1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:12,000
Synced and corrected by : Katniss Everdeen
www.addic7ed.com

2
00:00:17,500 --> 00:00:18,751
[Laughing]

3
00:00:18,753 --> 00:00:19,952
I'll go get us a table.

4
00:00:19,954 --> 00:00:21,387
Kay-kay.

5
00:00:21,389 --> 00:00:22,721
Hey, you should go with him.

6
00:00:22,723 --> 00:00:23,322
Why?

7
00:00:23,324 --> 00:00:26,125
So you won't be near me.

8
00:00:26,127 --> 00:00:29,828
Sam, you make such funny jokes.

9
00:00:29,830 --> 00:00:32,898
I'll go with him.

10
00:00:32,900 --> 00:00:34,400
Excuse me!

11
00:00:34,402 --> 00:00:36,201
Excuse me!

12
00:00:36,203 --> 00:00:37,002
Whoa. What?

13
00:00:37,004 --> 00:00:37,836
Hi.

14
00:00:37,838 --> 00:00:39,471
Bots is closed.

15
00:00:39,473 --> 00:00:40,906
This is a private party

16
00:00:40,908 --> 00:00:43,342
for a young boy's birthday.

17
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We know.

18
00:00:43,911 --> 00:00:45,044
We're invited to the party.

19
00:00:45,046 --> 00:00:46,612
We babysit for little Otis.

20
00:00:46,614 --> 00:00:50,516
Yeah, you big bucket o' nuts.

21
00:00:50,518 --> 00:00:52,251
I may be a machine,

22
00:00:52,253 --> 00:00:55,354
but I will live forever,
unlike you humans

23
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who will one day all be dead.

24
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Enjoy the party!

25
00:01:06,067 --> 00:01:06,865
Come on, I'm gonna

26
00:01:06,867 --> 00:01:08,600
go put my present for Otis on the table

27
00:01:08,602 --> 00:01:09,735
with all the other ones.

28
00:01:09,737 --> 00:01:13,839
[Grumbles]

29
00:01:13,841 --> 00:01:14,440
I can't believe

30
00:01:14,442 --> 00:01:16,175
you didn't get Otis a present.

31
00:01:16,177 --> 00:01:18,610
I did. See?

32
00:01:18,612 --> 00:01:20,079
The card says right here,

33
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"from Uncle George... And Sam."

34
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Come on.

35
00:01:33,527 --> 00:01:35,527
Kind of a boring birthday party.

36
00:01:35,529 --> 00:01:36,862
I'll say.

37
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Poor Otis.

38
00:01:38,265 --> 00:01:40,132
Well, wait till Otis sees us.

39
00:01:40,134 --> 00:01:42,367
He loves us.

40
00:01:42,369 --> 00:01:43,469
Oh, there's Otis.

41
00:01:43,471 --> 00:01:44,470
Oh yeah.

42
00:01:44,472 --> 00:01:50,275
Otis. My man.

43
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What was that?

44
00:01:51,479 --> 00:01:52,111
What?

45
00:01:52,113 --> 00:01:54,113
I gave the kid a big friendly "hey"

46
00:01:54,115 --> 00:01:58,550
and all I get is... Well, I don't even

47
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understand this birthday party.

48
00:02:00,321 --> 00:02:01,320
Why aren't the children

49
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talking to each other?

50
00:02:03,357 --> 00:02:06,024
Whoa! Level 44!

51
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I'm on 44!

52
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[Groans]

53
00:02:10,231 --> 00:02:11,230
Oh.

54
00:02:11,232 --> 00:02:12,698
They're playing "Brain Crush."

55
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Oh, of course.

56
00:02:13,701 --> 00:02:14,700
Oh yeah.

57
00:02:14,702 --> 00:02:15,801
What's "Brain Crush"?

58
00:02:15,803 --> 00:02:17,769
You don't know much, do ya?

59
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Dice.

60
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"Brain crush"

61
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is this new game that
every kid on earth

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is playing.

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Not just kids.

64
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Well, how come I've never

65
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heard of "Brain Crush"?

66
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Probably 'cause they
don't write about it

67
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in "Elderly magazine."

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Sam.

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You know, I don't
appreciate your comments

70
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about how elderly
people are not with it.

71
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I'm with it.

72
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Hey, you guys know that

73
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you can use your phone
to take a picture?

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Cheese.

75
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Cheese.

76
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I can't defend you anymore.

77
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Hey, hey, kids! It's me!

78
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Jug-o!

79
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Yay, I love jug-o!

80
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He's juggled for the vice president!

81
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Okay, kids.

82
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You see these three wigs on a stick?

83
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Well, check this out!

84
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Oh!

85
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Oh, wow!

86
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Now watch jug-o go!

87
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Whoa!

88
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Oh my stars, look at
those whirling wigs!

89
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Yeah, but look at the kids.

90
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They're not even watching.

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Nope, 'cause they're all

92
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obsessed with "Brain Crush."

93
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Hey, hey, look at me.

94
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I'm juggling flaming wigs.

95
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See me?

96
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Kids?

97
00:03:42,790 --> 00:03:44,823
Not one kid is even watching him.

98
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This is sad.

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Kids.

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Kids! Hey!

101
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There's a man right there

102
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juggling for your entertainment.

103
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He's worked his whole life for this.

104
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Yeah, give the guy a break.

105
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He probably still lives

106
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with his mother in her basement.

107
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He's probably never dated a woman.

108
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Jug-o can hear you.

109
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All those kids care about

110
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is playing that dumb game.

111
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It's terrible.

112
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Oh, here comes the birthday cake.

113
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That'll get their attention.

114
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♪ Happy happy happy ♪ Happy Birthday

115
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♪ happy happy happy ♪ Happy Birthday

116
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♪ everybody wants to wish you

117
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♪ a Happy Birthday look, kids.

118
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Cake!

119
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Who wants cake?

120
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They don't even want cake.

121
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Oh, come on.

122
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Nobody wants cake?

123
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Let me help you out here.

124
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♪ I'm never that far

125
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♪ no matter where you are ♪ believe it

126
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♪ we can make it come true

127
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♪ we'll do it our way

128
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♪ no matter what they
say ♪ 'cause no one's

129
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♪ gonna do it for you ♪ yeah

130
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♪ but I-I-I-I-I ♪ I'll never say never

131
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♪ as long as ♪ we keep it together

132
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♪ if you're living a dream

133
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♪ and you know what it means

134
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♪ then you can't let them

135
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♪ change your mind

136
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♪ it's the life that we choose

137
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♪ and we still break the rules

138
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♪ but it's all gonna be ♪ just fine

139
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♪ (just fine)

140
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♪ Yeah, we're all gonna be ♪ just fine

141
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♪ you and me ♪ we're gonna be just fine

142
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hey. Hey, Cat?

143
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Yeah?

144
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I'm trying to get a nail

145
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into this door frame here.

146
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Would you grab me a hammer

147
00:05:58,926 --> 00:06:01,293
out of that toolbox?

148
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Hammer.

149
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Hammer.

150
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No hammer in here.

151
00:06:06,200 --> 00:06:07,199
Well, how am I supposed

152
00:06:07,201 --> 00:06:09,207
to pound a nail into the...

153
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Sam!

154
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What?

155
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Don't use your head.

156
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Use this.

157
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I just asked you if
we had one of those.

158
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You asked if we had a hammer.

159
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Well, what do you call that?

160
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A nail banger.

161
00:06:31,291 --> 00:06:34,426
Wait. What's wrong with our
door?
- Well, I got home

162
00:06:34,428 --> 00:06:36,428
and I couldn't find my key

163
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so I kicked the door in.

164
00:06:39,767 --> 00:06:40,966
What's that black coat for?

165
00:06:40,968 --> 00:06:42,300
Oh, it's a part of my costume

166
00:06:42,302 --> 00:06:43,602
for my play tomorrow night.

167
00:06:43,604 --> 00:06:44,436
What play?

168
00:06:44,438 --> 00:06:45,170
I told you.

169
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My one-girl show, "Baberaham Lincoln."

170
00:06:49,410 --> 00:06:50,075
Baberaham?

171
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- "Baberaham Lincoln."
- Baberaham? - Yeah.

172
00:06:50,811 --> 00:06:51,610
Yeah.
All about the life

173
00:06:51,612 --> 00:06:56,448
of Abraham Lincoln were he a lady.

174
00:06:56,450 --> 00:06:58,517
Wow, that sounds so great.

175
00:06:58,519 --> 00:07:00,419
I'm not going.

176
00:07:00,421 --> 00:07:02,320
If you come to my play tomorrow night

177
00:07:02,322 --> 00:07:06,224
I'll pop that thing on your back.

178
00:07:06,226 --> 00:07:07,159
Okay.

179
00:07:07,161 --> 00:07:08,427
Yay!

180
00:07:08,429 --> 00:07:10,729
And gross.

181
00:07:10,731 --> 00:07:12,164
All right, I'll see
you in a little bit.

182
00:07:12,166 --> 00:07:12,898
Where you going?

183
00:07:12,900 --> 00:07:14,399
To Elderly Acres so Nona can help me

184
00:07:14,401 --> 00:07:17,269
finish my costume and do my laundry.

185
00:07:17,271 --> 00:07:19,905
Won't take much soap to wash this.

186
00:07:19,907 --> 00:07:22,340
Put it back.

187
00:07:22,342 --> 00:07:23,275
Hey, if I put my laundry

188
00:07:23,277 --> 00:07:24,176
in a bag and come with you,

189
00:07:24,178 --> 00:07:25,410
will Nona do mine, too?

190
00:07:25,412 --> 00:07:26,178
Yeah.

191
00:07:26,180 --> 00:07:28,146
Even my stinkables?

192
00:07:28,148 --> 00:07:31,183
We don't use that word.

193
00:07:31,185 --> 00:07:31,950
Stankables?

194
00:07:31,952 --> 00:07:35,320
[Gasps]

195
00:07:35,322 --> 00:07:37,522
[Grunts]

196
00:07:37,524 --> 00:07:39,558
What is all that?

197
00:07:39,560 --> 00:07:41,460
My dirty clothes.

198
00:07:41,462 --> 00:07:45,230
When was the last time you did laundry?

199
00:07:45,232 --> 00:07:46,832
When did I move in here?

200
00:07:46,834 --> 00:07:48,166
Ah geez.

201
00:07:48,168 --> 00:07:49,000
Look, instead of judging me,

202
00:07:49,002 --> 00:07:49,668
why don't you come over here

203
00:07:49,670 --> 00:07:54,873
and pick up a bag?

204
00:07:54,875 --> 00:07:56,174
What's wrong with Dice?

205
00:07:56,176 --> 00:07:58,877
I don't know.

206
00:07:58,879 --> 00:07:59,878
Hey man, what's up? Oh.

207
00:07:59,880 --> 00:08:00,612
Yeah.

208
00:08:00,614 --> 00:08:03,248
Yeah, that's great, thanks.

209
00:08:03,250 --> 00:08:04,416
What are you doing?

210
00:08:04,418 --> 00:08:07,853
No, I'm not hungry.

211
00:08:07,855 --> 00:08:09,087
Hey, give it!

212
00:08:09,089 --> 00:08:10,288
"Brain crush"?

213
00:08:10,290 --> 00:08:12,991
Oh my God.

214
00:08:12,993 --> 00:08:13,658
Give me my phone.

215
00:08:13,660 --> 00:08:15,160
I'm almost on level 21!

216
00:08:15,162 --> 00:08:15,727
When did you start

217
00:08:15,729 --> 00:08:16,728
playing this stupid game?

218
00:08:16,730 --> 00:08:18,063
Last night.

219
00:08:18,065 --> 00:08:19,698
You look like you haven't slept.

220
00:08:19,700 --> 00:08:20,232
Why would I sleep

221
00:08:20,234 --> 00:08:21,867
when I can play "Brain Crush"?

222
00:08:21,869 --> 00:08:23,869
Give me my phone!

223
00:08:23,871 --> 00:08:25,470
Yes!

224
00:08:25,472 --> 00:08:26,338
Oh yeah, oh yeah, come on,

225
00:08:26,340 --> 00:08:28,773
crush the brains. Crush 'em. Ha!

226
00:08:28,775 --> 00:08:29,307
Ten more.

227
00:08:29,309 --> 00:08:33,144
Give me more brains to crush.

228
00:08:33,146 --> 00:08:35,213
He's moist.

229
00:08:35,215 --> 00:08:36,548
Why are you all wet?

230
00:08:36,550 --> 00:08:37,682
I think I might've

231
00:08:37,684 --> 00:08:40,318
walked through a car wash.

232
00:08:40,320 --> 00:08:41,586
This game's really fun.

233
00:08:41,588 --> 00:08:42,654
You guys should try it.

234
00:08:42,656 --> 00:08:43,355
I'll try it.

235
00:08:43,357 --> 00:08:44,689
No!

236
00:08:44,691 --> 00:08:45,557
Listen.

237
00:08:45,559 --> 00:08:47,259
People get addicted to that game

238
00:08:47,261 --> 00:08:48,360
and it could happen to you.

239
00:08:48,362 --> 00:08:50,562
Then what?

240
00:08:50,564 --> 00:08:52,697
And then your grades at school

241
00:08:52,699 --> 00:08:54,733
start to go downhill

242
00:08:54,735 --> 00:08:56,668
and then you forget to bathe

243
00:08:56,670 --> 00:08:58,703
and you lose all your friends

244
00:08:58,705 --> 00:08:59,304
and then you can't even

245
00:08:59,306 --> 00:09:02,207
feel anything anymore.

246
00:09:02,209 --> 00:09:04,016
See this?

247
00:09:11,018 --> 00:09:11,950
See?

248
00:09:11,952 --> 00:09:14,819
This game makes you dead in the head.

249
00:09:14,821 --> 00:09:16,121
Poor Dice.

250
00:09:16,123 --> 00:09:18,156
Yeah.

251
00:09:18,158 --> 00:09:19,190
Now, let's go to Elderly Acres

252
00:09:19,192 --> 00:09:21,860
so Nona can do my laundry.

253
00:09:21,862 --> 00:09:22,527
Wait, don't you have

254
00:09:22,529 --> 00:09:23,828
to finish fixing the door first?

255
00:09:23,830 --> 00:09:24,763
Oh yeah.

256
00:09:24,765 --> 00:09:29,568
It'll just take a sec.

257
00:09:29,570 --> 00:09:31,336
Oh, hey, your phone's about to die.

258
00:09:31,338 --> 00:09:33,071
What? My battery!

259
00:09:33,073 --> 00:09:33,772
Give me your charger!

260
00:09:33,774 --> 00:09:35,040
It won't work.

261
00:09:35,042 --> 00:09:35,907
Why not?

262
00:09:35,909 --> 00:09:36,641
'Cause I have a slightly

263
00:09:36,643 --> 00:09:37,876
older phone so my charger

264
00:09:37,878 --> 00:09:39,377
won't work with your phone.

265
00:09:39,379 --> 00:09:40,879
Doh! Why do they do that?

266
00:09:40,881 --> 00:09:43,782
To make us buy more cords.

267
00:09:43,784 --> 00:09:45,817
I got to go. Bye!

268
00:09:45,819 --> 00:09:46,751
No, no, no!

269
00:09:46,753 --> 00:09:48,453
[Screams]

270
00:09:48,455 --> 00:09:50,255
Oh, Sam! Your fingers!

271
00:09:50,257 --> 00:09:51,556
Uh-huh.

272
00:09:51,558 --> 00:09:53,425
They're smushed in the door!

273
00:09:53,427 --> 00:09:55,260
Yes, that's right.

274
00:09:55,262 --> 00:09:58,763
Do you want me to... Open the door?

275
00:09:58,765 --> 00:09:59,998
Yes I do.

276
00:10:00,000 --> 00:10:01,866
Kay-kay.

277
00:10:01,868 --> 00:10:03,944
[Screaming]

278
00:10:12,946 --> 00:10:14,779
Hurry.

279
00:10:14,781 --> 00:10:17,549
But this cart is so heavy.

280
00:10:17,551 --> 00:10:20,085
I don't see why you can't walk.

281
00:10:20,087 --> 00:10:21,286
Look at my hands.

282
00:10:21,288 --> 00:10:22,120
My fingers are crushed

283
00:10:22,122 --> 00:10:23,388
and these bandages you put me in

284
00:10:23,390 --> 00:10:25,824
are the size of cabbages.

285
00:10:25,826 --> 00:10:27,826
Just help me out of
this thing, would you?

286
00:10:27,828 --> 00:10:29,127
All right.

287
00:10:29,129 --> 00:10:31,429
Take my, that's... You're not...

288
00:10:31,431 --> 00:10:35,634
You're not helping me.

289
00:10:35,636 --> 00:10:37,836
Oh God, oh God.

290
00:10:37,838 --> 00:10:39,511
Okay.

291
00:10:46,513 --> 00:10:48,513
All right.

292
00:10:48,515 --> 00:10:49,648
Now, let's find Nona.

293
00:10:49,650 --> 00:10:52,684
Oh my... so many brains to crush.

294
00:10:52,686 --> 00:10:53,985
"Brain crush."

295
00:10:53,987 --> 00:10:55,186
We have to help Nona!

296
00:10:55,188 --> 00:10:57,222
It's too late for Nona!

297
00:10:57,224 --> 00:10:59,924
Well, we've got to to try.

298
00:10:59,926 --> 00:11:01,926
Nona, put that game down!

299
00:11:01,928 --> 00:11:04,396
And do my laundry!

300
00:11:04,398 --> 00:11:05,897
So many brains to crush.

301
00:11:05,899 --> 00:11:06,831
So many brains.

302
00:11:06,833 --> 00:11:08,033
She's lost her mind.

303
00:11:08,035 --> 00:11:12,737
Well, we got to snap her out of it.

304
00:11:12,739 --> 00:11:14,305
This is a really fun game.

305
00:11:14,307 --> 00:11:15,573
You guys should try it.

306
00:11:15,575 --> 00:11:16,474
No!

307
00:11:16,476 --> 00:11:17,976
We need you to play a better game.

308
00:11:17,978 --> 00:11:19,944
It's called "doing our laundry."

309
00:11:19,946 --> 00:11:21,513
I just hit level nine!

310
00:11:21,515 --> 00:11:22,781
[Murmuring]

311
00:11:22,783 --> 00:11:25,250
Level nine.

312
00:11:25,252 --> 00:11:28,053
Oh my God.

313
00:11:28,055 --> 00:11:28,853
We gotta get outta here.

314
00:11:28,855 --> 00:11:30,355
Nona, I need you to help me finish

315
00:11:30,357 --> 00:11:31,356
my Baberaham Lincoln costume.

316
00:11:31,358 --> 00:11:32,090
Please, Nona.

317
00:11:32,092 --> 00:11:34,092
Please help me finish
my Baberaham costume.

318
00:11:34,094 --> 00:11:34,993
What's happening?

319
00:11:34,995 --> 00:11:36,361
What's happening?

320
00:11:36,363 --> 00:11:38,029
What are all these people doing?

321
00:11:38,031 --> 00:11:39,564
What's happening?

322
00:11:39,566 --> 00:11:40,765
Close the doors!

323
00:11:40,767 --> 00:11:42,233
Close the doors!

324
00:11:42,235 --> 00:11:42,867
Lock them!

325
00:11:42,869 --> 00:11:43,535
How?

326
00:11:43,537 --> 00:11:45,403
I don't know! Oh gosh!

327
00:11:45,405 --> 00:11:47,138
Ow!

328
00:11:47,140 --> 00:11:50,475
[Screams]

329
00:11:50,477 --> 00:11:51,843
They've gone insane.

330
00:11:51,845 --> 00:11:53,611
What do we do?

331
00:11:53,613 --> 00:11:55,213
Oh good, a cop!

332
00:11:55,215 --> 00:11:56,014
Sir!

333
00:11:56,016 --> 00:11:57,449
Officer, we need you to do something!

334
00:11:57,451 --> 00:11:58,950
My Nona and all these elderlies

335
00:11:58,952 --> 00:12:00,652
are obsessed with this game

336
00:12:00,654 --> 00:12:01,953
called "Brain Crush."

337
00:12:01,955 --> 00:12:02,721
Have you heard about it?

338
00:12:02,723 --> 00:12:05,690
Yes.

339
00:12:05,692 --> 00:12:07,125
It's a really fun game.

340
00:12:07,127 --> 00:12:08,993
You guys should try it.

341
00:12:08,995 --> 00:12:10,028
[Screams]

342
00:12:10,030 --> 00:12:10,595
Wait!

343
00:12:10,597 --> 00:12:11,129
What?

344
00:12:11,131 --> 00:12:11,896
Get his utility belt!

345
00:12:11,898 --> 00:12:12,464
Why?

346
00:12:12,466 --> 00:12:13,298
It's got cool stuff on it.

347
00:12:13,300 --> 00:12:14,065
Just do it!

348
00:12:14,067 --> 00:12:15,640
Ah!

349
00:12:22,642 --> 00:12:24,075
Cat!

350
00:12:24,077 --> 00:12:26,444
Come change the channel on the TV!

351
00:12:26,446 --> 00:12:27,545
I can't.

352
00:12:27,547 --> 00:12:29,881
I'm putting on my costume!

353
00:12:29,883 --> 00:12:30,648
[SIGHS]

354
00:12:30,650 --> 00:12:33,384
Hey!

355
00:12:33,386 --> 00:12:35,086
Hey!

356
00:12:35,088 --> 00:12:36,588
Ah! Will one of you brain-dead zombies

357
00:12:36,590 --> 00:12:37,722
get off your bat futts

358
00:12:37,724 --> 00:12:40,492
and come change the channel?

359
00:12:40,494 --> 00:12:41,259
Crush the brains.

360
00:12:41,261 --> 00:12:42,560
"Brain crush."

361
00:12:42,562 --> 00:12:43,261
Purple brains.

362
00:12:43,263 --> 00:12:44,529
Want more.

363
00:12:44,531 --> 00:12:45,635
[Grunts]

364
00:12:51,037 --> 00:12:51,803
[Grunts]

365
00:12:51,805 --> 00:12:53,972
No. I wanted to change the channel,

366
00:12:53,974 --> 00:12:58,076
not switch from hdmi
to composite video.

367
00:12:58,078 --> 00:13:07,087
["Hail to the chief" music]

368
00:13:09,689 --> 00:13:12,791
Look. I'm president Lincoln.

369
00:13:12,793 --> 00:13:16,661
Had he been a lady.

370
00:13:16,663 --> 00:13:18,062
What do you think?

371
00:13:18,064 --> 00:13:19,264
You really want to know?

372
00:13:19,266 --> 00:13:21,733
No.

373
00:13:21,735 --> 00:13:22,600
Nona.

374
00:13:22,602 --> 00:13:23,334
Dice.

375
00:13:23,336 --> 00:13:25,770
Let's go.

376
00:13:25,772 --> 00:13:27,005
Hey, look at my costume.

377
00:13:27,007 --> 00:13:33,478
I'm Baberaham... Hey!

378
00:13:33,480 --> 00:13:35,280
How do I get them to leave?

379
00:13:35,282 --> 00:13:37,615
Grab their games and
run away screaming.

380
00:13:37,617 --> 00:13:39,984
Kay-kay.

381
00:13:39,986 --> 00:13:40,819
[Screaming]

382
00:13:40,821 --> 00:13:42,020
Hey! Hey, Cat!

383
00:13:42,022 --> 00:13:44,789
Hey, gimme my phone!

384
00:13:44,791 --> 00:13:45,523
Hey!

385
00:13:45,525 --> 00:13:46,324
Gimme my phone!

386
00:13:46,326 --> 00:13:47,025
Give it back!

387
00:13:47,027 --> 00:13:47,992
Give it back, I say!

388
00:13:47,994 --> 00:13:50,128
Give it back!

389
00:13:50,130 --> 00:13:56,100
I hate everybody.

390
00:13:56,102 --> 00:13:57,635
That's right.

391
00:13:57,637 --> 00:14:00,071
I used to live in a log cabin.

392
00:14:00,073 --> 00:14:01,840
But since I'm a lady,

393
00:14:01,842 --> 00:14:05,476
I painted me log cabin
pink and called it

394
00:14:05,478 --> 00:14:07,751
"Baberaham's cabin of pink logs."

395
00:14:13,753 --> 00:14:14,619
Hey.

396
00:14:14,621 --> 00:14:15,186
Hey.

397
00:14:15,188 --> 00:14:17,188
Why were you in the
bathroom for so long?

398
00:14:17,190 --> 00:14:19,190
'Cause both my hands are bandaged.

399
00:14:19,192 --> 00:14:20,358
So?

400
00:14:26,360 --> 00:14:29,434
There was a monkey in the bathroom?

401
00:14:30,036 --> 00:14:31,169
Yes, Cat.

402
00:14:31,171 --> 00:14:34,339
I was delayed by a
monkey in the bathroom.

403
00:14:34,341 --> 00:14:36,608
I hate it when that happens.

404
00:14:36,610 --> 00:14:41,012
[Yelling]

405
00:14:41,014 --> 00:14:42,380
What's all that racket?

406
00:14:42,382 --> 00:14:45,283
There's a karate studio
next door for kids.

407
00:14:45,285 --> 00:14:46,251
A karate studio?

408
00:14:46,253 --> 00:14:46,718
Yeah.

409
00:14:46,720 --> 00:14:48,853
They call it a "doojoo."

410
00:14:48,855 --> 00:14:50,288
Dojo.

411
00:14:50,290 --> 00:14:51,522
No, my friend says

412
00:14:51,524 --> 00:14:53,024
they're called "doojoos."

413
00:14:53,026 --> 00:14:53,892
What friend?

414
00:14:53,894 --> 00:14:55,126
Jojo. You met him.

415
00:14:55,128 --> 00:14:56,461
Oh yeah, the deejay.

416
00:14:56,463 --> 00:14:57,061
Yeah.

417
00:14:57,063 --> 00:14:58,563
And you're sure that
deejay jojo said that

418
00:14:58,565 --> 00:15:00,798
dojos are called "doojoos?"

419
00:15:00,800 --> 00:15:02,367
[Knocking]

420
00:15:02,369 --> 00:15:03,468
Cat?

421
00:15:03,470 --> 00:15:04,769
Oh, hi!

422
00:15:04,771 --> 00:15:05,770
Everyone's in their seats.

423
00:15:05,772 --> 00:15:06,571
You can start your show

424
00:15:06,573 --> 00:15:07,605
whenever you're ready.

425
00:15:07,607 --> 00:15:08,373
[Squeals]

426
00:15:08,375 --> 00:15:09,073
All right.

427
00:15:09,075 --> 00:15:09,707
How's the audience?

428
00:15:09,709 --> 00:15:10,508
Are they excited?

429
00:15:10,510 --> 00:15:14,913
Why don't you just leave me alone?

430
00:15:14,915 --> 00:15:15,980
All right, kid.

431
00:15:15,982 --> 00:15:17,081
You ready to go out there and put on

432
00:15:17,083 --> 00:15:18,116
your dumb little play?

433
00:15:18,118 --> 00:15:20,652
Yup.

434
00:15:20,654 --> 00:15:22,220
Oh, Sam.

435
00:15:22,222 --> 00:15:22,954
What?

436
00:15:22,956 --> 00:15:26,824
Your pants. The zipper.

437
00:15:26,826 --> 00:15:29,193
How am I gonna work a zipper?

438
00:15:29,195 --> 00:15:35,166
Ask the bathroom monkey.

439
00:15:35,168 --> 00:15:45,877
["Hail to the chief" music]

440
00:15:45,879 --> 00:15:49,414
Well, tiddle me winks.

441
00:15:49,416 --> 00:15:52,083
I am Baberaham Lincoln.

442
00:15:52,085 --> 00:15:53,284
Me goodness, it certainly

443
00:15:53,286 --> 00:15:54,519
is a lovely evening

444
00:15:54,521 --> 00:15:58,056
here tonight in the 1800s.

445
00:15:58,058 --> 00:15:59,924
Why is she doing a British accent?

446
00:15:59,926 --> 00:16:01,926
No idea.

447
00:16:01,928 --> 00:16:04,462
I live in this fine town

448
00:16:04,464 --> 00:16:07,765
called Springfield.

449
00:16:07,767 --> 00:16:09,000
And, yes, I lived here

450
00:16:09,002 --> 00:16:15,573
long before the Simpsons did.

451
00:16:15,575 --> 00:16:19,143
Ha, ha.

452
00:16:19,145 --> 00:16:22,513
So, I built this here cabin

453
00:16:22,515 --> 00:16:24,816
out of logs me self.

454
00:16:24,818 --> 00:16:32,357
And I painted them pink, I did.

455
00:16:32,359 --> 00:16:35,994
[Karate yells]

456
00:16:35,996 --> 00:16:40,064
And every night I would read

457
00:16:40,066 --> 00:16:43,901
me self a book by the fireplace.

458
00:16:43,903 --> 00:16:46,170
Oh gosh!

459
00:16:46,172 --> 00:16:47,772
Too much. Too much.

460
00:16:47,774 --> 00:16:51,476
You guys are missing a
heck of a show here.

461
00:16:51,478 --> 00:16:55,046
So, one day I will be

462
00:16:55,048 --> 00:17:00,218
president of this fine land.

463
00:17:00,220 --> 00:17:03,821
Hello, I'm acting up here!

464
00:17:03,823 --> 00:17:04,589
Get to the point

465
00:17:04,591 --> 00:17:05,623
where you get shot in the head.

466
00:17:05,625 --> 00:17:07,792
They'll like that.

467
00:17:07,794 --> 00:17:09,894
But nobody's even paying attention.

468
00:17:09,896 --> 00:17:10,762
Excuse me?

469
00:17:10,764 --> 00:17:11,729
What?

470
00:17:11,731 --> 00:17:13,664
We're playing "Brain Crush."

471
00:17:13,666 --> 00:17:14,932
So?

472
00:17:14,934 --> 00:17:16,501
Could you shut up?

473
00:17:16,503 --> 00:17:21,939
[All talking at once]

474
00:17:21,941 --> 00:17:25,009
[Crying]

475
00:17:25,011 --> 00:17:25,877
All right.

476
00:17:25,879 --> 00:17:27,211
Are you guys happy now?

477
00:17:27,213 --> 00:17:31,482
You made Baberaham Lincoln cry.

478
00:17:31,484 --> 00:17:32,016
That's it!

479
00:17:32,018 --> 00:17:34,352
Gimme your, hand me your phone.

480
00:17:34,354 --> 00:17:34,952
Stop it.

481
00:17:34,954 --> 00:17:37,522
This is not the time
to play "Brain Crush."

482
00:17:37,524 --> 00:17:44,062
Gimme the... Stupid bandages!

483
00:17:44,064 --> 00:17:48,132
There will be a short intermission!

484
00:17:48,134 --> 00:17:49,367
[Crying]

485
00:17:49,369 --> 00:17:51,669
I'm so sorry, Abe.

486
00:17:51,671 --> 00:17:53,337
I tried.

487
00:17:53,339 --> 00:17:57,241
I tried my best, but I failed.

488
00:17:57,243 --> 00:17:59,644
I guess... I guess theaters

489
00:17:59,646 --> 00:18:04,048
are just bad luck for us.

490
00:18:04,050 --> 00:18:07,051
Hey, you okay?

491
00:18:07,053 --> 00:18:09,487
No.

492
00:18:09,489 --> 00:18:12,490
I worked really hard on this play.

493
00:18:12,492 --> 00:18:14,525
And all those stupid people

494
00:18:14,527 --> 00:18:18,429
care about is playing
stupid "Brain Crush!"

495
00:18:18,431 --> 00:18:19,597
You're still gonna pop

496
00:18:19,599 --> 00:18:23,101
that thing on my back, right?

497
00:18:23,103 --> 00:18:24,302
I'm going home!

498
00:18:24,304 --> 00:18:25,603
No you're not!

499
00:18:25,605 --> 00:18:26,504
You're gonna go back out there

500
00:18:26,506 --> 00:18:29,073
and finish your terrible play.

501
00:18:29,075 --> 00:18:30,541
Make them pay attention!

502
00:18:30,543 --> 00:18:31,375
How?

503
00:18:31,377 --> 00:18:32,777
I mean, normally I'd
march right out there

504
00:18:32,779 --> 00:18:33,511
and force those jerks

505
00:18:33,513 --> 00:18:34,579
to quit playing their games,

506
00:18:34,581 --> 00:18:35,746
but Dice crushed my hands

507
00:18:35,748 --> 00:18:41,319
so I can't exactly... [Karate yells]

508
00:18:41,321 --> 00:18:42,553
Wait here.

509
00:18:42,555 --> 00:18:43,888
Fix your makeup.

510
00:18:43,890 --> 00:18:45,456
What? Why?

511
00:18:45,458 --> 00:18:51,863
What are you gonna do?

512
00:18:51,865 --> 00:18:53,898
Oh, Abe.

513
00:18:53,900 --> 00:18:55,109
Why such a tall hat?

514
00:19:04,711 --> 00:19:05,877
All right, people.

515
00:19:05,879 --> 00:19:07,311
This is your last chance.

516
00:19:07,313 --> 00:19:08,880
Are you gonna put your games away

517
00:19:08,882 --> 00:19:11,582
and watch Cat's play or not?

518
00:19:11,584 --> 00:19:12,650
Level 56!

519
00:19:12,652 --> 00:19:15,353
[Gasps]

520
00:19:15,355 --> 00:19:16,954
Okay.

521
00:19:16,956 --> 00:19:17,822
Kodomo tachi!

522
00:19:17,824 --> 00:19:19,190
Koko eh koi!

523
00:19:19,192 --> 00:19:25,096
[Yelling]

524
00:19:25,098 --> 00:19:27,965
Sah, sukuleen wo bukkowase!

525
00:19:27,967 --> 00:19:30,005
[Yelling]

526
00:19:34,007 --> 00:19:34,939
Come on. Come on!

527
00:19:34,941 --> 00:19:36,919
Get hers! Get hers!

528
00:19:48,421 --> 00:19:49,520
Yes!

529
00:19:49,522 --> 00:19:51,195
Kodomo tachi!

530
00:19:57,197 --> 00:19:58,496
Take his!

531
00:19:58,498 --> 00:19:59,997
Yeah, what she said!

532
00:19:59,999 --> 00:20:05,069
Get 'em!

533
00:20:05,071 --> 00:20:06,279
Oh... yes!

534
00:20:14,781 --> 00:20:18,883
[Speaking Japanese]

535
00:20:18,885 --> 00:20:22,353
[Groans]

536
00:20:22,355 --> 00:20:25,389
You used the kids from the doojoo.
- Yup.

537
00:20:25,391 --> 00:20:26,857
Now, I want you to
pull yourself together

538
00:20:26,859 --> 00:20:28,326
and finish doing the worst play

539
00:20:28,328 --> 00:20:29,594
that anyone's ever seen.

540
00:20:29,596 --> 00:20:33,197
I'll do it!

541
00:20:33,199 --> 00:20:36,834
Pay attention!

542
00:20:36,836 --> 00:20:38,411
Well, tiddle me winks.

543
00:20:47,413 --> 00:20:49,914
Sam, I can't get my beard off.

544
00:20:49,916 --> 00:20:50,915
Why can't you?

545
00:20:50,917 --> 00:20:53,084
'Cause I used grizzly glue.

546
00:20:53,086 --> 00:20:54,318
What?

547
00:20:54,320 --> 00:20:55,653
Grizzly glue is permanent!

548
00:20:55,655 --> 00:20:57,121
Ya dip!

549
00:20:57,123 --> 00:20:58,456
Oh, fiddle pie.

550
00:20:58,458 --> 00:21:00,191
Come here, baby.

551
00:21:00,193 --> 00:21:01,726
Nona, what are you gonna... w'cha!

552
00:21:01,728 --> 00:21:03,794
Ow!

553
00:21:03,796 --> 00:21:07,765
Smothers brothers!

554
00:21:07,767 --> 00:21:10,268
That hurt!

555
00:21:10,270 --> 00:21:11,435
I can't believe I got

556
00:21:11,437 --> 00:21:13,070
so addicted to "Brain Crush."

557
00:21:13,072 --> 00:21:15,172
Me either, but holy moth balls

558
00:21:15,174 --> 00:21:17,141
did I love it!

559
00:21:17,143 --> 00:21:18,476
Everybody loves it.

560
00:21:18,478 --> 00:21:19,777
Yeah, until people get bored with it,

561
00:21:19,779 --> 00:21:23,147
then get obsessed with
the next dumb game.

562
00:21:23,149 --> 00:21:25,783
I feel so sad for the world.

563
00:21:25,785 --> 00:21:26,517
Why?

564
00:21:26,519 --> 00:21:28,319
'Cause it's so awful

565
00:21:28,321 --> 00:21:30,121
how people spend so much time

566
00:21:30,123 --> 00:21:33,524
staring at screens, playing dumb games,

567
00:21:33,526 --> 00:21:35,459
tweeting, texting.

568
00:21:35,461 --> 00:21:36,027
It's true.

569
00:21:36,029 --> 00:21:36,794
It's terrible.

570
00:21:36,796 --> 00:21:37,228
Yeah.

571
00:21:37,230 --> 00:21:37,828
People have gotten so

572
00:21:37,830 --> 00:21:39,430
obsessed with their electronics,

573
00:21:39,432 --> 00:21:39,997
they've forgotten

574
00:21:39,999 --> 00:21:41,699
to appreciate the real world

575
00:21:41,701 --> 00:21:44,068
that's all around them.

576
00:21:44,070 --> 00:21:44,769
Totally.

577
00:21:44,771 --> 00:21:48,406
That's true.

578
00:21:48,408 --> 00:21:51,309
So, what do you guys wanna do?

579
00:21:51,311 --> 00:21:52,310
Watch TV?

580
00:21:52,312 --> 00:21:53,077
Yes!

581
00:21:53,079 --> 00:21:55,246
Yay, boy.

582
00:21:55,248 --> 00:21:56,213
[TV] Don't rush it

583
00:21:56,215 --> 00:21:57,815
'cause you gotta flush it.

584
00:21:57,817 --> 00:21:58,516
[Flushing]

585
00:21:58,518 --> 00:21:59,950
It's time for another episode

586
00:21:59,952 --> 00:22:02,486
of "toilet wars."

587
00:22:02,488 --> 00:22:04,028
[Sighing]

588
00:22:10,730 --> 00:22:12,863
Is that my toothbrush?
>> Would I own a pink toothbrush

589
00:22:12,865 --> 00:22:14,365
that does this?

590
00:22:14,367 --> 00:22:16,567
♪ Teeth, teeth, teeth ♪ I'm brushing

591
00:22:16,569 --> 00:22:18,602
♪ all my teeth, teeth, teeth

592
00:22:18,604 --> 00:22:19,470
♪ you gotta always brush

593
00:22:19,472 --> 00:22:21,205
♪ your teeth, teeth, teeth

594
00:22:21,207 --> 00:22:25,109
♪ to keep 'em clean all day

595
00:22:25,111 --> 00:22:27,411
♪ teeth, teeth, teeth ♪ you know I love

596
00:22:27,413 --> 00:22:29,246
♪ my teeth, teeth, teeth

597
00:22:29,248 --> 00:22:30,081
♪ 'cause without 'em

598
00:22:30,083 --> 00:22:31,916
♪ I can't eat, eat, eat

599
00:22:31,918 --> 00:22:35,820
♪ so I brush 'em every way [oven bell]