[footsteps rustling]
[solemn music]
This is the spot.
My daddy says they hung him down there by the river.
Skinned that old nigga, but he was still alive
When they hanged him.
Ain't no such thing as ghosts.
They say he hung there all night.
Cryin' till he died.
Look.
Shit, just an old rope.
Folks say you come down here at night,
You could still hear him cryin'.
[distant howling]
[howling]
[crow caws]
[both yelling]
[crow cawing]
[dramatic music]
Damn. I almost shit myself.
[chuckles] I did.
[both screaming]
♪
[dramatic percussive music]
♪
[siren wailing]
[car horn honking]
Hmm! [Sighs]
Oh, sheesh.
Oh.
Oh! Whoa!
Sorry, buddy.
Ah...
[shower running]
Hey.
Where you been?
I got you somethin'.
Mmm...
I was tired.
Slept in the truck awhile.
How'd you sleep?
Like a bear...
With a spring up his ass.
[sighs] - whoo!
Could you... Could you get dressed, man?
Put... put some clothes on?
Why? You excited?
No, I want to be out of here
Before the sunshine band wakes up.
We quittin'?
No, we... we got a bridge to find.
♪
Yes! [Chuckles]
Oh, hey.
Y'all going somewhere?
Doing what we came here to do,
Find that bridge.
Good, good. Take chub and paco with you.
- No. - We're good.
Glad to hear it.
Just let these boys get cleaned up.
And, uh, oh, had a great run.
Morning ritual, you know, you got to stay in shape.
I want some breakfast.
Yeah, Trudy's gonna make some eggs
Before you head out.
That girl can cook.
Right, hap?
Bad joke. I couldn't resist.
[chuckles] you know, we don't have
Room in here for four, so...
Oh, hey, well, take the Van.
Plenty of room.
I'm telling you right now...
That thing got a mattress and beaded curtains,
I'm walkin'.
[engine rumbling]
What do we got here?
Hell if I know.
[grunts]
[muttering indistinctly]
Glorious morning.
Heavens are tellin' of the glory of god.
Their expanse is declaring the work of his hands.
Meaning?
- Meaning he's the creator. - Oh.
And he's watching us...
Right now.
Hap, you see anybody?
- No. - Oh...
Just a cloud, and that looks like Willie Nelson.
Hey, you wouldn't happen to be lost, now, would you?
Just the opposite, brother.
I saw your entrance
And your, uh... Your lawn pieces,
Thought you might be in need of the holy spirit.
You blind? See them signs?
This is private property.
How the hell did you get past that gate?
It... it was open.
Afraid I didn't see any signs, sir.
Sorry.
My name's Prescott Jones,
And I sell the lord's word.
We're atheists.
Oh, well, too bad.
But I'm running a sale, friend.
You run it somewhere else.
We're busy, and I ain't your friend.
Right you are. Right you are.
I'll just leave this here then.
On the house.
[engine turns over]
I hate Bible thumpers!
You left that gate open, didn't you?
Yeah, yeah.
I won't tell if you won't.
Oh, no.
[gentle music]
♪
Just stay straight.
Trail's not far.
[police siren whooping]
[indistinct police radio transmission]
Ah, shit.
How about that way?
Yeah, it winds around.
Holy rollers, I get.
But you got a problem with the police too?
Something we should know about?
Did you ever hear of the mechanics?
Paco was with them.
Weren't they a splinter branch of the weathermen?
Protested 'nam, blew up buildings
And recruitin' stations?
People too, if I recall.
Something like that.
Well?
It looks right,
But it was a long time ago.
I just followed my dad.
I tell you...
I don't like these two clowns
Breathing down my neck.
Let's go.
How hard can it be to find a damn river?
Well, you tell me.
You and Howard couldn't find it.
Well, you know so much.
Which way?
I'm pretty sure they both lead down to the water, so...
Pretty sure?
Mm-hmm.
We could take 'em both.
[scoffs]
That's the first intelligent thing you've said.
Meet you there.
I don't think so.
You want that hand, I suggest
You keep it on a leash.
[chuckles]
You're with me, hap.
Who put you in charge?
No way in hell I'm going with chub.
You lead the way.
♪
So Trudy says you're a gay.
What's that like?
Let's try a version of this where you don't talk.
You don't act like any homosexuals that I know of.
You don't know any homosexuals.
I'm just saying, it's just rare to meet someone
Who's so comfortable in their own skin.
I mean, you're, like,
The first gay black man I've ever met.
One more word,
I'll be the last gay black man you ever met.
[wind howling]
Leonard?
[crow cawing]
Leonard?
Oh...
Come on, Leonard.
Leonard!
Tell me somethin'...
How does a man like you
Go from a group like the mechanics
To the Howard and Trudy show?
What do you mean, a man like me?
I know who you are.
You weren't just a member of the mechanics.
You were its leader...
The bomb maker who blew himself up.
I was young.
I stood up for somethin'.
Blind faith and a cause, huh?
Nobody said it was gonna be easy.
Some of us can stand the heat,
And some of us can't.
Besides, it ain't that bad, this face.
Only hurts when I smile.
[dogs barking, men speaking indistinctly]
[indistinct police radio transmission]
Was this place always so popular?
- Something about a dead cop. - [gasps]
Heard it back on the trail.
Where's chub?
Long story.
[jaunty acoustic music]
All right, one, two...
- Three. - Three.
[all grunting]
Pull!
[wailing]
[vine snaps, all grunting]
God damn it.
♪
Well, now what?
We got some rope in the Van.
Yeah.
♪
- Good? - Good.
You ready, chub?
Yeah.
One, two, three.
Pull!
All: Pull!
[mud splashing]
Shit!
[all sighing]
[coughing]
[all laughing]
Where are your pants?
[laughter]
[mellow country music playing]
♪
Trudy, you got customers waitin'.
Table two.
♪ Looks like it's gonna be
♪ one of those days
♪ if this is your way of getting me... ♪
Welcome to family burger, where everyone's family.
How can I help you?
Family...
Well, sister,
You can let me take you out dancing.
How about that?
You know,
My dance card's full this week,
But I can take your food order.
Oh...
Well, I guess I'll just have to
Give this menu another look, then.
[both chuckling]
Oops. Sorry about that.
That's very kind of you.
That's the least I could do.
Would you mind getting my lady friend here
One more steak, when you get a chance?
She has worked up quite an appetite.
Sure thing.
Just let me clean this up.
Of course.
And could you go ahead and make that real rare?
'Cause she likes it bloody
And bitin' back.
[pats booth]
[police sirens wailing]
[gravel crunching]
[engine puttering]
Oh...
Nobody come in,
'cause I'm taking a bubble bath.
I'm gonna hose off my coin purse.
Surprisingly big dick.
[both laughing]
I hope all this celebration means you found something.
[glass clinking]
Well...
Come on inside.
I made dinner.
Tell all about it.
My feet are killin' me.
Just in time.
Green beans in a garlic-chili sauce.
I hope it's not too spicy.
Ain't no such thing as too spicy.
It's tofu. You ever try it?
No.
Howard's a vegetarian.
That right? [Chuckles]
I didn't see that coming.
It's a personal choice.
Do you like it?
- Hap? - Hmm?
- The food. - Oh, yeah.
- Do you like it? - For beans.
So, uh, how about
You fill us in on your progress today?
Hmm, well, uh...
I wouldn't call it definitive.
You wouldn't?
No, it's more complicated.
Oh.
We found the road in,
Leading to the bridge.
Well, hey...
Well, that sounds hopeful.
It's pretty overgrown in there,
And the old trails are gone.
I'm pretty positive
That we're in the right area.
- You're pretty positive. - Mm-hmm.
Well, that's very encouraging, isn't it, Trudy?
Yeah, we'll go back out there tomorrow,
But like I said, the trails are old.
You guys had a big adventure today, huh?
- Just no bridge. - Hmm.
I can't say I'm not disappointed, after Trudy's
Enthusiastic endorsement
That you would be the one to find it.
Howard, give him a break. It's the first day.
I'll find it.
It's gonna be a little
Harder than I thought.
I mean, I'd hate to see you let her down.
I mean, she thinks
So highly of you.
Trudy's taste in men
Has always been questionable.
Maybe I should leave,
So you two can put your dicks on the table,
Next to them toothpicks.
- [laughing] - ooh...
[chuckles] she's right.
We're a team,
And we should act like one.
You don't find it, you don't find it.
You go home, we keep trying,
Because it's a matter of dedication.
Isn't it?
Chub, you're done eating.
Let's walk the perimeter.
I'll go with you.
What's the odds I'll find me a cheeseburger
Out there?
[chuckles]
[screen door slams shut]
Charming.
I can see why you married him.
I also divorced him.
It's my curse.
They can't all be you.
But he gets things done.
Of course he does, 'cause he's got...
What was that word he used?
Dedication.
That's a good thing.
Leonard's rubbing off on you.
He sees the world through dirty glasses.
Maybe the world is dirty.
Well...
A little optimism never hurt.
[solemn piano music]
♪
[cat meows]
[bottles clattering]
[hip-hop music playing]
♪
[dog barking]
[over radio] "radio mystery hour"
And a new Sherlock Holmes adventure.
And what new adventure are we to embark on tonight?
A macabre little escapade
From Holmes' and my early years
Entitled "the Dorchester demon."
It was in the year of 1887.
Holmes and I were retiring
Before the fire when he began...
"my dear fellow,
"life is infinitely stranger
"than anything which the mind of man could invent.
"here, an example from today's paper...
"a husband's cruelty to his wife.
"there's half a column of print,
"but I know without reading it
"that it is all perfectly familiar to me.
"there is, of course, the other woman,
"the drink, the push, the blow, the bruise,
"the sympathetic sister or landlady.
"the crudest of writers
Could invent nothing more crude."
Indeed, your example
Is an unfortunate one for your argument...
[labored breathing]
[panting]
[glass shatters]
The husband was a teetotaler,
And the conduct complained of
Was that he had drifted into the habit of
Winding up every meal by taking out
His false teeth and hurling them at his wife...
I'm really starting to like these people.
I hope they invite us back next year.
Yeah. [Chuckles]
It's pretty obvious they like you too.
I think that paco's got a thing for you.
[laughs]
Maybe you won't go home
Empty-handed from here after all.
Oh, yeah, his beauty's on the inside.
[chuckles]
See anything out there today looked familiar?
Maybe the road in does,
But after that, could be on Venus.
It's a friggin' river.
Uh-uh. Not a river.
It's a tributary to a river.
That's why Howard couldn't find it.
Well, aren't you the clever one?
Son of a bitch can cook, though.
Them string beans was good. [sighs]
Hmm.
[sighs]
[rock music]
♪
[air hissing]
[engine revs]
♪
Been chopping for hours now.
Where the hell we at, hap?
All I see is swamp.
Talk a good game back home.
Even had me fooled.
Ain't nobody tell me
I was gonna be on a redneck safari and shit,
Sleeping on the floor,
Hanging out with the last of the flower children.
Damn tacos done took our job at the rose field.
We ain't got squat.
Next thing you know, we gonna be working
At the McDonald's.
What you smiling at?
You either remember somethin', or you farted.
Don't tell me you farted.
We used to dig for night crawlers
Underneath that tree,
So gonna be an old sign over there,
Which means the iron bridge...
Is right here.
[chuckles]
[laughs]
I told you.
[mellow rock music]
Didn't I tell you?
Then where's the goddamn river?
Here you go, fellas, two more.
[country rock music playing]
[pool balls striking]
How does a river just disappear?
May be the wrong bridge.
No, no, it's the right bridge.
I know that much.
Probably some old, made-up, bullshit prison story anyway.
This softboy guy... Probably pulling Howard's crank.
Trudy bought it.
Of course you bought it.
If you believe that, then why are you here?
I'm here watchin' your ass.
Since when did my ass need watchin'?
Since always.
You act like it's the first time
I had to pull it out the fire.
Hell, I need oven mitts just to hang out with you.
Then don't.
'Cause I don't need a babysitter.
You know what the real question is?
What are you doing here?
♪
[sighs]
What's up?
Chester.
Got to go back.
Hmm.
[solemn music]
♪
Leonard.
Yeah?
I'm really sorry to hear about your uncle.
He's old.
Shit happens.
Still, it's got to be tough.
You take care of him
While I'm gone, now, won't you?
He's a grown man, last I looked.
More like a puppy dog.
Loves unconditionally.
You just the ball he keeps chasing into the street.
Don't let him be roadkill.
I'll make sure he gets his shots
And give him a bath before I give him back.
It's sweet, actually,
The way you pretend he needs you.
[footsteps thudding, door slams]
Hey, uh,
This is for gas.
You been holding out on me.
Look, we're still partners.
Whether you're here or not when we find it,
You still get your share.
I ain't gonna hold my breath.
Hmm... [chuckles]
Hey.
Come on, man!
That's why dudes don't hug each other.
Yeah, sorry.
Trudy, remember what I said.
[engine turns over]
What'd he say?
Nothin'.
Oh.
[country music playing]
♪
♪ I walk along
♪ the crowded street
♪ afraid your friends
♪ I'll chance to meet
♪ they know that I
♪ have caused you pain
♪ all I can do
♪ is hang my head in shame
♪
[elevator dings]
[over pa] Dr. McAllister, 472.
Dr. McAllister, 472, please.
Chester pine?
Hmm? Good?
Huh, Chester?
Okay.
Is it bad?
He's pretty out of it.
They got him on some heavy drugs.
I'm gonna leave you alone with him.
[over pa] Mrs. Wayman, can you come to admitting?
Mrs. Wayman, come to admitting, please.
[gurney rattling]
[solemn music]
♪
[blows landing]
♪
[breathing heavily]
[grunting]
[panting]
[crickets chirping]
[sighs]
Hey, cowboy.
Wanna take a ride?
Leonard took our horse.
[keys jingle]
Howard's saab.
Still got a copy of the keys.
Will he mind?
Of course.
Thank you.
Got these for your birthday last year,
Before we split up.
You might as well have them.
Happy birthday.
How's hap?
He's good.
And switch?
There's a little white hair in his face.
Guess we all gettin' older.
Not me, honey.
I refuse.
[country melody playing]
[sighs]
♪
♪ If ever you decide
♪ that you want me
♪ if ever you decide
♪ that you care
♪ well, I'll tell you
♪ where you can find me
♪ it's in the middle
♪ yes, in the middle
♪ of nowhere
♪ yes, I'm in the middle
♪ of nowhere
♪ and that's just the way
♪ that I feel
♪ I know
♪ there's no tomorrow ♪
We got married on that porch.
You had hair down to your shoulders.
That silly peasant shirt
You sewed flowers on.
I screwed up, hap.
Oh, come on, it wasn't that silly.
I mean it. In life.
I'm not perfect.
No. Mm...
No one said you had to be.
♪ That you just don't care
A phone call would've been nice.
♪ I know
♪ there's no tomorrow
I miss the way you used to be.
Always the noble one,
Ready to make a stand.
And now?
You just seem sad.
Like you missed your chance at the ring.
[sighs]
♪ And that's just the way I feel ♪
But if I'm right,
I think I can cheer you up.
Bring back a little of that old hap.
Right about what?
You'll see.
♪ Yes, in the middle
♪ of nowhere
♪ each time I tell you
♪ that I love you ♪
[passionate moaning]
♪ You tell me that you
♪ just don't care
Well, hot damn.
If it isn't the river.
So this is what I found out.
Howard did his research, all right,
But he missed one important thing.
What?
Enough time goes by,
Things change.
Look.
- Here's your bridge. - Mm-hmm.
Here's your tributary, where it should be...
Okay.
And here's what Howard missed.
20 years ago, the sabine flooded,
Along with half the county,
So severe it rearranged the river itself,
So the tributaries all shifted,
And a new river was created.
So that's why the bridge was over a dry gulch.
How'd you know all this? Library?
Bait shop.
That car could be anywhere.
Nope. The flood stopped at the old mill dam.
So there's a good chance that car's between the dry gulch
And in front of that dam.
That's less than a half mile to search.
Sounds ambitious.
A little ambition goes a long way.
You told me that once.
I did?
Yes, sir.
Now blow that up.
We're gonna do a little night fishing.
[chuckles]
[quiet piano music]
♪
Trudy?
♪
[flare hissing]
It's here, hap.
I can feel it.
How do you do that?
What?
Stay so hopeful.
You really just gonna take your money
And go when this is over?
That's your plan, huh?
You could come with me.
I'm sorry, Trudy.
I'm just not interested in the downtrodden anymore.
Hell, I'm one of 'em.
I feel sorry for you, hap.
You got nothing left inside to hold the dark away.
Yeah? Like what?
Howard and I were in Mexico about a year ago...
At this small orphanage,
Just an old monastery,
Bunch of nuns...
And all these children.
Dirt poor, hungry,
Some of them sick,
Yet they were still happy.
They had faith in something greater.
And?
I promised myself that one day,
I'd go back and change the world for those children.
That's what keeps me going.
Bet you think that's silly, don't you?
No.
No, I don't.
[water gurgles]
Hey, b-back up here. Back up, back up.
I think I got something here.
[reel clicking] oh!
[reel clicking]
Give me the line, give me the line.
Oh, my god.
We found it!
Hap, you found it. Oh! We found it!
[both laugh]
Ah! [Screams]
[screams] hap!
[alligator growls]
- Hey, let go. - [screaming]
- Breathe, breathe, come on! - [screaming]
[screaming] I got you, I got you.
[screaming]
Swim!
Swim to the side, swim to the side!
[dramatic music]
♪
Let's go. Come on, out of the water!
[panicked breathing]
Oh, god! [Crying]
Hey, hey, it's okay.
It's gone, it's gone. We're safe.
Hey, Trudy...
[gentle guitar music]
♪
[gasps]
[both panting]
Oh, god.
[cries out]
♪
Hap...
Yeah, I know.
I know.
[dramatic percussive music]
♪