- Hey, Ms. Mullen. - Finn, your father was just telling me
how he's putting himself up as an auction prize.
(Scarlet) A day with Keegan Deane.
Marcus still hates you.
If the mayor keeps hating me and we keep talking.
- Who knows where this could lead? - [Chuckles]
You owe us $63,000.
I'll be looking for you.
Has this house gone insane? What is up with you two?
My marriage... I can't do it anymore, Keegan.
You're gonna bring your teacher here to have sex with her?
- I love her. - Finn, your mom...
She thinks I'm the one who's hot for teacher.
I need your help with one of my former clients.
- Just stay away from Mikki. - What, you mean the slut?
Good to catch up, Clay.
[Groans]
(Mikki) Yeah, it was an amazing life...
I mean, beyond charmed. [Chuckles]
I told you my dad was a diplomat.
We got to...
Go to all these fabulous places
- and meet all these fabulous people. - I know. It was a fairy tale.
Yeah, and then when I was 17,
my parents were killed in a plane crash...
And everything fell apart.
I turned to all sorts of stuff.
It got really, really dark for me
for a really long time.
Jules saved my life when he found me.
I mean, Keegan, do you get this? He literally saved my life.
And now I have a chance to start again,
so that's what I'm doing.
I'm starting again.
Why are you telling me this now?
Because I want you to understand.
And because I owe it to you.
- What? - [Chuckles] Come on.
- Really? - [Laughs]
Oh. "Backgammon for blood:
A guide for those who like to play but"...
(Both) Love to win.
That's me.
For helping me with Clay Randolph.
- What are not-quite friends for? - Right.
You sure you don't want some of this?
- It's from downstairs. - No, thank you.
[Mutters indistinctly, clears throat]
We could go out, but I read that there's over
9,400 full-service restaurants in Los Angeles.
Oh, my God, that is, like, too many choices.
Exactly. Stalin was right.
- Was he? - Mm-hmm.
Too many choices would be the decadent west's undoing.
Commodity fetishism. I think that was Karl Marx.
See, this is good, right?
- We can be pals. - Yeah, it's good.
I don't know how this "pals" manifests itself.
We can play it by ear. It was Marx.
For example, I got a birthday party this week.
Got to go. I'm dreading it.
There'll be a lot of lawyers there, people.
It's just...
You could go with me as a... pal?
- Would that be too... - Probably a little too date-ish.
- That's what I think too. - Good.
This is surprisingly good.
[Dog barking]
[Siren in distance]
(Man) Hey! Hey, you! Hey!
(Officer) LAPD! Stop where you are!
[Siren wailing]
[Tires squeal]
Oh! [Grunts]
Get up, sir.
Please get up. Hands behind your back.
Okay, please.
Please just don't tell my mom.
You have the right to remain silent.
- Where's Dad? - He's at work.
Hmm, well, I'm supposed to interview him
about what his favorite things are.
Well, I can probably help you.
You know I know everything about your father.
Okay.
- Okay. - Okay.
What's his favorite color?
Blue.
Favorite kind of music?
Rock and roll.
Led Zeppelin.
Led Zeppelin?
Mm-hmm.
All right, what's his favorite piece of clothing?
His necktie...
The one with the mermaids on it.
Cool, mom.
Yeah, that's the nice thing about being married to someone.
You get to know them so well.
There's no surprises.
Fog. Zog.
[Chuckles]
Dog.
Bollocks. Okay, second word.
- Bevan. - Boyfriend from Scotland?
- Is he having a seizure? - Stop.
We're playing charades. He's really good.
Yeah, no, he looks committed.
We've moved into Mr. Hardy's office.
Dr. Goodman, your 9:00 A.M., is here.
Great. Love the doctor clients.
It... he's not actually a...
Okay, sounds like?
Dr. Goodman. Good morning, sir.
- What a pleasure. Keegan Deane. - Steven Goodman.
- This is my son Louis. - [Switch clicks]
Oh, all right, well, sit down here.
- What's your field? - Oh, uh, hepatology.
Oh. I don't like snakes.
That's herpetology. Hepatology's the liver.
Right. Well, I knew it was something slimy.
- [Chuckles] - How can I help you, sir?
I don't need any help. I'm... I'm here about my...
My son's winning auction prize.
Uh-huh.
Win a day with a lawyer...
The school auction prize.
Oh, right. Of course, of course.
- Is that today? - Yes.
And I have to be in surgery all day,
so I really need to run.
I have given all my information
to the young lady out front there.
Louis, be good.
No, no, no. Hold on for a second.
Leanne!
Where's my ca... This isn't on my calendar!
She knows.
There's a language barrier there.
Sir, there's no possible way
I can take this young man today, okay?
And for the record,
a day with a lawyer is...
You know, my time's fairly valuable here.
I might be able to let the little guy watch me
roll calls for 90 minutes at some point, but that's it.
I paid for a whole day.
I understand that, sir. How much did you pay?
$150.
$150? That was the winning bid?
That was the only bid.
I paid $12,000 for a bench at that thing.
I-I really do need to...
What?
"Day with the auction kid."
Okay, but I don't read this crap.
You know that. You got to be more efficient.
The man's standing here...
Where's your...
Where... where did your dad go?
Hey!
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Hey!
- Dr. Goodman. - [Pen clicks]
No, no, no.
Unbelievable.
You call this guy,
and you tell him to pick him up in 90 minutes,
or he's gonna be in the lobby.
- Can I have this? - Yeah, sure.
Actually, no. No, sorry. See... hi.
That's very, um, expensive.
See, this pipe belonged to sir Arthur Conan Doyle,
and I think Mr. Hardy would be very upset
if he knew it was missing.
(Keegan) So what?
You want to be a lawyer? Is that the idea?
A lot of reading. You like reading?
Let me guess. You see dead people.
Hey, you got to help me out here.
No, no, no, I don't do kids.
What's on the schedule?
You have a 10:30 tax hearing with David Potter.
Other than that, it's pretty slow.
I guess I could try the rotunda.
Take a child to the rotunda... really?
We all have to grow up sometime, Leanne.
[Crows cawing, electricity crackles]
(Keegan) This is it.
They call it the rotunda.
It's not pretty, but if you're
a lawyer looking for a quick client,
these are the feeding grounds.
Yeah, I'm stuck here all day, okay?
Just tell him ten units on the first account.
Hey.
For the record, I reject the term "ambulance chasing."
This is the last line of defense
for the common man looking for justice.
So, if you were to find a nice,
above-average-looking common man,
you just... sit down here.
Do this.
[Woman sighs]
My father taught me never to walk past
a beautiful woman in distress.
Oh, thank you.
I'm fine.
Somebody in trouble... Husband? Brother?
Georgie, my son.
Oh.
I got a son of my own.
I tell you, they can be a handful.
Oh, he's a good boy.
[Chuckles]
Isn't he a little angel?
Oh, a balding, middle-aged little angel.
Look at him... Adorable.
I do everything for him.
I cook his meals, lay out his clothes.
Sometimes if Georgie's not feeling bashful,
he lets me make him a piping-hot bubble bath.
Honey hibiscus is his favorite.
I can feel my muscles relaxing just thinking about that.
[Both chuckle]
Well, not to say he's perfect.
You know, he makes mistakes.
But I'm the one who brought him into this wicked world,
so I'm to blame for what happened.
Not to pry, but was he arrested?
Trespassing.
Taking a shortcut through a neighbor's yard is what he said,
but I think he's lying to me.
Oh...
Lying to his mother.
Why?
I think I can help.
Really?
But only if you quit crying.
You can help us?
Ma'am, I'm so good at helping people, I do it for money.
Okay, so arrested 9/19.
Complainant Molly Boudreau?
Defendant George Copely... That's you...
Arrested for loitering, trespassing, and...
Index?
[Chuckles]
All right, this'll be pretty straightforward stuff, George.
It's fine. You want to run down to the vending machine?
- Grab me a little something, kiddo? - I'm fine.
- How about for yourself? My treat. - No.
- They got King-Kongs. - No, thanks.
He doesn't want to do it. All right, your loss.
Uh, you understand what the...
What the case is here pretty much.
No.
It's a deviancy case, George, so...
I don't understand.
Your Tom was peeping.
Hold on. Now, that's what they... I'm not a peeping Tom.
What's a peeping Tom?
Come on, just... Why don't you just sit...
There you go. Just take a little look out there out the window,
and I'll be right back.
- Okay, look... - I know.
Listen, I am the victim here.
- Okay? - Yeah.
Not closing her blinds,
prancing around where anyone and everyone can see?
She will not leave me alone.
Right.
Well, maybe you crossed a line,
but the truth is what red-blooded American
hasn't taken a peek or two?
Or three?
Four...
Nine?
When I watch Molly...
I'm not looking at everything.
That would be vulgar.
I'm a specialist.
I-I'm only interested
in one very specific part of her.
Uh-huh. What part is that?
The areola...
The part around the nipple.
Hers are perfect.
They are like this magical blend
of color, texture, and circular-ness.
When I'm... when I'm standing in the shadows
outside of her window and I look in
and the light hits it, it's like a halo.
Keep your voice down. You're gonna alarm the kid.
Look, this is fine.
I got enough here to bring to the judge for bail, okay?
We'll be fine.
This is just between us, right?
- Uh-huh. - 'Cause my mom's gonna ask.
Whatever you do, don't tell her.
No, we don't want her to think you have issues.
No, listen!
Just...
If she finds out, then t-that would be bad.
You're sure it's just trespassing?
- Yeah, the city's cracking down. - [Pen clicking rapidly]
They really want people off each other's lawns.
The arrest report said George was charged
with trespassing and index.
What does this "index" mean?
It's basically, uh, anything limited to
but not exclusively outside of the scope of a...
It's so hard to explain. It's a legalese issue.
There's nothing else you want to tell me?
Remember, I'm his mother.
And you're doing a wonderful job.
Thank you so much, Mrs. Copely. I'll be in touch, all right?
Thank you.
(Ben) Kee, the rotunda? Things that bad?
What are you doing here?
Well, I'm not here. I'm just dropping something off.
- Yeah, I'm just helping the kid out. - The kid?
Yeah, I'm just doing some charity work for Finn's school.
Kid's dad broke the bank so he could tail me for the day.
[Chuckles] Showing him the good, the bad, and the ugly.
Good for you.
Hey, you going to Bergson's dinner party tomorrow?
I was hoping to bring a date.
Come on, Scarlet and I will be there.
- I don't know. - Since when do you need a date?
You'll just end up going home with the hostess.
Hey, how's Scarlet doing?
Scarlet? She's great.
[Cell phone ringing]
Hello?
Hey, sweetie. You're working at home today?
- Mm-hmm. - So I was thinking
maybe we go crazy and shake things up a bit tonight.
Oh, yeah? What'd you have in mind?
Instead of cooking, let's order in.
Chinese, thai... What do you think?
Chinese is fine. The usual?
You got it. Scar, you okay?
Yeah.
I'm great.
So that is pretty much it, kiddo.
That's the job.
Should probably get you back home.
We'll give your dad a call.
It's only 10:18.
Crap. Come on, kid, we're off to see the wizard.
[Telephone ringing]
Yes, Jeanette?
(Jeanette) I'm sorry, Mrs. Barzmann,
but the mayor's still stuck in his meeting.
[Scoffs]
He knows we had a breakfast date for over an hour ago, right?
I'll ring you when he's available.
[Electric razor buzzing, pen clicks]
What's it gonna be today, Deane, hmm?
Your motion for continuance...
What's your latest nonsense excuse?
Fire, alien invasion, locusts?
Something tells me your luck's
about to run out, so it better be good.
- Oh, it's good, Harry. - Yeah, it better be.
[Chuckles] I'm starting to think you don't like me, Harry.
I'm gonna speak honestly,
which is something that you're obviously incapable of doing.
- "Like" has nothing to do with it. - Oh.
I am here because you violated tax code 24-B77-C,
and I am here to make sure that you're held accountable.
I don't think that's it.
I think I make you feel like
you're missing out on a good time.
You know? You could be the guy who gets the pretty girl
and the party invites and the last laugh too.
Give me a break.
No, I'm not kidding. You just got to relax.
Let your hair down a little bit.
Try wearing a different tie, or is that issued by the IRS?
You know, I'm here to do my job.
You want to make it personal? You go ahead.
You just said I was incapable of speaking honestly, Harry.
You know what you're capable of?
You're capable of being
a smug, self-serving, tax-evading shyster.
My name is David Potter,
and this tie was given to me by my mother, so back off.
(Judge Rutchland) All right, we're back.
Mr. Deane, have you cleared up
the matter of your financial records?
Good news, Your Honor.
My, uh, contacts in the Bulgarian consulate
are making progress in finding a translator.
Meanwhile, I wanted to read some results
from the mold survey of the basement
- where my financial records are kept. - No.
Excuse me, Your Honor?
Your excuses may be infinite,
but this court's patience is not.
Are you or are you not prepared to make restitution
to the U.S. government?
Today?
Very well.
It is the opinion of this court
that the government has laid out a strong
and substantial case of tax evasion.
As such, I am prepared
to rule that the government may proceed with the filing
of both civil charges against the defendant.
[Sobbing]
What's the matter?
My dad.
He's sick, and I'm sad.
(Judge Rutchland) Mr. Deane...
- What? - Are we losing your attention, Mr. Deane?
No. Sorry. He's sick? What?
My dad... He's in the hospital.
With whom are you speaking, Mr. Deane?
[Sobs]
This... this is my ward, Your Honor.
Your ward?
Yes, I'm sorry for my lack of preparedness today, Your Honor,
but the young man's father is in surgery today.
I've been asked to keep his spirits up.
Is this true, young man?
Your father's in the hospital?
Yes, sir.
Liver transplant.
[Sobbing] (Keegan) Shh. Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh.
Okay, okay, okay.
Well, that was a close one. Thank you.
Well, you have to do something for me now.
Anything. You name it.
Quite the plate spinner, aren't you, Keegan, hmm?
Oh, it's not really a good time, Potter.
My ward's...
He's pretty upset.
No matter how smart you think you are,
one of these days you are gonna stumble,
and all those little plates
are gonna come crashing down around you.
Now, I hope that I am there to watch them shatter.
[Cell phone rings]
Plate spinning. People even do that?
(Maddy) Your son's sleeping with his teacher, and you knew about it?
I can not believe this.
- How can you be so irresponsible? - Sweetheart, breathe.
- You breathe, Bruce. - Let's all agree to keep breathing.
Tell me again what you saw.
Finn left his backpack, so I drove to the school,
and that's where I saw them,
kissing in the kiln room, and you knew all about it!
I didn't know anything about a kiln room.
And how about the fact that I didn't sleep with her?
Remember when you were all worried about that?
What kind of a father lets a fully grown woman
molest his son?
Okay, I probably should've taken a harder line.
- But I think we're overreacting here. - She's his teacher.
She's 20 years older than him.
You know, I'm of the school that believes a young man
can be just as sexually vulnerable as a young woman.
You're of the school, Bruce?
Well, I'm of the house, as in why are you in mine?
The same could be asked about the weird kid out in the waiting room.
Maddy, that boy won me.
That's it. We're done. You should leave.
This isn't that unusual.
My first kiss was with the wife of my troop leader.
I turned out okay.
We're done.
Finn, hey, it's your dad, okay?
We really need to talk.
So give me a call when you get a chance, all right?
Bye.
All right, buddy.
You got your 150 bucks' worth. All right?
We're gonna grab you a bus, get you home.
You promised you'd do something for me.
What do you want... A lolly,
an ice cream, a raven?
What?
Inglewood Park... Heard of it?
It's real.
(Male announcer) And they're off.
(Louis) This is the horse's third start off a layoff.
The trainer gave him two sprint starts
to put some speed into him.
And he's got Hernandez in the saddle...
His go-to jockey
hitting at 22% for the barn.
Still, is this wrong?
I didn't go to the track till I was a teenager.
I think this might be wrong.
Yeah, but you still bet my $500?
Yep.
And everything that was in my wallet.
Yes, yes, yes!
Go, go, go!
Oh!
38-1.
That's incredible.
That's... what's next?
Who do you got in the fifth?
Just the fourth, okay?
- Calm down and go get my money. - Okay!
And, yes, I would like an ice cream.
Anything you want, kid.
[Cell phone rings]
Hello?
I told you not to say anything to my mom.
Oh, relax, George. I didn't say anything.
(George) She was asking me about this index charge.
What the hell is that?
I don't remember doing any index.
That's a standard abbreviation.
"Index" stands for "indecent exposure."
(George) God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God.
If she finds out...
No, I don't think it's a bad thing.
I'm sensing the two of you could benefit from a little distance.
No, you're not listening to me.
If... this could turn out to be very, very, very bad.
No, no, you're being negative.
Never know how something's gonna turn out.
Life's full of surprises.
Hey, pal.
Small world.
I'll call you back.
No, that's not my money.
Oh, I couldn't agree with you more.
I'll just subtract it from what you owe me.
Roy, you don't understand.
You're taking money from a kid.
And it's time for that kid to grow up.
Nice running into you, kee.
Roy.
Hey.
Look what I got for you.
Huh?
And my money?
All right, so I told you about gambling, all right?
Sometimes you lose even when you win.
Tough lesson, right? I'll get your money back.
Look, I don't want my money back, okay?
I want my winnings... $19,000.
And if I don't get it, something's gonna happen.
(Keegan) Is that right?
You gonna... you gonna twist my arm, break my legs?
There's a waiting list. Take this. Let's go.
The other day, I met a stranger
who took me down into the rotunda,
and he whispered to a peeping Tom
and lied to a little, old lady.
And then he took me to a horse-racey place
and took my money and roughly touched my body.
Afterwards, he said he was sorry,
and then he bought me an ice cream.
[Sobs]
I got to hand it to you... you're gonna make a hell of a lawyer.
Keegan Deane?
Come with us, please.
If this is you, I'm even more impressed.
[Overlapping shouts]
Thank you. I'll take it from here.
Who is this?
My ward.
We need to talk in private.
Sit down. Sit down.
Pin cushion. Amuse yourself.
[Pen clicks]
All right, what the hell is going on here?
Vladimir makes all my dresses.
- Gloria. - [Sighs]
I wanted to see you. Yeah, I understand that.
I just spent 30 minutes in the back of a squad car.
What do you want?
I don't think you understand the trouble that you're in.
Well, enlighten me.
My husband hates you.
We both know that, but you don't know Marcus.
He becomes very focused on anything that annoys him,
and once he is focused, he will do whatever he can
to remove that annoyance.
So this is a threat?
You think Marcus got to where he got by making empty threats?
This is the truth.
And he sends his wife down here to deliver the message.
The guy's a piece of work. I got to go.
He doesn't know that I'm here.
That would be bad for both of us.
Well, then why are you doing this?
I don't know.
Maybe I'm trying to protect you.
Why?
Maybe I like you.
Be careful.
Hey.
Where... where's the kid?
- Hey! Louis. - [Cell phone rings]
Hello?
(Mrs. Copely) Index... I found out what it means.
I'm very sorry, Mrs. Copely.
George is a good boy.
He would never index himself to anyone,
not without a good reason.
Well, I think he might've had two good reasons.
It's a wicked, wicked world.
30 on the first, 20 on the second, okay?
Yeah, it's that simple, Todd.
20 on the first, 30 on the second.
- That's right. - Hey!
What the hell are you doing?
No, that's it. Hey, you can't just disappear like that.
Yeah, I should probably go. Lawyer guy's freaking out again.
- All right? Down! - See ya.
That's it!
- That's it! - That's it?
- That's it. - Down!
How did you get up there?
[Tires screech]
I want my money!
God!
That felt good. That felt good!
[Dials phone]
[Line trilling]
(Mrs. Copely) You've reached the Copely residence. Leave a message.
Mrs. Copely, it's, uh... It's Keegan Deane
calling you back about the, uh...
Index thing.
Call me back if you have any questions.
(Female TV reporter) More details on the murder in gardena.
Reports indicate the victim, Molly Boudreau,
had a history of complaints against George Copely,
the man now in custody.
A man who tragically was released from custody
just this morning on the insistence of his lawyer.
Hey.
A-are you okay?
Yes. Yeah.
Okay, the... I'm sorry.
Where were we?
I walked up to her. She was sitting in the car.
I pointed my gun, and then...
[Knock at door]
I'm with a client.
Yeah, well, now you got two,
and both confessing to the same crime.
[Door closes]
I walked up to her sitting in her car,
pointed my gun at the floozy,
and fired three shots through the windshield.
Blam! Blam!
I got her twice.
And then, blam! Again, just to be sure.
And I watched the life pass out of her.
Stupid tramp.
I got rid of the gun, tossed it in the reservoir.
Threw the revolver in the landfill
and got back on the bus.
Why? Why'd you do it?
She kept taking off her clothes
right in front of her windows.
And she wasn't about to quit her vicious ways,
not with all her flouncing around
in front of that open window like a whore.
- What did she expect? - What did she expect?
I'm not saying I was right, but I did it.
I'm sorry, but I can't take it back.
I am guilty.
And I deserve to be punished.
Stop. Your son confessed to murdering Molly Boudreau.
Now, one of you needs to come clean.
Tell me what the hell is going on here.
He's lying.
She's lying.
Two confessions?
[Chuckles] You are so screwed.
Well, at least I can double-bill them.
It's not just two confessions. It's two indictments.
(Ben) Which means the D.A.'s just as confused as you are.
Or they're confident enough in their case
to let the jury sort it out.
She's right, pal. You're screwed.
Sure it costs more, but you can't put a price
on protecting the planet.
Correct.
- Mm-hmm. - Mm-hmm.
Absolutely correct.
- Mm-hmm. - Mm-hmm.
What the hell is Harry Potter doing here?
I guess he's a friend of Bergson's.
Come on, Potter's not that bad.
What's it gonna be...
Baseball bats in the parking lot,
or are we gonna cut his brake cables?
Well, don't get caught.
You'll miss out on your double billing.
(Keegan) Would you back off?
There is no conspiracy here, Scarlet.
All indications are that the Copelys
acted independently.
One of them committed the crime
while the other one took credit for it.
One of them's completely innocent...
And one of them is completely guilty.
She's right, pal. You're completely screwed.
Thanks.
(Woman) Correct. Absolutely correct.
- (David) Mikhaela. - [Mikki giggles]
Um, this is William.
Uh, he's the one I was telling you about.
He...
Sor... I'm just gonna go to the restroom. Sorry.
(David) Oh, okay. I'll see you in a sec.
Excuse me.
(Woman) Absolutely correct.
Harry frickin' Potter?
What?
- No. - Yes.
Don't. Don't.
Don't "don't" me.
I am the one doing the don't-ing here.
Oh, my God, how am I supposed to know it's the same guy?
You always called him Harry.
Since when? When did it start?
Just a few months?
He gave a seminar at law school.
- He's a tax attorney! - So?
You understand that's pretty much considered
the child molester of the legal community.
He is a great guy.
He's kind and decent and loyal and honest.
Exactly. There's any number of reasons why he's wrong for you.
Hey. Hey.
Has it occurred to you that this could all be about me?
Huh?
Hey, what better way to get back at your enemy
than to corrupt his favorite prostitute?
Excuse me?
Unless you haven't told him.
Told him what?
About your previous life as a professional solicitor?
No, I have not told him, and I never will.
And neither will you, okay?
Keegan, please. Please.
Please.
As a not-quite friend, right?
[Laughs]
Okay, so I'll see you over there.
- Good night. I'll see you tomorrow. - Take a cab home.
Good night.
Look, if we can do our part for the planet
while keeping the kids safe, I mean, why not drive one?
Correct.
Mm-hmm.
- Absolutely correct. - Mm-hmm.
I'm sorry. Is it Linda?
Betsy.
I'm sorry to interrupt, but I'm curious.
I noticed you say the word "correct" a lot.
- Really? - Yeah.
When somebody says something that you agree with,
you don't say, "yes,"
or, "uh-huh,"
or, "you go, girl,"
you say, "correct." [Chuckles]
I'm sorry. What's your point?
My point is, is you're not agreeing at all,
you're approving.
You're implying her statement isn't valid
until you deem it so.
It's a way of being smug and superior.
Soon your kids will be saying it,
sitting in the back of their luxury vehicles.
Buying an $80,000
hybrid S.U.V. For the sake of the planet
and the children?
That has to be the most insipid and ridiculous happy horse crap
I've ever heard in my entire life.
[People gasp]
You go, girl.
And over the course of this trial,
I have no doubt that justice will be served.
Here comes Cicero.
To paraphrase the words of the great athenian jurist Cicero...
Never fails.
The magistrates are the ministers for the law,
the judges their interpreters,
and you, the people, are servants of the law...
That we all may be free.
Mr. Deane, your opening?
Not long after Cicero said those words,
the people felt free to cut off his head
and nail it up to the forum, right?
That's an interesting little tidbit there...
Anything else? A defense for your clients, perhaps?
We're all curious to hear...
I understand. Just one moment, Your Honor.
Last chance.
- It was me. - I did it.
Two confessions, two defendants,
one horrific crime.
One of these people is gonna go to prison
for the rest of their natural lives.
And the other is gonna walk out of here free.
There's no conspiracy charge here.
The prosecution concedes that the killer,
whoever that is, acted alone.
Only question is, who acted?
Who pulled the trigger?
[Both mouth words]
Honestly, I'm tempted to come clean with you guys today.
It's not usually my style,
and honesty tends to be frowned upon in my line of work.
There's ethical complications.
No matter how bad they seem, everybody deserves a defense.
There's rules to this job, right?
But maybe just this once,
we say, "screw the rules."
Huh?
Ladies and gentlemen, this man, George Copely,
shot and killed Molly Boudreau.
He did it!
He's a repeat sexual offender
whose own highly particular obsession with the victim
drove him to madness and to murder.
He had motive,
opportunity, and credible intent to commit this crime.
I mean, the guy is a self-described
areola aficionado, for God sakes.
Let's skip to the end of this thing and go home.
He's guilty.
But it's not that easy, is it?
'Cause we got the woman...
A protective mother
whose son's most recent arrest caused her to snap.
She took out her shame on her boy's tormentor.
This is a woman who witnesses will testify
was overheard screaming at the victim
an hour before the murder, calling her a "tarty witch"
who "better release my Georgie"
from her spell "or suffer the consequences."
This woman, Dorothy Copely,
shot and killed Molly Boudreau.
And so now you're all confused, right?
I am too.
I'm confident one of my clients is a cold-blooded murderer.
But which one?
I don't know.
I have doubts about both.
And I'll bet many of you do too.
So it follows that if we have doubts
over which defendant is guilty,
we must also have doubts over which one is innocent.
And if that's true...
You have to acquit them both.
I'm not gonna try and convince you
that this is justice.
I can't.
It isn't.
It's just the law.
Thank you for helping us.
We couldn't have won without you.
Thanks.
Georgie, let's go. It's bath night.
I'm in no mood, kid.
I want my money.
Okay, you'll get your money, okay?
- I just need a little time. - $19,000.
A lot of time. Where the hell is my office?
- Down there. - Huh?
Oh.
[Scoffs]
What kind of person doesn't pay his debts?
Come on, kid.
I'm going through a little bit of a rough stretch here, okay?
Just... do me a personal favor and just give me a break?
Please?
Give me my money, or I'll do something.
Go ahead!
Scream! Shout! Release the hounds!
Tell everybody I touched you in your bathroom place.
That's right.
You got me confused with somebody who gives a crap.
You want to know what kind of person I am?
I'm the guy that gets murderers off
so they can go make this sideways circus fire of a city
the paradise that it is.
So go back to your bunker
and grow a hemlock or kick kittens or do whatever the hell
you were doing before we met, because we're done.
You understand? That's it.
Hemlock.
Okay, babe? Ah.
White Russian?
Mm-hmm. I'm getting my Lebowski on.
Your what?
Smokey, this is not nam.
This is bowling. There are rules.
[Laughs]
Has the whole world gone crazy?
[Laughter]
Come on, The Big Lebowski... My favorite movie.
I thought it was Caddyshack.
No, man, Lebowski.
The dude abides.
(Max) I'm sorry, mom.
About what?
You do not know everything about dad.
No, I guess I don't know everything about dad.
Go finish setting the table.
[Line trilling]
(Woman) Internal revenue service, enforcement division.
Harry... sorry. David Potter's office.
Who may I ask is calling?
Hello?
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