1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:03,956 (Birdsong) 2 00:00:12,760 --> 00:00:16,992 Huh. Looks like whatever we went through only goes one way. 3 00:00:17,080 --> 00:00:20,356 - Let's hope we're home. - No signal. 4 00:00:20,440 --> 00:00:22,590 If we are, my place is just around the corner. 5 00:00:25,560 --> 00:00:27,630 This is where Kate and me are getting married. 6 00:00:27,720 --> 00:00:29,995 Just want to get home and see her. 7 00:00:30,080 --> 00:00:32,230 Supposed to be looking at flower arrangements 8 00:00:32,320 --> 00:00:34,754 and then one phone call from you and here we are. 9 00:00:34,840 --> 00:00:36,796 You're welcome. 10 00:00:36,880 --> 00:00:40,475 Come on, flower arrangements are boring as shit. 11 00:00:40,560 --> 00:00:42,039 You may have a point. 12 00:00:42,120 --> 00:00:44,429 Most things about weddings are pretty shit. 13 00:00:44,520 --> 00:00:47,592 I mean, you spend months freaking out 14 00:00:47,680 --> 00:00:52,310 about the biggest party you're ever gonna throw and arguing about seating arrangements. 15 00:00:52,400 --> 00:00:54,868 "Do you want to go for the salmon or the beef?" 16 00:00:55,600 --> 00:00:58,114 And then you sign a bit of paper... 17 00:00:59,320 --> 00:01:01,151 ...and she owns half your stuff. 18 00:01:01,240 --> 00:01:03,231 What exactly is the attraction there? 19 00:01:03,320 --> 00:01:05,880 Says the man who hasn't had a girlfriend in three years. 20 00:01:05,960 --> 00:01:07,473 What about Sarah? 21 00:01:07,560 --> 00:01:09,994 A hand-job in the toilets at Nando's does not qualify. 22 00:01:10,080 --> 00:01:12,275 At least she doesn't get half my stuff. 23 00:01:12,360 --> 00:01:14,316 You don't have any stuff. 24 00:01:17,000 --> 00:01:18,558 Are you saying that I'm boring? 25 00:01:18,640 --> 00:01:20,915 And what is so great about being married, then? 26 00:01:21,000 --> 00:01:23,275 I want to settle down with the woman that I love. 27 00:01:23,360 --> 00:01:25,794 That just doesn't sound like the Dangerous Dan I knew. 28 00:01:25,880 --> 00:01:27,996 At least I know what I want from life. 29 00:01:34,160 --> 00:01:35,513 Duck! 30 00:01:38,120 --> 00:01:40,634 Stop it! (Muffled protest) 31 00:01:56,680 --> 00:01:58,875 - Is he still there? - He's smoking. 32 00:01:58,960 --> 00:02:01,633 Why's he smoking in my house? That's so rude. 33 00:02:01,720 --> 00:02:03,199 (Gasps) 34 00:02:22,800 --> 00:02:25,189 - (Screaming) - Get it off! Get it off! Fire! 35 00:02:25,560 --> 00:02:31,157 ♪ I'd cry but you're too small 36 00:02:36,760 --> 00:02:39,228 ♪ Your brains 37 00:02:39,320 --> 00:02:44,075 ♪ Are dripping down my wall 38 00:02:48,120 --> 00:02:50,714 Balls. I loved this cardigan. 39 00:02:52,000 --> 00:02:58,000 Ripped By mstoll 40 00:02:59,400 --> 00:03:01,356 I love what you've done with the place, man. 41 00:03:01,440 --> 00:03:03,396 (Flies buzz) 42 00:03:07,400 --> 00:03:08,879 Oh, God! 43 00:03:08,960 --> 00:03:11,713 Oh, I'm never gonna get used to seeing myself dead. 44 00:03:11,800 --> 00:03:13,631 It's weird, eh? 45 00:03:13,720 --> 00:03:15,278 It looks like we're spooning. 46 00:03:15,360 --> 00:03:16,873 Yeah, it is kind of nice, isn't it? 47 00:03:16,960 --> 00:03:19,394 No. No. Seeing our own dead bodies 48 00:03:19,480 --> 00:03:23,439 get rigor mortis in the spooning position is not "kind of nice". 49 00:03:23,520 --> 00:03:26,193 I hate to say it, but this is kind of a good thing. 50 00:03:27,680 --> 00:03:30,638 Cos Callum's already killed us in this reality which means... 51 00:03:30,720 --> 00:03:32,915 Chances are he isn't coming back. We've got time. 52 00:03:33,000 --> 00:03:34,956 Time to what? 53 00:03:35,040 --> 00:03:36,996 Take stock. Have a shower. 54 00:03:37,080 --> 00:03:39,594 OK, cool. We could look for Callum Stevens again. 55 00:03:39,680 --> 00:03:41,398 - Goldenmire. - Now we're talking. 56 00:03:41,480 --> 00:03:44,392 We have plenty of time. We have nothing to worry about. 57 00:03:44,480 --> 00:03:46,152 - (Door opens) KATE: We're back. 58 00:03:46,240 --> 00:03:47,958 - Except that. - Hi, shitbags. 59 00:03:48,040 --> 00:03:49,792 Hey, fucknose. 60 00:03:49,880 --> 00:03:52,633 Milo. Oh my God! 61 00:03:52,720 --> 00:03:56,474 - Paul. - It has been like a shaft of a long time, right? 62 00:03:56,560 --> 00:04:00,599 I thought you basically just stayed at your house now and never left like a hermit crab. 63 00:04:00,680 --> 00:04:02,352 Why are you elbowing me? Ow! 64 00:04:02,440 --> 00:04:05,477 It's really nice to see you out and about. 65 00:04:06,800 --> 00:04:09,268 - Whoa, whoa... - Excuse me! 66 00:04:09,360 --> 00:04:12,432 - What do you want? I can get it for you. - I want to sit down. 67 00:04:12,520 --> 00:04:17,196 Sit down here. You know, grab a coffee and have a chat and a... great time. 68 00:04:18,160 --> 00:04:19,878 What is going on? What's in there? 69 00:04:19,960 --> 00:04:21,916 No, no, no, no. It's erm... (Groans) 70 00:04:22,000 --> 00:04:26,676 Erm... a present for you and... 71 00:04:27,600 --> 00:04:29,875 ...I haven't wrapped it yet. 72 00:04:29,960 --> 00:04:33,919 Aw, Danny! You know that delayed gratification is definitely not my thing! 73 00:04:34,000 --> 00:04:37,470 - No, no, no! I let one rip in there. - It was really bad. 74 00:04:37,560 --> 00:04:39,039 - So intense. - Very bad. 75 00:04:39,120 --> 00:04:40,678 - I'm sorry. - Urgh... 76 00:04:40,760 --> 00:04:42,159 That's not cool, bro. 77 00:04:46,080 --> 00:04:47,513 What the shit are we gonna do? 78 00:04:47,600 --> 00:04:50,034 OK, OK. Erm... you keep them busy. 79 00:04:50,120 --> 00:04:52,759 - I'll clear away the bodies. - Me? Paul and Kate hate me! 80 00:04:52,840 --> 00:04:55,229 Maybe in this reality you'll get on really well. 81 00:04:55,320 --> 00:04:58,232 You deal with them, I will... hide us. 82 00:04:58,320 --> 00:05:01,596 All right, hands up. Who's thirsty for rugger? 83 00:05:01,680 --> 00:05:03,238 Rugby is what I mean by that. 84 00:05:06,240 --> 00:05:08,196 Oh, I know what I meant to show you. 85 00:05:13,560 --> 00:05:14,879 Is that cocaine? 86 00:05:14,960 --> 00:05:16,712 (Milo groans) 87 00:05:16,800 --> 00:05:19,030 (Mimicking) "Is that cocaine?" Er... yeah! 88 00:05:19,120 --> 00:05:21,554 I believe it is. It's not as good as the shit we had last week 89 00:05:21,640 --> 00:05:24,632 - but it will still fuck your skull quite nicely. - OK. 90 00:05:26,760 --> 00:05:29,035 Where did you get such a massive amount of coke? 91 00:05:29,120 --> 00:05:31,190 Don't worry. It's from Tesco. 92 00:05:31,280 --> 00:05:34,829 The Waitrose shit is twice as expensive and not really any better. 93 00:05:34,920 --> 00:05:38,037 This game is turning into one spicy enchilada. 94 00:05:38,120 --> 00:05:40,475 I'm gonna go peep it on the widescreen next door. 95 00:05:40,560 --> 00:05:44,394 No, no. You... You can't. Milo's, you know, it was an epic smell. 96 00:05:44,480 --> 00:05:46,118 You really don't want to go in there. 97 00:05:46,200 --> 00:05:48,634 I'm no stranger to a wee bit of farteggio, Capitan. 98 00:05:48,720 --> 00:05:50,039 (Laughs) Chillax. 99 00:05:50,120 --> 00:05:52,076 Wait, wait... 100 00:05:56,520 --> 00:05:57,873 (Panting) 101 00:05:59,520 --> 00:06:01,476 (Air raid sirens) 102 00:06:01,560 --> 00:06:04,552 - Come on. - What's going on? 103 00:06:04,640 --> 00:06:06,596 Ha, ha, ha. Come on. Let's go. 104 00:06:06,680 --> 00:06:10,798 Yeah, OK, yeah. Let's... go. Let's do that. Milo? 105 00:06:15,240 --> 00:06:17,708 - Milo? - Danny, seriously, come on. 106 00:06:21,560 --> 00:06:23,039 Danny? 107 00:06:23,120 --> 00:06:25,475 What about Milo? I need to tell him where we're going. 108 00:06:25,560 --> 00:06:28,757 - Like he doesn't know. Come on. TANNOY: This is not a drill. 109 00:06:28,840 --> 00:06:32,719 Emergency. This is not a drill. 110 00:06:47,320 --> 00:06:48,753 Holy shit! 111 00:06:48,840 --> 00:06:54,039 Secretary Gauloir needs to talk some sense into the Koreans then the Chinese will fall in line. 112 00:06:54,120 --> 00:06:55,951 - Easy. - What? 113 00:06:56,680 --> 00:06:58,432 It's not just the slant-eyes. 114 00:06:58,520 --> 00:07:00,670 The Russians are playing silly buggers as well. 115 00:07:00,760 --> 00:07:03,115 All that vodka, I reckon. Fried their 'mind-skis.' 116 00:07:03,200 --> 00:07:05,156 Again, what? 117 00:07:05,240 --> 00:07:07,834 I know you don't like talking about all the ins and outs of it. 118 00:07:07,920 --> 00:07:11,071 - But it's the world we live in. - Maybe we should talk about it. 119 00:07:11,160 --> 00:07:15,517 Imagine I didn't know anything, I had no idea what you were talking about. 120 00:07:15,600 --> 00:07:17,830 How would you summarise the whole... 121 00:07:18,880 --> 00:07:20,359 ...whatever's going on? 122 00:07:20,440 --> 00:07:23,716 Fascinating challenge, hermano! Challenge accepted... 123 00:07:23,800 --> 00:07:25,870 Can we just get in the shelter first? 124 00:07:25,960 --> 00:07:27,712 Shelter? 125 00:07:27,800 --> 00:07:29,233 Come on. 126 00:07:33,880 --> 00:07:35,836 ♪ Ride Of The Valkyries 127 00:07:48,520 --> 00:07:50,476 Weird song choice. 128 00:07:57,000 --> 00:07:58,433 (Siren) 129 00:07:58,520 --> 00:08:00,511 MAN: Please may I have your attention. 130 00:08:00,600 --> 00:08:02,431 The all-clear has been given. 131 00:08:03,640 --> 00:08:07,110 You may return to your homes. Attention... 132 00:08:07,200 --> 00:08:09,509 Where the hell did you disappear to? 133 00:08:10,880 --> 00:08:13,269 - Oh! - I called for you. 134 00:08:13,360 --> 00:08:14,588 How did you even find us? 135 00:08:14,680 --> 00:08:18,468 The first person I saw asked why I wasn't in "the shelter" then sent me in this direction. 136 00:08:18,560 --> 00:08:20,630 I'm gonna talk to Paul about something. 137 00:08:20,720 --> 00:08:22,756 (Mocking) OK, yeah. See you in a bit. 138 00:08:22,840 --> 00:08:25,991 - Cosy. - Listen, you are never gonna believe this. 139 00:08:26,080 --> 00:08:29,038 That we almost got nuked? Yeah, I noticed. What's going on? 140 00:08:29,120 --> 00:08:31,156 Have you ever heard of the Cuban Missile crisis? 141 00:08:32,040 --> 00:08:33,871 If I say yes, will you believe me? 142 00:08:33,960 --> 00:08:35,313 No, me neither. 143 00:08:35,400 --> 00:08:40,269 Russia, Korea, parts of China and a bunch of countries with 'istan' at the end of their names, 144 00:08:40,360 --> 00:08:42,476 have got nukes pointed at Europe and America. 145 00:08:42,560 --> 00:08:44,676 We've had nukes pointed back at them for years. 146 00:08:44,760 --> 00:08:46,591 Only it's getting worse, not better. 147 00:08:46,680 --> 00:08:49,148 Both sides are making threats, no one's backing down. 148 00:08:49,240 --> 00:08:51,515 That is quite the pickle, mon frére. 149 00:08:51,600 --> 00:08:53,909 So how do we go about getting the fuck out of here, eh? 150 00:08:54,000 --> 00:08:55,433 - We need a plan. - I have no idea. 151 00:08:55,520 --> 00:08:58,034 Brace your backside, hermano. Exciting times ahead. 152 00:08:58,120 --> 00:09:01,590 I've been talking to Paul about a surprise for you so follow me. 153 00:09:01,680 --> 00:09:05,036 OK, OK. You go do what you need to be doing here and I'll go. 154 00:09:05,120 --> 00:09:07,429 Meet you back at The Cat's Tail in an hour or so. 155 00:09:07,520 --> 00:09:11,433 Sure, OK. So, what's going on? 156 00:09:16,400 --> 00:09:18,834 Can I take this off my eyes yet? It stinks. 157 00:09:18,920 --> 00:09:23,198 True that, my lad. My feet sweat so much sometimes I feel like I'm paddling. 158 00:09:23,280 --> 00:09:26,317 Nice. So, where are we? 159 00:09:26,400 --> 00:09:28,595 I feel like we've been walking around in circles. 160 00:09:31,280 --> 00:09:33,157 Ta-da! 161 00:09:34,120 --> 00:09:35,678 We're in the church. 162 00:09:35,760 --> 00:09:38,149 So I literally have been walking round in circles. 163 00:09:38,240 --> 00:09:42,597 I know Hartley's kind of naff, but time's short and it seems we're having an alert every other day 164 00:09:42,680 --> 00:09:45,558 so I thought let's do it, let's get married right now! 165 00:09:45,640 --> 00:09:47,676 - Kapow! What? MAN: Ssh! 166 00:09:47,760 --> 00:09:50,115 So all of these people are getting married? 167 00:09:50,200 --> 00:09:52,668 What's the matter with you today? Usually up for anything. 168 00:09:53,800 --> 00:09:55,518 Of course I am. I'm not boring, 169 00:09:55,600 --> 00:09:57,716 I'm totally up for anything. 170 00:09:59,840 --> 00:10:01,796 Yeah, let's... let's do it! 171 00:10:01,880 --> 00:10:04,474 Let's get fucking hitched, babes! Sorry. 172 00:10:09,400 --> 00:10:11,709 Hello? Gran, are you home? 173 00:10:20,840 --> 00:10:22,398 Oh, no. 174 00:10:22,480 --> 00:10:25,278 ♪ I get out of bed when the moon disappears 175 00:10:26,000 --> 00:10:27,433 You may kiss the bride. 176 00:10:31,240 --> 00:10:34,755 OK. Who do we have? Daniel Gates and Kate Riddle? 177 00:10:34,840 --> 00:10:36,796 And Paul. 178 00:10:38,400 --> 00:10:41,790 Just to confirm that you've applied for a short-notice marriage licence 179 00:10:41,880 --> 00:10:45,077 under the Edmund Jonah Hartley Act of 2011? 180 00:10:45,160 --> 00:10:47,071 - Is that correct? - Yes, yes. 181 00:10:47,160 --> 00:10:48,752 That is us. 182 00:10:48,840 --> 00:10:52,230 ♪ I'm gonna be what you want me to be 183 00:10:52,320 --> 00:10:54,276 ♪ I do, do, do 184 00:10:54,360 --> 00:10:56,954 So, unless there are any objections 185 00:10:57,040 --> 00:10:58,917 it's time to get you two lovebirds married. 186 00:11:00,120 --> 00:11:01,519 ♪ I do, do, do 187 00:11:02,160 --> 00:11:04,993 ♪ I do, do, do it all for you 188 00:11:10,800 --> 00:11:12,756 Oh, wait a second. 189 00:11:12,840 --> 00:11:14,671 (Laughs) 190 00:11:17,840 --> 00:11:19,990 - (Gasps) - I... I shouldn't. 191 00:11:20,080 --> 00:11:22,196 Whisky gives me diarrhoea. 192 00:11:22,280 --> 00:11:25,033 Yeah, screw it. Why not? 193 00:11:27,640 --> 00:11:29,596 Right, bring it! 194 00:11:29,680 --> 00:11:31,557 Yeah, bring it. 195 00:11:37,480 --> 00:11:38,913 - Oh my God. - Hey. 196 00:11:39,000 --> 00:11:40,035 There you are. Look. 197 00:11:40,120 --> 00:11:42,395 This place is like a Cuban bar here. 198 00:11:42,480 --> 00:11:47,395 Right, don't stay out too long, dickwad, or I might have to chain you up again. Mm... 199 00:11:47,480 --> 00:11:50,074 See you later, Mr Gates. 200 00:11:50,160 --> 00:11:52,390 See you inside, Mrs Gates. 201 00:11:53,560 --> 00:11:55,551 Did she just? 202 00:11:55,640 --> 00:11:58,154 (Gasps) That's why there's a party in there! 203 00:11:58,240 --> 00:12:00,549 You tied the knot! You sly bastard, you got married! 204 00:12:00,640 --> 00:12:01,914 I didn't have a choice. 205 00:12:02,000 --> 00:12:05,754 You know the bit where it says, "Do you take this woman to be your wife?" You say no. 206 00:12:05,840 --> 00:12:08,149 I was trying to keep a low profile, blend in. 207 00:12:08,240 --> 00:12:10,310 You're the one that said I always play it safe. 208 00:12:10,400 --> 00:12:12,391 You're trying to prove something, I love it. 209 00:12:12,480 --> 00:12:15,756 Good on you, mate. Anyway, look what I found at home. 210 00:12:15,840 --> 00:12:17,831 - Another clue. - How do you know? 211 00:12:17,920 --> 00:12:19,558 Last time we got a cryptic message 212 00:12:19,640 --> 00:12:22,313 about something only we know about, it led us to the gateway. 213 00:12:22,400 --> 00:12:24,868 "The place where we nicked the halogen lights from." 214 00:12:24,960 --> 00:12:27,758 - Our old school kitchen? - Yes... 215 00:12:27,840 --> 00:12:29,990 Wahey! Danny! 216 00:12:30,080 --> 00:12:32,548 Finally settling down, eh? 217 00:12:32,640 --> 00:12:33,834 Dad, are you smoking a blunt? 218 00:12:33,920 --> 00:12:36,798 You know I don't smoke weed, son. This is Afghan heroin. 219 00:12:36,880 --> 00:12:39,314 - Kim loves it. - Kim? 220 00:12:39,400 --> 00:12:41,516 Oh, here we go again with the lecture. 221 00:12:41,600 --> 00:12:44,558 Just because Kim is a teenage Korean rent boy 222 00:12:44,640 --> 00:12:48,428 does not mean our relationship isn't very meaningful. 223 00:12:48,520 --> 00:12:52,672 Besides, that boy gobbles it up like it was satay chicken. 224 00:12:52,760 --> 00:12:56,639 Everything you said is wrong on so many levels. 225 00:12:56,720 --> 00:12:59,393 Your problem is you're too bloody repressed, Danny. 226 00:12:59,480 --> 00:13:01,835 You disappoint me, son. 227 00:13:03,880 --> 00:13:06,519 OK, what just happened? 228 00:13:06,600 --> 00:13:09,910 Clearly living with the threat of nuclear annihilation makes people go crazy. 229 00:13:10,000 --> 00:13:11,149 Come on, let's go. 230 00:13:11,240 --> 00:13:13,117 - Wait, I should tell Kate. - Well, what? 231 00:13:13,200 --> 00:13:14,952 Tell her you're from a parallel world? 232 00:13:15,040 --> 00:13:18,112 The Danny she thought she married is in the garden shed in the lawnmower? 233 00:13:18,200 --> 00:13:20,031 - I feel bad for her. - I know, I know. 234 00:13:20,120 --> 00:13:22,554 But you didn't kill this world's Danny. Or Milo. 235 00:13:22,640 --> 00:13:24,596 None of this is fair, but we have to go. 236 00:13:24,680 --> 00:13:26,636 - OK. - Yes, thank you. 237 00:13:32,760 --> 00:13:34,716 This is the right place, isn't it? 238 00:13:34,800 --> 00:13:37,678 Yeah. Except it isn't our school any more. 239 00:13:37,760 --> 00:13:40,069 They've turned it into this Chair thing. 240 00:13:48,480 --> 00:13:49,595 - Hiya. - Hello. 241 00:13:49,680 --> 00:13:52,194 We're just wondering if you could help us. 242 00:13:52,280 --> 00:13:54,555 What is this place? 243 00:13:54,640 --> 00:13:56,756 See, we used to go to school here. 244 00:13:56,840 --> 00:13:58,478 We were hoping to get inside. 245 00:13:58,560 --> 00:14:00,915 Bit of a trip down memory lane, kind of thing. 246 00:14:01,000 --> 00:14:04,879 - It'd be a really magical night if you let us in. - Hm? 247 00:14:04,960 --> 00:14:06,552 He's like one of those Queen's Guards. 248 00:14:08,000 --> 00:14:09,991 Mate, your flies are undone, by the way. 249 00:14:10,080 --> 00:14:12,355 Ooh, he's good. 250 00:14:12,440 --> 00:14:15,591 Come on, Milo. Clearly we're not wanted here because... 251 00:14:15,680 --> 00:14:18,956 (Yelling)... Fattyboy can't take it! 252 00:14:21,040 --> 00:14:22,996 He really is good, actually. 253 00:14:23,080 --> 00:14:25,071 - That's skill. - He's moving. 254 00:14:25,160 --> 00:14:28,357 He's moving! Go! Shit, shit! 255 00:14:33,720 --> 00:14:35,199 (Panting) 256 00:14:35,760 --> 00:14:37,910 It's not far now. Come on! 257 00:14:38,000 --> 00:14:39,718 We're nearly at the gateway. 258 00:14:39,800 --> 00:14:41,711 - How did he find us? - Same way he always does. 259 00:14:41,800 --> 00:14:43,472 Come on! 260 00:14:50,280 --> 00:14:51,838 You can press the button any time. 261 00:14:51,920 --> 00:14:53,717 And go all the way back? No way. 262 00:14:53,800 --> 00:14:56,109 We need to find the others. They might need us. 263 00:14:56,200 --> 00:14:57,872 We sure as shit need them. Come on! 264 00:15:08,600 --> 00:15:10,352 ALL: Fuck! 265 00:15:13,640 --> 00:15:15,596 (Lounge music playing) 266 00:15:17,320 --> 00:15:19,754 We'll find a way in, we'll find Callum. 267 00:15:19,840 --> 00:15:22,035 We put our minds to it, and we'll be fine. 268 00:15:22,120 --> 00:15:24,190 And while we're here it does seem like drugs 269 00:15:24,280 --> 00:15:28,558 are incredibly easy to come by in this world, so that is always an option. 270 00:15:28,640 --> 00:15:31,279 Hey! Where you been? 271 00:15:31,360 --> 00:15:33,316 Mwah! 272 00:15:33,400 --> 00:15:35,356 Let's go. 273 00:15:35,440 --> 00:15:38,716 I'll come round tomorrow, we'll regroup. I'll figure a way out of here. 274 00:15:38,800 --> 00:15:40,028 Happy honeymoon. 275 00:15:40,120 --> 00:15:42,475 I'm not gonna do anything. That would be cheating. 276 00:15:42,560 --> 00:15:46,314 In this world, anything goes. You saw your dad. Afghan heroin and a Malaysian rent boy. 277 00:15:46,400 --> 00:15:47,913 - Korean. - What's the difference? 278 00:15:48,000 --> 00:15:51,675 Racism. Look, point is, live it up. Remember Dangerous Dan? 279 00:15:51,760 --> 00:15:52,909 He would have done it. 280 00:15:53,000 --> 00:15:54,956 Why are you so desperate for me to cheat on Kate? 281 00:15:55,040 --> 00:15:58,749 Is it cheating, though? Can you cheat on a person with themselves? 282 00:15:58,840 --> 00:16:03,118 But it's not her. That's like saying if we gave hand-jobs to versions of ourselves 283 00:16:03,200 --> 00:16:05,395 from another reality, that wouldn't be weird. 284 00:16:06,480 --> 00:16:08,072 Yeah, that's definitely weird. 285 00:16:08,160 --> 00:16:12,119 You're avoiding my question. Why do you want me to cheat on Kate? 286 00:16:12,200 --> 00:16:13,679 All I wanna do is get home. 287 00:16:13,760 --> 00:16:15,398 All right? As far as I'm concerned, 288 00:16:15,480 --> 00:16:19,189 the sooner you get laid, the sooner you stop moping about Kate and focus on getting back. 289 00:16:19,280 --> 00:16:21,396 All right? And maybe, just once, 290 00:16:21,480 --> 00:16:24,631 you can try enjoying yourself. 291 00:16:25,760 --> 00:16:27,716 Get in there. 292 00:16:31,760 --> 00:16:33,716 Bye. 293 00:16:42,440 --> 00:16:47,070 Mm, no, sorry. Erm... I'm a bit... drunk. 294 00:16:47,160 --> 00:16:50,197 Hm, you likey the helpey? 295 00:16:50,280 --> 00:16:54,512 (Chuckles) Me no likey the helpey. 296 00:16:54,600 --> 00:16:57,433 Erm... Erm... I'm battered. 297 00:16:57,520 --> 00:17:02,310 I've got some acid. We could just pound that and then I really want to get naked. 298 00:17:09,080 --> 00:17:10,433 (Snoring) 299 00:17:11,120 --> 00:17:13,475 MILO: I'm not that bothered it's gone up in smoke. 300 00:17:13,560 --> 00:17:18,236 Flames...fire, death. Who gives a fuck? I don't. 301 00:17:18,320 --> 00:17:20,151 I hate my life. 302 00:17:22,800 --> 00:17:24,916 TANNOY: There is now a state of emergency 303 00:17:25,000 --> 00:17:27,992 in the Civil Defence headquarters with the army being called up. 304 00:17:28,080 --> 00:17:29,991 The rest of the army is on standby. 305 00:17:30,080 --> 00:17:32,469 They can also be called up in 24 hours... 306 00:17:39,600 --> 00:17:41,158 Milo? 307 00:17:45,360 --> 00:17:46,759 Milo? 308 00:17:51,360 --> 00:17:54,397 Callum Stevens specialises in foreskin piercing. 309 00:17:54,480 --> 00:17:56,675 Hm. If you're ever in Stoke-on-Trent 310 00:17:56,760 --> 00:17:59,832 and you need an expert in genital mutilation, he is your guy. 311 00:17:59,920 --> 00:18:03,230 He's not our guy, but... none of them are. 312 00:18:04,440 --> 00:18:08,558 I got into Other Me's email account and er... well, he was a total recluse. 313 00:18:08,640 --> 00:18:12,269 This whole nuclear shit freaked him out and he just never went anywhere. 314 00:18:12,360 --> 00:18:14,874 How did his dead body end up at the Other Me's flat? 315 00:18:16,880 --> 00:18:19,110 Well, by the looks of it, there was a fight here. 316 00:18:19,200 --> 00:18:23,751 I'm guessing Other Me went to hide with Other You and was killed anyway. 317 00:18:23,840 --> 00:18:28,436 And no one cares. He was... all alone. 318 00:18:30,120 --> 00:18:32,839 Unlike you, hm? Mr Married. 319 00:18:32,920 --> 00:18:35,639 - Nothing happened if you're asking. - Sure. 320 00:18:35,720 --> 00:18:39,474 - Did you find anything that could help us? - As a matter of fact, I did. 321 00:18:42,480 --> 00:18:46,234 Oh, er... I was watching a film last night... 322 00:18:46,320 --> 00:18:50,359 Yeah. Russian Korean American Gangbang Five. 323 00:18:50,440 --> 00:18:52,431 Mm. It's actually a real thing here. 324 00:18:52,520 --> 00:18:55,034 Something about everyone wanting to blow each other up. 325 00:18:55,120 --> 00:18:57,395 The film actually has a really positive message. 326 00:18:57,480 --> 00:19:02,793 It just sort of says, "Hey, maybe if we have more anal sex, there might not be a war." 327 00:19:02,880 --> 00:19:04,154 Profound. 328 00:19:04,240 --> 00:19:06,708 It is, yeah. Here's the school now. 329 00:19:06,800 --> 00:19:11,237 It got sold off to a private security company a few years ago. 330 00:19:12,240 --> 00:19:16,756 For just £10,000 a year, we are offering up the Chair package. 331 00:19:16,840 --> 00:19:20,310 So a few years back, our school got sold to a private security company. 332 00:19:20,400 --> 00:19:23,153 A lead-lined bunker, guaranteed by scientists, 333 00:19:23,240 --> 00:19:26,038 to withstand a direct nuclear blast. 334 00:19:26,120 --> 00:19:31,353 This fully air-conditioned bunker has been designed as an optimal living space. 335 00:19:31,440 --> 00:19:36,309 The Chair boasts cinema, café, washing facilities, 336 00:19:36,400 --> 00:19:39,278 an extensive narcotics cabinet and wine fridge. 337 00:19:39,360 --> 00:19:43,433 And best of all, your own personal pod. 338 00:19:43,520 --> 00:19:45,875 For just £10,000 a year, 339 00:19:45,960 --> 00:19:49,635 you will have the peace of mind that if the unthinkable does happen, 340 00:19:49,720 --> 00:19:54,555 in The Chair, everything will be OK. 341 00:20:01,040 --> 00:20:03,315 How the hell are Goldenmire involved in this? 342 00:20:03,400 --> 00:20:09,953 OK, OK. So all we have to do is break into a private high-security nuclear bunker 343 00:20:10,040 --> 00:20:12,600 before we find ourselves in the middle of World War III. 344 00:20:12,680 --> 00:20:13,749 Easy. 345 00:20:16,480 --> 00:20:18,710 Why have you not been answering your phone? 346 00:20:18,800 --> 00:20:21,917 - Have you seen the news? - No. 347 00:20:25,120 --> 00:20:28,715 TV: Stay with us as we continue to bring you up-to-date news around the clock 348 00:20:28,800 --> 00:20:31,189 following Prime Minister Andre's announcement. 349 00:20:31,280 --> 00:20:33,669 After UN negotiations broke down, 350 00:20:33,760 --> 00:20:38,390 we hoped the Russian and Korean alliance would at least consider what was at stake. 351 00:20:38,480 --> 00:20:42,837 But 25 minutes ago, the Russian leader walked out on proceedings. 352 00:20:42,920 --> 00:20:44,433 War has been declared. 353 00:20:44,960 --> 00:20:50,876 A direct nuclear attack on UK soil is not now merely possible, it's inevitable. 354 00:20:50,960 --> 00:20:55,158 I urge you to stay calm, stay with your loved ones. 355 00:20:55,240 --> 00:20:59,153 Find your own mysterious girl and get close to her. 356 00:20:59,240 --> 00:21:01,117 Oh, my God. 357 00:21:01,200 --> 00:21:03,953 I know. When did Peter Andre become Prime Minister? 358 00:21:04,040 --> 00:21:06,952 It's OK. We'll get on a train. We'll go north, go to Wales. 359 00:21:07,560 --> 00:21:09,278 How will we get past the blockades? 360 00:21:10,040 --> 00:21:12,508 So this is it? This is how I go out? 361 00:21:12,600 --> 00:21:15,717 This isn't fair. I've... I've done everything right. 362 00:21:15,800 --> 00:21:20,430 The job, the wedding, the sensible house... and this is what I get? 363 00:21:38,440 --> 00:21:40,192 (Clears throat) 364 00:21:40,280 --> 00:21:42,236 (Clears throat more forcibly) 365 00:21:42,320 --> 00:21:44,072 Guys, still here. 366 00:21:45,560 --> 00:21:48,154 Excuse us, Milo. We've got some business. 367 00:21:48,240 --> 00:21:49,753 Dan, what's got into you? 368 00:21:57,320 --> 00:21:59,276 ♪ Cos I'm falling 369 00:21:59,360 --> 00:22:00,679 ♪ Falling 370 00:22:00,760 --> 00:22:03,115 ♪ Falling now, deep for you 371 00:22:06,160 --> 00:22:08,116 Dangerous Dan. 372 00:22:10,920 --> 00:22:11,520 - Argh! TANNOY: Please remain calm. 373 00:22:11,520 --> 00:22:13,511 - Argh! TANNOY: Please remain calm. 374 00:22:13,600 --> 00:22:17,559 We advise you to continue with your life as normal. 375 00:22:17,640 --> 00:22:19,232 There is nothing to worry about. 376 00:22:21,120 --> 00:22:23,918 - Hey. - Hey. 377 00:22:27,520 --> 00:22:30,273 Well, that was... different. 378 00:22:31,320 --> 00:22:32,833 I think we can do better. 379 00:22:32,920 --> 00:22:34,797 I went out to get some supplies. 380 00:22:34,880 --> 00:22:36,836 What do you mean? 381 00:22:36,920 --> 00:22:39,434 The world can end any day and this is our honeymoon. 382 00:22:39,520 --> 00:22:42,239 We should be going fucking berserk, pushing the boat out. 383 00:22:42,320 --> 00:22:44,390 For starters, now that we're married, 384 00:22:44,480 --> 00:22:46,038 I think we should try anal. 385 00:22:47,640 --> 00:22:50,393 OK. Yeah. Brilliant! 386 00:23:03,120 --> 00:23:04,997 OK, what is that for? 387 00:23:05,080 --> 00:23:07,036 Buckle up, big boy! 388 00:23:07,120 --> 00:23:09,236 Hey, hey, hey, hey! I don't know about this. 389 00:23:09,320 --> 00:23:11,197 - Just relax. - Oh, my God! 390 00:23:11,280 --> 00:23:12,793 Is it in? Are you inside me? 391 00:23:12,880 --> 00:23:14,632 No, I'm just putting on some lube! 392 00:23:14,720 --> 00:23:16,711 - It's nowhere near it. - I'm really not sure. 393 00:23:16,800 --> 00:23:18,518 - Just the tip. - It might hurt! 394 00:23:18,600 --> 00:23:21,194 Just calm down, deep breaths. I will be gentle! 395 00:23:21,280 --> 00:23:23,236 I don't want to! 396 00:23:23,320 --> 00:23:25,276 (Laughs) 397 00:23:27,480 --> 00:23:30,358 I have never known you to say no to anything. 398 00:23:31,760 --> 00:23:34,149 But if you don't fancy it, we don't have to do it. 399 00:23:34,240 --> 00:23:37,152 OK? But if there's anything you want to try, 400 00:23:38,280 --> 00:23:41,670 then now is the time because there literally might not be a tomorrow. 401 00:23:43,800 --> 00:23:48,078 So, tell me, what is your fantasy? 402 00:23:52,040 --> 00:23:53,268 (Kate giggles) 403 00:23:53,360 --> 00:23:55,316 (Music plays) 404 00:23:55,400 --> 00:23:57,630 (Laughter and chatter) 405 00:24:03,000 --> 00:24:04,274 Ah, Pete. 406 00:24:04,360 --> 00:24:06,920 Do we know each other? 407 00:24:07,000 --> 00:24:08,831 In another life, maybe. 408 00:24:08,920 --> 00:24:13,391 JD and some ketamine. If it's really the end of the world, let's get fucked up. 409 00:24:14,480 --> 00:24:16,072 This will do. 410 00:24:16,560 --> 00:24:20,519 Pete, do you know about that bunker, the one that is where Cromwell school used to be? 411 00:24:20,600 --> 00:24:23,034 Yeah, why? You got a seat? 412 00:24:23,680 --> 00:24:26,592 You can have a night with my wife. She's big, but she's keen. 413 00:24:26,680 --> 00:24:29,240 No, I don't. And I'm all right for that. 414 00:24:29,320 --> 00:24:32,630 I was just wondering has anyone tried to, like, storm the place? 415 00:24:32,720 --> 00:24:35,075 I've never really thought about that before. 416 00:24:35,160 --> 00:24:36,912 Yeah. 417 00:24:38,520 --> 00:24:40,875 - See you around, son. - (Door crashes open) 418 00:24:42,240 --> 00:24:44,879 - Danny? - Wagwan, motherfucker! 419 00:24:44,960 --> 00:24:46,871 - Nah, nah! - Thought I'd find you here. 420 00:24:46,960 --> 00:24:49,428 You were totally right, mate. 421 00:24:49,520 --> 00:24:52,478 Getting married, working in insurance, playing it safe. 422 00:24:52,560 --> 00:24:53,675 No more, Milo, my man. 423 00:24:53,760 --> 00:24:55,318 Yeah, yeah. What are you wearing? 424 00:24:55,400 --> 00:24:57,675 I stole it, baby! And guess what? 425 00:24:57,760 --> 00:25:00,115 Me and Kate, we did it a lot. 426 00:25:00,200 --> 00:25:03,909 We did... all kinds of things. You know, sex things. 427 00:25:04,000 --> 00:25:06,560 Then I left her sleeping. I've been stealing shit ever since. 428 00:25:06,640 --> 00:25:10,315 - Excellent. - Yeah. I got erm... drugs from the supermarket. 429 00:25:10,400 --> 00:25:12,118 Booze. 430 00:25:12,200 --> 00:25:14,873 - Love that. - Pringles! Everyone loves Pringles. 431 00:25:15,680 --> 00:25:18,399 - (Rock music starts) - I fucking love this song! 432 00:25:18,480 --> 00:25:20,710 Yes! Get in! 433 00:25:20,800 --> 00:25:23,633 Here I come! Godzilla! (Whooping) 434 00:25:23,720 --> 00:25:25,551 Aha-ha-ha! 435 00:25:25,640 --> 00:25:27,915 I'm gonna go steal more stuff. Dangerous Dan is back! 436 00:25:28,000 --> 00:25:30,639 Tell... Tell him what you told me about the bunker. 437 00:25:30,720 --> 00:25:33,188 That we should storm it? 438 00:25:33,280 --> 00:25:35,236 - Yeah! - (All cheer) 439 00:25:36,040 --> 00:25:40,113 Why not? All we're doing is sitting round here getting off our heads. 440 00:25:40,200 --> 00:25:44,034 So why not do something? Let's storm the bunker. 441 00:25:44,120 --> 00:25:45,439 (Cheering) 442 00:25:46,400 --> 00:25:51,076 Why do they get to sit in first class while we are reduced to dust? 443 00:25:51,160 --> 00:25:52,912 - Yeah! - (Cheering) 444 00:25:53,000 --> 00:25:54,911 Who died and made them King of England? 445 00:25:55,000 --> 00:25:57,560 Not us, that's for sure. Let's take back the power. 446 00:25:57,640 --> 00:26:00,234 Power to the little man. Take back what's ours! 447 00:26:00,320 --> 00:26:02,709 (AII chanting) Take back what's ours! 448 00:26:02,800 --> 00:26:05,678 Take back what's ours! Take back what's ours! 449 00:26:05,760 --> 00:26:07,716 (Cheering) 450 00:26:08,640 --> 00:26:09,709 OK... 451 00:26:10,880 --> 00:26:12,552 Viva la revoluciôn! 452 00:26:12,640 --> 00:26:14,596 (Cheering) 453 00:26:14,680 --> 00:26:16,830 Yes, revolution! 454 00:26:24,880 --> 00:26:27,952 Oi! Well, hello, Fattyboy. You gonna let us in now, please? 455 00:26:28,040 --> 00:26:30,190 Step away from the fence, sir. 456 00:26:30,280 --> 00:26:34,592 This is private property and we are licensed to respond with force. 457 00:26:34,680 --> 00:26:36,671 We're here to take back what's ours. 458 00:26:36,760 --> 00:26:39,228 (Cheering and chanting) Take back what's... 459 00:26:41,400 --> 00:26:43,630 - (Gasping) - Oh, shit! 460 00:26:43,720 --> 00:26:45,551 - Oh, man... - No... 461 00:26:45,640 --> 00:26:48,313 Now, I'm asking you to step back! 462 00:26:48,400 --> 00:26:49,674 Yes, sure. 463 00:26:50,440 --> 00:26:52,396 (Muttering from crowd) 464 00:26:52,480 --> 00:26:54,436 (Car horn blasts) 465 00:26:54,520 --> 00:26:57,432 DANNY: Milo! I got your black! 466 00:26:57,520 --> 00:26:59,875 - What? - Back, sorry. 467 00:26:59,960 --> 00:27:01,791 I... I got your back. 468 00:27:01,880 --> 00:27:03,518 Where did you get a car from? 469 00:27:03,600 --> 00:27:05,556 I stole it, baby! 470 00:27:08,960 --> 00:27:10,916 (Screeching tyres) 471 00:27:14,560 --> 00:27:16,516 (All gasp) 472 00:27:18,240 --> 00:27:20,595 - Balls. - Move back from the fence. 473 00:27:20,680 --> 00:27:23,513 - (Jeering) - This is private property. 474 00:27:27,800 --> 00:27:29,392 We're gonna get nuked, aren't we? 475 00:27:29,480 --> 00:27:30,833 You saw Peter Andre. 476 00:27:30,920 --> 00:27:34,310 That was a guy that knew we were totally gonna get nuked. 477 00:27:36,480 --> 00:27:37,674 Fuck! 478 00:27:38,520 --> 00:27:41,512 I've just started living, Milo. I've just started fucking living! 479 00:27:42,520 --> 00:27:44,397 What if I'd been more like you, you know? 480 00:27:44,480 --> 00:27:47,552 - You just do what you want. - Look where that's got me! 481 00:27:47,640 --> 00:27:49,596 GUARD: Move back or we will fire. 482 00:27:50,360 --> 00:27:51,998 Let's have that drink, huh? 483 00:27:55,600 --> 00:27:57,477 - Kate? - Oh, for... 484 00:27:57,560 --> 00:27:59,357 Can you just shut up about Kate? Kate, Kate! 485 00:27:59,440 --> 00:28:02,671 - All you ever talk about... - Kate. What's she doing here? 486 00:28:08,080 --> 00:28:10,719 - Kate! - Danny, is that you? 487 00:28:10,800 --> 00:28:11,994 You look... different. 488 00:28:16,560 --> 00:28:18,516 - Nope, not mine. - Whoa, whoa! 489 00:28:19,560 --> 00:28:21,915 You're the Kate from outside The Cat's Tail. 490 00:28:22,000 --> 00:28:24,958 - You kneed me in the balls. - Ooh, you're that Danny. 491 00:28:25,040 --> 00:28:27,076 Yeah. Dangerous Dan. 492 00:28:27,160 --> 00:28:30,197 Well... sorry. Excuse me. 493 00:28:30,280 --> 00:28:32,794 No, no. What are you doing? 494 00:28:32,880 --> 00:28:36,190 Just looking for my Milo and Danny and getting nowhere as usual. 495 00:28:36,280 --> 00:28:38,236 You look amazing in leather. 496 00:28:39,600 --> 00:28:42,876 - What are you doing? - Pretty much whatever I want. 497 00:28:42,960 --> 00:28:44,951 It's awesome, you should try it. 498 00:28:46,520 --> 00:28:47,873 - Stop it! - You started it! 499 00:28:47,960 --> 00:28:51,714 Look, now that you're here, there's probably something you should know... 500 00:29:01,280 --> 00:29:02,998 Fuck it, it's been ages. 501 00:29:03,920 --> 00:29:05,751 (Jeering and yelling) 502 00:29:05,840 --> 00:29:08,479 TANNOY: Move back from the fence! 503 00:29:08,560 --> 00:29:10,994 This is private property! 504 00:29:11,560 --> 00:29:15,348 NEWSREADER: on a scale never seen before in the history of mankind. 505 00:29:15,440 --> 00:29:20,116 They have wiped out huge cities across the world since the war began. 506 00:29:20,200 --> 00:29:23,272 Millions, if not billions, are already thought to be dead 507 00:29:23,360 --> 00:29:25,715 and martial law has been declared across the UK. 508 00:29:26,800 --> 00:29:30,190 In his last words before entering the Downing Street shelter, 509 00:29:30,280 --> 00:29:32,430 the Prime Minister issued a statement. 510 00:29:43,720 --> 00:29:45,199 Where have you been? 511 00:29:45,280 --> 00:29:47,510 New York and Paris were blown to shit overnight. 512 00:29:47,600 --> 00:29:50,273 - Jesus Christ. - Yeah. And we're next. 513 00:29:50,360 --> 00:29:52,316 Wait, we're not dead yet. 514 00:29:54,080 --> 00:29:56,036 We're not dead yet, which means... 515 00:29:57,800 --> 00:30:00,394 ...I cheated on Kate twice. 516 00:30:00,480 --> 00:30:01,799 Twice? 517 00:30:01,880 --> 00:30:05,793 Once with this Kate and then another time with... 518 00:30:05,880 --> 00:30:07,199 another Kate. 519 00:30:07,280 --> 00:30:09,157 You cheated on Kate with two Other Kates? 520 00:30:09,240 --> 00:30:10,832 You really have a type, don't you? 521 00:30:10,920 --> 00:30:14,230 It was the one with the sword. I didn't even try to get the wristband off of her. 522 00:30:14,320 --> 00:30:16,959 Bloody Dangerous Dan! 523 00:30:17,040 --> 00:30:18,996 (Man wailing) 524 00:30:25,160 --> 00:30:27,116 (Sobbing) 525 00:30:28,480 --> 00:30:30,152 No! 526 00:30:30,240 --> 00:30:32,196 Fucking Paul. 527 00:30:33,920 --> 00:30:36,388 You're here! But inside there, you're dead. 528 00:30:36,480 --> 00:30:40,109 - Paul, calm down. It's OK. - It's not OK! No, no, no! 529 00:30:40,200 --> 00:30:43,431 I came over to pick up your Friends and Family Pass 530 00:30:43,520 --> 00:30:45,795 to The Chair for us, but you weren't here. 531 00:30:45,880 --> 00:30:49,236 So I thought, "Sod this. Paolo is not going out like that." 532 00:30:49,320 --> 00:30:52,039 So I broke in... sorry about that. 533 00:30:52,120 --> 00:30:53,553 - That's all right. - It's OK. 534 00:30:53,640 --> 00:30:56,108 I looked around for the pass and I couldn't see it... 535 00:30:56,200 --> 00:30:58,111 - It's OK. - And I... 536 00:30:59,880 --> 00:31:01,233 - Ooh... - Jesus, Milo! 537 00:31:01,320 --> 00:31:03,993 Yeah, sorry, but he was doing my head in, so... 538 00:31:04,080 --> 00:31:07,356 We haven't got time to waste. We've got the documents to find. 539 00:31:07,440 --> 00:31:10,830 If I had a pass to The Chair, where would I keep it? 540 00:31:14,360 --> 00:31:16,316 Those passes have to be here somewhere. 541 00:31:23,400 --> 00:31:25,356 This photo was taken the day I proposed. 542 00:31:29,920 --> 00:31:33,037 "The place we nicked the halogen lights from." Same clue as before. 543 00:31:33,120 --> 00:31:35,031 Someone really wants us to get into that school. 544 00:31:38,920 --> 00:31:40,876 - And now we can. - (Both whoop) 545 00:31:41,800 --> 00:31:43,233 Yeah, man! 546 00:31:43,320 --> 00:31:45,914 And... I'm just gonna leave one for Kate, you know? 547 00:31:46,000 --> 00:31:49,879 - It's what the Other Me would have wanted. - Yeah. Just quickly, yeah? 548 00:31:53,240 --> 00:31:57,472 I'm so confused. I thought Danny from here was Dangerous Dan, like Kate is, you know? 549 00:31:57,560 --> 00:31:59,949 "Live for the moment." So why has he got insurance? 550 00:32:00,040 --> 00:32:05,160 Because, Danny boy, deep down you are just a sensible, insurance-loving bastard! 551 00:32:09,160 --> 00:32:11,116 (Yelling and jeering) 552 00:32:11,200 --> 00:32:14,033 This is definitely what you need when you're hungover. 553 00:32:15,440 --> 00:32:17,396 Excuse me. Sorry. Excuse me... 554 00:32:18,080 --> 00:32:20,469 - Hey, solidarity, my brother! - Good to see you. 555 00:32:21,840 --> 00:32:23,432 They can't keep us out, eh? 556 00:32:23,520 --> 00:32:25,954 - Power to the people! - Yeah. 557 00:32:26,040 --> 00:32:27,996 Two, please. 558 00:32:28,080 --> 00:32:30,833 (Chanting) Take back what's ours! Take back what's ours! 559 00:32:30,920 --> 00:32:34,151 - (Buzzer) - Take back what's ours! Take back what's ours! 560 00:32:34,480 --> 00:32:36,152 - Hey! - (Angry yelling) 561 00:32:39,400 --> 00:32:41,595 You bourgeois bastards! 562 00:32:52,120 --> 00:32:53,872 (Classical music) 563 00:32:53,960 --> 00:32:56,190 The old kitchens were round to the left. 564 00:32:56,280 --> 00:32:59,192 - Perfect. - Mr Gates, Mr Edwards. 565 00:32:59,280 --> 00:33:01,191 Your credentials have been verified. 566 00:33:01,280 --> 00:33:03,077 If you'd like to take the elevator. 567 00:33:03,160 --> 00:33:05,720 You don't remember me, do you? 568 00:33:05,800 --> 00:33:09,031 Hang on, Stacey Flatley? Oh, my God! 569 00:33:09,120 --> 00:33:12,317 Ah! You look amazing. Your hair's blonde now. 570 00:33:12,400 --> 00:33:15,358 That's... a thing, isn't it? Last time I saw you, I was... 571 00:33:15,440 --> 00:33:17,237 - Fingering me up a tree. - That's it. 572 00:33:17,320 --> 00:33:19,515 To be young again. We were gonna go this way, so... 573 00:33:19,600 --> 00:33:22,512 Er... the bunker's one mile underground, so... 574 00:33:22,600 --> 00:33:24,477 Oh, we were just going for a look around. 575 00:33:24,560 --> 00:33:28,155 The old school building is now used as The Chair corporate offices. 576 00:33:28,240 --> 00:33:32,028 - You can't get in without a keycard. - Like yours... 577 00:33:32,120 --> 00:33:36,079 There's really nothing exciting in there, to be honest. 578 00:33:36,160 --> 00:33:38,469 Thank you for choosing The Chair. 579 00:33:39,560 --> 00:33:42,836 And er... I'm glad to see you in here, Milo. 580 00:33:42,920 --> 00:33:45,354 - You look good. - You look good, too. 581 00:33:49,840 --> 00:33:53,196 Sorted! All we need is that keycard from Stacey and we are outta here. 582 00:33:53,280 --> 00:33:54,759 How do you plan on getting that? 583 00:33:54,840 --> 00:33:58,276 We are one classic Milo seduction away from getting the hell out of Crazy Town. 584 00:33:58,360 --> 00:34:00,954 Need to go downstairs, do my hair, get my game face on 585 00:34:01,040 --> 00:34:04,828 and, I'll be honest, take a shit, and then I'm coming right back up here. 586 00:34:04,920 --> 00:34:09,038 Cheer up. Hard to believe my life depends on copping off with Stacey Flatley. 587 00:34:09,120 --> 00:34:10,599 Lucky you. 588 00:34:15,680 --> 00:34:17,636 Ah, welcome to The Chair. 589 00:34:17,720 --> 00:34:19,517 Please, follow me. 590 00:34:22,200 --> 00:34:24,430 It is never as good as the brochure, is it? 591 00:34:24,520 --> 00:34:26,511 As long as it's nuke-proof, who gives a shit? 592 00:34:31,560 --> 00:34:34,836 Your pod. Please call if we can be of any assistance. 593 00:34:36,280 --> 00:34:37,838 Thank you. 594 00:34:43,800 --> 00:34:45,518 I'm going to use the facilities. 595 00:34:45,600 --> 00:34:47,670 - I feel terrible. - Hm? 596 00:34:48,720 --> 00:34:51,757 This world's Danny is dead and the things I did with his Kate... 597 00:34:51,840 --> 00:34:53,159 Can this wait? Cos I've... 598 00:34:53,240 --> 00:34:57,313 I was gonna get married, live happily ever after and... 599 00:34:57,400 --> 00:35:01,678 I feel your pain, but I really, really need to poo, so... 600 00:35:12,680 --> 00:35:13,954 Your pod. 601 00:35:14,840 --> 00:35:17,593 Kate, you made it. You must have been right behind us. 602 00:35:17,680 --> 00:35:18,795 What? 603 00:35:18,880 --> 00:35:23,715 I can't believe that you secretly spent a fuck-ton of money on private shelter insurance. 604 00:35:23,800 --> 00:35:25,631 You should have just told me. 605 00:35:27,280 --> 00:35:31,273 Maybe I thought you wanted me to be all crazy and spontaneous. 606 00:35:31,360 --> 00:35:33,749 There's so many people up there, innocent people, 607 00:35:33,840 --> 00:35:37,879 - while we're down here... - I know it's not right... but at least we're safe. 608 00:35:37,960 --> 00:35:40,918 I have to find my parents... my friends. 609 00:35:41,000 --> 00:35:42,353 I can't be here. 610 00:35:42,440 --> 00:35:45,637 You can join me if you want, but I'm not staying. 611 00:35:45,720 --> 00:35:47,278 Hey, hey, hey. Look, look, look. 612 00:35:47,360 --> 00:35:51,433 I know it's hard, OK? But you can't die, I won't let you. 613 00:35:51,520 --> 00:35:54,034 The moment has passed, it's gone back in. Hello, Kate. 614 00:35:54,120 --> 00:35:56,953 Let's go. Operation Flatley... begins now. 615 00:35:57,040 --> 00:35:59,031 - Give me a minute, OK? - Let go of me, Danny! 616 00:35:59,120 --> 00:36:00,633 Kate wants to go up to the surface. 617 00:36:00,720 --> 00:36:02,631 Highly not recommended. Dan, let's go. 618 00:36:02,720 --> 00:36:04,711 - Let me go! - Calm down, OK? Calm down! 619 00:36:04,800 --> 00:36:07,951 - Guys, we do not have time for this. - I'll catch up, OK? 620 00:36:08,920 --> 00:36:10,353 (Angry yelling) 621 00:36:16,880 --> 00:36:18,359 Stacey... 622 00:36:19,640 --> 00:36:24,509 I was just downstairs chilling out and er... it got me thinking. 623 00:36:24,600 --> 00:36:26,830 - Me, too. - OK. 624 00:36:26,920 --> 00:36:28,592 (Angry shouting from outside) 625 00:36:32,920 --> 00:36:38,233 Let's take this somewhere a little less filled with the sound of rioting, huh? 626 00:36:40,880 --> 00:36:43,155 Look at them! Corporate bloodsuckers! 627 00:36:43,240 --> 00:36:45,196 Staying safe and leaving us to burn. 628 00:36:45,280 --> 00:36:46,429 String him up! 629 00:36:49,240 --> 00:36:50,468 (Screams) 630 00:36:53,080 --> 00:36:55,036 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa... 631 00:36:56,200 --> 00:36:57,599 (Grunts) 632 00:36:58,440 --> 00:37:00,192 Me! Me! 633 00:37:00,280 --> 00:37:02,236 Oh, yeah! 634 00:37:04,320 --> 00:37:08,074 And you. You're the Danny who appeared in my house and gave us the wristband. 635 00:37:08,160 --> 00:37:10,515 - This door won't hold for long. - Oh, what is going on? 636 00:37:10,600 --> 00:37:12,238 Where's the other Danny? 637 00:37:12,320 --> 00:37:16,154 Back in the bunker. Kate was freaking out and Danny made it his problem like always. 638 00:37:16,240 --> 00:37:19,073 - It's always about Kate; BOTH: You're just like me! 639 00:37:19,160 --> 00:37:21,833 - No shit, Sherlock. - We need to find Danny, so... 640 00:37:21,920 --> 00:37:24,593 - Follow us. - No, no, no. Not until I know what's going on. 641 00:37:24,680 --> 00:37:27,638 Since you guys rocked up into my life, it's been one massive shit sandwich. 642 00:37:27,720 --> 00:37:30,678 - A double decker shit sandwich. - While we talk, we move. 643 00:37:30,760 --> 00:37:32,273 OK, how did you know we were here? 644 00:37:32,360 --> 00:37:35,113 You're following the clues. Stacey, the halogen lights, that's us. 645 00:37:35,200 --> 00:37:38,670 Why are you helping me and Dan? Why did you come and see me and say I was special? 646 00:37:38,760 --> 00:37:42,992 There's someone trying to kill me and him by wiping out every Milo and Danny in existence. 647 00:37:43,080 --> 00:37:45,036 - But why? - Bad luck. 648 00:37:45,120 --> 00:37:48,954 Back in our world, we broke into a house that we thought was empty to get stoned. 649 00:37:49,040 --> 00:37:51,315 - Classic us. - Only it wasn't empty. 650 00:37:51,400 --> 00:37:54,790 It was filled with all this weird shit - gadgets, screens. 651 00:37:54,880 --> 00:37:57,792 When we were looking around, Callum came in. 652 00:37:57,880 --> 00:38:00,474 Starts threatening us, telling us he's going to kill us. 653 00:38:00,560 --> 00:38:02,198 In the shit-yourself panic, 654 00:38:02,280 --> 00:38:05,989 we grabbed some wristbands, pressed some buttons, ended up somewhere else. 655 00:38:06,080 --> 00:38:09,038 So use your wristbands. Get us out of here, then. No? 656 00:38:09,120 --> 00:38:10,712 If we use them, Callum can track us. 657 00:38:10,800 --> 00:38:13,314 If we're gonna get you home, we need you to use the gateway. 658 00:38:13,400 --> 00:38:17,598 He can't get through the gateways. And it takes a really long time to track where they went. 659 00:38:18,280 --> 00:38:20,236 Home? You're gonna take me home? 660 00:38:20,320 --> 00:38:22,276 Come on. 661 00:38:28,200 --> 00:38:30,156 You all right now? 662 00:38:30,240 --> 00:38:31,958 You OK? 663 00:38:32,040 --> 00:38:35,749 - Yeah, I'm sorry. I just lost it. - I don't blame you. 664 00:38:35,840 --> 00:38:39,196 Now... I know this is gonna sound a bit weird, 665 00:38:39,280 --> 00:38:42,317 but I... I actually have to go somewhere myself. 666 00:38:42,400 --> 00:38:43,549 What? 667 00:38:45,160 --> 00:38:46,354 What the hell is that? 668 00:38:49,800 --> 00:38:50,949 TV: Breaking news... 669 00:38:53,680 --> 00:38:55,432 And what about Kate? 670 00:38:55,520 --> 00:38:59,035 She was with us when we stole the wristbands. It was the three of us for a while. 671 00:38:59,120 --> 00:39:03,671 Trying to stay alive, then... we got separated and we've been trying to find her ever since. 672 00:39:03,760 --> 00:39:06,911 She's been trying to find you, too. Yeah, that makes sense. 673 00:39:07,000 --> 00:39:09,719 We've been trying to help every version of us we find. 674 00:39:09,800 --> 00:39:12,394 Why not just fucking tell us all this in the first place? 675 00:39:12,480 --> 00:39:14,835 I did. I told you the night I came to you. 676 00:39:14,920 --> 00:39:16,990 I was very high at the time. 677 00:39:17,080 --> 00:39:19,514 - Classic us, though. - That's what I was gonna say. 678 00:39:19,600 --> 00:39:22,433 What about these gateways? Where did they come from? 679 00:39:22,520 --> 00:39:24,875 - What about the wristbands? - They're a safety net. 680 00:39:24,960 --> 00:39:27,269 - (Angry shouting intensifies) - Up on the table. 681 00:39:28,600 --> 00:39:31,433 What, this is the gateway? Oh, OK. 682 00:39:31,520 --> 00:39:35,195 I thought we were gonna find Danny for some super-secret back way. 683 00:39:35,280 --> 00:39:37,555 We'll go back for Danny. But not until you're safe. 684 00:39:37,640 --> 00:39:41,428 No. I don't even know why this is happening, why you're helping. 685 00:39:41,520 --> 00:39:43,636 No time to explain, Milo. You have to go. 686 00:39:43,720 --> 00:39:45,199 That jacket. Little bit messed up. 687 00:39:45,280 --> 00:39:47,510 - Yeah. - Here. Take this one. 688 00:39:47,600 --> 00:39:49,272 Sweet. 689 00:39:49,360 --> 00:39:51,112 A little something to remember us by. 690 00:39:51,200 --> 00:39:53,156 Thanks, man. 691 00:40:01,440 --> 00:40:03,590 Run! Run! Run for your lives! 692 00:40:03,680 --> 00:40:05,511 They've broken in! They'll kill us all! 693 00:40:06,760 --> 00:40:08,716 Oh, my God. 694 00:40:08,800 --> 00:40:13,157 The news says that the police helping guard outside have turned on Goldenmire. 695 00:40:13,240 --> 00:40:15,595 They're helping the crowd shoot their way in. 696 00:40:15,680 --> 00:40:17,591 Every pissed-off person left up there to die 697 00:40:17,680 --> 00:40:20,831 is coming down here for revenge on the selfish pricks inside. 698 00:40:22,440 --> 00:40:23,919 On us. 699 00:40:24,520 --> 00:40:26,829 - We're gonna be OK. I'll... - (Shattering glass) 700 00:40:27,640 --> 00:40:29,790 - (Angry yelling) - Go, go, go! 701 00:40:33,720 --> 00:40:35,438 They're through. Go, Milo. Go. 702 00:40:35,520 --> 00:40:38,830 - No! I'm not going anywhere without Danny. - There is no time. Come on! 703 00:40:38,920 --> 00:40:41,275 You said you'd go get him, so go and get him. 704 00:40:46,560 --> 00:40:48,676 It's now or never. They're getting closer. 705 00:40:49,760 --> 00:40:51,796 He chose to stay behind with Kate. 706 00:40:51,880 --> 00:40:55,475 He was willing to die for that choice. Are you? 707 00:40:57,360 --> 00:41:01,717 It's gonna be fine. We're gonna be OK. We're gonna be absolutely, completely fine. 708 00:41:03,560 --> 00:41:04,788 Come on! 709 00:41:07,200 --> 00:41:08,428 Ooh, no... 710 00:41:13,520 --> 00:41:15,476 No! I'm not going... 711 00:41:18,500 --> 00:41:26,500 Ripped By mstoll