1
00:00:02,018 --> 00:00:04,834
[Crow caws]
2
00:00:04,835 --> 00:00:06,014
Frankie: Since the dawn of time,
3
00:00:06,015 --> 00:00:07,893
there has been one truth about men...
4
00:00:07,894 --> 00:00:11,066
if they can toss it, pass
it, dribble it, or throw it,
5
00:00:11,067 --> 00:00:12,090
they will.
6
00:00:12,091 --> 00:00:13,835
- Heads up.
- I'm open.
7
00:00:13,836 --> 00:00:14,987
Frankie: Knock it off, guys.
8
00:00:14,988 --> 00:00:16,291
Stop throwing things in the house.
9
00:00:16,292 --> 00:00:18,267
Why'd you buy fruit if you
don't want us to throw it?
10
00:00:18,268 --> 00:00:19,035
I didn't buy it.
11
00:00:19,036 --> 00:00:20,389
I took it from the Holiday Inn lobby
12
00:00:20,390 --> 00:00:21,411
when I stopped to use the bathroom.
13
00:00:21,412 --> 00:00:22,161
Get open!
14
00:00:23,169 --> 00:00:25,209
Another son right over here!
15
00:00:25,210 --> 00:00:26,874
[Chuckling] Oh, yeah.
16
00:00:26,875 --> 00:00:28,289
Another spudsy check...
17
00:00:28,290 --> 00:00:31,025
going straight into savings
like the rest of them.
18
00:00:31,026 --> 00:00:34,001
Now I know why it's so important
to write down your goals...
19
00:00:34,002 --> 00:00:35,890
because if I didn't have the visual
20
00:00:35,891 --> 00:00:38,650
of the Sue-mometer
tracking my college savings,
21
00:00:38,651 --> 00:00:41,778
I could so easily have blown
this at the pillow pet kiosk.
22
00:00:41,779 --> 00:00:43,625
They have this cross-eyed dolphin
23
00:00:43,626 --> 00:00:45,748
that is the cutest thing you've ever seen.
24
00:00:45,749 --> 00:00:47,409
Mike: Way to stay strong, Sue.
25
00:00:47,410 --> 00:00:48,945
Yeah. Hey, look alive.
26
00:00:48,946 --> 00:00:51,380
Just trying to be a part of the family.
27
00:00:51,381 --> 00:00:54,281
Okay, so, that's $78 spudsy money,
28
00:00:54,282 --> 00:00:56,489
$25 babysitting and... hey!
29
00:00:56,490 --> 00:00:57,322
I found a dime!
30
00:00:57,323 --> 00:01:00,506
No. It's a button. But I needed a button!
31
00:01:00,507 --> 00:01:01,809
The year of Sue, baby!
32
00:01:01,810 --> 00:01:03,625
Oh, I am so proud of you, honey.
33
00:01:03,626 --> 00:01:04,897
And every little bit helps.
34
00:01:04,898 --> 00:01:06,097
Aah!
35
00:01:06,098 --> 00:01:07,529
Mike: Hey!
36
00:01:07,530 --> 00:01:08,673
You almost hit your sister.
37
00:01:08,674 --> 00:01:10,809
Don't worry. I'll get her next time.
38
00:01:10,810 --> 00:01:11,712
Look alive.
39
00:01:11,713 --> 00:01:12,784
Okay. No.
40
00:01:12,785 --> 00:01:15,080
Listen. Cut it out, you guys.
41
00:01:15,081 --> 00:01:16,616
You two are gonna break something.
42
00:01:16,617 --> 00:01:18,953
No more throwing in the kitchen, all right?
43
00:01:18,954 --> 00:01:20,944
You know fruit ball never ends well.
44
00:01:26,664 --> 00:01:28,131
Ahh! Aah!
45
00:01:28,132 --> 00:01:29,921
Ah! Oh, my God!
46
00:01:29,922 --> 00:01:31,373
Frankie: Here! Here!
47
00:01:31,374 --> 00:01:34,597
Get some... get something
big! Get something!
48
00:01:34,598 --> 00:01:35,657
Here! Here! Here! Here! Here! Here!
49
00:01:35,658 --> 00:01:36,979
Aah! Good!
50
00:01:36,980 --> 00:01:37,871
Turn it off!
51
00:01:37,872 --> 00:01:40,771
[Indistinct shouting]
52
00:01:40,772 --> 00:01:42,584
Come on! Somebody get over here!
53
00:01:43,647 --> 00:01:45,368
So, Sue, I called you in
54
00:01:45,369 --> 00:01:46,776
because I was going through your records,
55
00:01:46,777 --> 00:01:48,825
and I found a little "uh-oh!"
56
00:01:48,826 --> 00:01:50,737
"Uh-oh"?
57
00:01:50,738 --> 00:01:52,682
Yeah. Not to worry. It's nothing.
58
00:01:52,683 --> 00:01:54,746
It's just about you not
getting into college.
59
00:01:54,747 --> 00:01:56,195
Uh-oh.
60
00:01:56,196 --> 00:01:56,845
Yeah.
61
00:01:56,846 --> 00:02:00,645
I'm afraid you're short
a P.E. credit to graduate.
62
00:02:00,646 --> 00:02:03,820
But I shouldn't be short.
I did wrestlerettes.
63
00:02:03,821 --> 00:02:06,565
Extracurricular sports
count for one credit.
64
00:02:06,566 --> 00:02:09,492
Oh, that's right. I forgot
you did wrestlerettes.
65
00:02:09,493 --> 00:02:11,692
That would certainly give
you your missing credit...
66
00:02:11,693 --> 00:02:14,087
If it wasn't a pretend sport.
67
00:02:14,088 --> 00:02:16,388
What do you mean, "pretend sport"?
68
00:02:16,389 --> 00:02:18,981
Why does cheerleading
count, but not wrestlerettes?
69
00:02:18,982 --> 00:02:20,749
We do everything they do,
70
00:02:20,750 --> 00:02:22,565
and we do it in homemade uniforms
71
00:02:22,566 --> 00:02:24,141
in front of confused crowds.
72
00:02:24,142 --> 00:02:27,044
Sue, I don't want you to
get stressed out about this.
73
00:02:27,045 --> 00:02:29,909
Every senior gets worried
they're not gonna graduate.
74
00:02:32,172 --> 00:02:33,972
Are you saying I'm not gonna graduate?
75
00:02:33,973 --> 00:02:35,568
Oh, no! [Chuckles]
76
00:02:35,569 --> 00:02:37,715
Not without P.E., no, won't.
77
00:02:37,716 --> 00:02:40,018
But I'm applying to colleges.
78
00:02:40,019 --> 00:02:41,572
There's a Sue-mometer.
79
00:02:41,573 --> 00:02:43,939
I already planned how
I'm gonna thank my parents
80
00:02:43,940 --> 00:02:45,560
on the top of my graduation cap.
81
00:02:45,561 --> 00:02:48,231
Okay, now, don't you worry.
We'll get you all fixed up...
82
00:02:48,232 --> 00:02:49,644
- [Keys clacking]
- ... Unless we can't.
83
00:02:49,645 --> 00:02:51,140
[Chuckles] Okay.
84
00:02:51,141 --> 00:02:53,323
Now, you're a couple months behind,
85
00:02:53,324 --> 00:02:55,803
but we can slip you out of study hall
86
00:02:55,804 --> 00:02:58,340
and slide you right into
coach tink Babbit's P.E. class.
87
00:02:58,341 --> 00:03:00,142
Really? That'll do it?
88
00:03:00,143 --> 00:03:02,510
I'll switch the classes
and I'll get the credit
89
00:03:02,511 --> 00:03:03,854
and everything will be fine?
90
00:03:03,855 --> 00:03:06,230
Yep, not to worry.
Everything will be just fine.
91
00:03:07,559 --> 00:03:08,782
Fingers crossed.
92
00:03:10,815 --> 00:03:13,831
[Guitar playing rock music]
93
00:03:13,832 --> 00:03:15,351
[Music stops]
94
00:03:15,352 --> 00:03:17,655
Oh. I'm sorry. I didn't
know you wanted to die.
95
00:03:17,656 --> 00:03:19,903
I'm gonna die anyway, so
you might as well kill me.
96
00:03:19,904 --> 00:03:22,288
I'm intrigued. You can have one minute.
97
00:03:23,688 --> 00:03:25,311
I broke dad's lawn mower.
98
00:03:25,312 --> 00:03:26,970
I'll start writing your funeral song now.
99
00:03:26,971 --> 00:03:28,786
Plug me back in! Look, I came to you
100
00:03:28,787 --> 00:03:29,708
because, of all the family,
101
00:03:29,709 --> 00:03:31,012
you're the most evil and conniving.
102
00:03:31,013 --> 00:03:33,676
Ooh! Flattery! I'll give
you 20 extra seconds.
103
00:03:33,677 --> 00:03:36,525
Wait. Why were you even
near dad's lawn mower?
104
00:03:36,526 --> 00:03:38,332
[Sighs] I was gonna impress Cindy
105
00:03:38,333 --> 00:03:39,506
by driving it past her house.
106
00:03:39,507 --> 00:03:40,751
Pbht. Okay.
107
00:03:40,752 --> 00:03:43,049
There's a lot of issues to
deal with in that statement,
108
00:03:43,050 --> 00:03:45,005
but first let's deal with the lawn mower,
109
00:03:45,006 --> 00:03:46,812
then we'll circle back
to your lack of game.
110
00:03:46,813 --> 00:03:47,353
Go on.
111
00:03:47,354 --> 00:03:48,982
Well, the lawn mower wouldn't start,
112
00:03:48,983 --> 00:03:50,566
so I opened the lid thing,
113
00:03:50,567 --> 00:03:52,373
smacked it with my fist like dad does,
114
00:03:52,374 --> 00:03:54,695
but when I did, I smacked
the key out of my hand
115
00:03:54,696 --> 00:03:55,853
and down into the engine.
116
00:03:55,854 --> 00:03:58,878
I could see it, so I poked around
to see if I could fish it out,
117
00:03:58,879 --> 00:04:01,048
but I think I might have made things worse.
118
00:04:06,192 --> 00:04:07,969
Easy. Just blame the Glossners.
119
00:04:07,970 --> 00:04:09,089
If only.
120
00:04:09,090 --> 00:04:11,753
One of the things I jammed
in there was a bookmark.
121
00:04:11,754 --> 00:04:12,921
Aw, Brick, seriously?
122
00:04:12,922 --> 00:04:15,264
That's like the penguin
leaving his umbrella.
123
00:04:15,265 --> 00:04:17,449
I know. Dad's gonna kill me.
124
00:04:17,450 --> 00:04:19,185
He's already mad about the sink.
125
00:04:19,186 --> 00:04:20,720
Add wrecking his lawn mower to the mix,
126
00:04:20,721 --> 00:04:22,192
and who knows what he's gonna do?
127
00:04:22,193 --> 00:04:24,114
Ooh. Hang on. Hang on.
128
00:04:24,115 --> 00:04:25,210
I think I can help you.
129
00:04:25,211 --> 00:04:27,777
I was saving this one for myself
in case I ever got in trouble,
130
00:04:27,778 --> 00:04:30,824
but, uh, I'm crazy responsible
now, so I'll never need it.
131
00:04:30,825 --> 00:04:32,737
Here's what you're gonna
do. You take dad's wallet.
132
00:04:32,738 --> 00:04:34,532
He'll go nuts looking for
it, think somebody stole it.
133
00:04:34,533 --> 00:04:36,189
Then, when he discovers the lawn mower
134
00:04:36,190 --> 00:04:37,147
and starts to get mad about it,
135
00:04:37,148 --> 00:04:38,671
you run in, say you found his wallet.
136
00:04:38,672 --> 00:04:39,496
You're the big hero.
137
00:04:39,497 --> 00:04:41,180
He can't get mad at you for the lawn mower.
138
00:04:41,181 --> 00:04:42,135
You're welcome.
139
00:04:42,136 --> 00:04:44,255
Now, uh, I'm gonna play you off.
140
00:04:44,256 --> 00:04:45,456
[Sighs]
141
00:04:47,489 --> 00:04:49,033
Oh, wait, wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait, wait.
142
00:04:49,034 --> 00:04:49,932
You're not gonna blow it
143
00:04:49,933 --> 00:04:51,858
with your whole "I'm lying" thing, are you?
144
00:04:51,859 --> 00:04:53,400
Oh, I outgrew that.
145
00:04:53,401 --> 00:04:55,264
Now I just fart when I
lie, but nobody notices.
146
00:04:55,265 --> 00:04:57,441
Mm. That Cindy's a lucky gal.
147
00:05:00,089 --> 00:05:01,933
Well, we've still got a sink.
148
00:05:01,934 --> 00:05:03,068
It's just down there.
149
00:05:03,069 --> 00:05:05,869
The faucet lines and the lines
to the dishwasher are busted.
150
00:05:05,870 --> 00:05:07,573
Ugh, not the dishwasher.
151
00:05:07,574 --> 00:05:09,358
I loved the dishwasher.
152
00:05:09,671 --> 00:05:12,582
[Sighs] It's a huge job, Frankie.
153
00:05:12,583 --> 00:05:14,991
I'm scared to start pulling threads here.
154
00:05:14,992 --> 00:05:16,333
I start taking that counter apart,
155
00:05:16,334 --> 00:05:18,469
and next thing you know,
the garage door won't open.
156
00:05:18,470 --> 00:05:19,485
Okay, hear me out.
157
00:05:19,486 --> 00:05:23,789
It's only a huge job... If we fix it.
158
00:05:23,790 --> 00:05:24,686
What are you talking about?
159
00:05:24,687 --> 00:05:27,078
Listen, if the sink is at all functional,
160
00:05:27,079 --> 00:05:28,511
we don't have to spend the money.
161
00:05:28,512 --> 00:05:31,261
We'll just plug, patch, and
work around what's broken.
162
00:05:31,262 --> 00:05:33,581
Isn't that what we've been
doing for the past 20 years?
163
00:05:33,582 --> 00:05:36,102
We're starting to run out
of things to work around.
164
00:05:36,103 --> 00:05:37,281
This sucks, Frankie.
165
00:05:37,282 --> 00:05:39,791
No matter what kind of Frankie
spin you put on it, it sucks.
166
00:05:39,792 --> 00:05:41,526
No. You know what sucks, Mike?
167
00:05:41,527 --> 00:05:44,638
That poor guy in Muncie who's
just sitting in his recliner
168
00:05:44,639 --> 00:05:47,166
when the ground opens up
and swallows his house.
169
00:05:47,167 --> 00:05:49,624
Okay, yes, there's a hole
where our sink used to be,
170
00:05:49,625 --> 00:05:52,024
but I'd rather have a sink hole in my house
171
00:05:52,025 --> 00:05:53,269
than my house in a sinkhole.
172
00:05:53,270 --> 00:05:54,069
You sure?
173
00:05:54,070 --> 00:05:55,965
I'm kind of jealous he
got to sit in his recliner.
174
00:05:55,966 --> 00:05:58,723
[Door opens, closes]
175
00:05:58,724 --> 00:06:02,811
Well, you will not believe
what happened to me today.
176
00:06:02,812 --> 00:06:04,535
Not if it's something good, we won't.
177
00:06:04,536 --> 00:06:07,963
I met with my college
counselor at lunch today,
178
00:06:07,964 --> 00:06:10,028
and she told me that
wrestlerettes doesn't count
179
00:06:10,029 --> 00:06:13,499
for a P.E. credit because I "made it up."
180
00:06:13,500 --> 00:06:15,220
Well, you did kind of make it up.
181
00:06:15,221 --> 00:06:17,557
Yeah, but everything was
made up at some point...
182
00:06:17,558 --> 00:06:20,790
soccer, rugby, golf.
183
00:06:20,791 --> 00:06:22,879
Golf? What even is that?
184
00:06:22,880 --> 00:06:26,199
Wait. Is she saying this is
gonna delay your graduating?
185
00:06:26,200 --> 00:06:27,829
College or not, let me know.
186
00:06:27,830 --> 00:06:30,365
It'll decide if I use copper
or duct tape down here.
187
00:06:30,366 --> 00:06:32,670
Oh, I am graduating.
188
00:06:32,671 --> 00:06:35,498
I-I will go to P.E. I
will do whatever it takes.
189
00:06:35,499 --> 00:06:37,902
But if they give me any pushback,
190
00:06:37,903 --> 00:06:39,985
I will start throwing some serious
191
00:06:39,986 --> 00:06:41,658
sergeant-at-arms weight around.
192
00:06:41,659 --> 00:06:43,074
Yep.
193
00:06:43,075 --> 00:06:46,510
Sometimes it's good to be the
kid nobody pays attention to.
194
00:06:48,418 --> 00:06:50,822
Everyone thinks gym's an easy "A,"
195
00:06:50,823 --> 00:06:53,662
all you got to do is show
up and put on your shorts.
196
00:06:53,663 --> 00:06:56,001
I mean, you do have to put on your shorts.
197
00:06:56,002 --> 00:06:57,445
It's 10% of your grade.
198
00:06:57,446 --> 00:06:58,550
But if you want an "A,"
199
00:06:58,551 --> 00:07:02,551
you're gonna have to earn it... earn it.
200
00:07:02,552 --> 00:07:04,068
Don't you worry, Coach Babbit.
201
00:07:04,069 --> 00:07:05,594
I will do whatever it takes.
202
00:07:05,595 --> 00:07:07,044
Well, it's gonna take a lot.
203
00:07:07,045 --> 00:07:09,763
We're right in the middle
of our unit on tinikling.
204
00:07:09,764 --> 00:07:11,452
What's tinikling?
205
00:07:11,453 --> 00:07:13,093
Ugh. You're kidding, right?
206
00:07:14,880 --> 00:07:19,132
[Hands and sticks clapping rhythmically]
207
00:07:19,133 --> 00:07:21,381
So long as you're coordinated,
it should be no problem.
208
00:07:21,382 --> 00:07:24,097
Okay, people, let's hustle!
209
00:07:24,098 --> 00:07:27,451
[Clapping continues]
210
00:07:33,676 --> 00:07:35,744
[Water running]
211
00:07:40,650 --> 00:07:43,051
Okay, you can turn it off!
212
00:07:43,052 --> 00:07:44,686
- [Knob squeaks]
- Thanks, Nancy!
213
00:07:44,687 --> 00:07:45,565
Nancy: No problem!
214
00:07:45,996 --> 00:07:47,297
You seen my wallet?
215
00:07:47,298 --> 00:07:49,547
- Oh, no.
- Oh, yes.
216
00:07:49,548 --> 00:07:50,548
I can't find my wallet.
217
00:07:50,549 --> 00:07:53,774
I checked my car, my
desk. I-it's not anywhere.
218
00:07:53,775 --> 00:07:55,722
Are you sure you didn't go on
one of your cleaning binges,
219
00:07:55,723 --> 00:07:57,208
where everything ends
up in a different drawer?
220
00:07:57,209 --> 00:07:58,632
[Chuckling] Oh, you got me.
221
00:07:58,633 --> 00:08:00,164
Place looks amazing, doesn't it?
222
00:08:00,165 --> 00:08:01,229
It's really coming together.
223
00:08:01,230 --> 00:08:03,957
Damn it. All my credit cards
are in there, my license.
224
00:08:03,958 --> 00:08:05,301
I've had that wallet since I was a kid.
225
00:08:05,302 --> 00:08:06,238
I love that wallet.
226
00:08:06,239 --> 00:08:07,719
It's one of the only things I care about.
227
00:08:07,720 --> 00:08:09,958
Oh... I said "one of the only."
228
00:08:09,959 --> 00:08:11,270
Well, where did you have it last?
229
00:08:11,271 --> 00:08:13,125
[Sighs] That is the
world's stupidest question.
230
00:08:13,126 --> 00:08:14,420
If I knew, I'd have it.
231
00:08:14,421 --> 00:08:16,485
Don't get mad at me.
I'm just trying to help.
232
00:08:16,486 --> 00:08:17,964
Well, you're not helping.
233
00:08:17,965 --> 00:08:19,852
This is nuts. I don't lose stuff.
234
00:08:19,853 --> 00:08:21,239
You're the one who loses stuff.
235
00:08:21,240 --> 00:08:23,422
Hey, I don't lose things
any more than anybody else.
236
00:08:23,423 --> 00:08:25,623
Really? Where's the blue bag, Frankie?
237
00:08:25,624 --> 00:08:26,677
It's not lost.
238
00:08:26,678 --> 00:08:28,628
We had it when we were at Disney World.
239
00:08:28,629 --> 00:08:30,516
And it's around here somewhere.
240
00:08:30,517 --> 00:08:33,021
[Birds squawking]
241
00:08:33,825 --> 00:08:36,093
Your keys, the checkbook, your sunglasses,
242
00:08:36,094 --> 00:08:39,096
the remote, the keys, the
snack bag, your keys...
243
00:08:39,097 --> 00:08:41,022
oh, and... don't you say my car.
244
00:08:41,023 --> 00:08:41,868
Did you not lose your car?
245
00:08:41,869 --> 00:08:44,272
Okay, you promised we weren't
gonna bring that up again.
246
00:08:44,273 --> 00:08:45,452
I admitted it was stupid,
247
00:08:45,453 --> 00:08:46,168
- but do we have to...
- I don't even care about that anymore.
248
00:08:46,169 --> 00:08:46,840
- What I care about is my wallet.
- Do you want me to help
249
00:08:46,841 --> 00:08:47,654
you find your wallet?
250
00:08:47,655 --> 00:08:50,435
Whoa. Getting pretty heated in there.
251
00:08:50,436 --> 00:08:51,907
You're not gonna crack, are you?
252
00:08:51,908 --> 00:08:53,156
Are you kidding me?
253
00:08:53,157 --> 00:08:54,795
I've never felt so alive.
254
00:08:54,796 --> 00:08:55,636
Mm.
255
00:08:56,836 --> 00:09:01,749
[Hands and sticks clapping rhythmically]
256
00:09:01,750 --> 00:09:03,302
This is a nightmare.
257
00:09:03,303 --> 00:09:05,509
How does she expect us
to be able to do this?
258
00:09:05,510 --> 00:09:08,268
One week to the final, ladies.
259
00:09:08,269 --> 00:09:12,325
You got to make it through your
entire routine, or you fail.
260
00:09:12,326 --> 00:09:15,215
A snapped ankle is no excuse.
261
00:09:15,216 --> 00:09:17,781
You can't tank tinikling,
not on tink's time.
262
00:09:17,782 --> 00:09:19,570
Heck, get in there!
263
00:09:19,571 --> 00:09:21,226
"Wow" us!
264
00:09:21,227 --> 00:09:28,110
[Clapping continues]
265
00:09:28,938 --> 00:09:30,032
Ugh!
266
00:09:40,668 --> 00:09:41,905
Oh!
267
00:09:42,540 --> 00:09:44,142
I thought I told you that's creepy!
268
00:09:44,143 --> 00:09:46,245
Slight snag with the plan.
269
00:09:46,246 --> 00:09:47,973
I seem to have misplaced dad's wallet.
270
00:09:47,974 --> 00:09:49,415
What are you talking about?
271
00:09:49,416 --> 00:09:51,982
Well, I hid it between the
pages of "A Tale of Two Cities,"
272
00:09:51,983 --> 00:09:55,023
but that was too obvious,
so I moved it somewhere.
273
00:09:55,024 --> 00:09:56,257
Long story short,
274
00:09:56,258 --> 00:09:57,609
"A Tale of Two Cities" still holds up,
275
00:09:57,610 --> 00:09:59,456
and I can't seem to find the wallet.
276
00:09:59,457 --> 00:10:00,601
You've lost dad's wallet
277
00:10:00,602 --> 00:10:01,794
and you've read a book
you already read before?
278
00:10:01,795 --> 00:10:03,560
Those are two of the dumbest
things you've ever done, Brick.
279
00:10:03,561 --> 00:10:04,986
Good news, though...
280
00:10:04,987 --> 00:10:07,210
to make up for the wallet,
I stole his car keys.
281
00:10:07,211 --> 00:10:08,201
You did what?!
282
00:10:08,202 --> 00:10:11,005
Oh, I never should have
wasted my plan on you!
283
00:10:11,006 --> 00:10:13,040
I should have given it to
some kid from the Inner City
284
00:10:13,041 --> 00:10:14,873
who could have used it to
make a better life for himself.
285
00:10:14,874 --> 00:10:17,209
Frankie: Guys, get in here!
286
00:10:17,210 --> 00:10:18,114
Breakfast!
287
00:10:21,790 --> 00:10:24,137
I'm losing my mind. Now
I can't find my keys.
288
00:10:24,138 --> 00:10:26,705
Oh, no. Did you check the sink hole?
289
00:10:26,706 --> 00:10:28,519
Really not something
people should have to say.
290
00:10:31,643 --> 00:10:32,590
Hey, hey, hey, hey!
291
00:10:32,591 --> 00:10:35,215
I told you... not out of
a glass, out of the carton.
292
00:10:35,216 --> 00:10:37,671
My back is killing me
from doing floor dishes.
293
00:10:37,672 --> 00:10:39,525
We're using minimal dishes, people.
294
00:10:39,526 --> 00:10:41,840
No unnecessary dishes!
295
00:10:41,841 --> 00:10:43,277
Breakfast!
296
00:10:45,789 --> 00:10:47,321
Move over. I need to get to school.
297
00:10:48,120 --> 00:10:50,353
No. Hey, no skimming!
298
00:10:50,354 --> 00:10:53,491
Axl's skimming the top so he can
get all the marshmallow charms.
299
00:10:53,492 --> 00:10:54,537
He's gonna get all the luck.
300
00:10:54,538 --> 00:10:56,095
We're drinking from a hose, Brick.
301
00:10:56,096 --> 00:10:57,225
That ship has sailed.
302
00:10:57,226 --> 00:10:58,360
I said move!
303
00:10:58,361 --> 00:11:00,992
I need to get there early so
I can practice my tinikling
304
00:11:00,993 --> 00:11:03,430
so I can pass P.E. so I can get to college
305
00:11:03,431 --> 00:11:05,689
so I can be the generation
that does better than my parents
306
00:11:05,690 --> 00:11:07,820
because apparently my entire future depends
307
00:11:07,821 --> 00:11:10,415
on whether I can jump through
a couple of frickin' sticks!
308
00:11:10,416 --> 00:11:12,060
Ugh. Gah.
309
00:11:12,061 --> 00:11:14,812
Have you ever thought of
asking to be the stick person
310
00:11:14,813 --> 00:11:17,046
instead of the dancing,
tripping, falling person?
311
00:11:20,149 --> 00:11:22,960
[Hands and sticks clapping rhythmically]
312
00:11:22,961 --> 00:11:24,079
Aah! Sorry!
313
00:11:25,148 --> 00:11:26,311
[Gasps]
314
00:11:27,058 --> 00:11:28,830
Ooh. Sorry.
315
00:11:30,074 --> 00:11:32,467
Really, really sorry.
316
00:11:43,450 --> 00:11:45,143
Can I make one small request?
317
00:11:45,144 --> 00:11:46,919
Now that we're washing dishes in the tub,
318
00:11:46,920 --> 00:11:48,104
can we not have spaghetti?
319
00:11:48,105 --> 00:11:49,039
[Sighs]
320
00:11:49,040 --> 00:11:51,232
I told Brick to scrape them first.
321
00:11:51,233 --> 00:11:52,406
What was he, raised in a barn?
322
00:11:53,514 --> 00:11:56,118
Ooh, dad, wait. I need your
help with my P.E. homework.
323
00:11:56,119 --> 00:11:58,035
Can you do the other end
of the sticks with mom?
324
00:11:58,036 --> 00:11:59,852
I'm on my way to mow the lawn.
325
00:11:59,853 --> 00:12:02,399
We can't be the house
with no sink and no yard,
326
00:12:02,400 --> 00:12:04,346
or we're treading into Glossner territory.
327
00:12:04,347 --> 00:12:06,522
Nice try. You haven't
mowed the lawn in a week,
328
00:12:06,523 --> 00:12:07,990
and now all of a sudden, you have to do it?
329
00:12:07,991 --> 00:12:10,359
If I'm tinikling, you're tinikling.
330
00:12:10,360 --> 00:12:11,175
Get down here.
331
00:12:12,207 --> 00:12:14,650
Okay, so, it's twice on the ground,
332
00:12:14,651 --> 00:12:16,192
then once together, then the same again,
333
00:12:16,193 --> 00:12:18,009
then the next time, once on the ground,
334
00:12:18,010 --> 00:12:19,775
then together, then back to twice,
335
00:12:19,776 --> 00:12:20,864
and I dance through it.
336
00:12:20,865 --> 00:12:22,750
- Got it?
- This is P.E. now?
337
00:12:22,751 --> 00:12:24,756
What happened to singling out the weaklings
338
00:12:24,757 --> 00:12:26,100
and nailing them with a ball?
339
00:12:26,101 --> 00:12:27,122
All right, come on.
340
00:12:27,123 --> 00:12:28,831
One, one, two.
341
00:12:28,832 --> 00:12:30,792
One, one, two.
342
00:12:30,793 --> 00:12:32,969
One, one... no, two.
343
00:12:32,970 --> 00:12:35,585
Mike, you got to feel the rhythm.
You're not feeling the rhythm.
344
00:12:35,586 --> 00:12:37,819
Hey, you got me slapping
sticks against the floor.
345
00:12:37,820 --> 00:12:38,595
You get what you get.
346
00:12:38,596 --> 00:12:40,828
Okay, now dad's going faster
because he's getting mad.
347
00:12:40,829 --> 00:12:42,582
I'm not getting mad. Just go, Sue!
348
00:12:42,583 --> 00:12:44,535
Okay, okay, okay. I'm going in.
349
00:12:45,648 --> 00:12:47,125
Ohh. Dah!
350
00:12:47,126 --> 00:12:48,429
Well, it's harder than it looks.
351
00:12:50,370 --> 00:12:52,116
Oh, ho!
352
00:12:54,403 --> 00:12:55,424
Hoo!
353
00:12:56,168 --> 00:12:57,398
Hee!
354
00:12:58,200 --> 00:13:00,260
Stop being good at everything!
355
00:13:00,261 --> 00:13:01,917
Axl: Tell the sun to stop shining!
356
00:13:13,679 --> 00:13:15,094
Axl, dad's about to mow the lawn
357
00:13:15,095 --> 00:13:16,928
and I can't find his wallet or his keys.
358
00:13:16,929 --> 00:13:19,336
Oh, God, why did I ever listen to you?
359
00:13:19,337 --> 00:13:22,095
Hey, stealing dad's wallet,
then returning it to him
360
00:13:22,096 --> 00:13:23,807
to become a hero was a rock-solid plan.
361
00:13:23,808 --> 00:13:25,615
If you can't pull that off, that's on you.
362
00:13:25,616 --> 00:13:26,800
I should never have done this.
363
00:13:26,801 --> 00:13:28,262
I'm not cut out for a life of crime.
364
00:13:28,263 --> 00:13:29,358
I don't have your deviousness.
365
00:13:29,359 --> 00:13:31,606
Or my good looks, but let's
not start naming everything,
366
00:13:31,607 --> 00:13:32,542
or we'll be here all day.
367
00:13:32,543 --> 00:13:34,702
Okay, where did you have them last?
368
00:13:34,703 --> 00:13:37,032
Why do people ask that?
If I knew, I'd have them.
369
00:13:40,438 --> 00:13:42,222
Hey! Dad's wallet!
370
00:13:42,223 --> 00:13:44,077
All this time, I thought it was my wallet.
371
00:13:44,078 --> 00:13:45,653
But wait... I don't have a wallet.
372
00:13:45,654 --> 00:13:47,617
I'd like a wallet, but I
wouldn't keep it in this pocket
373
00:13:47,618 --> 00:13:48,594
'cause I'd forget about it,
374
00:13:48,595 --> 00:13:50,036
so I would put it in this pocket.
375
00:13:50,037 --> 00:13:51,916
Oh! Keys!
376
00:13:51,917 --> 00:13:54,352
Mike: Brick, get in here now!
377
00:13:54,353 --> 00:13:56,284
- Uh-oh.
- [Singsong voice] Show time.
378
00:13:56,285 --> 00:13:59,033
You're on. Now, uh, remember...
whatever happens in there,
379
00:13:59,034 --> 00:14:01,554
you and me... Do not know each other.
380
00:14:06,446 --> 00:14:07,852
Brick, you want to explain
381
00:14:07,853 --> 00:14:10,593
what this was doing in my lawn
mower and why it's not working now?
382
00:14:10,594 --> 00:14:12,598
Looks like somebody who
was told not to touch it...
383
00:14:12,599 --> 00:14:13,456
I found your wallet.
384
00:14:14,120 --> 00:14:15,752
- What? You're kidding?
- Hey!
385
00:14:15,753 --> 00:14:17,841
I've been looking everywhere
for this. Where'd you find it?
386
00:14:18,452 --> 00:14:21,725
By the mailbox... In the grass.
387
00:14:21,726 --> 00:14:23,717
I know everyone else kind of gave up,
388
00:14:23,718 --> 00:14:24,703
but I stuck with it
389
00:14:24,704 --> 00:14:26,606
'cause I knew how important
it was to you, dad.
390
00:14:26,607 --> 00:14:29,198
Huh. It was just laying
there in the grass, huh?
391
00:14:29,199 --> 00:14:32,263
Yes. Yes, it was.
392
00:14:32,264 --> 00:14:35,423
Huh. Well... [Sniffs]
393
00:14:36,692 --> 00:14:38,141
Well, thanks, Brick.
394
00:14:38,142 --> 00:14:39,652
[Sniffs]
395
00:14:39,653 --> 00:14:41,493
I was just about to cancel
all these credit cards.
396
00:14:41,494 --> 00:14:42,504
No problem, dad.
397
00:14:42,505 --> 00:14:44,127
Oh, and I found your keys, too.
398
00:14:44,128 --> 00:14:45,602
Wait. You found my keys, too?
399
00:14:45,603 --> 00:14:47,388
- [Chuckles]
- Yes.
400
00:14:47,389 --> 00:14:48,557
Yes, I did.
401
00:14:48,558 --> 00:14:50,267
[Sniffs]
402
00:14:50,268 --> 00:14:51,427
Where'd you find them?
403
00:14:52,531 --> 00:14:53,308
Well, I...
404
00:14:53,309 --> 00:14:54,298
Axl: Brick, don't answer that!
405
00:14:54,299 --> 00:14:56,538
For the love of God, dad,
stop asking him questions.
406
00:14:56,539 --> 00:14:59,330
I just mean... the point
is you got them back,
407
00:14:59,331 --> 00:15:01,534
so, uh, who cares about
anything else, right?
408
00:15:03,105 --> 00:15:05,221
Hmm. Well, let me check to see
if everything is still here.
409
00:15:05,222 --> 00:15:06,429
Ah!
410
00:15:06,430 --> 00:15:07,872
The credit card that's making payments
411
00:15:07,873 --> 00:15:09,384
on the other two credit
cards... still here.
412
00:15:09,385 --> 00:15:10,501
That's good.
413
00:15:11,373 --> 00:15:12,527
Oh, come on.
414
00:15:12,528 --> 00:15:14,079
This is the picture you have of me?
415
00:15:14,080 --> 00:15:16,663
I look so happy. You got
to get a newer picture.
416
00:15:16,664 --> 00:15:18,181
[Scoffs] Oh, hilarious.
417
00:15:18,182 --> 00:15:19,572
You have a blockbuster card.
418
00:15:19,573 --> 00:15:21,134
Hey, get out of my wallet.
419
00:15:21,135 --> 00:15:23,629
Uh, Mike, why is there a picture
420
00:15:23,630 --> 00:15:25,543
of Jeannie Phillips behind mine?
421
00:15:25,544 --> 00:15:26,486
We used to go out.
422
00:15:26,487 --> 00:15:27,990
Yeah, I know... in high school.
423
00:15:27,991 --> 00:15:29,165
- What?!
- Classic. Let's see!
424
00:15:29,166 --> 00:15:30,521
- Really?
- Come on. Get out of my stuff.
425
00:15:30,522 --> 00:15:33,876
Whoa, dad. Hot. Really
fills out a Jean vest. Hmm?
426
00:15:33,877 --> 00:15:35,774
I can't believe you've had another woman
427
00:15:35,775 --> 00:15:37,710
against your butt cheek
for all these years.
428
00:15:37,711 --> 00:15:41,016
To think... every time I've
taken money out of his wallet,
429
00:15:41,017 --> 00:15:43,679
there was another mom lurking in there.
430
00:15:43,680 --> 00:15:45,015
Look, it doesn't mean anything
431
00:15:45,016 --> 00:15:47,094
other than I'm too lazy
to clean out my wallet.
432
00:15:47,095 --> 00:15:48,935
I'm with you, dad. It's
good to have a backup.
433
00:15:48,936 --> 00:15:50,582
Look, you should take it out, Mike.
434
00:15:50,583 --> 00:15:51,695
That's what people do.
435
00:15:51,696 --> 00:15:53,188
What if you got in an accident
436
00:15:53,189 --> 00:15:54,638
and they're looking through your wallet
437
00:15:54,639 --> 00:15:56,182
and they're like, "which one is his wife?"
438
00:15:56,183 --> 00:15:57,511
"I don't know. Which one is she?"
439
00:15:57,512 --> 00:15:59,137
Who do you want picking
you up from the hospital?
440
00:15:59,138 --> 00:16:00,940
Nobody. Just let me die in peace.
441
00:16:00,941 --> 00:16:02,844
Hey, dad, where's the picture of me?
442
00:16:02,845 --> 00:16:07,493
You got mom, other mom, Axl, Brick,
443
00:16:07,494 --> 00:16:12,036
Axl and Brick, and limestone,
the dead quarry cat?
444
00:16:12,037 --> 00:16:14,594
Huh. Why do you have a
"Reservoir Dogs" ticket stub?
445
00:16:14,595 --> 00:16:17,282
B-because it's... it's
meaningful to me, okay?
446
00:16:17,283 --> 00:16:19,603
I'm below a stub?!
447
00:16:19,604 --> 00:16:22,246
Hey, he has a punch card
to the good ice cream store.
448
00:16:22,247 --> 00:16:24,188
You never let us go to the gelato barn
449
00:16:24,189 --> 00:16:25,562
because you say it's too expensive.
450
00:16:25,563 --> 00:16:28,316
He's one punch away from a
leaning tower of pistachio.
451
00:16:28,317 --> 00:16:31,443
Enough, all of you! Stay out of my stuff.
452
00:16:31,444 --> 00:16:33,673
A man's wallet is private.
Don't mess with that.
453
00:16:33,674 --> 00:16:34,587
That's our will.
454
00:16:34,588 --> 00:16:36,360
[Gasps] This is the death napkin?!
455
00:16:36,361 --> 00:16:37,861
- I don't want to see it.
- I want to see it.
456
00:16:37,862 --> 00:16:39,406
Hey! That's not for you guys.
457
00:16:39,407 --> 00:16:40,820
That napkin's for the lawyers.
458
00:16:40,821 --> 00:16:42,639
Wait. The death napkin's from Chi-Chi's?
459
00:16:42,640 --> 00:16:46,132
Hmm, I expected it from somewhere
with a little more gravitas.
460
00:16:46,133 --> 00:16:47,229
Come on! Let me see!
461
00:16:47,230 --> 00:16:48,273
You guys are gonna kick it soon,
462
00:16:48,274 --> 00:16:50,503
and since I'll be in charge,
I don't want any surprises.
463
00:16:50,504 --> 00:16:52,026
There's no money. Surprise!
464
00:16:52,027 --> 00:16:54,674
Can we just put the scary napkin away?
465
00:16:54,675 --> 00:16:57,090
We are children. We're not
supposed to be seeing this.
466
00:16:57,091 --> 00:16:58,445
I want to see it! I want
to know what I'll get!
467
00:16:58,446 --> 00:17:00,932
Mom said this is not for us.
468
00:17:00,933 --> 00:17:02,811
Mom's not in charge anymore! She's dead!
469
00:17:02,812 --> 00:17:04,292
- Okay.
- Hey. No. Axl.
470
00:17:04,293 --> 00:17:05,562
Hey, knock it off.
471
00:17:07,280 --> 00:17:08,637
[Sighs]
472
00:17:10,185 --> 00:17:11,996
[Milk dripping]
473
00:17:11,997 --> 00:17:13,702
Why is this still here?
474
00:17:13,703 --> 00:17:15,078
Whose job was it to shower
475
00:17:15,079 --> 00:17:16,565
with the big cereal bowl this morning?
476
00:17:16,566 --> 00:17:19,064
No. This is horrible. Now there's no will.
477
00:17:19,065 --> 00:17:20,242
What did it say?
478
00:17:20,243 --> 00:17:22,319
It doesn't really matter
what it said about me.
479
00:17:22,320 --> 00:17:24,118
I imagine it was gonna be revised anyway
480
00:17:24,119 --> 00:17:26,003
to reflect that I'm the
finder of the wallet.
481
00:17:26,004 --> 00:17:27,898
Okay, all of you, take it down a notch.
482
00:17:27,899 --> 00:17:29,341
Your mom and I aren't going anywhere.
483
00:17:29,342 --> 00:17:31,836
Unfortunately, we have
longevity on both sides.
484
00:17:31,837 --> 00:17:34,814
But what if, you guys? What if?
485
00:17:34,815 --> 00:17:36,577
You have to make another will.
486
00:17:36,578 --> 00:17:38,133
Without a will, there will be nothing
487
00:17:38,134 --> 00:17:39,489
but fighting and accusations,
488
00:17:39,490 --> 00:17:40,996
and eventually, the three of us
489
00:17:40,997 --> 00:17:42,168
will stop speaking to each other.
490
00:17:42,169 --> 00:17:44,651
And years will go by,
a-a-and our children
491
00:17:44,652 --> 00:17:45,691
won't even know their cousins.
492
00:17:45,692 --> 00:17:47,248
And we'll spend holidays apart.
493
00:17:47,249 --> 00:17:48,898
I'll be with my husband and children,
494
00:17:48,899 --> 00:17:51,530
and Axl will be across
town with his family,
495
00:17:51,531 --> 00:17:53,618
each wondering if the other
is having a merry Christmas,
496
00:17:53,619 --> 00:17:55,360
but each too proud to pick up the phone.
497
00:17:55,361 --> 00:17:57,348
And Brick, who refuses to choose sides,
498
00:17:57,349 --> 00:17:59,339
will be eating Christmas
dinner all by himself
499
00:17:59,340 --> 00:18:00,374
at a Perkins Restaurant,
500
00:18:00,375 --> 00:18:02,742
being served by a waitress
who feels sorry for him.
501
00:18:02,743 --> 00:18:04,454
You have to make a will,
502
00:18:04,455 --> 00:18:06,061
a specific, detailed,
who-gets-what,
503
00:18:06,062 --> 00:18:07,177
or it'll tear us apart.
504
00:18:07,178 --> 00:18:09,223
I've seen it before. Look
at Casey Kasem's family.
505
00:18:09,224 --> 00:18:12,031
Wait. Why am I the one
being pitied by a waitress?
506
00:18:12,032 --> 00:18:13,521
She's the one working on Christmas.
507
00:18:13,522 --> 00:18:16,439
My God, can we start this
not-talking thing now?
508
00:18:16,440 --> 00:18:17,947
You see how he treats us?
509
00:18:17,948 --> 00:18:20,043
Can you imagine if he gets to decide
510
00:18:20,044 --> 00:18:22,011
if I get aunt opal's purple cow creamer
511
00:18:22,012 --> 00:18:23,932
that you already promised me?
512
00:18:23,933 --> 00:18:25,520
Sue, that thing broke years ago.
513
00:18:25,521 --> 00:18:27,455
You say it broke, but did you see it break?
514
00:18:27,456 --> 00:18:30,316
Or is Axl looting from the estate already?
515
00:18:30,317 --> 00:18:33,118
Doesn't matter. What matters
is I found dad's wallet.
516
00:18:33,119 --> 00:18:35,067
Oh, no. I see what you're doing.
517
00:18:35,068 --> 00:18:36,883
You're trying to get on dad's good side
518
00:18:36,884 --> 00:18:38,297
so you'll get more of the inheritance.
519
00:18:38,298 --> 00:18:40,325
Well, maybe he'd be interested to know
520
00:18:40,326 --> 00:18:41,392
he didn't lose his wallet
521
00:18:41,393 --> 00:18:42,991
'cause you took it in the first place!
522
00:18:45,298 --> 00:18:46,224
Is that true?
523
00:18:46,225 --> 00:18:48,103
- No.
- Don't lie.
524
00:18:48,104 --> 00:18:49,429
Don't you dare lie right now!
525
00:18:49,430 --> 00:18:51,192
- It was Axl's idea!
- Ah!
526
00:18:51,193 --> 00:18:53,087
- He masterminded the whole thing!
- I have ideas, yes. Did I act on them? No!
527
00:18:53,088 --> 00:18:54,909
My brain does not think that way!
528
00:18:54,910 --> 00:18:56,657
- He's the one who did it!
- All right, you want a will?
529
00:18:56,658 --> 00:18:58,978
Fine. You got it. We'll make a will.
530
00:18:58,979 --> 00:19:05,617
"The last will and testament
of Michael and Frances Heck."
531
00:19:06,416 --> 00:19:08,655
So, what do you guys want?
532
00:19:10,734 --> 00:19:12,198
[Sighs]
533
00:19:18,678 --> 00:19:21,149
- I'm good.
- Nothing I want.
534
00:19:21,150 --> 00:19:23,281
I can't think of anything
off the top of my head.
535
00:19:24,078 --> 00:19:25,541
Well, I guess that's the good thing
536
00:19:25,542 --> 00:19:27,276
about not having anything anybody wants...
537
00:19:27,277 --> 00:19:28,550
there's no fighting...
538
00:19:29,280 --> 00:19:31,543
Not like that Casey Kasem's family.
539
00:19:31,544 --> 00:19:33,849
And would we like to be somewhere
540
00:19:33,850 --> 00:19:35,321
between Casey Kasem's family
541
00:19:35,322 --> 00:19:37,445
and people who do their
dishes in the shower?
542
00:19:37,446 --> 00:19:40,026
Sure. There's room for improvement.
543
00:19:40,027 --> 00:19:43,178
But maybe we are leaving
our kids something good...
544
00:19:43,179 --> 00:19:45,817
the ability to pull
together in tough times.
545
00:19:45,818 --> 00:19:49,130
And that's something you
can't put on a napkin.
546
00:19:52,932 --> 00:19:55,322
Okay, Heck, you're up!
547
00:19:55,323 --> 00:19:56,241
And remember...
548
00:19:56,242 --> 00:19:59,242
your routine had better
be mastered... mastered.
549
00:19:59,243 --> 00:20:00,377
And when I say "mastered,"
550
00:20:00,378 --> 00:20:03,660
I mean you better bring it... bring it.
551
00:20:03,661 --> 00:20:08,058
[Taylor swift's "Shake it Off" plays]
552
00:20:08,059 --> 00:20:09,651
[Hands and sticks clapping rhythmically]
553
00:20:09,652 --> 00:20:11,005
♪ I stay out too late ♪
554
00:20:12,286 --> 00:20:14,102
♪ Got nothing in my brain ♪
555
00:20:15,198 --> 00:20:18,309
♪ That's what people say, mm-mm ♪
556
00:20:18,310 --> 00:20:21,255
♪ That's what people say, mm-mm ♪
557
00:20:21,256 --> 00:20:23,272
♪ I go on too many dates ♪
558
00:20:23,273 --> 00:20:24,554
[Chuckles]
559
00:20:24,555 --> 00:20:26,293
♪ But I can't make 'em stay ♪
560
00:20:26,294 --> 00:20:29,381
♪ At least that's what people say ♪
561
00:20:29,382 --> 00:20:32,767
♪ I, I, I, I shake it
off, I shake it off ♪
562
00:20:32,768 --> 00:20:35,713
[Laughter]
563
00:20:36,623 --> 00:20:38,618
Heck, you blew my socks off.
564
00:20:38,619 --> 00:20:39,934
"B" plus!
565
00:20:39,935 --> 00:20:42,506
[Girls cheering]
566
00:20:44,982 --> 00:20:45,869
All right!
567
00:20:45,870 --> 00:20:49,596
Moving on to our next unit... gymnastics.
568
00:20:50,253 --> 00:20:52,210
[Breathing heavily]
569
00:20:52,211 --> 00:20:53,975
[Whimpering]
570
00:20:53,976 --> 00:20:55,597
[Groans]
571
00:20:56,346 --> 00:21:00,003
- Sync and Corrections by peterbrito -
- www.addic7ed.com -