Narrator: This is Georgie and Poppy Carlton.
Poppy: Everybody's taking pictures of us.
Georgie: Georgie Carlton -- lovely to meet you.
Narrator: They are aristocratic siblings,
69th and 70th in line to the English throne.
Georgie: The British are coming,
and they're looking for a man called Derek.
Poppy: How do you do? Have you traveled far?
Narrator: It was their father's dying wish that his children
make a royal tour of the United States of America...
Georgie: Very exciting, father.
Narrator: A country he loved...
Georgie: Die, you American scum!
Narrator: In order to expand their horizons...
Are you familiar with hard work?
Poppy: No. Georgie: Yes, I'm familiar with the concept.
Narrator: Interact with real Americans...
Georgie: What made you want to become a cowboy, Jay?
Poppy: Was it "toy story 2" or "3"?
Narrator: Learn about their culture
and give something back...
Georgie: I hope I don't do a Grande Shitay
in these tights.
That did not go down well.
Narrator: To the land of the free and the home of the brave.
Georgie: Very exciting, about to go into battle.
Oh, God!
One, two, three --
Georgie: God save the queen. Thank you so much for having us.
Narrator: Poppy and Georgie are in Washington, D.C.,
the capital city and seat of government
of the United States of America.
Poppy: That must be the white house.
Georgie: Oh, yes!
Or maybe that's the white house.
Georgie: They should call it something more specific,
because there's a lot --
look, there's another white building.
There's tons of white houses!
Could be any one of them.
That's very confusing.
Georgie: It's definitely one of them, though.
Poppy: Yeah.
Georgie: Look what we have here.
Oh, goodness. Novelty.
Narrator: In order to learn about the capital
and meet more ordinary Americans...
Do we sit down on the seat?
I think so, yeah.
Jolly good.
Narrator: Poppy and Georgie are taking a bus tour
to Pennsylvania Avenue, and they've brought
their deceased father's ashes along for the ride.
Man: So what we're going to do is, we're going to take you guys
around our capitol.
[ Bus thumping ]
[ Thumping continues ]
Driver: You see that, and they say
that it rings every 15 minutes.
A lot of the buildings that you're going to see as we drive
around Washington, D.C.,
are inspired by European architecture.
Georgie: Good.
Driver: That's a fountain, but those were the first...
Whereabouts are you from?
Alaska?
Gosh.
Have you been to America before?
Oh, really?
That's nice.
Driver: I would say it is
the ugliest building in the city.
Now we're on the house of representatives
side of the capitol.
Georgie: These must be different houses, like Slytherin
and Hufflepuff.
How do you choose representatives?
A talking hat.
Winston Churchill!
Poppy: Where?
Oh, no, Martin Luther King.
I thought that was Winston Churchill.
[ Chuckles ]
It was really hilarious, man, really hilarious.
Daddy always said that I had
the makings of a great political leader.
Oh, yeah, he did, didn't he?
He always said you were like a little Hitler.
Yeah, who our grandpa thought was absolutely smashing.
Narrator: Whilst in the capital,
Poppy has decided to take the opportunity to further
her political ambitions
to become the high sheriff of Norfolk, England,
a ceremonial role of great prestige.
To this end, the Carltons are meeting Chris,
a renowned political coach.
Chris: If I can, George, I want you to watch your sister.
I'm going to have her -- I'm going to have you
present yourself as you're talking
to an audience that, "my name is Poppy,
and I'm running for sheriff because..."
"And I want to do this while sheriff."
I want to be sheriff of Norfolk
because I know
being sheriff of Norfolk is very important
for nor-- for Norfolk.
Do we need to wiggle the fingers, Chris?
No, we don't do jazzy hands.
Just, just -- comfortable, relaxed.
When you speak in public,
the most important thing
is to have a message.
My message is, I don't want to pay any tax,
I don't want to help other people,
we've had our money for centuries,
and we should not be giving -- paying
for free health care or free education.
What about the people who can't take care of themselves?
Our Uncle Humphrey couldn't take care of himself.
Who took care of him?
I don't know -- we cut him off, 'cause he was always grabbing.
Okay.
He moved to Goa.
Yeah.
Can I do my slogan for you?
Your what? I want a slogan.
Your slogan. Go ahead.
Carlton's Norfolk.
Where making matters better matters.
Maybe making matters better matters.
Carlton's Norfolk, where making matters better matters.
Georgie: No, where ma-- it's a b--
it's a bit confusing.
Where making matters
better matters.
Where making matters bet-- better matters.
Nearly -- "where making matters better matters."
Poppy, look at me and tell me what you want to do.
Make ma-- making matters --
you want to make life better for people.
Making matters better matters.
You just want to make it -- make it better.
Yeah. That matters.
Making life better matters.
I would like to make matters --
Chris: Better.
Better.
Matters.
Chris: [Claps] Yes! That's what you wanted to do.
Man: How was that?
Well, she-she-- in-in...
[ Sighs ]
To become an effective politician, you have to get
out of your own way.
You have to remember, it's not you
that's the important person in the conversation.
It's the other person.
That's what I said when I was
breaking up with Hugo --
"it's not me, it's you."
Right.
Poppy: Well, I didn't learn anything
from Chris Saxman.
'Cause personally, I don't ever
get bored of just hearing about me.
Or me.
I mean, I don't get bored of hearing about Poppy.
I get bored of hearing about me.
So.
Very tedious.
[ Cooing ]
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh!
Ooh.
Catch it, Delia!
Whaa!
[ Seagulls squawking ]
So, hang on, is this the white house or not?
That's the white house.
Look, who's that sleeping in the dark?
Creepy!
It reminds me of father in his office.
Except that fellow doesn't seem to be
holding the arms of his chair quite as tightly
or angrily.
[ "Hail to the chief" plays ]
Narrator: As part of their royal tour of America,
Poppy and Georgie are in Washington, D.C.
They have already traveled on a bus and spent time
with a political coach.
Tired of always being the passenger,
Poppy has decided to spend a free afternoon
learning to drive a motorcar.
She and Georgie have traveled outside of town
to meet Craig, an experienced instructor.
Craig: Okay, now, the first thing you want to do
is make all your adjustments.
You're going to want to be able
to push on the brake and have your heel on the ground.
Which is the brake again?
The one on the left side.
And right for accelerator,
or I call it "gas."
"Gas" in England is, if you say, "press on the gas,"
that sounds like you're going to do a long sort of fart.
Poppy: Where are
the hazard lights?
Here's the hazard lights
right here, see that button?
Okay. Like that?
See how they flash?
When do you do hazard lights?
If you get a flat tire and you're on the side of the road
and you've got to change the tire --
what about if you're about to tune the radio?
Georgie: It's sort of for anything,
really, isn't it, Craig?
For any kind of --
or if your phone goes and you need to pick up,
but you want to keep driving.
Keep your phones off. Too many distractions.
Can you use your hazard lights
if you think you might be pregnant?
Turn -- yeah, let's turn them off.
Okay, let's try it.
Poppy, you ready?
Go ahead and put it in drive.
What's "D" stand for?
"Drive."
What's "P" stand for? "Park."
What's "R" stand for? "Reverse."
What's "N" stand for? "Neutral."
What's "D" stand for?
"Drive."
What's "L" stand for? "Low gear".
Okay.
Okay, so we're just going to use the "D" right now, okay?
Just take your foot off the brake,
and the -- you don't need to --
hands on the steering wheel, Poppy!
Okay, good.
And take your foot off the brake,
and look over there, to where --
look where you're going, look where you're going!
Poppy: I'm doing it!
Craig: You're doing good.
Georgie: Very good, Poppy!
Craig: Turn back, Poppy.
What's that button for, "info"?
Uh, start turning, Poppy, keep your eyes on the road.
Turn -- there's a parked car there.
What about that button?
This is for the radio, things for the radio.
What about that one?
That's for the door locks.
Go straight.
What about that one?
That's, um, for the -- another button for the radio.
I love buttons.
In England, we would call those "buttons."
[ Brakes squealing ] Oh, my goodness!
Okay, you don't have to push the brake
really hard.
I thought I was going to hit the cameraman.
He's about 25 meters away!
Now just start squeezing the brake lightly.
[ Engine revving ]
Okay, now, put it in park.
What's "R" stand for? "Reverse."
What's "N" stand for? "Neutral."
What's "L" stand for? "Low gear."
What's "P" stand for? "Park."
Okay. Okay.
Now look over your left shoulder and start rolling backwards.
And then keep turning.
And now you're going to go back until you're parallel.
Slow down. Look behind you.
Oops. Now stop, right there.
Poppy, no need to look for the mirror right now.
You look fi-- you look great.
You look great. Okay -- Georgie: Poppy --
now put your left hand on top of the steering wheel.
Doing good.
Slow down. Now stop.
[ Brakes squeal ]
Okay, how do you think the lesson went?
10 out of 10.
All right! Thank you very much.
You guys were great students --
no, I meant for me.
[Laughs] Okay, yeah.
Sorry.
Georgie: You were okay as well, Craig.
Compared to my father, you were a little bit more by the book.
Poppy: I have to be careful going out, because one time,
Tabitha was getting out
of a car, and she was wearing a short dress,
and everyone saw her sponge.
[Laughs] Oh.
[Laughs] "Everyone saw her sponge."
Wasp, wasp! Stay still!
[ Buzzing ]
Narrator: To find out more about the ways of the capital...
Watch out -- he's got a hammer.
Narrator: Poppy and Georgie are visiting the corridors of power,
the house of representatives.
With these flags, it's much more of an American feel
than in England, isn't it?
I don't know what this one is, though.
What's this blue flag?
Maybe it's someone's birthday.
Narrator: Republican congressman Robert Aderholt
has taken time out
from affairs of state to meet the Carltons.
How are you? Good, thank you. How are you?
I'm doing great. And you? Hello.
You're from Alabama,
but you live in D.C.?
Right, my wife and children are here.
They go to school here,
and once every couple of weeks,
I'm back for a day or so.
Yeah, I usually get back, and, uh,
they just called a vote.
Let me go run over and vote.
Man: Do you think he's forgotten about you?
I think he might have just gone home.
Hello.
I know your government has been working on trying to do
a lot of cuts, because of the spending issue in the U.K.
Our mother thinks that David Cameron is a communist.
In what ways?
Georgie: 'Cause he was doing some things
with making gay marriage happen and things like that.
I'm not sure about all that sort of thing.
Aderholt: Well, if you stick to the traditional definition
of marriage, between one man and one woman,
then, you know, it really makes things a lot simpler.
If two men or two women want to get married,
what if three women and three men?
Poppy: Yeah, or a combination.
Or a combination.
And if you're to say it to all of the people
who want to get married that are gay,
"look, our main argument is that it's just simpler
for you not to get married," they'll probably understand.
Georgie: It's much simpler just to keep it
a man and a woman marry,
and the gay person organizes the wedding.
Yeah.
All right, I'm going to have to slip out to vote again.
I'll be back shortly.
Bit rude -- I was halfway through saying something.
[ "The star-spangled banner" plays ]
Everyone's been so boring!
I used to think it was Washington, "DA capital."
But I'm starting to think it's Washington, "dull club."
Poppy: Everywhere is the white house.
It's not even a nice building, it's just white.
Everything's the same color, isn't it,
in this place?
At least Caunty's got lots
of nice colors and stuff going on.
Yeah, there's different colors everywhere,
in the trees, in the grass, in the staff.
It's really pretty here.
We're going to see a frat house.
I think they might be a little less pretty,
a little more rambunctious fellows.
Narrator: Interested in academic life in the United States,
Poppy and Georgie are visiting a fraternity to meet a group
of students.
I mean, this is more of a rugby ball. That's a rugby ball.
Georgie: Yeah, in England, we say "football,"
because we use the feet.
How do you throw this, then?
Man: Here, you want me to go out?
Okay, the -- Poppy: Georgie!
Georgie: Throw it to me.
Man: You want to try to catch it?
Yeah.
All: Yay!
[ Glass shatters ]
Oh, my gosh!
Sorry!
Man: That's what I call good TV.
[ Laughs ]
Narrator: Poppy and Georgie move inside
for a tour of the living quarters.
Man: You're living with a bunch of guys, so...
I do not eat in here,
I don't come in here.
Oh, my gosh!
What's happened?
This is absolutely horrendous!
Is this part of your initiations to the frat,
you have to come and cook in here?
No, no.
It would be worse
if you had to come and eat in here.
Yeah.
Let's take a look up here.
It smells like in London,
when you walk past sort of reggae men.
Our grounds keeper has
a little plot of the garden where he just does it himself.
It smells a little bit like that.
His personal allotment.
This is good. I like this room.
It's very nice.
Yeah, it's a nice size.
Well done, well done.
Man: Where did you go to school?
Poppy: Do you know Oxford?
Do you know Cambridge?
Right, I went to a university just in the middle.
Best of both worlds.
Okay.
Okay, so we call this beer pong.
Each time you get it in the cup, they pull it away and drink it.
Why do you want to get the opposition drunk?
Is it because -- one of my uncles
always used to get Georgie drunk.
Georgie: Yeah.
You just want to win the game
so then you can keep playing.
Or just go up into the study with him for a bit.
[ Laughter ]
Sure.
In Eton, we used to play a game
called "[Bleep] or ball?"
Man: How did you play that?
It's -- you get a little bit drunk,
and then you take down your fly --
okay.
And all the other boys would gather round,
and you'd pull some skin from in there,
and they would have to guess, [Bleep] Or ball?
[ Laughter ] Oh!
Did you drink when you're wrong or when you're right?
No, that's not a drinking game -- you'd be drunk already,
and then play that.
Okay. Interesting.
Well, they seemed like a decent sort.
The house was a little bit crusty underfoot,
but you've really got to expect that
with no nanny around to bop things on the head with a spoon
when they come up to say hello.
Okay, quick round of [Bleep] or ball, and then --
[ laughter ]
Man: All right, Brett first!
Narrator: Poppy and Georgie are in Washington
on a tour of the U.S.
Having already met a United States congressman
and a body of students,
they're now in the Virginia countryside
to meet the grits...
Georgie Carlton, lovely to meet you.
Narrator: "Girls really into shooting."
Woman: Hi there!
Hello, Georgie Carlton, lovely to meet you.
Hello, Georgie, lovely to meet you, P.J.
Well, how lovely to be here.
How often do you do this?
P.J.: Every day.
Every day? Every day.
So we thought it would be fun
for them to shoot with you, Poppy,
and we need a good gun boy.
I can help out, I'm sure.
[ Laughter ]
This is a semiautomatic shotgun.
It is a .20 gauge,
and unloaded, and if the action were closed...
Did you just jump?
Georgie: That gave me a jump there.
This doesn't bode well.
Look at the number 11 machine.
Yeah.
And the catch phrase
to release the Clay target
is "pull." Okay.
Mimi is your dropper, right here.
Mimi: Right here.
She's got a magic button.
Poppy: Oh, remote control.
P.J.: Let's go for it. You ready?
Pull!
Both eyes open,
look at the target, target, now.
[ Cheering ]
There you go!
Georgie: Very good!
P.J.: Ready? Georgie: Yes.
P.J.: Pull.
Look at the target, target,
target, target, bang.
Whoo-hoo!
Got it!
Yay!
Hooray!
Men one, women one. [ Laughs ]
Poppy: It's not a competition -- unless I win.
P.J.: We are going to go up and try shooting
from the five stand --
that's what we call this.
I call it my shooting palace.
Each one of those stations, so five people can shoot.
Like Russian roulette.
No! [Laughs]
Oh, that's six people, isn't it?
Step right up.
Don't you worry about -- gather round.
Georgie: Is anyone joining me, or are you just
leaving the man on top by himself?
P.J.: Here we go. Look at it, look at it, look at it...
Whoo!
All right, here comes the other one,
here comes 11.
[ Shots firing ]
Good shot, Marge!
You got the Pete! Good shot!
Georgie: I'm coming, I'm coming!
You got the Pete!
Look at it, look at it, bang!
[ Shots fire ]
[ Cheering ]
Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
[ Cork pops ]
All: Whoo!
Trousers down and bottoms up!
Cheers.
Poppy: Cheers.
I've had an absolutely lovely time,
and I feel very privileged
to be a man let into the girls really into shooting.
Plus, I'm missing mother quite a lot, so it's lovely
just to have lots of ladies like her.
You just stepped over.
[ Laughs ] No, it's nice.
It's like the spice girls, but now.
Narrator: Tired of politics and tourism,
Poppy and Georgie have accepted an invitation
to attend an opera outside of town...
Bringing their father, lord Carlton, with them.
This would have been father's dream -- opera and America.
So, look, we brought him with us.
Look, daddy, opera!
♪ Look, daddy, opera ♪
Opera singing.
[ Horn honks ]
Narrator: As befits their social status,
they all have seats in the royal box.
[ Tenor singing aria ]
[ Soprano singing aria ]
[ Chorus singing ]
[ Applause ]
Poppy: Is that the end?
I don't know.
Narrator: After the performance, they go backstage
to attend the after-show party
as V.I.P. guests.
Georgie: Well, Poppy, who shall we speak to?
Poppy: Who do you want to?
I don't know.
Feels like we should mingle, if we're here.
Hello, I'm Georgie. Lovely to meet you.
This is my sister, Poppy.
Poppy: How do you do?
Did you like the opera?
Oh, yes, the lady was fabulous.
She's really good.
I remember seeing her.
I didn't fall asleep at all.
I was watching, yeah, yeah.
Georgie: I enjoyed it so much,
I needed to go to the toilet at the end,
and I held it in all the way through.
[Laughs] Yeah, yeah, exactly.
Poppy: We come from a really theatrical background.
Our mum really does a lot.
Our mother does a lot of amateur dramatics
and singing and musical theater and things like that.
I don't know if you know "Robben Island Blues."
She played Winnie Mandela.
Oh.
Nelson's wife. Yeah, it was marvelous.
It was absolutely marvelous.
That was quite tragic, as well.
Woman: Who's the designer of your dress?
Exotic.
Thank you so much.
Is it like Ita or something?
Georgie: She looks very,
very sexy, I think, yeah.
Yeah.
It's just nice to know there are things like this,
a nice group of sort of like-minded
white people who can get together
and have a nice evening.
Our father loved opera so much, we actually brought him with us.
Yeah.
He's just in here.
To watch, yeah.
Oh, no!
That's him there.
What's his name?
He was called George as well.
He's named after me.
George and Georgie?
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'd better put this away.
I don't want to spook anyone.
Oh, my God!
Georgie!
Sorry, sorry. Georgie!
He would be so annoyed with you!
You're always messing up.
If he saw that, he'd be
so angry with you!
Georgie: He does like opera. That is so typical!
Georgie: Sorry.
Georgie, he'd be so annoyed with you.
I know, he always said I was a failure.
He's on my dress! He's on my dress!
Man: The urn was on the table.
It fell, and these are the ashes.
Georgie's father, Georgie.
[ Tenor singing in background ]
Well, that was an absolutely marvelous, successful evening.
We've left a little piece of father there at the opera,
which is rather fitting, because he loved it.
I'm not sure which piece we left.
Hopefully the vocal cords.
Where are they?
I don't know -- all I know --
[ horn honks ]
There's our cab.
Excuse me.