1 00:00:05,082 --> 00:00:06,832 Previously on Masters Of Sex... 2 00:00:06,867 --> 00:00:09,118 Joy: He showed me three apartments just today. 3 00:00:09,170 --> 00:00:12,554 We talked about this, Libby-- our dissatisfaction. 4 00:00:12,590 --> 00:00:13,589 Libby: Yes, but it was just talk. 5 00:00:13,624 --> 00:00:14,790 Paul: It's Joy. 6 00:00:14,825 --> 00:00:16,158 She... She collapsed. 7 00:00:16,193 --> 00:00:19,228 "Catastrophic" was the word they kept using. 8 00:00:19,263 --> 00:00:20,496 Johnny: I don't want to talk about it. 9 00:00:20,531 --> 00:00:21,630 William: Well, what you want isn't the issue. 10 00:00:21,665 --> 00:00:23,766 Johnny: I just said, so shut up about it! 11 00:00:23,834 --> 00:00:25,334 Libby: This is not about you, Bill. 12 00:00:25,369 --> 00:00:28,804 This is about our son, and our son needs help. 13 00:00:28,839 --> 00:00:33,075 Apparently, this Dennis has been picking on him for weeks. 14 00:00:33,110 --> 00:00:35,477 You swung these knuckles into my son's face. 15 00:00:35,529 --> 00:00:39,148 I know you're smart enough to know that if a doctor-- 16 00:00:39,200 --> 00:00:42,651 if a doctor threatens you, 17 00:00:42,703 --> 00:00:44,453 no one can protect you. 18 00:00:44,488 --> 00:00:47,289 Edna: Pawning off this poor baby to some babysitter 19 00:00:47,324 --> 00:00:49,658 when you're going off to do your sex work. 20 00:00:49,693 --> 00:00:51,427 Harry: I know you feel your mother's hard on you, 21 00:00:51,462 --> 00:00:53,362 but it's because she worries. 22 00:00:53,397 --> 00:00:54,763 Virginia: She doesn't worry about me. 23 00:00:54,799 --> 00:00:56,131 Edna: I underestimated you. 24 00:00:56,167 --> 00:00:57,132 Virginia: You did? 25 00:00:57,168 --> 00:00:58,567 Edna: All you've got to do 26 00:00:58,602 --> 00:01:01,136 is get him to leave his wife and marry you. 27 00:01:01,172 --> 00:01:02,571 Dan: Are you all right? 28 00:01:02,606 --> 00:01:05,741 Virginia: How would you like to take me to dinner sometime? 29 00:01:48,089 --> 00:01:50,994 Sync and corrections by n17t01 www.addic7ed.com 30 00:01:53,857 --> 00:01:55,690 Holly: The Marshfield fair. 31 00:01:55,742 --> 00:01:57,159 Virginia: I'm sorry? 32 00:01:57,194 --> 00:01:58,577 Holly: Candy apples. 33 00:01:58,612 --> 00:02:01,113 It reminds me of when I was little, 34 00:02:01,165 --> 00:02:04,199 and my dad would buy them for me at the fair. 35 00:02:04,251 --> 00:02:08,453 They had this rich, crackly, toffee coating. 36 00:02:08,505 --> 00:02:12,457 I'm practically drooling just thinking about them. 37 00:02:12,509 --> 00:02:15,510 Virginia: Not exactly the lubrication we were looking for. 38 00:02:15,546 --> 00:02:16,344 Dan: Mnh-mnh. 39 00:02:16,380 --> 00:02:17,712 Virginia: Thank you, Holly. 40 00:02:17,764 --> 00:02:19,848 Feel free to get dressed now. 41 00:02:19,883 --> 00:02:23,635 Dan: So, smells elicit emotions rather than arousal, 42 00:02:23,687 --> 00:02:24,769 leaving us... nowhere. 43 00:02:24,805 --> 00:02:26,855 Virginia: That is the general vicinity. 44 00:02:26,890 --> 00:02:29,858 Dan: And even if we wanted emotion, 45 00:02:29,893 --> 00:02:31,443 every reaction is unique, 46 00:02:31,478 --> 00:02:34,446 meaning we'd have to customize a specific scent 47 00:02:34,481 --> 00:02:36,948 for each customer, which would be like 48 00:02:36,984 --> 00:02:39,568 moving the French Riviera one grain of sand at a time. 49 00:02:39,620 --> 00:02:42,037 Virginia: Do you know anything about gypsy moths? 50 00:02:42,072 --> 00:02:43,672 Dan: Their natural habitat is not the French Riviera. 51 00:02:43,707 --> 00:02:45,607 Virginia: No, "Nature" magazine 52 00:02:45,642 --> 00:02:48,109 published a piece on gypsy moths recently, 53 00:02:48,145 --> 00:02:50,412 about this substance that they secrete, 54 00:02:50,464 --> 00:02:52,964 called pheromones, an aphrodisiac of sorts, 55 00:02:53,000 --> 00:02:56,251 secreted by the female moths to attract the males 56 00:02:56,253 --> 00:02:57,586 at great distances. 57 00:02:57,621 --> 00:02:58,787 Dan: The length of a crowded barroom? 58 00:02:58,822 --> 00:03:01,139 Virginia: Try 30 miles. 59 00:03:01,175 --> 00:03:04,142 And the strangest thing about pheromones 60 00:03:04,178 --> 00:03:07,345 is that they're not something that you smell. 61 00:03:07,397 --> 00:03:08,563 They're sensed. 62 00:03:24,114 --> 00:03:26,948 Dan: If we can bottle the human equivalent of pheromones, 63 00:03:27,000 --> 00:03:29,918 we could have exactly what I've been looking for all along. 64 00:03:29,953 --> 00:03:31,286 A "love potion," essentially. 65 00:03:31,288 --> 00:03:33,538 Virginia: Except there's no conclusive evidence 66 00:03:33,590 --> 00:03:35,257 that human pheromones even exist, 67 00:03:35,292 --> 00:03:37,175 never mind are ready for packaging. 68 00:03:37,211 --> 00:03:38,293 Dan: Oh, they exist. 69 00:03:38,328 --> 00:03:39,661 For example, inexplicably, 70 00:03:39,696 --> 00:03:41,930 a few weeks ago, you asked me out to dinner. 71 00:03:41,965 --> 00:03:43,715 It was as if some unseen force compelled you, 72 00:03:43,767 --> 00:03:45,467 because every time I've brought it up since, 73 00:03:45,469 --> 00:03:47,135 you've managed to worm your way out of it. 74 00:03:47,187 --> 00:03:49,170 Virginia: No, I have not wormed my way out of it. 75 00:03:49,206 --> 00:03:50,839 Dan: Then have dinner with me tonight. 76 00:04:01,401 --> 00:04:04,152 Fine. Then drinks down the street at the tap room. 77 00:04:04,154 --> 00:04:05,487 Virginia: Can I just be honest with you? 78 00:04:05,539 --> 00:04:11,243 I have no idea why I asked you out that night, but... 79 00:04:11,295 --> 00:04:12,494 it was wrong. 80 00:04:18,552 --> 00:04:20,502 So why don't we have a cup of coffee, 81 00:04:20,504 --> 00:04:22,087 downstairs, in the lobby, and-- 82 00:04:22,139 --> 00:04:24,422 and we can use the time to strategize 83 00:04:24,474 --> 00:04:27,892 about how we might go about... procuring pheromones. 84 00:04:27,928 --> 00:04:31,596 Dan: We can strategize. 85 00:04:31,648 --> 00:04:35,517 But now let me be honest with you. 86 00:04:35,569 --> 00:04:41,489 You're a woman who deserves more than coffee in some lobby. 87 00:04:41,525 --> 00:04:44,292 You deserve, well... 88 00:04:44,328 --> 00:04:46,761 what we might call a proper courtship. 89 00:04:55,005 --> 00:04:57,122 William: [ Breathing heavily ] 90 00:05:09,603 --> 00:05:13,054 Paul: You're running like you've got the devil on your tail. 91 00:05:13,056 --> 00:05:14,222 Is everything all right? 92 00:05:14,274 --> 00:05:16,391 William: I was just, uh... 93 00:05:16,476 --> 00:05:20,028 I was just thinking... 94 00:05:20,063 --> 00:05:24,899 about how sometimes people seem to just... 95 00:05:24,951 --> 00:05:27,702 They'll be slipping away. 96 00:05:27,738 --> 00:05:29,904 Paul: Who's "people"? 97 00:05:29,906 --> 00:05:31,906 William: Uh... 98 00:05:31,908 --> 00:05:35,327 just my son, John, for example. 99 00:05:35,379 --> 00:05:39,998 I just asked him this morning 100 00:05:40,050 --> 00:05:42,917 if he wanted to come see a Cardinal/Bears game next Sunday. 101 00:05:42,919 --> 00:05:45,553 Paul: You got nothing, huh? 102 00:05:45,589 --> 00:05:47,305 - Wilam: Yeah. - Paul: That's funny. 103 00:05:47,341 --> 00:05:49,591 'Cause I was just talking to a former Cardinal, 104 00:05:49,626 --> 00:05:53,028 a friend, Al Neely. 105 00:05:53,063 --> 00:05:55,430 William: Al "The Ape" Neely? 106 00:05:55,482 --> 00:05:57,399 Paul: Yeah, we played together at Nebraska. 107 00:05:59,436 --> 00:06:03,488 He, uh-- he married that actress, Isabella Ricci? 108 00:06:05,776 --> 00:06:08,777 Well, anyway, she's been twisting his arm, 109 00:06:08,779 --> 00:06:11,446 trying to get him to go see somebody 110 00:06:11,448 --> 00:06:13,448 about their bedroom problems. 111 00:06:13,450 --> 00:06:16,451 They'd heard of you and, uh... about flipped 112 00:06:16,503 --> 00:06:19,037 when I told them we were neighbors. 113 00:06:19,089 --> 00:06:22,841 They wanted me to put in a good word, you know? 114 00:06:22,876 --> 00:06:24,459 Maybe-- maybe you'd see them. 115 00:06:24,461 --> 00:06:26,044 William: You don't have to put in a good word. 116 00:06:26,096 --> 00:06:27,128 Just have them call the office. 117 00:06:27,130 --> 00:06:29,798 Paul: All right, I will. 118 00:06:29,850 --> 00:06:32,384 William: You're still coaching, right? 119 00:06:32,436 --> 00:06:35,303 - Kids' football? - Paul: Yeah. 120 00:06:35,355 --> 00:06:37,222 William: You need an assistant coach? 121 00:06:39,943 --> 00:06:41,076 Paul: You? 122 00:06:41,111 --> 00:06:43,111 William: Why not? 123 00:06:43,146 --> 00:06:46,648 You know... why not try? 124 00:06:46,700 --> 00:06:49,367 If you don't try... nothing happens. 125 00:06:49,403 --> 00:06:54,456 Or... things happen that you don't want to happen. 126 00:06:54,491 --> 00:06:58,793 Anyway, uh, Johnny could run out for the team. 127 00:06:58,829 --> 00:07:00,662 I could help you coach. 128 00:07:00,714 --> 00:07:03,832 So, what do you say? 129 00:07:03,834 --> 00:07:06,134 Libby: I think it's a terrible idea. 130 00:07:06,169 --> 00:07:07,552 William: Well, I was already playing football at his age. 131 00:07:07,587 --> 00:07:08,837 It'll be good for him. 132 00:07:08,839 --> 00:07:10,271 Libby: He will be in there with boys twice his size. 133 00:07:10,307 --> 00:07:11,539 He could easily be injured. 134 00:07:11,575 --> 00:07:13,258 William: You can't mollycoddle the boy, Libby. 135 00:07:13,310 --> 00:07:14,509 Libby: Who is mollycoddling? 136 00:07:14,511 --> 00:07:16,544 I'm simply saying he is not a football player. 137 00:07:16,580 --> 00:07:18,680 William: Well, certainly not if he doesn't try. 138 00:07:18,715 --> 00:07:20,982 Libby: Bill... 139 00:07:21,017 --> 00:07:23,017 the planetarium has a wonderful film 140 00:07:23,069 --> 00:07:24,686 on the origins of the universe. 141 00:07:24,688 --> 00:07:25,854 Johnny would love that. 142 00:07:25,906 --> 00:07:27,822 William: Well, I've already promised Paul 143 00:07:27,858 --> 00:07:29,023 I'd help him coach. 144 00:07:29,059 --> 00:07:33,194 Libby: You are gonna coach youth football? 145 00:07:33,246 --> 00:07:35,780 William: "Spend more time with the children." 146 00:07:35,832 --> 00:07:38,950 That's your constant refrain, so that's what I'm gonna do. 147 00:07:39,002 --> 00:07:41,920 Johnny will play, I will coach. And now I'm late for my dinner. 148 00:07:41,955 --> 00:07:43,705 Libby: You have a dinner? 149 00:07:43,757 --> 00:07:45,790 William: It's work, Lib, like always. 150 00:07:52,883 --> 00:07:55,884 Edna: I've told all my friends, Bill, 151 00:07:55,936 --> 00:07:59,721 that we have a famous author in our family now. 152 00:07:59,756 --> 00:08:00,889 Harry: Edna keeps expecting 153 00:08:00,941 --> 00:08:03,024 to see you hobnob on Linkletter's "House Party." 154 00:08:03,059 --> 00:08:04,893 [ Both laugh ] 155 00:08:04,895 --> 00:08:07,695 William: Well, if by "family," you mean your daughter, 156 00:08:07,731 --> 00:08:09,831 certainly there would be no book at all 157 00:08:09,866 --> 00:08:11,199 without her participation. 158 00:08:11,234 --> 00:08:13,001 Edna: It's just such a rare treat 159 00:08:13,036 --> 00:08:15,003 to spend quality time with you, Bill. 160 00:08:15,038 --> 00:08:16,488 Harry: Time does fly, doesn't it? 161 00:08:16,540 --> 00:08:18,406 I was just saying to Edna how eerie it is-- 162 00:08:18,408 --> 00:08:19,841 Edna: We need to get a move on. 163 00:08:19,876 --> 00:08:22,277 Harry: Your mother's got this crazy idea 164 00:08:22,312 --> 00:08:24,746 about taking the baby out for ice cream. 165 00:08:24,748 --> 00:08:27,081 Virginia: Mom, Lisa is 3 months old... 166 00:08:27,083 --> 00:08:29,584 Edna: A baby can't appreciate ice cream? 167 00:08:29,586 --> 00:08:32,754 [ Chuckles ] Plus, it's a nice break for you and Bill. 168 00:08:32,806 --> 00:08:37,392 You can just relax and talk about something other than work. 169 00:08:37,427 --> 00:08:40,595 [ Door opens, closes ] 170 00:08:42,148 --> 00:08:44,599 Harry, please... 171 00:08:44,651 --> 00:08:46,434 William: Is she trying to set us up? 172 00:08:46,469 --> 00:08:48,570 Virginia: And so subtly, don't you think? 173 00:08:48,605 --> 00:08:51,072 William: Well, how did she come by such a notion? 174 00:08:51,107 --> 00:08:53,074 Virginia: Not from me. 175 00:08:53,109 --> 00:08:55,493 William: As much as I would like to take you upstairs... 176 00:08:55,529 --> 00:08:57,445 Virginia: Having my mother arrange it is... 177 00:08:57,497 --> 00:09:01,583 grotesque, to say the least. 178 00:09:01,618 --> 00:09:04,536 William: How long before they go back home? 179 00:09:04,588 --> 00:09:10,174 Well, then we'll just have to... make other arrangements. 180 00:09:12,262 --> 00:09:16,297 It won't do for us to be separated this long, Virginia. 181 00:09:18,718 --> 00:09:20,602 Libby: It's true. 182 00:09:20,637 --> 00:09:26,558 I lied, and I... deceived my husband. 183 00:09:26,610 --> 00:09:30,028 That is how my firstborn came to be. 184 00:09:30,063 --> 00:09:31,779 Did I never tell you this? 185 00:09:31,815 --> 00:09:35,116 We'd been trying for years. 186 00:09:35,151 --> 00:09:40,321 Bill let me think that the problem was me, of course. 187 00:09:40,323 --> 00:09:41,906 Anyway, I, um... 188 00:09:41,958 --> 00:09:45,209 I underwent this capping procedure 189 00:09:45,245 --> 00:09:46,494 that Bill invented himself, 190 00:09:46,546 --> 00:09:50,715 because Bill is... brilliant that way. 191 00:09:50,750 --> 00:09:55,303 And suddenly, I was pregnant. 192 00:09:55,338 --> 00:09:58,723 I was so happy. 193 00:09:58,758 --> 00:10:02,644 And then I had a miscarriage. 194 00:10:02,679 --> 00:10:07,265 And Bill said, "No more." 195 00:10:09,352 --> 00:10:12,403 "No more trying." 196 00:10:12,439 --> 00:10:17,575 It was just gonna be the two of us for the rest of our days. 197 00:10:17,611 --> 00:10:18,860 [ Chuckles ] 198 00:10:18,895 --> 00:10:23,915 So I-- I got my doctor to secretly inseminate me 199 00:10:23,950 --> 00:10:28,336 using the-- the remainder of Bill's sperm, and... 200 00:10:28,371 --> 00:10:34,759 like a gift from heaven, it worked. 201 00:10:37,180 --> 00:10:39,981 Although... 202 00:10:40,016 --> 00:10:43,885 I think whatever feelings that Bill had for me, 203 00:10:43,937 --> 00:10:48,890 they died that night that he realized I deceived him, 204 00:10:48,942 --> 00:10:51,109 that he was gonna be a father after all. 205 00:10:56,900 --> 00:10:58,483 I think you could use a clip. 206 00:11:18,004 --> 00:11:20,555 [ Gasps ] You startled me. 207 00:11:20,590 --> 00:11:22,974 Paul: I'm sorry. 208 00:11:23,059 --> 00:11:28,229 I was just watching you and thinking... 209 00:11:28,264 --> 00:11:30,431 thank God for Libby Masters. 210 00:11:30,467 --> 00:11:32,100 Libby: Oh. 211 00:11:32,102 --> 00:11:37,271 Paul: You've been so kind to Joy and beyond generous to me. 212 00:11:37,323 --> 00:11:39,741 Over these past few months, 213 00:11:39,776 --> 00:11:42,326 if it hadn't been for you, I don't... 214 00:11:42,362 --> 00:11:45,446 Libby: Of course. Anything for friends. 215 00:11:50,787 --> 00:11:52,537 Harry: Your mother's rocking the baby, 216 00:11:52,589 --> 00:11:54,288 humming "Chattanooga Choo Choo"... 217 00:11:56,960 --> 00:12:00,712 Honey, Lisa lapped up every last drop of that ice cream-- 218 00:12:00,764 --> 00:12:03,131 Virginia: Did you know she was going to do that tonight, 219 00:12:03,133 --> 00:12:04,365 throw Bill at me in that way? 220 00:12:07,103 --> 00:12:08,903 You did. 221 00:12:08,938 --> 00:12:12,640 And did you also know that she has told me to marry Bill? 222 00:12:12,642 --> 00:12:14,225 Harry: She did mention something. 223 00:12:14,277 --> 00:12:16,778 Virginia: Well, I hope you told her she's out of her mind. 224 00:12:16,813 --> 00:12:21,249 Harry: And what good would that do? 225 00:12:27,407 --> 00:12:31,959 Our first date, your mother and I went to the movies. 226 00:12:31,995 --> 00:12:33,961 I showed up in shirt-sleeves, 227 00:12:33,997 --> 00:12:36,964 and she wore her grandmother's mink stole. 228 00:12:37,000 --> 00:12:40,718 She's always imagined herself being someplace better, 229 00:12:40,754 --> 00:12:44,338 someplace else other than wherever she actually is. 230 00:12:44,390 --> 00:12:47,091 I think she pictured herself going to galas 231 00:12:47,143 --> 00:12:50,228 on the arm of some politician or doctor or lawyer, 232 00:12:50,263 --> 00:12:52,346 and instead, she ended up with me. 233 00:12:52,398 --> 00:12:55,183 Virginia: Please. She would be lost without you. 234 00:12:55,185 --> 00:12:58,436 Harry: And I know that. 235 00:12:58,488 --> 00:13:03,608 We all need stories to tell ourselves, and that's hers. 236 00:13:08,731 --> 00:13:10,865 Betty: Well, we can probably skip the tour. 237 00:13:10,917 --> 00:13:13,751 Jane: I'm not sure two hours a day warrants my own office. 238 00:13:13,787 --> 00:13:15,536 Betty: Mm. You're gonna need that. 239 00:13:15,622 --> 00:13:17,622 Mail's up to a thousand letters a day. 240 00:13:17,674 --> 00:13:19,207 They want you to answer anything 241 00:13:19,275 --> 00:13:22,210 that doesn't compare them to Satan or damn them both to hell. 242 00:13:22,262 --> 00:13:23,845 Jane: Oh, my God. Is that-- 243 00:13:23,880 --> 00:13:26,214 Betty: Shh! Lower your voice. 244 00:13:26,216 --> 00:13:28,883 This is a doctor's office, not Grauman's Chinese. 245 00:13:28,918 --> 00:13:30,885 Jane: Isabella Ricci. 246 00:13:30,887 --> 00:13:32,053 [ Sighs ] 247 00:13:32,105 --> 00:13:35,223 Those lips have touched Rock Hudson's lips. 248 00:13:35,258 --> 00:13:36,724 They touched Perry Como's lips. 249 00:13:36,810 --> 00:13:38,109 Betty: And look at my lips 250 00:13:38,144 --> 00:13:40,361 when I tell you nobody knows they're here, 251 00:13:40,396 --> 00:13:44,282 which means you do not know they're here. 252 00:13:44,317 --> 00:13:45,233 Jane: Can I just walk through the lobby? 253 00:13:45,285 --> 00:13:46,400 Betty: You cannot. 254 00:13:46,436 --> 00:13:47,335 Jane: Can I just say that I have to pee? 255 00:13:47,370 --> 00:13:48,503 I've had two kids. 256 00:13:48,538 --> 00:13:50,037 By the time I get out there, it'll be true. 257 00:13:50,073 --> 00:13:53,624 Betty: Clickity-clack, Jane. Clickity-clack. 258 00:13:58,081 --> 00:14:00,298 Al: Paul tells me you're a big football fan. 259 00:14:00,333 --> 00:14:02,166 William: I still remember the game 260 00:14:02,218 --> 00:14:04,118 you ran 200 yards against the Colts. 261 00:14:04,153 --> 00:14:07,121 Al: 203 yards, but who's counting, right? 262 00:14:07,156 --> 00:14:10,224 Isabella: Our friend Sandy absolutely raves about you two. 263 00:14:10,260 --> 00:14:11,092 Sandra Dee. 264 00:14:11,094 --> 00:14:12,593 Virginia: Oh, I don't-- 265 00:14:12,645 --> 00:14:16,147 I don't believe we've ever worked with Miss Dee. 266 00:14:16,182 --> 00:14:17,648 - Isabella: She read your book. - Virginia: Ah. 267 00:14:17,684 --> 00:14:19,100 Isabella: And if you ever want tickets to any game... 268 00:14:19,102 --> 00:14:20,601 What game can we get, Al? 269 00:14:20,653 --> 00:14:22,236 Al: How does 50 yard line, 270 00:14:22,272 --> 00:14:23,688 Unitas against the Steelers sound? 271 00:14:23,740 --> 00:14:25,940 Isabella: Don Shula won't have the access you'll have. 272 00:14:25,942 --> 00:14:27,775 Any game, any time. 273 00:14:27,810 --> 00:14:30,528 Al: And I have friends at the Ice Capades, too, 274 00:14:30,580 --> 00:14:32,029 in case you're interested. 275 00:14:32,115 --> 00:14:35,333 Virginia: Oh, that's... very generous. 276 00:14:35,368 --> 00:14:39,370 But, uh, why don't we proceed with why you're here? 277 00:14:39,422 --> 00:14:40,788 Al: Right. So... 278 00:14:40,840 --> 00:14:44,926 Explain how me not touching my wife sexually 279 00:14:44,961 --> 00:14:47,044 is gonna fix things in the sex department. 280 00:14:47,096 --> 00:14:49,297 William: We've found that non-sexual touching 281 00:14:49,349 --> 00:14:51,299 removes the pressure and expectations 282 00:14:51,351 --> 00:14:52,800 sometimes associated with sex. 283 00:14:52,852 --> 00:14:54,802 We understand that may seem incongruous 284 00:14:54,854 --> 00:14:56,837 to what it is you're trying to achieve, 285 00:14:56,873 --> 00:14:58,773 but we've had a very high success rate 286 00:14:58,808 --> 00:15:01,108 with sensate therapy in cases like your wife's. 287 00:15:01,144 --> 00:15:03,561 Isabella: Just to think the word "frigidity" 288 00:15:03,613 --> 00:15:06,197 and this body could inhabit the same universe... 289 00:15:06,232 --> 00:15:08,149 Virginia: We prefer non-orgasmic. 290 00:15:08,201 --> 00:15:09,617 Frigid is pejorative, 291 00:15:09,652 --> 00:15:12,587 and it suggests that it's the woman's fault. 292 00:15:12,622 --> 00:15:14,221 Isabella: I just want it fixed 293 00:15:14,257 --> 00:15:17,458 so that we can go back to the way we were in the beginning. 294 00:15:21,497 --> 00:15:23,164 Edna: What are you doing, Tessie? 295 00:15:23,166 --> 00:15:26,334 Tessa: Oh. I-I'm just leaving something out for my mom. 296 00:15:26,336 --> 00:15:28,035 Edna: Hmm. 297 00:15:31,758 --> 00:15:36,377 "Life And love"... by Tessa Johnson? 298 00:15:36,412 --> 00:15:38,930 You wrote this? 299 00:15:38,982 --> 00:15:40,848 Tessa: "Teen Society" has a contest, 300 00:15:40,850 --> 00:15:42,183 and I entered it on a lark, 301 00:15:42,185 --> 00:15:44,518 but then they told me that I won, and I flipped. 302 00:15:44,520 --> 00:15:47,772 Edna: Oh, my. That's really something. 303 00:15:50,076 --> 00:15:51,926 And will you look at this. 304 00:15:54,197 --> 00:15:56,414 The perfect hairstyle for you. 305 00:15:56,499 --> 00:16:01,168 Let's you and I have some fun. 306 00:16:01,204 --> 00:16:02,670 I'll make an appointment. 307 00:16:02,705 --> 00:16:04,588 We'll go down together, and they will give you this hairstyle. 308 00:16:04,624 --> 00:16:05,456 Hmm? 309 00:16:05,508 --> 00:16:07,875 A girl can always do things 310 00:16:07,910 --> 00:16:10,411 to make herself more attractive to the boys. 311 00:16:12,515 --> 00:16:15,716 Tessa: I don't think this hairstyle suits me, grandma. 312 00:16:15,752 --> 00:16:17,852 Edna: Come on. Don't be like your mother, 313 00:16:17,887 --> 00:16:19,620 always fighting me at every turn. 314 00:16:19,689 --> 00:16:21,889 Tessa: Maybe she has good reason to fight. 315 00:16:21,941 --> 00:16:25,026 Edna: Yes, of course. 316 00:16:25,061 --> 00:16:27,828 She's poisoned you against me. 317 00:16:27,864 --> 00:16:31,399 Your grandfather can do no wrong in her eyes 318 00:16:31,401 --> 00:16:35,953 because he always tells her exactly what she wants to hear. 319 00:16:35,989 --> 00:16:38,656 I'm sure nobody wanted to hear "The British are coming," 320 00:16:38,708 --> 00:16:41,242 at 3:00 in the morning, but God bless that messenger. 321 00:16:41,244 --> 00:16:44,211 Tessa: I didn't mean to hurt your feelings. 322 00:16:46,883 --> 00:16:48,049 Edna: I know. 323 00:16:48,084 --> 00:16:53,421 Look, honey, your essay is very impressive, 324 00:16:53,473 --> 00:16:56,424 but think of your mother as a cautionary tale. 325 00:16:56,476 --> 00:16:58,225 She's written a whole book, 326 00:16:58,261 --> 00:17:00,695 and look at her life-- it's a mess. 327 00:17:00,730 --> 00:17:03,264 Tessa: Mm. 328 00:17:03,316 --> 00:17:05,349 There's some things that are... 329 00:17:05,401 --> 00:17:06,684 definitely screwed up. 330 00:17:06,736 --> 00:17:09,103 Edna: Just don't follow in her footsteps, all right? 331 00:17:09,155 --> 00:17:12,073 You focus on what really matters. 332 00:17:15,111 --> 00:17:16,277 [ Whistle blows ] 333 00:17:16,312 --> 00:17:17,828 Children: Team, break! 334 00:17:17,864 --> 00:17:19,780 Children: Ready, break! 335 00:17:19,832 --> 00:17:21,082 - William: Come on, Hornets! - Paul: Let's go, Hornets! 336 00:17:23,870 --> 00:17:26,120 William: Okay, after the change of possession, you're in. 337 00:17:26,155 --> 00:17:27,788 Johnny: I don't want to go in. 338 00:17:27,840 --> 00:17:30,124 I don't want to play. I told you that. 339 00:17:30,159 --> 00:17:32,960 William: Just do as your coaches tell you, all right? 340 00:17:32,962 --> 00:17:34,295 Come on, offense! 341 00:17:36,365 --> 00:17:38,632 Come on, offense. Oh! 342 00:17:38,684 --> 00:17:40,518 Jesus, he just stands there like a clay pigeon. 343 00:17:40,553 --> 00:17:42,186 Paul: Well, it's not his regular position. 344 00:17:42,221 --> 00:17:44,305 He's normally a tight end, but our starting quarterback 345 00:17:44,357 --> 00:17:47,641 showed up 10 minutes late for practice yesterday, so... 346 00:17:47,643 --> 00:17:48,692 William: Is he any good? 347 00:17:48,728 --> 00:17:50,311 Paul: He's got an arm like a slingshot. 348 00:17:50,363 --> 00:17:53,147 It's his attitude I don't care for. 349 00:17:53,182 --> 00:17:55,649 William: Hey, 14. 350 00:17:55,651 --> 00:17:57,318 Yeah, you ready to go in for number 12? 351 00:17:57,320 --> 00:17:58,652 Paul: Hey, Bill, the kid's got to learn. 352 00:17:58,704 --> 00:18:00,287 William: I agree. 353 00:18:00,323 --> 00:18:01,872 But can we figure out some other kind of punishment 354 00:18:01,908 --> 00:18:03,891 that doesn't embarrass the whole team by losing? 355 00:18:06,579 --> 00:18:07,728 Paul: Okay. Dennis, come here. 356 00:18:07,764 --> 00:18:09,363 William: Come on, Hornets! 357 00:18:12,201 --> 00:18:14,268 Paul: Now, look-- you're going in. 358 00:18:14,303 --> 00:18:16,754 But listen to me, son-- no more screw-ups. 359 00:18:16,806 --> 00:18:18,339 No more. 360 00:18:18,391 --> 00:18:20,558 [ Whistle blows ] Billy, you're out. Come on. 361 00:18:20,593 --> 00:18:22,593 - William: Go on, get in there. - Paul: Let's go, Dennis. 362 00:18:22,645 --> 00:18:24,378 William: [ Clapping ] 363 00:18:31,571 --> 00:18:34,939 Eunice: The new kid's yours? 364 00:18:34,991 --> 00:18:38,025 Libby: 33, Johnny Masters. It's our first game. 365 00:18:38,027 --> 00:18:41,328 Eunice: [ Chuckles ] There is no "our" in football. 366 00:18:41,364 --> 00:18:45,866 It's all about the boys, the coaches, and the dads. 367 00:18:45,868 --> 00:18:47,935 I'm in charge of snacks today. 368 00:18:47,970 --> 00:18:52,039 Libby: Is there some kind of... snack sign-up? 369 00:18:52,091 --> 00:18:54,708 Eunice: Yep, and if you don't get in the snack rotation, 370 00:18:54,710 --> 00:18:56,043 you're a bad mom. 371 00:18:56,078 --> 00:19:00,047 Got to show up at the games 'cause it's expected, 372 00:19:00,082 --> 00:19:02,633 not that anybody cares you're here. 373 00:19:02,685 --> 00:19:05,519 But if you stay at home and take a bath 374 00:19:05,555 --> 00:19:09,106 and have five blessed seconds to yourself, 375 00:19:09,142 --> 00:19:12,059 well, then we're back to bad mom. 376 00:19:12,111 --> 00:19:15,062 But you'll get the hang of all this. 377 00:19:15,064 --> 00:19:18,199 Essentially, your job is to be invisible... 378 00:19:18,234 --> 00:19:21,068 while cheering them on. 379 00:19:21,120 --> 00:19:23,070 Go, Hornets! 380 00:19:23,072 --> 00:19:25,906 Dennis: Set! Hike! 381 00:19:29,579 --> 00:19:31,212 William: Watch it. That's right! 382 00:19:31,247 --> 00:19:33,164 That's the way! Yes! That's it, Dennis! 383 00:19:33,216 --> 00:19:34,498 Go! Yeah! 384 00:19:34,550 --> 00:19:36,917 [ Cheers and applause ] 385 00:19:36,969 --> 00:19:39,086 Yes! That's the way! Well done, Dennis! 386 00:19:39,088 --> 00:19:40,187 Well done! 387 00:19:40,223 --> 00:19:43,224 Good team effort. Good team effort. 388 00:19:43,259 --> 00:19:46,510 Paul: 2 points. 2 point conversion, let's go. 389 00:19:46,562 --> 00:19:49,730 William: So, now we've dug ourselves out of that hole... 390 00:19:49,765 --> 00:19:51,031 33 goes in? 391 00:19:51,067 --> 00:19:52,733 Paul: 33 goes in. Hey, Johnny. 392 00:19:52,768 --> 00:19:53,934 Let's go. You're in. 393 00:19:56,405 --> 00:20:00,491 William: Yeah. Stay sharp, 33. 394 00:20:00,526 --> 00:20:02,026 - Go, Hornets. - Libby: [ Inhales sharply ] 395 00:20:04,330 --> 00:20:06,330 William: You kept your cool out there. 396 00:20:06,365 --> 00:20:07,665 Dennis: You're an asshole. 397 00:20:07,700 --> 00:20:10,868 William: You can't speak to your coaches like that. 398 00:20:10,920 --> 00:20:13,954 Dennis: Mr. Edley's my coach, not you. 399 00:20:13,990 --> 00:20:16,123 Children: Ready, break! 400 00:20:16,175 --> 00:20:19,293 Paul: Come on, defense! 401 00:20:21,464 --> 00:20:23,347 William: Look, Dennis... 402 00:20:23,382 --> 00:20:28,769 the last time I saw you, I, uh... 403 00:20:28,804 --> 00:20:30,721 I didn't behave well. 404 00:20:30,773 --> 00:20:32,806 I owe you an apology. 405 00:20:32,858 --> 00:20:35,726 I'm sorry. 406 00:20:35,778 --> 00:20:37,311 Dennis: Where's my football? 407 00:20:37,363 --> 00:20:38,646 William: Uh... I have it. 408 00:20:38,698 --> 00:20:40,564 I'll-- I'll give it back to you. 409 00:20:40,616 --> 00:20:41,982 I'll bring it next game. 410 00:20:45,571 --> 00:20:47,488 Dennis, you're a hell of a player. 411 00:20:47,540 --> 00:20:49,456 You know, I can see that already. 412 00:20:49,492 --> 00:20:51,909 So I really hope you stick with this. 413 00:20:51,961 --> 00:20:54,161 I mean it. 414 00:20:54,213 --> 00:20:56,664 You could be playing for Nebraska one day, 415 00:20:56,716 --> 00:20:57,798 like Coach Edley. 416 00:21:00,553 --> 00:21:01,835 Boy: Hike! 417 00:21:04,173 --> 00:21:05,172 [ Whistle blows ] 418 00:21:05,224 --> 00:21:06,423 William: Hey, ref, come on! 419 00:21:06,475 --> 00:21:07,775 That's clipping! Wake up! 420 00:21:07,810 --> 00:21:10,928 Come on. 421 00:21:10,980 --> 00:21:13,047 Okay, 33, that's it. Get up. 422 00:21:59,729 --> 00:22:01,612 [ Door opens, closes ] 423 00:22:17,913 --> 00:22:20,964 Vincent: Geez. Sorry. 424 00:22:21,000 --> 00:22:25,302 I-I-I was just coming in to turn off the gas, 425 00:22:25,338 --> 00:22:28,088 since I assumed no one was moving in. 426 00:22:28,140 --> 00:22:29,923 Libby: Oh, well, I, um... 427 00:22:29,975 --> 00:22:32,059 I took my time with the moving, but now I'm here. 428 00:22:32,094 --> 00:22:33,594 Vincent: You being...? 429 00:22:33,646 --> 00:22:36,680 Libby: Mrs. Edley, of course. 430 00:22:36,732 --> 00:22:38,432 Joy Edley. 431 00:22:42,605 --> 00:22:44,938 William: So, your marital problems started 432 00:22:44,974 --> 00:22:46,940 about a year ago. Is that correct? 433 00:22:46,976 --> 00:22:48,776 Al: Give or take. [ Sighs ] 434 00:22:48,828 --> 00:22:51,695 Truth is, Isabella overthinks things. 435 00:22:51,747 --> 00:22:53,781 I tell her I want steak for dinner. 436 00:22:53,833 --> 00:22:56,784 She thinks I hate her pork chops. 437 00:22:56,786 --> 00:23:00,871 It's just the way she works, always overthinking. 438 00:23:03,125 --> 00:23:05,559 You see two dogs? There's no thinking. 439 00:23:05,594 --> 00:23:10,297 There's no "How are you feeling? What am I feeling?" stuff. 440 00:23:10,299 --> 00:23:12,466 William: I understand that could seem applicable 441 00:23:12,468 --> 00:23:14,601 if we were nothing more than domesticated dogs. 442 00:23:14,637 --> 00:23:18,138 Al: But aren't we? I mean, really. 443 00:23:18,140 --> 00:23:21,975 William: I'm afraid that's not only an oversimplification 444 00:23:22,027 --> 00:23:23,477 but a dangerous one. 445 00:23:23,479 --> 00:23:25,646 Al: Can I ask you something? 446 00:23:25,648 --> 00:23:27,231 William: Of course. 447 00:23:27,283 --> 00:23:33,487 Al: If you were me, would you be concerned... 448 00:23:33,522 --> 00:23:37,157 with being asked to open up a gorilla exhibit? 449 00:23:39,245 --> 00:23:40,994 William: I don't think I'm following. 450 00:23:41,046 --> 00:23:42,362 Al: It's why we're here. 451 00:23:42,398 --> 00:23:45,065 I got asked to open a gorilla exhibit at the zoo. 452 00:23:45,101 --> 00:23:49,236 There's that famous ape, Gil the Gorilla...? 453 00:23:49,271 --> 00:23:51,238 William: I fail to see how this has anything to do 454 00:23:51,273 --> 00:23:52,539 with you and your wife. 455 00:23:52,575 --> 00:23:54,041 Al: I get paid double if she appears with me. 456 00:23:54,076 --> 00:23:58,479 So, she said she'd go to the ape house 457 00:23:58,514 --> 00:24:02,015 if I... agreed to come here. 458 00:24:02,051 --> 00:24:03,851 William: Mr. Neely... 459 00:24:03,886 --> 00:24:05,786 the only reason I care you're here 460 00:24:05,821 --> 00:24:08,856 is because of you and your wife's current sexual situation. 461 00:24:08,924 --> 00:24:12,359 Anything outside of that is not my concern. 462 00:24:12,394 --> 00:24:15,996 Al: Point taken, Doc. 463 00:24:16,031 --> 00:24:18,916 But in the spirit of not pulling punches... 464 00:24:18,951 --> 00:24:21,869 I'm not the one with the problem. 465 00:24:21,921 --> 00:24:23,203 Isabella: The problem is Al. 466 00:24:23,239 --> 00:24:26,039 He's the lowdown, ass-sniffing dog. 467 00:24:26,091 --> 00:24:29,927 Virginia: Mrs. Neely, when you asked for our help, 468 00:24:29,962 --> 00:24:32,546 the problem you presented was sexual, 469 00:24:32,548 --> 00:24:35,098 but these allegations of infidelity, 470 00:24:35,134 --> 00:24:37,651 - they make it more difficult-- - Isabella: "Allegations"? 471 00:24:37,686 --> 00:24:39,303 My husband will screw anything 472 00:24:39,388 --> 00:24:41,388 that walks, winks, or sits to pee. 473 00:24:41,440 --> 00:24:44,725 When I was filming "Johnny Reno" with Jane Russell, 474 00:24:44,777 --> 00:24:47,728 I didn't have to buy perfume for eight weeks 475 00:24:47,730 --> 00:24:51,064 'cause whatever she was wearing ended up all over our sheets. 476 00:24:51,116 --> 00:24:53,951 Then there was Natalie Wood when we were shooting "Penelope," 477 00:24:53,986 --> 00:24:55,836 Shelley Winters in "Patch Of Blue"... 478 00:24:55,871 --> 00:24:57,454 - Hell, even you. - Virginia: I'm sorry? 479 00:24:57,490 --> 00:24:59,907 Isabella: You haven't seen the way he's been looking at you? 480 00:25:01,877 --> 00:25:05,996 Virginia: We have had great success with struggling couples, 481 00:25:06,048 --> 00:25:09,466 but that's only when both partners are committed 482 00:25:09,502 --> 00:25:12,002 to each other and to the program. 483 00:25:12,054 --> 00:25:15,305 Isabella: I'm committed. We're committed. 484 00:25:15,341 --> 00:25:18,509 When we first met, there wasn't any place we wouldn't make love. 485 00:25:18,561 --> 00:25:21,562 He once had me in a fountain in Rome at 3:00 in the morning. 486 00:25:21,597 --> 00:25:23,180 Sober. 487 00:25:23,232 --> 00:25:26,817 All those coins shifting under my feet... 488 00:25:26,852 --> 00:25:30,354 It was like we were gods, and we could do whatever we pleased. 489 00:25:30,406 --> 00:25:32,673 Just the scent of him and I would climax. 490 00:25:32,708 --> 00:25:33,574 But now... 491 00:25:33,609 --> 00:25:35,826 Now we can't go out for a burger 492 00:25:35,861 --> 00:25:39,029 without some waitress leaning over his plate 493 00:25:39,081 --> 00:25:41,782 as though her tits were on the menu. 494 00:25:41,817 --> 00:25:45,369 You want to know the real reason that I can't come? 495 00:25:45,421 --> 00:25:46,753 Those other women. 496 00:25:46,789 --> 00:25:49,289 Why does he need them when he has me? 497 00:25:49,291 --> 00:25:52,509 Do you know how many men would give their right arm to have me? 498 00:25:52,545 --> 00:25:53,794 God, and I'm not talking 499 00:25:53,846 --> 00:25:56,179 about the Johnny Lunch buckets of the world, 500 00:25:56,215 --> 00:25:58,966 but princes, leading men, directors. 501 00:25:59,018 --> 00:26:01,051 And yet somehow, I'm the one 502 00:26:01,103 --> 00:26:04,771 who's made to feel like some shriveled, old crone. 503 00:26:04,807 --> 00:26:06,807 I am asking you, right now, 504 00:26:06,809 --> 00:26:10,777 who on God's green earth wouldn't want to fuck this?! 505 00:26:13,315 --> 00:26:15,899 Virginia: The problem is, she's insane. 506 00:26:15,951 --> 00:26:18,902 William: I'm not saying this case isn't a challenge... 507 00:26:18,954 --> 00:26:21,521 Virginia: Landing on the Moon is a challenge. 508 00:26:21,557 --> 00:26:23,490 William: Virginia, we can't choose cases 509 00:26:23,542 --> 00:26:24,908 based on degree of difficulty. 510 00:26:24,960 --> 00:26:26,159 Virginia: That's not true. 511 00:26:26,211 --> 00:26:27,995 We've rejected couples in the past. 512 00:26:27,997 --> 00:26:30,330 William: Based on a wide array of circumstances 513 00:26:30,382 --> 00:26:33,000 outside our expertise, but frigidity is our expertise. 514 00:26:33,002 --> 00:26:36,086 Virginia: And I feel strongly that there are core problems 515 00:26:36,138 --> 00:26:38,839 between this couple that are beyond our skill set, 516 00:26:38,891 --> 00:26:41,725 meaning our time could be better spent doing anything 517 00:26:41,760 --> 00:26:44,311 rather than going down with this sinking ship. 518 00:26:44,346 --> 00:26:46,930 William: It is not a good idea to alienate this community 519 00:26:46,982 --> 00:26:48,181 by dumping these patients. 520 00:26:48,183 --> 00:26:49,349 Virginia: What community? 521 00:26:49,401 --> 00:26:51,852 The one that gets you 50-yard-line tickets? 522 00:26:51,854 --> 00:26:54,087 William: The community that pays $3,000 523 00:26:54,156 --> 00:26:56,223 for two weeks of our expert advice. 524 00:26:56,258 --> 00:26:57,457 Virginia: They agreed to that number? 525 00:26:57,493 --> 00:26:58,825 William: Betty's already cashed the check. 526 00:26:58,861 --> 00:27:01,328 [ Knock on door ] 527 00:27:01,363 --> 00:27:03,030 Dan: I'm not interrupting anything, am I? 528 00:27:03,082 --> 00:27:05,082 - William: Yes, actually... - Virginia: Not at all. 529 00:27:05,117 --> 00:27:07,417 Dan: Anyway, I'm ready in the exam room. 530 00:27:07,453 --> 00:27:08,869 Virginia, whenever you're ready. 531 00:27:08,921 --> 00:27:11,121 William: Actually, um, I'll join you two today. 532 00:27:11,173 --> 00:27:14,541 You can... bring me up to speed. 533 00:27:22,351 --> 00:27:27,688 You know, there is one problem I've managed to solve. 534 00:27:27,723 --> 00:27:31,458 Chancery Park Plaza Hotel. 9:00. 535 00:27:31,493 --> 00:27:36,897 Dr. and Mrs. Holden have returned after a long absence. 536 00:27:42,705 --> 00:27:43,570 Virginia: All right. 537 00:27:43,622 --> 00:27:45,155 I'm going to take another reading. 538 00:27:45,207 --> 00:27:47,324 Lester: You gonna make me keep pedaling until I pass out? 539 00:27:47,376 --> 00:27:49,493 Virginia: We need as much sweat as we can gather, Lester. 540 00:27:49,545 --> 00:27:51,745 Dan: It's suspected human pheromones are secreted 541 00:27:51,747 --> 00:27:54,464 via perspiration by way of the sweat glands, in the armpits-- 542 00:27:54,500 --> 00:27:55,716 William: I know that's a theory. 543 00:27:55,751 --> 00:27:56,917 I wasn't aware 544 00:27:56,969 --> 00:27:58,585 there was empirical evidence to support it. 545 00:27:58,637 --> 00:27:59,720 Dan: We're working on it. 546 00:27:59,755 --> 00:28:01,254 William: Are we? 547 00:28:01,256 --> 00:28:04,758 But the work we've done so far is more or less theoretical? 548 00:28:04,810 --> 00:28:07,160 Dan: More or less. 549 00:28:07,196 --> 00:28:08,729 Look, I've made a fortune 550 00:28:08,764 --> 00:28:11,848 covering unpleasant smells with lemon and perfume, 551 00:28:11,900 --> 00:28:14,868 but I have no idea how to market the smell of... 552 00:28:14,903 --> 00:28:16,820 - Lester: Stink. - Virginia: Well, actually, 553 00:28:16,855 --> 00:28:18,822 what we're smelling is Lester's bacteria. 554 00:28:18,907 --> 00:28:20,107 That's what's giving off 555 00:28:20,109 --> 00:28:22,209 this unpleasant high school locker-room tang. 556 00:28:22,244 --> 00:28:23,610 Lester: You're welcome. 557 00:28:23,662 --> 00:28:26,496 Virginia: And what we'll be experimenting with, hopefully, 558 00:28:26,532 --> 00:28:27,831 is the subliminal scent. 559 00:28:27,866 --> 00:28:29,199 Dan: The smell behind the stink. 560 00:28:29,251 --> 00:28:32,002 Both: The holy grail of attraction. 561 00:28:32,037 --> 00:28:34,538 William: Or... 562 00:28:34,590 --> 00:28:36,540 we can call it a "love potion." 563 00:28:36,592 --> 00:28:40,160 Dan: Exactly. Better loving through chemistry. 564 00:28:40,195 --> 00:28:42,095 William: Although I'd hardly call it chemistry. 565 00:28:42,131 --> 00:28:43,597 Dan: What would you call it, then? 566 00:28:43,632 --> 00:28:48,602 William: A trick, essentially. I mean, isn't it a trick? 567 00:28:48,637 --> 00:28:50,470 You're trying to manipulate a person 568 00:28:50,472 --> 00:28:51,972 into feeling a sexual attraction 569 00:28:52,024 --> 00:28:54,357 for someone whom they might not, in actual fact, 570 00:28:54,393 --> 00:28:55,525 be attracted to at all. 571 00:28:55,561 --> 00:28:56,643 Dan: Or you could say 572 00:28:56,645 --> 00:28:58,645 I'm developing a product customers want. 573 00:28:58,697 --> 00:28:59,780 William: I doubt many customers 574 00:28:59,815 --> 00:29:01,198 want to be duped into falling in love. 575 00:29:01,283 --> 00:29:03,984 Virginia: I think what we all want is to uncover 576 00:29:03,986 --> 00:29:07,254 the essential link between scent and human sexual response. 577 00:29:07,289 --> 00:29:09,372 William: Well, that might be what we're interested in, 578 00:29:09,408 --> 00:29:11,742 Virginia, because our work is the work of scientific inquiry, 579 00:29:11,794 --> 00:29:14,428 but I think Mr. Logan has other interests. 580 00:29:14,463 --> 00:29:15,746 Dan: Yes. Yes, I do. 581 00:29:15,798 --> 00:29:18,381 I want to take nature's guidelines for pointing us 582 00:29:18,417 --> 00:29:21,268 to the right mate and simply give it a little boost. 583 00:29:21,303 --> 00:29:22,919 William: Nature doesn't need a little boost. 584 00:29:22,971 --> 00:29:24,471 Dan: Nature can always be improved upon. 585 00:29:24,506 --> 00:29:26,590 William: Well, she's done just fine for millennia 586 00:29:26,642 --> 00:29:28,308 without the interference of salesmen. 587 00:29:28,343 --> 00:29:29,676 Dan: She came up with polio, 588 00:29:29,678 --> 00:29:31,895 and science didn't have a problem interfering with that. 589 00:29:31,930 --> 00:29:35,482 Virginia: I think that by taking our science 590 00:29:35,517 --> 00:29:38,985 and combining it with Mr. Logan's commerce, 591 00:29:39,021 --> 00:29:42,622 what we're really doing here is creating a happy marriage. 592 00:29:42,658 --> 00:29:43,990 Lester: I think I'm having a stroke. 593 00:29:45,911 --> 00:29:50,280 William: So what you might do in a short-yardage situation, 594 00:29:50,332 --> 00:29:52,532 the quarterback takes the snap 595 00:29:52,584 --> 00:29:57,704 and then dives ahead while the line charges forward. 596 00:29:57,756 --> 00:29:59,506 Okay? 597 00:29:59,541 --> 00:30:02,793 Now, there's not usually much yardage gained like that, 598 00:30:02,845 --> 00:30:05,929 but Dennis did manage to get 7 yards out of it yesterday... 599 00:30:05,964 --> 00:30:07,314 Where have you been, Lib? 600 00:30:07,349 --> 00:30:09,115 I'm due back at work in an hour. 601 00:30:09,151 --> 00:30:12,285 Libby: Oh, I had to drop Jenny off at her friend Karen's. 602 00:30:12,321 --> 00:30:14,638 Her mother was running late. 603 00:30:14,690 --> 00:30:15,555 Hi, you. 604 00:30:15,607 --> 00:30:17,057 What are you two up to? 605 00:30:17,109 --> 00:30:19,392 William: I was just showing Johnny 606 00:30:19,394 --> 00:30:22,979 how a quarterback sneak works. 607 00:30:23,031 --> 00:30:25,198 Libby: Are you playing quarterback now? 608 00:30:25,234 --> 00:30:27,951 Johnny: Um, something Dennis did in the game yesterday. 609 00:30:27,986 --> 00:30:30,237 Libby: Dennis...? 610 00:30:30,289 --> 00:30:31,838 Johnny: Dennis Daughtry. 611 00:30:31,874 --> 00:30:34,741 Libby: The boy playing quarterback yesterday 612 00:30:34,743 --> 00:30:36,076 was Dennis Daughtry? 613 00:30:36,128 --> 00:30:39,212 William: I had no idea he was on the team. 614 00:30:39,248 --> 00:30:40,947 Johnny: Sure talked to him long enough. 615 00:30:40,983 --> 00:30:44,718 William: Well, you're on the same side now. 616 00:30:44,753 --> 00:30:47,137 And I want it to go well. 617 00:30:47,172 --> 00:30:49,089 Johnny: I'm gonna go read. 618 00:30:52,728 --> 00:30:54,561 William: It'll be all right. 619 00:30:54,596 --> 00:30:56,930 I'll be there to make sure it is. 620 00:31:02,938 --> 00:31:04,738 [ "Take Five" plays ] 621 00:31:04,773 --> 00:31:06,323 [ Sighs ] 622 00:31:27,629 --> 00:31:28,795 Good evening. 623 00:31:28,847 --> 00:31:31,681 Thomas: Good evening, Dr. Masters. 624 00:31:31,717 --> 00:31:33,016 I would just like to say 625 00:31:33,051 --> 00:31:35,802 that we are very honored to have you at our hotel. 626 00:31:35,804 --> 00:31:39,139 The wife brought home your book and just having it in the house 627 00:31:39,141 --> 00:31:42,225 has put some real pizzazz into things. 628 00:31:42,277 --> 00:31:45,278 And Mrs. Johnson is with you. 629 00:31:45,314 --> 00:31:46,696 Oh, lovely. 630 00:31:46,732 --> 00:31:49,816 So, how can I be of assistance? 631 00:31:49,818 --> 00:31:52,452 William: Mrs. Johnson and I are... 632 00:31:52,487 --> 00:31:56,823 uh, on our way to a symposium. 633 00:31:56,875 --> 00:32:00,160 We need to pay for our drinks. We can't locate a waiter. 634 00:32:00,212 --> 00:32:01,628 Thomas: Consider it taken care of. 635 00:32:01,663 --> 00:32:04,331 William: Thank you. That's very generous. 636 00:32:08,220 --> 00:32:10,503 [ Indistinct conversations ] 637 00:32:15,978 --> 00:32:19,262 We can't stay here. 638 00:32:19,314 --> 00:32:20,814 Virginia: He recognized us? 639 00:32:25,821 --> 00:32:29,990 Well... Where do we go now? 640 00:32:35,430 --> 00:32:38,398 William: Well, I have to hand it to you, Virginia. 641 00:32:38,433 --> 00:32:42,435 You've turned this into a very pleasant and inviting-- 642 00:32:42,471 --> 00:32:45,672 Virginia: Lab. 643 00:32:45,707 --> 00:32:47,140 It is a lab, Bill. 644 00:32:47,175 --> 00:32:50,377 Far cry from silk sheets and room service. 645 00:32:50,412 --> 00:32:52,178 William: All right, but... 646 00:32:52,214 --> 00:32:56,182 hotels are out since the book has now made us recognizable. 647 00:32:56,218 --> 00:32:58,518 We can't use your house because your parents appear 648 00:32:58,553 --> 00:33:00,270 to have taken up permanent residence. 649 00:33:00,355 --> 00:33:03,273 I guess there's always the car. 650 00:33:03,308 --> 00:33:05,725 You know, the point of this evening 651 00:33:05,777 --> 00:33:08,895 was not to make you sigh-- in despair, anyway. 652 00:33:08,897 --> 00:33:12,782 Virginia: It's like we've been forced back to ground zero. 653 00:33:12,818 --> 00:33:15,735 Another version of the Wash U lab where we first had sex. 654 00:33:15,787 --> 00:33:18,705 William: "Ground zero" makes it sound unnecessarily grim. 655 00:33:18,740 --> 00:33:21,324 Virginia: Starting a relationship in a lab 656 00:33:21,376 --> 00:33:23,076 is hardly a proper courtship. 657 00:33:23,128 --> 00:33:27,330 William: We had a courtship. We did. 658 00:33:27,382 --> 00:33:32,619 Unorthodox, by most standards, but we definitely had one. 659 00:33:32,654 --> 00:33:34,187 Virginia: We had a negotiation. 660 00:33:34,222 --> 00:33:39,426 And then we hooked ourselves up to wires 661 00:33:39,428 --> 00:33:44,597 while we talked each other through the stages of arousal. 662 00:33:44,649 --> 00:33:48,268 Nature was not why we got together, Bill. 663 00:33:48,353 --> 00:33:50,320 Work was. 664 00:33:50,355 --> 00:33:56,910 William: Well, I can assure you that nature played a part. 665 00:33:57,979 --> 00:34:00,830 Virginia: Yes, but do you ever... 666 00:34:00,866 --> 00:34:03,616 Do you ever wonder what it might've been like 667 00:34:03,618 --> 00:34:05,201 if we had met differently? 668 00:34:05,253 --> 00:34:09,622 At a dinner party, 669 00:34:09,624 --> 00:34:12,292 sitting on opposite ends of the table... 670 00:34:12,344 --> 00:34:15,962 And how, if the whole evening, people were talking to us, 671 00:34:16,014 --> 00:34:18,264 but we were only half listening 672 00:34:18,300 --> 00:34:21,101 because we were drawn to each other. 673 00:34:21,136 --> 00:34:23,970 William: That's not a courtship. 674 00:34:23,972 --> 00:34:27,690 That's a schoolgirl fantasy. 675 00:34:27,726 --> 00:34:30,360 Besides, I think it's unfair 676 00:34:30,395 --> 00:34:33,897 that romantic circumstances alone 677 00:34:33,949 --> 00:34:36,616 define what is considered a natural courtship. 678 00:34:36,651 --> 00:34:38,260 Virginia: Let's be honest, Bill. 679 00:34:38,261 --> 00:34:42,662 What we had was about as natural as two amoeba in a Petri dish. 680 00:34:47,577 --> 00:34:50,178 [ Television playing ] 681 00:34:52,558 --> 00:34:54,128 Tessie... 682 00:34:56,008 --> 00:34:57,729 Your hair looks like... 683 00:34:57,855 --> 00:35:00,556 Tessa: It exploded? I know. 684 00:35:00,558 --> 00:35:02,724 Grandma. 685 00:35:02,726 --> 00:35:04,610 The hair spray's making me nauseous. 686 00:35:04,645 --> 00:35:07,112 Virginia: Well, then you should wash it out, honey. 687 00:35:07,147 --> 00:35:08,230 Tessa: I don't know. 688 00:35:08,232 --> 00:35:09,898 This whole thing seems so important to her. 689 00:35:09,934 --> 00:35:11,817 Edna: My goodness, Mary Virginia, 690 00:35:11,869 --> 00:35:13,785 the hours you keep 691 00:35:13,821 --> 00:35:15,787 I thought Tessa was exaggerating, 692 00:35:15,823 --> 00:35:17,005 but apparently not. 693 00:35:20,828 --> 00:35:23,245 I'm just wondering if Bill kept you out so late. 694 00:35:23,297 --> 00:35:24,880 Because if that's so, then may-- 695 00:35:24,915 --> 00:35:27,833 Virginia: How dare you give Tessa that preposterous hairdo. 696 00:35:27,885 --> 00:35:29,351 What did you tell her? 697 00:35:29,386 --> 00:35:31,587 That she looks pretty-- prettier? 698 00:35:31,622 --> 00:35:33,055 Edna: I think she does look pretty. 699 00:35:33,090 --> 00:35:34,856 Virginia: She looks like a stovetop scrubber. 700 00:35:34,892 --> 00:35:36,258 Edna: She looks like Miss America. 701 00:35:36,310 --> 00:35:37,726 And what's wrong with that? 702 00:35:37,761 --> 00:35:40,613 You certainly were one for the pageants back in the day. 703 00:35:40,614 --> 00:35:43,361 Don't talk to me about those pageants. I hated those pageants. 704 00:35:43,368 --> 00:35:45,835 Edna: Well, if that's how you choose to remember it, fine. 705 00:35:45,837 --> 00:35:47,170 All I'm doing is trying to have 706 00:35:47,172 --> 00:35:48,888 a relationship with my granddaughter, 707 00:35:48,924 --> 00:35:50,590 which is what that girl really needs. 708 00:35:51,342 --> 00:35:53,008 That's why I'm here, honey. 709 00:35:53,044 --> 00:35:55,878 I'm here to take care of you and Tessa and-- 710 00:35:55,913 --> 00:35:58,380 Virginia: But you don't take care of me! 711 00:35:58,382 --> 00:36:00,633 You belittle me! And you criticize me! 712 00:36:00,685 --> 00:36:01,884 Edna: You know what? 713 00:36:01,919 --> 00:36:04,470 Whether you like it or not, I am your mother. 714 00:36:04,522 --> 00:36:07,022 And Tessa is our chance to finally get this right. 715 00:36:07,058 --> 00:36:09,191 Virginia: Don't you bring Tessa into this. 716 00:36:09,260 --> 00:36:10,559 Edna: You don't mean that. 717 00:36:10,611 --> 00:36:12,895 Virginia: I have never meant anything more. 718 00:36:17,235 --> 00:36:18,734 Edna: Mm. 719 00:36:25,110 --> 00:36:27,060 Virginia: Don't you know 720 00:36:27,112 --> 00:36:30,897 that all I've ever wanted was... your approval? 721 00:36:34,402 --> 00:36:40,456 For you to just be proud of me with no strings attached? 722 00:36:40,492 --> 00:36:44,377 But you can't do it, can you?! 723 00:36:47,165 --> 00:36:50,500 That's fine. 724 00:36:50,552 --> 00:36:52,802 Because it's too late for us, 725 00:36:52,837 --> 00:36:56,973 but I will not let you take my daughter and twist her 726 00:36:57,008 --> 00:37:00,760 into some version of herself that she will come to loathe. 727 00:37:00,812 --> 00:37:05,898 Edna: Oh. I make you feel horrible? 728 00:37:05,934 --> 00:37:09,519 Isn't that a little bit like blaming the messenger, hmm? 729 00:37:09,554 --> 00:37:12,121 I can love you, Mary Virginia, 730 00:37:12,157 --> 00:37:15,525 and I can still tell you the truth. 731 00:37:15,577 --> 00:37:17,860 Why is it you can't hear it? 732 00:37:22,250 --> 00:37:23,950 Libby: It's a small leak, but it's steady. 733 00:37:24,002 --> 00:37:25,201 Vincent: Uh-huh. 734 00:37:25,236 --> 00:37:27,036 Libby: Do you want some coffee? I just made some. 735 00:37:27,088 --> 00:37:28,788 Vincent: I'm good, thanks. 736 00:37:28,840 --> 00:37:30,039 Libby: It's funny. 737 00:37:30,091 --> 00:37:32,959 For years, I've been making coffee for two, 738 00:37:33,011 --> 00:37:35,962 and I haven't quite mastered the half pot. 739 00:37:36,014 --> 00:37:37,347 Seems obvious, you know? 740 00:37:37,382 --> 00:37:39,098 Half the water, half the coffee, 741 00:37:39,134 --> 00:37:42,518 and yet it's either too weak or too bitter. 742 00:37:42,554 --> 00:37:47,533 Yet somehow the highlight of my day is this kitchen table, 743 00:37:47,534 --> 00:37:50,412 this chair and that first sip. 744 00:37:51,069 --> 00:37:52,869 Washer's bent. 745 00:37:52,870 --> 00:37:56,622 Yeah, I'm gonna have to grab another one from dowtairs. 746 00:37:56,674 --> 00:37:59,374 So, you and the hubby are split, then? 747 00:37:59,376 --> 00:38:03,712 Libby: Uh... yeah, I'm, uh... I'm afraid so. 748 00:38:03,714 --> 00:38:05,514 Vincent: Yeah? You have any kids? 749 00:38:05,549 --> 00:38:08,550 Libby: Um, yeah. 750 00:38:08,552 --> 00:38:11,320 I do. I have three beautiful children. 751 00:38:11,355 --> 00:38:13,605 Vincent: Yeah, that's what I most regret about my divorce-- 752 00:38:13,641 --> 00:38:15,724 what happened with my kids. 753 00:38:15,759 --> 00:38:20,649 Libby: Nothing bad is gonna happen to my kids. 754 00:38:20,865 --> 00:38:23,431 I have made sure of it. 755 00:38:23,432 --> 00:38:25,357 Well, you are a miracle worker then. 756 00:38:25,954 --> 00:38:29,288 Oh, yeah. I checked up on your lease, 757 00:38:29,324 --> 00:38:32,041 and you're paid up for six months, so... 758 00:38:32,076 --> 00:38:35,912 enjoy your stay here... Mrs. Edley. 759 00:38:38,917 --> 00:38:42,067 [ Door opens, closes ] 760 00:38:50,867 --> 00:38:54,360 Virginia: You need to re-do these forms, Mr. Neely. 761 00:38:54,361 --> 00:38:58,647 Your one-word, perfunctory answers are not going to cut it. 762 00:38:59,772 --> 00:39:02,773 Al: I was never very good with tests. 763 00:39:02,775 --> 00:39:05,976 Always got distracted by girls like you. 764 00:39:06,012 --> 00:39:07,778 Virginia: Right. 765 00:39:07,830 --> 00:39:10,114 Start with number 12, please. 766 00:39:12,360 --> 00:39:13,390 Mmh. 767 00:39:13,391 --> 00:39:16,060 What form of contraception have you used? 768 00:39:16,061 --> 00:39:17,417 You wrote "Television". 769 00:39:17,423 --> 00:39:19,323 Always 100% effective. 770 00:39:19,675 --> 00:39:24,162 Virginia: I will be back to collect your answers shortly. 771 00:39:30,070 --> 00:39:31,970 It's warm. 772 00:39:31,971 --> 00:39:35,222 William: Well, we find it makes penetration easier. 773 00:39:35,223 --> 00:39:38,153 And you watch? From behind the glass? 774 00:39:38,188 --> 00:39:39,310 William: I do. 775 00:39:39,312 --> 00:39:42,112 We just want to rule out any physical problems 776 00:39:42,148 --> 00:39:45,065 that may be preventing you from achieving orgasm. 777 00:39:47,703 --> 00:39:51,388 Isabella: Then I guess I'll just wait for you to yell, "Action." 778 00:39:51,424 --> 00:39:53,900 William: Good. Let's get started. 779 00:39:57,901 --> 00:39:59,261 Anything? 780 00:39:59,262 --> 00:40:01,668 Thoughts? Feelings? 781 00:40:02,218 --> 00:40:05,169 Beth: I need to pick up some tide on my way home? 782 00:40:05,221 --> 00:40:08,139 Virginia: You're sure? No arousal or...? 783 00:40:08,174 --> 00:40:10,341 Beth: Sorry. 784 00:40:10,343 --> 00:40:12,844 [ Sniffs ] Smells like my old boyfriend's hamper. 785 00:40:12,896 --> 00:40:15,680 Virginia: All right. Thank you, Beth. 786 00:40:15,682 --> 00:40:18,015 Dan: Lester's sweat strikes out again. 787 00:40:18,017 --> 00:40:19,517 I'm starting to lose hope. 788 00:40:19,569 --> 00:40:22,687 Virginia: Well, I wouldn't yet. 789 00:40:25,024 --> 00:40:26,491 See these spikes? 790 00:40:26,526 --> 00:40:28,075 Dan: Mm-hmm. 791 00:40:28,111 --> 00:40:29,475 Virginia: Her mouth's saying, "No," 792 00:40:29,574 --> 00:40:32,831 but her vagina says, "Yes." 793 00:40:39,832 --> 00:40:41,874 How did I do? 794 00:40:41,882 --> 00:40:47,024 William: You achieved orgasm at 54 seconds. 795 00:40:47,025 --> 00:40:49,056 54 seconds? 796 00:40:49,057 --> 00:40:53,169 So I'm not frigid after all? 797 00:41:04,327 --> 00:41:07,953 Skin flush, blotches apparent on the neck and back, 798 00:41:07,954 --> 00:41:09,454 nipples erect and 799 00:41:09,569 --> 00:41:11,569 the beginnings of vaginal lubrication. 800 00:41:11,621 --> 00:41:13,571 Dan: Yet they all insist that they're not aroused, 801 00:41:13,623 --> 00:41:15,239 that they find Lester's smell repugnant. 802 00:41:15,291 --> 00:41:17,074 Virginia: There's something in that stinky sweat 803 00:41:17,126 --> 00:41:18,459 that keeps drawing these women in. 804 00:41:18,494 --> 00:41:19,627 Dan: Mm. 805 00:41:19,662 --> 00:41:22,663 William: Obviously, being alone in here, 806 00:41:22,715 --> 00:41:24,081 minus distractions, 807 00:41:24,167 --> 00:41:27,718 allowed you to relax, let nature take its course. 808 00:41:27,754 --> 00:41:31,922 Isabella: You are leaving out one very attentive... 809 00:41:31,975 --> 00:41:34,692 and handsome variable. 810 00:41:34,727 --> 00:41:38,229 William: Uh... 811 00:41:38,264 --> 00:41:44,935 that, uh... "Variable" is what's commonly known as transference. 812 00:41:44,988 --> 00:41:47,655 It's a perfectly normal phenomenon that can occur 813 00:41:47,690 --> 00:41:50,324 during the course of a therapeutic relationship. 814 00:41:50,360 --> 00:41:53,694 Rest assured, what you felt can easily be explained by science. 815 00:41:53,746 --> 00:41:56,831 Isabella: Dr. Masters... 816 00:41:56,866 --> 00:42:01,369 what you call science, most would call chemistry. 817 00:42:04,040 --> 00:42:06,374 Paul: You feel that? Not bad, though, right? 818 00:42:06,426 --> 00:42:07,591 You can move it. 819 00:42:07,627 --> 00:42:09,510 Libby: Johnny, what happened? 820 00:42:09,545 --> 00:42:11,178 Paul: Well, the game ended, and you weren't there, 821 00:42:11,214 --> 00:42:12,296 so I took Johnny home myself. 822 00:42:12,298 --> 00:42:13,631 Libby: But what happened to his leg? 823 00:42:13,633 --> 00:42:15,132 Paul: He just ended up on the wrong end of a pile-up. 824 00:42:15,184 --> 00:42:16,517 He strained his ankle is all. He's fine. 825 00:42:16,552 --> 00:42:18,102 Johnny: Got two tackles today, mom. 826 00:42:18,137 --> 00:42:19,270 You missed it. 827 00:42:19,305 --> 00:42:20,855 Libby: Two tackles, and now you're hurt. 828 00:42:20,890 --> 00:42:22,807 - Where is your father? - Johnny: He missed it, too. 829 00:42:22,809 --> 00:42:23,941 Paul: Apparently, Bill had to work, 830 00:42:23,976 --> 00:42:25,393 so I was coaching alone today. 831 00:42:25,445 --> 00:42:26,811 Libby: So no one was paying attention when Johnny got hurt? 832 00:42:26,863 --> 00:42:28,079 Paul: It's a contact sport, Libby. 833 00:42:28,114 --> 00:42:29,230 It's how it works. 834 00:42:29,282 --> 00:42:31,399 Here, stand up, Johnny. He's all right. 835 00:42:31,451 --> 00:42:32,583 Johnny: I'm fine. 836 00:42:32,618 --> 00:42:34,819 Paul: There, see? He's fine. 837 00:42:34,871 --> 00:42:35,953 It's just a bruise-- 838 00:42:35,988 --> 00:42:37,405 Libby: He's not fine! He is limping! 839 00:42:37,457 --> 00:42:38,622 Paul: And soon, he won't be. 840 00:42:38,658 --> 00:42:40,041 Libby: I'm gonna have a doctor look at him. 841 00:42:40,076 --> 00:42:41,325 Paul: Libby, he doesn't need a doctor. 842 00:42:41,377 --> 00:42:42,460 He just needs to walk it off, 843 00:42:42,495 --> 00:42:43,544 and tomorrow morning, he'll be fine. 844 00:42:43,579 --> 00:42:45,496 Johnny: Mom, I'm okay. 845 00:42:45,548 --> 00:42:48,065 Libby: That's it. There is no more football. 846 00:42:48,101 --> 00:42:49,500 Johnny: But I have a game tomorrow. 847 00:42:49,535 --> 00:42:50,501 Libby: And you won't be in it. 848 00:42:50,503 --> 00:42:51,569 You are retiring, starting now. 849 00:42:53,072 --> 00:42:54,472 Why are you looking at Coach Edley? 850 00:42:54,507 --> 00:42:55,639 Johnny: Because I want to play. 851 00:42:55,675 --> 00:42:56,924 Libby: And I am your mother, 852 00:42:56,976 --> 00:42:58,259 and I am telling you, you are done with playing. 853 00:42:58,311 --> 00:43:01,762 Paul: Uh, Johnny, why don't you go get cleaned up, 854 00:43:01,814 --> 00:43:03,848 give your mom and me a moment? 855 00:43:10,356 --> 00:43:11,655 Can I be honest, Libby? 856 00:43:11,691 --> 00:43:13,657 You can't smother a boy like that. 857 00:43:13,693 --> 00:43:16,026 And I'm sure Bill would agree. 858 00:43:16,079 --> 00:43:18,529 Libby: Oh, so now you and Bill both think 859 00:43:18,531 --> 00:43:20,197 that I am "smothering" my son. 860 00:43:20,249 --> 00:43:21,582 Paul: Well, he did mention 861 00:43:21,617 --> 00:43:23,033 that you weren't keen on Johnny joining the team. 862 00:43:23,035 --> 00:43:24,118 But it's good for him. 863 00:43:24,170 --> 00:43:25,953 And I'll tell you what's not good for him 864 00:43:26,038 --> 00:43:27,788 is you yanking him away from the game, 865 00:43:27,840 --> 00:43:30,174 depriving him of the chance to work through the pain, 866 00:43:30,209 --> 00:43:32,710 to learn how to be a man instead of you mollycoddling him. 867 00:43:32,712 --> 00:43:35,930 Libby: Oh. You don't believe in mollycoddling. 868 00:43:35,965 --> 00:43:37,298 Paul: No, I absolutely do not, 869 00:43:37,350 --> 00:43:39,216 and I strongly urge you to change your position here. 870 00:43:39,252 --> 00:43:40,634 Libby: So you think everyone 871 00:43:40,686 --> 00:43:42,386 should just take their medicine straight, is that it? 872 00:43:42,388 --> 00:43:45,439 Or is my "mollycoddling" you the exception? 873 00:43:45,475 --> 00:43:47,892 Me? What do I have to do with any of this? 874 00:43:47,944 --> 00:43:50,778 Libby: I'm talking about your wife, how she was drowning, 875 00:43:50,813 --> 00:43:53,097 how suffocated she felt by your life together-- 876 00:43:53,132 --> 00:43:55,032 how unhappy she was. 877 00:43:55,067 --> 00:43:57,485 Paul: Libby, if this is some sort of-- 878 00:43:57,537 --> 00:44:00,571 Libby: Joy had an apartment. She was one foot out the door. 879 00:44:00,573 --> 00:44:04,208 As far as she was concerned, your marriage was over. 880 00:44:04,243 --> 00:44:07,244 There. 881 00:44:07,296 --> 00:44:10,581 No more mollycoddling for anyone. 882 00:44:26,065 --> 00:44:27,164 Paul... 883 00:44:30,019 --> 00:44:31,769 [ Door closes ] 884 00:44:33,990 --> 00:44:37,358 William: Mrs. Johnson and I have been talking, 885 00:44:37,410 --> 00:44:40,911 and we have pinpointed some possible impediments 886 00:44:40,947 --> 00:44:42,329 to your treatment here. 887 00:44:42,365 --> 00:44:44,448 Virginia: Infidelity, for starters. 888 00:44:44,450 --> 00:44:48,285 A certain lack of commitment to our process. 889 00:44:48,337 --> 00:44:51,922 William: A propensity on both your parts to focus on others 890 00:44:51,958 --> 00:44:54,191 as potential romantic attachments. 891 00:44:54,227 --> 00:44:57,127 Al: We're public figures. We're paid to be charming. 892 00:44:57,180 --> 00:44:58,679 Isabella: That doesn't mean 893 00:44:58,714 --> 00:45:00,681 we're not committed to fixing our marriage. 894 00:45:00,716 --> 00:45:03,133 Virginia: All right. 895 00:45:03,186 --> 00:45:08,806 Let's talk about one particular question on our intake forms. 896 00:45:08,858 --> 00:45:13,611 "What attracted you most to your spouse when you first met?" 897 00:45:13,646 --> 00:45:15,646 William: What did you write for that, Mrs. Neely? 898 00:45:15,648 --> 00:45:23,070 Isabella: That I was attracted by Al's smile and body and... 899 00:45:23,155 --> 00:45:25,829 the way he came up to me at the Brown derby-- 900 00:45:25,943 --> 00:45:30,928 didn't even know me-- and said, "I want you." 901 00:45:30,963 --> 00:45:34,098 Virginia: And how did you answer that question, Mr. Neely? 902 00:45:35,868 --> 00:45:38,302 Al: I don't know. Probably some smart-ass answer. 903 00:45:38,337 --> 00:45:40,271 Virginia: That's what I thought, too. 904 00:45:40,306 --> 00:45:44,174 At first. But then I reread it. 905 00:45:44,176 --> 00:45:46,176 "What attracted you most?" 906 00:45:46,178 --> 00:45:49,179 And you wrote, "She was 20 feet tall." 907 00:45:49,232 --> 00:45:54,184 Al: I told you. It's a smart-ass answer. 908 00:45:54,186 --> 00:45:56,253 Isabella: But what did that even mean? 909 00:45:56,289 --> 00:45:58,556 Al: Nothing. 910 00:45:58,591 --> 00:46:00,991 Just... 911 00:46:01,027 --> 00:46:03,994 the first time I met Isabella... 912 00:46:04,030 --> 00:46:10,334 I was sitting in a dark theater with a bunch of other men... 913 00:46:10,369 --> 00:46:15,539 watching... lusting... 914 00:46:15,541 --> 00:46:20,761 knowing that was as close as they'd ever get to her. 915 00:46:20,796 --> 00:46:25,316 But for me, Isabella was within reach. 916 00:46:25,351 --> 00:46:30,054 I knew that woman up there on that screen, 917 00:46:30,106 --> 00:46:33,023 on all those magazine covers... 918 00:46:33,059 --> 00:46:35,893 the one that did Perry Como... 919 00:46:35,895 --> 00:46:38,362 I knew she didn't have to vanish when the lights went up. 920 00:46:38,397 --> 00:46:41,231 I could have her. 921 00:46:41,284 --> 00:46:45,819 Isabella: Al, I was more than some... conquest. 922 00:46:45,871 --> 00:46:48,072 I felt it. I was there, too. 923 00:46:48,124 --> 00:46:51,041 Al: And that first night at the derby, 924 00:46:51,077 --> 00:46:55,179 all I wanted was to have you right then and there. 925 00:46:55,214 --> 00:46:57,631 Isabella: Yes, that's how I felt, too. 926 00:46:57,667 --> 00:46:59,850 Virginia: And then what happened? 927 00:47:03,172 --> 00:47:09,510 Al: After we'd... been together awhile... 928 00:47:09,562 --> 00:47:16,900 I started thinking about... that woman up on the screen... 929 00:47:16,936 --> 00:47:23,490 wishing that I had her... 930 00:47:23,526 --> 00:47:26,577 and not the real version sitting beside me. 931 00:47:26,612 --> 00:47:28,996 Isabella: Al... 932 00:47:29,031 --> 00:47:31,749 why are you being so cruel? 933 00:47:31,784 --> 00:47:36,754 Al: What's cruel... 934 00:47:36,789 --> 00:47:39,490 is that I never told you that. 935 00:47:48,634 --> 00:47:50,200 William: Well, you were right. 936 00:47:50,236 --> 00:47:52,503 They were doomed the moment they came in. 937 00:48:06,318 --> 00:48:08,952 [ Elevator stops ] 938 00:48:11,791 --> 00:48:13,824 Virginia: You've got to be kidding me. 939 00:48:13,876 --> 00:48:15,492 William: Why not in an elevator? 940 00:48:15,528 --> 00:48:16,877 Or in a car? 941 00:48:16,912 --> 00:48:18,996 Or in the middle of a damn field, if we feel like it... 942 00:48:19,048 --> 00:48:21,832 Virginia: Do you feel like it? After that? 943 00:48:24,170 --> 00:48:26,053 William: None of this would be an issue 944 00:48:26,088 --> 00:48:28,005 if you'd just ask your parents to leave. 945 00:48:28,057 --> 00:48:30,841 Virginia: I did. They'll be gone by tomorrow. 946 00:48:32,928 --> 00:48:35,763 William: Look, wait. It wasn't just work. 947 00:48:35,815 --> 00:48:40,184 Your dinner? The crowded table? 948 00:48:40,186 --> 00:48:42,903 The intoxicating conversation? We had that. 949 00:48:44,857 --> 00:48:49,743 The moment you walked into my office. 950 00:48:49,779 --> 00:48:54,732 I will never forget the first time I ever saw you, Virginia. 951 00:48:54,767 --> 00:48:58,202 I was standing by the elevator in Maternity. 952 00:48:58,204 --> 00:49:01,955 And I turned, and there you were... 953 00:49:02,007 --> 00:49:04,308 behind the glass. 954 00:49:04,343 --> 00:49:09,046 And, granted, we were surrounded by patients and secretaries 955 00:49:09,098 --> 00:49:13,383 and the hospital loud speaker squawking down the hall, 956 00:49:13,436 --> 00:49:17,054 but just to dismiss that as only work... 957 00:49:17,106 --> 00:49:22,226 Well, that's a fairy tale, too. 958 00:49:22,278 --> 00:49:26,230 We would have found each other at that party. 959 00:49:26,232 --> 00:49:28,398 We would have stayed by each other's side. 960 00:49:28,451 --> 00:49:31,034 We would have found a way to see each other again. 961 00:49:35,958 --> 00:49:39,576 Virginia: Maybe we would have. 962 00:49:44,583 --> 00:49:50,053 But then again, we'll never know. 963 00:49:55,060 --> 00:49:57,261 [ Elevator starts ] 964 00:50:03,102 --> 00:50:04,768 Vincent: I should warn you... 965 00:50:04,820 --> 00:50:08,689 your husband is waiting in your apartment. 966 00:50:08,741 --> 00:50:11,024 Libby: Thank you. 967 00:50:38,604 --> 00:50:41,171 William: Come on. Go past-- 968 00:50:41,207 --> 00:50:44,641 [ TV announcer speaking indistinctly ] 969 00:50:44,643 --> 00:50:46,393 [ Doorbell rings ] 970 00:50:48,848 --> 00:50:52,616 Dennis? What are you... 971 00:50:54,820 --> 00:50:56,153 - It's after 9:00. - Dennis: I know. 972 00:50:56,205 --> 00:51:00,741 I was just... wondering why you didn't coach today. 973 00:51:00,793 --> 00:51:02,259 You didn't quit, did you? 974 00:51:02,294 --> 00:51:05,412 William: No. No, I-- I didn't quit. 975 00:51:05,464 --> 00:51:06,630 Does your mother know you're here? 976 00:51:06,665 --> 00:51:08,165 Dennis: My mom's out. 977 00:51:08,217 --> 00:51:10,751 William: Is she working? 978 00:51:10,803 --> 00:51:12,219 Dennis: Just out. 979 00:51:12,254 --> 00:51:16,139 William: Uh, I'm, uh, watching the game. 980 00:51:16,175 --> 00:51:17,374 You want to come in? 981 00:51:21,263 --> 00:51:23,180 Dennis: And you can give me my football. 982 00:51:35,361 --> 00:51:38,161 [ Knock on wall ] 983 00:51:38,197 --> 00:51:40,197 Dan: Well, I thought you'd left. 984 00:51:40,199 --> 00:51:41,365 Virginia: I had. 985 00:51:41,367 --> 00:51:43,200 But then I-- I remembered-- 986 00:51:43,252 --> 00:51:45,752 Dan: You remembered we had a good day 987 00:51:45,788 --> 00:51:47,537 and made some real progress. 988 00:51:49,708 --> 00:51:52,926 Virginia: Well, we're not quite there yet. 989 00:51:52,962 --> 00:51:55,245 That was a very small sampling. 990 00:51:55,281 --> 00:52:01,551 Dan: To the love potion inside sweat that makes poets write, 991 00:52:01,553 --> 00:52:04,221 artists paint, and turns a walk in the dark 992 00:52:04,223 --> 00:52:05,689 into a moonlight stroll. 993 00:52:05,724 --> 00:52:08,475 Are you hearing the zing of your heartstrings? 994 00:52:08,527 --> 00:52:09,893 Virginia: Not exactly. 995 00:52:09,895 --> 00:52:11,061 Dan: [ Chuckles ] 996 00:52:11,063 --> 00:52:12,696 Virginia: But then again, 997 00:52:12,731 --> 00:52:15,399 I'm not wired up to monitoring equipment, 998 00:52:15,401 --> 00:52:17,367 so perhaps I am feeling something 999 00:52:17,403 --> 00:52:18,568 but I'm just unaware. 1000 00:52:18,621 --> 00:52:21,071 Dan: You never wired yourself up, you and Bill? 1001 00:52:22,908 --> 00:52:25,909 Virginia: No. We never wired ourselves. 1002 00:52:25,961 --> 00:52:27,077 Dan: Mm. 1003 00:52:27,112 --> 00:52:29,212 Then let's do a little experiment. 1004 00:52:29,248 --> 00:52:31,214 Virginia: What kind of experiment? 1005 00:52:31,250 --> 00:52:33,917 Dan: Well, I'm still having a hard time believing 1006 00:52:33,919 --> 00:52:36,086 that a person's body can respond sexually 1007 00:52:36,138 --> 00:52:37,554 without the person knowing. 1008 00:52:37,589 --> 00:52:39,756 We're not moths. 1009 00:52:39,808 --> 00:52:44,594 Maybe people need to be inches away from each other, 1010 00:52:44,647 --> 00:52:47,130 which is why God invented dancing. 1011 00:52:47,166 --> 00:52:51,318 Virginia: [ Chuckles ] 1012 00:52:51,353 --> 00:52:53,020 This is hardly an experiment 1013 00:52:53,072 --> 00:52:55,906 that would stand up to any scientific standard. 1014 00:52:55,941 --> 00:52:59,326 Dan: It's a good thing I'm not a scientist. 1015 00:52:59,361 --> 00:53:02,779 But do you feel anything? 1016 00:53:02,781 --> 00:53:06,116 Any kind of, as you would say, physiological response? 1017 00:53:06,151 --> 00:53:08,618 Virginia: I don't. 1018 00:53:08,620 --> 00:53:11,338 Dan: Mm. Me neither. 1019 00:53:11,373 --> 00:53:15,292 But then again... 1020 00:53:15,344 --> 00:53:17,761 it's just what's happening on the surface. 1021 00:53:17,796 --> 00:53:20,130 As we learned today, we don't really know 1022 00:53:20,182 --> 00:53:23,517 what's happening in the... nether regions. 1023 00:53:23,552 --> 00:53:25,218 Virginia: Is that your technical term? 1024 00:53:25,270 --> 00:53:26,853 Dan: Your pudenda. 1025 00:53:26,889 --> 00:53:29,139 Virginia: [ Laughing ] No, that's too technical. 1026 00:53:29,191 --> 00:53:33,210 Dan: It's really nice to see you laugh, Virginia. 1027 00:53:39,234 --> 00:53:41,651 You still don't feel anything? 1028 00:53:41,653 --> 00:53:44,371 Virginia: No. 1029 00:53:44,406 --> 00:53:47,624 Dan: Mm. 1030 00:53:47,659 --> 00:53:50,410 Still? 1031 00:53:53,298 --> 00:53:55,048 Virginia: Still nothing. 1032 00:54:00,723 --> 00:54:05,592 William: 1933 football stars set, mint condition. 1033 00:54:05,644 --> 00:54:09,012 Took me two years to put together the whole collection. 1034 00:54:09,064 --> 00:54:10,597 Dennis: That is so cool. 1035 00:54:10,649 --> 00:54:13,433 I got a half collection from '64 somewhere. 1036 00:54:13,485 --> 00:54:14,851 William: Yeah? 1037 00:54:14,903 --> 00:54:19,256 Dennis: Things get lost a lot at my house. 1038 00:54:19,324 --> 00:54:21,241 William: You know, I'll tell you what. 1039 00:54:21,326 --> 00:54:25,445 You, uh... you pick out any card you like, 1040 00:54:25,497 --> 00:54:28,498 and, uh... just give me the stats, 1041 00:54:28,534 --> 00:54:32,169 and I will give you a quarter for any one I don't get. 1042 00:54:32,204 --> 00:54:35,922 Okay, go ahead. Any one you like. 1043 00:54:35,958 --> 00:54:39,292 Just the stats. 1044 00:54:39,344 --> 00:54:40,927 - You got one? - Dennis: Yes. 1045 00:54:40,963 --> 00:54:42,796 William: Go ahead. 1046 00:54:42,848 --> 00:54:46,149 Dennis: 1932, four touchdowns... 1047 00:55:13,712 --> 00:55:16,313 [ Television playing ] 1048 00:55:29,144 --> 00:55:33,396 Virginia: Tessa... it's almost midnight. 1049 00:55:33,432 --> 00:55:35,015 Tessa: Unless we're in different time zones, 1050 00:55:35,067 --> 00:55:36,099 it's midnight for you, too. 1051 00:55:36,135 --> 00:55:38,468 Virginia: Yes, but I'm not up by choice. 1052 00:55:38,504 --> 00:55:39,369 I had to work. 1053 00:55:39,404 --> 00:55:41,705 I like your hair. 1054 00:55:41,740 --> 00:55:44,941 Tessa: Took four washes and a bottle of mayonnaise, 1055 00:55:44,943 --> 00:55:46,710 but I got it back to normal. 1056 00:55:46,745 --> 00:55:48,945 Virginia: Well, you look pretty. 1057 00:55:48,981 --> 00:55:50,814 You-- you look like you. 1058 00:55:54,219 --> 00:55:56,670 What are you reading? 1059 00:55:56,705 --> 00:55:59,339 Tessa: There's a really interesting article 1060 00:55:59,374 --> 00:56:02,626 in "Teen Society" this month that I wanted to show you. 1061 00:56:02,628 --> 00:56:06,546 Virginia: Oh? What's it about? 1062 00:56:06,598 --> 00:56:08,465 Tessa: Well, I, um... 1063 00:56:13,472 --> 00:56:15,689 It's nothing important. 1064 00:56:15,724 --> 00:56:17,140 I think I'm gonna go to bed. 1065 00:56:17,192 --> 00:56:18,875 Virginia: No, honey. Show me. 1066 00:56:18,911 --> 00:56:21,111 Tessa: Tomorrow, okay? 1067 00:56:21,146 --> 00:56:24,948 Virginia: Okay. 1068 00:56:24,983 --> 00:56:28,451 - Good night. - Tessa: Good night. 1069 00:56:37,829 --> 00:56:40,330 Betty: Turns out your Hollywood couple 1070 00:56:40,332 --> 00:56:42,332 wasn't a complete waste of time. 1071 00:56:42,334 --> 00:56:44,417 It already led to one referral. 1072 00:56:49,675 --> 00:56:52,893 Steve: We know it's probably not your normal case, but, uh... 1073 00:56:52,928 --> 00:56:56,012 well, we just don't know where else to turn. 1074 00:56:56,064 --> 00:56:59,566 I mean, it's as if he's lost all interest in girls. 1075 00:56:59,601 --> 00:57:05,288 I mean, they're animals, after all. 1076 00:57:05,324 --> 00:57:07,190 How hard can it really be? 1077 00:57:07,242 --> 00:57:09,359 Man: ♪ whoa-oh, oh, oh ♪ 1078 00:57:09,361 --> 00:57:12,295 ♪ mmm, mmm, mmm, mmm ♪ 1079 00:57:12,331 --> 00:57:14,748 ♪ it's a light and tumble journey ♪ 1080 00:57:14,833 --> 00:57:17,968 ♪ from the east side to the park ♪ 1081 00:57:18,003 --> 00:57:24,674 ♪ just a fine and fancy ramble to the zoo ♪ 1082 00:57:24,710 --> 00:57:27,010 ♪ but you can take the cross-town bus ♪ 1083 00:57:27,045 --> 00:57:29,512 ♪ if it's raining or it's cold ♪ 1084 00:57:29,548 --> 00:57:32,093 ♪ and the animals will love it if you do ♪ 1085 00:57:32,094 --> 00:57:35,480 Sync and corrections by n17t01 www.addic7ed.com 1086 00:57:35,487 --> 00:57:38,021 ♪ if you do, now ♪ 1087 00:57:44,363 --> 00:57:49,366 ♪ something tells me it's all happening at the zoo ♪ 1088 00:57:49,401 --> 00:57:53,303 ♪ I do believe it ♪ 1089 00:57:53,338 --> 00:57:55,805 ♪ I do believe it's true ♪ 1090 00:57:55,841 --> 00:57:59,442 ♪ mm mm, mmm ♪ 1091 00:57:59,478 --> 00:58:02,379 ♪ mm mm mm, mmm ♪ 1092 00:58:02,414 --> 00:58:05,081 ♪ whoa-oh, oh, oh ♪ 1093 00:58:05,117 --> 00:58:08,118 ♪ mm mm mm, mmm ♪ 1094 00:58:08,186 --> 00:58:11,187 ♪ the monkeys stand for honesty ♪ 1095 00:58:11,223 --> 00:58:13,790 ♪ giraffes are insincere ♪ 1096 00:58:13,825 --> 00:58:19,996 ♪ and the elephants are kindly, but they're dumb ♪ 1097 00:58:20,032 --> 00:58:23,533 ♪ orangutans are skeptical of changes... ♪