1
00:00:01,220 --> 00:00:02,588
I had to go to therapy
2
00:00:02,622 --> 00:00:04,642
in all five detox centers
I've been to.
3
00:00:05,023 --> 00:00:06,157
Was it beneficial?
4
00:00:06,192 --> 00:00:08,124
You just heard
me say five, right?
5
00:00:08,159 --> 00:00:10,160
See, this is what I'm saying,
guys; it's not gonna work.
6
00:00:10,195 --> 00:00:12,296
Hey, Dad, Dad, we are doing
this whether you like it or not.
7
00:00:12,330 --> 00:00:13,997
- Yeah, what harm could it do?
- What harm could it do?
8
00:00:14,031 --> 00:00:15,432
Did you see
the Metallica documentary
9
00:00:15,466 --> 00:00:16,667
where they had
that life enhancement coach,
10
00:00:16,701 --> 00:00:18,402
and it almost destroyed
the band?
11
00:00:18,436 --> 00:00:19,769
Yeah, but it didn't.
It actually saved them.
12
00:00:19,804 --> 00:00:21,104
And our guy,
he's not a coach.
13
00:00:21,138 --> 00:00:22,506
Hey, he fixed Daltrey,
14
00:00:22,540 --> 00:00:24,474
Townshend,
Kings of Leon, saved Aerosmith.
15
00:00:24,509 --> 00:00:25,842
Yeah, he should have
saved us all from Aerosmith.
16
00:00:25,876 --> 00:00:27,643
Those guys are like
100 years old now.
17
00:00:27,678 --> 00:00:28,878
Oh, I think Joe
Perry's still got it.
18
00:00:28,913 --> 00:00:30,213
Hey, when we met you said I had
19
00:00:30,247 --> 00:00:31,881
a Joe Perry rock
elder statesman vibe.
20
00:00:31,916 --> 00:00:33,149
Oh, that's
'cause you kind of do.
21
00:00:33,184 --> 00:00:34,617
Yeah, you know who else has
22
00:00:34,651 --> 00:00:36,119
a Joe Perry elder rock statesman
kind of vibe?
23
00:00:36,153 --> 00:00:38,487
- Who?
- Joe [...] Perry, asshole.
24
00:00:38,522 --> 00:00:39,789
Joe Perry's got great hair.
25
00:00:39,824 --> 00:00:40,957
Hey, Steven Tyler
has great hair.
26
00:00:40,991 --> 00:00:42,125
He's got a great ass too.
27
00:00:42,159 --> 00:00:43,893
- Really?
- I'm a drummer.
28
00:00:43,928 --> 00:00:45,361
I've been looking at lead
singer's asses my whole life.
29
00:00:45,395 --> 00:00:46,795
I know what I'm
talking about.
30
00:00:46,830 --> 00:00:48,197
You really got to
get help, you know?
31
00:00:48,232 --> 00:00:50,466
Huh? How's my ass look,
by the way?
32
00:00:50,500 --> 00:00:51,800
It's okay.
33
00:00:51,835 --> 00:00:53,202
- Just okay?
- It's just okay.
34
00:00:53,237 --> 00:00:54,437
Oh, my God, and he needs help?
35
00:01:11,153 --> 00:01:15,724
Sync by Alice
www.addic7ed.com
36
00:01:21,731 --> 00:01:24,132
Mmm.
37
00:01:24,166 --> 00:01:26,368
Mmm, mmm, mmm.
38
00:01:35,577 --> 00:01:37,444
Mmm. Mmm.
39
00:01:42,884 --> 00:01:45,586
It's the ocean
40
00:01:45,620 --> 00:01:48,522
kissing the shore.
41
00:01:48,556 --> 00:01:53,193
It's a calm and it's a quiet way
42
00:01:53,827 --> 00:01:56,228
to begin a new relationship.
43
00:01:58,799 --> 00:02:00,402
Now...
44
00:02:02,436 --> 00:02:03,536
any questions?
45
00:02:03,570 --> 00:02:05,538
Yeah.
46
00:02:05,572 --> 00:02:08,608
Are you an actual doctor?
47
00:02:08,642 --> 00:02:13,379
Yes, and I also practice
therapeutic shamanism.
48
00:02:13,414 --> 00:02:14,681
Yeah, he's a witchdoctor.
That's what-
49
00:02:14,715 --> 00:02:16,282
that's what I thought.
50
00:02:16,317 --> 00:02:19,718
"Therapeutic shamanism"
is a--a healing process.
51
00:02:19,752 --> 00:02:24,556
It's based on four centuries
of Native American beliefs.
52
00:02:24,590 --> 00:02:28,927
I am a recognized member
of the Nakota Indian tribe.
53
00:02:28,961 --> 00:02:31,896
I believe a box
of yesterday's rain
54
00:02:31,931 --> 00:02:35,834
will heal
today's spiritual wound.
55
00:02:35,868 --> 00:02:37,336
I'm sorry, this--
this sounds
56
00:02:37,370 --> 00:02:39,170
like some creeped out
Grateful Dead bullshit to me.
57
00:02:39,205 --> 00:02:40,839
- I'm with Johnny on this one.
- You're with me?
58
00:02:40,873 --> 00:02:42,073
- Yes.
- Thank you, Rehab.
59
00:02:42,107 --> 00:02:43,641
- You're welcome.
- Okay.
60
00:02:43,675 --> 00:02:45,776
Listen, man,
are you an actual shrink or not?
61
00:02:45,811 --> 00:02:46,978
Can you prescribe medication?
62
00:02:47,012 --> 00:02:49,013
I am a licensed psychiatrist.
63
00:02:49,048 --> 00:02:53,985
I can prescribe any and all
FDA-approved medications
64
00:02:54,019 --> 00:02:57,255
as well as medicinal herbs.
65
00:02:57,289 --> 00:02:59,657
Yeah, I'm not with you
on this one anymore.
66
00:02:59,691 --> 00:03:01,559
It's really not
up to Johnny, Doc.
67
00:03:01,593 --> 00:03:03,127
We're all excited to be here.
68
00:03:03,162 --> 00:03:04,928
Yeah, I'm very excited
to be here, Doctor.
69
00:03:04,963 --> 00:03:06,964
I haven't been to the ocean
in, like, ten years.
70
00:03:07,248 --> 00:03:09,682
Thank God, can you imagine him
in a bathing suit?
71
00:03:09,717 --> 00:03:11,418
The fish would need
goddamn therapy.
72
00:03:11,452 --> 00:03:13,653
Okay,
I have a few food issues.
73
00:03:13,687 --> 00:03:15,989
A few? Let's try all.
You have all the issues.
74
00:03:16,023 --> 00:03:18,091
Okay, this is exactly
what I'm talking about.
75
00:03:18,126 --> 00:03:20,160
Okay, the finger pointing.
It's endless, okay.
76
00:03:20,194 --> 00:03:21,394
He's always trying
to point the finger
77
00:03:21,429 --> 00:03:22,996
at what's going on
with everybody else.
78
00:03:23,030 --> 00:03:24,897
Meanwhile, he's got a booze
and blow issue.
79
00:03:24,932 --> 00:03:26,566
No, no, no, no, no,
no, I don't have a blow issue.
80
00:03:26,601 --> 00:03:28,367
I stopped doing blow.
I have a booze and weed issue,
81
00:03:28,401 --> 00:03:29,568
and it's not an issue at all.
82
00:03:29,603 --> 00:03:31,504
It's--it's just my thing.
83
00:03:31,538 --> 00:03:33,039
Yeah, you got a pill problem.
84
00:03:33,073 --> 00:03:35,341
Uh, prescription pill problem,
85
00:03:35,375 --> 00:03:38,344
which my doctor created
to solve all my other issues.
86
00:03:38,378 --> 00:03:40,613
Doc, you see how insane
they all sound?
87
00:03:40,648 --> 00:03:42,281
Don't listen to him, okay.
88
00:03:42,315 --> 00:03:43,983
The only reason he's here--
this is my daughter.
89
00:03:44,018 --> 00:03:45,417
He's here because he wants to
have sex with her.
90
00:03:45,452 --> 00:03:46,485
- Oh, my God.
- No, that's the truth.
91
00:03:46,520 --> 00:03:47,937
No, that's not the truth.
92
00:03:47,938 --> 00:03:49,805
I'm here because I believe
in forgiveness.
93
00:03:49,839 --> 00:03:53,709
I believe that I can escape
the shackles of the past.
94
00:03:53,743 --> 00:03:55,544
Plus, Gigi is, like,
totally into me.
95
00:03:55,578 --> 00:03:57,713
Yeah, there's
your answer right there.
96
00:03:57,747 --> 00:03:59,715
Okay, you know what I think?
97
00:03:59,999 --> 00:04:01,833
I think that this band--I feel
that this band has lost sight
98
00:04:01,868 --> 00:04:05,103
completely of what made them
so unforgettable starting out,
99
00:04:05,138 --> 00:04:07,205
and now they're just hung up
on stupid resentments
100
00:04:07,239 --> 00:04:08,506
from, like, two decades ago.
101
00:04:08,541 --> 00:04:09,841
- I'm not.
- Yes, you are.
102
00:04:09,876 --> 00:04:11,442
- I am not.
- You totally are.
103
00:04:11,477 --> 00:04:14,745
Hey, I am living in the here
and now, asshole, okay?
104
00:04:14,780 --> 00:04:16,380
Your hairdo's
still stuck in 1992.
105
00:04:16,414 --> 00:04:18,248
Ooh!
106
00:04:18,283 --> 00:04:19,616
Hey, he's here to deal
with his fear of success,
107
00:04:19,651 --> 00:04:21,318
so just lay off.
108
00:04:21,352 --> 00:04:22,586
Oh, failing his
balls off in Belgium?
109
00:04:22,620 --> 00:04:24,221
What was that bullshit?
110
00:04:24,255 --> 00:04:25,990
He freaked out on stage
in front of 4,000 people.
111
00:04:26,024 --> 00:04:28,305
Because you gave him untested
tranqs and benzos, bushface.
112
00:04:28,326 --> 00:04:29,894
Yeah, because the old man
can't handle it!
113
00:04:29,928 --> 00:04:31,062
Hey, I can't hear the ocean.
114
00:04:31,096 --> 00:04:32,096
Shut up!
115
00:04:33,498 --> 00:04:38,502
Ahh...
116
00:04:42,006 --> 00:04:43,807
Relax.
117
00:04:43,841 --> 00:04:45,475
Okay?
Just let it go.
118
00:04:45,510 --> 00:04:48,378
You know,
I find this is very common
119
00:04:48,413 --> 00:04:50,447
in musical circumstances
120
00:04:50,481 --> 00:04:51,881
where members of the tribe,
121
00:04:51,916 --> 00:04:56,386
they lose their way
to anger and to envy,
122
00:04:56,421 --> 00:04:58,387
but fortunately,
123
00:04:58,422 --> 00:05:01,023
I am deeply trained
in the art of soul retrieval.
124
00:05:01,057 --> 00:05:03,826
I can heal all of these issues.
125
00:05:03,860 --> 00:05:06,729
I can heal the food
and the alcohol
126
00:05:06,763 --> 00:05:08,598
and the drugs, you know,
127
00:05:08,632 --> 00:05:12,835
'cause all of these things
are all related to an emotion.
128
00:05:12,869 --> 00:05:14,803
Now, the way I like to work is,
129
00:05:14,838 --> 00:05:17,973
I want to have these
individual sessions, okay.
130
00:05:18,007 --> 00:05:20,443
All of you
in your own work environment,
131
00:05:20,477 --> 00:05:22,177
and you're gonna heal.
132
00:05:22,212 --> 00:05:24,179
I can feel the heal.
133
00:05:24,214 --> 00:05:26,381
You got any questions?
134
00:05:26,415 --> 00:05:28,884
Yeah, can you get your hands
on some kick-ass peyote buttons
135
00:05:28,918 --> 00:05:30,986
for medicinal purposes?
136
00:05:34,187 --> 00:05:35,543
_
137
00:05:35,568 --> 00:05:36,768
Oh, my God.
I have so much I'd--
138
00:05:36,793 --> 00:05:38,159
that I want to say.
139
00:05:38,194 --> 00:05:39,894
Okay, I know, I'm so--
I'm excited.
140
00:05:39,929 --> 00:05:42,063
Okay, so do I just--
do I just talk?
141
00:05:42,097 --> 00:05:43,432
Just start talking?
142
00:05:43,466 --> 00:05:44,399
Open.
143
00:05:44,434 --> 00:05:46,601
Okay, okay, great.
144
00:05:46,636 --> 00:05:48,570
So...
145
00:05:48,604 --> 00:05:51,773
What's Steven Tyler
really like?
146
00:05:51,808 --> 00:05:54,343
I'm so happy to be here.
147
00:05:54,377 --> 00:05:57,111
I'm happy you're here too.
148
00:05:57,146 --> 00:05:59,614
Those lips, mmm.
149
00:05:59,649 --> 00:06:02,450
It's like he's wearing a vagina
on his face.
150
00:06:10,325 --> 00:06:12,260
Who is that on your T-shirt?
151
00:06:13,394 --> 00:06:15,796
Oh, that's me.
152
00:06:15,831 --> 00:06:18,132
It's one of my old bands.
153
00:06:18,167 --> 00:06:19,433
It's cool, right?
154
00:06:19,468 --> 00:06:22,103
There you are,
and there you are.
155
00:06:22,137 --> 00:06:23,504
You thought about that?
156
00:06:23,538 --> 00:06:25,439
It's just a cool T-shirt, man.
157
00:06:26,074 --> 00:06:30,778
I'm afraid
almost all of the time,
158
00:06:30,812 --> 00:06:33,647
and I don't think that anyone
else in the band knows that.
159
00:06:33,682 --> 00:06:37,284
Johnny--Johnny tagged me
with that name, you know,
160
00:06:37,318 --> 00:06:39,787
'cause I was in and out
of rehab all the time.
161
00:06:39,821 --> 00:06:41,955
I--and you know what,
I hate the name.
162
00:06:41,990 --> 00:06:45,158
So shallow, and I'm not
a shallow person, Doc.
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00:06:45,193 --> 00:06:46,994
I'm deep.
164
00:06:47,028 --> 00:06:51,331
Have you thought about
being a man
165
00:06:51,366 --> 00:06:56,003
who has to wear a picture
of himself to remind others
166
00:06:56,037 --> 00:06:58,338
that he is a man?
167
00:06:58,373 --> 00:07:00,140
I'm not real comfortable
with this face to face thing.
168
00:07:00,174 --> 00:07:01,975
Can I--can I lay down?
169
00:07:02,010 --> 00:07:03,444
Isn't that the more
traditional thing?
170
00:07:03,478 --> 00:07:05,112
I don't know,
I think that the band
171
00:07:05,146 --> 00:07:06,680
and my dad, I think
they think I'm really tough,
172
00:07:06,715 --> 00:07:08,449
that nothing really gets to me,
173
00:07:08,483 --> 00:07:10,117
but really I'm just freaking out
in my head all day.
174
00:07:10,151 --> 00:07:11,451
Which is why I'm terrified
to do drugs.
175
00:07:11,485 --> 00:07:12,886
I won't do drugs, you know,
176
00:07:12,921 --> 00:07:14,321
because I'd probably
just kill myself.
177
00:07:14,355 --> 00:07:15,355
Doing--I mean, I'm not-
178
00:07:15,390 --> 00:07:16,823
I'm not gonna kill myself.
179
00:07:16,857 --> 00:07:18,525
You're not gonna
write that down, right,
180
00:07:18,559 --> 00:07:19,993
'cause that would be so awkward
if we were, like,
181
00:07:20,028 --> 00:07:20,994
reading this back
to each other, and then
182
00:07:21,029 --> 00:07:22,329
you said I was suicidal.
183
00:07:22,363 --> 00:07:24,131
Doc, let me ask
you a question.
184
00:07:24,165 --> 00:07:26,800
Okay, just answer me honestly.
185
00:07:26,834 --> 00:07:27,834
Okay.
186
00:07:27,868 --> 00:07:29,336
How old do you think I am?
187
00:07:29,370 --> 00:07:31,204
If I'm picking up
on the right vibe here,
188
00:07:31,239 --> 00:07:32,172
I'm getting the sense--
189
00:07:32,206 --> 00:07:33,506
Like 30-something?
190
00:07:33,541 --> 00:07:34,674
Late 30s?
191
00:07:34,708 --> 00:07:36,676
- Not that kind of vibe.
- Oh.
192
00:07:36,710 --> 00:07:38,278
I'm like a vessel.
193
00:07:38,313 --> 00:07:43,951
I walk the earth,
and I breathe it in,
194
00:07:43,985 --> 00:07:45,918
and I absorb it.
195
00:07:45,953 --> 00:07:47,386
I'm not really like
a vessel, am I.
196
00:07:47,421 --> 00:07:51,290
I'm more like a--a sponge.
197
00:07:51,325 --> 00:07:52,325
What are you writing?
198
00:07:52,326 --> 00:07:53,725
"Sponge."
199
00:07:53,760 --> 00:07:55,894
Yeah, but you know, "vessel"
sounds cooler.
200
00:07:55,929 --> 00:07:57,696
Then I'll write "vessel."
201
00:07:57,730 --> 00:07:59,765
I had three dads growing up.
202
00:07:59,799 --> 00:08:01,567
My real dad was a--
203
00:08:01,601 --> 00:08:04,803
a bookie
and a raging alcoholic.
204
00:08:04,838 --> 00:08:06,538
I'm really interested
in family...
205
00:08:06,573 --> 00:08:08,206
Mm-hmm.
206
00:08:08,240 --> 00:08:09,575
And you have a family.
207
00:08:09,609 --> 00:08:12,578
It's a band,
and are you aware of the--
208
00:08:12,612 --> 00:08:14,546
the dysfunction
of your family?
209
00:08:17,584 --> 00:08:21,252
My first stepdad was an alchie
and a cokehead.
210
00:08:21,287 --> 00:08:23,021
Mm-hmm.
211
00:08:23,055 --> 00:08:24,422
Stepdad number two--
212
00:08:24,457 --> 00:08:25,624
Was he an alcoholic?
213
00:08:25,658 --> 00:08:27,058
No. Cop.
214
00:08:27,093 --> 00:08:30,729
He actually busted
the other two dads.
215
00:08:30,763 --> 00:08:33,799
Do you feel at peace?
216
00:08:33,833 --> 00:08:35,100
Johnny?
217
00:08:36,402 --> 00:08:37,970
Johnny?
218
00:08:40,629 --> 00:08:42,140
_
219
00:08:42,141 --> 00:08:44,109
Greg Dulli stole my vibe.
220
00:08:44,143 --> 00:08:46,144
Dave Grohl stole my aura.
221
00:08:46,178 --> 00:08:47,278
And this whole thing with Flash,
222
00:08:47,313 --> 00:08:48,679
sometimes I'm--
223
00:08:48,714 --> 00:08:50,781
I'm nervous that the only thing
224
00:08:50,816 --> 00:08:53,151
that's drawing me
to him is that, you know,
225
00:08:53,185 --> 00:08:56,121
is that father figure
I never had.
226
00:08:56,155 --> 00:08:58,956
Makes me look, what?
37?
227
00:08:58,991 --> 00:09:00,791
You said you're--you're
practiced in the art
228
00:09:00,826 --> 00:09:01,726
of soul retrieval, right?
229
00:09:01,760 --> 00:09:03,128
- Mm-hmm.
- Yeah.
230
00:09:03,162 --> 00:09:04,896
Can you suck my vibe
back out of Dulli
231
00:09:04,930 --> 00:09:08,233
and my aura out
of Dave Grohl's asshole, huh?
232
00:09:08,267 --> 00:09:10,902
Have you seen
Steven Tyler naked?
233
00:09:10,936 --> 00:09:12,570
I mean, besides emotionally.
234
00:09:12,604 --> 00:09:14,272
What are my triggers?
235
00:09:14,306 --> 00:09:19,176
I don't know, pepperoni pizza,
jelly doughnuts, cake.
236
00:09:19,210 --> 00:09:21,111
I like salmon.
I know that's weird.
237
00:09:21,146 --> 00:09:23,014
Not that fattening,
but if you eat the whole thing.
238
00:09:23,048 --> 00:09:26,083
This is the first time I've
ever had a family all together,
239
00:09:26,117 --> 00:09:30,187
and it would be--you know,
240
00:09:30,221 --> 00:09:32,189
worse than not getting famous
or anything like that;
241
00:09:32,223 --> 00:09:34,191
It'd be really devastating
if that fell apart.
242
00:09:34,225 --> 00:09:38,663
You know, the Jonah complex
is about destiny,
243
00:09:38,697 --> 00:09:44,201
and maybe your destiny
wasn't to be a rock star.
244
00:09:44,235 --> 00:09:49,740
Maybe it was just
to be a good father.
245
00:09:49,775 --> 00:09:51,576
Really?
246
00:09:51,610 --> 00:09:53,009
You're strong.
247
00:09:55,380 --> 00:09:56,680
Maybe too strong.
248
00:09:56,714 --> 00:09:58,148
Do I look ugly right now?
249
00:09:58,183 --> 00:09:59,483
You're very beautiful.
250
00:09:59,517 --> 00:10:00,517
No, but I look shitty
when I cry.
251
00:10:00,552 --> 00:10:01,685
I don't look like--
252
00:10:01,719 --> 00:10:02,652
I don't look like Claire Danes,
253
00:10:02,687 --> 00:10:03,720
but I look pretty [...] bad.
254
00:10:06,958 --> 00:10:08,992
You're very beautiful.
255
00:10:09,026 --> 00:10:10,961
Are you hitting on me?
256
00:10:19,435 --> 00:10:22,603
Each band
has a family dynamic,
257
00:10:22,638 --> 00:10:28,442
and this family, it seems to me,
has lost its communal bond.
258
00:10:28,477 --> 00:10:31,179
Now, this Nakota ritual,
which I call "the egg and I,"
259
00:10:31,213 --> 00:10:34,114
is designed
to restore that bond.
260
00:10:34,149 --> 00:10:38,286
Now, the goal is
to take each delicate egg
261
00:10:38,320 --> 00:10:40,754
and pass it from person
to person,
262
00:10:40,789 --> 00:10:44,391
and then put back safely
in its nest.
263
00:10:44,425 --> 00:10:48,796
Each egg represents
a family member,
264
00:10:48,830 --> 00:10:53,200
and if it breaks,
so does that family member.
265
00:10:53,234 --> 00:10:54,234
Questions?
266
00:10:54,268 --> 00:10:55,769
Yeah, why is my egg weird?
267
00:10:55,804 --> 00:10:57,270
All the eggs are the same.
268
00:10:57,305 --> 00:10:58,806
- Mine's not.
- They're the same.
269
00:10:58,840 --> 00:11:00,741
Maybe it's weird
because you're different, bro.
270
00:11:00,775 --> 00:11:02,209
Well, I want my egg
to be different.
271
00:11:02,243 --> 00:11:03,844
Why don't you
try dyeing it black?
272
00:11:05,947 --> 00:11:10,449
It doesn't really matter
what color the eggs are, okay?
273
00:11:10,483 --> 00:11:13,585
So, Bam,
start with the first egg,
274
00:11:13,620 --> 00:11:15,955
and pass it around the room.
275
00:11:15,989 --> 00:11:18,224
Sure. Thanks.
276
00:11:18,258 --> 00:11:19,959
- Come on, Bam Bam.
- You got this.
277
00:11:19,993 --> 00:11:21,460
I'm gonna pick Johnny.
278
00:11:21,494 --> 00:11:23,262
Oh, cool.
279
00:11:23,297 --> 00:11:26,933
Okay, nice and delicate.
280
00:11:26,967 --> 00:11:29,034
You got it.
281
00:11:29,068 --> 00:11:30,368
Pick it up.
282
00:11:32,672 --> 00:11:36,341
- Don't make a thing out of it.
- I'm not.
283
00:11:36,375 --> 00:11:37,976
- Oh!
- Shit!
284
00:11:38,010 --> 00:11:39,511
Did you do that on purpose?
285
00:11:39,546 --> 00:11:41,179
- Give me the goddamn eggs.
- No, no, no--oh!
286
00:11:41,213 --> 00:11:42,848
- Oh now, I got one--oh!
- Oh!
287
00:11:42,882 --> 00:11:45,050
That was not elegant.
288
00:11:45,084 --> 00:11:46,819
Oh, look.
289
00:11:46,853 --> 00:11:48,754
Mine wasn't different.
It was special.
290
00:11:51,557 --> 00:11:54,326
Don't...
291
00:11:54,360 --> 00:11:55,994
You are a hateful person.
292
00:11:58,064 --> 00:12:02,434
Last night I spoke
to Ava and Rehab,
293
00:12:02,468 --> 00:12:04,269
Bam...
294
00:12:04,303 --> 00:12:08,306
And I told them
that I would like to initiate
295
00:12:08,341 --> 00:12:11,943
a ritual called "hear my voice."
296
00:12:11,978 --> 00:12:13,143
Now, this allows
297
00:12:13,178 --> 00:12:16,013
the less powerful members
of the tribe
298
00:12:16,047 --> 00:12:21,352
to express their feelings
and or frustrations
299
00:12:21,386 --> 00:12:22,987
through music.
300
00:12:23,021 --> 00:12:26,323
They're gonna share,
and you're gonna listen,
301
00:12:26,358 --> 00:12:29,193
and my God,
you're gonna digest.
302
00:12:29,227 --> 00:12:31,195
Okay.
303
00:12:31,229 --> 00:12:33,897
Bam.
304
00:12:33,931 --> 00:12:35,466
This drumsong--
305
00:12:35,500 --> 00:12:38,369
one word, drumsong--
306
00:12:38,403 --> 00:12:41,705
is called Dad.
307
00:12:41,739 --> 00:12:43,707
One, two, three, four.
308
00:12:51,248 --> 00:12:53,550
♪ Baby, please don't go down
to New Orleans ♪
309
00:12:53,584 --> 00:12:54,718
♪ You know I love you so
310
00:12:54,752 --> 00:12:57,053
♪ Baby, please don't go
311
00:13:11,434 --> 00:13:13,869
Dad, Dad, Dad!
Johnny!
312
00:13:13,904 --> 00:13:15,538
Mom!
Dad!
313
00:13:15,572 --> 00:13:17,740
♪ And down low
314
00:13:37,159 --> 00:13:38,225
Part one.
315
00:13:44,166 --> 00:13:46,901
Ah, Ma!
316
00:13:52,139 --> 00:13:54,841
This exercise is called
The Fame Game.
317
00:13:54,876 --> 00:13:56,109
Cool.
318
00:13:56,143 --> 00:13:58,144
- I am gonna hold up a card...
- Right.
319
00:13:58,179 --> 00:14:00,013
- And you have three seconds...
- Okay.
320
00:14:00,048 --> 00:14:01,682
To tell me
who this famous person is.
321
00:14:01,716 --> 00:14:03,083
- Right, yeah.
- From when you hold it out?
322
00:14:03,117 --> 00:14:04,117
Three seconds
from when you hold it up?
323
00:14:04,151 --> 00:14:05,285
- Three.
- Yes.
324
00:14:05,319 --> 00:14:06,286
Okay.
Okay, okay, and--and--
325
00:14:06,320 --> 00:14:07,353
and who's keeping score?
326
00:14:07,388 --> 00:14:08,555
There's no score.
327
00:14:08,590 --> 00:14:09,522
But then how do we know
who wins?
328
00:14:09,557 --> 00:14:10,624
There's no winner.
329
00:14:10,658 --> 00:14:11,625
No, no,
you said it was a game.
330
00:14:11,659 --> 00:14:13,126
It's a mind game.
331
00:14:13,160 --> 00:14:14,127
Is it a game to see
who's the smartest?
332
00:14:14,161 --> 00:14:15,528
No.
333
00:14:15,563 --> 00:14:16,964
- Is it to see who's hippest...
- No.
334
00:14:16,998 --> 00:14:17,964
Because I'm--I'm way
hipper than him.
335
00:14:17,998 --> 00:14:19,398
You're hipper than me?
336
00:14:19,432 --> 00:14:20,933
- That's hilarious.
- Oh, my God.
337
00:14:20,968 --> 00:14:22,301
I am so much more celebrity
savvy than you are, Dad.
338
00:14:22,335 --> 00:14:23,836
She thought Paul Newman
was a chef.
339
00:14:23,870 --> 00:14:25,270
- He is, technically.
- He--he was, he's dead.
340
00:14:26,506 --> 00:14:27,506
All right, okay.
341
00:14:27,540 --> 00:14:28,941
His products live on.
342
00:14:28,976 --> 00:14:30,456
Let's just do the exercise,
all right?
343
00:14:30,477 --> 00:14:31,777
- Are we ready to begin?
- Okay. Yeah, please.
344
00:14:31,812 --> 00:14:34,113
Okay.
345
00:14:34,147 --> 00:14:35,681
Beatles.
346
00:14:35,716 --> 00:14:37,083
Cary Grant.
347
00:14:37,117 --> 00:14:38,084
Oh, I can't believe
you know him.
348
00:14:38,118 --> 00:14:39,184
I'm a celeb sav, Dad.
349
00:14:39,219 --> 00:14:40,252
Oh, you're a celeb sav.
350
00:14:40,286 --> 00:14:42,622
Jon Stewart.
351
00:14:42,656 --> 00:14:43,822
Jeff Harrison.
352
00:14:43,856 --> 00:14:45,156
George Harrison, savvy.
353
00:14:45,190 --> 00:14:47,325
I said--I said--
I think I said George.
354
00:14:47,359 --> 00:14:48,660
Lindsay Lohan.
355
00:14:48,694 --> 00:14:49,828
That's Chloe Moretz,
you idiot.
356
00:14:49,862 --> 00:14:51,295
What--what does she do?
357
00:14:51,330 --> 00:14:52,697
Not look like Lindsay Lohan
for one thing.
358
00:14:52,732 --> 00:14:53,832
She looks a lot
like Lindsay Lohan.
359
00:14:53,866 --> 00:14:55,333
You're so savvy.
360
00:14:55,367 --> 00:14:56,367
Tom Selleck.
361
00:14:56,401 --> 00:14:58,503
Burt Reynolds.
362
00:14:58,537 --> 00:14:59,738
Oh, Johnny Carson.
363
00:14:59,772 --> 00:15:01,006
That's Lee Marvin.
Huge.
364
00:15:01,040 --> 00:15:02,140
Looks like a sweaty
Johnny Carson.
365
00:15:02,174 --> 00:15:05,276
Okay, whatever.
366
00:15:05,310 --> 00:15:06,811
Good picture of Johnny Carson?
367
00:15:06,846 --> 00:15:08,647
That is Steve McQueen, okay.
368
00:15:08,681 --> 00:15:10,481
The King of Cool, okay.
369
00:15:10,516 --> 00:15:12,850
Legend of the screen
and the racetrack.
370
00:15:12,884 --> 00:15:13,984
How awesome does he look
in those sunglasses?
371
00:15:14,019 --> 00:15:15,286
He looks so awesome.
372
00:15:15,320 --> 00:15:16,420
You want to know
something interesting?
373
00:15:16,455 --> 00:15:17,495
My Steve McQueen is black.
374
00:15:17,523 --> 00:15:18,956
- Oh, really?
- Yeah.
375
00:15:18,990 --> 00:15:20,858
I--I--the guy--the short guy
from Key & Peele.
376
00:15:20,892 --> 00:15:21,992
I don't know which guy he is,
but he's the short guy.
377
00:15:22,027 --> 00:15:23,161
That's my Steve McQueen, okay.
378
00:15:23,195 --> 00:15:24,895
He's an Oscar-winning director.
379
00:15:24,929 --> 00:15:27,665
He made an amazing movie about a
black man escaping from slavery.
380
00:15:27,699 --> 00:15:29,534
Oh, well, my Steve McQueen
made a great movie
381
00:15:29,568 --> 00:15:31,735
about a white guy escaping
a Nazi--Nazi prison camp.
382
00:15:31,770 --> 00:15:33,337
Oh, about a white guy.
Racist.
383
00:15:33,372 --> 00:15:34,705
- Okay, how is it racist?
- Did your guy win an Oscar?
384
00:15:34,739 --> 00:15:35,906
My guy is in
the Motocross Hall of Fame.
385
00:15:35,940 --> 00:15:37,708
Oh, I'm being an asshole.
386
00:15:37,742 --> 00:15:38,709
Did your guy win an Oscar?
Oh, he didn't win an Oscar.
387
00:15:38,743 --> 00:15:40,177
I'm so sorry.
388
00:15:40,211 --> 00:15:41,679
Okay, okay, this exercise
is over. It's over.
389
00:15:41,713 --> 00:15:42,713
Who won?
390
00:15:42,714 --> 00:15:46,083
You both failed this game.
391
00:15:48,753 --> 00:15:51,255
You win by talking
to each other.
392
00:15:51,489 --> 00:15:56,759
You win by sharing 'cause
that is where real victory lies.
393
00:15:56,794 --> 00:15:58,195
What did we learn?
394
00:15:58,229 --> 00:15:59,829
Well, there's two
Steve McQueens.
395
00:15:59,863 --> 00:16:01,098
The Steve McQueens.
I had no idea there were two.
396
00:16:01,132 --> 00:16:04,734
I think we learned that fame
397
00:16:04,768 --> 00:16:06,603
is very, very fleeting.
398
00:16:06,637 --> 00:16:09,639
You want the world to know
your name
399
00:16:09,673 --> 00:16:11,641
even at the expense
400
00:16:11,675 --> 00:16:13,876
of those who really do love you:
401
00:16:14,711 --> 00:16:16,045
your families.
402
00:16:16,180 --> 00:16:18,881
Within which,
and this is ironic,
403
00:16:18,916 --> 00:16:21,918
you could be famous forever.
404
00:16:21,952 --> 00:16:24,087
Now, John, tomorrow morning
405
00:16:24,121 --> 00:16:28,357
I want you to make amends
with the band.
406
00:16:28,391 --> 00:16:31,961
Let your sins be forgiven
for the past
407
00:16:31,995 --> 00:16:35,564
so that you can begin
the healing tomorrow.
408
00:16:35,599 --> 00:16:36,959
Pretty sure I beat you
six to five,
409
00:16:36,967 --> 00:16:38,234
by the way.
410
00:16:38,268 --> 00:16:39,301
No way in hell.
411
00:16:39,336 --> 00:16:40,902
I was counting
with my fingers.
412
00:16:44,489 --> 00:16:45,989
The day has come.
413
00:16:46,014 --> 00:16:49,183
Today, we are going
to open the floor
414
00:16:49,717 --> 00:16:54,421
to an open and clear
conversation, okay?
415
00:16:54,456 --> 00:16:55,489
Who wants to go first?
416
00:16:55,523 --> 00:16:56,990
- Oh, me.
- Ava.
417
00:16:57,324 --> 00:17:00,026
I would like more ukulele
in the band.
418
00:17:00,061 --> 00:17:02,195
It's a fun instrument,
and it makes people happy.
419
00:17:02,230 --> 00:17:03,329
Who votes yes?
420
00:17:03,364 --> 00:17:05,030
I vote yes on the ukulele
421
00:17:05,065 --> 00:17:08,433
if you vote yes
on my tribal drumsong.
422
00:17:08,468 --> 00:17:09,869
Gigi?
423
00:17:09,903 --> 00:17:10,936
Yes.
424
00:17:10,971 --> 00:17:12,271
Ah, terrific.
425
00:17:12,305 --> 00:17:15,507
Terrific.
This is great.
426
00:17:15,541 --> 00:17:18,043
John, do you have anything
427
00:17:18,078 --> 00:17:21,213
you would like to say
to the rest of the tribe?
428
00:17:21,248 --> 00:17:24,216
Yes.
429
00:17:24,251 --> 00:17:25,284
Flash.
430
00:17:25,318 --> 00:17:26,518
What?
431
00:17:26,552 --> 00:17:29,789
I apologize for sleeping
with your wife.
432
00:17:29,823 --> 00:17:33,825
It was a selfish lapse
in judgment on my part.
433
00:17:33,859 --> 00:17:35,661
Well, it's about time.
434
00:17:35,695 --> 00:17:36,995
I know.
435
00:17:37,029 --> 00:17:40,231
Okay, hey, you're making
some change.
436
00:17:40,266 --> 00:17:42,534
22 years later,
but I accept your apology.
437
00:17:42,568 --> 00:17:44,336
- Thank you.
- Oh, give me a goddamn break.
438
00:17:44,370 --> 00:17:46,905
She slept with everybody,
plus she was way into Johnny.
439
00:17:46,939 --> 00:17:48,674
Who said she was into Johnny?
440
00:17:48,708 --> 00:17:50,108
She did.
441
00:17:50,142 --> 00:17:51,242
To who?
442
00:17:51,277 --> 00:17:53,779
- To Rehab.
- When?
443
00:17:53,813 --> 00:17:55,180
I'd rather not say.
444
00:17:55,214 --> 00:17:56,782
Oh, you son of a bitch.
445
00:17:56,816 --> 00:17:58,517
She was a giant flaming whore.
446
00:17:58,551 --> 00:18:00,051
And let me tell you
something else.
447
00:18:00,085 --> 00:18:01,353
She's the only reason
he wants to sleep with you,
448
00:18:01,387 --> 00:18:02,454
to get back at me.
449
00:18:02,488 --> 00:18:03,721
That's what's really going on.
450
00:18:03,755 --> 00:18:04,988
- That's true.
- Is that true?
451
00:18:05,023 --> 00:18:06,183
- No. Yes, I'm--
- Oh, my God!
452
00:18:06,191 --> 00:18:07,458
Why would you admit that?
453
00:18:07,492 --> 00:18:08,726
He showed me the picture,
454
00:18:08,760 --> 00:18:10,227
and then it was
in the beginning.
455
00:18:13,264 --> 00:18:14,998
Enough!
Jesus H. Christ.
456
00:18:15,033 --> 00:18:16,266
What is going on here?
457
00:18:16,301 --> 00:18:17,768
All of you assholes
458
00:18:17,803 --> 00:18:20,838
were gonna let me play ukulele
live onstage,
459
00:18:20,872 --> 00:18:23,507
and you want to talk
about your hurt feelings
460
00:18:23,542 --> 00:18:24,575
and your resentments.
461
00:18:24,609 --> 00:18:27,010
Oh, boo-hoo.
462
00:18:27,045 --> 00:18:28,278
Ava, I think that--
463
00:18:28,313 --> 00:18:30,013
Shut up, Yanni.
464
00:18:30,048 --> 00:18:32,014
This ain't no democracy,
okay.
465
00:18:32,049 --> 00:18:34,584
It's a dictatorship
always on the verge
466
00:18:34,618 --> 00:18:36,353
of a military coup
467
00:18:36,387 --> 00:18:38,855
'cause that's how
rock and roll bands work.
468
00:18:38,889 --> 00:18:40,390
That never-ending struggle,
469
00:18:40,424 --> 00:18:42,692
Mick versus Keith,
Joe versus Steven,
470
00:18:42,727 --> 00:18:44,494
Johnny versus Flash.
471
00:18:44,528 --> 00:18:48,631
It's that struggle,
that's what makes the magic.
472
00:18:48,666 --> 00:18:51,300
Johnny was king,
and I'm sorry, baby,
473
00:18:51,335 --> 00:18:54,904
but you have been dethroned
by Queen Gigi the First,
474
00:18:54,938 --> 00:18:59,108
and the only feelings
I care about are hers.
475
00:18:59,142 --> 00:19:04,713
So, Gigi, how do you
really feel about the ukulele?
476
00:19:07,317 --> 00:19:12,554
I hate that goddamn midget
Game of Thrones guitar.
477
00:19:12,589 --> 00:19:16,125
Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!
478
00:19:16,159 --> 00:19:17,693
Fricking thing was
giving me hand cramps,
479
00:19:17,727 --> 00:19:21,463
and, Gigi, how do you
feel about drumsong?
480
00:19:21,498 --> 00:19:23,999
Okay, "drum" is a word.
481
00:19:24,033 --> 00:19:25,567
"Song" is a word.
482
00:19:25,602 --> 00:19:27,135
- "Drumsong" is not a word.
- It's a word.
483
00:19:27,169 --> 00:19:28,637
- It's not a word!
- If I--I said it!
484
00:19:28,671 --> 00:19:30,839
It's not a word.
485
00:19:33,276 --> 00:19:34,276
Wait a minute!
486
00:19:34,310 --> 00:19:37,513
- Whoa!
- Wait.
487
00:19:37,847 --> 00:19:40,648
I disagree with all this.
488
00:19:40,683 --> 00:19:42,050
The doctor has a point.
489
00:19:42,085 --> 00:19:45,087
We can change.
I changed.
490
00:19:45,121 --> 00:19:46,822
Look, I changed my diet.
491
00:19:46,856 --> 00:19:49,324
The doc put me on no sugar,
no carbs,
492
00:19:49,358 --> 00:19:51,058
and thank your wife
for the green beans, by the way.
493
00:19:51,093 --> 00:19:52,626
These are so fresh and good.
494
00:19:52,660 --> 00:19:54,028
You're doing great.
495
00:19:54,062 --> 00:19:55,096
And Flash changed.
496
00:19:55,130 --> 00:19:56,097
Look, he changed his hair.
497
00:19:56,131 --> 00:19:57,664
Twice.
498
00:19:57,699 --> 00:19:59,666
Bam Bam, I just--I'm so glad
there's someone
499
00:19:59,701 --> 00:20:01,468
whose soul
is still retrievable here,
500
00:20:01,502 --> 00:20:02,703
and thank you.
501
00:20:02,738 --> 00:20:05,840
Pepperoni pizza
for a Mr. Bam Bam?
502
00:20:07,843 --> 00:20:10,611
Is there a Bam Bam?
503
00:20:10,646 --> 00:20:13,447
I told you
to call me from downstairs
504
00:20:13,481 --> 00:20:15,416
and I'd meet you
in the alley.
505
00:20:15,450 --> 00:20:17,184
It's a pizza, man.
It's not a bag of blow, bro.
506
00:20:17,218 --> 00:20:18,485
Relax.
507
00:20:18,520 --> 00:20:20,755
That's it!
God, I--I can't.
508
00:20:20,789 --> 00:20:21,789
I'm out. I'm out.
509
00:20:21,822 --> 00:20:24,525
I mean, you people
are the worst.
510
00:20:24,559 --> 00:20:26,960
You're like a symphony
of narcissism.
511
00:20:26,994 --> 00:20:28,628
I actually think you're
all untreatable.
512
00:20:28,663 --> 00:20:30,164
I mean, you.
513
00:20:30,198 --> 00:20:31,365
- You're like an egomaniac.
- Hey, hey.
514
00:20:31,399 --> 00:20:32,399
See, I told you.
515
00:20:32,400 --> 00:20:34,734
Oh, shut up!
You!
516
00:20:34,769 --> 00:20:38,072
You never for a moment
looked a day under 50.
517
00:20:38,106 --> 00:20:39,806
You know something?
518
00:20:39,840 --> 00:20:43,043
You guys, you're like ten times
worse than Metallica,
519
00:20:43,078 --> 00:20:46,146
Kings of Leon,
and Aerosmith combined.
520
00:20:46,181 --> 00:20:48,048
I actually think--
no, no, I know.
521
00:20:48,083 --> 00:20:49,415
I know.
522
00:20:49,450 --> 00:20:53,920
You are all truly
the most [...] up band
523
00:20:53,955 --> 00:20:57,390
in the history of rock and roll.
524
00:20:57,424 --> 00:20:58,625
What are you looking at?
525
00:21:05,199 --> 00:21:06,265
Wow.
526
00:21:09,269 --> 00:21:11,571
We're the most [...] up band
in the history of rock and roll!
527
00:21:13,607 --> 00:21:15,874
Kiss my ass, Aerosmith!
528
00:21:15,909 --> 00:21:17,409
- Bring it in, man!
- Nice!
529
00:21:17,443 --> 00:21:18,577
Screw Metallica.
530
00:21:18,612 --> 00:21:20,545
Come on, let's jam.
Come on,
531
00:21:20,580 --> 00:21:22,514
Let's make a trail of
disgusted unhappy people around--
532
00:21:22,548 --> 00:21:24,216
Yeah.
533
00:21:24,250 --> 00:21:26,885
Do you understand how close
we just came to having a ukulele
534
00:21:26,920 --> 00:21:27,987
in this rock band?
535
00:21:28,021 --> 00:21:29,655
I know.
536
00:21:29,689 --> 00:21:31,423
You just learned a very valuable
lesson about rock and roll.
537
00:21:31,457 --> 00:21:32,725
And what's that?
538
00:21:32,759 --> 00:21:34,459
Great bands
are full of talented people,
539
00:21:34,494 --> 00:21:35,761
and most talented people
540
00:21:35,795 --> 00:21:39,097
are vain, egomaniacal,
insecure assholes.
541
00:21:39,132 --> 00:21:40,798
This is something that
you should be an expert on.
542
00:21:40,833 --> 00:21:42,367
Exactly, okay.
543
00:21:42,401 --> 00:21:43,602
The key is to be
the biggest asshole
544
00:21:43,636 --> 00:21:45,137
with the loudest microphone.
545
00:21:45,171 --> 00:21:47,239
What about the stuff
that Dr. Ball said about me
546
00:21:47,273 --> 00:21:48,706
and about, you know, family?
547
00:21:48,741 --> 00:21:51,276
Yes.
548
00:21:51,310 --> 00:21:52,611
Which part of--
what'd he say?
549
00:21:52,645 --> 00:21:54,146
Oh, my God. Ugh.
550
00:21:54,180 --> 00:21:55,747
I just want to make sure
we're on the same page.
551
00:21:55,781 --> 00:21:59,984
Okay, he said that family
is more important than fame.
552
00:22:00,019 --> 00:22:01,886
Right.
553
00:22:01,920 --> 00:22:02,987
Which is kind of
total bullshit
554
00:22:03,022 --> 00:22:04,523
when you're dealing
with a band.
555
00:22:04,557 --> 00:22:05,923
I guess it doesn't
really apply, does it?
556
00:22:05,958 --> 00:22:07,725
Well, unless we make
this family into something
557
00:22:07,760 --> 00:22:09,093
worthwhile, it's not--yeah.
558
00:22:09,128 --> 00:22:10,361
Let's just take it
for what it is.
559
00:22:10,395 --> 00:22:11,595
- Okay.
- Okay.
560
00:22:11,630 --> 00:22:12,696
- Let's sing.
- All right.
561
00:22:12,730 --> 00:22:13,631
- All right?
- Okay.
562
00:22:13,665 --> 00:22:14,665
- Okay.
- Good talk.
563
00:22:14,666 --> 00:22:15,699
Hey!
564
00:22:39,641 --> 00:22:43,641
Sync by Alice
www.addic7ed.com