1
00:00:03,802 --> 00:00:05,381
Dani, I can't find my...
2
00:00:05,382 --> 00:00:06,301
Keys? On the counter.
3
00:00:06,302 --> 00:00:07,381
Wallet? In the drawer.
4
00:00:07,382 --> 00:00:08,461
Self-reliance?
5
00:00:08,462 --> 00:00:10,091
Never seen it.
6
00:00:10,092 --> 00:00:11,671
All right, how do I look?
7
00:00:11,672 --> 00:00:13,131
I'm going for "ruggedly handsome"
8
00:00:13,132 --> 00:00:15,921
or "damn."
9
00:00:15,922 --> 00:00:17,761
Oh. Another date with Charlotte?
10
00:00:17,762 --> 00:00:19,381
You guys are like a little thing now.
11
00:00:19,382 --> 00:00:21,982
Yeah, I think tonight might
be the night we actually...
12
00:00:22,592 --> 00:00:25,131
...you know.
13
00:00:25,132 --> 00:00:26,555
I don't know. I don't want to know.
14
00:00:26,556 --> 00:00:27,461
I don't need to know.
15
00:00:27,462 --> 00:00:28,221
Sex.
16
00:00:28,222 --> 00:00:30,801
And now I know.
17
00:00:30,802 --> 00:00:32,562
Yeah, she just texted
me she's really excited
18
00:00:32,563 --> 00:00:34,302
about dinner tonight
but even more excited
19
00:00:34,303 --> 00:00:36,442
to go back to her place for dessert.
20
00:00:37,462 --> 00:00:38,482
Dessert.
21
00:00:39,842 --> 00:00:41,591
I get it, Oscar.
22
00:00:41,592 --> 00:00:43,442
Sex.
23
00:00:45,802 --> 00:00:49,461
You answer one job
listing on Craigslist...
24
00:00:49,462 --> 00:00:51,801
Oscar, are you finished with this
25
00:00:51,802 --> 00:00:54,091
half-eaten sandwich I
just found in the couch?
26
00:00:54,092 --> 00:00:56,341
Ham or peanut butter?
27
00:00:56,342 --> 00:00:57,881
Peanut butter.
28
00:00:57,882 --> 00:01:00,301
Still working on it.
29
00:01:00,302 --> 00:01:01,511
Hey, guys.
30
00:01:01,512 --> 00:01:02,381
OSCAR: Hey.
31
00:01:02,382 --> 00:01:03,381
Who's your friend?
32
00:01:03,382 --> 00:01:04,801
This is my dog, Biscuit.
33
00:01:04,802 --> 00:01:06,631
(chuckles) What is he doing here?
34
00:01:06,632 --> 00:01:08,801
I thought Brandon got
custody in the divorce.
35
00:01:08,802 --> 00:01:10,961
Oh, he did, but he's
in Somalia for a week
36
00:01:10,962 --> 00:01:13,551
airlifting food and water
to starving children.
37
00:01:13,552 --> 00:01:16,062
Oh. Sounds like a real jerk.
38
00:01:17,092 --> 00:01:18,801
Yeah, Brandon's fearless.
39
00:01:18,802 --> 00:01:20,905
You know, if you don't count
the fact that he told me
40
00:01:20,906 --> 00:01:24,426
that he was gay in a text,
followed by this emoji.
41
00:01:25,132 --> 00:01:26,261
(chuckles)
42
00:01:26,262 --> 00:01:27,341
Felix, come on.
43
00:01:27,342 --> 00:01:28,761
Come say hi to Biscuit.
44
00:01:28,762 --> 00:01:30,261
Okay. How do you do?
45
00:01:30,262 --> 00:01:30,887
(growls)
46
00:01:30,888 --> 00:01:31,612
Oh.
47
00:01:32,632 --> 00:01:33,881
That's weird.
48
00:01:33,882 --> 00:01:34,967
(growls)
49
00:01:34,968 --> 00:01:36,152
Biscuit!
50
00:01:38,262 --> 00:01:39,242
(growls)
51
00:01:39,243 --> 00:01:40,221
I am sorry, Felix.
52
00:01:40,222 --> 00:01:41,461
He doesn't usually do that.
53
00:01:41,462 --> 00:01:43,381
Oh, it's fine.
54
00:01:43,382 --> 00:01:45,801
I'm sure he's just skittish
around strangers, you know?
55
00:01:45,802 --> 00:01:47,841
Who's a good boy?
56
00:01:47,842 --> 00:01:51,091
Biscuit's a good boy.
57
00:01:51,092 --> 00:01:52,961
I hope he has all his shots.
58
00:01:52,962 --> 00:01:54,482
Oh, I do.
59
00:01:57,052 --> 00:01:59,051
You know what? He's had a long day.
60
00:01:59,052 --> 00:02:01,051
But I'm sure once he warms up to you,
61
00:02:01,052 --> 00:02:02,841
you guys are gonna be
the best of friends.
62
00:02:02,842 --> 00:02:04,761
I'm sure you're right. (chuckles)
63
00:02:04,762 --> 00:02:06,465
Okay, I'm gonna go get
him a bowl of water.
64
00:02:06,466 --> 00:02:07,652
Okay.
65
00:02:09,592 --> 00:02:10,942
(growls)
66
00:02:11,882 --> 00:02:14,221
(growls)
67
00:02:14,222 --> 00:02:16,562
(growling)
68
00:02:17,672 --> 00:02:21,011
(growling)
69
00:02:21,012 --> 00:02:23,152
♪ ♪
70
00:02:33,905 --> 00:02:40,505
Subtitle sync and corrections by
awaqeded for www.addic7ed.com.
71
00:02:41,012 --> 00:02:43,237
I just hate when a
restaurant makes you pick out
72
00:02:43,238 --> 00:02:44,177
your own lobster.
73
00:02:44,178 --> 00:02:45,341
You know what I do is
74
00:02:45,342 --> 00:02:47,011
I pick the lobster
that looks the meanest.
75
00:02:47,012 --> 00:02:49,801
That way I'm a hero to
all the other lobsters.
76
00:02:49,802 --> 00:02:51,301
(chuckles)
77
00:02:51,302 --> 00:02:53,341
Oh, was that too loud?
Is your son around?
78
00:02:53,342 --> 00:02:56,010
No, he's at his dad's
tonight. We have the place
79
00:02:56,011 --> 00:02:57,078
all to ourselves.
80
00:02:57,079 --> 00:02:58,011
Well, then allow me.
81
00:02:58,012 --> 00:02:59,822
Oh. (chuckles)
82
00:03:02,462 --> 00:03:05,461
Oh.
83
00:03:05,462 --> 00:03:07,131
You're giving me chills.
84
00:03:07,132 --> 00:03:11,381
There's more where that came from.
85
00:03:11,382 --> 00:03:13,381
Um, would you like a drink?
86
00:03:13,382 --> 00:03:16,381
I have milk, fruit
punch, squeezable yogurt.
87
00:03:16,382 --> 00:03:19,131
They all mix well with vodka.
88
00:03:19,132 --> 00:03:23,341
I was hoping we could
skip right to... dessert.
89
00:03:23,342 --> 00:03:25,341
Oh. I like the way you think.
90
00:03:25,342 --> 00:03:27,381
Give me a minute.
91
00:03:27,382 --> 00:03:29,902
I've got all night.
92
00:03:41,922 --> 00:03:43,801
How do you feel about whipped cream?
93
00:03:43,802 --> 00:03:45,801
Oh, yeah!
94
00:03:45,802 --> 00:03:49,039
I hope you're not disappointed.
95
00:03:49,040 --> 00:03:50,421
They got a little saggy.
96
00:03:50,422 --> 00:03:52,341
Well, let me be the judge of...
97
00:03:52,342 --> 00:03:56,341
You actually made dessert.
98
00:03:56,342 --> 00:03:58,711
Well, you said you like chocolate.
99
00:03:58,712 --> 00:04:00,540
I do.
100
00:04:00,541 --> 00:04:02,641
(chuckles)
101
00:04:05,541 --> 00:04:06,960
Now, where was I?
102
00:04:06,961 --> 00:04:08,276
I believe the back of your neck.
103
00:04:08,277 --> 00:04:09,590
Oh.
104
00:04:09,591 --> 00:04:12,061
Oh.
105
00:04:17,751 --> 00:04:21,170
Well, that was a fun night.
106
00:04:21,171 --> 00:04:22,290
"Was"?
107
00:04:22,291 --> 00:04:23,880
I should turn in early.
108
00:04:23,881 --> 00:04:27,090
I have an emergency
meeting in the morning.
109
00:04:27,091 --> 00:04:30,040
Symphony orchestras have emergencies?
110
00:04:30,041 --> 00:04:32,290
(chuckles) Yeah.
111
00:04:32,291 --> 00:04:35,290
The strings are high-strung,
the horn section is horny.
112
00:04:35,291 --> 00:04:37,351
It's a mess.
113
00:04:39,251 --> 00:04:41,000
Well, I...
114
00:04:41,001 --> 00:04:42,731
guess I'll go home then.
115
00:04:44,831 --> 00:04:46,830
Sounds good.
116
00:04:46,831 --> 00:04:48,601
I'll call you tomorrow.
117
00:04:54,041 --> 00:04:56,771
Well, at least my shoes
get to see her naked.
118
00:04:59,831 --> 00:05:01,420
Ooh, something smells good.
119
00:05:01,421 --> 00:05:03,170
What is it?
120
00:05:03,171 --> 00:05:04,460
Oscar, don't.
121
00:05:04,461 --> 00:05:06,101
It's dog food for Biscuit.
122
00:05:07,831 --> 00:05:09,534
You're actually
considering it, aren't you?
123
00:05:09,535 --> 00:05:11,135
I had a light lunch.
124
00:05:12,881 --> 00:05:15,330
Why are you doing all this?
125
00:05:15,331 --> 00:05:16,914
Well, Biscuit means the world to Emily,
126
00:05:16,915 --> 00:05:18,420
and Emily means the world to me.
127
00:05:18,421 --> 00:05:21,811
So I'm going to do whatever
it takes to bow-wow him.
128
00:05:23,131 --> 00:05:24,670
Well, let me know how it works.
129
00:05:24,671 --> 00:05:27,330
I may need you to cook
something to bow-wow Charlotte.
130
00:05:27,331 --> 00:05:29,790
What happened?
131
00:05:29,791 --> 00:05:31,290
Nothing! Nothing has happened.
132
00:05:31,291 --> 00:05:32,790
We've been going out for weeks,
133
00:05:32,791 --> 00:05:34,851
and she still doesn't
seem interested in...
134
00:05:35,461 --> 00:05:36,750
...you know.
135
00:05:36,751 --> 00:05:38,920
Sexual congress.
136
00:05:38,921 --> 00:05:41,021
You can make anything sound boring.
137
00:05:42,631 --> 00:05:44,290
I don't know what the problem is.
138
00:05:44,291 --> 00:05:46,710
Am I losing my touch?
I thought she liked me.
139
00:05:46,711 --> 00:05:48,330
I think that she does.
140
00:05:48,331 --> 00:05:50,000
And that's why she
wants to take it slow.
141
00:05:50,001 --> 00:05:51,540
And you should want that, too.
142
00:05:51,541 --> 00:05:53,710
Why?
143
00:05:53,711 --> 00:05:55,670
In the past, you've
always jumped into bed
144
00:05:55,671 --> 00:05:57,934
with women that you barely
knew. And what did it get you?
145
00:05:57,935 --> 00:05:59,000
Several thank yous.
146
00:05:59,001 --> 00:06:01,290
Countless high-fives.
147
00:06:01,291 --> 00:06:04,250
That's right, loneliness and regret.
148
00:06:04,251 --> 00:06:06,830
But now you have a chance
to build something real
149
00:06:06,831 --> 00:06:08,960
with a woman you seem
to genuinely care about.
150
00:06:08,961 --> 00:06:10,750
Yeah, I really do.
151
00:06:10,751 --> 00:06:12,791
So why don't you do something
different and hold off
152
00:06:12,792 --> 00:06:14,935
on the physical until you've
had a chance to establish
153
00:06:14,936 --> 00:06:16,790
a real emotional connection with her.
154
00:06:16,791 --> 00:06:17,920
Look at Emily and me.
155
00:06:17,921 --> 00:06:19,771
Yeah, that'll put me off sex.
156
00:06:21,461 --> 00:06:23,724
We were friends for an entire
year before we consummated.
157
00:06:23,725 --> 00:06:26,130
And now our relationship
is a model of perfection.
158
00:06:26,131 --> 00:06:29,710
You are cooking for her dog.
159
00:06:29,711 --> 00:06:32,130
Please. I'm just throwing
a little something together.
160
00:06:32,131 --> 00:06:34,271
Now, where is my caramelizing torch?
161
00:06:38,461 --> 00:06:40,380
Hi, Dani.
162
00:06:40,381 --> 00:06:41,670
Hey, Charlotte. How's it going?
163
00:06:41,671 --> 00:06:43,000
Good. Why?
164
00:06:43,001 --> 00:06:44,330
What have you heard?
165
00:06:44,331 --> 00:06:45,670
Has Oscar said something?
166
00:06:45,671 --> 00:06:48,420
No. What are you talking about?
167
00:06:48,421 --> 00:06:50,590
Well, I probably
shouldn't be talking to you
168
00:06:50,591 --> 00:06:52,000
about my, you know,
169
00:06:52,001 --> 00:06:53,504
physical relationship with your boss.
170
00:06:53,505 --> 00:06:55,040
(chuckles) And you'd be right.
171
00:06:55,041 --> 00:06:58,170
Check the box next to "Right you are."
172
00:06:58,171 --> 00:07:00,000
But who knows him better than you do?
173
00:07:00,001 --> 00:07:02,250
A lot of people. His
parents. His college friends.
174
00:07:02,251 --> 00:07:05,460
His bookie.
175
00:07:05,461 --> 00:07:07,710
It's just...
176
00:07:07,711 --> 00:07:10,290
I haven't been with a
man since my divorce.
177
00:07:10,291 --> 00:07:13,880
Or you could call a girlfriend
and grab a Chardonnay.
178
00:07:13,881 --> 00:07:16,290
And I know that Oscar is ready for sex.
179
00:07:16,291 --> 00:07:18,330
I'm just not sure I am.
180
00:07:18,331 --> 00:07:20,170
I've seen the kind of women he dates,
181
00:07:20,171 --> 00:07:23,590
with their 25-year-old
skin and their perky...
182
00:07:23,591 --> 00:07:24,841
everythings.
183
00:07:24,842 --> 00:07:26,090
(sighs)
184
00:07:26,091 --> 00:07:29,090
Oh, Charlotte, I hate to see
a good woman down on herself.
185
00:07:29,091 --> 00:07:32,090
Listen, you are gorgeous.
186
00:07:32,091 --> 00:07:34,250
And Oscar definitely thinks so, too.
187
00:07:34,251 --> 00:07:35,231
Really?
188
00:07:35,232 --> 00:07:36,210
Absolutely.
189
00:07:36,211 --> 00:07:38,601
He says inappropriate things
about you all the time.
190
00:07:39,671 --> 00:07:41,250
That's so sweet.
191
00:07:41,251 --> 00:07:42,830
(chuckles)
192
00:07:42,831 --> 00:07:44,894
You know, maybe I have been
overthinking this. Okay.
193
00:07:44,895 --> 00:07:45,880
Mm-hmm.
194
00:07:45,881 --> 00:07:47,264
Tonight's the night. Thanks, Dani.
195
00:07:47,265 --> 00:07:48,380
Oh. Okay.
196
00:07:48,381 --> 00:07:50,040
Yeah, yeah. You're welcome.
197
00:07:50,041 --> 00:07:52,064
Now, you just go on out
there and you get your man.
198
00:07:52,065 --> 00:07:54,585
And let's never, ever
talk like this again.
199
00:08:04,992 --> 00:08:07,121
Hey.
200
00:08:07,122 --> 00:08:08,701
Room service.
201
00:08:08,702 --> 00:08:10,201
A kiss for the lady.
202
00:08:10,202 --> 00:08:13,411
And for the gentle dog...
203
00:08:13,412 --> 00:08:15,411
a kibble casserole.
204
00:08:15,412 --> 00:08:17,361
(laughing): Oh.
205
00:08:17,362 --> 00:08:18,829
Wow, fancy.
206
00:08:18,830 --> 00:08:22,330
Biscuit, look who's here
with a special treat for you.
207
00:08:22,331 --> 00:08:24,960
There you go, young man.
208
00:08:24,961 --> 00:08:27,370
(chuckles) That, uh, might pair nicely
209
00:08:27,371 --> 00:08:28,750
with a slurp of toilet water.
210
00:08:28,751 --> 00:08:30,500
(chuckles)
211
00:08:30,501 --> 00:08:33,060
EMILY: Look, he likes it.
212
00:08:33,061 --> 00:08:34,060
(phone rings)
213
00:08:34,061 --> 00:08:35,770
Oh.
214
00:08:35,771 --> 00:08:36,930
Hey, Brandon.
215
00:08:36,931 --> 00:08:39,411
Biscuit's doing great.
216
00:08:40,141 --> 00:08:41,140
Yes, I read him
217
00:08:41,141 --> 00:08:44,730
all of the e-mails you sent.
218
00:08:44,731 --> 00:08:47,230
Well, you seemed to enjoy that.
219
00:08:47,231 --> 00:08:49,310
Does that make us friends now?
220
00:08:49,311 --> 00:08:50,571
(growls)
221
00:08:51,521 --> 00:08:53,270
Okay.
222
00:08:53,271 --> 00:08:55,020
You don't like me. That's fine.
223
00:08:55,021 --> 00:08:57,100
You're only here for five more days.
224
00:08:57,101 --> 00:08:58,850
And if you think I
don't know how to deal
225
00:08:58,851 --> 00:09:01,741
with an annoying roommate,
well, you are sorely mistaken.
226
00:09:02,641 --> 00:09:04,270
Felix, amazing news!
227
00:09:04,271 --> 00:09:06,680
They just offered Brandon
a permanent job in Somalia,
228
00:09:06,681 --> 00:09:07,810
and he's going to take it,
229
00:09:07,811 --> 00:09:10,100
which means I get to keep Biscuit!
230
00:09:10,101 --> 00:09:13,390
What?!
231
00:09:13,391 --> 00:09:16,850
And deny this pup an
enriching trip to Africa?
232
00:09:16,851 --> 00:09:20,470
I am gonna spend so much time with you.
233
00:09:20,471 --> 00:09:22,390
Oh. Except for tomorrow.
234
00:09:22,391 --> 00:09:24,230
I have to work a double shift.
235
00:09:24,231 --> 00:09:26,100
Would you mind watching him for me?
236
00:09:26,101 --> 00:09:27,230
(chuckling)
237
00:09:27,231 --> 00:09:29,730
Absolutely I would.
238
00:09:29,731 --> 00:09:31,180
Thank you.
239
00:09:31,181 --> 00:09:33,020
Oh, you hear that, Biscuit?
240
00:09:33,021 --> 00:09:36,180
You get to live with Mommy now.
241
00:09:36,181 --> 00:09:38,031
Oh, yes.
242
00:09:54,021 --> 00:09:56,230
Felix, why are you way over there?
243
00:09:56,231 --> 00:09:57,934
Shh. I'd tell you, but
Biscuit doesn't like
244
00:09:57,935 --> 00:09:59,365
when I talk during Scooby-Doo.
245
00:10:00,641 --> 00:10:02,680
That dog despises me.
246
00:10:02,681 --> 00:10:03,661
Aw. This little guy?
247
00:10:03,662 --> 00:10:04,640
Yeah.
248
00:10:04,641 --> 00:10:07,140
That vicious beast.
249
00:10:07,141 --> 00:10:09,140
He looks like he's giving out kisses.
250
00:10:09,141 --> 00:10:11,810
Are you giving out kisses? Huh?
251
00:10:11,811 --> 00:10:14,470
Oh, yes, he is. Yes, he
is. He's giving out kisses.
252
00:10:14,471 --> 00:10:17,020
Hey, Felix, come get yourself a kiss.
253
00:10:17,021 --> 00:10:19,430
The truth is...
254
00:10:19,431 --> 00:10:21,850
And this is embarrassing. I'm...
255
00:10:21,851 --> 00:10:23,850
I'm terrified of dogs.
256
00:10:23,851 --> 00:10:24,850
What?
257
00:10:24,851 --> 00:10:26,140
When I was a boy, my parents
258
00:10:26,141 --> 00:10:27,890
nicknamed me Felix the Cat.
259
00:10:27,891 --> 00:10:30,350
Creativity was not their strong suit.
260
00:10:30,351 --> 00:10:32,180
Anyway, one Halloween
I dressed up as him,
261
00:10:32,181 --> 00:10:33,781
and all the neighborhood dogs chased me,
262
00:10:33,782 --> 00:10:35,965
and I ended up hiding in a
tree and I had to be rescued
263
00:10:35,966 --> 00:10:38,465
by a kid dressed as a fireman.
264
00:10:39,101 --> 00:10:40,770
Does Emily know this?
265
00:10:40,771 --> 00:10:43,140
No. No, and I'm too
embarrassed to tell her.
266
00:10:43,141 --> 00:10:45,430
She called her ex the
bravest man she's ever known.
267
00:10:45,431 --> 00:10:47,680
And here I am, scared of a barking mop.
268
00:10:47,681 --> 00:10:51,140
Which is ironic, given
how much I love mops.
269
00:10:51,141 --> 00:10:53,640
Felix, you can't live in fear of dogs.
270
00:10:53,641 --> 00:10:56,310
You got to find a way
to assert your dominance.
271
00:10:56,311 --> 00:10:58,615
Does Biscuit play the Broadway
edition of Trivial Pursuit?
272
00:10:58,616 --> 00:11:00,506
'Cause I will crush him.
273
00:11:01,181 --> 00:11:02,600
Look, my kids have a dog.
274
00:11:02,601 --> 00:11:04,140
And the stupid thing just had puppies.
275
00:11:04,141 --> 00:11:05,964
So we took a class and
learned a bunch of ways
276
00:11:05,965 --> 00:11:08,520
to show a dog that
you're the boss. So try...
277
00:11:08,521 --> 00:11:10,310
putting your hand on his head.
278
00:11:10,311 --> 00:11:11,930
No, sir.
279
00:11:11,931 --> 00:11:14,850
His head is where he keeps his teeth.
280
00:11:14,851 --> 00:11:17,730
Then try making eye contact
with him, without looking away.
281
00:11:17,731 --> 00:11:19,520
That actually works?
282
00:11:19,521 --> 00:11:20,810
Hey, Teddy.
283
00:11:20,811 --> 00:11:21,810
Hey, buddy.
284
00:11:21,811 --> 00:11:23,520
Watch this. Hey, uh,
285
00:11:23,521 --> 00:11:25,560
I need you to do that
public appearance on Sunday.
286
00:11:25,561 --> 00:11:27,850
Oh, I told you on the phone,
I hate doing those things.
287
00:11:27,851 --> 00:11:30,470
Oscar, it would really help
me out if you did this for me.
288
00:11:30,471 --> 00:11:33,770
But Teddy...
289
00:11:33,771 --> 00:11:35,701
Eh, I'm free Sunday. Why not?
290
00:11:37,851 --> 00:11:40,390
All right, I'm gonna go
have dinner with Charlotte.
291
00:11:40,391 --> 00:11:42,430
And only dinner, right?
292
00:11:42,431 --> 00:11:44,100
Right.
293
00:11:44,101 --> 00:11:45,350
And if you start to waver,
294
00:11:45,351 --> 00:11:46,730
remember what we talked about.
295
00:11:46,731 --> 00:11:48,140
Yeah, I don't know.
296
00:11:48,141 --> 00:11:50,600
To make it great,
297
00:11:50,601 --> 00:11:52,741
you have to wait.
298
00:11:54,021 --> 00:11:55,491
Okay, I'm gonna wait.
299
00:11:57,351 --> 00:11:59,451
Sorry, pal, I tried.
300
00:12:02,931 --> 00:12:05,230
Don't think about sex.
Don't think about sex.
301
00:12:05,231 --> 00:12:06,680
Don't think about sex.
302
00:12:06,681 --> 00:12:08,230
So, what do you think?
303
00:12:08,231 --> 00:12:09,331
Sex.
304
00:12:11,231 --> 00:12:13,054
It's really cold out.
You should throw a long,
305
00:12:13,055 --> 00:12:16,730
baggy sweater over that.
306
00:12:16,731 --> 00:12:20,071
There are other ways to warm up.
307
00:12:21,271 --> 00:12:23,470
I cancelled our dinner reservation.
308
00:12:23,471 --> 00:12:25,640
I thought we could stay home instead.
309
00:12:25,641 --> 00:12:27,230
Oh, great.
310
00:12:27,231 --> 00:12:29,520
What'd you have in mind? Boggle?
311
00:12:29,521 --> 00:12:31,270
Parcheesi?
312
00:12:31,271 --> 00:12:33,060
Connect Four?
313
00:12:33,061 --> 00:12:35,680
How about connect two?
314
00:12:35,681 --> 00:12:37,560
Are we the two?
315
00:12:37,561 --> 00:12:39,430
Stop talking.
316
00:12:39,431 --> 00:12:41,930
But isn't talking the way
we learn about each other?
317
00:12:41,931 --> 00:12:44,020
Our hopes and dreams and what we want?
318
00:12:44,021 --> 00:12:45,230
I know what I want.
319
00:12:45,231 --> 00:12:47,230
Oh!
320
00:12:47,231 --> 00:12:49,371
Is it a pot of coffee?
'Cause I'll put one on.
321
00:12:58,681 --> 00:13:00,640
(exclaims) I can't do it.
322
00:13:00,641 --> 00:13:03,331
He's staring at me like
I'm a cat in a mailman suit.
323
00:13:05,601 --> 00:13:07,270
Well, there's a couple of
other things we could try.
324
00:13:07,271 --> 00:13:08,640
No, no, forget it. I give up.
325
00:13:08,641 --> 00:13:10,560
This stupid mutt is
never going to like me.
326
00:13:10,561 --> 00:13:11,730
Well, guess what, Biscuit?
327
00:13:11,731 --> 00:13:13,180
I don't like you either.
328
00:13:13,181 --> 00:13:14,600
You are not a good boy.
329
00:13:14,601 --> 00:13:16,403
You are a jerk and a bully,
330
00:13:16,404 --> 00:13:18,027
and I wish that you had never been born.
331
00:13:18,028 --> 00:13:20,430
Felix.
332
00:13:20,431 --> 00:13:22,781
Oh, hi. Uh, you're home early.
333
00:13:24,731 --> 00:13:27,430
You know, my grandpa used
to say you can learn a lot
334
00:13:27,431 --> 00:13:29,180
about a person by the
way he treats a dog.
335
00:13:29,181 --> 00:13:31,430
Which was weird, because
he never had a dog,
336
00:13:31,431 --> 00:13:33,850
he had a parakeet. He
was allergic to dogs.
337
00:13:33,851 --> 00:13:35,520
Well, and wheat, and Bartlett pears.
338
00:13:35,521 --> 00:13:37,100
Only Bartlett. What an odd guy.
339
00:13:37,101 --> 00:13:39,230
My point is... (sighs)
340
00:13:39,231 --> 00:13:41,991
I learned a lot about
you today, Felix Unger.
341
00:13:46,471 --> 00:13:48,734
My grandpa used to say you
can learn a lot about a person
342
00:13:48,735 --> 00:13:50,835
from the shape of their head.
343
00:13:52,681 --> 00:13:54,781
You're good.
344
00:13:56,971 --> 00:13:59,020
Hey, you know what might be a good idea?
345
00:13:59,021 --> 00:14:01,270
A nice, brisk walk.
346
00:14:01,271 --> 00:14:03,270
If it's exercise you're after...
347
00:14:03,271 --> 00:14:06,100
No thanks, I'm good.
348
00:14:06,101 --> 00:14:07,730
Oscar, what's going on?
349
00:14:07,731 --> 00:14:10,970
Nothing. Why?
350
00:14:10,971 --> 00:14:14,180
Just tell me... is there
something wrong with me?
351
00:14:14,181 --> 00:14:15,770
No. There's nothing wrong with you.
352
00:14:15,771 --> 00:14:17,350
Everything's right with you.
353
00:14:17,351 --> 00:14:20,930
Supple and good-smelling and right.
354
00:14:20,931 --> 00:14:23,270
I just think maybe we should wait.
355
00:14:23,271 --> 00:14:24,930
You do?
356
00:14:24,931 --> 00:14:27,571
Because I don't.
357
00:14:29,771 --> 00:14:32,281
Well, I did.
358
00:14:34,061 --> 00:14:36,871
Can't seem to remember why now.
359
00:14:42,101 --> 00:14:43,741
Take me.
360
00:14:49,771 --> 00:14:51,730
You said you weren't going to do this.
361
00:14:51,731 --> 00:14:53,600
Oh, my God!
362
00:14:53,601 --> 00:14:55,520
What? Are you okay?
363
00:14:55,521 --> 00:14:57,100
Yes, that was a...
364
00:14:57,101 --> 00:14:59,201
"you're so sexy" oh, my God.
365
00:15:03,561 --> 00:15:05,770
To make it great, you have to wait.
366
00:15:05,771 --> 00:15:08,350
No, no, no!
367
00:15:08,351 --> 00:15:09,430
What is going on?
368
00:15:09,431 --> 00:15:10,810
I'm sorry. Felix's dog
369
00:15:10,811 --> 00:15:12,560
left the...
370
00:15:12,561 --> 00:15:14,871
oven on.
371
00:15:16,521 --> 00:15:19,241
Damn it, I'm running out of shoes.
372
00:15:30,366 --> 00:15:32,150
Oscar. How did it go with Charlotte?
373
00:15:32,151 --> 00:15:34,460
You should know... you were there.
374
00:15:35,346 --> 00:15:37,225
What are you talking about?
375
00:15:37,226 --> 00:15:39,595
I don't know. Suddenly,
she did want to have sex
376
00:15:39,596 --> 00:15:41,885
and so did I, but then
you were in my head
377
00:15:41,886 --> 00:15:44,805
telling me not to have sex, so I just...
378
00:15:44,806 --> 00:15:47,305
I just ran away.
379
00:15:47,306 --> 00:15:49,265
You didn't talk to her?
380
00:15:49,266 --> 00:15:51,265
No. That would have
been weird and awkward.
381
00:15:51,266 --> 00:15:53,026
Well, maybe so, but it
would have brought you
382
00:15:53,027 --> 00:15:54,356
closer together. This
is exactly the kind
383
00:15:54,357 --> 00:15:56,145
of intimacy that you have been avoiding.
384
00:15:56,146 --> 00:15:57,729
Well, see? Now you're even avoiding me.
385
00:15:57,730 --> 00:15:59,830
I've seen enough of your face!
386
00:16:02,976 --> 00:16:05,015
Oh, Teddy, you're here.
387
00:16:05,016 --> 00:16:06,435
Yup. You ready?
388
00:16:06,436 --> 00:16:07,856
I'm not gonna lie. I'm terrified.
389
00:16:11,686 --> 00:16:13,975
Oh! Oh, God!
390
00:16:13,976 --> 00:16:16,616
Look at them. It's
worse than I imagined.
391
00:16:18,556 --> 00:16:20,225
You don't have to do this, man.
392
00:16:20,226 --> 00:16:22,225
No. No, the only way to face my fear
393
00:16:22,226 --> 00:16:24,015
is just to confront it head-on.
394
00:16:24,016 --> 00:16:25,555
Immersion therapy.
395
00:16:25,556 --> 00:16:27,656
Okay.
396
00:16:29,476 --> 00:16:31,576
(whimpers)
397
00:16:32,646 --> 00:16:34,826
Release the hounds.
398
00:16:37,846 --> 00:16:41,185
Oh! Oh!
399
00:16:41,186 --> 00:16:43,885
Oh! Oh, they're so warm and fluffy!
400
00:16:43,886 --> 00:16:45,935
Oh, and he's licking me.
401
00:16:45,936 --> 00:16:48,486
He's licking me!
402
00:16:50,766 --> 00:16:53,055
Stuff like this surprise you anymore?
403
00:16:53,056 --> 00:16:54,765
Not really.
404
00:16:54,766 --> 00:16:56,185
Hey, you know what? We-we
shouldn't have done them
405
00:16:56,186 --> 00:16:57,729
all at once. I changed my mind, Teddy.
406
00:16:57,730 --> 00:16:59,265
I want to get out. I want to get out.
407
00:16:59,266 --> 00:17:01,265
Nuh-uh. Stay in the pool, you baby.
408
00:17:01,266 --> 00:17:03,645
Felix, you should see yourself.
409
00:17:03,646 --> 00:17:05,345
You look ridiculous.
410
00:17:05,346 --> 00:17:07,515
Yeah? Oh, well, at least
I'm facing my fears.
411
00:17:07,516 --> 00:17:09,739
Instead of you, who ran away
from an honest conversation
412
00:17:09,740 --> 00:17:10,960
with your girlfriend.
413
00:17:11,766 --> 00:17:14,015
You know what? You're right.
414
00:17:14,016 --> 00:17:16,475
I'll see you guys.
415
00:17:16,476 --> 00:17:18,555
Puppy breath. Puppy breath.
416
00:17:18,556 --> 00:17:20,805
(phone rings)
417
00:17:20,806 --> 00:17:22,225
Hello.
418
00:17:22,226 --> 00:17:24,305
Yeah, they're still
available for adoption.
419
00:17:24,306 --> 00:17:28,225
Hey, if you take all six,
I'll throw in a kiddie pool.
420
00:17:28,226 --> 00:17:31,446
Teddy, I got your text.
What did you want me to...
421
00:17:32,976 --> 00:17:33,871
Felix?
422
00:17:33,872 --> 00:17:34,765
Oh, Emily.
423
00:17:34,766 --> 00:17:36,185
Hi, I was just, um,
424
00:17:36,186 --> 00:17:37,969
trying to find some,
uh, friends for Biscuit.
425
00:17:37,970 --> 00:17:39,435
Aren't they adorable?
426
00:17:39,436 --> 00:17:42,845
With their little licky tongues
and their exposed bottoms?
427
00:17:42,846 --> 00:17:45,265
You're trying to find a friend
428
00:17:45,266 --> 00:17:47,015
for a dog that you hate?
429
00:17:47,016 --> 00:17:48,765
I don't hate Biscuit, okay?
430
00:17:48,766 --> 00:17:50,515
I'm afraid of him.
431
00:17:50,516 --> 00:17:52,739
I'm afraid of all dogs,
including these little monsters.
432
00:17:52,740 --> 00:17:55,765
But... I'm trying to overcome my fears.
433
00:17:55,766 --> 00:17:59,095
Felix, that's so brave.
434
00:17:59,096 --> 00:18:01,475
As brave as Brandon, the
bravest man you've ever known?
435
00:18:01,476 --> 00:18:03,305
I said that he was fearless.
436
00:18:03,306 --> 00:18:05,805
You're brave because you
actually do have a fear,
437
00:18:05,806 --> 00:18:07,265
and you're trying to conquer it.
438
00:18:07,266 --> 00:18:10,145
And you're doing it for me.
439
00:18:10,146 --> 00:18:11,845
I am, aren't I?
440
00:18:11,846 --> 00:18:13,975
Absolutely.
441
00:18:13,976 --> 00:18:16,305
Do you mind if I join you?
442
00:18:16,306 --> 00:18:18,475
Oh, please.
443
00:18:18,476 --> 00:18:20,576
Plenty of pinkeye to go around in here.
444
00:18:25,346 --> 00:18:27,015
Oh, hi.
445
00:18:27,016 --> 00:18:29,998
Sorry I'm such a mess.
Not that it matters,
446
00:18:29,999 --> 00:18:32,328
since you're clearly
not attracted to me.
447
00:18:32,329 --> 00:18:34,328
Was it the kissing you
448
00:18:34,329 --> 00:18:37,788
then running out of the room screaming?
449
00:18:37,789 --> 00:18:40,368
That was a hint.
450
00:18:40,369 --> 00:18:42,152
By the way, if you're
looking for your shoes,
451
00:18:42,153 --> 00:18:43,078
I dropped them off.
452
00:18:43,079 --> 00:18:44,204
Oh, thanks.
453
00:18:44,205 --> 00:18:45,328
My balcony.
454
00:18:45,329 --> 00:18:48,288
Listen, Charlotte, I'm sorry.
455
00:18:48,289 --> 00:18:50,658
I was talking to Felix
and he made me realize
456
00:18:50,659 --> 00:18:53,118
if I wanted this to last,
then I should hold off
457
00:18:53,119 --> 00:18:55,658
on being physical until we're closer.
458
00:18:55,659 --> 00:18:58,078
Really? 'Cause I talked to Dani,
459
00:18:58,079 --> 00:18:59,788
and she said we should have sex.
460
00:18:59,789 --> 00:19:02,259
Remind me to give Dani a raise.
461
00:19:04,539 --> 00:19:06,748
Well, now I understand
why you left like that.
462
00:19:06,749 --> 00:19:08,408
Yeah, I was just trying to hold off
463
00:19:08,409 --> 00:19:11,578
until we had a real
emotional connection.
464
00:19:11,579 --> 00:19:13,998
Well, I'm glad you did.
465
00:19:13,999 --> 00:19:15,118
'Cause I like you, Oscar.
466
00:19:15,119 --> 00:19:17,679
I really want this to work.
467
00:19:20,459 --> 00:19:22,788
Am I wrong, or...
468
00:19:22,789 --> 00:19:25,679
are we getting emotionally
connected right now?
469
00:19:28,459 --> 00:19:30,908
Feels like we are, doesn't it?
470
00:19:30,909 --> 00:19:32,788
And if we're...
471
00:19:32,789 --> 00:19:36,368
emotionally connected, then we can...
472
00:19:36,369 --> 00:19:39,219
I think we have to.
473
00:19:46,329 --> 00:19:47,408
Everything okay?
474
00:19:47,409 --> 00:19:49,849
Yeah. Just making sure it's you.
475
00:19:52,289 --> 00:19:53,799
It is.
476
00:20:04,572 --> 00:20:06,981
Oscar, same clothes as last night?
477
00:20:06,982 --> 00:20:10,361
Is this what the kids
call the walk of shame?
478
00:20:10,362 --> 00:20:12,077
Oh, no, I did what you said.
479
00:20:12,078 --> 00:20:14,657
We talked, we connected,
we got really close.
480
00:20:14,658 --> 00:20:16,487
And then we, well...
481
00:20:16,488 --> 00:20:19,987
you know.
482
00:20:19,988 --> 00:20:22,197
Yes, we know. Sex.
483
00:20:22,198 --> 00:20:23,617
You had sex.
484
00:20:23,618 --> 00:20:26,077
You gave her the
business. You got it on.
485
00:20:26,078 --> 00:20:28,827
You made hot animal love
until the sun came up.
486
00:20:28,828 --> 00:20:30,928
We get it!
487
00:20:32,198 --> 00:20:35,048
Well, that was inappropriate.
488
00:20:36,328 --> 00:20:38,117
Oh, hey, Felix.
489
00:20:38,118 --> 00:20:39,947
Time to take Biscuit
for a walk in the park.
490
00:20:39,948 --> 00:20:41,947
Can't wait. Let me grab my coat.
491
00:20:41,948 --> 00:20:44,697
What's this? Are you
becoming a dog person now?
492
00:20:44,698 --> 00:20:47,827
Well, Emily is my gal,
and she loves her Biscuit,
493
00:20:47,828 --> 00:20:49,867
so there is nothing that
I wouldn't do for them.
494
00:20:49,868 --> 00:20:51,867
Aw.
495
00:20:51,868 --> 00:20:54,457
Oh Felix, we need a
plastic bag for his poop.
496
00:20:54,458 --> 00:20:55,585
Okay, have fun, you two.
497
00:20:59,155 --> 00:21:05,755
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