1
00:00:07,837 --> 00:00:10,404
Really? Anybody wants to get a cut?

2
00:00:10,406 --> 00:00:12,740
Because there's no wait for my chair.

3
00:00:14,777 --> 00:00:16,310
They're smarter than that.

4
00:00:16,312 --> 00:00:18,012
They'd rather wait and get a decent cut.

5
00:00:19,649 --> 00:00:21,415
Smitty, you talking about being smart?

6
00:00:21,417 --> 00:00:24,919
You so dumb, it take you two
hours to watch "60 Minutes."

7
00:00:29,091 --> 00:00:31,125
It'd worked out a lot
funnier if you'd had said,

8
00:00:31,127 --> 00:00:34,361
"You so old, you was around
the time that joke was written."

9
00:00:34,363 --> 00:00:36,664
All right, all right, look, Kenny,

10
00:00:36,666 --> 00:00:39,400
if you're looking for
something to do, go mop, man.

11
00:00:39,402 --> 00:00:40,401
No, man, I'm cool.

12
00:00:40,403 --> 00:00:41,769
I'm just waiting for somebody get a trim.

13
00:00:41,771 --> 00:00:43,671
Hey, homie, what about you?

14
00:00:43,673 --> 00:00:45,573
No, no, you're not cool.

15
00:00:45,575 --> 00:00:48,809
Go on over here and mop
the floor, Mr. Apprentice.

16
00:00:48,811 --> 00:00:50,811
Look, I signed up to be
a barber's apprentice,

17
00:00:50,813 --> 00:00:52,112
not a janitor.

18
00:00:52,114 --> 00:00:55,282
And I guess you don't remember
I own this whole damn place.

19
00:00:56,485 --> 00:00:58,986
You're still going through
barber school, all right?

20
00:00:58,988 --> 00:01:00,287
So get to mopping.

21
00:01:00,289 --> 00:01:02,790
Man, it's not fair. I'm
always the one mopping up.

22
00:01:02,792 --> 00:01:07,361
Mm, is that... is that mop water

23
00:01:07,363 --> 00:01:09,797
or... Jay's cologne?

24
00:01:09,799 --> 00:01:13,033
Well, look, if it isn't the
wicked witch of the east.

25
00:01:13,035 --> 00:01:14,835
Dorothy went that way.

26
00:01:14,837 --> 00:01:16,070
Yeah, well you gonna follow her

27
00:01:16,072 --> 00:01:17,905
and let the wizard try to get you a brain.

28
00:01:17,907 --> 00:01:19,240
Now, Kenny, come on now,

29
00:01:19,242 --> 00:01:20,341
you need to put down
one of those yellow signs

30
00:01:20,343 --> 00:01:22,643
because somebody might slip.

31
00:01:22,645 --> 00:01:25,079
Why can't Smitty do it, man?
I'm always doing everything.

32
00:01:25,081 --> 00:01:27,948
Because Smitty got customers.

33
00:01:27,950 --> 00:01:29,383
Your mama got customers.

34
00:01:29,385 --> 00:01:30,851
What you say about my mama?

35
00:01:33,189 --> 00:01:36,357
Look, little man, I will
walk over there and... whoa!

36
00:01:37,860 --> 00:01:40,995
Smitty, are you okay?

37
00:01:40,997 --> 00:01:43,564
And the next time he say
something about my mama,

38
00:01:43,566 --> 00:01:46,000
it's gonna be his ass on the ground.

39
00:01:46,002 --> 00:01:48,335
Agh! I promise you.

40
00:02:01,816 --> 00:02:02,816
- synced and corrected by chamallow -
- www.addic7ed.com -

41
00:02:09,258 --> 00:02:11,859
You should have been there.

42
00:02:11,861 --> 00:02:14,862
Smitty was all wiling over, being all,

43
00:02:14,864 --> 00:02:16,797
"What'd you say about my mama?"

44
00:02:16,799 --> 00:02:19,233
Then all of a sudden, bam!

45
00:02:19,235 --> 00:02:23,270
He slipped and fell like a ton of bricks.

46
00:02:23,272 --> 00:02:25,839
Y'all talking about me?

47
00:02:25,841 --> 00:02:28,709
No, no, no man, we're talking
about the other Smitty,

48
00:02:28,711 --> 00:02:31,845
you know, who slipped and
fell and broke his arm and leg.

49
00:02:34,116 --> 00:02:36,817
All right, laugh it up, laugh it up.

50
00:02:36,819 --> 00:02:40,087
But don't expect me to share
any of my painkillers with you.

51
00:02:42,491 --> 00:02:43,924
Hey, Smitty, look, man,

52
00:02:43,926 --> 00:02:46,427
I really feel bad about what happened, man.

53
00:02:46,429 --> 00:02:49,463
So I got you this. No hard feelings?

54
00:02:49,465 --> 00:02:53,267
Man, didn't you already get
him chocolates and flowers?

55
00:02:53,269 --> 00:02:57,004
Oh, uh, Smitty does put
out on the first date.

56
00:02:57,006 --> 00:02:59,273
Don't pay him no mind. I appreciate it.

57
00:02:59,275 --> 00:03:00,474
No hard feelings.

58
00:03:00,476 --> 00:03:03,143
All right, man. Let me get that...

59
00:03:03,145 --> 00:03:04,645
No, no, I got it, I got it.

60
00:03:09,585 --> 00:03:13,587
Should you be mixing
alcohol with painkillers?

61
00:03:13,589 --> 00:03:15,923
Shouldn't you be minding your own business?

62
00:03:15,925 --> 00:03:17,658
Now who wants a cut?

63
00:03:17,660 --> 00:03:19,626
You, you next.

64
00:03:21,063 --> 00:03:22,830
Come on!

65
00:03:25,000 --> 00:03:26,300
- I'm fine!
- All right.

66
00:03:37,079 --> 00:03:39,680
Here, here, uh, let me help you, man.

67
00:03:39,682 --> 00:03:41,515
Leave me alone! Leave me alone!

68
00:03:50,292 --> 00:03:52,493
- Ooh!
- Wow.

69
00:03:52,495 --> 00:03:54,528
Cut me some slack, man,
I ain't left-handed.

70
00:03:54,530 --> 00:03:58,031
Man, listen, you sure you don't
want to take a few days off?

71
00:03:58,033 --> 00:03:59,933
- It's cool.
- Are you kidding, man?

72
00:03:59,935 --> 00:04:03,470
I still got hospital bills to pay.

73
00:04:03,472 --> 00:04:05,706
Listen, your insurance
policy doesn't cover that?

74
00:04:05,708 --> 00:04:09,810
Oh, man, don't get me
started on my insurance.

75
00:04:09,812 --> 00:04:11,578
Hey, hey, I'm s... hey.

76
00:04:11,580 --> 00:04:13,213
Come on, man.

77
00:04:13,215 --> 00:04:15,783
No, I still got insurance.

78
00:04:15,785 --> 00:04:17,251
It's just that after deductible

79
00:04:17,253 --> 00:04:19,186
and all that small print mumbo jumbo,

80
00:04:19,188 --> 00:04:20,821
I still owe thousands.

81
00:04:20,823 --> 00:04:22,556
Man, you better tip well, son.

82
00:04:22,558 --> 00:04:25,426
Yeah, uh, wow, it's like that?

83
00:04:25,428 --> 00:04:28,996
Oh, yeah, damn hospital
keep blowing air conditioning

84
00:04:28,998 --> 00:04:31,231
then charge you for every blanket they use.

85
00:04:31,233 --> 00:04:34,868
Well, I got an insurance policy.
I'm not sure what they cover.

86
00:04:34,870 --> 00:04:37,704
Well, you better figure it
out before something happens.

87
00:04:37,706 --> 00:04:39,139
Yeah, since we're on the subject,

88
00:04:39,141 --> 00:04:40,941
when's the last time
you got a check-up, Jay?

89
00:04:40,943 --> 00:04:45,913
What? Who me? You know,
like March or April.

90
00:04:45,915 --> 00:04:47,281
That's not that bad.

91
00:04:47,283 --> 00:04:48,749
Of '94.

92
00:04:48,751 --> 00:04:51,485
'94? Are you kidding me?

93
00:04:51,487 --> 00:04:54,121
Jay, man go get yourself checked out.

94
00:04:54,123 --> 00:04:55,789
I want you to be here for a while.

95
00:04:55,791 --> 00:04:57,558
- I just met your ass.
- Kid's right.

96
00:04:57,560 --> 00:05:00,494
Oh, well, now you want me to be alive.

97
00:05:00,496 --> 00:05:03,163
Last week you told me to drop dead.

98
00:05:03,165 --> 00:05:05,132
And I meant it, and
don't ever text my sister

99
00:05:05,134 --> 00:05:06,900
any pictures like that again.

100
00:05:06,902 --> 00:05:09,937
Why? She has unlimited texting.

101
00:05:15,211 --> 00:05:19,079
Hey, I'm getting pretty good
at cutting with my left hand.

102
00:05:19,081 --> 00:05:20,514
On second thought, maybe not.

103
00:05:20,516 --> 00:05:24,618
You weren't too good with
your right either, partner.

104
00:05:24,620 --> 00:05:26,854
- Hey, where you going?
- Restroom.

105
00:05:26,856 --> 00:05:28,422
I gotta go, too. Can you help me?

106
00:05:28,424 --> 00:05:29,957
Hell, no.

107
00:05:34,096 --> 00:05:35,929
What's the matter with you?

108
00:05:35,931 --> 00:05:38,065
Oh, I just got back
from my insurance agency.

109
00:05:38,067 --> 00:05:39,466
And?

110
00:05:39,468 --> 00:05:42,803
Well, it turns out that
my policy is garbage.

111
00:05:42,805 --> 00:05:46,006
It barely covers anything
beyond a Band-Aid.

112
00:05:46,008 --> 00:05:49,276
And the worst of all, my
premiums are gonna triple

113
00:05:49,278 --> 00:05:50,978
on my birthday in two months.

114
00:05:50,980 --> 00:05:52,679
Turns out that I'm high-risk.

115
00:05:52,681 --> 00:05:55,849
- You gonna switch providers?
- Yeah.

116
00:05:55,851 --> 00:05:58,619
To which one, I don't know. I
got to figure it out, though.

117
00:05:58,621 --> 00:06:01,788
- I only have two months.
- Two months?

118
00:06:01,790 --> 00:06:04,658
Wow, that's not a long time.

119
00:06:04,660 --> 00:06:07,961
No, not at all. You
know, but I'm glad I went.

120
00:06:07,963 --> 00:06:10,030
You know, uh, gives me a chance

121
00:06:10,032 --> 00:06:12,866
to get everything in
order, you know, sorted.

122
00:06:12,868 --> 00:06:15,235
Yeah, yeah, well, that's a good thing.

123
00:06:15,237 --> 00:06:17,170
Most people don't even get that.

124
00:06:17,172 --> 00:06:19,673
So you gonna talk to Kenny about it?

125
00:06:19,675 --> 00:06:22,910
No, no, man, I don't want him
to worry about it, you know?

126
00:06:22,912 --> 00:06:24,711
He'll start treating me differently.

127
00:06:24,713 --> 00:06:26,113
Treating you differently?

128
00:06:26,115 --> 00:06:28,482
Yeah, like an old man who
needs help with this paperwork.

129
00:06:29,818 --> 00:06:33,186
But you know, the good thing
is my checkup went really well.

130
00:06:33,188 --> 00:06:34,755
- Yeah?
- Yeah, yeah.

131
00:06:34,757 --> 00:06:36,857
You better get used to this face, Smitty.

132
00:06:36,859 --> 00:06:39,693
because I'm gonna be around for 100 years.

133
00:06:39,695 --> 00:06:41,228
You know what?

134
00:06:41,230 --> 00:06:43,730
I think I'm gonna text
your sister the good news.

135
00:06:43,732 --> 00:06:45,732
You know she's getting a
restraining order on you.

136
00:06:45,734 --> 00:06:47,501
I don't care. She loves me.

137
00:06:52,541 --> 00:06:55,776
Jay's dying. He's gonna die.

138
00:07:00,471 --> 00:07:03,105
Breathe, breathe.

139
00:07:03,107 --> 00:07:05,474
Now, what's going on?

140
00:07:05,476 --> 00:07:08,544
Jay just had his checkup,
and I overheard him saying

141
00:07:08,546 --> 00:07:11,280
that the doctor said he only
has two months left to live.

142
00:07:11,282 --> 00:07:14,784
My God. That is, like, so sad.

143
00:07:14,786 --> 00:07:17,486
But he's, like, so old,
so that makes sense.

144
00:07:17,488 --> 00:07:19,989
Old? I'm nearly his age.

145
00:07:19,991 --> 00:07:24,260
I know, that's what I said, "old."

146
00:07:24,262 --> 00:07:27,229
Well, look, I'll...
I'll just go over there.

147
00:07:27,231 --> 00:07:28,798
Wait, wait, wait, I'm sure Jay doesn't want

148
00:07:28,800 --> 00:07:30,232
any of us to know.

149
00:07:30,234 --> 00:07:32,201
He doesn't want to be treated differently.

150
00:07:32,203 --> 00:07:33,803
That's just like Jay... typical, selfish.

151
00:07:33,805 --> 00:07:35,671
He's dying, and it's all about him.

152
00:07:35,673 --> 00:07:37,373
Mmm-mmm, I'm with Jay on this one.

153
00:07:37,375 --> 00:07:39,208
Nobody likes to be pitied.

154
00:07:39,210 --> 00:07:40,776
Then how come when you and Gary broke up,

155
00:07:40,778 --> 00:07:43,446
you came in sobbing every day, screaming,

156
00:07:43,448 --> 00:07:46,115
"Take pity on me, take pity on me"?

157
00:07:46,117 --> 00:07:48,350
Because that was an
especially tough breakup,

158
00:07:48,352 --> 00:07:50,319
and I don't appreciate you bringing it up.

159
00:07:50,321 --> 00:07:52,054
You only dated for like two weeks.

160
00:07:52,056 --> 00:07:53,923
Which is like six months in gay time.

161
00:07:53,925 --> 00:07:57,159
And just what is exactly
is this "gay time?"

162
00:07:57,161 --> 00:07:59,995
Well... it's just like regular time

163
00:07:59,997 --> 00:08:02,932
except for when the big
hand touches the little hand,

164
00:08:02,934 --> 00:08:04,433
the little hand touches back.

165
00:08:04,435 --> 00:08:06,936
Man, nobody wanna hear all that.

166
00:08:06,938 --> 00:08:09,171
Nadine, what are we gonna do?

167
00:08:09,173 --> 00:08:11,740
Well, we just gotta make sure that Jay

168
00:08:11,742 --> 00:08:13,676
has the best two months possible.

169
00:08:13,678 --> 00:08:16,345
- That's all we can do.
- All right.

170
00:08:16,347 --> 00:08:17,513
Let's treat him to lunch.

171
00:08:17,515 --> 00:08:18,681
Oh, yeah, yeah, let's...

172
00:08:18,683 --> 00:08:20,649
but can you treat us both to lunch?

173
00:08:20,651 --> 00:08:23,319
I mean, I'm the one whose
alimony is about to dry up.

174
00:08:23,321 --> 00:08:25,521
- I wanna go to lunch, too.
- I could eat.

175
00:08:25,523 --> 00:08:27,122
No, Pharrell.

176
00:08:36,868 --> 00:08:38,400
What is this all about?

177
00:08:38,402 --> 00:08:40,469
Why are you two looking at me so funny?

178
00:08:40,471 --> 00:08:42,705
What, what, I can't sit
here and take my only pops

179
00:08:42,707 --> 00:08:44,073
out to lunch?

180
00:08:44,075 --> 00:08:45,374
Am I not allowed to look

181
00:08:45,376 --> 00:08:47,443
at one of the greatest loves of my life?

182
00:08:47,445 --> 00:08:49,378
Who wants gumbo?

183
00:08:49,380 --> 00:08:50,479
Gumbo?

184
00:08:50,481 --> 00:08:53,449
Gumbo today? I love your gumbo, Mabel.

185
00:08:53,451 --> 00:08:55,184
I know you do, baby.

186
00:08:55,186 --> 00:08:58,687
I caught the crabs as soon as I heard.

187
00:08:58,689 --> 00:08:59,855
Heard what?

188
00:08:59,857 --> 00:09:02,958
Uh... that you was coming by today.

189
00:09:02,960 --> 00:09:03,959
Oh.

190
00:09:03,961 --> 00:09:05,995
You always were my favorite customer.

191
00:09:05,997 --> 00:09:07,663
Still are.

192
00:09:07,665 --> 00:09:11,400
You let me tease you. Wouldn't
let me do nothing else.

193
00:09:11,402 --> 00:09:14,770
But you always were my favorite customer.

194
00:09:14,772 --> 00:09:17,339
Now that gumbo's on the house, all right?

195
00:09:17,341 --> 00:09:20,309
All right, well, in that
case, I'll take seconds.

196
00:09:26,150 --> 00:09:27,149
April!

197
00:09:27,151 --> 00:09:28,250
Yes?

198
00:09:28,252 --> 00:09:29,251
- Yeah, uh...
- Anything I can get you?

199
00:09:29,253 --> 00:09:30,486
- Yeah...
- Anything at all.

200
00:09:30,488 --> 00:09:33,322
Yeah, I'm dying for a...

201
00:09:33,324 --> 00:09:35,724
Root beer.

202
00:09:35,726 --> 00:09:38,160
It's coming up.

203
00:09:38,162 --> 00:09:41,063
It's coming up.

204
00:09:41,065 --> 00:09:42,431
What's wrong with her?

205
00:09:42,433 --> 00:09:45,167
Maybe her braid's too tight,
boy problems, I don't know.

206
00:09:45,169 --> 00:09:48,304
She wouldn't have those problems
if you would get with her.

207
00:09:48,306 --> 00:09:51,073
I'm telling you, Ken, life is too short.

208
00:09:51,075 --> 00:09:54,343
You'll always regret
squandering opportunities.

209
00:09:54,345 --> 00:09:58,347
Oh, Jay, why weren't you this
wise when we were married?

210
00:09:58,349 --> 00:10:02,751
I was this wise if you would
just shut up and listen.

211
00:10:02,753 --> 00:10:04,553
Maybe you're right, Jay.

212
00:10:04,555 --> 00:10:07,856
Maybe I'm right? What is
wrong with you, woman?!

213
00:10:07,858 --> 00:10:10,426
Jay, so is there anything
that you wanted to do

214
00:10:10,428 --> 00:10:11,660
but just never got a chance?

215
00:10:11,662 --> 00:10:13,929
Yeah. Janet Jackson.

216
00:10:15,499 --> 00:10:17,399
I mean, something more on the lines of...

217
00:10:17,401 --> 00:10:19,668
Like a bucket list, you know, before I die?

218
00:10:19,670 --> 00:10:21,804
What? No! Die?

219
00:10:21,806 --> 00:10:23,405
Nothing like that.

220
00:10:23,407 --> 00:10:27,643
Something more like you could
do when you want to live, man!

221
00:10:27,645 --> 00:10:30,879
Uh... I can't think of anything.

222
00:10:30,881 --> 00:10:33,782
You never wanted to travel anywhere?

223
00:10:33,784 --> 00:10:35,884
I mean, me visiting other countries

224
00:10:35,886 --> 00:10:37,720
has been a great experience for me.

225
00:10:37,722 --> 00:10:40,155
Well, you know, I have been thinking

226
00:10:40,157 --> 00:10:41,624
about visiting Saudi Arabia.

227
00:10:41,626 --> 00:10:43,025
- Ahh.
- Really?

228
00:10:43,027 --> 00:10:45,327
Yeah, Janet Jackson moved there.

229
00:10:45,329 --> 00:10:48,063
- With her husband?
- Semantics.

230
00:10:49,667 --> 00:10:52,334
Oh, well, it's about time.

231
00:10:52,336 --> 00:10:54,203
I'm not gonna live forever, you know.

232
00:10:54,205 --> 00:10:55,871
Oh, man, I can't.

233
00:10:55,873 --> 00:10:57,906
I'm taking my break!

234
00:10:57,908 --> 00:10:59,708
Thank...

235
00:11:13,624 --> 00:11:17,726
Wow, you're really getting
good with that left hand, huh?

236
00:11:17,728 --> 00:11:19,228
You ambidextrous?

237
00:11:19,230 --> 00:11:21,163
Hell, no, I like women.

238
00:11:21,165 --> 00:11:24,400
No, ambidextrous is... never mind.

239
00:11:24,402 --> 00:11:26,769
I don't have time to
explain. You know what?

240
00:11:26,771 --> 00:11:29,938
Just hold on, I gotta look this over.

241
00:11:29,940 --> 00:11:31,774
Oh, that your insurance stuff?

242
00:11:31,776 --> 00:11:33,909
Yeah, yeah, my buddy Troy,

243
00:11:33,911 --> 00:11:36,211
he really hooked me up
with some great policies.

244
00:11:36,213 --> 00:11:38,113
Health insurance, renter's insurance,

245
00:11:38,115 --> 00:11:41,083
life insurance... man, if I croak,

246
00:11:41,085 --> 00:11:44,119
my benefactors, they gonna be loaded.

247
00:11:49,326 --> 00:11:51,593
That's why they're being so nice to me.

248
00:11:51,595 --> 00:11:53,562
Who being nice to you?

249
00:11:53,564 --> 00:11:55,130
Nadine and Kenny.

250
00:11:55,132 --> 00:11:59,134
Oh, those conniving sons of bitches!

251
00:11:59,136 --> 00:12:01,503
Yeah, how dare they be nice to you?

252
00:12:01,505 --> 00:12:02,738
Nice?

253
00:12:02,740 --> 00:12:06,241
They're being the
complete opposite of nice.

254
00:12:06,243 --> 00:12:08,110
They're plotting to kill me.

255
00:12:18,997 --> 00:12:20,530
What in the world would make you think

256
00:12:20,532 --> 00:12:22,699
Kenny and Nadine are trying to kill you?

257
00:12:22,701 --> 00:12:24,400
I can't believe I didn't
see this yesterday.

258
00:12:24,402 --> 00:12:26,202
I don't think I see it now.

259
00:12:26,204 --> 00:12:29,539
Come on, Smitty, it's the
oldest trick in the book.

260
00:12:29,541 --> 00:12:34,010
They're being extra nice to
me, and when my guard's down,

261
00:12:34,012 --> 00:12:35,812
they strike!

262
00:12:35,814 --> 00:12:39,249
You are way too paranoid.
What's the next thing?

263
00:12:39,251 --> 00:12:41,050
You start thinking I'm trying to kill you?

264
00:12:41,052 --> 00:12:43,519
Why would you kill me, huh?

265
00:12:43,521 --> 00:12:45,622
If I die, you get nothing.

266
00:12:45,624 --> 00:12:47,056
Wow.

267
00:12:47,058 --> 00:12:49,859
I think that hurt more than
breaking my arm and my leg.

268
00:12:49,861 --> 00:12:52,328
Hey, Smitty, your car's being towed.

269
00:12:52,330 --> 00:12:53,696
What? But I'm handicapped.

270
00:12:53,698 --> 00:12:55,231
I'm entitled to park in a blue zone.

271
00:12:55,233 --> 00:12:56,566
But you parked in the red zone.

272
00:12:56,568 --> 00:12:58,067
I can't help that I'm color blinded.

273
00:12:58,069 --> 00:13:00,370
Here.

274
00:13:00,372 --> 00:13:03,806
Help! Help! Somebody call the police.

275
00:13:03,808 --> 00:13:06,476
Tell them a white man's car being towed!

276
00:13:08,713 --> 00:13:10,813
What's up, Jay, you want
me to finish that shave up?

277
00:13:10,815 --> 00:13:13,549
No, you know what? I think Smitty,

278
00:13:13,551 --> 00:13:15,184
he's got enough... he's got enough done.

279
00:13:15,186 --> 00:13:17,620
Don't be ridiculous, man, I got you.

280
00:13:17,622 --> 00:13:19,956
I know like how these
things feel in your hand.

281
00:13:19,958 --> 00:13:21,391
Go ahead.

282
00:13:25,730 --> 00:13:27,630
Well...

283
00:13:27,632 --> 00:13:31,501
Cutting me pretty close, aren't you?

284
00:13:31,503 --> 00:13:33,236
You want a close shave, don't you?

285
00:13:33,238 --> 00:13:36,172
Mm-hmm, yeah, uh, listen, son...

286
00:13:36,174 --> 00:13:38,141
I do mean "son"...

287
00:13:38,143 --> 00:13:40,843
listen, if your mother had
told me about you sooner,

288
00:13:40,845 --> 00:13:43,446
I would have been there for
you, you know that, don't you?

289
00:13:43,448 --> 00:13:44,647
- Sure I do.
- Yeah.

290
00:13:44,649 --> 00:13:46,382
But that doesn't matter now.

291
00:13:46,384 --> 00:13:48,951
I'm just glad I got a chance to know you.

292
00:13:48,953 --> 00:13:50,787
"Got to"?

293
00:13:50,789 --> 00:13:53,823
There's still plenty of
me to get to know. Plenty!

294
00:13:53,825 --> 00:13:56,292
Have I ever told you I love you, son?

295
00:13:56,294 --> 00:13:59,228
Wow. Really?

296
00:13:59,230 --> 00:14:00,430
Uh-huh. Mm-hmm.

297
00:14:00,432 --> 00:14:01,964
I love you, too.

298
00:14:03,868 --> 00:14:05,568
Agh!

299
00:14:05,570 --> 00:14:07,637
That's right! Ah-ha!

300
00:14:07,639 --> 00:14:10,540
Never let your guard down.

301
00:14:10,542 --> 00:14:11,774
What are you talking about?

302
00:14:11,776 --> 00:14:14,010
you know damn well what I'm talking about.

303
00:14:31,763 --> 00:14:33,696
I'm sorry.

304
00:14:33,698 --> 00:14:35,131
What the hell are you doing here?

305
00:14:35,133 --> 00:14:37,867
I didn't mean to scare
you. Ken gave me the key.

306
00:14:37,869 --> 00:14:39,335
Why?

307
00:14:39,337 --> 00:14:41,704
Well, I figured, two
single guys living alone,

308
00:14:41,706 --> 00:14:44,006
you can't get that many home-cooked meals.

309
00:14:44,008 --> 00:14:46,442
Well, you never cooked for
me when we were married.

310
00:14:46,444 --> 00:14:48,311
Look, you want the damn catfish or not?

311
00:14:48,313 --> 00:14:50,847
- You got catfish going on?
- Mm-hmm!

312
00:14:50,849 --> 00:14:52,415
See? Taste it.

313
00:14:52,417 --> 00:14:54,650
You taste it first.

314
00:14:54,652 --> 00:14:55,818
All right.

315
00:14:59,424 --> 00:15:01,090
What you looking at?

316
00:15:01,092 --> 00:15:03,926
Trying to see if you gonna drop dead.

317
00:15:03,928 --> 00:15:05,561
Very funny.

318
00:15:05,563 --> 00:15:07,463
Jay, we need to talk.

319
00:15:07,465 --> 00:15:09,565
Yeah, we... we do need to talk.

320
00:15:09,567 --> 00:15:11,267
All right, you first.

321
00:15:11,269 --> 00:15:13,569
Look...

322
00:15:13,571 --> 00:15:15,671
I know.

323
00:15:15,673 --> 00:15:16,773
You know what?

324
00:15:16,775 --> 00:15:18,741
Don't play games with me, Jay.

325
00:15:18,743 --> 00:15:22,678
It's me, all right? I know. Ken told me.

326
00:15:22,680 --> 00:15:26,416
I don't know what the
hell you're talking about.

327
00:15:26,418 --> 00:15:27,850
Look, I understand.

328
00:15:27,852 --> 00:15:29,685
You don't want to be treated differently,

329
00:15:29,687 --> 00:15:32,755
but... you're terminal.

330
00:15:32,757 --> 00:15:34,023
That's a fact.

331
00:15:34,025 --> 00:15:36,025
So you need to just give up and give in

332
00:15:36,027 --> 00:15:40,129
and share that with the
people who care about you.

333
00:15:40,131 --> 00:15:41,664
Terminal?

334
00:15:41,666 --> 00:15:44,000
What... oh... oh.

335
00:15:44,002 --> 00:15:46,102
That feels great, yeah.

336
00:15:46,104 --> 00:15:47,403
Doesn't that feel nice?

337
00:15:47,405 --> 00:15:49,138
Oh, that feels nice.

338
00:15:49,140 --> 00:15:52,275
Yeah, so open up and let people in.

339
00:15:52,277 --> 00:15:54,877
Let them in, let them...
oh, a little to the right.

340
00:15:54,879 --> 00:15:57,213
Yeah, got a little crook there. Yes.

341
00:15:57,215 --> 00:15:59,215
Look, I know we have our differences,

342
00:15:59,217 --> 00:16:01,984
but I love you, Jay, and
I just want you to know

343
00:16:01,986 --> 00:16:05,655
I will do anything... anything you want

344
00:16:05,657 --> 00:16:07,924
to help you transition on.

345
00:16:10,562 --> 00:16:11,727
Anything?

346
00:16:13,231 --> 00:16:14,564
Mama.

347
00:16:30,348 --> 00:16:33,149
Man...

348
00:16:33,151 --> 00:16:36,385
I have officially sunk
to the lowest of lows.

349
00:16:36,387 --> 00:16:39,655
Whatever it is, Jay, it can't be that bad.

350
00:16:39,657 --> 00:16:42,158
I slept with my ex-wife.

351
00:16:42,160 --> 00:16:43,426
That's bad.

352
00:16:43,428 --> 00:16:46,062
Here, take my pain pills.

353
00:16:46,064 --> 00:16:49,465
You're gonna need them more than I do.

354
00:16:49,467 --> 00:16:51,901
If these don't work. I
got a shotgun in the back.

355
00:17:09,409 --> 00:17:11,276
All right, remember,
let's not overwhelm him.

356
00:17:11,278 --> 00:17:14,012
Kenny's right, now we just want Jay to know

357
00:17:14,014 --> 00:17:16,781
that we're all here for him no matter what.

358
00:17:16,783 --> 00:17:18,583
That don't mean we all gotta
sleep with him, does it?

359
00:17:19,586 --> 00:17:22,287
What? He just ain't my type.

360
00:17:22,289 --> 00:17:24,823
Isabel, can't you keep one damn secret?

361
00:17:24,825 --> 00:17:26,858
Not something that gross.

362
00:17:26,860 --> 00:17:30,829
He need somebody to
sleep with? I volunteer.

363
00:17:32,466 --> 00:17:33,865
What?

364
00:17:33,867 --> 00:17:35,867
That is no different than
what the Make-A-Wish does

365
00:17:35,869 --> 00:17:37,168
for those poor kids.

366
00:17:40,874 --> 00:17:43,408
Hey, here he comes. Everybody hide!

367
00:17:47,347 --> 00:17:49,347
No wait, wait! I mean just do whatever.

368
00:17:50,851 --> 00:17:52,951
All right, Mabel, what's the damn emerg...

369
00:17:52,953 --> 00:17:54,519
Surprise!

370
00:17:54,521 --> 00:17:57,222
What the hell is this?

371
00:17:57,224 --> 00:17:58,790
Oh, Jay, we just want you to know

372
00:17:58,792 --> 00:18:00,625
that you don't have to
go through all this alone

373
00:18:00,627 --> 00:18:03,561
and we pooled our money
together and got you this.

374
00:18:03,563 --> 00:18:06,464
Round trip tickets for
a palace in Saudi Arabia.

375
00:18:06,466 --> 00:18:08,299
- What?
- All inclusive...

376
00:18:08,301 --> 00:18:11,302
food, drink, spa
treatment, and read a review

377
00:18:11,304 --> 00:18:13,938
that said Janet Jackson
stays there sometimes.

378
00:18:13,940 --> 00:18:16,307
Wow!

379
00:18:16,309 --> 00:18:19,110
You really do care about poor old Jay, huh?

380
00:18:19,112 --> 00:18:20,712
Yeah, man. Bring it in, y'all.

381
00:18:24,451 --> 00:18:25,517
Hey, hey!

382
00:18:25,519 --> 00:18:28,553
Jay? I also wrote you a poem.

383
00:18:28,555 --> 00:18:30,522
Listen to this.

384
00:18:30,524 --> 00:18:32,424
"Roses are red, violets are blue... "

385
00:18:32,426 --> 00:18:34,426
Hold that thought, I gotta run

386
00:18:34,428 --> 00:18:35,593
to the little barber's room.

387
00:18:35,595 --> 00:18:37,262
Real quick.

388
00:18:37,264 --> 00:18:39,097
- All right.
- Leavin' on his way to death.

389
00:18:40,233 --> 00:18:42,033
Sorry I'm late. Y'all.

390
00:18:42,035 --> 00:18:43,935
Did I miss the, uh...

391
00:18:43,937 --> 00:18:45,437
What are we doing here again?

392
00:18:45,439 --> 00:18:47,305
We're throwing Jay a going-away party.

393
00:18:47,307 --> 00:18:49,941
Oh yeah, cool, cool. Where he's going?

394
00:18:49,943 --> 00:18:51,843
To a better place.

395
00:18:51,845 --> 00:18:52,844
Maui?

396
00:18:52,846 --> 00:18:54,612
He's dying, you stupido.

397
00:18:54,614 --> 00:18:57,348
He's dying? Jay's dying?!

398
00:18:57,350 --> 00:19:01,519
Ohh! Take me, Jesus! Take me...

399
00:19:01,521 --> 00:19:04,122
Wait a minute, remember,
you knew this already.

400
00:19:04,124 --> 00:19:05,857
The other day Jay told you

401
00:19:05,859 --> 00:19:07,492
he had two months to live and you was like,

402
00:19:07,494 --> 00:19:10,028
"That's not a lot of time?"

403
00:19:10,030 --> 00:19:11,696
The other day?

404
00:19:11,698 --> 00:19:13,631
Oh, no, no, no, he was saying

405
00:19:13,633 --> 00:19:16,201
he had two months left to
switch insurance providers.

406
00:19:16,203 --> 00:19:19,871
What?! Wait, you mean that
jackass isn't terminal?

407
00:19:19,873 --> 00:19:21,339
No, no, no, he's healthy as a horse.

408
00:19:21,341 --> 00:19:23,575
- I think I'm gonna throw up.
- So Jay's not dying?

409
00:19:23,577 --> 00:19:26,478
Oh, he's dying, I'm gonna
make sure he's gonna die.

410
00:19:26,480 --> 00:19:27,912
When he ate your cooking,
that's what he thought

411
00:19:27,914 --> 00:19:29,047
you was trying to do to him.

412
00:19:29,049 --> 00:19:30,882
All right, all right, where were we?

413
00:19:30,884 --> 00:19:33,618
Oh, April, you were reading your poem.

414
00:19:33,620 --> 00:19:35,386
That was mighty fast.

415
00:19:35,388 --> 00:19:37,989
Did you even wash your little nasty hands?

416
00:19:37,991 --> 00:19:39,757
No, I ain't reading no damn poem.

417
00:19:42,229 --> 00:19:46,564
Look, you'd make an old,
sick old man real happy.

418
00:19:46,566 --> 00:19:48,299
Oh, I'll finish her poem.

419
00:19:48,301 --> 00:19:49,868
Roses are red, violets are blue,

420
00:19:49,870 --> 00:19:52,370
I'm gonna beat the living crap out of you.

421
00:19:52,372 --> 00:19:55,974
That's not cheering me up. Who's next, huh?

422
00:19:55,976 --> 00:19:57,976
Anybody else got a present for me?

423
00:19:57,978 --> 00:20:02,213
Isabel.  Let me see that beautiful smile.

424
00:20:02,215 --> 00:20:04,549
They know you're not dying.

425
00:20:04,551 --> 00:20:08,453
They... they do?

426
00:20:08,455 --> 00:20:11,723
Well, I'm gonna take off now.

427
00:20:11,725 --> 00:20:13,091
Thank you for the little party and...

428
00:20:13,093 --> 00:20:15,927
I cannot believe I let you sleep with me.

429
00:20:15,929 --> 00:20:17,362
And I cannot believe I considered

430
00:20:17,364 --> 00:20:18,796
letting you sleep with me.

431
00:20:18,798 --> 00:20:22,433
To hell with that. I'll
still sleep with you.

432
00:20:22,435 --> 00:20:24,669
What?

433
00:20:24,671 --> 00:20:27,906
Yeah, uh, listen, Nadine,

434
00:20:27,908 --> 00:20:30,275
I'm sorry, I couldn't resist.

435
00:20:30,277 --> 00:20:32,844
It's like taking candy from a baby,

436
00:20:32,846 --> 00:20:36,181
only it was more stale old candy

437
00:20:36,183 --> 00:20:39,317
from a real old, old baby.

438
00:20:39,319 --> 00:20:43,321
Man, give me these tickets
back. What was you thinking?

439
00:20:43,323 --> 00:20:45,924
What were you gonna do in two
months when you didn't die?

440
00:20:45,926 --> 00:20:49,093
Well, I thought you'd all
be so happy I survived,

441
00:20:49,095 --> 00:20:50,094
you wouldn't question it.

442
00:20:52,933 --> 00:20:54,999
Wait, wait, wait, wait!

443
00:20:55,001 --> 00:20:58,636
I can't keep up with who thought
who was dying or who was lying

444
00:20:58,638 --> 00:21:00,338
to who about what, where?

445
00:21:00,340 --> 00:21:03,741
But I do know we all love Jay.

446
00:21:03,743 --> 00:21:07,545
And if he's healthy,
shouldn't we all be happy?

447
00:21:07,547 --> 00:21:11,316
I'll be happy when I
run over Jay with my car.

448
00:21:11,318 --> 00:21:14,385
Hold on, man, hey, look, Smitty's right.

449
00:21:14,387 --> 00:21:16,721
Jay, what you did was wrong, brother,

450
00:21:16,723 --> 00:21:19,457
but it all brought us closer together,

451
00:21:19,459 --> 00:21:21,559
and, hey, maybe that was a good thing.

452
00:21:21,561 --> 00:21:24,362
So here, I still want
you to go on your trip.

453
00:21:24,364 --> 00:21:25,763
Plane leaves tomorrow.

454
00:21:25,765 --> 00:21:28,800
Oh, thank you. Thank you, Kenny.

455
00:21:28,802 --> 00:21:31,369
At least somebody cares about me.

456
00:21:31,371 --> 00:21:35,640
I'm just gonna take off before
Nadine bites my head off!

457
00:21:35,642 --> 00:21:40,044
That was so nice of you,
Kenny. Not that he deserves it.

458
00:21:40,046 --> 00:21:42,513
Wasn't that nice. I got the return ticket.

459
00:21:42,515 --> 00:21:44,349
He's gonna have a lot to think about

460
00:21:44,351 --> 00:21:45,950
when he's stranded in Saudi Arabia.

461
00:21:45,952 --> 00:21:49,087
- Oh!
- I like the way you think!

462
00:21:49,089 --> 00:21:51,256
Love you! I love you!

463
00:21:51,257 --> 00:21:54,938
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