1
00:00:02,059 --> 00:00:06,158
- All right, my son? You look nervous!
- I am. How's it looking? All right?
2
00:00:06,211 --> 00:00:07,970
- Yeah, looks great.
- How's the set? All right?
3
00:00:07,971 --> 00:00:09,730
- Brilliant.
- Yeah, yeah. Audience are in?
4
00:00:09,731 --> 00:00:12,490
- Yeah, they're all in.
- Beautiful. What about the guests?
Guests are there?
5
00:00:12,491 --> 00:00:14,050
- Yeah, yeah. They're all in, Dad.
- Lovely, lovely.
6
00:00:14,227 --> 00:00:14,906
All in. Don't worry.
7
00:00:14,907 --> 00:00:17,046
What about, you know, the guy
that does the announcement?
8
00:00:17,142 --> 00:00:18,541
What?
9
00:00:18,756 --> 00:00:20,075
Oh, fucking hell.
10
00:00:20,100 --> 00:00:26,500
Subtitles by MemoryOnSmells
http://UKsubtitles.ru. Support Us and Donate.
11
00:00:26,553 --> 00:00:28,912
And now...
12
00:00:28,913 --> 00:00:31,592
live from London Town...
13
00:00:31,593 --> 00:00:33,712
it's Verry Terry!
14
00:00:33,713 --> 00:00:35,872
With tonight's special guests,
15
00:00:35,873 --> 00:00:39,872
Mr Mickey Rourke
and Miss Anthea Turner.
16
00:00:40,913 --> 00:00:44,312
And now, here he is...
17
00:00:44,313 --> 00:00:48,312
Mr Terry Tibbs!
18
00:00:50,624 --> 00:00:54,063
Ah. How are you? How are you?
How are you?
19
00:00:54,064 --> 00:00:56,963
Look at her face. Sort it out,
sort it out.
20
00:00:57,048 --> 00:00:58,267
How you doing? You all right?
21
00:00:59,079 --> 00:01:00,118
How are you?
22
00:01:00,305 --> 00:01:03,104
Terry Tibbs, we'll be working
together. Nice to see you, yeah.
23
00:01:03,105 --> 00:01:05,664
How are you? Nice to meet you.
Terry Tibbs.
24
00:01:05,665 --> 00:01:07,824
Take my card, take my card.
Hi, how are you?
25
00:01:07,825 --> 00:01:09,904
How are you? Terry Tibbs.
Very nice to meet you.
26
00:01:09,905 --> 00:01:11,464
Hi, Terry Tibbs.
Very nice to meet you.
27
00:01:11,465 --> 00:01:13,084
Hi, Terry Tibbs,
very nice to meet you.
28
00:01:13,162 --> 00:01:14,721
Hello. Welcome to Verry Terry.
29
00:01:15,637 --> 00:01:19,196
And I'm very proud to say that I
have my son in the audience tonight.
30
00:01:19,197 --> 00:01:20,956
Lionel, stand up for everyone.
31
00:01:22,317 --> 00:01:25,476
This is my son, Lionel.
Lionel, everyone. Single.
32
00:01:25,477 --> 00:01:26,956
He is single. Very good looking.
33
00:01:26,957 --> 00:01:30,956
Also, I have my dear father
in the audience tonight,
34
00:01:30,997 --> 00:01:33,116
ladies and gentlemen, that's right.
35
00:01:33,117 --> 00:01:34,536
How are you dad? You all right?
36
00:01:35,837 --> 00:01:38,116
Yeah, he's great. He's great.
He's having a good time.
37
00:01:38,117 --> 00:01:39,876
Having a good time.
Now, let me tell you.
38
00:01:39,877 --> 00:01:42,756
Now, we don't just gotoneguest,
oh, no.
39
00:01:42,757 --> 00:01:44,676
We don't just gottwoguests, we...
40
00:01:44,677 --> 00:01:47,316
Well, we got two guests, right,
41
00:01:47,317 --> 00:01:50,996
but what we also got is a live band,
ladies and gentlemen,
44
00:01:56,437 --> 00:02:00,436
He's actually sang at four
out of six of my divorces.
45
00:02:01,037 --> 00:02:02,996
It's unbelievable.
46
00:02:02,997 --> 00:02:06,756
First up, a man who needs no
introduction.
47
00:02:06,757 --> 00:02:10,756
He's a Hollywood legend and star of
such movies as
48
00:02:10,917 --> 00:02:14,916
9½ Weeks, Rumble Fish, Angel Heart,
49
00:02:16,997 --> 00:02:20,996
and, who could forget, his
Oscar-nominated turn in The Boxer.
50
00:02:22,597 --> 00:02:23,796
The Wrestler, Dad, Wrestler.
51
00:02:23,797 --> 00:02:25,916
Oh, fucking hell.
It's Mickey Rourke!
52
00:02:32,637 --> 00:02:34,796
Mickey Rourke! Mickey Rourke!
53
00:02:34,797 --> 00:02:38,796
Mickey! Mickey!
54
00:02:40,197 --> 00:02:41,156
How are you?
55
00:02:41,157 --> 00:02:42,436
Good. Looking good.
56
00:02:42,437 --> 00:02:43,076
Yeah.
57
00:02:43,077 --> 00:02:44,116
Let's do the thing.
58
00:02:44,117 --> 00:02:45,476
You look good.
59
00:02:45,477 --> 00:02:49,476
It's Mickey fucking Rourke,
ladies and gentlemen!
60
00:02:51,077 --> 00:02:54,196
Just unbelievable.
It's fucking unbelievable.
61
00:02:54,197 --> 00:02:55,916
You know they don't...
62
00:02:55,917 --> 00:02:58,636
You can't leave a place
in a fucking tip!
63
00:02:58,637 --> 00:02:59,956
Sorry about that, Mickey.
64
00:02:59,957 --> 00:03:01,276
It's OK.
65
00:03:01,277 --> 00:03:03,836
Yeah you take a seat, all right.
All right.
66
00:03:03,837 --> 00:03:06,476
Fuck me, it's Mickey Rourke.
Unbelievable.
67
00:03:06,477 --> 00:03:09,036
Did you fuck up the name of my movie?
68
00:03:09,037 --> 00:03:10,916
I have to admit...
69
00:03:10,917 --> 00:03:12,036
It's OK.
70
00:03:12,037 --> 00:03:13,236
Mickey I did, I apologise.
I was getting carried away.
71
00:03:13,237 --> 00:03:15,356
It's OK. We're good.
72
00:03:15,357 --> 00:03:17,476
You see? Forgiveness.
Ain't that right, Mickey?
73
00:03:17,477 --> 00:03:19,476
- We're good. We're all good.
- We're all good, yeah.
74
00:03:19,477 --> 00:03:21,196
Me and Mickey are cool,
that's right, we're cool as...
75
00:03:21,197 --> 00:03:22,236
As what? What are we like?
76
00:03:22,237 --> 00:03:23,036
As a cucumber.
77
00:03:23,037 --> 00:03:24,076
As a cucumber, yeah.
78
00:03:24,077 --> 00:03:24,876
As a cucumber.
79
00:03:24,877 --> 00:03:26,356
Yeah, I've heard about yours.
80
00:03:26,357 --> 00:03:26,876
Yeah.
81
00:03:29,877 --> 00:03:31,636
Fucking hell. Don't you think
Mickey's got a cool name?
82
00:03:31,637 --> 00:03:33,276
Yeah.
83
00:03:33,277 --> 00:03:35,356
It's not my real name.
84
00:03:35,357 --> 00:03:36,516
Is it not?
85
00:03:36,517 --> 00:03:37,836
My real name's Andre.
86
00:03:37,837 --> 00:03:39,156
Andre? Andre Rourke?
87
00:03:39,157 --> 00:03:43,156
Hi, my name's Andre Rourke
and I'm a Hollywood star.
88
00:03:45,037 --> 00:03:47,356
What I wanted to say, Mickey,
you're in London Town,
89
00:03:47,357 --> 00:03:49,236
and why are you in our great city?
90
00:03:49,237 --> 00:03:51,516
Well, I was in a really lovely
city before I got...
91
00:03:51,517 --> 00:03:52,556
I was in Wales.
92
00:03:52,557 --> 00:03:53,756
Oh, Wales? Yeah.
93
00:03:53,757 --> 00:03:57,076
Oh, Wales is lovely,
any Welsh people out here?
94
00:03:57,077 --> 00:03:58,556
Yes!
95
00:03:58,557 --> 00:03:59,116
Ah!
96
00:03:59,117 --> 00:04:00,836
Oh, fucking hell.
97
00:04:00,837 --> 00:04:04,276
Actually, stand up. We'd better
confirm this, Mickey.
98
00:04:04,277 --> 00:04:05,396
Oh, yeah, she's very pretty.
She's got to be from Wales.
99
00:04:05,397 --> 00:04:07,876
Oh, she's definitely Welsh.
Oh, yeah.
100
00:04:07,877 --> 00:04:09,676
Can we invite her over?
101
00:04:09,677 --> 00:04:12,156
- Oh, we could do later. Yeah?
- Yeah, I'm sure she'd love that. Yeah.
102
00:04:12,157 --> 00:04:16,076
Move your little ass over here, baby.
Yeah, look at that.
103
00:04:16,077 --> 00:04:19,476
I've seen it, Mickey, it's not that
little, to be honest.
104
00:04:19,477 --> 00:04:22,356
Never mind. Did you get
a lot of attention in Wales?
105
00:04:22,357 --> 00:04:23,436
And a lot of fat girls, yeah.
106
00:04:23,437 --> 00:04:26,796
Oh. I like this guy.
107
00:04:26,797 --> 00:04:28,836
Yeah.
108
00:04:28,837 --> 00:04:29,916
Oh, fat girls. Oh, yeah.
109
00:04:29,917 --> 00:04:32,516
Bouncing up and down, you know,
fucking nearly killing you.
110
00:04:32,517 --> 00:04:36,356
I mean that's... How do you think
he ended up in a wheelchair?
111
00:04:36,357 --> 00:04:38,156
Plus-size model fetish.
112
00:04:38,157 --> 00:04:39,196
Yeah.
113
00:04:39,197 --> 00:04:40,716
That's right. Look at him now, eh?
114
00:04:40,717 --> 00:04:43,356
Yeah but you know what they say about
every fucking supermodel, right?
115
00:04:43,357 --> 00:04:44,396
I know.
116
00:04:44,397 --> 00:04:46,596
There's only so long one can
sit on your face
117
00:04:46,597 --> 00:04:50,596
before you suffer irreparable
brain damage.
118
00:04:52,637 --> 00:04:54,756
What are you doing in Wales?
119
00:04:54,757 --> 00:04:58,756
I went to Wales to visit a friend
of mine who's a rugby player.
120
00:04:59,077 --> 00:05:00,676
Yeah.
121
00:05:00,677 --> 00:05:03,156
Who I'd met a couple of years ago
and asked him
122
00:05:03,157 --> 00:05:04,556
if I could do his life story.
123
00:05:04,557 --> 00:05:05,516
Gareth Thomas...
124
00:05:05,517 --> 00:05:07,076
Gareth Thomas.
125
00:05:07,077 --> 00:05:09,356
Now for those of you who don't know
who Gareth Thomas is...
126
00:05:09,357 --> 00:05:10,036
You tell them.
127
00:05:10,037 --> 00:05:11,116
Yeah, I will. Yeah.
128
00:05:11,117 --> 00:05:12,156
Thank you.
129
00:05:12,157 --> 00:05:16,156
Gareth Thomas is a Welsh rugby
player who's also a gay.
130
00:05:17,597 --> 00:05:18,316
A what?
131
00:05:18,317 --> 00:05:20,476
A gay. It was quite big news here,
you know...
132
00:05:20,477 --> 00:05:22,076
Big news everywhere.
133
00:05:22,077 --> 00:05:24,436
First gay sportsman to come out
the closet.
134
00:05:24,437 --> 00:05:26,436
Big balls. Does he?
135
00:05:26,437 --> 00:05:28,396
Yeah. You've seen them?
136
00:05:28,397 --> 00:05:29,956
- Like grapefruits.
- Like grapefruits.
137
00:05:29,957 --> 00:05:31,076
Grapefruits? Fucking hell.
138
00:05:31,077 --> 00:05:32,316
Like coconuts.
139
00:05:32,317 --> 00:05:36,316
Listen, I've got the number
of a very good plastic surgeon.
140
00:05:36,677 --> 00:05:38,796
He reduced mine.
They were like a couple of melons.
141
00:05:38,797 --> 00:05:39,436
Yeah, yeah.
142
00:05:39,437 --> 00:05:40,916
Oh, yeah. I had to juice them daily.
143
00:05:40,917 --> 00:05:42,196
Where are you staying?
144
00:05:42,197 --> 00:05:44,036
Where?
145
00:05:44,037 --> 00:05:45,676
- In London.
- I'm in Wales.
146
00:05:45,677 --> 00:05:48,276
Oh, you're not Mickey, you're in...
147
00:05:48,277 --> 00:05:52,156
Oh, OK. Right, yeah.
148
00:05:52,157 --> 00:05:53,916
Where are you staying in London,
though?
149
00:05:53,917 --> 00:05:55,116
Are you staying, are you going back
to Wales?
150
00:05:55,117 --> 00:05:57,596
Well, I'm staying in Wales,
but I'm in London right now.
151
00:05:57,597 --> 00:06:00,556
- Oh, right, and where are you staying?
- In Wales.
152
00:06:00,557 --> 00:06:02,236
Oh, right. So you come to London
for the night,
153
00:06:02,237 --> 00:06:03,276
you're going back to Wales.
154
00:06:03,277 --> 00:06:05,356
I told you I was staying with
a fat chick in Wales.
155
00:06:05,357 --> 00:06:05,876
In Wales.
156
00:06:05,877 --> 00:06:07,196
In Wales.
157
00:06:07,197 --> 00:06:09,056
That's amazing. I was going
to recommend the Premier Inn.
158
00:06:09,057 --> 00:06:10,716
What's the Premier Inn?
159
00:06:10,717 --> 00:06:13,836
Ah, let me tell you.
I'm glad you asked.
160
00:06:13,837 --> 00:06:15,636
OK, I've got a sponsorship
deal going on.
161
00:06:15,637 --> 00:06:17,076
I've got to do all this.
162
00:06:17,077 --> 00:06:21,076
Mickey, the Premier Inn,
is the premier place to stay.
163
00:06:21,637 --> 00:06:23,476
Yeah, but I heard it was
a really shit place.
164
00:06:23,477 --> 00:06:25,116
Eh? Who told you that?
That's not true.
165
00:06:25,117 --> 00:06:28,876
You get a complementary kettle
on arrival. That's right!
166
00:06:28,877 --> 00:06:31,916
You get a range of hot and cold
beverages. That's right!
167
00:06:31,917 --> 00:06:34,236
You get these little capsules,
right, with milk in,
168
00:06:34,237 --> 00:06:37,996
and the milk doesn't need
to be refrigerated.
169
00:06:37,997 --> 00:06:40,436
Actually, I'll tell you what,
I will give you, yeah,
170
00:06:40,437 --> 00:06:42,236
cos you're dissing the Premier Inn,
171
00:06:42,237 --> 00:06:45,356
I'm going to give you Colin's number
he's the area manager. All right?
172
00:06:45,357 --> 00:06:49,276
And give him a call. Just tell him
Terry sent you, yeah?
173
00:06:49,277 --> 00:06:52,276
Do you like an English breakfast?
Oh, you like a Welsh breakfast.
174
00:06:52,277 --> 00:06:54,996
I wouldn't stay in the Premier Inn
even with my fat girl
175
00:06:54,997 --> 00:06:58,756
if your life depended on it.
Verry Terry.
176
00:06:58,757 --> 00:07:00,276
Oh, eh.
177
00:07:00,277 --> 00:07:02,596
Wait a minute, Ferry Terry.
Ferry Terry?
178
00:07:02,597 --> 00:07:04,236
- Ferry Terry.
- Ferry Terry.
179
00:07:04,237 --> 00:07:06,796
Well, very Andre
and a little bit of Mickey.
180
00:07:06,797 --> 00:07:07,956
Hey listen, fuck that.
181
00:07:07,957 --> 00:07:10,956
I'm giving you
a recommendation, here.
182
00:07:10,957 --> 00:07:14,116
I was about to write down a voucher
card that would have given you,
183
00:07:14,117 --> 00:07:18,116
all right, late checkout and
an extra egg at breakfast time.
184
00:07:18,717 --> 00:07:21,076
But now you can fucking forget it!
185
00:07:21,077 --> 00:07:23,796
Ah. Hey.
186
00:07:23,797 --> 00:07:27,196
Throwing my generosity
back in my face.
187
00:07:27,197 --> 00:07:31,036
The truth is that
I'm a big fan of yours.
188
00:07:31,037 --> 00:07:31,796
Thank you, Terry.
189
00:07:31,797 --> 00:07:34,236
And I've seen most of your body
of work, you know,
190
00:07:34,237 --> 00:07:37,356
and most of it is outstanding,
all right.
191
00:07:37,357 --> 00:07:39,276
Now, I started off as
a car salesman.
192
00:07:39,277 --> 00:07:42,356
- Right.
- All right, you know, being
a car salesman, all right,
193
00:07:42,357 --> 00:07:45,236
is very much like being an actor,
you know, would you agree with that?
194
00:07:45,237 --> 00:07:46,476
Sure.
195
00:07:46,477 --> 00:07:50,356
Well, I'll tell you here,
bagged a little part as a bad guy
196
00:07:50,357 --> 00:07:54,356
in the Turkish action hero
franchise, Suede Protector.
197
00:07:54,957 --> 00:07:56,116
Yeah, that's right.
198
00:07:56,117 --> 00:08:00,116
I made my movie debut in the sequel,
Suede Protector 2: Brown Velvet.
199
00:08:04,797 --> 00:08:08,796
Run the tape.
200
00:08:14,517 --> 00:08:18,516
There's a guy.
201
00:08:19,597 --> 00:08:22,596
They say he can't be killed.
202
00:08:22,597 --> 00:08:24,396
Suede.
203
00:08:24,397 --> 00:08:28,396
They say he's part man...
204
00:08:29,197 --> 00:08:33,196
part machine.
205
00:08:35,077 --> 00:08:38,996
All suede.
206
00:08:46,197 --> 00:08:50,196
I want you to find him.
207
00:08:51,237 --> 00:08:54,636
And I want him dead.
208
00:08:57,557 --> 00:09:01,556
Two. Blue Velvet.
209
00:09:02,117 --> 00:09:04,156
Yeah, yeah.
210
00:09:04,157 --> 00:09:07,076
Nice one. We'll get you a copy
on DVD.
211
00:09:07,077 --> 00:09:08,396
That looks good that, right?
212
00:09:08,397 --> 00:09:10,756
Terrific. I love the way that
it went up in the air.
213
00:09:10,757 --> 00:09:13,436
Beautiful. All right.
I'm completely lost now.
214
00:09:13,437 --> 00:09:14,636
Autocue, dad.
215
00:09:14,637 --> 00:09:15,356
Eh? What?
216
00:09:15,357 --> 00:09:16,836
Autocue.
217
00:09:16,837 --> 00:09:20,396
Oh, yeah, the autocue.
Oh, thank God for the autocue.
218
00:09:20,397 --> 00:09:23,036
What does it say
on my autocue, Mickey?
219
00:09:23,037 --> 00:09:27,036
If he could give just one
piece of acting advice...
220
00:09:27,557 --> 00:09:31,556
What would it be?
221
00:09:31,997 --> 00:09:34,276
I would say try and complete
your sentences, you know,
222
00:09:34,277 --> 00:09:37,276
that's a good start.
223
00:09:37,277 --> 00:09:39,316
- Get a real job.
- Yeah, get a real job.
224
00:09:39,317 --> 00:09:42,516
- Get a real job.
- That's why I got this job, yeah.
I like it when he does that.
225
00:09:42,517 --> 00:09:45,276
That's good. The fist of peace.
Yeah, yeah.
226
00:09:45,277 --> 00:09:47,796
Ain't that nice.
Did you learn that in Wales?
227
00:09:47,797 --> 00:09:51,076
Yeah. When I was pounding
the fat girl.
228
00:09:51,077 --> 00:09:55,076
Oh, Mickey! I'm trying to raise
the tone, you're lowering the tone.
229
00:09:56,037 --> 00:09:58,996
Yeah, well.
230
00:09:58,997 --> 00:10:00,556
- Mickey.
- Yes.
231
00:10:00,557 --> 00:10:02,556
It's a bit of Mickey Rourke trivia,
yeah?
232
00:10:02,557 --> 00:10:03,156
Yeah.
233
00:10:03,157 --> 00:10:05,236
Apparently you don't watch
your films.
234
00:10:05,237 --> 00:10:05,956
Right.
235
00:10:05,957 --> 00:10:07,996
Until four and a half years
after you're made them.
236
00:10:07,997 --> 00:10:09,036
Several.
237
00:10:09,037 --> 00:10:11,556
Now The Wrestler's a very good film
and if you haven't seen it,
238
00:10:11,557 --> 00:10:15,236
let me just explain
what The Wrestler's about.
239
00:10:15,237 --> 00:10:19,156
Basically, right, Mickey plays
Randy the Ram Robinson, all right?
240
00:10:19,157 --> 00:10:21,916
Now Randy the Ram
is a wrestler, OK,
241
00:10:21,917 --> 00:10:24,796
and he does a lot of wrestling
and then he stops for a bit, yeah,
242
00:10:24,797 --> 00:10:27,556
and then he starts wrestling again
and then he gets a bad back...
243
00:10:27,557 --> 00:10:28,756
And a heart attack.
244
00:10:28,757 --> 00:10:31,636
And a heart attack,
and then he starts wrestling again.
245
00:10:31,637 --> 00:10:33,996
It's very, very good.
I like that film a lot.
246
00:10:33,997 --> 00:10:36,316
- Yeah, yeah.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oscar nominated may I add?
247
00:10:39,197 --> 00:10:42,156
There.
248
00:10:42,157 --> 00:10:46,156
Now apparently, Mickey, you once had
an erection for 9½ Weeks.
249
00:10:48,157 --> 00:10:49,596
True.
250
00:10:49,597 --> 00:10:51,156
Fuck me. What's your secret?
251
00:10:51,157 --> 00:10:52,196
We didn't talk.
252
00:10:52,197 --> 00:10:53,236
You didn't talk?
253
00:10:53,237 --> 00:10:53,756
No.
254
00:10:53,757 --> 00:10:56,156
Oh you and... She's got a lovely
pair of Bassingers.
255
00:10:56,157 --> 00:11:00,116
I understand. They even look lovelier
if you don't talk to one another.
256
00:11:00,117 --> 00:11:01,156
Oh I bet, I bet.
257
00:11:01,157 --> 00:11:02,636
- Yeah.
- What's her Kim like?
258
00:11:02,637 --> 00:11:05,436
I don't know, I never got there.
259
00:11:05,437 --> 00:11:06,836
Fucking hell.
260
00:11:06,837 --> 00:11:08,236
I proposed it, but I got shot down.
261
00:11:08,237 --> 00:11:11,596
Really, how did you do that?
You just laid it right on the table.
262
00:11:11,597 --> 00:11:13,476
Oh no, I went straight up to her
and said I want to...
263
00:11:13,477 --> 00:11:14,556
And she didn't do it?
264
00:11:14,557 --> 00:11:15,716
No.
265
00:11:15,717 --> 00:11:17,916
Hang about. You're doing it all
wrong then, you know? Right so...
266
00:11:17,917 --> 00:11:18,956
Too forward.
267
00:11:18,957 --> 00:11:20,476
Let's take it from the beginning.
268
00:11:20,477 --> 00:11:22,676
So Kim Bassinger is on set.
She's completely naked, right.
269
00:11:22,677 --> 00:11:23,716
Yeah.
270
00:11:23,717 --> 00:11:25,276
You walked up to her.
271
00:11:25,277 --> 00:11:27,276
No, I went to her when she was
dressed holding a balloon.
272
00:11:27,277 --> 00:11:28,316
Holding a balloon?
273
00:11:28,317 --> 00:11:29,436
Yeah.
274
00:11:29,437 --> 00:11:31,356
Where the fuck was she?
A kid's party?
275
00:11:31,357 --> 00:11:32,476
On the boardwalk.On the boardwalk?
276
00:11:32,477 --> 00:11:34,156
Yeah. On her own?
277
00:11:34,157 --> 00:11:35,516
Yeah. I just walked up and said
278
00:11:35,517 --> 00:11:37,196
"My God, I want to give it to you
all night long, sweetheart".
279
00:11:37,197 --> 00:11:38,316
Yeah?
280
00:11:38,317 --> 00:11:41,156
She said "I don't think so, Mickey."
281
00:11:41,157 --> 00:11:44,716
Fucking hell. Frigid bitch.
Never mind.
282
00:11:44,717 --> 00:11:47,716
That's why you moved to Wales.
Fucking hell!
283
00:11:47,717 --> 00:11:50,676
Mickey, have you ever made
a girl very angry?
284
00:11:50,677 --> 00:11:51,956
All of them.
285
00:11:51,957 --> 00:11:53,236
You make all of them angry?
286
00:11:53,237 --> 00:11:54,036
All of them.
287
00:11:54,037 --> 00:11:57,516
Why do girls get
so fucking angry all the time?
288
00:11:57,517 --> 00:12:01,516
Exactly which is why it's time
for Terry's angry birds.
289
00:12:02,677 --> 00:12:06,676
♪ They're birds and they're angry
They're Terry's angry birds. ♪
290
00:12:07,837 --> 00:12:10,476
Fucking hell. That's good.
291
00:12:10,477 --> 00:12:12,156
Let's play Terry's angry birds!
292
00:12:16,637 --> 00:12:19,116
So, who's our first angry bird?
293
00:12:19,117 --> 00:12:23,116
♪ They're birds and they're angry
They're Terry's angry birds. ♪
294
00:12:24,837 --> 00:12:27,676
Lauren Richards. Where are you?
295
00:12:27,677 --> 00:12:29,356
Oh, that's convenient isn't it?
296
00:12:29,357 --> 00:12:31,916
Ain't that convenient?
297
00:12:31,917 --> 00:12:35,916
So, Lauren, why are you an angry bird?
298
00:12:36,277 --> 00:12:40,076
♪ They're birds and they're angry
They're Terry's angry birds. ♪
299
00:12:40,077 --> 00:12:44,076
Why are you so fucked off?
300
00:12:44,117 --> 00:12:46,756
He dribbles in his sleep
301
00:12:46,757 --> 00:12:49,796
and I roll my face into it in the
night and it's just really annoying.
302
00:12:49,797 --> 00:12:52,116
Fucking hell.
Where do we get these fuckers?
303
00:12:52,117 --> 00:12:54,676
Eh? What have you got to
say for yourself?
304
00:12:54,677 --> 00:12:56,036
She loves it.
305
00:12:56,037 --> 00:12:57,156
You think she loves it? She does.
306
00:12:57,157 --> 00:12:58,196
Do you love it?
307
00:12:58,197 --> 00:12:59,756
No. Right, OK.
308
00:12:59,757 --> 00:13:02,356
She doesn't love it!
309
00:13:02,357 --> 00:13:05,356
Carrie Stanworth. Where's Carrie?
310
00:13:05,357 --> 00:13:06,836
Hello. Oh, hello.
311
00:13:06,837 --> 00:13:10,836
Ah-ha. Cue microphone. Oh, wow.
312
00:13:11,077 --> 00:13:12,836
Stand up for everyone
and give us a spin.
313
00:13:14,237 --> 00:13:18,196
Oh yeah, oh yeah.
314
00:13:18,197 --> 00:13:22,196
Mickey, I think she might be
from Wales.
315
00:13:23,797 --> 00:13:25,036
I'm half Welsh, actually.
316
00:13:25,037 --> 00:13:28,716
Oh, right. The top half
or the bottom half?
317
00:13:28,717 --> 00:13:30,756
- I love you, Mickey.
- Love you, too.
318
00:13:30,757 --> 00:13:32,836
All right.
319
00:13:32,837 --> 00:13:35,956
Carrie, why are you an angry bird?
320
00:13:35,957 --> 00:13:39,076
He's married to me but I think
he should be married to my mum,
321
00:13:39,077 --> 00:13:41,156
they get on far better.
322
00:13:41,157 --> 00:13:42,076
Oooh!
323
00:13:42,077 --> 00:13:46,076
And so why do you have a crush
on your wife's mother?
324
00:13:46,797 --> 00:13:50,796
Well, my mother-in-law's more into
darts and football and politics
325
00:13:50,837 --> 00:13:54,836
and fish fingers and things
like that.
326
00:13:56,517 --> 00:14:00,516
Who wants to make the sexual
innuendo joke following that one?
327
00:14:02,717 --> 00:14:06,716
You ever have a fish finger
up in Wales there, Mickey?
328
00:14:07,077 --> 00:14:10,476
How many fish fingers does she like?
329
00:14:10,477 --> 00:14:12,556
All of them.
330
00:14:13,797 --> 00:14:17,796
Fucking hell. Fuck me.
All right.
331
00:14:18,277 --> 00:14:21,316
You got your work cut out there,
darling.
332
00:14:21,317 --> 00:14:25,316
Jeremy Kyle's two studios
down that way.
333
00:14:26,077 --> 00:14:30,076
So, which one's the angriest bird?
Which one gets...
334
00:14:30,917 --> 00:14:34,516
an all-expenses-paid dinner
for two
335
00:14:34,517 --> 00:14:38,516
at Cafe Rouge?
336
00:14:38,517 --> 00:14:41,756
So, who wins, Mickey?
337
00:14:41,757 --> 00:14:45,036
It's number one. That's right.
338
00:14:45,037 --> 00:14:49,036
Stand up, stand up.
Stand up, stand up.
339
00:14:49,277 --> 00:14:50,676
All right.
340
00:14:50,677 --> 00:14:53,876
You have won dinner for two with
the star
341
00:14:53,877 --> 00:14:56,236
of the Suede Protector
action franchise!
342
00:14:56,237 --> 00:14:59,916
Come on out, now.
Come on, take your prize.
343
00:14:59,917 --> 00:15:03,916
Hang about, hang about, hang about,
hang about, hang about.
344
00:15:03,957 --> 00:15:05,636
Run to him sweetie, run to him.
345
00:15:09,037 --> 00:15:11,436
That's Mickey fucking Rourke.
346
00:15:11,437 --> 00:15:16,210
I'm Terry fucking Tibbs
and this is Verry Fucking Terry.
347
00:15:25,258 --> 00:15:27,577
Yeah, yeah. That's a good one, yeah.
I like that one.
348
00:15:27,578 --> 00:15:31,297
That kills me every time.
Welcome back to Verry Terry.
349
00:15:31,298 --> 00:15:34,097
Mickey Rourke is still with us.
How you doing, Mickey, all right?
350
00:15:34,098 --> 00:15:35,497
Good. Very good.
351
00:15:35,498 --> 00:15:36,857
I love you, Mickey.
352
00:15:36,858 --> 00:15:38,297
Yeah, I love you, too.
I love you, too.
353
00:15:38,298 --> 00:15:41,777
Now it's time to bring on
my next celebrity guest.
354
00:15:41,778 --> 00:15:45,297
She is a former Blue Peter presenter
355
00:15:45,298 --> 00:15:48,697
and reigning Royal Variety Club
of Great Britain
356
00:15:48,698 --> 00:15:52,697
Showbiz Personality
of the Year, 1996...
357
00:15:55,258 --> 00:15:57,617
it's Anthea Turner,
ladies and gentlemen.
358
00:15:58,938 --> 00:16:01,697
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
359
00:16:01,698 --> 00:16:04,377
Hello.
360
00:16:04,378 --> 00:16:08,057
Thank you.
361
00:16:08,058 --> 00:16:11,057
Oh, beautiful.
Beautiful. Beautiful.
362
00:16:11,058 --> 00:16:13,137
Anthea, how are you?
How are you, love...
363
00:16:13,138 --> 00:16:15,337
Oh, hello, oh. Mm. Oh, yeah,
oh, yeah. How are you?
364
00:16:15,338 --> 00:16:17,057
One more, mm, oh, one more.
Mm, two more.
365
00:16:17,058 --> 00:16:18,097
Oh. Ha. Oh.
366
00:16:18,098 --> 00:16:19,937
One on the forehead,
one on the forehead.
367
00:16:19,938 --> 00:16:20,977
Thank you!
368
00:16:20,978 --> 00:16:22,537
Yeah, that's good. Oh, fucking hell.
369
00:16:22,538 --> 00:16:24,577
All right, sit down.
It's all right. How are you?
370
00:16:24,578 --> 00:16:27,057
How are you, Anthea Turner?
Oh, yeah.
371
00:16:27,058 --> 00:16:30,217
I must say, I've always wanted
my Blue Peter vag.
372
00:16:30,218 --> 00:16:33,257
Badge, badge.
373
00:16:33,258 --> 00:16:37,057
Now, you are the face,
are you not, of Create A Craft,
374
00:16:37,058 --> 00:16:41,057
the website that allows you
to create whilst crafting.
375
00:16:41,218 --> 00:16:45,217
Well, because I spent all those years
making things on Blue Peter...
376
00:16:46,338 --> 00:16:48,457
Yeah, yeah.
377
00:16:48,458 --> 00:16:51,057
I love craft
and I love making things...
378
00:16:51,058 --> 00:16:53,097
You said that bit.
379
00:16:53,098 --> 00:16:55,657
And so therefore, you know,
I'm probably the ideal person
380
00:16:55,658 --> 00:16:56,817
to get Britain crafting.
381
00:16:56,818 --> 00:16:59,097
Mm. There's not enough crafting
that goes on.
382
00:16:59,098 --> 00:17:01,577
I know, but you can't
have idle hands.
383
00:17:01,578 --> 00:17:02,417
You can't.
Mickey would know about that.
384
00:17:02,418 --> 00:17:04,657
People are sitting at home
when they should be making things.
385
00:17:04,658 --> 00:17:06,217
I just want to hear about
this Blue Peter thing.
386
00:17:06,218 --> 00:17:08,057
Oh, Blue Peter. Oh, right, OK.
387
00:17:08,058 --> 00:17:09,097
Cos Mickey probably thinks
that Blue Peter's a person...
388
00:17:09,098 --> 00:17:11,937
I know. A lot of Americans think
it's a porn show and it's not.
389
00:17:11,938 --> 00:17:15,937
About 60/65 years old,
runs a sex shop in Bermondsey.
390
00:17:16,938 --> 00:17:20,937
He's probably in D Wing right now,
you know, doing 20-25. Anthea!
391
00:17:21,938 --> 00:17:22,977
Sorry.
392
00:17:22,978 --> 00:17:24,857
I was talking there and you
interrupted again. Unbelievable.
393
00:17:24,858 --> 00:17:26,697
I thought it was a chat.
394
00:17:26,698 --> 00:17:28,057
Oh, right.
Now you like to create, yeah?
395
00:17:28,058 --> 00:17:29,897
Yeah.
396
00:17:29,898 --> 00:17:30,777
You like to craft, yeah?
397
00:17:30,778 --> 00:17:31,617
Yeah.
398
00:17:31,618 --> 00:17:33,857
Are you ticklish?
399
00:17:33,858 --> 00:17:34,977
Yeah.
400
00:17:34,978 --> 00:17:38,417
Well, then let's
bring out a tickler!
401
00:17:38,418 --> 00:17:41,297
Ah!
402
00:17:41,298 --> 00:17:44,257
No, no, no! Leave him.
Get her, get her! Tickle her.
403
00:17:44,258 --> 00:17:46,137
Tickle her.
404
00:17:46,138 --> 00:17:49,617
That's it, that's it. Right there!
405
00:17:49,618 --> 00:17:53,497
Get her!
406
00:17:53,498 --> 00:17:55,937
All right, all right, all right.
407
00:17:55,938 --> 00:17:57,617
Fucking hell, hey,
that was exhilarating, wasn't it?
408
00:17:57,618 --> 00:18:00,137
Oh, dear. That was a bit...
I need to rearrange...
409
00:18:00,138 --> 00:18:01,417
Oh, you like that?
410
00:18:01,418 --> 00:18:03,777
Didn't touch you anywhere
he should have? Shouldn't have?
411
00:18:03,778 --> 00:18:06,777
No, no, no, no.
It was above-board tickling.
412
00:18:06,778 --> 00:18:08,697
Now, Anthea, you presented a show...
413
00:18:08,698 --> 00:18:09,857
Ah.
414
00:18:09,858 --> 00:18:11,377
Called A Perfect Housewife.
415
00:18:11,378 --> 00:18:12,777
I did.
416
00:18:12,778 --> 00:18:16,497
Now, sometimes we pay the price
for perfection, do we not, Mickey?
417
00:18:16,498 --> 00:18:19,417
Sometimes things
get a little obsessive.
418
00:18:19,418 --> 00:18:23,257
Sometimes we fall into addiction.
419
00:18:23,258 --> 00:18:26,217
You ever had an addiction, Mickey?
420
00:18:26,218 --> 00:18:28,977
You've got one now, haven't you?
421
00:18:28,978 --> 00:18:32,217
Fat Welsh chicks.
422
00:18:32,218 --> 00:18:35,417
20 a day apparently, fucking hell.
Is it true that you once had sex
423
00:18:35,418 --> 00:18:37,417
with 15 women in one night?
Is that true?
424
00:18:37,418 --> 00:18:39,017
Not supposed to talk about that.
425
00:18:39,018 --> 00:18:40,457
Are you not?
426
00:18:40,458 --> 00:18:43,017
Oh, well, that's good,
cos you nearly beat my record.
427
00:18:43,018 --> 00:18:47,017
Oh yeah, yeah. 19. Fucking hell.
Had to sew it back on again.
428
00:18:52,378 --> 00:18:55,977
Basically, I just wanted to say
that I have suffered an addiction,
429
00:18:55,978 --> 00:18:59,457
all right, and I'm overcoming it
now, all right?
430
00:18:59,458 --> 00:19:03,457
That was that I was a shopaholic,
and we'll see the trailer now
431
00:19:04,098 --> 00:19:08,097
for this documentary
that deals with my shopaholicism.
432
00:19:20,778 --> 00:19:23,617
Play the fucking tape.
433
00:19:23,618 --> 00:19:27,617
For his whole adult life, Terry Tibbs
has been addicted to buying things.
434
00:19:28,298 --> 00:19:29,737
Wooden ladders, talk to me.
435
00:19:29,738 --> 00:19:31,257
And it's ruining his life.
436
00:19:31,258 --> 00:19:34,057
I'll give you 49,999.
437
00:19:34,058 --> 00:19:36,057
Fucking hell.
438
00:19:36,058 --> 00:19:38,737
Terry's shopping compulsion has
led his son, Lionel, to seek help.
439
00:19:38,738 --> 00:19:39,897
My own son.
440
00:19:39,898 --> 00:19:42,257
We want to get into the inner Terry,
not the Terry that everybody sees.
441
00:19:42,258 --> 00:19:45,657
Inner Terry, oh, yeah.
I want to get to the inner Donna.
442
00:19:45,658 --> 00:19:49,337
Donna Dawson is a psychologist
who specialises in addiction.
443
00:19:49,338 --> 00:19:50,697
We're going to get you through this.
444
00:19:50,698 --> 00:19:51,657
Do you promise?
445
00:19:51,658 --> 00:19:53,897
Yeah. Keep moving.
Come on, keep moving this way.
446
00:19:53,898 --> 00:19:56,057
Look at me, look at me!
Focus. Focus. Look at me.
447
00:19:56,058 --> 00:19:58,017
I can't look any more.
448
00:19:58,018 --> 00:19:59,897
Look at me.
449
00:20:02,818 --> 00:20:03,417
Good.
450
00:20:03,418 --> 00:20:05,297
- I didn't buy anything.
- No.
451
00:20:05,298 --> 00:20:06,537
Come on, you're almost
halfway through.
452
00:20:06,538 --> 00:20:07,377
Halfway?
453
00:20:07,378 --> 00:20:08,057
Almost.
454
00:20:08,058 --> 00:20:09,377
Oh, for fuck's sake!
455
00:20:10,618 --> 00:20:13,577
What was the last thing you buy,
Anthea, anything good?
456
00:20:13,578 --> 00:20:15,057
- Pair of shoes this afternoon.
- Oh, fucking hell.
457
00:20:15,058 --> 00:20:16,257
They were in a sale.
458
00:20:16,258 --> 00:20:17,737
Oh, a sale. I love the sales.
Do you like the sales, Mickey?
459
00:20:17,738 --> 00:20:20,697
The what, sorry? The south?
460
00:20:20,698 --> 00:20:21,137
The sales.
461
00:20:21,138 --> 00:20:21,577
Sales.
462
00:20:21,578 --> 00:20:22,337
No, the sales.
463
00:20:22,338 --> 00:20:23,617
Southern cooking?
464
00:20:23,618 --> 00:20:24,657
No, no, the sales. The sales.
465
00:20:24,658 --> 00:20:25,137
Oh.
466
00:20:25,138 --> 00:20:26,457
The winter sales, the summer sales.
467
00:20:26,730 --> 00:20:27,709
Sales, yeah.
468
00:20:27,777 --> 00:20:31,776
Mid-season sales. Son, I'm having
a relapse. I'm having a relapse.
469
00:20:32,457 --> 00:20:34,236
Oh, Terry. Hold onto it,
hold onto it.
470
00:20:34,308 --> 00:20:35,247
Oh, that's good.
471
00:20:35,307 --> 00:20:37,986
Now, I am an entrepreneur,
you know, I sell cars.
472
00:20:37,987 --> 00:20:41,286
I take TV appearances.
I have my chat show.
473
00:20:41,286 --> 00:20:42,805
I have a good fucking life,
you know?
474
00:20:42,950 --> 00:20:46,029
And I'm trying to expand
the Tibbs' empire, right,
475
00:20:46,030 --> 00:20:49,629
so what I'm doing is,
I'm releasing my own scent.
476
00:20:49,630 --> 00:20:51,829
Ah.
477
00:20:51,830 --> 00:20:53,709
Just kidding with you.
478
00:20:53,710 --> 00:20:57,709
And it is... Head by Terry Tibbs.
479
00:21:00,470 --> 00:21:03,029
Look at that. Ain't that nice?
480
00:21:03,030 --> 00:21:06,189
Head by Terry Tibbs.
481
00:21:06,190 --> 00:21:08,869
Yeah? You like that?
Thank you, thank you.
482
00:21:08,870 --> 00:21:09,909
Oh, yeah, have a
little sniff of that.
483
00:21:09,910 --> 00:21:10,949
Is it unisex?
484
00:21:10,950 --> 00:21:13,389
Oh, no, no, it's not.
It's for men. It's very nice.
485
00:21:13,390 --> 00:21:14,589
Have a little sniff.
You like that?
486
00:21:14,590 --> 00:21:15,029
How lovely.
487
00:21:15,030 --> 00:21:17,349
Yeah, that'd make a great present.
488
00:21:17,350 --> 00:21:19,309
You could give
your dad Head for Christmas.
489
00:21:19,310 --> 00:21:21,469
He'd like that, wouldn't he? Yeah?
490
00:21:21,470 --> 00:21:22,749
That would be fabulous.
491
00:21:22,750 --> 00:21:24,029
Anthea, you could give your dad
Head for Christmas.
492
00:21:24,030 --> 00:21:26,349
He's an Old Spice man normally.
493
00:21:26,350 --> 00:21:28,429
Oh, is he? Yeah. I bet he is.
Well, give him Head, he'd prefer it.
494
00:21:28,430 --> 00:21:29,709
I will do.
495
00:21:32,590 --> 00:21:33,229
Now, Mickey.
496
00:21:33,230 --> 00:21:34,229
Yeah.
497
00:21:34,230 --> 00:21:35,549
Have you had a nice time?
498
00:21:35,550 --> 00:21:36,989
I've had a great time.
499
00:21:36,990 --> 00:21:38,989
Great time.
Anthea, have you had a nice time?
500
00:21:38,990 --> 00:21:40,949
I've had a lovely time,
thank you very much.
501
00:21:40,950 --> 00:21:42,589
Audience, have you had a nice time?
502
00:21:42,590 --> 00:21:44,589
Yeah.
503
00:21:44,590 --> 00:21:48,589
That's right. Well, you know what?
I've had a better than nice time.
504
00:21:49,230 --> 00:21:53,229
I've a better than better nice time.
In fact...
505
00:21:54,936 --> 00:21:58,935
♪ I've had the time of my life
506
00:22:00,376 --> 00:22:03,975
♪ And I've never
Felt this way before
507
00:22:03,976 --> 00:22:07,975
♪ Yes, I swear, it's the truth
508
00:22:08,136 --> 00:22:11,095
♪ And I owe it all to you
509
00:22:11,096 --> 00:22:15,095
♪ I've had the time of my life
510
00:22:16,856 --> 00:22:18,935
♪ And I owe it all to you
511
00:22:18,936 --> 00:22:21,615
♪ Rah, rah, ah-ah-ah,
Boom, ba wom, ba-ba
512
00:22:21,616 --> 00:22:25,135
♪ Oh, la, la-la-la
513
00:22:25,136 --> 00:22:27,095
♪ Want your bad romance. ♪
514
00:22:27,096 --> 00:22:29,295
Here they come, Mickey.
515
00:22:29,296 --> 00:22:32,135
Ladies and gentlemen, it's a wrap.
516
00:22:32,136 --> 00:22:35,015
Oh, yeah.
517
00:22:35,016 --> 00:22:37,815
♪ You know that I want you
You know that I need you. ♪
518
00:22:37,816 --> 00:22:39,015
Yes, I'm really not your type.
519
00:22:39,016 --> 00:22:42,615
♪ I want you bad
You bad romance. ♪
520
00:22:42,616 --> 00:22:45,975
♪ I kissed a girl and I liked it
521
00:22:45,976 --> 00:22:49,015
♪ The taste of
Her cherry chapstick. ♪
522
00:22:49,016 --> 00:22:49,575
Oh, not this...
523
00:22:49,576 --> 00:22:50,415
♪ You know that I want you... ♪
524
00:22:50,416 --> 00:22:51,415
No, we've been through all this.
525
00:22:51,816 --> 00:22:53,095
♪ You know that I need you... ♪
526
00:22:53,096 --> 00:22:54,055
Listen, I'm really not
that type of guy.
527
00:22:54,056 --> 00:22:56,735
♪ I want you bad
You bad romance... ♪
528
00:22:56,736 --> 00:22:59,735
♪ I want your loving
And I want your revenge
529
00:22:59,736 --> 00:23:02,695
♪ You and me
Could have a bad romance
530
00:23:02,696 --> 00:23:03,735
♪ Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah
531
00:23:03,736 --> 00:23:06,255
♪ I want your love
And I want your revenge
532
00:23:06,256 --> 00:23:09,095
♪ You and me
Could have a bad romance
533
00:23:09,096 --> 00:23:13,095
♪ Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah
Ah, ah, ah
534
00:23:13,376 --> 00:23:17,375
♪ Caught in a bad romance
Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah
535
00:23:17,456 --> 00:23:19,935
♪ La, la, la, la, la
536
00:23:19,936 --> 00:23:21,975
♪ Caught in a bad romance. ♪
537
00:23:21,976 --> 00:23:23,375
Fucking hell.
538
00:23:23,376 --> 00:23:26,215
♪ Rah, rah, ah-ah-ah
Roma, roma, roma-mah
539
00:23:26,216 --> 00:23:30,215
♪ Gaga, ooh, la-la
Want your bad romance. ♪
540
00:23:30,816 --> 00:23:32,535
This is Verry Terry.
541
00:23:32,536 --> 00:23:35,775
This is Verry Terry thanking you.
Much love!
542
00:23:35,804 --> 00:23:42,600
Subtitles by MemoryOnSmells
http://UKsubtitles.ru. Support Us and Donate.