1 00:00:03,000 --> 00:00:07,000 Fortysomething - 1x05 Transcript by wizyw (wizyw422@gmail.com) 2 00:00:32,203 --> 00:00:34,923 This is Paul Slippery. 3 00:00:47,100 --> 00:00:49,703 He thinks his wife is having an affair. 4 00:00:54,250 --> 00:00:55,778 Would you blame her? 5 00:01:14,780 --> 00:01:16,889 - Peter, hi, it's me. - Hello! 6 00:01:17,059 --> 00:01:18,326 - Can you talk? - Of course. 7 00:01:21,755 --> 00:01:23,470 Are you sure he doesn't suspect, darling? 8 00:01:23,693 --> 00:01:25,019 He's amazingly gullible. 9 00:01:25,173 --> 00:01:27,959 I always thought if I wanted to have an affair I'd have carte blanche. 10 00:01:28,226 --> 00:01:29,722 Who else are you trying to get your hands on? 11 00:01:29,903 --> 00:01:32,464 That would be telling! Are we still all right to meet? 12 00:01:32,645 --> 00:01:33,886 Can't wait! 13 00:01:34,130 --> 00:01:36,250 There's a lot I want to talk to you about, I'll see you in an hour. 14 00:01:36,495 --> 00:01:37,458 Au revoir. 15 00:01:55,476 --> 00:01:57,164 Good Lord! I was asleep. 16 00:01:57,399 --> 00:02:00,508 Well, that's what you do between midnight and 7:45. 17 00:02:01,887 --> 00:02:03,868 So, where are you off to today? 18 00:02:04,677 --> 00:02:07,127 Oh, you know, work, work. Same as usual. 19 00:02:07,643 --> 00:02:09,800 Of course! Of course, you're going to work. 20 00:02:10,066 --> 00:02:11,301 Where else would you be going? 21 00:02:13,324 --> 00:02:14,746 I have to go in today, too. 22 00:02:15,018 --> 00:02:17,371 It's Pilfrey's first day back after his enforced absence. 23 00:02:17,547 --> 00:02:18,761 Can I have a lift? 24 00:02:18,958 --> 00:02:20,816 Sorry, darling, I'm not going to the office this morning. 25 00:02:21,780 --> 00:02:23,446 That's funny. I thought you were. 26 00:02:23,734 --> 00:02:24,910 Going to work, I mean. 27 00:02:25,219 --> 00:02:27,674 No, no, I've got a meeting in another part of town. 28 00:02:28,628 --> 00:02:31,055 Another part of town, of course, stupid of me. 29 00:02:37,314 --> 00:02:39,076 What's happening this morning? Does he suspect anything? 30 00:02:39,257 --> 00:02:40,664 God, I hope not! 31 00:02:42,836 --> 00:02:43,805 Now, remember, Rory: 32 00:02:43,949 --> 00:02:45,077 - New man. - New man. 33 00:02:45,242 --> 00:02:47,531 - Consciousness raising. - Consciousness raising. 34 00:02:48,086 --> 00:02:49,321 Oh, God, it's such a strain. 35 00:02:49,635 --> 00:02:51,472 It's just so hard having to live in a lie, 36 00:02:51,621 --> 00:02:52,803 - I just... - Hi. 37 00:02:53,719 --> 00:02:55,465 Oh, hello. 38 00:02:57,547 --> 00:02:58,611 So, where's Daniel? 39 00:02:59,523 --> 00:03:00,773 Daniel had an urgent meeting. 40 00:03:01,088 --> 00:03:03,537 Daniel's no longer a proper member of this family in my opinion. 41 00:03:03,841 --> 00:03:05,422 He's completely pissed Laura off. 42 00:03:05,657 --> 00:03:07,446 Where are the girls? I haven't seen them about. 43 00:03:07,632 --> 00:03:10,087 That's cause we're having a "cooling off" period. 44 00:03:10,976 --> 00:03:13,852 They're coming over later today just to talk about things. 45 00:03:14,597 --> 00:03:17,303 Relationships are difficult things. 46 00:03:18,526 --> 00:03:19,953 People go through changes. 47 00:03:20,326 --> 00:03:22,568 They feel... differently about each other. 48 00:03:23,435 --> 00:03:24,740 It's not easy. 49 00:03:25,081 --> 00:03:28,133 Sometimes it can be very, very painful. 50 00:03:34,578 --> 00:03:35,638 What's that all about? 51 00:03:35,931 --> 00:03:37,885 He thinks something's up, he feels insecure. 52 00:03:40,675 --> 00:03:43,391 But the only thing that is up is that we all think 53 00:03:43,550 --> 00:03:45,137 that he's a wonderful husband and father, 54 00:03:45,297 --> 00:03:46,649 and that we love him dearly. 55 00:03:46,816 --> 00:03:49,370 Yes, I certainly think he's a wonderful man. 56 00:03:49,572 --> 00:03:53,174 And I'm very glad that later on today the two of us, father and son, 57 00:03:53,446 --> 00:03:56,592 are hosting a men's consciousness raising group. 58 00:03:56,789 --> 00:04:01,538 That's right! Right here, where you live as men to discuss your problems as men! 59 00:04:02,507 --> 00:04:05,422 Not that he has any problems as a man, 60 00:04:06,290 --> 00:04:07,903 or as a doctor, either. 61 00:04:08,467 --> 00:04:10,342 - Hello. - Hi, I was just... 62 00:04:10,602 --> 00:04:14,561 ...checking this paintwork. Need to do something about that paintwork. 63 00:04:14,956 --> 00:04:17,095 So where's Edwin? Don't tell me he's actually gone to school. 64 00:04:17,271 --> 00:04:19,763 No, I said he could stay here today, he's in bed with Woj and Snozzer. 65 00:04:20,024 --> 00:04:21,392 Woj and Snozzer? 66 00:04:21,669 --> 00:04:22,989 What is this, a knocking shop? 67 00:04:23,730 --> 00:04:26,372 I draw the line at my youngest son having threesomes when he should be 68 00:04:26,511 --> 00:04:28,763 boning up on the life and times of Pliny the Younger. 69 00:04:28,928 --> 00:04:30,313 We weren't having a threesome, dad. 70 00:04:30,472 --> 00:04:32,027 Don't even know what they are, do we, Woj? 71 00:04:32,176 --> 00:04:35,408 Even if we knew what they were, we weren't be getting involved in one, Mr Slippery. 72 00:04:35,568 --> 00:04:38,177 You can catch terrible diseases, especially of Snozzer. 73 00:04:38,347 --> 00:04:39,121 It's true. 74 00:04:39,258 --> 00:04:40,722 We were just sitting around and chatting and stuff. 75 00:04:41,159 --> 00:04:44,376 Yeah, you'd have to pay me money to have sex with your son, Mr Slippery. 76 00:04:44,519 --> 00:04:46,553 Yeah? How much to take him to school? 77 00:04:53,141 --> 00:04:56,829 So, off you go to your meeting in another part of London? 78 00:04:57,016 --> 00:04:58,065 Yes, off I go. 79 00:04:58,310 --> 00:04:59,721 What other part of London is it? 80 00:05:00,423 --> 00:05:01,945 - Turnham Green. - Turnham Green! 81 00:05:02,702 --> 00:05:04,603 Cause I've got a housecall in Turnham Green. 82 00:05:04,795 --> 00:05:06,680 - Have you? Who with? - A patient. 83 00:05:06,882 --> 00:05:08,751 So, you know, I could come with you. 84 00:05:09,474 --> 00:05:14,143 Oh, no, that wouldn't work because my meeting in Turnham Green 85 00:05:14,302 --> 00:05:18,210 is after my first meeting which is... in another part of town. 86 00:05:22,443 --> 00:05:23,870 It's funny, Estelle, 87 00:05:24,701 --> 00:05:29,756 that Rory and Daniel and Lucy and Laura are going through this crisis 88 00:05:30,859 --> 00:05:32,727 in terms of commitment, 89 00:05:33,755 --> 00:05:35,427 but you and me are still... 90 00:05:35,621 --> 00:05:36,599 What? 91 00:05:38,342 --> 00:05:39,481 You and me. 92 00:05:40,077 --> 00:05:41,153 Aren't we? 93 00:05:43,304 --> 00:05:45,157 We were the last time I looked. 94 00:06:14,183 --> 00:06:15,193 Hello, Surinder. 95 00:06:15,597 --> 00:06:16,620 You're back! 96 00:06:16,912 --> 00:06:19,628 Yes, I am. I don't know for how long, but I'm back. 97 00:06:20,347 --> 00:06:23,787 I fought with my demons, and I think I may have won. 98 00:06:24,309 --> 00:06:26,530 - You're early, too. - I am. 99 00:06:27,573 --> 00:06:28,670 I've had therapy. 100 00:06:28,894 --> 00:06:31,348 Much, much, much therapy. I've grown, I've changed, 101 00:06:31,530 --> 00:06:34,257 I've developed. Have you read the Little Book of Growth and Change? 102 00:06:35,114 --> 00:06:35,950 No. 103 00:06:36,152 --> 00:06:38,271 No. All right, it's in Chinese. 104 00:06:39,635 --> 00:06:44,498 I've taken a long, hard, good and intensive look at myself, 105 00:06:44,669 --> 00:06:46,565 and I didn't like what I saw. I saw... 106 00:06:46,959 --> 00:06:49,648 I saw a twisted, twisted, twisted individual. 107 00:06:50,361 --> 00:06:51,735 No change there, then. 108 00:06:52,065 --> 00:06:53,020 Say again? 109 00:06:53,738 --> 00:06:55,064 Joke. 110 00:06:57,981 --> 00:06:59,589 Yes, good. Joke. 111 00:07:00,393 --> 00:07:01,575 Good joke. 112 00:07:03,290 --> 00:07:04,706 Thanks for that, Surinder. 113 00:07:07,303 --> 00:07:08,837 So what's up with your dad? 114 00:07:09,162 --> 00:07:12,303 My mum's organising some kind of surprise reunion for him. 115 00:07:12,558 --> 00:07:13,677 She thinks it'd cheer him up. 116 00:07:13,868 --> 00:07:15,381 He didn't look too cheerful. 117 00:07:15,998 --> 00:07:17,819 Wait till you see his face when he sees the video. 118 00:07:18,075 --> 00:07:19,470 Making a compilation. 119 00:07:22,020 --> 00:07:23,650 Are you and Edwin going out, Woj? 120 00:07:25,428 --> 00:07:27,382 Ours is a doomed love, Snozzer. 121 00:07:42,501 --> 00:07:44,737 The other end of town, eh? 122 00:07:49,259 --> 00:07:50,307 Surinder. 123 00:07:51,235 --> 00:07:52,694 The woman I should've married. 124 00:07:53,487 --> 00:07:55,838 This is unexpected. Should I have married you? 125 00:07:56,115 --> 00:07:57,648 - Yes, you definitely should have! - Who are you calling? 126 00:07:59,656 --> 00:08:01,605 Paul? Where are you? 127 00:08:02,510 --> 00:08:05,390 Surinder, my life is in a total mess. 128 00:08:05,662 --> 00:08:06,924 - Hello. - Are you okay? 129 00:08:07,057 --> 00:08:08,393 Are you here for the meeting? 130 00:08:08,622 --> 00:08:10,981 - Which meeting is that? - The AA meeting. 131 00:08:11,194 --> 00:08:13,393 - No, I'm RAC. - Paul? 132 00:08:13,611 --> 00:08:15,374 Alcoholics Anonymous. 133 00:08:15,762 --> 00:08:16,955 Alcoholics Anonymous? 134 00:08:18,419 --> 00:08:20,794 What am I doing outside an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting? 135 00:08:20,986 --> 00:08:23,393 Surinder, did I hear Paul say he was an alcoholic? 136 00:08:23,584 --> 00:08:27,125 - I'm not an alcoholic! - Nobody said you were. 137 00:08:27,328 --> 00:08:29,596 Although I think perhaps my wife may be one. 138 00:08:29,804 --> 00:08:30,710 Why is that? 139 00:08:30,922 --> 00:08:32,997 Look, Surinder, I... why are you asking me these questions? 140 00:08:33,136 --> 00:08:35,027 Why are you interfering with my life in the first place? 141 00:08:35,788 --> 00:08:38,003 Because you're blocking my driveway. 142 00:08:39,068 --> 00:08:41,531 Fine, I'm blocking the driveway, all right, I'll move the car, 143 00:08:41,686 --> 00:08:42,846 and get out of your life. 144 00:08:43,027 --> 00:08:44,469 Surinder, just give me a moment. 145 00:08:44,635 --> 00:08:46,845 Paul! Paul, I'm here. We want to help you, Paul. 146 00:08:47,058 --> 00:08:48,576 Pilfrey? Is that you? 147 00:08:48,730 --> 00:08:50,530 I wasn't aware I was having a conversation with you! 148 00:08:50,987 --> 00:08:53,096 Paul! Paul, speak to me! 149 00:08:54,666 --> 00:08:57,352 Could you possibly move your car? My wife wants to go out. 150 00:08:57,603 --> 00:09:00,472 There is no way I can drive this car! They might see me! 151 00:09:00,888 --> 00:09:04,205 I think we both know why you can't drive this car. 152 00:09:05,712 --> 00:09:08,167 Yes. Yes, you're absolutely right. 153 00:09:08,955 --> 00:09:11,580 I'm completely drunk. I'm absolutely blotto. 154 00:09:12,330 --> 00:09:14,976 I'm usually totally pissed at 9:30 in the morning. 155 00:09:15,161 --> 00:09:17,495 Would you like me to drive the car for you? 156 00:09:17,761 --> 00:09:19,941 Yes. Yes, I would like that very much. 157 00:09:20,197 --> 00:09:21,177 You carry on. 158 00:09:22,577 --> 00:09:23,552 You still there Surinder? 159 00:09:23,743 --> 00:09:26,178 Yes, we are here. I mean I'm here, I am. 160 00:09:26,337 --> 00:09:27,588 Right, I'll call you back. 161 00:09:49,410 --> 00:09:52,360 But he does suspect something, Peter, he's behaving really oddly. 162 00:09:52,515 --> 00:09:54,714 I sort of thought he's been following me or something. 163 00:09:55,033 --> 00:09:58,849 Look, if you're worried about him finding out, you'd better get hold of good old Steve. 164 00:09:59,041 --> 00:10:01,261 He's made an appointment to see Paul this morning. 165 00:10:01,459 --> 00:10:02,348 About his ears. 166 00:10:02,502 --> 00:10:03,822 He'd probably blurt out the whole thing! 167 00:10:03,966 --> 00:10:05,681 We can't have that, you've got to call him! 168 00:10:05,851 --> 00:10:08,119 Ear problem, can't use his mobile. 169 00:10:08,817 --> 00:10:10,397 I'll have to go to the surgery. 170 00:10:10,632 --> 00:10:12,144 You are wonderful. 171 00:10:20,052 --> 00:10:22,002 You swine! 172 00:10:27,600 --> 00:10:28,830 Are you okay? 173 00:10:30,374 --> 00:10:32,126 Yes, I'm fine. I'm fine. 174 00:10:32,270 --> 00:10:34,144 I've been better but I'm fine. 175 00:10:34,379 --> 00:10:36,248 It doesn't help being drunk perhaps. 176 00:10:36,466 --> 00:10:38,265 No, I'm not drunk. I'm completely sober. 177 00:10:38,505 --> 00:10:39,464 Right. 178 00:10:41,226 --> 00:10:42,520 Can I have my car keys? 179 00:10:42,845 --> 00:10:43,707 Don't worry. 180 00:10:44,612 --> 00:10:45,826 You'll get your keys. 181 00:10:47,866 --> 00:10:49,320 Can I have them now? 182 00:10:49,853 --> 00:10:52,909 Friends don't let friends drive. 183 00:10:54,123 --> 00:10:55,097 What? 184 00:11:09,306 --> 00:11:10,499 Paul! 185 00:11:11,020 --> 00:11:12,187 Hi. 186 00:11:13,203 --> 00:11:14,188 Peter! 187 00:11:14,444 --> 00:11:15,749 You two know each other? 188 00:11:16,979 --> 00:11:19,038 Yes, we do. We do. 189 00:11:19,279 --> 00:11:20,956 Although I haven't seen Peter for years. 190 00:11:21,296 --> 00:11:22,415 How are you? 191 00:11:23,937 --> 00:11:25,992 A lot has happened in my life, Paul. 192 00:11:27,148 --> 00:11:28,064 Yeah, I bet. 193 00:11:28,357 --> 00:11:30,346 Paul's thinking of coming to the meeting. 194 00:11:30,825 --> 00:11:31,804 Am I? 195 00:11:33,535 --> 00:11:35,630 I think that's why he found himself here. 196 00:11:35,809 --> 00:11:37,189 I see. 197 00:11:37,466 --> 00:11:40,652 - No, all I want is my car keys! - You don't want to come in with us? 198 00:11:40,913 --> 00:11:43,405 Isn't there anything you want to get off your chest? 199 00:11:44,161 --> 00:11:47,402 I don't see there's any point in my attending an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting. 200 00:11:47,822 --> 00:11:49,297 Why is that, Paul? 201 00:11:49,564 --> 00:11:51,236 Because I'm not an alcoholic. 202 00:11:51,843 --> 00:11:53,898 - Right. - Sure. 203 00:11:57,775 --> 00:12:01,750 Sometimes Paul it's really hard to face up to things in yourself. 204 00:12:02,304 --> 00:12:06,949 We rather lost touch when I was going through what I went through. 205 00:12:08,233 --> 00:12:10,074 Sometimes it was like being in a room, you know, 206 00:12:10,314 --> 00:12:12,758 in a big, dark room. 207 00:12:13,348 --> 00:12:15,345 Sometimes things went very fast, 208 00:12:16,107 --> 00:12:18,896 sometimes they flattened out like a plate. 209 00:12:21,154 --> 00:12:22,571 You're an alcoholic. 210 00:12:23,715 --> 00:12:24,663 I am. 211 00:12:25,435 --> 00:12:27,111 And he's an alcoholic. 212 00:12:29,242 --> 00:12:31,192 And you both think that I...? 213 00:12:36,507 --> 00:12:37,636 Oh, why not. 214 00:12:37,924 --> 00:12:39,936 - Say it! - Say it. 215 00:12:41,949 --> 00:12:44,638 I am an alcoholic. 216 00:12:46,181 --> 00:12:47,885 I'm glad you had the courage to say that, Paul. 217 00:12:54,499 --> 00:12:55,735 Hi, Lisa, is she in? 218 00:12:56,123 --> 00:12:57,289 Okay. 219 00:13:02,746 --> 00:13:06,343 Well, what's made you late today? Did Paul lost his trousers? 220 00:13:06,615 --> 00:13:09,165 I'm really sorry, Gwendolen, but I'm trying to organise this 221 00:13:09,330 --> 00:13:11,215 reunion thing for him because he's... 222 00:13:11,726 --> 00:13:14,303 Well, he's falling to bits really and I don't know what to do to help him and... 223 00:13:15,145 --> 00:13:17,030 I've got to go to the surgery. 224 00:13:17,248 --> 00:13:19,692 You'll be cutting up his food for him next. 225 00:13:19,937 --> 00:13:24,123 Look, we have a presentation here at 3:00. You're leading it. 226 00:13:24,338 --> 00:13:26,743 I know. I'll be here at 3:00. 227 00:13:34,325 --> 00:13:35,812 My name is Peter... 228 00:13:36,579 --> 00:13:38,043 and I'm an alcoholic. 229 00:13:38,389 --> 00:13:39,955 - Hello, Peter. - Hi, Peter. 230 00:13:41,057 --> 00:13:42,085 Fair enough. 231 00:13:44,880 --> 00:13:47,490 I'm not really functioning very well at the moment. 232 00:13:48,811 --> 00:13:50,340 I'm feeling very... 233 00:13:51,559 --> 00:13:52,709 flat. 234 00:13:55,323 --> 00:13:58,571 Some weeks ago I met a woman at a bar, and... 235 00:13:59,316 --> 00:14:02,555 went home with her. She was wearing a... 236 00:14:03,940 --> 00:14:05,644 a thong. 237 00:14:07,092 --> 00:14:08,441 Indeed. 238 00:14:11,069 --> 00:14:14,020 Later another woman arrived and... 239 00:14:15,107 --> 00:14:19,787 She seemed to be a friend of this woman's and... 240 00:14:20,398 --> 00:14:21,657 She had... 241 00:14:22,364 --> 00:14:23,829 She had this... 242 00:14:25,238 --> 00:14:26,548 hose. 243 00:14:28,151 --> 00:14:29,529 And we... 244 00:14:30,775 --> 00:14:32,052 you know... 245 00:14:33,837 --> 00:14:35,355 made love. 246 00:14:36,856 --> 00:14:38,848 Which made me feel... 247 00:14:40,711 --> 00:14:42,218 confused. 248 00:14:44,609 --> 00:14:47,057 Later on a man arrived in a cloak. 249 00:14:48,847 --> 00:14:50,540 And he had a whip. 250 00:14:51,702 --> 00:14:56,450 Which made me feel even more confused, I suppose. 251 00:14:59,038 --> 00:15:02,689 And there was someone now... with another hose. 252 00:15:04,595 --> 00:15:08,701 It was a bigger hose than the first hose. 253 00:15:09,892 --> 00:15:15,136 Although that was still in... in... in evidence. 254 00:15:19,320 --> 00:15:20,375 Thank you. 255 00:15:20,717 --> 00:15:22,705 - Thank you. - Thank you. 256 00:15:29,732 --> 00:15:32,705 - Where's Dan? - Urgent meeting, running late. 257 00:15:32,903 --> 00:15:34,328 He's acting so weird lately. 258 00:15:34,510 --> 00:15:35,774 What kind of weird? 259 00:15:36,078 --> 00:15:38,252 Hi. Urgent meeting, running late. 260 00:15:39,159 --> 00:15:40,695 Text message from Sweden. 261 00:15:42,707 --> 00:15:43,777 What up? 262 00:15:45,822 --> 00:15:48,606 Okay, uhm... Laura and I have been talking... 263 00:15:49,032 --> 00:15:51,902 - And? - You say it, Laura. 264 00:15:53,689 --> 00:15:55,552 We don't think it's going anywhere. 265 00:15:56,503 --> 00:16:01,093 - Rory, Lucy's very fond of you... - She can't speak for herself? 266 00:16:01,360 --> 00:16:03,007 ...but it doesn't seem right. 267 00:16:04,098 --> 00:16:06,873 And Dan... you and me... 268 00:16:08,447 --> 00:16:10,571 Well, it all seems a horrible mess somehow. 269 00:16:11,712 --> 00:16:14,228 I'm sorry, it's over. 270 00:16:14,987 --> 00:16:16,523 For all of us. 271 00:16:19,021 --> 00:16:21,121 Do you two always do everything together? 272 00:16:21,330 --> 00:16:22,433 - Yes. - Yeah. 273 00:16:22,625 --> 00:16:25,260 So that's it? You're not gonna talk about it, you're just gonna walk out like that? 274 00:16:25,401 --> 00:16:27,227 - That's it? - I'm afraid we are. 275 00:16:28,018 --> 00:16:29,568 It's all my fault, really. 276 00:16:30,513 --> 00:16:31,649 I'm sorry. 277 00:16:40,494 --> 00:16:41,768 Thanks a lot. 278 00:16:44,760 --> 00:16:46,288 This is my fault? 279 00:16:47,204 --> 00:16:48,445 I don't know. 280 00:16:51,721 --> 00:16:54,340 There are girls on every corner, my brother. 281 00:16:57,753 --> 00:16:59,409 Coming to your neck of the woods today. 282 00:16:59,648 --> 00:17:00,495 Why? 283 00:17:00,820 --> 00:17:02,444 There's money in poverty. 284 00:17:04,491 --> 00:17:07,659 Paul, would you like to share? 285 00:17:14,943 --> 00:17:17,547 Okay. Okay. 286 00:17:20,976 --> 00:17:22,579 My name is Paul... 287 00:17:24,175 --> 00:17:26,914 and I'm not an alcoholic. 288 00:17:27,904 --> 00:17:31,731 I mean, I plan on being one, in the very near future. 289 00:17:32,359 --> 00:17:34,374 I don't know if it qualifies me to be at this meeting, 290 00:17:34,528 --> 00:17:38,379 but it does seem to be the only way out of the situation that I'm in. 291 00:17:39,428 --> 00:17:43,433 I plan on drinking a hell of a lot very soon. 292 00:17:45,313 --> 00:17:46,648 My wife... 293 00:17:48,486 --> 00:17:50,206 Can't believe I'm telling you this... 294 00:17:51,473 --> 00:17:54,138 But the fact is my wife is... 295 00:18:00,485 --> 00:18:03,052 also not an alcoholic. 296 00:18:04,218 --> 00:18:05,815 As far as I can tell. 297 00:18:06,763 --> 00:18:09,415 You just never know how to spot one these days, do you? 298 00:18:09,926 --> 00:18:11,491 And they're everywhere really... 299 00:18:11,678 --> 00:18:13,562 Pretending to drink mineral water, 300 00:18:13,749 --> 00:18:16,997 and then they're off around the back having a crafty belt for the old vodka. 301 00:18:18,094 --> 00:18:20,997 I don't need to tell you lot that obviously, cause... 302 00:18:21,269 --> 00:18:24,853 Presumably you're no strangers to the well-camouflaged hip flask... 303 00:18:25,689 --> 00:18:28,378 The large Macallans on your cornflakes in the morning. 304 00:18:32,069 --> 00:18:34,621 Not that there's anything so terribly wrong with that. 305 00:18:35,526 --> 00:18:37,634 I mean, Peter and I... 306 00:18:38,130 --> 00:18:40,626 We used to knock back a few in the old days. 307 00:18:41,148 --> 00:18:42,773 We never used to make a fuss about it then. 308 00:18:43,240 --> 00:18:46,747 Although obviously now he... goes on about it all the time. 309 00:18:48,307 --> 00:18:52,691 Not that there's anything wrong with... with... going on about it. 310 00:18:55,864 --> 00:18:58,482 I mean I have been rat-arsed in my time. 311 00:18:59,770 --> 00:19:04,655 I was hammered for 3 days straight when I found out about Sue Drake. 312 00:19:06,805 --> 00:19:08,376 Sue Drake. 313 00:19:10,032 --> 00:19:12,642 But it was before I got married, obviously. 314 00:19:13,068 --> 00:19:16,715 I've been happily married now for 20 years. 315 00:19:19,165 --> 00:19:20,970 And my wife has... 316 00:19:23,009 --> 00:19:24,916 ...has just gone back to work. 317 00:19:26,901 --> 00:19:30,444 My kids are growing up and growing away from me. 318 00:19:33,175 --> 00:19:34,453 And I suppose I... 319 00:19:34,607 --> 00:19:37,115 I just feel as if I don't count anymore. 320 00:19:40,716 --> 00:19:43,342 So although I'm not an alcoholic, 321 00:19:44,536 --> 00:19:47,053 I am quite screwed up enough to be one. 322 00:19:48,053 --> 00:19:49,991 And you know, I feel quite at home here. 323 00:19:51,131 --> 00:19:54,171 You all seem very nice. 324 00:19:54,773 --> 00:19:57,973 And I must say I was devastated to learn that old Peter was a lush. 325 00:19:58,851 --> 00:20:02,121 As I haven't seen him for six years so... 326 00:20:02,781 --> 00:20:03,958 You know... 327 00:20:05,737 --> 00:20:07,126 What can I say? 328 00:20:12,189 --> 00:20:14,596 - Thank you. - Thank you. 329 00:20:15,496 --> 00:20:17,440 - Thank you. - Thank you, Paul. 330 00:20:18,627 --> 00:20:20,570 Can I have my car keys back now? 331 00:20:27,855 --> 00:20:28,936 Hi. 332 00:20:29,778 --> 00:20:31,912 - Hi. - I'm Harry. 333 00:20:32,402 --> 00:20:33,776 The new Führer. 334 00:20:34,090 --> 00:20:36,651 - Oh, hi. - Sorry I haven't said hi before, 335 00:20:36,789 --> 00:20:38,898 my feet haven't touched the ground since I got here. 336 00:20:39,239 --> 00:20:41,082 - Where were you before? - Before? 337 00:20:41,256 --> 00:20:43,217 Before homelessness called. 338 00:20:43,451 --> 00:20:45,219 Oh, University of Ryegate, you? 339 00:20:45,379 --> 00:20:46,358 I've been all over. 340 00:20:46,518 --> 00:20:49,585 I was with Age Concern, trying to drag them into the 21st century. 341 00:20:49,814 --> 00:20:51,933 I kicked arse with the Samaritans. 342 00:20:52,167 --> 00:20:54,185 They were phoning each other by the time I was through. 343 00:20:56,214 --> 00:20:58,025 - You're a... - Kind of like a manager. 344 00:20:58,200 --> 00:20:59,931 Gorilla manager. 345 00:21:00,767 --> 00:21:03,141 Charities are not nice, my friend. 346 00:21:03,988 --> 00:21:06,299 The world of philanthropy is a tough one. 347 00:21:06,554 --> 00:21:09,738 I've called a big meeting this afternoon to discuss our management structure. 348 00:21:10,431 --> 00:21:13,142 Be there or be square, my friend. 349 00:21:13,817 --> 00:21:17,965 We are about to modernise and it is not a time for old fashioned sentiment. 350 00:21:18,215 --> 00:21:20,979 No sleeping bag is safe. 351 00:21:22,427 --> 00:21:26,053 - Nice to meet you. - Nice to meet you, too. 352 00:21:33,897 --> 00:21:35,287 - Paul! - Hi. 353 00:21:36,368 --> 00:21:38,162 Pilfrey. Welcome back. 354 00:21:42,551 --> 00:21:43,477 Good. 355 00:21:45,255 --> 00:21:46,257 Look, Rosie... 356 00:21:46,767 --> 00:21:49,377 I'm gonna be seeing a chap called Steve Norish, 357 00:21:49,563 --> 00:21:51,538 and for reasons I don't really want to go into 358 00:21:51,730 --> 00:21:56,368 it's possible that my wife may turn up and want to see him while I'm seeing him. 359 00:21:56,543 --> 00:21:58,727 - Do not let her in! Okay? - Fair enough. 360 00:22:03,295 --> 00:22:05,612 He has real pain in his marriage. 361 00:22:06,496 --> 00:22:08,545 - How'd you work that out? - He's strained and tight! 362 00:22:08,732 --> 00:22:09,946 I know the signs. 363 00:22:10,627 --> 00:22:12,865 See, I'm sexually very giving. 364 00:22:13,615 --> 00:22:17,220 Locked in a marriage and I realised that's loveless in spite of Gordon and all he's done. 365 00:22:17,427 --> 00:22:19,568 Bit like a carpet and a hairbrush, if you will. 366 00:22:20,319 --> 00:22:24,163 But here I am, trying to work my way back to the hearts and minds of this practice. 367 00:22:26,193 --> 00:22:28,221 - What are you on about, Pilfrey? - Ronnie, Ronnie. 368 00:22:28,397 --> 00:22:31,086 Paul is flipping, that's what we say in therapy class. 369 00:22:31,746 --> 00:22:33,157 He sees things, he's having delusions. 370 00:22:33,301 --> 00:22:37,006 Why would Estelle suddenly bust in here, demand to see one of his patients? 371 00:22:38,014 --> 00:22:41,524 Rosie, Rosie! Is Paul seeing someone called Steve Norish? 372 00:22:43,250 --> 00:22:46,226 When I get the wax out of my ear, it's a rather peculiar colour. 373 00:22:47,520 --> 00:22:48,911 And how'd you get it out? 374 00:22:49,677 --> 00:22:51,950 - My fingernails. - Yeah, me too. 375 00:22:52,867 --> 00:22:54,964 Well, I can't find anything wrong with you, I'm afraid. 376 00:22:55,380 --> 00:22:58,425 Although you probably shouldn't be drinking 29.5 pints of beer a week. 377 00:22:59,176 --> 00:23:00,242 Nah. 378 00:23:01,753 --> 00:23:06,277 Do you ever feel as if you're alone in a big dark room, 379 00:23:06,633 --> 00:23:07,687 with a plate? 380 00:23:08,576 --> 00:23:10,701 - What? - Nothing. 381 00:23:11,973 --> 00:23:13,219 How's Estelle? 382 00:23:14,641 --> 00:23:16,356 Perhaps I should be asking you that. 383 00:23:17,159 --> 00:23:18,581 Should you? 384 00:23:19,939 --> 00:23:22,489 Look, Steve. We've known each other a long time, 385 00:23:22,649 --> 00:23:24,470 I don't think we have to beat about the bush. 386 00:23:25,466 --> 00:23:27,915 What I mean is I'm pretty sure I know what's going on. 387 00:23:31,883 --> 00:23:34,220 Surinder, couldn't I just pop in... Please, Surinder! 388 00:23:34,492 --> 00:23:37,670 He's going to blow the gaff on the surprise party I've arranged for Paul! 389 00:23:37,899 --> 00:23:41,015 - Oh, I'd love to come to that. - Look, I'm sorry, Estelle, 390 00:23:41,174 --> 00:23:43,277 but bursting in on a doctor and patient is against the rule! 391 00:23:43,479 --> 00:23:45,029 I came as soon as I could. 392 00:23:45,189 --> 00:23:46,919 - Excuse me, do you mind? - What's the matter? 393 00:23:47,132 --> 00:23:48,085 Estelle... 394 00:23:48,229 --> 00:23:49,918 Paul is an alcoholic. 395 00:23:50,210 --> 00:23:53,935 He's been in denial for years, but today he turned up at my AA meeting. 396 00:23:54,100 --> 00:23:55,522 - What? - It would explain a lot. 397 00:23:55,756 --> 00:23:57,572 - Don't be absurd. - Yes, of course. 398 00:23:57,763 --> 00:24:00,679 We heard him. We heard his pain, we heard his confusion. 399 00:24:00,812 --> 00:24:03,150 We didn't reach out to him, but I think we need to reach out to him 400 00:24:03,288 --> 00:24:04,806 and ask him how he feels. 401 00:24:05,003 --> 00:24:06,286 You're Peter, aren't you? 402 00:24:06,723 --> 00:24:10,089 Ronnie Pilfrey. We met in rehab. 403 00:24:12,308 --> 00:24:13,517 Ronnie! 404 00:24:16,533 --> 00:24:17,688 Look, Steve... 405 00:24:18,577 --> 00:24:22,006 - I know about Peter Mailer. - Peter Mailer. 406 00:24:22,597 --> 00:24:23,907 Is he one of our number? 407 00:24:25,797 --> 00:24:27,246 What number? 408 00:24:28,353 --> 00:24:30,004 There's quite a few blokes involved. 409 00:24:30,260 --> 00:24:31,591 From over the years. 410 00:24:32,400 --> 00:24:36,068 - My God! - Paul, what'd you expect? 411 00:24:36,314 --> 00:24:38,300 You don't say no to Estelle. 412 00:24:40,227 --> 00:24:41,473 But who are they? 413 00:24:41,692 --> 00:24:44,887 Well... there's a friend of Nobby's, Buster, 414 00:24:45,223 --> 00:24:46,613 Leslie Frimm, 415 00:24:46,915 --> 00:24:48,439 George Henry McAffey, obviously. 416 00:24:48,662 --> 00:24:50,052 Obviously! 417 00:24:50,201 --> 00:24:51,175 Cyril de Tourner, 418 00:24:51,357 --> 00:24:53,502 the mate of Clive's with the obvious rug, 419 00:24:54,274 --> 00:24:55,707 Ron MacIntyre, 420 00:24:55,893 --> 00:24:57,565 the Grudzinski twins. 421 00:24:57,895 --> 00:24:59,284 Ted Beacham, 422 00:24:59,551 --> 00:25:01,180 Jonathan Kellerman, I suppose. 423 00:25:02,586 --> 00:25:03,794 It's a ring! 424 00:25:04,124 --> 00:25:07,415 Paul is many things, he's very bad at expressing his feelings, 425 00:25:07,570 --> 00:25:10,467 he gets ridiculously paranoid at times, I know, but this... 426 00:25:10,626 --> 00:25:14,789 Estelle, he came to the meeting. He came to Alcoholics Anonymous. 427 00:25:14,992 --> 00:25:17,366 Which is great! He's getting there. 428 00:25:17,510 --> 00:25:21,550 He spoke very movingly and eloquently about his drinking problem. 429 00:25:21,769 --> 00:25:24,562 He is trying to confront it but he's not through it yet. 430 00:25:24,732 --> 00:25:26,074 Not by a long chalk. 431 00:25:26,858 --> 00:25:30,188 He is close to mental collapse. 432 00:25:32,638 --> 00:25:34,161 I'm glad you told me this, Steve. 433 00:25:34,433 --> 00:25:35,960 At least you're not one of them. 434 00:25:36,190 --> 00:25:38,585 Christ, Paul, I was one of the first! 435 00:25:38,809 --> 00:25:40,630 Well, me and Jeff Shaw. 436 00:25:41,428 --> 00:25:44,151 Jesus! Jeff Shaw?! 437 00:25:45,168 --> 00:25:49,123 He's Edwin's godfather! And you, supposedly, are one of my best friends! 438 00:25:49,284 --> 00:25:50,454 That's the point, isn't it? 439 00:25:50,679 --> 00:25:53,203 Jeff's around at your place right now, setting things up with Edwin. 440 00:25:54,160 --> 00:25:55,688 And you come to me? 441 00:25:55,907 --> 00:25:57,510 Talking about earwax?! 442 00:25:59,725 --> 00:26:01,567 Well, you can tell Mr Shaw 443 00:26:01,812 --> 00:26:03,511 that I'm on my way over there right now 444 00:26:03,660 --> 00:26:06,524 and he'd better be wearing protective clothing when I arrive! 445 00:26:08,893 --> 00:26:12,900 - My husband is 100% sane... - He's a wounded animal, Estelle. 446 00:26:13,053 --> 00:26:14,545 He's completely normal! 447 00:26:17,621 --> 00:26:19,729 How could you? 448 00:26:20,283 --> 00:26:22,244 My God, Jeff Shaw? 449 00:26:22,786 --> 00:26:24,175 Leslie Frimm? 450 00:26:24,585 --> 00:26:27,732 The Grudzinski twins? I mean, Jesus Christ! 451 00:26:27,918 --> 00:26:29,143 No, no, no! 452 00:26:29,425 --> 00:26:31,522 I was prepared to give you the benefit of the doubt. 453 00:26:31,821 --> 00:26:35,026 You're obviously half-seas over most of the time anyways, so fair enough. 454 00:26:35,302 --> 00:26:38,544 Paul. Let's be calm and talk. 455 00:26:39,433 --> 00:26:41,984 I think it's a little too late for talk, wouldn't you say? 456 00:26:42,155 --> 00:26:43,497 Paul, what is wrong with you? 457 00:26:43,917 --> 00:26:47,448 And involving the children, Estelle, that is the lowest trick of all. 458 00:26:48,251 --> 00:26:49,907 Let me tell you that I'm going home right now, 459 00:26:50,057 --> 00:26:51,819 and I'm gonna punch Jeff Shaw on the nose! 460 00:26:51,968 --> 00:26:53,895 I just don't know how you could do this to me. 461 00:26:54,119 --> 00:26:55,919 That mate of Clive's with the obvious rug? 462 00:26:56,068 --> 00:26:57,159 Have you got no taste at all? 463 00:26:57,308 --> 00:26:58,955 I thought you liked him, that's the whole point! 464 00:26:59,103 --> 00:27:01,153 I can't stand him myself, actually. 465 00:27:02,308 --> 00:27:03,725 You are sick. 466 00:27:04,554 --> 00:27:06,295 Paul! Paul! 467 00:27:08,313 --> 00:27:11,503 This is entirely typical behaviour. 468 00:27:11,710 --> 00:27:14,581 What? Becoming hysterical because I organised a party for him? 469 00:27:14,756 --> 00:27:15,693 Of course! 470 00:27:15,858 --> 00:27:17,514 His self-esteem is so low 471 00:27:17,711 --> 00:27:21,876 that he sees anything with him at the centre of it as a threat. 472 00:27:22,036 --> 00:27:24,523 I did notice he quite often had a pint at lunchtime. 473 00:27:25,231 --> 00:27:27,184 You know, that's the first indication. 474 00:27:27,361 --> 00:27:30,902 And he said to me last Christmas they intended to get lagged up! 475 00:27:31,063 --> 00:27:33,389 Better follow him before he becames really dangerous. 476 00:27:37,351 --> 00:27:39,321 Did you say your son was with Jeff? 477 00:27:39,497 --> 00:27:41,541 Paul is not a violent man! 478 00:27:41,760 --> 00:27:43,708 You have to face the truth, Estelle. 479 00:27:45,253 --> 00:27:47,074 My husband's an alcoholic. 480 00:27:54,724 --> 00:27:56,385 Is that guy really my dad? 481 00:27:57,023 --> 00:27:59,671 He had long hair till the Berlin Wall came down. 482 00:28:00,500 --> 00:28:02,344 I don't know if the two events are connected. 483 00:28:04,410 --> 00:28:06,034 - So, Rory gets him back here... - Edwin? 484 00:28:06,187 --> 00:28:08,536 Jeff, are you there? Jeff, it's Estelle. 485 00:28:08,669 --> 00:28:10,654 It's about Paul, we're extremely worried about him. 486 00:28:10,799 --> 00:28:12,118 Can you pick up if you're there, please? 487 00:28:12,322 --> 00:28:13,877 Jeff? It's Peter. 488 00:28:14,062 --> 00:28:16,155 Paul is an alcoholic! 489 00:28:16,411 --> 00:28:18,738 He's also deeply disturbed and in denial! 490 00:28:18,934 --> 00:28:20,437 He somehow found out about tonight. 491 00:28:20,671 --> 00:28:22,327 And finds it a threat! 492 00:28:23,083 --> 00:28:23,924 Hello? 493 00:28:24,595 --> 00:28:26,974 Hi, you don't know me, but I work with Paul. 494 00:28:27,119 --> 00:28:29,689 We're all really worried and wondering what to do. 495 00:28:30,478 --> 00:28:32,943 Jeff, Jeff, hi. My name is Ronnie Pilfrey. 496 00:28:33,114 --> 00:28:35,255 He may be in alcoholic psychosis. 497 00:28:35,424 --> 00:28:37,630 I thought I detected traces of Fuhrmann syndrome. 498 00:28:37,778 --> 00:28:39,701 - I am a qualified doctor. - Just. 499 00:28:39,882 --> 00:28:40,984 I'm here for him, Jeff. 500 00:28:41,181 --> 00:28:43,236 And for you, too, should you need me. 501 00:28:44,376 --> 00:28:47,980 Apparently, the thing to do is not to make any specific references to the reunion, 502 00:28:48,133 --> 00:28:49,466 he finds it very upsetting. 503 00:28:50,093 --> 00:28:52,032 Try and get him to call me! 504 00:28:52,180 --> 00:28:53,688 Actually, I think it's me he should call. 505 00:28:54,300 --> 00:28:56,115 Try and get him to explore his feelings! 506 00:28:56,249 --> 00:28:57,564 It's his feelings we're interested in. 507 00:28:57,723 --> 00:28:59,646 He feels confused, betrayed, lost, 508 00:28:59,806 --> 00:29:03,298 and this party is some kind of a metaphore for his aloneness. 509 00:29:03,506 --> 00:29:04,895 You think he may be dangerous? 510 00:29:05,439 --> 00:29:07,776 Yes. I certainly do. 511 00:29:07,984 --> 00:29:09,341 I won't do anything to offend him. 512 00:29:09,954 --> 00:29:11,408 You know, it's funny, I feel... 513 00:29:12,600 --> 00:29:15,444 ridiculously guilty about pulling the wool over his eyes. 514 00:29:15,445 --> 00:29:17,334 He's always been so easy to con. 515 00:29:21,465 --> 00:29:25,874 - A new fan belt, you say? - Oh my God, he's there, isn't he? 516 00:29:26,614 --> 00:29:29,212 - Stay calm, Jeff! - I'll have to think about that. 517 00:29:29,392 --> 00:29:30,974 - Stay calm! - Thanks. 518 00:29:34,169 --> 00:29:35,635 Paul. Hi. 519 00:29:36,305 --> 00:29:38,413 I didn't realise you were in the house. 520 00:29:39,180 --> 00:29:40,453 Crept up on me. 521 00:29:41,044 --> 00:29:45,038 By which I mean there's no reason you shouldn't be in the house. 522 00:29:45,714 --> 00:29:47,653 It is your house, for God's sake! 523 00:29:51,407 --> 00:29:52,589 Paul? 524 00:29:53,259 --> 00:29:54,462 How are you feeling? 525 00:29:56,996 --> 00:29:59,122 I'm fine. Absolutely fine. 526 00:30:00,176 --> 00:30:01,550 I know all about it, you know. 527 00:30:05,228 --> 00:30:07,361 I... know you know. 528 00:30:07,743 --> 00:30:10,937 And I'm glad, in a way, you know. 529 00:30:11,697 --> 00:30:14,967 And I'm glad that you know... I know. 530 00:30:15,170 --> 00:30:17,024 I mean, Jesus, Jeff! 531 00:30:17,625 --> 00:30:19,877 That mate of Clive's with the obvious rug?! 532 00:30:20,468 --> 00:30:22,162 Jesus. 533 00:30:22,720 --> 00:30:25,409 Why don't we sit down and talk about it, eh? 534 00:30:27,449 --> 00:30:29,061 Paul, are you sure you need that? 535 00:30:30,750 --> 00:30:34,083 If ever a situation called for getting blind-drunk, 536 00:30:34,226 --> 00:30:36,836 I would say that this was it. Wouldn't you, Jeff? Honestly? 537 00:30:37,096 --> 00:30:38,667 I'm afraid I wouldn't. 538 00:30:38,918 --> 00:30:41,553 - It's only a question... - Oh, what's the point? 539 00:30:44,374 --> 00:30:46,757 It's Sue Drake all over again. 540 00:30:48,321 --> 00:30:49,691 Will it never end? 541 00:30:51,803 --> 00:30:53,720 Paul, listen... 542 00:30:54,273 --> 00:30:55,310 Paul! 543 00:30:55,828 --> 00:30:57,516 Wait a minute, listen to me... 544 00:30:59,054 --> 00:31:01,258 - Hi, dad. - Hi. 545 00:31:03,544 --> 00:31:06,468 Dad, you're young. It's so weird. 546 00:31:07,767 --> 00:31:10,274 Indeed. The good old days. 547 00:31:11,095 --> 00:31:13,363 I'm afraid things have rather changed since then. 548 00:31:13,773 --> 00:31:15,099 Indeed. 549 00:31:17,075 --> 00:31:19,055 Edwin, Woj, I think you should leave. 550 00:31:19,285 --> 00:31:20,127 Why? 551 00:31:20,397 --> 00:31:23,930 Oh, do you two wanna... kinda... hug and stuff? 552 00:31:24,160 --> 00:31:26,290 It wasn't precisely what I had in mind. 553 00:31:27,647 --> 00:31:30,561 - We were just looking at the videos because... - He knows, Woj. 554 00:31:32,996 --> 00:31:34,134 Shame. 555 00:31:34,422 --> 00:31:36,494 I don't think the young people should be forced to watch this, do you? 556 00:31:36,637 --> 00:31:38,585 No, it's cool! We really like it. 557 00:31:38,767 --> 00:31:40,230 The Grudzinski twins are wicked. 558 00:31:40,407 --> 00:31:42,644 There's that really funny bit with the baguette. 559 00:31:42,819 --> 00:31:45,817 I don't mean this, I mean... Edwin, Woj, just go. 560 00:31:47,781 --> 00:31:49,986 - I don't see why a surprise... - Edwin, please. 561 00:32:07,063 --> 00:32:08,937 I think I know how you must be feeling. 562 00:32:10,007 --> 00:32:13,936 Jeff, you don't have any idea how I'm feeling. 563 00:32:14,073 --> 00:32:15,857 You have no conception. 564 00:32:16,539 --> 00:32:18,553 I can try, Paul. 565 00:32:19,139 --> 00:32:21,082 I can try to understand how you feel. 566 00:32:23,309 --> 00:32:25,396 Hi, hello, hi, hi. 567 00:32:26,695 --> 00:32:29,310 Hello, hi, everyone. 568 00:32:29,613 --> 00:32:33,452 This is Daniel Slippery from Elucidate Management Consultancy. 569 00:32:33,671 --> 00:32:35,194 He's prepared a plan for us. 570 00:32:35,529 --> 00:32:37,212 - Dan. - Thanks, Harry. 571 00:32:37,968 --> 00:32:42,616 Modern charities are tough, money orientated institutions. 572 00:32:42,841 --> 00:32:47,471 And we at Elucidate feel that a heritage of caring 573 00:32:47,682 --> 00:32:50,598 is no substitute for the bottom line. 574 00:32:50,891 --> 00:32:54,947 Now, the biggest asset of any company walks through the door in the morning. 575 00:32:56,347 --> 00:32:57,321 It's you! 576 00:32:57,578 --> 00:33:00,224 But you're also the biggest overhead. 577 00:33:00,995 --> 00:33:02,589 Rory has a question. 578 00:33:02,807 --> 00:33:05,970 Yes. How long are we gonna have to listen to this bollocks? 579 00:33:08,836 --> 00:33:11,541 I've prepared a plan which details the staff to be lost. 580 00:33:12,675 --> 00:33:14,996 At the end of the meeting I'm gonna read it to you. 581 00:33:15,236 --> 00:33:16,912 And then we're gonna club you to death. 582 00:33:21,621 --> 00:33:22,846 Wait a second. 583 00:33:23,267 --> 00:33:24,353 You're saying... 584 00:33:24,800 --> 00:33:27,092 You're saying that you all knew about each other? 585 00:33:27,416 --> 00:33:29,020 Yeah, absolutely. 586 00:33:29,413 --> 00:33:30,410 Well, I mean... 587 00:33:30,713 --> 00:33:32,354 Estelle was obviously... 588 00:33:33,185 --> 00:33:34,239 you know... 589 00:33:34,584 --> 00:33:35,634 in the middle. 590 00:33:36,198 --> 00:33:37,529 Pulling our strings, so to speak. 591 00:33:40,176 --> 00:33:42,449 But how can you sit in my house 592 00:33:42,758 --> 00:33:45,010 and look me in the eye and tell me these things? 593 00:33:45,441 --> 00:33:47,039 It's only a bit of fun, Paul. 594 00:33:48,184 --> 00:33:51,000 I can remember one hilarious night, 595 00:33:51,245 --> 00:33:53,274 when some of us were upstairs in your bedroom, 596 00:33:53,465 --> 00:33:54,903 and you were downstairs, 597 00:33:55,105 --> 00:33:56,304 and we thought you'd rump us. 598 00:33:56,485 --> 00:33:58,678 And that mate of Clive's with the obvious rug, 599 00:33:58,902 --> 00:34:00,696 said to Nobby's friend... 600 00:34:04,621 --> 00:34:05,952 I'm really sorry. 601 00:34:06,586 --> 00:34:09,333 I can see you're finding this upsetting. 602 00:34:10,621 --> 00:34:11,851 Just a little. 603 00:34:12,304 --> 00:34:14,971 I mean, involving Edwin, for God's sake? 604 00:34:15,163 --> 00:34:17,901 Edwin's been crucial! He's been getting the videos of all of us. 605 00:34:18,946 --> 00:34:20,884 - Rory... - Oh, no, no, no, no! 606 00:34:21,187 --> 00:34:22,082 No, no, no, no! 607 00:34:22,279 --> 00:34:26,577 No! I know my oldest son better than anyone else in the world, 608 00:34:26,742 --> 00:34:31,101 and if you think that he'd been happy to be dragged into this perverted scheme, 609 00:34:31,330 --> 00:34:32,943 then you've got another thing coming! 610 00:34:33,141 --> 00:34:34,681 Paul, it was only a few tapes! 611 00:34:40,781 --> 00:34:42,239 Paul, come on. 612 00:34:42,468 --> 00:34:43,645 Tell me what you're feeling. 613 00:34:44,484 --> 00:34:46,089 Get out of my house! 614 00:34:46,569 --> 00:34:47,578 Go on, get out! 615 00:34:47,889 --> 00:34:49,118 Out! 616 00:34:50,192 --> 00:34:51,434 You need help! 617 00:35:05,896 --> 00:35:09,597 Well, my name's Paul Slippery 618 00:35:12,670 --> 00:35:15,920 And I work for the National Health 619 00:35:21,309 --> 00:35:25,042 Well, my name is Paul Slippery... 620 00:35:28,603 --> 00:35:31,506 ...National Health. 621 00:35:37,989 --> 00:35:40,726 ....betrayed me 622 00:35:41,904 --> 00:35:47,116 And my family left me on the shelf. 623 00:35:59,627 --> 00:36:01,155 - Surinder, hi! - Hi. 624 00:36:01,363 --> 00:36:02,391 Come in. 625 00:36:05,048 --> 00:36:07,732 Paul, I'm really worried about you. Are you okay? 626 00:36:08,877 --> 00:36:10,102 Not okay. 627 00:36:10,469 --> 00:36:11,566 Not okay. 628 00:36:14,293 --> 00:36:16,635 Come on, sit up, Paul, sit up! 629 00:36:17,929 --> 00:36:19,756 You're so sweet, Surinder. 630 00:36:21,358 --> 00:36:24,186 You're so kind and gentle, 631 00:36:24,947 --> 00:36:27,152 and sweet and intelligent, 632 00:36:27,461 --> 00:36:30,730 and... medically qualified. 633 00:36:31,172 --> 00:36:34,058 And... brown. 634 00:36:35,272 --> 00:36:37,726 No, don't laugh, Surinder. 635 00:36:39,546 --> 00:36:41,859 You were always the girl I wanted. 636 00:36:43,083 --> 00:36:48,402 You were the one I wanted all those years and months and weeks... 637 00:36:48,403 --> 00:36:49,852 and things. 638 00:36:51,652 --> 00:36:53,483 Sleep with me, please. 639 00:36:59,042 --> 00:37:00,310 No. 640 00:37:01,496 --> 00:37:02,865 Okay. 641 00:37:04,357 --> 00:37:06,059 Would you call me a minicab? 642 00:37:07,034 --> 00:37:08,791 Just how good a begger are you? 643 00:37:09,052 --> 00:37:11,395 Do you use bandages? Have you got a dog? 644 00:37:11,597 --> 00:37:13,886 And is it the right dog? 645 00:37:17,745 --> 00:37:18,623 Dad? 646 00:37:18,863 --> 00:37:20,051 Darling, it's Estelle here. 647 00:37:20,305 --> 00:37:22,931 Your father has an extremely serious drinking problem, 648 00:37:23,086 --> 00:37:24,331 he's on his way over to talk to you... 649 00:37:24,550 --> 00:37:27,159 He's extremely dangerous, Rory! It's Peter here. 650 00:37:27,361 --> 00:37:28,863 He's in urgent need of therapy! 651 00:37:29,017 --> 00:37:31,498 I told you, I can't talk about this, bloody Daniel's about to fire me! 652 00:37:41,724 --> 00:37:44,807 Mum, I told you, I'm in the middle of an important meeting, I can't... 653 00:37:44,977 --> 00:37:47,176 Rory, you don't seem to got hold of this. 654 00:37:47,347 --> 00:37:49,407 Your father is extremely dangerous. 655 00:37:49,567 --> 00:37:51,297 To himself and others! 656 00:37:51,457 --> 00:37:53,192 Get out of there while you have the chance! 657 00:37:53,347 --> 00:37:54,913 He's full of rage and despair! 658 00:37:55,051 --> 00:37:57,128 - Jesus, he's here. - Get out of there, Rory. 659 00:37:57,288 --> 00:37:58,337 Get out now! 660 00:37:58,858 --> 00:38:00,807 - Hey! - Excuse me! 661 00:38:01,009 --> 00:38:02,405 No, it's all right, I'll handle it. 662 00:38:04,626 --> 00:38:05,493 Sit down! 663 00:38:07,744 --> 00:38:08,814 So... 664 00:38:09,203 --> 00:38:10,667 So that that's... 665 00:38:11,370 --> 00:38:13,298 Let's get to the main event, this is... 666 00:38:14,522 --> 00:38:17,469 my redundancy plan for Side Street. 667 00:38:17,810 --> 00:38:18,795 Redundancy? 668 00:38:19,029 --> 00:38:20,888 Good idea. Cut out the deadwood. 669 00:38:21,607 --> 00:38:24,162 No, don't! Don't cut out the deadwood. You've gotta save wood. 670 00:38:24,327 --> 00:38:25,829 Wood doesn't grow on trees, you know? 671 00:38:26,138 --> 00:38:27,171 Shut up. 672 00:38:27,373 --> 00:38:31,749 I've analysed the books and I've studied your working practices. 673 00:38:32,421 --> 00:38:37,616 And I've concluded that only one person is surplus to requirement. 674 00:38:38,515 --> 00:38:41,117 And that's your managing director, Harry Green. 675 00:38:41,522 --> 00:38:43,173 - What? - He pays himself too much. 676 00:38:43,333 --> 00:38:47,677 In the three weeks he's been here, he's claimed 19 taxi fares, 677 00:38:47,890 --> 00:38:51,705 and 15 lunches. What's wrong with the bus, Harry? 678 00:38:51,893 --> 00:38:53,617 Ever heard of a sandwich? 679 00:38:55,114 --> 00:38:59,151 Guys, look, I'm an MD. I don't do buses. 680 00:39:00,573 --> 00:39:01,888 And the rest of you, 681 00:39:02,132 --> 00:39:07,007 including my hardworking brother over there, 682 00:39:07,262 --> 00:39:08,785 you're the beating heart of this concern. 683 00:39:09,014 --> 00:39:10,355 All power to you. 684 00:39:19,756 --> 00:39:20,826 Why am I clapping? 685 00:39:26,312 --> 00:39:27,861 God, it was scary. 686 00:39:28,175 --> 00:39:30,039 I had to go down to the pub to recover. 687 00:39:30,497 --> 00:39:31,647 No offence. 688 00:39:32,046 --> 00:39:33,500 Rory's turned his mobile off. 689 00:39:34,788 --> 00:39:38,083 Paul is now convincing his sons that it was us and not him 690 00:39:38,226 --> 00:39:40,649 who is in serious need of medical help. 691 00:39:41,330 --> 00:39:44,639 That is entirely typical behaviour. 692 00:39:44,932 --> 00:39:45,996 Maybe he's right! 693 00:39:47,253 --> 00:39:48,318 There you are, you see. 694 00:39:48,946 --> 00:39:52,251 Alcoholics are notoriously plausible and cunning. 695 00:39:53,039 --> 00:39:54,577 Yeah, we noticed. 696 00:39:58,044 --> 00:40:01,185 - Who are you? - I'm Woj. I'm not an alcoholic. 697 00:40:01,979 --> 00:40:04,752 Peter, you're an expert in all this. 698 00:40:04,950 --> 00:40:07,005 Do you think Paul continue chucking stuff about? 699 00:40:07,250 --> 00:40:08,608 It's very hard to say, Estelle. 700 00:40:09,337 --> 00:40:12,034 It's very hard to say anything really. 701 00:40:12,960 --> 00:40:16,156 I mean, I seem perfectly normal and sane to you, Edwin... 702 00:40:16,326 --> 00:40:17,551 Count me out of this. 703 00:40:17,865 --> 00:40:20,076 ...or to you, say, Woj... 704 00:40:20,294 --> 00:40:21,582 I'm with him. 705 00:40:22,157 --> 00:40:23,840 I've been waiting for you to say that! 706 00:40:24,435 --> 00:40:28,398 But actually, inside, 707 00:40:28,861 --> 00:40:31,012 there's this little man screaming: 708 00:40:31,172 --> 00:40:32,403 "Go on!" 709 00:40:32,557 --> 00:40:35,363 "Peter, go on! Have a gin and tonic!" 710 00:40:36,221 --> 00:40:39,000 "And a large Jameson's on the rocks!" 711 00:40:41,226 --> 00:40:43,832 Sorry, inside where? 712 00:40:45,962 --> 00:40:47,063 Inside me. 713 00:40:49,780 --> 00:40:51,159 Oh, God. 714 00:41:07,924 --> 00:41:09,340 Thanks for this. 715 00:41:12,838 --> 00:41:15,383 Look, whatever Estelle's told you, 716 00:41:16,049 --> 00:41:17,736 and that is entirely her affair, 717 00:41:18,445 --> 00:41:20,932 I just don't want to get into a slaying match. 718 00:41:21,949 --> 00:41:23,477 What matters to me 719 00:41:23,823 --> 00:41:26,400 is that my relationship with you guys is... 720 00:41:27,571 --> 00:41:28,450 you know... 721 00:41:28,892 --> 00:41:30,243 unchanged. 722 00:41:30,771 --> 00:41:33,701 By the... the things that are going on. 723 00:41:35,943 --> 00:41:38,040 What things are going on? 724 00:41:38,424 --> 00:41:39,579 I don't want to get into that. 725 00:41:39,792 --> 00:41:42,416 Neither do I, but as far as I'm concerned, nothing's going on. 726 00:41:42,560 --> 00:41:46,222 - Anything going on, Daniel? - Uhm, not as far as I'm aware. 727 00:41:48,342 --> 00:41:50,354 Estelle does think you're an alcoholic. 728 00:41:50,668 --> 00:41:52,111 Then she doesn't know me. 729 00:41:53,623 --> 00:41:56,008 Peter Mailer thinks you're an alcoholic. 730 00:41:56,343 --> 00:41:58,425 Peter Mailer thinks everyone is an alcoholic. 731 00:41:58,617 --> 00:41:59,942 Dad, you are pissed! 732 00:42:03,217 --> 00:42:05,636 Text message from Reykjavík! Beat that! 733 00:42:05,796 --> 00:42:08,884 Dan, you're my brother, and I love you, but we don't want to beat that. 734 00:42:09,278 --> 00:42:10,247 Okay. 735 00:42:11,706 --> 00:42:14,215 Well, I think I should be going home now. 736 00:42:16,775 --> 00:42:20,969 I'd very much like it if you two chaps would come with me. 737 00:42:21,869 --> 00:42:24,495 Cause you... are good men. 738 00:42:24,995 --> 00:42:27,694 Decent, God fearing men. 739 00:42:28,126 --> 00:42:30,735 And I know that you wouldn't lie to me. 740 00:42:31,890 --> 00:42:33,732 Not about anything major, anyway. 741 00:42:37,876 --> 00:42:40,866 Well, I think we should have, like, beanbags. 742 00:42:41,085 --> 00:42:42,496 Yeah, and joss sticks. 743 00:42:43,291 --> 00:42:48,032 Trouble is I've got no idea what a men's consciousness raising session looks like! 744 00:42:48,233 --> 00:42:51,885 The only way I've ever raised my consciousness is by shagging complete strangers! 745 00:42:52,806 --> 00:42:55,754 I don't know if we should be having this, it might be too much of a shock for him. 746 00:42:56,829 --> 00:42:58,651 Estelle! Estelle! 747 00:42:59,396 --> 00:43:02,442 Rory called. Paul's sober now. 748 00:43:02,745 --> 00:43:05,530 It's gonna be hard, but we'll all help. 749 00:43:05,701 --> 00:43:07,709 We'll all give him love. 750 00:43:09,839 --> 00:43:11,255 Thank you very much, Peter. 751 00:43:13,140 --> 00:43:15,888 My second wife organised a surprise party for me. 752 00:43:16,090 --> 00:43:19,542 Throughout it I had the strong delusion that I'd arranged it. 753 00:43:19,755 --> 00:43:20,917 It broke up the marriage. 754 00:43:22,077 --> 00:43:25,301 There's a guy hanging around outside who looks like a flasher. 755 00:43:25,727 --> 00:43:27,245 Cyril de Tourner. 756 00:43:27,580 --> 00:43:29,561 He is always early. 757 00:43:31,483 --> 00:43:33,968 I think it's really great that you're coming to this men's group, Daniel. 758 00:43:34,132 --> 00:43:36,419 - My pleasure. - Although he is unreachable. 759 00:43:36,584 --> 00:43:40,024 I'm so not unreachable! I'm a really nice, decent, 760 00:43:40,157 --> 00:43:44,326 honest, sincere man, who tries to respect my bitch. 761 00:43:45,002 --> 00:43:46,951 You know, I've had the most terrible day. 762 00:43:47,164 --> 00:43:49,520 And yet, I feel okay. 763 00:43:49,786 --> 00:43:51,256 Because you guys are with me. 764 00:43:51,442 --> 00:43:53,833 And you're not gonna spring any surprises on me. 765 00:43:55,072 --> 00:43:57,457 But I really want to hear about Lucy and Laura. 766 00:43:57,601 --> 00:44:00,007 I want us to... to really talk, you know? 767 00:44:00,236 --> 00:44:03,000 Honestly and openly as male... 768 00:44:04,012 --> 00:44:04,960 men. 769 00:44:07,372 --> 00:44:09,219 Edwin, darling, stop picking! 770 00:44:13,324 --> 00:44:14,150 Hello. 771 00:44:14,751 --> 00:44:17,375 Excuse me, everybody, Paul's gonna be here in 3 minutes, 772 00:44:17,514 --> 00:44:19,672 I want you to sit down and look sensitive. 773 00:44:22,973 --> 00:44:24,427 Estelle? It's Gwendolen. 774 00:44:24,672 --> 00:44:26,615 Don't ever do that to me again! 775 00:44:26,807 --> 00:44:28,820 We're coming to some sort of crisis, you and I. 776 00:44:29,533 --> 00:44:31,924 Why the hell weren't you at the presentation? 777 00:44:32,084 --> 00:44:34,263 You need to decide what you want, Estelle, 778 00:44:34,401 --> 00:44:35,812 and not in my time... 779 00:44:38,074 --> 00:44:42,273 And Steve pulled her! Right? He got her in the back of the old Mondeo! He gave her one! 780 00:44:43,834 --> 00:44:46,240 Very funny. Now, everyone, let's get on with this. Sit down, please. 781 00:44:46,559 --> 00:44:47,556 Sit down. 782 00:44:54,850 --> 00:44:55,776 Right. 783 00:44:56,122 --> 00:44:59,070 You look completely unreconstructed. You're meant to be new men! 784 00:44:59,310 --> 00:45:01,968 Raising your levels of consciousness, talking about your feelings! 785 00:45:02,112 --> 00:45:03,363 - And farting. - And farting. 786 00:45:03,608 --> 00:45:04,940 - Yes. - Listen to the boss. 787 00:45:06,649 --> 00:45:09,904 When he comes in, I want you to look at the floor and then turn suddenly. 788 00:45:11,278 --> 00:45:12,178 Then what? 789 00:45:13,221 --> 00:45:14,478 Then he has a heart attack. 790 00:45:36,482 --> 00:45:39,518 Right, men... let's raise some consciousness. 791 00:45:46,274 --> 00:45:48,106 - Hi, Paul! - Hello, Paul! 792 00:45:50,076 --> 00:45:54,305 Cyril de Tourner is a really nice bloke. 793 00:45:55,061 --> 00:45:56,775 Cyril de Tourner is a creep. 794 00:45:57,079 --> 00:45:58,767 And Leslie Frimm... 795 00:45:59,155 --> 00:46:01,780 that Joan Baez impression: superb stuff! 796 00:46:03,708 --> 00:46:08,229 You know, I think those Grudzinski twins, I think they're gay. 797 00:46:09,059 --> 00:46:11,690 - Both of them? - Possibly. 798 00:46:12,169 --> 00:46:14,845 Peter Mailer really likes the taste of Coca Cola, he told me. 799 00:46:15,068 --> 00:46:17,119 Peter Mailer is crashingly boring. 800 00:46:21,080 --> 00:46:22,758 I'm really sorry about today. 801 00:46:23,141 --> 00:46:24,222 Don't worry. 802 00:46:24,435 --> 00:46:28,595 It's perfectly normal to think your wife is shagging all your oldest friends. 803 00:46:29,521 --> 00:46:31,219 I just don't know what got into me. 804 00:46:31,528 --> 00:46:32,396 You... 805 00:46:33,195 --> 00:46:34,175 Women. 806 00:46:34,436 --> 00:46:36,501 That is exactly the word I was looking for, you women... 807 00:46:36,661 --> 00:46:39,307 You women are more perceptive in human relations than men. 808 00:46:40,037 --> 00:46:41,618 How did you know I was gonna say that? 809 00:46:41,773 --> 00:46:43,620 You say it three times a week. 810 00:46:43,876 --> 00:46:46,968 In the early '90s you started to say it every day until I told you to stop, 811 00:46:47,117 --> 00:46:49,993 which you did for about a year, and now you gradually phase it back in again. 812 00:46:50,664 --> 00:46:52,608 God, I must be boring to live with. 813 00:46:53,498 --> 00:46:54,712 You are sometimes. 814 00:46:55,281 --> 00:46:58,291 You can remember what I said in 1995, 815 00:46:59,244 --> 00:47:01,589 and I can't even remember when we last had sex. 816 00:47:07,638 --> 00:47:08,735 Can't you? 817 00:47:09,581 --> 00:47:12,948 You don't believe I can't remember when we last had sex. 818 00:47:13,183 --> 00:47:15,510 I don't say I don't believe, 819 00:47:15,664 --> 00:47:17,805 I just don't know whether I believe or not. 820 00:47:18,827 --> 00:47:19,903 I can remember. 821 00:47:20,238 --> 00:47:22,405 I can remember when we had sex once. 822 00:47:23,385 --> 00:47:25,435 It was in a hotel room in France. 823 00:47:26,510 --> 00:47:28,016 It was the afternoon. 824 00:47:29,215 --> 00:47:31,377 It was very hot and we could... 825 00:47:32,293 --> 00:47:34,348 hear kids playing in the square below, 826 00:47:34,545 --> 00:47:36,153 we didn't have any kids back then. 827 00:47:37,751 --> 00:47:41,591 And afterwards we just laid there... 828 00:47:42,222 --> 00:47:43,819 and looked at each other... 829 00:47:44,309 --> 00:47:45,183 We didn't speak. 830 00:47:46,514 --> 00:47:49,261 It was like the whole world had stopped. 831 00:47:51,609 --> 00:47:52,973 Do you remember that?