1
00:00:01,134 --> 00:00:03,227
Ders, I am the better beat boxer.
2
00:00:03,403 --> 00:00:06,497
Blake, your beat box is a weak box.
3
00:00:06,840 --> 00:00:09,365
Oh, Blake,
4
00:00:09,642 --> 00:00:11,473
you going to let him talk to you like that?
5
00:00:11,578 --> 00:00:13,876
You better battle back.
6
00:00:14,014 --> 00:00:15,174
- Yeah.
- Now?
7
00:00:15,248 --> 00:00:16,545
- Yep.
- No, no. Not now.
8
00:00:16,616 --> 00:00:17,981
- I mean, I have to, like, warm up.
- Okay? See?
9
00:00:18,051 --> 00:00:19,040
- I would need hot tea.
- Oh.
10
00:00:19,119 --> 00:00:21,246
- It's just a whole process.
- Beat box, Blake!
11
00:00:21,321 --> 00:00:23,915
- Let's go.
- Okay, just let me put the record on.
12
00:00:37,237 --> 00:00:38,602
Ho, ho, ho!
13
00:00:39,372 --> 00:00:41,340
Ders, is it too hot to handle?
14
00:00:41,408 --> 00:00:42,466
Hit us with it.
15
00:00:42,542 --> 00:00:43,941
- All right, here we go, here we go.
- Okay.
16
00:00:45,645 --> 00:00:48,375
Well, I'm about to turn in, kids.
What are you going to do?
17
00:00:48,448 --> 00:00:49,779
We're going to party, Daddy!
18
00:00:51,284 --> 00:00:52,615
Party, Daddy.
19
00:00:52,719 --> 00:00:55,517
Party, Daddy.
20
00:00:59,893 --> 00:01:01,451
Whoo! Whoo!
21
00:01:01,628 --> 00:01:04,461
It's too hot in here. Blake, hit 'em with it!
22
00:01:04,531 --> 00:01:05,555
Okay.
23
00:01:26,686 --> 00:01:29,985
Oh, oh, that was goddamn loony tunes.
24
00:01:30,056 --> 00:01:31,648
Adam, we're not that good.
25
00:01:31,700 --> 00:01:35,000
Ripped & Corrected By mstoll
26
00:01:35,195 --> 00:01:36,685
I'm fresh
27
00:01:38,298 --> 00:01:40,232
You gotta, you gotta
You gotta, gotta
28
00:01:40,300 --> 00:01:41,767
Got to be fresh
29
00:01:44,104 --> 00:01:46,538
- Mmm. It's a real gummy meat.
- Yeah.
30
00:01:46,639 --> 00:01:49,631
I don't like it when the meat
stops being chewy, right?
31
00:01:49,709 --> 00:01:51,301
Because then you get a longer meal.
32
00:01:51,377 --> 00:01:52,708
Because you're chewing.
You don't just swallow.
33
00:01:52,779 --> 00:01:55,179
- Right.
- Yeah. You get more bite for your buck.
34
00:01:55,248 --> 00:01:57,648
It's almost like eating
a wet paper towel in a way.
35
00:01:57,717 --> 00:01:58,843
- Oh.
- Mmm-hmm.
36
00:01:58,918 --> 00:02:00,317
All I know, fellas, is...
37
00:02:00,386 --> 00:02:04,049
I love Yoshinoya bowls
38
00:02:04,124 --> 00:02:06,149
- Yeah, I mean they're good.
- Great song.
39
00:02:06,226 --> 00:02:08,217
Thanks, man. I want to pitch it to the...
40
00:02:08,294 --> 00:02:09,420
What's up, brothers?
41
00:02:09,629 --> 00:02:10,960
- Mmm.
- Hey.
42
00:02:11,731 --> 00:02:12,720
It's Cushing.
43
00:02:14,000 --> 00:02:15,763
Cushing Ward.
We used to work here together.
44
00:02:16,202 --> 00:02:17,396
Oh, yeah.
45
00:02:17,470 --> 00:02:19,301
- Oh. What's up, dude?
- Wow.
46
00:02:19,372 --> 00:02:20,839
- I mean, I didn't recognize you.
- Yeah.
47
00:02:20,907 --> 00:02:22,670
- You've lost a lot of weight, and your...
- Mmm-hmm.
48
00:02:22,742 --> 00:02:24,710
Your skin looks fantastic. It's so shiny.
49
00:02:24,777 --> 00:02:26,404
- You used to look horrible.
- Yeah.
50
00:02:26,513 --> 00:02:28,447
Yeah, well, I lost, like, 70 pounds,
51
00:02:28,515 --> 00:02:31,109
started using essential oils,
two, four, seven, three, six, five.
52
00:02:31,184 --> 00:02:32,173
- Sure.
- That's cool.
53
00:02:32,252 --> 00:02:35,653
I can relate because
I recently lost four pounds
54
00:02:35,755 --> 00:02:38,781
and started using a loofah
with Old Spice swagger.
55
00:02:38,858 --> 00:02:40,325
- Mmm-hmm.
- So, we're like the same dude.
56
00:02:40,393 --> 00:02:42,224
Yeah, totally. Totally, man.
57
00:02:42,295 --> 00:02:44,923
So what's the deal? I'm getting, like,
a real Ballers vibe from you, man.
58
00:02:44,998 --> 00:02:46,829
You working with athletes?
Is that what that is?
59
00:02:46,900 --> 00:02:48,492
No, I'm still doing telemarketing for TAC.
60
00:02:48,568 --> 00:02:49,830
Work at the Van Nuys branch.
61
00:02:50,403 --> 00:02:52,428
- Just dropped something off for Alice.
- What?
62
00:02:52,939 --> 00:02:55,100
You're a telemarketer
and you drive a Porsche?
63
00:02:55,308 --> 00:02:56,639
No, you a coke dealer.
64
00:02:56,709 --> 00:02:58,233
That's how you got so skinny, huh?
65
00:02:58,311 --> 00:03:02,111
No, no, no, no, no. Still working at Van Nuys.
Just a whole different world over there.
66
00:03:02,182 --> 00:03:03,171
Huh.
67
00:03:03,283 --> 00:03:07,447
Guy that runs the place, JP,
is just a real leader.
68
00:03:07,520 --> 00:03:08,509
Yeah.
69
00:03:08,588 --> 00:03:11,523
If it wasn't for him, I'd probably
still be living with a bunch of dudes...
70
00:03:11,591 --> 00:03:13,149
- Smoking weed all day...
- Yeah.
71
00:03:13,226 --> 00:03:14,853
Eating Yoshinoya,
72
00:03:15,128 --> 00:03:17,790
driving my old shitty car, not this car.
73
00:03:17,864 --> 00:03:19,297
Yeah, I'm with you, man.
74
00:03:19,766 --> 00:03:22,234
I drive that Range Rover. That's mine.
That's what I drive.
75
00:03:22,302 --> 00:03:23,326
I own that car.
76
00:03:23,403 --> 00:03:24,700
- Yep.
- So...
77
00:03:24,771 --> 00:03:27,239
- It's driving away, your car.
- Ah, okay, so...
78
00:03:27,307 --> 00:03:29,070
That lady's probably
taking it for a wash, you know?
79
00:03:29,142 --> 00:03:30,131
- I'll see you around?
- Yeah.
80
00:03:30,210 --> 00:03:31,438
Be sure and wax it.
81
00:03:31,678 --> 00:03:33,202
Hi, Alice. Question.
82
00:03:33,313 --> 00:03:35,144
Do you have any idea
how much time we waste here
83
00:03:35,215 --> 00:03:37,149
doing dumb-ass beat box competitions?
84
00:03:37,217 --> 00:03:38,206
She probably doesn't.
85
00:03:38,284 --> 00:03:40,809
Do you even know how
many naps we've taken today?
86
00:03:40,887 --> 00:03:42,354
I'll tell you, Alice. Three.
87
00:03:42,422 --> 00:03:44,822
And as far as I'm concerned,
that's one too many.
88
00:03:44,924 --> 00:03:47,552
Okay, I don't know what this is about,
but I do not have time, okay?
89
00:03:47,627 --> 00:03:49,322
I have a very big presentation coming up.
90
00:03:49,395 --> 00:03:50,919
And there it is right there.
91
00:03:51,030 --> 00:03:54,295
Everything that's wrong
with you as a so-called leader.
92
00:03:54,367 --> 00:03:55,459
- Yeah.
- See that? It was in quotes.
93
00:03:55,535 --> 00:03:58,197
Yeah, and that is why we're so-called losers,
94
00:03:58,271 --> 00:04:00,068
because you don't lead us good, okay?
95
00:04:00,173 --> 00:04:01,834
I'm an idiot 'cause you're a bozo.
96
00:04:01,908 --> 00:04:04,274
- Deep down, I'm a great man.
- Yeah.
97
00:04:04,344 --> 00:04:07,802
And a true pimp playboy for real.
But you're don't inspire that out of us.
98
00:04:07,880 --> 00:04:10,610
In fact, you're always yelling at us,
acting like a total bitch.
99
00:04:10,683 --> 00:04:11,672
Yeah.
100
00:04:11,784 --> 00:04:13,115
Excuse me?
101
00:04:13,186 --> 00:04:14,414
I was, um...
102
00:04:15,054 --> 00:04:16,578
Acting, he said.
103
00:04:16,656 --> 00:04:17,918
- Acting like a bitch.
- I did say, acting.
104
00:04:17,991 --> 00:04:20,357
- We're not calling you a bitch.
- Yeah.
105
00:04:20,426 --> 00:04:24,055
We're saying that things
you do are that of a bitch.
106
00:04:24,130 --> 00:04:26,462
Right, you have bitch-ish ways about you.
107
00:04:26,532 --> 00:04:27,999
- Bitch-ishness.
- Yeah, bitchy, bitchy.
108
00:04:28,067 --> 00:04:29,796
- Yeah, just a little bit. Act. Acting.
- Yeah.
109
00:04:29,869 --> 00:04:32,099
Okay, that is it. Everybody out now.
110
00:04:32,171 --> 00:04:33,502
That's kind of what we're talking about.
111
00:04:33,573 --> 00:04:34,767
Unless you want to be fired.
112
00:04:34,841 --> 00:04:38,675
No, but how about
a transfer to TAC-Van Nuys?
113
00:04:38,745 --> 00:04:42,237
Yeah, because the boss
there is a true leader, unlike you.
114
00:04:42,348 --> 00:04:46,375
And he's going to inspire us to be great men
and true playboy pimps, for real.
115
00:04:46,452 --> 00:04:50,650
Okay, so I no longer have to waste
valuable time on stupid shit like this?
116
00:04:50,723 --> 00:04:51,712
That's right.
117
00:04:51,791 --> 00:04:52,883
Consider it done.
118
00:04:52,959 --> 00:04:54,756
- You'll start there tomorrow.
- Okay.
119
00:04:54,827 --> 00:04:57,421
Well, now that we're not working together,
120
00:04:57,497 --> 00:04:59,556
I was hoping that me and you could...
121
00:05:02,602 --> 00:05:03,830
Hello?
122
00:05:04,570 --> 00:05:06,265
Are you sure this is it?
123
00:05:19,719 --> 00:05:20,879
Hello?
124
00:05:20,987 --> 00:05:22,454
Sell me.
125
00:05:22,789 --> 00:05:24,381
Uh, okay, sell you what?
126
00:05:24,457 --> 00:05:26,425
Sell me on each other.
127
00:05:26,492 --> 00:05:29,655
Sell me on why you deserve to work here.
128
00:05:30,196 --> 00:05:30,958
Well, hi.
129
00:05:31,698 --> 00:05:33,791
You're here with a guy
name Blake Henderson.
130
00:05:33,866 --> 00:05:35,197
This guy's good. He could...
131
00:05:35,435 --> 00:05:38,836
He could sell sand to Sandra Bullock,
132
00:05:39,072 --> 00:05:40,664
who probably doesn't need sand.
133
00:05:40,740 --> 00:05:42,401
She's probably got
a beach house in Malibu, right?
134
00:05:42,475 --> 00:05:45,967
And if you don't hire him,
you're going to regret it for your whole life,
135
00:05:46,045 --> 00:05:49,014
and you'll probably end up
dying of regret cancer,
136
00:05:49,082 --> 00:05:51,050
which is a real thing, my aunt died from it.
137
00:05:51,117 --> 00:05:52,482
She regretted smoking her whole life.
138
00:05:52,552 --> 00:05:55,715
Yeah, yeah. My good friend,
Adam "The Money Boy" DeMamp,
139
00:05:55,788 --> 00:05:58,222
is a sales shark. He's a hammerhead.
140
00:05:58,291 --> 00:06:00,725
Oh, no, more like a phone-head shark,
141
00:06:00,793 --> 00:06:04,024
because this dude it's basically like
he has a phone attached to his head,
142
00:06:04,097 --> 00:06:05,894
and he's circling those sales.
143
00:06:05,965 --> 00:06:09,264
But actually, I want to move
the spotlight over to my dude
144
00:06:09,335 --> 00:06:10,859
Anders Holmvik, okay?
145
00:06:10,937 --> 00:06:12,768
And I want to move the spotlight back to me
146
00:06:12,839 --> 00:06:14,704
because I didn't like that last one.
147
00:06:14,774 --> 00:06:17,106
- So let's just do a couple more on me.
- Okay, I'll get back to you...
148
00:06:17,176 --> 00:06:19,371
Stop. I've made my decision.
149
00:06:19,712 --> 00:06:22,078
And, boys, I'm buying what you're selling.
150
00:06:22,148 --> 00:06:23,274
All right.
151
00:06:28,154 --> 00:06:29,519
Yeah. Right on.
152
00:06:36,062 --> 00:06:39,429
You've got one week
to prove that you belong here permanently.
153
00:06:40,266 --> 00:06:42,598
Congrats, boys. Welcome to TAC-Van Nuys,
154
00:06:43,202 --> 00:06:44,965
or as JP here likes to call it...
155
00:06:45,371 --> 00:06:47,669
The mother... dough-jo.
156
00:06:47,807 --> 00:06:49,502
Dough-jo.
Dough-jo. Dough-jo.
157
00:06:49,609 --> 00:06:54,637
Now, who here wants a Carl's Jr. Sausage,
egg, and cheese biscuit coupon?
158
00:06:56,816 --> 00:06:57,874
- That's mine!
- I caught one.
159
00:06:57,950 --> 00:07:00,145
Oh, wow. Gorgeous photos.
160
00:07:00,219 --> 00:07:01,481
Herb Ritts shoot these?
161
00:07:01,554 --> 00:07:03,886
No, my boy Juan Carlos took these.
162
00:07:03,956 --> 00:07:05,446
Crazy talented.
163
00:07:05,625 --> 00:07:07,718
Shot Brooke Burke for
the cover of Stuff magazine.
164
00:07:07,794 --> 00:07:09,819
- Wow.
- I love Stuff magazine.
165
00:07:09,896 --> 00:07:11,761
Hey, whoa. You can't go in there.
166
00:07:12,098 --> 00:07:13,656
That leads to JP's office.
167
00:07:13,966 --> 00:07:16,127
It's off-limits, except for VIPs.
168
00:07:16,436 --> 00:07:17,960
- VIPs.
- VIPs.
169
00:07:18,171 --> 00:07:20,537
And these are going to be your offices.
170
00:07:20,673 --> 00:07:22,038
Wait. We get our own offices?
171
00:07:22,108 --> 00:07:23,837
TAC-Van Nuys, baby.
172
00:07:23,943 --> 00:07:25,467
Just call down to Shannon,
the office manager.
173
00:07:25,545 --> 00:07:28,105
Let her know what decor you prefer,
and she'll make it happen.
174
00:07:28,281 --> 00:07:29,612
I love decor.
175
00:07:29,682 --> 00:07:32,378
- Yeah!
- All right. Look, my name.
176
00:07:32,452 --> 00:07:36,479
You'll also find new suits as well as the hair
gel and essential oils that JP recommends.
177
00:07:36,556 --> 00:07:38,581
Get changed. JP's blasting
off a speech in 10.
178
00:07:38,658 --> 00:07:40,216
- Be there!
- Okay!
179
00:07:40,593 --> 00:07:42,117
So here's what we're going to do.
180
00:07:42,195 --> 00:07:43,389
We're going to take this week.
181
00:07:43,629 --> 00:07:47,224
We're going to butt... it until
it dumps Monday!
182
00:07:48,367 --> 00:07:49,561
...yes!
183
00:07:49,669 --> 00:07:50,863
- Yes!
...yes!
184
00:07:50,937 --> 00:07:52,837
- Yes! Whoo!
...yes!
185
00:07:52,905 --> 00:07:53,894
...yeah.
186
00:07:53,973 --> 00:07:55,998
If some old man says to you, "No,"
187
00:07:56,075 --> 00:07:57,235
because he's broke
188
00:07:57,310 --> 00:08:00,871
because he spent his money
on expensive heart medication,
189
00:08:00,947 --> 00:08:01,936
what does that mean?
190
00:08:02,048 --> 00:08:03,777
Yes.
191
00:08:04,317 --> 00:08:05,682
Because no means...
192
00:08:05,818 --> 00:08:07,115
Yes.
193
00:08:07,320 --> 00:08:08,651
I don't know what you're waiting for.
194
00:08:08,721 --> 00:08:10,882
- Go, go, go!
- Yeah!
195
00:08:10,957 --> 00:08:12,515
Sell these... things!
196
00:08:13,793 --> 00:08:15,624
He's insane
197
00:08:21,467 --> 00:08:22,525
Listen up.
198
00:08:23,302 --> 00:08:24,860
You crushed it.
199
00:08:24,937 --> 00:08:25,961
200 sales.
200
00:08:26,038 --> 00:08:27,062
- Yes!
- Okay!
201
00:08:27,139 --> 00:08:28,197
- Whoo!
- Yeah, that's right, man.
202
00:08:28,274 --> 00:08:29,263
Van Nuys!
203
00:08:29,575 --> 00:08:30,837
So here's the big surprise.
204
00:08:32,812 --> 00:08:35,246
I want 200 more sales by 8:00 tonight.
205
00:08:36,516 --> 00:08:37,778
What? Is he serious, dude?
206
00:08:37,884 --> 00:08:39,875
I'm, like, exhausted.
Now he wants us to work late?
207
00:08:39,952 --> 00:08:41,886
If you want to go home
and you want to rip farts
208
00:08:41,954 --> 00:08:44,514
and watch The Dome, the door is right there.
209
00:08:45,091 --> 00:08:47,116
But if you want to be a phone beast
210
00:08:47,360 --> 00:08:49,760
and you want to be rewarded,
that's right, rewarded.
211
00:08:49,829 --> 00:08:52,354
We're going to have Botox shots
flying around the office,
212
00:08:52,431 --> 00:08:55,730
as well as sushi strippers
for all you boys and girls.
213
00:08:58,037 --> 00:08:59,265
Whoo!
214
00:08:59,338 --> 00:09:00,999
Okay. All right.
215
00:09:01,173 --> 00:09:02,765
- It's like, Showdown in Little Tokyo.
- Yes.
216
00:09:02,842 --> 00:09:03,866
- Yes!
- Yeah. Heck, yeah.
217
00:09:03,943 --> 00:09:07,470
If you guys get to 200 sales,
400 total for tonight,
218
00:09:07,547 --> 00:09:10,675
you get to wease the juice
with the Wease-Man himself.
219
00:09:10,750 --> 00:09:13,981
- Oh! Oh, Pauly Shore!
- Oh, Pauly Shore!
220
00:09:14,120 --> 00:09:15,815
Oh, my God, man.
221
00:09:15,988 --> 00:09:17,649
Hello, TAC.
222
00:09:18,190 --> 00:09:19,714
Van Nuys guys.
223
00:09:20,026 --> 00:09:23,484
Who's ready to mother... party?
224
00:09:25,264 --> 00:09:26,754
Me. I am, Pauly.
225
00:09:26,832 --> 00:09:30,768
Me and Pauly are old friends,
and, uh, he lost a bet.
226
00:09:32,905 --> 00:09:35,874
- This makes us even, JP. You son of a bitch.
- Yeah.
227
00:09:35,942 --> 00:09:37,910
Well, if you guys start working the phones
228
00:09:37,977 --> 00:09:41,105
and you start making those sales,
guess what?
229
00:09:41,180 --> 00:09:43,239
I'll get you on TMZ tonight.
230
00:09:43,316 --> 00:09:44,305
- Yes!
- Yeah!
231
00:09:44,383 --> 00:09:45,372
- Go, go, go, go, go!
- Okay.
232
00:09:45,451 --> 00:09:47,385
- Yeah.
- Sell, sell, sell.
233
00:09:48,187 --> 00:09:49,950
- 200 more!
- Let's go.
234
00:09:50,323 --> 00:09:52,518
I wish I would have had some beers in here
235
00:09:52,592 --> 00:09:55,755
or maybe some sake bombs
or something or some of that sushi, man,
236
00:09:55,828 --> 00:09:57,819
or one of those hot little stripper bitches.
237
00:09:57,897 --> 00:09:59,194
Of course they're great for kids.
238
00:09:59,265 --> 00:10:01,859
How many do you want? 10? They're yours.
239
00:10:02,034 --> 00:10:03,433
I mean, the real question is,
240
00:10:03,502 --> 00:10:06,960
do you care about
the happiness of your children?
241
00:10:07,673 --> 00:10:09,106
And that's a yes!
242
00:10:09,175 --> 00:10:12,542
Whoo! Sold, baby!
243
00:10:12,979 --> 00:10:15,413
And just so you know,
with the purchase of this product,
244
00:10:15,481 --> 00:10:17,506
you do have a three-year warranty.
245
00:10:17,583 --> 00:10:19,346
Excellent. You have a nice day, too.
246
00:10:25,257 --> 00:10:27,817
Bam, yeah! I love it! Whoo!
247
00:10:29,395 --> 00:10:30,885
We be selling.
248
00:10:31,263 --> 00:10:33,163
I want you to be Sales Team Six!
249
00:10:33,399 --> 00:10:37,165
I want you to be samurai
telemarketing... warriors!
250
00:10:37,303 --> 00:10:39,965
I don't care if your... mom dies today!
251
00:10:40,873 --> 00:10:44,172
Okay. Ow, that was loud. I'm sorry.
I couldn't hear.
252
00:10:45,311 --> 00:10:46,335
Sold!
253
00:10:47,780 --> 00:10:49,748
I made a sale, girl.
254
00:10:50,049 --> 00:10:52,244
You got three kids. I say you buy three.
255
00:10:52,318 --> 00:10:54,411
Great. All right, take care.
256
00:10:54,487 --> 00:10:57,513
We got a sale!
257
00:10:57,757 --> 00:10:59,725
Sir, I'm afraid that's
the best offer I can get you.
258
00:10:59,792 --> 00:11:02,260
You know what? I'm going to put you
on hold and let you think about that.
259
00:11:02,328 --> 00:11:03,590
Wait, wait. Ho, ho.
260
00:11:03,663 --> 00:11:06,188
Ah, yep. How are you?
261
00:11:06,332 --> 00:11:10,860
I don't want to let go, but I have to
'cause I'm addicted to sales right now.
262
00:11:10,936 --> 00:11:13,268
You got 10 minutes till judgment day.
263
00:11:13,439 --> 00:11:15,407
Come on, let's move it.
264
00:11:16,909 --> 00:11:19,104
No thanks. Actually, hold on.
265
00:11:22,048 --> 00:11:23,037
Yeah.
266
00:11:23,249 --> 00:11:25,274
God damn.
267
00:11:28,821 --> 00:11:29,879
Hang up the phones.
268
00:11:30,589 --> 00:11:31,578
Hang 'em up.
269
00:11:34,727 --> 00:11:35,751
Feel good?
270
00:11:35,961 --> 00:11:36,950
Yeah.
271
00:11:37,163 --> 00:11:38,152
Are you sore?
272
00:11:38,698 --> 00:11:40,165
'Cause you should be sore.
273
00:11:41,100 --> 00:11:43,295
Because today just
butt... you up the ass!
274
00:11:43,369 --> 00:11:44,893
- Butt!
- Mmm.
275
00:11:45,771 --> 00:11:48,831
You're 27 units short of expectations.
276
00:11:49,008 --> 00:11:51,033
- You kidding me?
- Not good enough!
277
00:11:51,243 --> 00:11:54,610
That means that nobody gets
to wease the juice with Pauly!
278
00:11:54,680 --> 00:11:56,841
Well,
can we at least talk to him?
279
00:11:56,916 --> 00:11:57,905
No!
280
00:11:58,818 --> 00:12:00,615
Whoa, whoa. JP! JP!
281
00:12:00,886 --> 00:12:04,151
Well, you heard him. It's over. Go home.
282
00:12:04,223 --> 00:12:06,191
Don't leave me in here! I'm going to die!
283
00:12:06,258 --> 00:12:08,658
Ding dong, the Weasel's... dead.
284
00:12:08,894 --> 00:12:11,385
That means we might never
get to party with Pauly Shore
285
00:12:11,464 --> 00:12:12,863
and probably join his crew.
286
00:12:12,932 --> 00:12:15,457
Yeah, well, you know,
you heard what JP said.
287
00:12:16,335 --> 00:12:17,393
He said no.
288
00:12:17,803 --> 00:12:20,169
And you know what that means, right?
289
00:12:20,806 --> 00:12:21,795
Halt!
290
00:12:23,142 --> 00:12:24,973
What size are those crystal clappers?
291
00:12:26,045 --> 00:12:27,034
You're pretty good at that.
292
00:12:27,113 --> 00:12:29,707
Okay, stripper pole is secure.
293
00:12:29,782 --> 00:12:31,773
All right, hang in there, buddy.
294
00:12:31,851 --> 00:12:33,614
We're going to get you out real soon, okay?
295
00:12:33,686 --> 00:12:37,679
Pauly, I'm going to spin off this bar,
smash into the cage with my heels,
296
00:12:37,757 --> 00:12:39,156
and free your ass.
297
00:12:39,225 --> 00:12:40,624
- All right.
- You ready? Cool.
298
00:12:40,693 --> 00:12:42,092
- Yeah.
- Come on.
299
00:12:42,161 --> 00:12:43,150
Whoo!
300
00:12:46,232 --> 00:12:48,200
Oh, are you okay, Pauly?
301
00:12:48,267 --> 00:12:49,632
- Watch out, Adam!
- Pauly, are you all right?
302
00:12:49,702 --> 00:12:51,329
Pauly, are you all right?
303
00:12:51,737 --> 00:12:53,898
That was amazing. Whoo!
304
00:12:54,874 --> 00:12:57,104
- What the hell? Who did this?
- Yeah, who did this?
305
00:12:57,176 --> 00:12:59,303
Shut up, Cushing. I just asked that question.
306
00:12:59,545 --> 00:13:01,172
Um, we did.
307
00:13:01,247 --> 00:13:03,807
And why would you ever
think that this would be okay?
308
00:13:03,883 --> 00:13:04,975
Because...
309
00:13:05,818 --> 00:13:07,285
No means yes?
310
00:13:08,320 --> 00:13:09,344
No?
311
00:13:10,289 --> 00:13:11,688
That right there
312
00:13:11,757 --> 00:13:13,691
is why I... love you guys!
313
00:13:14,827 --> 00:13:16,192
- You got guts.
- Yeah.
314
00:13:16,362 --> 00:13:19,297
Congratulations.
You get to party with Pauly Shore.
315
00:13:19,365 --> 00:13:20,627
- That's cool.
- Oh! What's he...
316
00:13:20,699 --> 00:13:21,723
Oh, wow.
317
00:13:21,801 --> 00:13:25,202
Enjoy your night, and tomorrow
come see me in my office.
318
00:13:25,938 --> 00:13:27,303
- Bye, Pauly.
- Bye, JP.
319
00:13:28,908 --> 00:13:31,376
This took balls, heaps of them.
320
00:13:31,644 --> 00:13:33,339
Heaps of balls.
321
00:13:33,412 --> 00:13:35,471
- See you tomorrow, VIPs.
- Yeah!
322
00:13:35,548 --> 00:13:38,278
I love my life
323
00:13:40,252 --> 00:13:41,913
We're like Fresh, fresh, fresh
324
00:13:46,025 --> 00:13:47,492
- To Pauly.
- To Pauly.
325
00:13:47,693 --> 00:13:49,058
To Pauly.
326
00:13:49,528 --> 00:13:52,361
Ah, breakfast booze, my favorite.
327
00:13:52,498 --> 00:13:55,467
- So your whole office is a sauna?
- That's right.
328
00:13:55,534 --> 00:13:58,628
Nothing better than sitting in
a spa for seven, eight hours a day,
329
00:13:58,704 --> 00:13:59,762
good for the skin.
330
00:13:59,839 --> 00:14:01,807
And, uh, the strippers
have been here all night?
331
00:14:01,907 --> 00:14:02,931
Absolutely.
332
00:14:03,175 --> 00:14:04,733
Oxygenates their vaginas.
333
00:14:04,810 --> 00:14:06,277
- They love it.
- Sure.
334
00:14:06,612 --> 00:14:08,307
Hey. Hey, how are you?
335
00:14:09,215 --> 00:14:10,512
Ah, it's nice in here.
336
00:14:10,783 --> 00:14:13,343
I've been watching
you very closely this week.
337
00:14:13,419 --> 00:14:14,818
I've wanted you to stare at me.
338
00:14:14,887 --> 00:14:17,151
And I am very impressed with what I see,
339
00:14:17,223 --> 00:14:19,783
and we were wondering
if you would like to join us
340
00:14:19,859 --> 00:14:21,952
full-time at TAC-Van Nuys.
341
00:14:22,027 --> 00:14:23,187
- Yes.
- Yes, we would.
342
00:14:23,262 --> 00:14:24,752
- Thank you so much.
- Yes. This is cool.
343
00:14:24,830 --> 00:14:27,128
- Oh! Up top! Oh, man. Awesome.
- Great work.
344
00:14:27,199 --> 00:14:29,861
There are a couple of, uh, minor details
345
00:14:29,935 --> 00:14:32,699
that we would like to discuss with you.
346
00:14:32,771 --> 00:14:33,760
- Sure. Yeah.
- Yeah.
347
00:14:33,839 --> 00:14:34,863
Alone.
348
00:14:35,608 --> 00:14:37,735
And the girls have
to leave because of this matter?
349
00:14:37,810 --> 00:14:39,869
Yes. Disappear like your fathers.
350
00:14:40,246 --> 00:14:42,339
- Look at her butt.
- Cool. That's awesome.
351
00:14:42,414 --> 00:14:44,075
- Butts rule.
- They do. They rock.
352
00:14:44,149 --> 00:14:48,210
Honestly, JP, you are such a great leader,
I would run through a brick wall for you,
353
00:14:48,287 --> 00:14:50,448
which I've actually done
before in my parent's basement.
354
00:14:50,522 --> 00:14:51,511
Okay, shush. Just listen.
355
00:14:51,590 --> 00:14:55,253
Cushing, shut the... up, and you just listen!
You just listen!
356
00:14:55,327 --> 00:14:57,261
- You just listen, Cushing.
- Bitch.
357
00:14:58,464 --> 00:15:01,126
I'm sure you may have heard that
we are taking over the San Bernardino
358
00:15:01,200 --> 00:15:03,293
and Diamond Bar branches from TAC.
359
00:15:03,435 --> 00:15:05,335
Yeah, yeah. I think I've read about that.
360
00:15:05,404 --> 00:15:06,803
- I heard about it.
- Yeah.
361
00:15:07,373 --> 00:15:10,206
- What does that mean, business-wise?
- Mmm-hmm.
362
00:15:10,276 --> 00:15:12,267
It means that that staff is...
363
00:15:12,344 --> 00:15:14,039
Axed,
364
00:15:14,113 --> 00:15:16,604
and corporate sends us their business.
365
00:15:23,756 --> 00:15:25,951
- Biz-nass.
- And that's fun because, like,
366
00:15:26,025 --> 00:15:28,425
they don't have jobs anymore, right?
367
00:15:29,862 --> 00:15:32,797
My next target is Rancho,
368
00:15:33,365 --> 00:15:36,528
and I cannot wait to see
the look on my ex-wife's face
369
00:15:36,602 --> 00:15:37,728
when I take her down.
370
00:15:39,972 --> 00:15:41,132
You were married to Alice?
371
00:15:41,206 --> 00:15:43,470
Worst nine weeks of my entire life.
372
00:15:43,542 --> 00:15:46,807
I mean, we were sport... for a while there,
373
00:15:46,879 --> 00:15:50,178
because that bitch likes to ride the ride.
374
00:15:50,616 --> 00:15:52,846
- Yep.
- I always thought that.
375
00:15:52,918 --> 00:15:54,783
What I need is for you to go back there
376
00:15:54,853 --> 00:15:57,117
and steal me the presentation from Alice
377
00:15:57,189 --> 00:15:59,054
before the big meeting today.
378
00:15:59,858 --> 00:16:01,689
She's a pretty good writer for a chick.
379
00:16:02,428 --> 00:16:05,022
If she bombs it and I look great,
380
00:16:05,397 --> 00:16:06,728
takeover inevitable.
381
00:16:09,034 --> 00:16:11,935
- Uh, yeah, we're your guys.
- Yeah, we can do that.
382
00:16:12,004 --> 00:16:15,235
Good. Excellent.
Because if you do not do that, you are fired.
383
00:16:15,808 --> 00:16:17,173
- Yeah.
- Duh!
384
00:16:17,977 --> 00:16:19,842
I think my stripper fainted.
385
00:16:20,079 --> 00:16:22,104
Oh, no, no, no, no, not again.
386
00:16:22,247 --> 00:16:24,238
You've never had anyone
die here before, right?
387
00:16:24,950 --> 00:16:26,042
No.
388
00:16:27,353 --> 00:16:28,945
- No means yes. No means yes.
- No means yes.
389
00:16:29,722 --> 00:16:31,485
- I got it. Let's go.
- Yeah.
390
00:16:33,525 --> 00:16:36,392
Whoa. What the hell is that?
391
00:16:37,162 --> 00:16:38,493
I think that's us.
392
00:16:38,564 --> 00:16:41,692
- Wow. That is really, really horrible.
- Yeah.
393
00:16:41,767 --> 00:16:43,826
Well, Waymond painted that for you guys.
394
00:16:43,902 --> 00:16:45,802
He hasn't been the same since you left.
395
00:16:46,005 --> 00:16:47,768
Hasn't spoken a word.
396
00:16:47,840 --> 00:16:48,898
He's tuckered out.
397
00:16:48,974 --> 00:16:50,965
I mean, I don't know
how he finds time to take a nap.
398
00:16:51,043 --> 00:16:52,203
What's going on here?
399
00:16:52,311 --> 00:16:53,972
- That's weird.
- The good old days.
400
00:16:54,313 --> 00:16:56,178
You really like it better over there?
401
00:16:56,615 --> 00:16:58,048
I mean, it's different, you know?
402
00:16:58,117 --> 00:17:00,551
It's intense, you know, like, ah.
403
00:17:00,619 --> 00:17:03,816
But there's Botox to take care
of the stress wrinkles and sushi.
404
00:17:03,889 --> 00:17:05,754
And it doesn't taste like Yoshinoya.
405
00:17:05,824 --> 00:17:09,783
Well, we'd love to have you back here,
get the Wicky Wild Boys Crew back together.
406
00:17:09,928 --> 00:17:11,418
Wicky, wicky wild.
407
00:17:11,630 --> 00:17:13,359
- Yeah, mmm-hmm.
- Okay.
408
00:17:13,565 --> 00:17:16,295
Okay, I know we were never in a group
with Bill called the Wicky Wild Boys,
409
00:17:16,368 --> 00:17:18,461
but maybe we should put this back.
410
00:17:18,604 --> 00:17:21,072
Yeah, I know.
I mean, we do this, those guys get canned.
411
00:17:21,140 --> 00:17:23,700
- Right, exactly.
- Well, well, well...
412
00:17:24,109 --> 00:17:25,599
Did you boys get fired already?
413
00:17:25,711 --> 00:17:27,440
That happened faster than I thought.
414
00:17:27,546 --> 00:17:29,173
No, it didn't, 'cause we're not.
415
00:17:29,281 --> 00:17:34,309
Yeah, in fact, we have a new leader now
who's teaching us how to be great men.
416
00:17:34,386 --> 00:17:36,820
In fact, we're amazing men now,
417
00:17:36,889 --> 00:17:39,016
and we're true playboy pimps, for real.
418
00:17:39,224 --> 00:17:42,523
Well, it's been amazing not having you here.
419
00:17:42,961 --> 00:17:45,794
In fact, I never realized
how much you weighed us down.
420
00:17:46,665 --> 00:17:49,634
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I have a meeting to rock.
421
00:17:50,135 --> 00:17:53,002
Oh, okay. Yeah.
422
00:17:53,439 --> 00:17:55,964
Yeah, we're doing it,
'cause she can't talk to us like that.
423
00:17:56,375 --> 00:17:59,435
You know, she's lucky that
she was married to JP, you know?
424
00:17:59,545 --> 00:18:00,910
How do you let a piece like that go?
425
00:18:00,979 --> 00:18:02,241
He's a hot piece of ass, right?
426
00:18:02,314 --> 00:18:04,908
And you know he's hogged out.
You saw the outline through the towel.
427
00:18:04,983 --> 00:18:06,951
- Oh, I saw it.
- Dude, he is fully hogging.
428
00:18:07,586 --> 00:18:09,315
JP, why don't you kick things off?
429
00:18:09,388 --> 00:18:10,582
One second, Mel.
430
00:18:11,356 --> 00:18:13,654
Okay, do we have the flash drive?
431
00:18:13,792 --> 00:18:16,352
Yeah, we have the flash drive.
432
00:18:16,662 --> 00:18:17,651
Give her hell.
433
00:18:17,763 --> 00:18:19,458
Or, give them, give the whole...
434
00:18:20,232 --> 00:18:22,393
- Okay.
- Whoo! JP! Yeah!
435
00:18:22,468 --> 00:18:25,335
Van Nuys! Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Van Nuys in the house.
436
00:18:25,471 --> 00:18:26,870
You go boy.
437
00:18:27,272 --> 00:18:29,297
So, what we have here is...
438
00:18:30,142 --> 00:18:31,837
Whoa.
439
00:18:31,910 --> 00:18:35,073
Oh, I don't know
what this is about.
440
00:18:35,247 --> 00:18:36,737
Jokes.
441
00:18:37,149 --> 00:18:38,844
Oh. Oh...
442
00:18:39,051 --> 00:18:42,487
Oh! No. Ah, shit.
443
00:18:42,721 --> 00:18:44,086
Shit...
444
00:18:44,156 --> 00:18:45,817
- Did you do this?
- No, we didn't.
445
00:18:47,126 --> 00:18:48,525
You did this.
446
00:18:48,961 --> 00:18:50,724
I don't know what you're talking about.
447
00:18:51,864 --> 00:18:52,853
Fine!
448
00:18:53,298 --> 00:18:54,526
I put up numbers.
449
00:18:54,833 --> 00:18:56,061
I am
450
00:18:56,135 --> 00:18:59,036
Sales Team Six!
451
00:18:59,271 --> 00:19:01,739
I dare you, fire me. Fire me!
452
00:19:01,807 --> 00:19:03,104
You're fired.
453
00:19:03,175 --> 00:19:04,870
Cushing will take over Van Nuys.
454
00:19:05,744 --> 00:19:08,304
This is unacceptable on every level.
455
00:19:08,514 --> 00:19:10,243
I thought it was good. Good presentation.
456
00:19:10,415 --> 00:19:11,575
Thanks, everyone.
457
00:19:12,084 --> 00:19:14,552
Great stuff from almost all of you.
458
00:19:14,653 --> 00:19:18,350
Alice, spectacular presentation, as usual.
459
00:19:18,423 --> 00:19:20,823
Thank you so much, Mel,
and I'll see you next quarter.
460
00:19:20,926 --> 00:19:22,120
Yeah. Okay.
461
00:19:23,195 --> 00:19:24,787
Oh, you boys sneaking out?
462
00:19:24,863 --> 00:19:26,023
- Huh?
- Hmm?
463
00:19:26,198 --> 00:19:29,759
I just wanted to take a second
and thank you for helping me out in there.
464
00:19:30,369 --> 00:19:31,427
What are you talking about?
465
00:19:31,603 --> 00:19:34,731
Oh, you thought it was just a coincidence
that you ran into Cushing,
466
00:19:34,806 --> 00:19:37,400
- and he convinced you into a transfer.
- Uh-huh.
467
00:19:37,476 --> 00:19:40,274
You knew that JP was going to
ask us to take your flash drive?
468
00:19:40,579 --> 00:19:42,774
Cushing, my new boyfriend,
469
00:19:42,948 --> 00:19:44,916
gave me the inside scoop a week ago,
470
00:19:44,983 --> 00:19:46,075
and I took it from there.
471
00:19:46,151 --> 00:19:47,618
- Oh!
- That's good.
472
00:19:48,187 --> 00:19:50,655
- You're banging Cushing, too?
- Oh, my gosh.
473
00:19:50,722 --> 00:19:52,189
Man, I bet he's hogging out as well.
474
00:19:52,257 --> 00:19:54,054
Yeah, you are roping
in some good ones, huh?
475
00:19:54,726 --> 00:19:58,253
Is it huge? Like, what does it look...
Eh, you know what? It doesn't matter.
476
00:19:58,330 --> 00:20:00,855
- Who's bigger?
- That was an awesome leadership move.
477
00:20:00,933 --> 00:20:02,867
- Thank you.
- Honestly, we were wrong about you.
478
00:20:02,935 --> 00:20:04,698
You don't always act like a bitch.
479
00:20:04,836 --> 00:20:08,203
Hey, I do not act like a bitch.
480
00:20:09,908 --> 00:20:11,375
I am a bitch.
481
00:20:11,977 --> 00:20:15,310
A bad, bad bitch, you bitch.
482
00:20:21,987 --> 00:20:23,284
Pretty cool we got our jobs back,
483
00:20:23,355 --> 00:20:26,085
and we finally got time
to smoke some weed on the clock.
484
00:20:26,158 --> 00:20:28,922
Well, the bitch knows
we're here to help, right?
485
00:20:29,194 --> 00:20:30,855
What? She calls herself a bitch.
486
00:20:30,929 --> 00:20:32,021
- She did.
- So I can say that.
487
00:20:32,097 --> 00:20:33,758
Whoa, whoa. You hear that?
488
00:20:33,832 --> 00:20:36,995
Whoa! I think we got another
beat boxer in the office.
489
00:20:37,636 --> 00:20:41,663
Ders, go in there and then rap over his flow,
and I'll FaceTime Pauly.
490
00:20:41,740 --> 00:20:43,537
- Yeah, I'll do that, yeah.
- You got his number!
491
00:20:43,609 --> 00:20:45,873
Yes, I did.
492
00:20:46,378 --> 00:20:48,243
- Whoa.
- Oh! Oh! Oh, God!
493
00:20:48,313 --> 00:20:49,473
Oh, uh...
494
00:20:49,748 --> 00:20:51,045
We weren't, uh...
495
00:20:51,116 --> 00:20:54,051
No, we just thought
we heard somebody eat-boxing.
496
00:20:54,119 --> 00:20:55,484
Eat-boxing.
497
00:20:56,555 --> 00:20:57,647
Just...
498
00:21:00,092 --> 00:21:01,150
Nice.
499
00:21:01,226 --> 00:21:02,420
Nice.
500
00:21:06,732 --> 00:21:09,826
It's okay. This happens sometimes.
Her cells are just too oxygenated.
501
00:21:09,935 --> 00:21:11,061
She'll come back. She'll be okay.
502
00:21:11,703 --> 00:21:13,432
- She's pretty alive.
- Yeah.
503
00:21:13,505 --> 00:21:15,837
- She's still warm, right?
- Whoo!
504
00:21:15,941 --> 00:21:18,000
- I'm excited to work here.
- Yeah.
505
00:21:18,076 --> 00:21:19,668
This is going to be fun.
It's going to be fun.
506
00:21:19,745 --> 00:21:21,610
- Yeah, yeah.
- Why did it have to be mine?
507
00:21:24,000 --> 00:21:32,000
Ripped & Corrected By mstoll