1
00:00:03,136 --> 00:00:04,660
Morning, everyone.
2
00:00:04,738 --> 00:00:05,966
Morning, sir.
3
00:00:06,039 --> 00:00:07,438
Hey, look.
4
00:00:07,507 --> 00:00:08,804
We're food stain buds.
5
00:00:09,109 --> 00:00:11,077
Who are you wearing?
Porridge?
6
00:00:11,144 --> 00:00:12,133
Um...
7
00:00:12,946 --> 00:00:14,436
Oatmeal.
8
00:00:14,514 --> 00:00:15,503
Hmm.
9
00:00:15,915 --> 00:00:17,644
Oh, my God.
10
00:00:17,717 --> 00:00:18,979
He didn't even
wipe it off.
11
00:00:19,052 --> 00:00:20,519
He's totally
given up on life.
12
00:00:20,587 --> 00:00:21,849
It's loneliness.
13
00:00:21,921 --> 00:00:24,048
Ever since Kevin left
for his sabbatical in Paris,
14
00:00:24,124 --> 00:00:25,386
he hasn't been the same.
15
00:00:25,458 --> 00:00:26,925
I tried to get him
out of the house.
16
00:00:26,993 --> 00:00:29,393
I invited him to bar trivia,
but he turned me down.
17
00:00:29,462 --> 00:00:31,487
Not that Trivia Newton John
needed the help.
18
00:00:31,564 --> 00:00:32,997
We're nationally ranked.
It's no big deal.
19
00:00:33,066 --> 00:00:34,328
You're right,
it's not.
20
00:00:34,401 --> 00:00:37,734
Well, aren't you all just a
bunch of big-hearted dum-dums.
21
00:00:37,804 --> 00:00:39,271
You want to make him
feel less lonely?
22
00:00:40,106 --> 00:00:41,471
This is how you do it.
23
00:00:41,541 --> 00:00:43,702
A case file?
Yeah, dude loves work.
24
00:00:43,777 --> 00:00:45,506
I thought all your cases
were closed.
25
00:00:45,578 --> 00:00:47,045
You were bragging
about it so much last night,
26
00:00:47,113 --> 00:00:48,671
I couldn't hear the end
of the neighbors' fight.
27
00:00:48,782 --> 00:00:51,148
It ended in sex. It always does.
It didn't make me horny.
28
00:00:51,217 --> 00:00:54,243
It's a cold case from my
first year as a detective.
29
00:00:54,320 --> 00:00:55,309
Is it active again?
30
00:00:55,388 --> 00:00:56,946
No, but Holt doesn't
have to know that.
31
00:00:57,023 --> 00:00:58,183
So you're gonna
lie to him?
32
00:00:58,258 --> 00:01:00,852
No, I'm going to make him
forget about his sadness
33
00:01:00,927 --> 00:01:02,622
through the power of...
34
00:01:03,296 --> 00:01:04,558
Distraction!
35
00:01:07,767 --> 00:01:08,756
He's gone.
36
00:01:08,835 --> 00:01:10,826
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
37
00:01:13,000 --> 00:01:18,000
Ripped & Corrected By mstoll
38
00:01:29,055 --> 00:01:31,285
Ah! Hola, mi capitán.
39
00:01:31,357 --> 00:01:33,291
Why am I speaking
Italian, you might ask?
40
00:01:33,359 --> 00:01:34,348
That was Spanish.
41
00:01:34,427 --> 00:01:35,860
Yeah, there are
too many languages.
42
00:01:35,929 --> 00:01:38,227
An old case of mine
is starting to heat up,
43
00:01:38,298 --> 00:01:42,234
and I'd like your old help
to help me solve it. Señor?
44
00:01:42,302 --> 00:01:44,270
Still Spanish.
Right.
45
00:01:44,337 --> 00:01:46,862
Joey Garibaldi
was a mafia lieutenant.
46
00:01:46,973 --> 00:01:48,838
About eight years ago,
I was closing in on him
47
00:01:48,908 --> 00:01:50,102
when he disappeared.
48
00:01:50,176 --> 00:01:53,077
But now I'm hearing
chatter on the street
49
00:01:53,146 --> 00:01:54,670
that he's back in town.
50
00:01:54,747 --> 00:01:56,374
Will you help me?
51
00:01:57,016 --> 00:01:58,040
Mmm.
52
00:01:58,118 --> 00:01:59,813
Sounds interesting.
Count me in.
53
00:01:59,886 --> 00:02:01,478
Yes! Thank you
very much, sir.
54
00:02:01,621 --> 00:02:04,215
Uh, good-a bye-a.
55
00:02:04,757 --> 00:02:05,917
Italian.
56
00:02:07,026 --> 00:02:08,516
Ooh,
standardized tests?
57
00:02:08,595 --> 00:02:10,062
I have a great trick.
58
00:02:10,130 --> 00:02:12,223
Fill in all the bubbles
with Wite-Out,
59
00:02:12,298 --> 00:02:15,096
jams the machine,
everyone passes.
60
00:02:15,168 --> 00:02:17,636
These are practice
for the lieutenant's exam.
61
00:02:17,704 --> 00:02:20,605
They're kicking my butt.
I can't get better than 70%.
62
00:02:20,940 --> 00:02:22,601
C-minus,
the perfect grade.
63
00:02:22,675 --> 00:02:24,609
You pass, but
you're still hot.
64
00:02:24,677 --> 00:02:27,168
Captain Holt gave me
his test to help me study.
65
00:02:28,915 --> 00:02:31,008
Look at what the grader
wrote on his essay.
66
00:02:31,084 --> 00:02:32,608
"Thank you
for writing this.
67
00:02:32,685 --> 00:02:34,482
"Reading it made me
a better man."
68
00:02:34,921 --> 00:02:36,650
I'll never be as good
a leader as Holt.
69
00:02:36,789 --> 00:02:38,950
You need to stop
focusing on tests.
70
00:02:39,559 --> 00:02:42,995
There's more to life than
scores and book learning, okay?
71
00:02:43,129 --> 00:02:45,461
Look at me, I've had no
official dance training.
72
00:02:45,532 --> 00:02:47,295
Yet here I stand.
73
00:02:48,902 --> 00:02:50,130
A miracle of movement.
74
00:02:55,441 --> 00:02:56,965
Hey, you guys
seen Boyle?
75
00:02:57,043 --> 00:02:59,341
Yep, he's in a little ball
under his desk.
76
00:03:00,280 --> 00:03:01,406
DIAZ: Oh, no.
77
00:03:02,115 --> 00:03:03,446
Did you watch Grimm
again last night?
78
00:03:03,550 --> 00:03:04,744
You know it gives you
nightmares.
79
00:03:04,884 --> 00:03:06,215
I'm sad.
80
00:03:06,286 --> 00:03:07,753
Jason died this morning.
81
00:03:07,820 --> 00:03:09,310
I'm sorry.
That's terrible.
82
00:03:09,389 --> 00:03:11,186
Is he a friend of yours?
He was my dog.
83
00:03:11,257 --> 00:03:12,554
Oh, okay,
so no big deal then.
84
00:03:12,692 --> 00:03:14,216
No, it is to me.
85
00:03:14,294 --> 00:03:16,728
But don't worry,
86
00:03:16,796 --> 00:03:18,161
I'll find a way
to power through.
87
00:03:21,668 --> 00:03:22,657
Oh, God.
88
00:03:23,036 --> 00:03:24,628
This is how
Jason saw the world.
89
00:03:24,704 --> 00:03:26,365
Wait, was this your dog
that humped everything?
90
00:03:26,439 --> 00:03:27,838
Yeah, that's how he died.
91
00:03:27,907 --> 00:03:29,704
He was going to town
on one of my snow boots,
92
00:03:29,776 --> 00:03:32,006
and his little heart
just gave out.
93
00:03:32,078 --> 00:03:33,739
He didn't even finish.
Gross.
94
00:03:33,813 --> 00:03:36,008
Anyway, we have to work a
string of B&E's on 4th Street.
95
00:03:37,016 --> 00:03:38,005
It's time for you
to move on.
96
00:03:38,084 --> 00:03:39,073
It's what Jackson
would've wanted.
97
00:03:39,152 --> 00:03:40,881
Jason!
Whatever, little buddy.
98
00:03:42,021 --> 00:03:44,751
Captain, thank you
for meeting me.
99
00:03:44,824 --> 00:03:46,314
Sorry to make you
work on a Saturday.
100
00:03:46,392 --> 00:03:47,518
No, nonsense,
I was free.
101
00:03:47,594 --> 00:03:48,686
Kevin is still in Paris.
102
00:03:48,761 --> 00:03:51,696
Is he? Wow, I totally
forgot about that.
103
00:03:51,764 --> 00:03:53,823
Any-hoops, this is
all the stuff that we got
104
00:03:53,900 --> 00:03:55,925
from Garibaldi's apartment
after he disappeared.
105
00:03:56,102 --> 00:03:57,126
Tell me what you see.
106
00:03:57,870 --> 00:04:00,202
This man is
in every photograph.
107
00:04:00,273 --> 00:04:01,433
Nick DiTullio.
108
00:04:01,507 --> 00:04:04,374
I actually brought him in eight
years ago, but he refused to talk.
109
00:04:04,444 --> 00:04:05,968
Of course,
you know the saying,
110
00:04:06,045 --> 00:04:08,605
"Time shall open up
the mouth of every man
111
00:04:08,681 --> 00:04:10,080
"to the truth
of his neighbor."
112
00:04:10,149 --> 00:04:11,776
All right, it's a real saying.
Let's not dwell on it.
113
00:04:11,851 --> 00:04:14,251
The point is, he's definitely
gonna tell us where Garibaldi is.
114
00:04:14,387 --> 00:04:16,446
I don't know where
Garibaldi is, all right?
115
00:04:16,522 --> 00:04:17,682
It's not like
we were close.
116
00:04:17,757 --> 00:04:19,054
I was just his trainer
at the gym.
117
00:04:19,158 --> 00:04:21,023
Then why were you always
going out to dinner with him?
118
00:04:21,094 --> 00:04:24,188
Was he doing reps of linguine?
Nice.
119
00:04:24,264 --> 00:04:26,198
Look, you don't say no
to Garibaldi, all right?
120
00:04:26,266 --> 00:04:28,962
That's why I always let him work his
chest and his abs and never his legs.
121
00:04:29,035 --> 00:04:31,765
Yeah, the key is balance. That's
why I never worked any of it.
122
00:04:31,838 --> 00:04:33,271
Unless you guys are gonna
arrest me, I got to go.
123
00:04:33,339 --> 00:04:34,567
There's an emergency
at the gym.
124
00:04:35,942 --> 00:04:37,204
"Emergency at the gym."
125
00:04:37,310 --> 00:04:39,107
Just when two cops
show up at his door.
126
00:04:39,178 --> 00:04:40,941
That seems suspicious.
We should follow him.
127
00:04:41,014 --> 00:04:43,608
Yeah, this case might
actually lead somewhere.
128
00:04:43,683 --> 00:04:45,310
Why do you
sound surprised?
129
00:04:45,385 --> 00:04:49,185
Because every day
on this job is a wonder.
130
00:04:51,591 --> 00:04:53,183
Damn right it is.
131
00:05:04,570 --> 00:05:06,800
Medical examiner,
jackpot.
132
00:05:06,873 --> 00:05:08,602
The gym is
full of bodies.
133
00:05:08,675 --> 00:05:09,972
No, Department of Health.
134
00:05:10,643 --> 00:05:12,201
There's been an outbreak
of the mumps.
135
00:05:12,278 --> 00:05:14,746
(CHUCKLES) Mumps,
that's a funny word.
136
00:05:14,814 --> 00:05:17,874
It's actually a very serious and
highly contagious infectious disease.
137
00:05:17,950 --> 00:05:18,939
Yeah, but we're fine.
138
00:05:19,018 --> 00:05:21,452
We were only in contact with that
guy for a couple of seconds.
139
00:05:21,521 --> 00:05:23,421
Plus, he didn't even
lick any of our eyeballs.
140
00:05:23,489 --> 00:05:24,888
I'm afraid you both
have the mumps.
141
00:05:24,957 --> 00:05:27,619
(CHUCKLES) Mumps,
still a funny word.
142
00:05:28,661 --> 00:05:30,288
Are we gonna die?
143
00:05:32,265 --> 00:05:34,130
So, you both
have the mumps.
144
00:05:34,200 --> 00:05:35,792
Sorry to say,
it's very contagious.
145
00:05:36,235 --> 00:05:37,725
You may not want to
be here, Detective.
146
00:05:38,004 --> 00:05:38,993
Oh, it's cool.
147
00:05:39,072 --> 00:05:41,131
I keep up to date
on all my vaccinations.
148
00:05:41,207 --> 00:05:43,141
I'm immune to stuff
you've never even heard of.
149
00:05:43,209 --> 00:05:46,042
But not immune to braggadocio.
(CHUCKLING)
150
00:05:46,112 --> 00:05:47,739
Anyhow, over the
next several hours,
151
00:05:47,814 --> 00:05:50,783
you will more than likely
develop fever, aching, fatigue.
152
00:05:50,850 --> 00:05:51,839
Doesn't sound too bad.
153
00:05:51,918 --> 00:05:53,442
Also, tart foods
will cause intense jaw pain,
154
00:05:53,519 --> 00:05:55,612
so you may want to
avoid sour candies.
155
00:05:55,688 --> 00:05:57,747
What?
You may get painful goiter-like swelling
156
00:05:57,824 --> 00:06:00,816
in your neck and often extreme
testicular discomfort.
157
00:06:02,061 --> 00:06:03,119
Okay, okay.
Cool, cool.
158
00:06:03,196 --> 00:06:04,527
Cool, cool, cool.
Cool, cool, cool.
159
00:06:04,597 --> 00:06:05,791
No doubt.
160
00:06:05,865 --> 00:06:07,730
Due to the highly contagious
nature of the virus,
161
00:06:07,800 --> 00:06:10,701
you will both be quarantined to
your houses for the next nine days.
162
00:06:10,770 --> 00:06:12,670
Well, nine days
in isolation.
163
00:06:12,739 --> 00:06:15,207
Sir, I'd be happy
to keep you company.
164
00:06:15,274 --> 00:06:18,539
We can watch the ten-part
Nicholas Nickleby special on PBS.
165
00:06:18,611 --> 00:06:21,079
Hear there's a lot of long,
quiet stretches.
166
00:06:21,147 --> 00:06:22,739
I do love long,
quiet stretches,
167
00:06:22,815 --> 00:06:24,282
but I don't want to
be a burden.
168
00:06:24,350 --> 00:06:26,944
Plus, I'm getting used to
being on my own.
169
00:06:27,487 --> 00:06:32,015
Or we could be quarantined
together, you know, work the case.
170
00:06:33,059 --> 00:06:35,459
Yes, that actually
sounds kind of fun.
171
00:06:35,528 --> 00:06:37,894
Kind of? It's gonna be
the best week ever.
172
00:06:37,964 --> 00:06:41,400
I'm sorry, did you not hear me say
"extreme testicular discomfort"?
173
00:06:41,467 --> 00:06:43,867
Yes, we heard you,
Dr. Bad News Doctor.
174
00:06:44,537 --> 00:06:46,698
Okay, so I talked
to Captain Holt.
175
00:06:46,773 --> 00:06:48,172
He and Jake
have the mumps.
176
00:06:48,441 --> 00:06:50,068
I'm in charge
until Holt gets better.
177
00:06:50,143 --> 00:06:53,010
Hello, you wanted to see if you
could make a great captain.
178
00:06:53,079 --> 00:06:54,512
Now's your chance
to shine.
179
00:06:54,781 --> 00:06:56,578
You're the pretty
little understudy.
180
00:06:56,649 --> 00:07:00,483
And the aging lead?
Well, she just fell down the stairs.
181
00:07:00,553 --> 00:07:05,855
Now all's you got to do
is beat those wings and fly.
182
00:07:05,925 --> 00:07:07,256
So for the next
two weeks,
183
00:07:07,326 --> 00:07:09,226
Captain Holt will be
on medical leave,
184
00:07:09,295 --> 00:07:11,354
which means I am
the acting captain.
185
00:07:11,664 --> 00:07:13,791
And we are
your royal subjects.
186
00:07:13,866 --> 00:07:14,855
Do continue.
187
00:07:14,934 --> 00:07:17,232
I want this precinct to get
our normal work done,
188
00:07:17,303 --> 00:07:19,737
but also, we're gonna
clean out the evidence room,
189
00:07:19,806 --> 00:07:21,330
step up
community service,
190
00:07:21,474 --> 00:07:25,638
and complete these
22 additional tasks.
191
00:07:25,711 --> 00:07:29,340
Every time we check one off the
list, you're gonna hear this bell.
192
00:07:29,415 --> 00:07:31,713
It's the sound
of victory.
193
00:07:32,318 --> 00:07:34,411
Hmm, you should add
"fix bell" to that list.
194
00:07:35,855 --> 00:07:37,379
Morning, Captain.
Peralta.
195
00:07:37,457 --> 00:07:39,652
I'd like to introduce you
to someone.
196
00:07:40,393 --> 00:07:41,382
(GRUNTS)
197
00:07:42,161 --> 00:07:44,629
His name is Simon,
and I hate him.
198
00:07:44,697 --> 00:07:45,925
Hello, Simon.
199
00:07:46,866 --> 00:07:48,595
This is Balthazar.
200
00:07:48,734 --> 00:07:51,362
He's an evil demon
who spits fire in my throat.
201
00:07:51,437 --> 00:07:52,495
Goiters, huh?
202
00:07:52,572 --> 00:07:53,869
Anyway.
203
00:07:53,940 --> 00:07:56,067
I've been looking over these
photographs of the restaurant,
204
00:07:56,142 --> 00:07:58,542
and I've identified several
other known mob types.
205
00:07:58,678 --> 00:08:01,044
(SHUDDERS) What is it?
Did you see something?
206
00:08:01,113 --> 00:08:03,104
No, I just got
very cold very fast.
207
00:08:03,282 --> 00:08:05,842
And now my entire body
is somehow on fire.
208
00:08:05,918 --> 00:08:08,546
Oh, these mumps
are jerks. Phew!
209
00:08:08,621 --> 00:08:12,751
I also noticed this van is parked out
front in several other photographs.
210
00:08:12,825 --> 00:08:13,951
I never noticed that.
211
00:08:14,026 --> 00:08:17,018
The restaurant must have been under
surveillance. I bet it was the feds.
212
00:08:17,096 --> 00:08:19,121
You're right. I'll reach out
to my contact at the Bureau,
213
00:08:19,198 --> 00:08:20,358
see if I can get us
some footage.
214
00:08:20,433 --> 00:08:22,594
Good idea. Also, I know
you're not supposed to,
215
00:08:22,668 --> 00:08:23,999
but I kind of want to
poke my mump.
216
00:08:24,070 --> 00:08:26,538
Bad idea. I'm going in.
Here we go.
217
00:08:26,606 --> 00:08:27,834
(CRIES IN PAIN)
218
00:08:27,907 --> 00:08:30,671
It hurts! How did I not
see that coming?
219
00:08:31,344 --> 00:08:33,107
(EXHALES)
I feel dizzy.
220
00:08:34,347 --> 00:08:36,338
Hey. You're off the floor.
221
00:08:36,415 --> 00:08:38,542
Yeah. Well, it's like
my dad used to say.
222
00:08:38,618 --> 00:08:41,883
"Real men don't cry...
for more than three days."
223
00:08:41,954 --> 00:08:43,979
So I decided to
get my butt back to work.
224
00:08:44,056 --> 00:08:45,887
Good. You go through all the
witness statements yet?
225
00:08:45,958 --> 00:08:47,619
What? Oh, no.
226
00:08:47,693 --> 00:08:50,560
By "work," I meant on Jason's
in memoriam video.
227
00:08:50,696 --> 00:08:52,323
Are you serious?
Oh, yeah.
228
00:08:52,398 --> 00:08:53,865
Take a look
at what I got so far.
229
00:08:54,567 --> 00:09:00,164
♪ Tell me how am I supposed
to live without you
230
00:09:03,442 --> 00:09:07,401
♪ Now that I've been
loving you so long
231
00:09:08,748 --> 00:09:10,943
Hey, we've got
a lot to do.
232
00:09:11,017 --> 00:09:13,781
Focus up and stop
watching funny dog videos.
233
00:09:13,853 --> 00:09:15,013
(WHIMPERS)
234
00:09:15,922 --> 00:09:17,617
This might just be
the fever talking,
235
00:09:17,690 --> 00:09:19,851
but this unedited footage
of an Italian restaurant
236
00:09:19,926 --> 00:09:22,486
from eight years ago might be
the best movie I've ever seen.
237
00:09:22,628 --> 00:09:24,095
Also, how weird
are forks?
238
00:09:24,163 --> 00:09:27,030
Forks are very weird.
I've always thought so.
239
00:09:27,099 --> 00:09:29,067
Yeah, yeah.
(SNIFFLES)
240
00:09:29,135 --> 00:09:31,729
Did we take too much cold medicine?
Not by a long shot.
241
00:09:31,837 --> 00:09:33,771
Balthazar is
a thirsty bitch.
242
00:09:33,906 --> 00:09:36,136
Ah, I'll drink to that.
(LAUGHS)
243
00:09:38,444 --> 00:09:40,435
Wait, look.
(GRUNTS)
244
00:09:41,547 --> 00:09:42,844
Garkabargo!
245
00:09:43,115 --> 00:09:46,573
Oh, sorry, can't...
Can't talk.
246
00:09:46,652 --> 00:09:47,983
Need more medi-jen.
247
00:09:50,623 --> 00:09:51,612
Garibaldi!
248
00:09:52,658 --> 00:09:55,024
He's eating snakes!
249
00:09:55,227 --> 00:09:57,354
No, it's spaghetti.
250
00:09:57,496 --> 00:09:59,726
(GROANS)
It's always spaghetti.
251
00:09:59,799 --> 00:10:01,994
I'm just saying,
if that's spaghetti,
252
00:10:02,068 --> 00:10:03,763
it looks like snakes.
253
00:10:03,836 --> 00:10:04,825
(BELL DINGS)
254
00:10:05,037 --> 00:10:06,368
That's right, Nine-Nine.
255
00:10:06,439 --> 00:10:08,202
That's the sound
of the victory bell.
256
00:10:08,307 --> 00:10:10,867
We just crossed our
first task off the list.
257
00:10:11,110 --> 00:10:12,099
(ALL CHEERING)
GINA: Oh, my goodness.
258
00:10:12,178 --> 00:10:14,612
Terry, that is so great.
Which one was it?
259
00:10:14,714 --> 00:10:16,511
Fix bell.
All right.
260
00:10:16,582 --> 00:10:18,914
Little less than I had hoped
for, but still a thing.
261
00:10:18,985 --> 00:10:20,577
You gonna hear
that sound nonstop.
262
00:10:20,786 --> 00:10:22,981
HITCHCOCK: Unhand her,
you beast!
263
00:10:23,055 --> 00:10:24,215
Give it to me!
264
00:10:24,290 --> 00:10:25,917
What the hell is
going on in here?
265
00:10:25,992 --> 00:10:27,254
Hitchcock's trying
to steal my sandwich.
266
00:10:27,360 --> 00:10:29,794
Well, we both ordered meatball
subs, but they only delivered one.
267
00:10:29,862 --> 00:10:30,954
It's mine!
268
00:10:31,030 --> 00:10:34,261
Guys, guys, look,
just walk to the sub shop,
269
00:10:34,333 --> 00:10:36,824
it's a block away,
and get a second sandwich.
270
00:10:37,036 --> 00:10:39,129
Walk?
Are you insane?
271
00:10:39,238 --> 00:10:41,172
Fine, cut the damn
sandwich in half.
272
00:10:41,240 --> 00:10:43,834
And then what, genius?
We each eat a 6-inch sub?
273
00:10:43,909 --> 00:10:45,342
Two and a half
meatballs a piece?
274
00:10:45,411 --> 00:10:47,242
Are we children?
What is this, Russia?
275
00:10:47,313 --> 00:10:49,304
Okay, that's it.
No one eats the sub.
276
00:10:49,882 --> 00:10:51,008
Get back to work!
277
00:10:54,954 --> 00:10:56,945
Wait a minute. Why'd he
just go in the kitchen?
278
00:10:57,023 --> 00:10:58,115
Do we have eyes
in the kitchen?
279
00:10:58,190 --> 00:10:59,782
We got eyes everywhere, man.
280
00:10:59,892 --> 00:11:02,087
Ow, ow, icky, icky, ow.
281
00:11:02,328 --> 00:11:04,694
Look, he slipped
the chef a piece of paper.
282
00:11:04,764 --> 00:11:06,356
I bet it's the address
of his hideout.
283
00:11:06,432 --> 00:11:07,899
The chef knows
where the hideout is.
284
00:11:07,967 --> 00:11:10,527
His name is Richie Lignardi.
285
00:11:10,603 --> 00:11:12,537
We talk to him,
we find Garibaldi.
286
00:11:12,605 --> 00:11:14,596
We have to go right now.
287
00:11:15,675 --> 00:11:16,937
Go where?
(GASPS)
288
00:11:17,009 --> 00:11:18,374
What's on your face?
Huh?
289
00:11:18,444 --> 00:11:21,777
Oh, right. Yes,
my disgusting deformity.
290
00:11:21,847 --> 00:11:24,145
Um, here, let me just...
291
00:11:24,750 --> 00:11:26,843
Hey, what's up, girl?
292
00:11:26,919 --> 00:11:28,784
Better?
It's not worse.
293
00:11:28,854 --> 00:11:30,981
We're on our way right
now to talk to a lead
294
00:11:31,057 --> 00:11:33,116
that knows where
Garibaldi's hideout is.
295
00:11:33,192 --> 00:11:34,489
You're quarantined.
296
00:11:34,560 --> 00:11:36,221
You can't go
outside spewing mumps
297
00:11:36,295 --> 00:11:37,887
like a couple of
mump fountains.
298
00:11:37,997 --> 00:11:39,259
Not like this, we can't!
299
00:11:39,331 --> 00:11:40,958
♪ Everyday I'm hustlin'
300
00:11:41,033 --> 00:11:42,967
♪ E- everyday I'm hustlin'
301
00:11:43,035 --> 00:11:44,468
♪ Everyday I'm hustlin'
302
00:11:44,537 --> 00:11:46,437
♪ E- everyday I'm hustlin'
303
00:11:46,505 --> 00:11:47,972
♪ Everyday I'm hustlin' ♪
304
00:11:48,040 --> 00:11:49,803
Stop, you can't
leave at all.
305
00:11:49,875 --> 00:11:51,433
Good luck trying
to stop us.
306
00:11:51,510 --> 00:11:53,444
You'll never catch us!
307
00:11:55,081 --> 00:11:56,878
Amy is Usain Bolt.
308
00:11:56,949 --> 00:11:58,678
Is this the piece of
paper you're looking for?
309
00:11:58,751 --> 00:12:00,343
You found the address?
310
00:12:00,419 --> 00:12:03,252
No, it's a recipe
for baked ziti.
311
00:12:03,322 --> 00:12:05,654
It was taped to your
wall the entire time.
312
00:12:05,725 --> 00:12:07,386
You're delirious,
and you're sick,
313
00:12:07,460 --> 00:12:09,087
and you definitely
didn't solve the case.
314
00:12:09,161 --> 00:12:10,458
You need to go back inside.
315
00:12:10,529 --> 00:12:12,087
Well, I can't.
316
00:12:12,164 --> 00:12:13,631
My legs stopped working.
317
00:12:13,699 --> 00:12:15,394
(GROANING)
318
00:12:15,468 --> 00:12:18,301
My testicles! The mumps
have reached my testicles.
319
00:12:20,039 --> 00:12:21,666
All right,
just finish taking off
320
00:12:21,741 --> 00:12:23,299
your totally
ineffective biohazard suits
321
00:12:23,375 --> 00:12:24,501
and have a little rest.
322
00:12:24,577 --> 00:12:26,135
Nonsense, Santiago.
323
00:12:26,212 --> 00:12:28,009
We just have to
buckle down and work harder.
324
00:12:28,080 --> 00:12:29,672
We simply hit
a bump in the road.
325
00:12:29,749 --> 00:12:32,309
More like a mump in the road.
326
00:12:32,384 --> 00:12:34,375
(BOTH LAUGHING)
327
00:12:34,453 --> 00:12:36,887
(BOTH GROANING)
328
00:12:37,022 --> 00:12:38,489
Such a good one.
329
00:12:38,557 --> 00:12:40,218
Jake, can I talk to you
in private for a minute?
330
00:12:40,292 --> 00:12:44,194
Sure thing, let me just snag this,
cover up the ol' swell sack.
331
00:12:44,730 --> 00:12:45,958
All right.
332
00:12:46,031 --> 00:12:47,225
Okay, so here's the deal.
333
00:12:47,299 --> 00:12:49,267
I have a high fever,
and I can't control my body,
334
00:12:49,335 --> 00:12:50,802
but you can do
whatever you want to me.
335
00:12:50,870 --> 00:12:53,031
Oh, but don't touch my
mouth, neck, or testicles.
336
00:12:54,640 --> 00:12:56,107
You've badly
misread the situation.
337
00:12:56,308 --> 00:12:57,673
Oh, thank God.
338
00:12:57,743 --> 00:12:59,711
Jake, you need to
drop this case.
339
00:12:59,779 --> 00:13:00,768
What are you
talking about?
340
00:13:00,846 --> 00:13:01,835
The plan is
working perfectly.
341
00:13:01,914 --> 00:13:03,006
Holt hasn't been
lonely all week.
342
00:13:03,082 --> 00:13:04,947
Yeah, because he's
too busy almost dying.
343
00:13:05,017 --> 00:13:06,507
Look at him.
344
00:13:07,186 --> 00:13:09,381
What? He's just
Beautiful Mind-ing it.
345
00:13:10,089 --> 00:13:11,454
Because he's a genius.
346
00:13:11,524 --> 00:13:14,220
He's writing the word "case"
over and over again.
347
00:13:14,527 --> 00:13:16,324
(GROANS) Now he's
spelling it with a "K."
348
00:13:16,395 --> 00:13:17,453
PERALTA: Is that not
how you spell it?
349
00:13:17,530 --> 00:13:20,124
Again, I have a mouth, neck,
and testicle-melting fever.
350
00:13:20,199 --> 00:13:21,962
Jake. Enough is enough.
Hmm? Yeah.
351
00:13:22,034 --> 00:13:24,298
You need to drop this
stupid backburner cold case
352
00:13:24,370 --> 00:13:26,736
before you both die
or I will kill you.
353
00:13:30,609 --> 00:13:32,736
Oh, my God, I thought
I was following her.
354
00:13:32,845 --> 00:13:34,142
Yep, I should
probably lie down.
355
00:13:34,213 --> 00:13:35,339
Here we go.
356
00:13:36,182 --> 00:13:37,206
(GROANS)
357
00:13:37,283 --> 00:13:38,580
Case!
358
00:13:42,922 --> 00:13:45,288
What are you doing?
I'm just sealing Jason's collar
359
00:13:45,357 --> 00:13:47,791
in an airtight bag so
it retains his scent.
360
00:13:48,260 --> 00:13:49,955
I don't know how
many whiffs I have left.
361
00:13:50,462 --> 00:13:51,588
Wow.
362
00:13:52,364 --> 00:13:54,832
Look, I know that dog meant a
lot to you, so I got you this.
363
00:13:58,270 --> 00:13:59,464
It's a dog.
364
00:13:59,538 --> 00:14:02,200
His name's Arlo, but you can
call him Jason Two or whatever.
365
00:14:02,274 --> 00:14:05,835
Seriously? I can't just replace
Jason with some other dog.
366
00:14:05,911 --> 00:14:07,902
Why not? All dogs
are basically the same.
367
00:14:07,980 --> 00:14:09,948
Watch this.
Arlo, go hump that toy.
368
00:14:10,516 --> 00:14:12,609
(TOY SQUEAKS) Get away from that.
That's Jason's.
369
00:14:13,485 --> 00:14:15,817
Look, man,
I've been patient.
370
00:14:15,888 --> 00:14:17,515
We have a case we
need to work on.
371
00:14:17,590 --> 00:14:19,217
It's time for you to
get over it, move on.
372
00:14:19,458 --> 00:14:21,585
Move on? Move on.
373
00:14:22,228 --> 00:14:25,220
Jason was part of my family, Rosa.
I loved him.
374
00:14:25,397 --> 00:14:28,264
His humping was the only thing
that got me through my divorce.
375
00:14:28,367 --> 00:14:30,358
Seeing him so
happy made me believe
376
00:14:30,502 --> 00:14:32,493
that I could be
happy one day, too.
377
00:14:33,539 --> 00:14:35,200
You wouldn't understand
this because you
378
00:14:35,341 --> 00:14:37,036
have a motorcycle
helmet for a heart,
379
00:14:37,109 --> 00:14:38,804
but I need to
feel this sadness.
380
00:14:38,944 --> 00:14:42,243
So the only thing that I'm
moving on from is you.
381
00:14:42,948 --> 00:14:44,210
(TOY SQUEAKS)
382
00:14:47,620 --> 00:14:49,554
So I, like,
have a dog now?
383
00:14:51,123 --> 00:14:53,091
Hey, what's going
on with those files?
384
00:14:53,158 --> 00:14:54,557
Oh, we're not
working on them.
385
00:14:54,627 --> 00:14:56,288
We're on strike.
Hunger strike.
386
00:14:56,362 --> 00:14:57,795
You're eating
potato chips.
387
00:14:57,863 --> 00:14:58,887
SCULLY: Chips don't count.
388
00:14:58,964 --> 00:15:01,330
My doctor said they have
zero nutritional value.
389
00:15:01,400 --> 00:15:04,494
We want meatball subs.
You had no right to take ours.
390
00:15:05,070 --> 00:15:06,162
Screw this.
391
00:15:06,238 --> 00:15:09,366
I'll log those files
and teach the hazmat class,
392
00:15:09,441 --> 00:15:11,602
and I'll do everyone's work,
because apparently
393
00:15:11,677 --> 00:15:14,111
I am the only one keeping
this precinct together!
394
00:15:23,789 --> 00:15:25,723
Um, I think you closed
the door too hard.
395
00:15:27,259 --> 00:15:29,022
Hey, I found popsicles.
396
00:15:29,094 --> 00:15:30,857
These should
help cool us down.
397
00:15:31,497 --> 00:15:32,589
(GROANS)
398
00:15:33,299 --> 00:15:34,561
(SIGHS)
399
00:15:35,234 --> 00:15:37,600
(IN A FALSE VOICE) "Thanks,
Jake." You're welcome, nards.
400
00:15:37,670 --> 00:15:40,138
Peralta,
Balthazar has a sister.
401
00:15:40,205 --> 00:15:42,696
Meet... Penelope.
402
00:15:42,942 --> 00:15:44,842
Whoo, yeah, mumps on mumps.
403
00:15:44,977 --> 00:15:47,070
Let's not dwell on it.
We should get back to work.
404
00:15:47,146 --> 00:15:50,445
Or we could fall asleep for five
to seven days and see how we feel.
405
00:15:50,516 --> 00:15:52,484
I will not rest
till justice is served.
406
00:15:52,551 --> 00:15:53,575
There's no time to waste.
407
00:15:53,652 --> 00:15:54,812
This case is urgent.
408
00:15:55,587 --> 00:15:57,020
Oh, boy. (SIGHS)
409
00:15:57,089 --> 00:15:58,249
All right, listen.
410
00:15:58,424 --> 00:16:02,793
The case may not be quite
as urgent as once thought.
411
00:16:02,861 --> 00:16:04,021
Um...
412
00:16:04,797 --> 00:16:07,527
I dug it up out of my desk so you'd
have something to do on weekends
413
00:16:07,599 --> 00:16:08,861
because you seemed
so lonely.
414
00:16:08,934 --> 00:16:11,903
You cited chatter from the streets
that Garibaldi had resurfaced.
415
00:16:11,971 --> 00:16:13,131
I did. I did. I did.
416
00:16:13,205 --> 00:16:16,538
But said chatter
may have been fudged.
417
00:16:17,443 --> 00:16:18,910
So you lied to me?
418
00:16:19,778 --> 00:16:20,836
Out of pity.
You pitied me.
419
00:16:20,913 --> 00:16:22,608
I wouldn't put it that way.
I would.
420
00:16:22,681 --> 00:16:24,774
I am offended.
I am angry.
421
00:16:24,850 --> 00:16:26,317
I am very tired.
422
00:16:26,385 --> 00:16:28,979
So I'm gonna take a nap,
but when I wake up... Oh...
423
00:16:29,855 --> 00:16:31,686
You are in for it.
424
00:16:33,492 --> 00:16:35,153
How dare you?
425
00:16:35,561 --> 00:16:36,926
How dare me?
426
00:16:36,996 --> 00:16:38,827
How dare you?
427
00:16:39,398 --> 00:16:40,592
I was just trying to help.
428
00:16:40,666 --> 00:16:42,827
Oh, your help feels
an awful lot like pity,
429
00:16:42,901 --> 00:16:46,166
so do me a favor and don't
ever help me again.
430
00:16:46,238 --> 00:16:48,570
Well, well, you didn't seem
to mind me helping you
431
00:16:48,640 --> 00:16:51,575
when I got you your job
back at the Nine-Nine.
432
00:16:51,643 --> 00:16:54,134
I didn't ask you
to do that.
433
00:16:54,780 --> 00:16:55,838
(PERALTA GASPS)
434
00:16:55,914 --> 00:16:58,849
You said we were out
of peas, you pea hog!
435
00:16:58,917 --> 00:17:00,646
You're the pea hog!
You're the pea hog!
436
00:17:00,719 --> 00:17:01,981
No, you!
You take that back!
437
00:17:02,054 --> 00:17:04,386
You!
(BOTH YELL)
438
00:17:05,624 --> 00:17:06,818
Double poke!
439
00:17:06,892 --> 00:17:08,757
(GROANS)
(LAUGHS)
440
00:17:08,827 --> 00:17:10,624
(BOTH GRUNTING)
441
00:17:12,631 --> 00:17:14,565
BOTH: Gah!
442
00:17:15,901 --> 00:17:18,392
SANTIAGO: Okay,
hope you guys are hungry.
443
00:17:18,470 --> 00:17:19,835
Made baked ziti.
444
00:17:19,905 --> 00:17:24,171
Thought it would be fun to use
Garibaldi's ultra-authentic recipe.
445
00:17:24,243 --> 00:17:26,074
Oh, great, pity food.
446
00:17:26,145 --> 00:17:28,477
Thank you anyway,
but I can cook for myself.
447
00:17:28,547 --> 00:17:31,072
Wow, I would roll my
eyes so hard right now
448
00:17:31,150 --> 00:17:32,378
if it didn't make
my brain burn.
449
00:17:32,451 --> 00:17:34,817
Okay, Captain, this ends now.
450
00:17:34,887 --> 00:17:38,015
I know your pride is hurt, but
no one ever took pity on you.
451
00:17:38,090 --> 00:17:40,251
All we wanted to do was
help you when you were down
452
00:17:40,325 --> 00:17:42,657
because that's what people do
when they care about each other.
453
00:17:42,728 --> 00:17:44,457
They tell each
other lies and invent
454
00:17:44,530 --> 00:17:46,225
urgent mysteries
that need to be solved?
455
00:17:46,298 --> 00:17:49,290
Come up with excuses
to spend time together
456
00:17:49,368 --> 00:17:52,132
like trivia nights
or folk art festivals.
457
00:17:52,237 --> 00:17:55,400
Or working old-ass cases
with their mumpy boy, Jake.
458
00:17:55,474 --> 00:17:56,907
Back to you, Amy.
We're doing great.
459
00:17:56,975 --> 00:17:59,341
You're gonna eat this ziti, and
you're gonna appreciate it,
460
00:17:59,411 --> 00:18:00,810
and you're gonna
grow the hell up.
461
00:18:02,548 --> 00:18:04,880
Okay, you're right.
462
00:18:06,452 --> 00:18:07,851
I'm sorry for
the way I acted.
463
00:18:09,021 --> 00:18:10,545
I can't wait to
eat your food.
464
00:18:13,559 --> 00:18:14,583
Ugh.
465
00:18:14,660 --> 00:18:15,752
This is revolting.
466
00:18:16,028 --> 00:18:17,086
PERALTA: Wow.
467
00:18:17,296 --> 00:18:18,490
Have you learned nothing?
468
00:18:19,665 --> 00:18:20,757
Oh, God!
469
00:18:21,333 --> 00:18:22,766
That is worse
than the mumps, Amy.
470
00:18:22,835 --> 00:18:24,166
SANTIAGO: What the hell?
471
00:18:24,269 --> 00:18:26,567
I used Garibaldi's
exact recipe.
472
00:18:26,638 --> 00:18:27,662
I know I'm not a great cook,
473
00:18:27,739 --> 00:18:29,434
but I love
following instructions.
474
00:18:29,508 --> 00:18:30,941
Seven cups of salt?
475
00:18:31,009 --> 00:18:32,442
Even I know this
isn't a recipe.
476
00:18:32,945 --> 00:18:34,003
Which means it
might be a code.
477
00:18:34,213 --> 00:18:36,113
Ooh, interesting.
478
00:18:36,181 --> 00:18:38,308
Ten digits,
maybe it's a phone number.
479
00:18:38,383 --> 00:18:40,647
Look, 718,
Brooklyn area code.
480
00:18:40,719 --> 00:18:42,880
Yes, that's definitely it.
481
00:18:42,955 --> 00:18:46,948
Wait, did you actually use all of
this salt and 18 cups of oregano?
482
00:18:47,025 --> 00:18:48,549
Back off,
I solved the case.
483
00:18:48,660 --> 00:18:51,254
Nine onions? Oh, Amy.
484
00:18:51,330 --> 00:18:52,592
How am I the bad guy here?
485
00:18:55,434 --> 00:18:58,062
All right, all right.
Looks good.
486
00:18:58,137 --> 00:19:00,071
I can barely tell
you hulked out in here.
487
00:19:00,139 --> 00:19:02,004
Yeah, (SIGHS) but two
weeks in charge,
488
00:19:02,074 --> 00:19:04,235
and I didn't get
any of my goals accomplished.
489
00:19:04,343 --> 00:19:06,573
You got Hitchcock and Scully
off their hunger strike.
490
00:19:06,645 --> 00:19:08,545
I just threw a bunch
of popcorn on the floor.
491
00:19:08,614 --> 00:19:10,013
It wasn't that hard.
492
00:19:10,082 --> 00:19:11,379
Yeah, they're animals.
493
00:19:11,683 --> 00:19:14,516
Do you want to know why
the amazing Captain Holt
494
00:19:14,586 --> 00:19:16,645
has never gotten the
evidence room cleaned
495
00:19:16,722 --> 00:19:18,553
or done anything on your list?
Why?
496
00:19:18,624 --> 00:19:21,184
Because all day long
he's putting out fires.
497
00:19:21,260 --> 00:19:23,251
That's what a captain does.
Hmm.
498
00:19:23,328 --> 00:19:24,886
The only difference
between you and Holt
499
00:19:24,963 --> 00:19:29,366
is that he lacks the strength to close
a door so hard a room blows up.
500
00:19:29,434 --> 00:19:30,833
Thanks, Gina.
501
00:19:31,069 --> 00:19:32,536
Ah, you don't have
to thank me.
502
00:19:32,604 --> 00:19:35,573
All I did was be the only
person who believes in you.
503
00:19:35,641 --> 00:19:36,801
Don't lean against the door.
504
00:19:36,875 --> 00:19:39,002
Terry caused
structural damage.
505
00:19:39,645 --> 00:19:41,272
My God, you're strong.
506
00:19:42,281 --> 00:19:43,441
(SIGHS)
507
00:19:44,416 --> 00:19:45,974
Briefing room, now.
508
00:19:47,452 --> 00:19:49,943
I really don't feel like
having you yell at me anymore.
509
00:19:51,156 --> 00:19:52,214
What is this?
510
00:19:52,324 --> 00:19:54,019
It's a funeral for Jason.
511
00:19:54,326 --> 00:19:55,486
I want to say a few words.
512
00:20:01,033 --> 00:20:03,593
When Jason died seven days ago,
I didn't give a rat's ass.
513
00:20:03,669 --> 00:20:04,761
This is your speech?
514
00:20:04,836 --> 00:20:05,996
'Cause I didn't
understand why people
515
00:20:06,071 --> 00:20:07,732
care so much about
their dumb dogs...
516
00:20:07,806 --> 00:20:09,103
Until I got
a dumb dog myself.
517
00:20:12,344 --> 00:20:14,209
I've only had Arlo
for a day and a half,
518
00:20:14,279 --> 00:20:15,473
but if anything
happened to him,
519
00:20:15,547 --> 00:20:17,447
I would kill everyone
in this room and then myself.
520
00:20:17,816 --> 00:20:19,977
Very violent eulogy,
I like it.
521
00:20:20,052 --> 00:20:21,576
Charles, I'm sorry.
522
00:20:21,653 --> 00:20:23,450
You don't have to
get over it.
523
00:20:23,522 --> 00:20:24,614
Take as long as you want.
524
00:20:24,756 --> 00:20:26,280
Scully, it's time.
525
00:20:26,358 --> 00:20:31,193
♪ Ave Maria ♪
526
00:20:32,164 --> 00:20:33,495
HOLT: Okay, thank you.
527
00:20:33,599 --> 00:20:35,260
Good news, Garibaldi's phone
number's still active,
528
00:20:35,334 --> 00:20:36,392
so they were
able to locate him.
529
00:20:36,468 --> 00:20:38,333
SWAT just picked him up.
530
00:20:38,437 --> 00:20:40,405
So that's that.
Yeah, that's that.
531
00:20:40,505 --> 00:20:42,632
Perfect timing
as our quarantine
532
00:20:42,708 --> 00:20:44,369
has finally ended and
our goiters are gone.
533
00:20:44,443 --> 00:20:45,535
Yes, indeed.
534
00:20:45,611 --> 00:20:48,171
We're free to go outside and lick
whoever's eyeballs we'd like.
535
00:20:48,247 --> 00:20:50,010
Inaccurate, no one is
ever free to do that.
536
00:20:50,082 --> 00:20:51,174
Yeah, you're right.
537
00:20:51,250 --> 00:20:53,718
Anyhow, I am out.
538
00:20:53,785 --> 00:20:55,013
Uh, wait a minute.
539
00:20:56,321 --> 00:20:57,413
(INHALES)
540
00:20:57,723 --> 00:20:59,281
I'm sorry I yelled at you.
541
00:20:59,591 --> 00:21:02,458
I was too proud to
admit I was lonely.
542
00:21:02,728 --> 00:21:05,253
So, thank you.
543
00:21:05,430 --> 00:21:07,990
You're welcome.
Ain't no thang.
544
00:21:08,133 --> 00:21:10,192
No, it is a thang,
and an even bigger thang
545
00:21:10,269 --> 00:21:12,100
is that you brought me
back to the Nine-Nine,
546
00:21:12,170 --> 00:21:14,365
and I will always
be grateful for that.
547
00:21:14,439 --> 00:21:16,737
So, here.
548
00:21:18,877 --> 00:21:20,344
This is for you.
Ah.
549
00:21:21,146 --> 00:21:24,081
Oh, sour candies,
I missed you so much.
550
00:21:24,650 --> 00:21:25,742
Ah.
551
00:21:25,817 --> 00:21:27,409
(GROANS) It burns!
552
00:21:27,519 --> 00:21:30,079
(CRYING) Thank you
for this gift.
553
00:21:32,000 --> 00:21:37,000
Ripped & Corrected By mstoll