainer Matt?
Yes. Trainer Matt. [ Chuckles nervously ]
Okay, why are you telling us this now?
Are you getting married? Are you pregnant?
No! No.
Okay, no, it's just serious enough
that I would like us all to have dinner together on Wednesday.
Pommies? You?
I never knew you were interested in dance-line cheering.
Well, maybe if you were spending less time with your secret boyfriend,
it wouldn't be such a shock.
Mom, just...
just use protection.
♪ Yeah ♪
Ho ho.
♪ This is for you, hey ♪
King: With the draft less than a week away,
there are still questions as to which side of the ball
the New York Hawks should focus on,
and it really hinges on the status of Terrence King.
If he can't go, there are five receivers, I think,
grade out as third-round picks.
Mm. Mm.
Kiddies are on your ass, T.K.
You fools sound like coach. I swat rookies like flies.
Yeah, right. Well, you'd better SWAT them fast, "T."
You see what's trending on Twitter?
"Hashtag -- who's the next T.K.?"
Man, the rest of the team is gonna love this, dawg.
What's he yakking about?
It's trending nationwide, baby.
[ Laughs ] Who's the next T.K.?
Ooh. They writing my obit before I o-bite it?!
[ Both laugh ]
Yo, "who's the next T.K.? How about Bozo?
'Cause King is a straight-up clown."
[ Both laugh ]
Yo, check this one out. "I vote Lady Gaga.
At least she's less of an attention whore."
Damn!
And these hits just keep...
Coming and coming. Coming and coming.
And y'all are about to get going and going and going!
I'm finding this 243% less hilarious than the two of y'all!
Where are you getting them numbers from, man?
[ Both laugh ]
Why are you always wearing all red?
You look like a big-ass Slim Jim. [ Both laugh ]
[ Rap music plays ]
[ Birds chirping ]
Please, take a card -- any card.
Is this a trick? I don't do tricks.
My milieu is the impossible, the unbelievable, the unfathomable.
Now, please, all I ask is that you take a card and you sign it.
Right, now, look at the card, and without showing it to me,
you're going to rip it up into pieces
and you're going to feed it to me.
I'm gonna feed it to you?
Yes, please. Come along. Time's of the essence.
Chop-chop.
Ready?
In the hatch. Now. Hmm.
[ Muffled ] Mmm, it's delicious.
[ Chokes ]
Oh!
[ Choking ]
[ Gasps ]
Oh, I say, what's that?
No.
Would that possibly be your card?
How...
How did you do that?
First rule of magic -- never reveal your secrets.
[ Gasps ] Thank you.
Yes. Cards.
It's where I started when I was young.
Gawky, acne. [ Laughs ]
Yeah, but still, if you pull a girl's card out of thin air,
telephone numbers do tend to magically appear, don't they?
But if you want to make a living as an illusionist,
you have to go big.
Like when you were suspended above the Seine
in a lucite pyramid.
Yes.
Or surviving a 20-foot-high tower of flames in Atlantic City
or, in this case, a feat of mental endurance and stamina.
I'll be buried alive for nine days in Central Park.
People are gonna be walking directly over me.
They'll be able to watch me from down below. It'll be great.
And then [chuckles] I'll escape from the coffin.
Poof!
Wow, that is impressive.
It could be.
Last Friday when I was rehearsing, I...
I panicked inside the coffin.
I hyperventilated, and, uh, I couldn't breathe,
and I -- [ clears throat ] I had to get out.
That sounds like claustrophobia.
In 2006, I was encased inside a narrow tube
with no light for three days, and I never flinched.
Now, suddenly, terrified.
Is there anything new going on in your life?
I mean, I've been divorced 10 years. I'm long over that.
And, well, my daughter, she's about to get married --
terrific guy, great.
And I have just secured
the most lucrative television contract of my career.
For this stunt... "Back from the Dead."
...which you will be performing... Two weeks from tomorrow.
Dr. Santino...please,
you've got to help me get back in that coffin.
Finished my breakdown
of the top 10 prospects by position.
You, uh -- you want the hard copy,
or you want me to just e-mail it?
Hard copies. I'm old-fashioned that way.
Oh, you're not old-fashioned, Pat -- just really damn old.
Nah. You're three years older than me, Hank.
So don't you start slinging your crap.
[ Both laugh ]
Matt Donnally, head trainer, meet Hank Griffin, new G.M.
Interim G.M., courtesy of the league.
I'm here to help you stabilize your front office
till your Pittman situation works itself out.
Hank and I came up through the ranks in Denver.
[ Chuckles ]
Back in '92, Pat was the offensive-line coach.
I was in the front office.
Mm-hmm. And here we are, putting the band back together again.
Now, look, my mission is not to destroy.
I'm here to steer the ship back on course, navigate the draft.
Hank's looking to appoint someone
from inside the organization as assistant G.M.,
and I told him Nico would be a good choice.
Nico? Hmm.
[ Clears throat ]
Yes, Donnally, I suggested you.
[ Laughter ]
Assistant G.M. on an interim basis.
Hey, I'd be honored on any basis. Thank you.
Then it's so.
Pat... say hello to your new boss.
♪ Baby, work your magic on me ♪
♪ Necessary Roughness 2x05 ♪ Mr. Irrelevant Original Air Date on July 11, 2012
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
I'm not trending.
Trending in what way?
The whole world is Tweetin', Doc.
And what are they Tweetin' about?
Oh, everything except for me.
You know, uh, pound -- "these aren't my socks."
That's trending.
Half of the cast of "The Hunger Games,"
and the Minefield is trending ahead of me,
and I knocked his sorry ass out of the playoffs.
These damn twaters are acting like I'm dead.
Twaters?
It's when a Tweeter and a hater have a baby.
These babies twate.
Look, Terrence, I understand.
Rehabbing has got to be --
A pain in my ass. That's what it is.
And it makes sense
that you would be looking for distractions.
But we can come up with a strategy
that will help you focus on your goals.
I might be five yards ahead of you, Doc.
I'm getting a Tweet master.
Uh, I'm sorry -- a what?
I'm hiring Diddy's ghost Tweeter to Tweet for me.
This dude makes you much more brilliant and funny
than you ever thought you could be.
Pound -- try to follow the genius.
If somebody else is tweeting for me, then I won't
not pay attention to all the stuff that's not important.
You know what I'm saying? [ Chuckles ]
Winter: 5, 6, down 7, 8.
And 1, plank 2, down 3, out 4.
And 5-v 6, 7, and 8.
Down 1, clutch 2, 3 cross 4.
Clap 5, head 6, 7, 8.
1, 2, knee 3, knee 4,
back 5, hug 6, front 7, 8.
[ Sighs ] You'll get the hang, Lindz.
You look awesome, Zoe.
Okay, girls, welcome to the first day of Pommie tryouts
for the 2012-13 squad.
Everyone, grab a number, and let's get busy.
Quickly. Let's go.
Oh, assistant-general manager with a hot new haircut!
Oh, congratulations!
Thank you.
Mm-mmm!
[ Both chuckle ] Ray Jr.: Hello? Mom?
Oh, where?
No, no. Don't worry -- I told them this morning.
You sure? Door slamming usually means I'm ducking for a closet.
No, no, this is just a relaxed way
to introduce you into their world, so be cool, okay?
Hey! Guys, you remember Matt.
Yes, mom, we do. Yeah.
Hey.
[ Chuckles ]
Oh, uh, how were your Pommie tryouts?
Fine.
I have homework. Yeah, me too.
Got to study.
Awesome!
Come on. They're just teenagers. They like you.
No, no, no. They liked me when I wasn't dating their mother.
No.
Yo, what's up?!
Mm!
Sweet pad, yo. Nice.
You are the Tweet master?
Sure thing, broham.
You talked to the Diddy dog, right?
He told you what I do --
reboot your image, give you the cyber cred.
You got a brew?
[ Scoffs ]
[ Chuckles ]
You are here to give me cred?
You're asking 'cause I'm white?
[ Bottles clink ]
If you were any whiter, you'd be teeth, homeboy.
[ Laughs ]
Look, I honed my chops at the Columbia School of Journalism,
was a political speech writer, did The Onion.
I know funny, and I know how to grab headlines.
Good. I need some grabbing. The whole world thinks I'm dead.
Oh, bro, I'm gonna blow it up for you,
get you trending worldwide -- galaxy-wide!
And I'm gonna do it without anyone knowing I'm even there.
I'm gonna become you -- your voice, your DNA.
Stealth. Like a ninja.
Like a Tweet-ja.
[ Cap twists ] Now...
What's your password?
This is where the magic happens --
from the traditional...
[ Electricity buzzes ]
Oh!
[ Laughs ]
...to the bizarre.
I squeezed myself inside here with 50 venomous asps.
I spent two hours inside, and then -- poof! -- I was gone.
Dr. Santino, Pete Crowe --
designer, master builder, resident genius.
He has been with me...
Forever. ...forever.
Pleasure. Hello.
Pete is engineer extraordinaire.
He's built every illusion --
every illusion, including "Back from the Dead."
Ah.
This is the box that you are going to be buried in.
[ Sighs ]
Hypnosis.
Gonna make me cluck like a chicken?
No, we are gonna try and figure out
what's triggering your claustrophobia.
[ Sighs ]
Okay, Doc. Work your magic on me.
Okay.
You're going to listen to the sound of my voice...
[ Sighs ] ...as I count forward.
[ Indistinct conversations ]
Welcome to the war room, gentlemen.
You all know our new assistant G.M., Matt Donnally.
Terry.
Good to see you. Good to see you.
Let's see what the brain trust has come up with.
Okay, pat, tell us what you're thinking for our first pick.
Mm, my biggest need is in the secondary.
Pittman gutted me with those cuts he made.
I'd like to get immediate help at corner,
so I'm targeting Johnson.
Out of O.S.U.?
Mm. Kid's been money all season and stepped up at the combine.
What says scouting?
Guy's great on everyone's radar.
It's gonna be a tough get.
That's okay.
Johnson's not there, we'll go to the next corner -- Billings.
All in agreement?
We focus on a corner in the third round.
Donnally?
You on board?
Sounds like a plan.
All right.
Fourth round -- we got two picks there.
Defensive tackle from UCLA's a monster.
He's our top choice for that first pick.
[ Knock on door ]
You were quieter than a mime in there.
Didn't want to overstep.
I prefer my assistant G.M. overstepping
to trying to guess what's going on in his damn head.
Look, I know we need a corner.
But I think there's gonna be
better players available in the third --
impact players.
You disagree with Pat.
No disrespect to coach,
but he believes in drafting to fill position.
I believe in drafting best player available.
I'm thinking four or five years ahead here.
[ Cellphone beeps ]
[ Sighs ]
All right, send me over your draft board.
I'll take a look at it.
Right away.
Someone find me Nico Careles.
[ Whistle blows ]
Mr. Careles.
Mr. Griffin.
What the hell kind of shoddy operation are you running here?
Is there a problem?
Terrence King's Twitter feed.
He's mocking the team, and I won't have it. Ah.
As far as the league is concerned,
the Pittman era of coddling is over.
While I'm overseeing things, these players will fall in line,
or they'll find themselves out on their preening little asses.
And you'd like me to deliver that message?
Yes.
And this one -- we just unfroze Mr. King's bonus.
Don't make us regret that.
I want this Twitter nonsense stopped.
I look forward to working with you.
[ Car alarm chirps ]
I was in the coffin.
I was doing a run-through with Pete.
Tell me about that.
I was practicing my usual breathing techniques.
Everything was fine u-u-until...
[ Inhales sharply ]
Oh, my chest is so tight.
What's happening, Jack?
Something horrible.
Okay, describe it for me,
and remember, whatever you're seeing, it's just in your mind.
I can't breathe.
[ Distorted ] It feels like I'm gonna die.
[ Distorted ] Okay, Jack, you're okay, and I'm right here with you.
What do you see?
[ Breathing heavily ]
I'm dead.
[ Indistinct shouting ]
Boy, a couple more weeks of this,
T.K.'s gonna be burning up that field, boy!
Give us a minute.
Brother Grimm, what's up?
Apparently, your Twitter following.
[ Laughs ] I know! Ain't it cool?
Yeah.
Who would have known photoshopping yourself
in every other team's uniform could be so hilarious.
[ Laughs ] Ah, come on, sneako. Where's your damn funny bone?
Well, I'm glad you're entertained
because management is definitely not amused.
Since when have I given a damn about management?
Since there's a new sheriff in town.
With Pittman, I could protect you,
but now the league is involved.
And Hank Griffin? He's not your friend.
[ Whistle blows ]
Dead?
Yes, I saw myself...
at my own funeral. It was frightening.
[ Sighs ]
It's like I was gone
and everyone else's life just went on without me.
Sorry, what does this even matter?
Death and your funeral -- these images are very specific.
I didn't come to you for psychoanalysis.
I have a stunt in 10 days.
I just need help getting over the claustrophobia.
Jack, it's all related.
There's a part of you
that is trying to avoid what's underlying this.
I am not trying to avoid anything.
I'm trying to move forward, okay?
Because if I don't, if I back out, I will be a joke.
I'll be an utterly irrelevant joke!
Yet, subconsciously,
you seem to be resisting going forward.
The question is, "why?"
Whoo-hoo! What up? What's up, baby?
Hey, yo. What's up, my brother? Mm!
Yo, I got you a, uh, double mocha chinois.
I read on TMZ that was your drink.
Thank you. So, you wanted a face-to-face. What's up?
Yeah, man, we have to squash the photo thing.
Squash the photo?! No way!
Come on, that pic was the shizzle, "B"!
I got you popping and locking and trending in Istanbul!
That you did, and Shukran,
but my own personal Darth Vader says
that me in other teams' uniforms, that's a no-go.
[ Sighs ] Whatevs.
All right, okay, so, we'll pull a u-ey
and go a different direction,
ignite some flames, but keep the focus on y-o-u.
Now you're speaking my l-a-n...guage.
That's what I'm talking about.
On a non sequitur, I was watching "Happy Feet."
How about we Tweet I got me a penguin?
People love those damn birds.
[ Groans ] Penguins are small potatoes.
J.M.'s got a bigger trick up his sleeve for you.
Hey. Perfect timing. Dinner is ready.
Where's Ray Jay?
He's at Olivia's, so it's just girls' night.
Hey, what happened with the Pommies tryout?
I made the team.
Hey, congratulations! That's great!
Don't act like you're happy for me.
Of course I'm happy for you,
especially if that's what you want to do.
Admit it -- you think it's stupid.
Honey, where is all this coming from?
It's coming from nothing, all right?
Everything is just great.
I can't eat this because it's all carbs.
[ Whistle blows, indistinct shouting ]
Moneyball!
What up, boy? What's up?
Getting all middle manage-y on me, huh?
Shirking your responsibilities during my rehab.
I'm not shirking. I got promoted.
Good for you.
But you're still gonna make time for me, right?
When I can.
And, hey, you know Stan's one of the best trainers in the league.
Stan?! [ Laughs ]
I didn't see you being so standoffish.
Figured you might stand by me, dude.
Come on, man.
Enjoy your suits and ties, Mr. Donnally.
[ Snaps fingers ]
Really? Really, "T"?
Donnally!
Hey, Coach.
You submitted your own draft board to Hank?
Yeah, he asked for it.
What was I supposed to do?
I put you up for this job.
Least you could have done is come to me first.
[ Sighs ]
Did you take a look at my board? Yeah.
You got a hard-on for Razor, but I don't want Razor
or whatever the guy's name really is.
We already have one head-case wide receiver.
What do we need -- a matched set?!
I want Johnson! Johnson's not gonna be available then.
Bull.
Look, if Razor pans out, along with T.K.,
we have a wide-receiving core
that's gonna take us through the next five years.
Next five years? Yeah.
I got to win tomorrow!
I am sick of being asked to make gourmet meals
off somebody else's groceries.
Pat, I should have come to you first. Yeah.
We just disagree, respectfully.
Oh, we disagree, but it's not respectfully.
Dani: So, the goal for today is to get you back into the coffin,
but this time with the lid closed.
Well, no, it's okay. We don't need to.
I was thinking about our last session.
"Back from the Dead" is the wrong stunt.
I-I-I think my subconscious has been trying to tell me that,
and I only have you to thank for that.
Thank you.
What about it is wrong?
Well, I-it's not big enough, is it?
Basically, it's a retread of "Asps in glass,"
and I think that my subconscious,
it's trying to tell me that I am dying -- creatively.
Pete has already designed
something really rather spectacular.
"Escape over New York."
Is that supposed to be you?
Hanging upside down between two skyscrapers
whilst escaping from that straightjacket.
That's --
It's brilliant, isn't it? It's worthy of Houdini.
And it's all on live television.
Isn't that something that takes months of planning?
Not when Pete's your engineer, no.
[ Cellphone rings ]
Oh. Sorry, it's the, uh -- it's the network.
Excuse me. Uh-huh.
Can I talk to you?
Of course.
Jack doesn't do well with perceived disloyalty.
But I'm worried about this new stunt.
You need to talk him out of it.
Oh, that's not what I do, Pete.
Look [sighs] we've been planning "Back from the Dead"
for 15 months.
All the kinks were worked out,
and now Jack insists on this with less than two weeks' prep.
If I didn't know better, I'd call it a suicide mission.
Dr. Santino, I think he's trying to kill himself.
With the first pick of the draft hours away,
my sources are telling me the New York Hawks
will be using their third-round pick
to fill their need at cornerback.
Unh-unh. Oh, no, he didn't!
What's my boy Josh tweeting now?
It ain't Josh. It's Maurice Manningfield.
The Minefield? He's at Aqua with his homies,
"watching" the draft, and he's trending.
"Hashtag -- Minefield make T.K. go boom."
Yeah, I got it. "Terrence King is straight up done and burnt,
like a steak left on the grill a week too long."
What? Wait, wait, wait.
Here comes your Twitter ghost.
T.K. says, "Does the Minefield want the king of pain
to go boom on his candy ass again?"
I-I tweeted that? You tweeted that!
Yeah, I know -- I just said I tweeted that!
You did it! Yeah!
Flame war! That's how you trend!
Yo, Minefield's talking smack,
but you're smacking right back, baby!
That's what I'm talking about.
I am tweeting my ass off right now.
Yo, the minefield just tweeted back. Check this.
"Terrence King is... suplotoveant --
super slow, old, and totally irrelevant."
Um, I'm s-- my bad, dawg.
I probably shouldn't have read that one right there.
Yeah.
[ Laughs ]
Whoo! Okay.
Yeah.
You know what? Lock up when you leave!
And don't steal nothing with your broke asses!
"T," where are you going, man?
To make the Minefield go "boom!" --
in technicolor.
Thank you. [ Sighs ]
Thank you.
Network loves the new stunt.
[ Laughs ] They've booked me on all the morning shows.
Yeah, I got to ask --
Jack, this last-minute change in the stunt,
it seems like you need more time.
Why the rush?
Well, the rush is that I've got a contract, huh?
Pete, I think we should shorten these wires
a couple of inches, don't you think?
Jack, wait, is it a contract that's worth dying over?
What?
All I'm saying is,
charging headfirst into something this big
w-without all the necessary safety precautions --
Dr. Santino -- date's fixed.
Yeah, well, it couldn't hurt to ask for a slight delay.
Actually, yes, it could, damn it. Jack.
Hmm?
I'm sorry, but I am trying
to do something for the ages here, okay?
And you -- you're obsessing
about all the details, aren't you?
No, I'm wondering why the details
are making you so upset.
I'm not upset. Really.
Look, I hired you to help me, okay?
And you succeeded, so your work is done,
and I'm very grateful.
But now, you'll have to excuse me
because I've got preparations to make.
Thank you.
Jack.
Jack?
Oh!
God, I love the smell of fresh draft picks in the morning.
[ Laughter ]
Oh, Donnally, I spoke to coach about your draft board.
I heard.
Some good ideas in there,
but we're gonna stick with Pat's plan for now -- fill for need.
Hey, I'm a team player. [ Clears throat ]
This is my team. Good. We're all on the same page, then.
[ Telephone rings in distance ]
Can you believe it, Pat? You and I back in the saddle again.
Pretty damn cool.
[ Laughs ]
Turn it up. Here we go.
With the first pick in the 2012 draft,
Miami selects Darius Gaines, Quarterback, U.S.C.
Gentlemen, let's go to war.
Arizona selects Omari Hill, defensive end,
University of North Carolina.
♪ You got my head all twisted ♪
♪ why do I keep coming 'round? ♪
Cleveland has traded the 14th pick to Arizona.
♪ The way you're playing me ♪
♪ I feel like you're keeping me down ♪
♪ 'cause I don't know who you really are ♪
♪ don't know who you are ♪
♪ and I don't know who you think you are ♪
♪ don't know who you are ♪
♪ got to walk away ♪
[ Glass clinking ]
Oh. Ray Jay and I are taking a college tour this summer.
Mm, great. You know where you're headed?
Um... [ Cellphone vibrates ]
Uh, Ray Jay, Lindsay, no texting during dinner.
No, no, that's me. Sorry.
We got the eighth pick tomorrow,
and it is -- it's crazy over there.
Who do you think is gonna be Mr. Irrelevant?
Mr. who?
Last player picked in the draft
usually gets cut before the season starts.
[ Cellphone vibrates ]
Hey, Mom, what time do you think I could meet up with Olivia?
When we're done, Ray Jay.
Yeah, when's that gonna be?
[ Chuckles nervously ]
[ Cellphone vibrates ] Uh...
Mom, Pommies want to get together tonight. Can I go?
Uh... [ Cellphone vibrates ]
What? Oh, gosh, I'm so sorry.
Mom, Pommies -- yes or no?
[ Cellphone vibrates ]
So sorry. Mm-hmm.
[ Cellphones vibrating ]
Okay! Everybody!
Five minutes -- no phones, please.
Sure. Of course. [ Clears throat ]
[ Cellphone vibrating ]
That's your phone, Ma.
Yeah, I think that's... What?
Somewhere here.
[ Vibrating continues ]
[ Vibrating stops ]
We don't answer phones during dinner here.
Yeah, uh, mom, you answer your phone at dinner all the time.
No, I don't.
Okay, this is ridiculous.
You're trying to act like we're the Brady Bunch or something.
What? Lindsay, [Chuckling] No, we're not.
Okay, I'm sorry. I'm not gonna pretend anymore.
This is not our family.
[ Sighs ] Ma, I got it.
[ Cellphone vibrates ]
Phone. No, no. No, no. No, no.
It's -- it's okay.
I got to take it. Yep.
Sorry. It's okay.
Yeah?
Apparently, we answer our phones at dinner.
So...
♪ Close my eyes, close my eyes ♪
[ Indistinct conversations ]
Hey, yo, Minefield!
T-cup, what up, my man?
Don't play dumb with me, Maurice.
I'm just trying to have some dinner with some friends, so...
Oh, you're just having a little dinner with your friends, huh?
That's funny, 'cause on Twitter,
you just say whatever you please!
But in person, you hide behind the Caesar salad.
You gonna let me eat in peace, or do we have a problem?
You know what? We've been down this road.
I ain't gonna throw any punches.
Smart man.
But I will throw some rolls.
I hope you like pumpernickel, bitch.
[ Laughs ]
And I hope you like anchovies, shrimp.
[ Police radio chatter ]
What the hell, T.K.?
I mean, charging down here?
I got pumpernickel crumbs all down my back.
Me?
You called me suplototoveant... on Twitter.
[ Scoffs ] Man, that's just Twitter.
How's rehab going?
It's going.
In '05, torn ACL -- missed half the season.
But you...
you got shot. That's heavy.
It ain't no picnic.
T.K., those tweets -- not mine.
Who the hell was it -- Bobby Brown?
I got a guy -- Tweet master. Skinny, little white dude.
This alabaster bastard
wouldn't happen to be named Josh, would he?
[ Both laugh ]
Oh, my -- wait, okay,
so, this dude is fighting with himself,
and now we're taking the burn for it?
[ Chuckles ]
Trying to stay relevant out there --
it's a bitch, you know?
That it is.
Gentlemen...the owner of this lovely establishment
agreed not to press charges
in exchange for a couple of autographed photos.
Are we good?
Dare I ask who started this thing?
Josh. Josh.
[ Keyboard clacking ]
Jack, hello. It's Dr. Santino.
Listen, I think I know why you disappeared,
why all of this is happening now.
And if you reappear, I'll be happy to tell you.
And with the 16th pick of the third round,
Chicago selects Kawani Johnson,
cornerback from Ohio State University. [ Murmuring ]
And the run on corners continues.
What the hell do they need with Johnson?
Their secondary's totally stacked!
All right, we got six minutes to pull the trigger.
Who's the next best corner?
Washington got Billings. Pittsburgh got Kestler.
There's Anders out of Stanford or Holbrook out of Temple,
but we had 'em both going in the fourth.
Holbrook -- get Holbrook. Get him now.
Coach.
Look, Coach, I will support whatever you do,
but now we're passing on Damon Razor,
a guy who could be a franchise wideout, and --
and we're reaching for a fourth-round talent in the third round.
We're reaching for a corner. Hank, I want Holbrook.
[ Sighs ]
I hear you, old friend.
But Damon Razor... too good to pass up.
Terry, make the call.
Matt, let me see your draft board again.
There's some good thoughts in there.
Pick a card -- any card.
I have to admit, I was, uh...
I was intrigued by your phone message.
Come on, time is of the essence. Chop-chop.
[ Chuckles ]
The bride.
What's this about?
You never mentioned that your daughter's wedding
was on the same date as your stunt.
That's a good trick.
I don't do tricks.
Why don't you want to go to your daughter's wedding?
I've got to go.
Don't disappear on me again.
[ Sighs ]
I gave my whole life...
to this career.
On the road, different cities, different stunts.
But I guess if you disappear often enough,
even the people you love, they just start to forget about you.
Go on.
My daughter, Lacey, asked her...
stepfather if -- if he would walk her down the aisle.
Not me.
Okay.
Dr. Santino, when -- when my daughter was young,
I used to wow her with all these little magic tricks, right?
She'd love it. I could do no wrong, all right?
And then I got famous and ambitious
for bigger wows and bigger stunts.
I wasn't a good father.
I may be a star to all these strangers around the world.
But to my own daughter, I'm irrelevant.
You told me that your subconscious was telling you
not to go forward with the stunt.
I think you were right.
I think you want to see your daughter get married.
How do I start to repair it?
You come back from the dead.
[ Plastic rustling ]
And with the final pick in the 2012 draft,
Seattle selects Nathan Coder, punter,
Illinois State University. [ Indistinct conversations ]
Griffin: Listen, I know you're all exhausted
and want to go sleep for the next week.
But before you go, I want to congratulate everyone
on a successful draft.
Man: Yeah.
[ Indistinct conversations ]
Excellent work, Matt. Thank you.
Think we did good? Damn good.
Coach. [ Clears throat ] Look --
No apologies. You did your job, Matt.
Your grocery list -- meal goes bad, on you now.
[ Up-tempo music plays ]
Hey, Winter. Hi, honey.
Oh. Hi, Mrs. Santino.
Uh, is Lindsay here?
No, Lindsay -- Lindsay quit Pommies a few days ago.
Why? What happened?
I don't know. Um... [ Chuckles ]
She's just been acting so weird lately.
Where is she?
I have no idea.
[ Music continues ]
[ Indistinct conversations ]
[ Bell jingles ]
Hey.
Mom, how did you find me?
Magic.
And the... find-my-phone app.
[ Chuckles ] It's been coming in handy a lot lately.
Lindz, I know that you -- you quit Pommies.
Honey, would you please just tell me what's wrong?
Is it -- is it about Matt?
No. I like Matt.
Pommies is stupid.
I only tried out because Winter and all of my other friends did.
But lately, I just feel like I'm not like them.
Ray Jay has football and Olivia,
and you have this awesome career and now Matt.
What do I have?
Honey, it is so natural to feel this way,
particularly at your age.
I feel like...
I need someone to talk to.
I'm right here for you.
No, Mom, I need someone to talk to who isn't you.
Like a therapist.
Oh...kay.
[ Indistinct conversations ]
You and Minefield, free to Tweet.
Gangster.
What'd you say to him?
Better I don't tell you. [ Laughs ]
Burgers -- I'm buying.
Really? Yeah.
In an ever-changing world,
it's kind of nice to know that somebody's still got your back.
I like burgers. Prefer lobster.
Damn, you ain't no cheap date.
♪ Everybody's telling me ♪
♪ what to do ♪
♪ and I, I can't choose ♪
♪ and everybody's lost control ♪
[ Laughs ]
♪ Oh, hang me up by the noose ♪
King: Got to feel good for this year's Mr. Irrelevant,
the punter Nathan Coder.
He's probably not gonna make the team,
but he'll be able to tell his kids one day,
"hey, I got drafted to play pro football."
Guys. Hello.
Hey.
We were just about to... W-watch a movie.
Do you guys want to join us? Yeah.
Oh, come on. We can order pizza.
You guys pick the toppings, but no ham.
No pineapple.
And no War movies.
Yeah, no rom-coms either.
And no cellphones. How about that.
Off.
What do you guys want to watch?
Uw, I get the remote.
What. No.
Hey now.
This draft was one of the most turbulent in the last five years.
Now that the dust has settled
there's some winners, and some losers.
Likely some very bruised egos.
Speaking of winners in this draft,
I thought the New York Hawks, set themselves up pretty well.
They landed wide receiver, Damon Razor,
You got to wonder, if they felt the need
to go for a wideout, what does that say about
the future, of one Terrence King?
== sync, corrected by elderman ==