1
00:00:03,318 --> 00:00:04,984
I don't know this number.
2
00:00:05,019 --> 00:00:06,819
Hello?
3
00:00:08,656 --> 00:00:10,523
It's Gabi, you don't have
to use the fake voice.
4
00:00:10,558 --> 00:00:12,492
I'm back from China and
I had an amazing time!
5
00:00:12,527 --> 00:00:14,427
Oh, my God, what is wrong with you?
6
00:00:14,462 --> 00:00:16,095
I haven't heard from you in three weeks!
7
00:00:16,130 --> 00:00:18,865
I'm sorry, but do you know how much
international cell phone plans cost?
8
00:00:18,900 --> 00:00:20,666
Thousands! You can't
even check your messages.
9
00:00:20,702 --> 00:00:22,602
Wait a second, you never
checked your messages?
10
00:00:22,637 --> 00:00:24,437
Uh, no. Why? Did you leave me one?
11
00:00:24,472 --> 00:00:28,174
No. Uh, but if someone did,
when would you be hearing them?
12
00:00:28,209 --> 00:00:30,826
Uh, when I get my luggage.
13
00:00:30,879 --> 00:00:32,345
Come pick me up. I gotta go.
14
00:00:32,347 --> 00:00:34,647
This guy said I could borrow his phone
if I carried his bag through customs,
15
00:00:34,682 --> 00:00:36,682
and I just read a sign that
said I should not do that.
16
00:00:40,688 --> 00:00:44,056
Uh, don't know this number.
17
00:00:44,092 --> 00:00:45,992
Hello?
18
00:00:46,027 --> 00:00:47,627
Josh, it-it's Sofia.
19
00:00:47,662 --> 00:00:49,645
Gabi's back from China. She
just called me from the airport,
20
00:00:49,681 --> 00:00:51,430
and she never got your message.
21
00:00:51,466 --> 00:00:52,565
W-what?
22
00:00:52,600 --> 00:00:53,833
Her phone was off the whole time.
23
00:00:53,868 --> 00:00:56,202
Look, she didn't reject you,
she just never got your message.
24
00:00:56,237 --> 00:00:58,070
Oh my God, then she never has to hear it!
25
00:00:58,106 --> 00:01:00,006
Why would you not want her to hear it?
26
00:01:00,041 --> 00:01:02,608
Because I'm a human being
who can experience shame?
27
00:01:03,859 --> 00:01:05,986
Look, I've been racking my brain
trying to figure out a way to make
28
00:01:06,012 --> 00:01:08,147
this less awkward When I see
her, and now I don't have to.
29
00:01:08,182 --> 00:01:11,083
Yes, you do! She has a
right to hear that message!
30
00:01:11,119 --> 00:01:13,853
That long, awkward message.
31
00:01:14,412 --> 00:01:18,291
N-no. She's moved on, I've
moved on, everything's changed.
32
00:01:18,332 --> 00:01:20,742
What do you mean "everything's changed"?
33
00:01:23,064 --> 00:01:25,002
Happy two-week anniversary.
34
00:01:25,800 --> 00:01:27,099
Who's that?
35
00:01:27,135 --> 00:01:28,801
Who is that?
36
00:01:29,821 --> 00:01:31,779
I'll meet you at the airport in 15 minutes.
37
00:01:33,207 --> 00:01:34,560
I'll meet you at the airport in 16 minutes.
38
00:01:36,807 --> 00:01:37,633
Woo!
39
00:01:39,368 --> 00:01:43,868
Sync & corrections by PetaG
- www.addic7ed.com -
40
00:01:58,066 --> 00:01:59,932
Josh, you have to tell her how you feel.
41
00:01:59,968 --> 00:02:00,967
No, I don't.
42
00:02:00,969 --> 00:02:03,019
That was so three weeks ago.
43
00:02:03,054 --> 00:02:06,188
But she's going to hear the message
when she turns on her phone anyway.
44
00:02:06,561 --> 00:02:07,923
Not if I get her a new phone.
45
00:02:07,925 --> 00:02:08,892
How's that gonna happen?
46
00:02:08,893 --> 00:02:10,642
Because in every airport, there's a...
47
00:02:10,643 --> 00:02:12,349
Boom! I love America.
48
00:02:13,815 --> 00:02:15,197
- Sofia!
- Aah!
49
00:02:15,233 --> 00:02:18,417
- Welcome home! It's so good to see you!
- You too!
50
00:02:18,419 --> 00:02:20,970
Though I will miss being the
only blonde in a 10-mile radius.
51
00:02:21,005 --> 00:02:25,925
- So, what's going on? What did I miss?
- Nothing! Nothing, everybody shut up.
52
00:02:25,977 --> 00:02:28,978
Josh, hi! What are you doing here?
53
00:02:29,013 --> 00:02:30,813
What are any of us doing here?
54
00:02:30,848 --> 00:02:32,848
Really, that's the question
that haunts me every day.
55
00:02:32,900 --> 00:02:36,102
So, how was it? Best time of your
life? Killer, awesome, amazing?
56
00:02:36,154 --> 00:02:37,987
Yes, it was absolutely perfect.
57
00:02:38,015 --> 00:02:39,876
Heh. Hear that, Sofia?
58
00:02:40,195 --> 00:02:41,273
Yes, I do.
59
00:02:41,275 --> 00:02:44,076
Perfect because you like Cooper, or China?
60
00:02:44,112 --> 00:02:45,337
Uh, both.
61
00:02:45,338 --> 00:02:47,347
No, pick one. You have to pick one.
62
00:02:48,249 --> 00:02:51,061
Uh, okay. Ah, ah, Cooper then.
63
00:02:51,073 --> 00:02:53,836
I mean, he's amazing.
He's sexy, he's confident,
64
00:02:53,871 --> 00:02:55,344
and he knows everything about China.
65
00:02:55,345 --> 00:02:58,174
Chinese people were asking him
where to find the best Chinese food.
66
00:02:58,601 --> 00:03:00,601
What she's saying is
she's happy with Cooper.
67
00:03:01,477 --> 00:03:04,457
So, there's nothing left
to say except, shwah!
68
00:03:04,877 --> 00:03:05,965
A new phone?
69
00:03:05,967 --> 00:03:07,614
Why-why'd you do that?
I have mine right here.
70
00:03:07,615 --> 00:03:09,758
We don't have to turn that on. No.
71
00:03:09,802 --> 00:03:10,770
Why not?
72
00:03:10,805 --> 00:03:11,854
While you were gone,
73
00:03:11,889 --> 00:03:13,139
there was a phone virus
that swept the country.
74
00:03:13,191 --> 00:03:15,891
People everywhere were talking
face-to-face. It was horrible.
75
00:03:18,279 --> 00:03:19,779
But, hey, no worries.
76
00:03:19,814 --> 00:03:21,864
I'll just transfer the stuff from
your old phone to your new phone.
77
00:03:21,899 --> 00:03:23,149
You can grab it tomorrow
when you come to work,
78
00:03:23,151 --> 00:03:24,564
and then you can meet Jilly.
79
00:03:24,595 --> 00:03:27,720
Aww, Jilly! Did you get a kitty?
80
00:03:28,756 --> 00:03:30,656
No. I got a girlfriend.
81
00:03:30,692 --> 00:03:33,559
Oh, wow. That was fast.
82
00:03:33,594 --> 00:03:36,212
No, me and Jilly met a while
ago at this tech conference,
83
00:03:36,264 --> 00:03:38,330
which makes her sound kind of nerdy,
but she's not, she's just super smart,
84
00:03:38,366 --> 00:03:40,768
and like, really hot. Did I
mention she's a beauty queen?
85
00:03:40,769 --> 00:03:43,213
Anyway, she found out
me and Caroline broke up,
86
00:03:43,214 --> 00:03:45,871
and she sent me this Facebook
message, and the rest is history.
87
00:03:45,890 --> 00:03:49,675
Wow! Well, would you look
at that, we are all so happy!
88
00:03:49,677 --> 00:03:53,045
I know, right? Like, you have
Cooper, I have Jilly, Sofia has...
89
00:03:53,081 --> 00:03:54,095
A new phone.
90
00:03:56,851 --> 00:03:58,684
As long as you keep it on silent.
91
00:04:06,244 --> 00:04:09,095
Oh, so that's how he gets
his hair to stand on end.
92
00:04:10,264 --> 00:04:12,681
I figured he just looked at
himself in the mirror naked.
93
00:04:14,050 --> 00:04:16,584
By the way, Yolanda, I've
been meaning to thank you.
94
00:04:16,651 --> 00:04:17,583
For what?
95
00:04:17,657 --> 00:04:18,718
Not wearing a skirt.
96
00:04:21,109 --> 00:04:23,075
All right, done.
97
00:04:23,111 --> 00:04:25,878
I just transferred everything from
Gabi's old phone onto my laptop,
98
00:04:25,913 --> 00:04:27,113
then loaded it onto her new phone.
99
00:04:27,148 --> 00:04:29,825
Except that awkward message,
which now no one will hear.
100
00:04:32,787 --> 00:04:35,720
After I called off my wedding,
you're the one I wanted to see, Gabi.
101
00:04:35,721 --> 00:04:40,146
I even drove to your house climbed up your
fire escape roses to Pretty Woman you.
102
00:04:43,366 --> 00:04:44,468
Now, no one will hear it.
103
00:04:47,535 --> 00:04:50,536
Ooh, here comes that fine window washer.
104
00:04:50,571 --> 00:04:53,973
Mmm-mm, he can squeegee me any day.
105
00:04:54,008 --> 00:04:56,108
Hey.
106
00:04:56,144 --> 00:04:57,777
Please, like you have a chance.
107
00:04:57,812 --> 00:05:00,164
Half the women in the building
want to get "squeegeed" by him.
108
00:05:00,750 --> 00:05:01,716
Get out.
109
00:05:03,751 --> 00:05:05,334
Hi!
110
00:05:05,386 --> 00:05:08,087
You are hot.
111
00:05:24,267 --> 00:05:27,807
Hey guys! Back from
China, never looked finah.
112
00:05:27,842 --> 00:05:31,911
Seems like you've been gone forever, baby!
113
00:05:31,946 --> 00:05:34,140
Really? It already seems
like you've been back forever.
114
00:05:36,617 --> 00:05:37,835
So, how was your trip?
115
00:05:37,836 --> 00:05:41,120
Oh, China was amazing! Everywhere we
went, they treated us like royalty.
116
00:05:41,155 --> 00:05:42,938
Of course, they all thought
I was Carrie Underwood.
117
00:05:43,885 --> 00:05:44,907
Here you go.
118
00:05:44,959 --> 00:05:46,091
I transferred all your info.
119
00:05:46,143 --> 00:05:48,894
And all the messages you need
to hear are in this phone.
120
00:05:48,930 --> 00:05:50,896
Oh, great. Okay, thanks, Josh.
121
00:05:50,932 --> 00:05:52,665
Is this a welcome back breakfast?
122
00:05:52,700 --> 00:05:55,625
Kinda. This magnificent
feast is courtesy of Jilly.
123
00:05:55,925 --> 00:05:57,319
Oh, the new girlfriend.
124
00:05:57,355 --> 00:05:58,370
The one and only.
125
00:05:58,406 --> 00:06:00,873
You must be Gabi. Aren't
you cute as a button!
126
00:06:00,901 --> 00:06:03,433
Oh. Hi, it's really nice to meet you.
127
00:06:03,441 --> 00:06:04,422
Yeah, I borrowed one of your aprons,
128
00:06:04,423 --> 00:06:05,691
- I hope you don't mind.
- Oh, of course not.
129
00:06:05,692 --> 00:06:07,141
Good. Now, come sit your sweet buns down
130
00:06:07,142 --> 00:06:08,938
and have some of my sweet
buns while they're still warm.
131
00:06:08,944 --> 00:06:09,682
Okay.
132
00:06:09,925 --> 00:06:11,792
I always thought I hated
all girls who cooked.
133
00:06:11,793 --> 00:06:13,326
Turns out, just you.
134
00:06:17,048 --> 00:06:18,114
These are really good.
135
00:06:18,149 --> 00:06:19,949
You know, whenever I make
waffles, I usually make...
136
00:06:19,985 --> 00:06:20,950
Fried chicken?
137
00:06:20,986 --> 00:06:23,920
Ooh, good thing I've been going to the gym.
138
00:06:25,119 --> 00:06:28,274
Wow, um... seems like everybody
really loves your cooking.
139
00:06:28,326 --> 00:06:30,209
Among other things, huh? Huh?
140
00:06:31,145 --> 00:06:32,638
Okay. Well, um...
141
00:06:32,639 --> 00:06:34,432
Thanks for keeping
everybody well-fed, Jilly,
142
00:06:34,433 --> 00:06:36,584
but I think I'll just take it from here.
143
00:06:38,837 --> 00:06:40,246
All right, we're confirmed.
144
00:06:40,247 --> 00:06:43,239
That development team from Austin is
coming here for dinner tomorrow night.
145
00:06:43,274 --> 00:06:44,666
Excellent! Any thoughts on the menu?
146
00:06:44,667 --> 00:06:46,655
How about chicken pot pie?
147
00:06:48,307 --> 00:06:51,264
Sorry. I just got so used to cooking
for Josh, I thought he was talking to me.
148
00:06:51,778 --> 00:06:54,205
No, he was talking to me,
'cause, you know, I'm the chef.
149
00:06:54,753 --> 00:06:57,720
Of course you are, but I don't see
why Jilly can't make the dinner.
150
00:06:57,756 --> 00:06:59,706
Because it's my job to cook the dinner?
151
00:06:59,758 --> 00:07:01,374
But, you've been gone for three weeks.
152
00:07:01,959 --> 00:07:03,159
Well, what does that mean?
153
00:07:03,194 --> 00:07:05,028
You know, things changed a little bit.
154
00:07:05,057 --> 00:07:07,902
Since you went on vacation with your
boyfriend to China for three weeks.
155
00:07:09,428 --> 00:07:10,600
But, you said I could go.
156
00:07:10,601 --> 00:07:12,141
I said you could go because you asked me.
157
00:07:12,347 --> 00:07:13,636
Okay, but now I'm back.
158
00:07:13,688 --> 00:07:15,438
And now I have a girlfriend,
and she likes to cook.
159
00:07:15,473 --> 00:07:16,672
So, if she wants to
make the dinner, she can.
160
00:07:16,708 --> 00:07:18,307
Aww, thanks, baby.
161
00:07:20,245 --> 00:07:21,277
Fun.
162
00:07:21,312 --> 00:07:24,097
Why can't you date
somebody who can do my job?
163
00:07:31,741 --> 00:07:33,607
You are never gonna believe
what Josh just told me.
164
00:07:33,643 --> 00:07:35,726
Oh, thank God, finally!
165
00:07:36,507 --> 00:07:37,445
You know?
166
00:07:38,332 --> 00:07:42,016
I know that it's something
big, and that I don't know it.
167
00:07:42,051 --> 00:07:44,165
So, tell me.
168
00:07:44,492 --> 00:07:47,323
Josh is having a business dinner tomorrow
night, and Jilly wants to cook it,
169
00:07:47,324 --> 00:07:48,522
and he's letting her.
170
00:07:48,558 --> 00:07:50,839
That's what this is about? Jilly?
171
00:07:50,876 --> 00:07:53,227
Yeah, can't you see? She's
moving in on my territory!
172
00:07:53,262 --> 00:07:55,276
With her sweet buns and
that adorable accent,
173
00:07:55,277 --> 00:07:57,264
Argh, I hate her!
174
00:07:57,783 --> 00:08:00,668
Your territory? I thought
you were over Josh?
175
00:08:00,703 --> 00:08:02,246
You picked Cooper.
You're happy with Cooper.
176
00:08:02,247 --> 00:08:05,010
Yes, I am happy with Cooper
and I'm glad I picked Cooper,
177
00:08:05,011 --> 00:08:06,807
I'm just not glad that Josh picked Jilly.
178
00:08:06,843 --> 00:08:08,676
I mean, she's trying to take over my job!
179
00:08:08,678 --> 00:08:12,179
Oh, my God. Well, I want
to hear all about it.
180
00:08:13,328 --> 00:08:16,851
But first, can you take your shoes
off and put them on the new shoe rack?
181
00:08:17,336 --> 00:08:19,428
I started it while you
were gone, so... just...
182
00:08:19,429 --> 00:08:21,822
Oh God, has everything
changed since I left?
183
00:08:21,858 --> 00:08:23,757
Okay, seriously, Gabi. Shoes.
184
00:08:24,491 --> 00:08:28,395
I mean, I'm gone three weeks, and Josh
has a girlfriend, and you have a shoe rack.
185
00:08:29,317 --> 00:08:31,315
Okay, it is just one dinner.
186
00:08:31,367 --> 00:08:33,150
No. No, no, no.
187
00:08:33,202 --> 00:08:35,135
First it's one dinner, then it's two,
188
00:08:35,171 --> 00:08:37,557
then it's bye-bye Gabi, and she's
cooking for him all the time!
189
00:08:37,558 --> 00:08:39,102
This is a gateway dinner!
190
00:08:40,943 --> 00:08:44,278
Well, you are cracked out on
jet lag, and you need some sleep.
191
00:08:44,313 --> 00:08:45,744
No. No, you know what I need?
192
00:08:45,745 --> 00:08:48,470
I need to roll Jilly up in a
carpet and toss her off a bridge!
193
00:08:49,745 --> 00:08:52,119
Yes, now I hear it. Yeah, okay.
194
00:08:52,154 --> 00:08:53,746
I am cracked out on jet lag.
195
00:08:53,747 --> 00:08:55,815
I'm gonna call Cooper,
and take a little nappy.
196
00:08:58,971 --> 00:09:01,146
Hey, Gabi, could you, um... Take your...
197
00:09:03,599 --> 00:09:05,232
Thank you.
198
00:09:16,012 --> 00:09:17,412
Are you okay, sugar?
199
00:09:17,881 --> 00:09:19,446
I'm sorry.
200
00:09:19,482 --> 00:09:21,181
Just having a hard time sleeping.
201
00:09:21,623 --> 00:09:23,890
I know what's going on.
Though, I'm afraid to
202
00:09:23,891 --> 00:09:26,921
say it because I don't want you
to think I'm insecure. But...
203
00:09:27,890 --> 00:09:29,857
I'm insecure.
204
00:09:30,599 --> 00:09:31,792
You?
205
00:09:31,827 --> 00:09:33,494
What are you insecure about?
206
00:09:33,529 --> 00:09:35,655
The truth is, it's only been three weeks,
207
00:09:35,656 --> 00:09:39,099
and I just feel like you
might still be hung up on her.
208
00:09:40,543 --> 00:09:42,427
Trust me. I'm over her.
209
00:09:43,121 --> 00:09:45,039
She's moved on, I've moved on.
210
00:09:46,776 --> 00:09:48,609
It's okay to say her name.
211
00:09:48,611 --> 00:09:51,485
Your ex-fiancée Caroline.
212
00:09:53,780 --> 00:09:54,962
Caroline?
213
00:09:55,284 --> 00:09:57,901
Yes. Caroline.
214
00:09:57,937 --> 00:10:00,854
That's who I'm over. Very over.
215
00:10:00,890 --> 00:10:03,358
From now on, it's just the two of us.
216
00:10:07,113 --> 00:10:09,244
And whoever's trying
to break in downstairs.
217
00:10:28,691 --> 00:10:29,853
- Oh!
- Ah!
218
00:10:31,921 --> 00:10:35,381
Gabi, what are you doing
here? It's 3:00 in the morning.
219
00:10:35,382 --> 00:10:36,439
Not in China.
220
00:10:37,493 --> 00:10:38,592
And, you know what they say,
221
00:10:38,628 --> 00:10:41,261
the early bird gets to cook the bird.
222
00:10:41,669 --> 00:10:42,801
Right?
223
00:10:42,802 --> 00:10:44,168
No one says that.
224
00:10:45,101 --> 00:10:46,700
We've discussed this.
225
00:10:46,736 --> 00:10:48,769
My girlfriend is cooking the dinner.
226
00:10:49,135 --> 00:10:50,835
Your "girlfriend."
227
00:10:51,492 --> 00:10:54,139
Why did you put my girlfriend in quotes?
Why did you put my girlfriend in quotes?
228
00:10:55,331 --> 00:10:57,825
I don't know, Josh, maybe because
three weeks ago you were engaged,
229
00:10:57,826 --> 00:10:58,992
and now you have a...
230
00:11:00,933 --> 00:11:03,717
First of all, this is none of
your business, you are my chef.
231
00:11:03,718 --> 00:11:05,968
If I am your chef, then I
should be making the dinner.
232
00:11:05,969 --> 00:11:07,205
Kind of looks like you
are making the dinner.
233
00:11:07,206 --> 00:11:08,662
I am? Oh, thank you!
234
00:11:09,558 --> 00:11:10,557
She is?
235
00:11:10,666 --> 00:11:11,781
No, she's not.
236
00:11:11,782 --> 00:11:13,260
She's going home.
237
00:11:13,295 --> 00:11:14,361
We're going to bed.
238
00:11:15,146 --> 00:11:17,965
Sweetie, just give me one
second. I'll be up in a jiff.
239
00:11:20,169 --> 00:11:22,803
Hon, I'm sorry that I worried you so much
240
00:11:22,838 --> 00:11:24,505
you felt like you had to come over here.
241
00:11:24,540 --> 00:11:26,753
But, here's the thing. Josh
and I are in a new relationship,
242
00:11:26,754 --> 00:11:28,978
and I think he may be a
little hung up on his ex still,
243
00:11:28,979 --> 00:11:31,803
so I'm using every biscuit
in my basket to win him over.
244
00:11:31,804 --> 00:11:33,415
You understand, right?
245
00:11:33,416 --> 00:11:35,115
I-I do, yeah, I totally do.
246
00:11:35,151 --> 00:11:37,851
I need this job.
247
00:11:37,887 --> 00:11:40,521
Well, appears we have a situation.
248
00:11:40,556 --> 00:11:42,322
Appears we do.
249
00:11:43,492 --> 00:11:45,192
How do you suggest we remedy that?
250
00:11:45,227 --> 00:11:50,238
Well, ah, how about we both cook the dinner
and we see which one Josh likes the best.
251
00:11:50,239 --> 00:11:52,166
Um, if you're asking for
a cook-off, you got one.
252
00:11:52,591 --> 00:11:56,937
Okay, well, if I win, then I cook the
dinner, and you stay out of my kitchen.
253
00:11:56,972 --> 00:12:00,674
And if I win, I cook the dinner, and
any other dinner I want to from now on.
254
00:12:00,710 --> 00:12:02,169
In Josh's kitchen.
255
00:12:02,170 --> 00:12:03,544
- Game on!
- So on!
256
00:12:04,175 --> 00:12:05,500
Let's wait till the sun comes up.
257
00:12:05,862 --> 00:12:07,133
- Good idea.
- Okay.
258
00:12:11,787 --> 00:12:13,721
Ooh, something smells good in here.
259
00:12:13,756 --> 00:12:14,822
Thank you.
260
00:12:14,857 --> 00:12:16,557
She was talking to me!
261
00:12:17,693 --> 00:12:19,042
Crazy white girls.
262
00:12:20,463 --> 00:12:22,062
Look at you.
263
00:12:22,098 --> 00:12:24,098
I don't know who's working
harder, you or those Spanx.
264
00:12:26,035 --> 00:12:27,768
The Spanx.
265
00:12:27,803 --> 00:12:30,938
I am one popcorn shrimp away from
blowing a button and killing the man.
266
00:12:32,591 --> 00:12:36,343
I still don't know how you got a date
with the world's sexiest window washer.
267
00:12:36,378 --> 00:12:38,278
We have a connection.
268
00:12:38,314 --> 00:12:40,414
We were able to communicate
with just our hands.
269
00:12:40,449 --> 00:12:43,117
Tss. Boom.
270
00:12:46,184 --> 00:12:48,327
Hey.
271
00:12:58,167 --> 00:13:00,834
But, let's talk with our voices now.
272
00:13:00,870 --> 00:13:03,570
We can talk with our hands later.
273
00:13:04,287 --> 00:13:06,278
You know I'm deaf, right?
274
00:13:13,048 --> 00:13:14,214
No.
275
00:13:14,250 --> 00:13:15,783
No, I did not.
276
00:13:17,670 --> 00:13:18,882
Hold on.
277
00:13:21,624 --> 00:13:23,257
He's deaf. What do I do?
278
00:13:23,292 --> 00:13:25,292
Go out with him. He's hot.
279
00:13:25,327 --> 00:13:27,394
But, I've never been out
with a deaf guy before.
280
00:13:27,429 --> 00:13:29,963
So? You've never been
out with a hot guy before.
281
00:13:32,503 --> 00:13:33,967
How are we supposed to communicate?
282
00:13:34,003 --> 00:13:36,570
Why are we whispering? He can't hear us.
283
00:13:37,142 --> 00:13:39,776
I can read lips, mamacita.
284
00:13:42,461 --> 00:13:45,362
Well, look at that, you finally
have a date who can read.
285
00:13:51,720 --> 00:13:53,821
Here's the research on the
guys coming to dinner tonight.
286
00:13:53,856 --> 00:13:56,390
Only one of them is cute.
287
00:13:56,425 --> 00:13:59,326
Did you figure out a way to make sure
I pick Jilly's pie over Gabi's pie?
288
00:13:59,361 --> 00:14:02,196
Can we please stop
talking about their pies?
289
00:14:02,231 --> 00:14:03,897
It's making me dry heave.
290
00:14:03,933 --> 00:14:05,732
I'm serious.
291
00:14:05,768 --> 00:14:07,201
I need to pick Jilly's.
292
00:14:07,236 --> 00:14:11,388
It's easy. Jilly's using the aubergine
ramekin, Gabi's using the chartreuse.
293
00:14:13,106 --> 00:14:14,431
Can you say that again in hetero?
294
00:14:15,485 --> 00:14:17,978
Jilly's purple, Gabi's green.
295
00:14:19,114 --> 00:14:21,285
And a ramekin's a small dish you bake in.
296
00:14:21,286 --> 00:14:22,783
Gotcha.
297
00:14:22,835 --> 00:14:24,718
Why does it matter who wins?
298
00:14:24,753 --> 00:14:26,653
Because Jilly's starting to feel insecure.
299
00:14:26,654 --> 00:14:28,203
She's worried that I'm not over Gabi.
300
00:14:28,490 --> 00:14:30,802
Caroline. She's worried
I'm not over Caroline.
301
00:14:31,234 --> 00:14:33,555
So, I have to pick Jilly's pie
to prove that I'm into Gabi.
302
00:14:33,556 --> 00:14:35,262
Jilly! I'm into Jilly! Jilly, Jilly!
303
00:14:37,066 --> 00:14:38,098
Who's green again?
304
00:14:40,769 --> 00:14:42,569
Okay, first we have to blindfold you.
305
00:14:42,605 --> 00:14:44,605
No, no. Why do I have to be blindfolded?
306
00:14:44,640 --> 00:14:46,302
Mmm, didn't seem to bother you last night.
307
00:14:46,303 --> 00:14:48,219
This is so not that.
308
00:14:48,456 --> 00:14:50,255
Okay, here we go.
309
00:14:55,017 --> 00:14:57,084
Mmm!
310
00:14:57,119 --> 00:14:58,619
So good.
311
00:14:59,788 --> 00:15:01,455
Mmm.
312
00:15:01,490 --> 00:15:02,755
And, number two.
313
00:15:06,671 --> 00:15:07,508
Uh...
314
00:15:08,264 --> 00:15:10,998
Mmm!
315
00:15:11,033 --> 00:15:12,816
Also delicious.
316
00:15:12,868 --> 00:15:14,735
So, which do you choose?
317
00:15:14,770 --> 00:15:16,982
Wow, wow, wow, wow, wow.
Which one do I choose?
318
00:15:16,983 --> 00:15:18,405
Just pick one!
319
00:15:19,725 --> 00:15:21,375
Fine.
320
00:15:21,410 --> 00:15:24,411
I... pick...
321
00:15:24,439 --> 00:15:25,603
the first one.
322
00:15:25,679 --> 00:15:26,830
- Aah! That's mine.
- What?
323
00:15:26,882 --> 00:15:28,782
I won! I beat a professional chef.
324
00:15:28,817 --> 00:15:30,067
You picked mine, sweetie!
325
00:15:30,119 --> 00:15:31,919
- Thank God.
- Um...
326
00:15:31,954 --> 00:15:33,754
Well, congrats. You won fair and square.
327
00:15:33,756 --> 00:15:36,423
Chin up, Gabi. There's no
shame in being runner-up.
328
00:15:36,458 --> 00:15:37,391
Or so I've been told.
329
00:15:39,328 --> 00:15:40,327
Gabi, wait.
330
00:15:41,563 --> 00:15:43,063
Here.
331
00:15:43,098 --> 00:15:46,116
Take one of my pies. It looks like you
could use a little bit of comfort food.
332
00:15:47,354 --> 00:15:49,679
Thanks. (laughs)
333
00:15:55,840 --> 00:15:58,807
You're back early. It didn't work out?
334
00:15:58,809 --> 00:16:00,826
No, it did not.
335
00:16:00,827 --> 00:16:03,294
Well, maybe next time you
should date a blind guy.
336
00:16:05,810 --> 00:16:07,215
What happened?
337
00:16:10,335 --> 00:16:13,208
When the check came, he wanted to go Dutch.
338
00:16:13,496 --> 00:16:16,363
I can't blame him. I've
seen how much you can eat.
339
00:16:21,397 --> 00:16:24,999
And then, he paid for his
half with a two-for-one coupon.
340
00:16:25,235 --> 00:16:30,305
Ugh. You gotta dump his
cheap, but well-sculpted ass.
341
00:16:31,075 --> 00:16:33,809
I can't. He'll think I'm
prejudiced against the deaf.
342
00:16:33,811 --> 00:16:36,201
But, I'm just prejudiced against the cheap.
343
00:16:37,262 --> 00:16:39,982
Yeah. If a man wants your milk,
344
00:16:39,983 --> 00:16:43,165
he's gotta buy the whole cow.
345
00:16:53,968 --> 00:16:57,573
Except for "no dairy" Gary,
I'd say dinner was a hit.
346
00:16:57,735 --> 00:16:59,484
I'd say you were a hit.
347
00:17:00,772 --> 00:17:02,320
I like the music you picked.
348
00:17:02,373 --> 00:17:04,176
Really? Let's turn it up.
349
00:17:11,014 --> 00:17:12,781
May I have this dance, m'lady?
350
00:17:14,852 --> 00:17:16,485
Ooh.
351
00:17:18,430 --> 00:17:20,555
Aww, handsome, and he can dance.
352
00:17:20,591 --> 00:17:22,224
Mmm, wait till Thriller comes on.
353
00:17:22,259 --> 00:17:23,325
Ooh!
354
00:17:23,360 --> 00:17:25,260
Hey, Gabi I'm calling you from...
355
00:17:25,295 --> 00:17:26,962
- No, no, no, no!
- the airport, actually.
356
00:17:26,997 --> 00:17:28,428
Last night, after I called off my wedding,
357
00:17:28,429 --> 00:17:29,924
Wrong song. You're the
one I wanted to see.
358
00:17:29,925 --> 00:17:32,682
This is... I even drove to your
house and climbed up your fire escape
359
00:17:32,683 --> 00:17:33,749
with roses to...
360
00:17:41,064 --> 00:17:42,377
So, where were we?
361
00:17:43,678 --> 00:17:45,313
- Oh, my God!
- No, I can explain!
362
00:17:45,349 --> 00:17:47,883
It's not Caroline you're
still hung up on, it's Gabi.
363
00:17:47,918 --> 00:17:50,802
No! No, no, no, no. Okay, no, no, no.
364
00:17:50,838 --> 00:17:52,383
You don't understand.
365
00:17:52,384 --> 00:17:53,746
The reason why that's on my laptop,
366
00:17:53,747 --> 00:17:55,530
is because I took it off her phone.
367
00:17:55,592 --> 00:17:57,842
See, I didn't want her to listen
to it because I'm so happy with you.
368
00:17:57,843 --> 00:17:59,292
So, you don't have feelings for Gabi?
369
00:18:02,090 --> 00:18:03,756
That's what I thought.
370
00:18:03,967 --> 00:18:06,454
Josh, you are adorable and a good man,
371
00:18:06,455 --> 00:18:08,221
but I am never runner-up.
372
00:18:08,539 --> 00:18:09,738
Don't go.
373
00:18:09,773 --> 00:18:11,373
I'll be fine.
374
00:18:11,408 --> 00:18:12,691
Goodbye, Josh.
375
00:18:13,744 --> 00:18:16,378
Goodbye, Gabi. Jilly!
376
00:18:24,221 --> 00:18:26,021
I could be a valet parker.
377
00:18:26,056 --> 00:18:28,573
Really? Can you drive a stick?
378
00:18:28,625 --> 00:18:29,558
No.
379
00:18:29,593 --> 00:18:31,460
Can you parallel park?
380
00:18:31,495 --> 00:18:32,069
No.
381
00:18:32,070 --> 00:18:33,562
Then, can you be a valet parker?
382
00:18:33,614 --> 00:18:35,397
No.
383
00:18:36,166 --> 00:18:38,997
God, what happened?
Everything was so perfect.
384
00:18:38,998 --> 00:18:41,698
I had an amazing time in China,
I had a great time with Cooper,
385
00:18:41,699 --> 00:18:42,831
I had a job.
386
00:18:42,869 --> 00:18:45,631
Hey, Gabi, it's Josh,
I need to talk to you.
387
00:18:53,750 --> 00:18:55,717
Go ahead. Get it over with quick.
388
00:18:55,719 --> 00:18:56,768
I'm fired, right?
389
00:18:56,820 --> 00:18:58,487
You're not fired.
390
00:18:58,522 --> 00:19:00,522
How could you not fire me? I would fire me!
391
00:19:00,541 --> 00:19:03,191
I can't even cook a pot
pie better than a civilian.
392
00:19:03,227 --> 00:19:05,126
Gabi, stop.
393
00:19:05,162 --> 00:19:08,163
- I picked hers on purpose.
- Nice try. It was a blind taste test.
394
00:19:08,165 --> 00:19:09,147
And I knew which one was yours.
395
00:19:09,183 --> 00:19:10,966
- How?
- Bacon in the crust.
396
00:19:11,871 --> 00:19:13,621
Signature Gabi move.
397
00:19:13,887 --> 00:19:17,022
Also, no onions, 'cause I hate them.
398
00:19:17,057 --> 00:19:18,940
Extra peas, 'cause I love them.
399
00:19:18,976 --> 00:19:20,626
You did know.
400
00:19:20,736 --> 00:19:22,769
Well, then why did you pick hers?
401
00:19:22,796 --> 00:19:23,995
Oh...
402
00:19:24,147 --> 00:19:25,864
For the sex reasons.
403
00:19:27,644 --> 00:19:30,992
I just really wanted things
to work out with Jilly.
404
00:19:31,154 --> 00:19:32,871
What do you mean "wanted"? What happened?
405
00:19:32,906 --> 00:19:34,122
We broke up.
406
00:19:34,157 --> 00:19:35,707
What! Why?
407
00:19:36,731 --> 00:19:38,772
She didn't like my music.
408
00:19:39,911 --> 00:19:45,615
And I also think that maybe it was a little
too soon for me to have a "girlfriend."
409
00:19:45,616 --> 00:19:47,065
Aww, Josh.
410
00:19:47,066 --> 00:19:50,450
Someday, you're gonna find a girlfriend
you don't have to put quotes around.
411
00:19:50,451 --> 00:19:52,401
I mean, somebody who's incredible for you,
412
00:19:52,402 --> 00:19:55,270
who totally gets you, and
who, hopefully, can't cook.
413
00:19:56,870 --> 00:19:58,653
- You think so?
- Yeah.
414
00:19:58,654 --> 00:20:00,487
You're gonna find somebody
who's perfect for you.
415
00:20:01,372 --> 00:20:02,404
Just like me and Cooper.
416
00:20:03,585 --> 00:20:04,584
Just like you and Cooper.
417
00:20:04,905 --> 00:20:05,854
Yeah.
418
00:20:08,735 --> 00:20:11,686
Hey, do you want to see pictures
of my trip to China with Cooper?
419
00:20:11,778 --> 00:20:13,061
Not even a little.
420
00:20:18,791 --> 00:20:21,184
Okay, I just finished my break up text.
421
00:20:21,235 --> 00:20:22,752
How does this sound?
422
00:20:22,980 --> 00:20:25,592
"George, it was really nice to meet you.
423
00:20:25,761 --> 00:20:28,678
"But, I have to be honest,
I have three months to live.
424
00:20:30,180 --> 00:20:33,047
"And it would be cruel to give you so much
425
00:20:33,048 --> 00:20:35,015
"only to take it away."
426
00:20:36,524 --> 00:20:38,524
It's good. Really, really good.
427
00:20:39,858 --> 00:20:41,608
So, you don't think he'll be too crushed?
428
00:20:42,694 --> 00:20:45,412
Uh, no. I think he'll be okay.
429
00:20:45,457 --> 00:20:47,465
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