1 00:00:10,654 --> 00:00:13,888 Why, yes, this sandwich could use tomato. 2 00:00:13,890 --> 00:00:15,089 This is incredible. 3 00:00:15,091 --> 00:00:16,457 It's such a great deal. 4 00:00:16,459 --> 00:00:17,825 We should come here all the ti... 5 00:00:19,162 --> 00:00:20,762 There's a pube in my potato salad. 6 00:00:20,764 --> 00:00:22,063 Oh, weird. 7 00:00:22,065 --> 00:00:23,798 Nobody working here has pubes. 8 00:00:23,800 --> 00:00:25,300 Must be a customer's. 9 00:00:25,302 --> 00:00:26,601 I'm done. 10 00:00:26,603 --> 00:00:29,637 These onion rings look good. 11 00:00:35,412 --> 00:00:37,412 - Excuse me, ma'am? - Hmm? 12 00:00:37,414 --> 00:00:38,880 How do you get your butt to shake like that? 13 00:00:38,882 --> 00:00:41,382 Bend over and pretend you're using a jackhammer. 14 00:00:41,384 --> 00:00:42,884 Oooh, that's a good tip. 15 00:00:42,886 --> 00:00:44,052 I know. 16 00:00:44,054 --> 00:00:46,521 I'm not only a stripper, I also teach a strip class. 17 00:00:46,523 --> 00:00:48,156 - Where? - Right here. 18 00:00:48,158 --> 00:00:49,457 The owner wants to make some extra money 19 00:00:49,459 --> 00:00:50,658 during the daytime. 20 00:00:50,660 --> 00:00:52,226 Oh, is it like a pole dancing thing? 21 00:00:52,228 --> 00:00:53,461 I've always wanted to do that. 22 00:00:53,463 --> 00:00:56,831 Pole dancing, lap dancing, floor work. 23 00:00:56,833 --> 00:00:59,334 It's really a holistic approach to stripping. 24 00:00:59,336 --> 00:01:01,069 Eh, not for me. 25 00:01:01,071 --> 00:01:01,970 First one's free. 26 00:01:01,972 --> 00:01:03,171 Ooh, I'm in. 27 00:01:03,173 --> 00:01:07,406 Synced and corrected by MasterCookie - www.addic7ed.com - 28 00:01:11,715 --> 00:01:13,781 Are you going to go to pole dancing class tomorrow? 29 00:01:13,783 --> 00:01:15,650 I wish, but I have to get down to the flower market 30 00:01:15,652 --> 00:01:18,753 to get the exact color of freesia that Gemma wants. 31 00:01:18,755 --> 00:01:20,488 Oh, did you get the stationary for the name cards? 32 00:01:20,490 --> 00:01:21,689 I did one better. 33 00:01:21,691 --> 00:01:25,159 I got post-its. Way cheaper. 34 00:01:25,161 --> 00:01:26,728 What? They serve the same function. 35 00:01:26,730 --> 00:01:27,628 They're pink. 36 00:01:27,630 --> 00:01:28,763 Gemma asked us to do this together. 37 00:01:28,765 --> 00:01:31,232 And I feel like I'm doing all the work. 38 00:01:31,234 --> 00:01:32,266 Fair. 39 00:01:32,268 --> 00:01:33,534 I'll get the dick ice molds. 40 00:01:33,536 --> 00:01:35,203 Do we want minis or XXLs? 41 00:01:35,205 --> 00:01:37,472 You know, if we get the XXLs, we gotta start freezing 'em now. 42 00:01:37,474 --> 00:01:38,873 That's a lot of water. 43 00:01:38,875 --> 00:01:40,608 If it were up to me, it would be all dick ice. 44 00:01:40,610 --> 00:01:41,976 But Gemma wants this bridal shower 45 00:01:41,978 --> 00:01:43,044 to be a certain way. 46 00:01:43,046 --> 00:01:44,545 Okay, yeah. We'll get vodka. 47 00:01:44,547 --> 00:01:45,646 How many handles should I get? 48 00:01:45,648 --> 00:01:47,415 Zero. Gemma wants mimosa. 49 00:01:47,417 --> 00:01:49,851 Uh. It takes me like ten of those to get buzzed. 50 00:01:49,853 --> 00:01:52,020 Gemma expects everyone to get bridal shower buzzed. 51 00:01:52,022 --> 00:01:52,754 What's that? 52 00:01:52,756 --> 00:01:54,155 You could pass a breathalyzer. 53 00:01:54,157 --> 00:01:56,124 Ah! That's not a party. 54 00:01:56,126 --> 00:01:58,826 You're good at planning parties that are like parties. 55 00:01:58,828 --> 00:02:02,096 You know, drunk people, dancing, nudity. 56 00:02:02,098 --> 00:02:03,498 Oooh, thank you very much. 57 00:02:03,500 --> 00:02:05,299 But this is a grown-up party. 58 00:02:05,301 --> 00:02:07,035 And what? You're some kinda expert? 59 00:02:07,037 --> 00:02:09,537 Well, I did go to a Young Professionals mixer. 60 00:02:09,539 --> 00:02:10,805 Yeah, okay, when? 61 00:02:10,807 --> 00:02:12,874 Last week at the Burbank Airport Marriott. 62 00:02:12,876 --> 00:02:13,841 Whatever. 63 00:02:13,843 --> 00:02:15,676 You know I was friends with Gemma first. 64 00:02:15,678 --> 00:02:18,546 Yeah, but she and I are closer. 65 00:02:18,548 --> 00:02:20,848 Okay. All right, I hope you have 66 00:02:20,850 --> 00:02:24,218 a really good time with your new best friend Gemma. 67 00:02:24,220 --> 00:02:25,653 I hope you two scissor all day long 68 00:02:25,655 --> 00:02:27,922 while you look at champagne toots. 69 00:02:27,924 --> 00:02:30,058 They're flutes, Nicole. And you know that. 70 00:02:30,060 --> 00:02:31,392 No, I don't! 71 00:02:35,165 --> 00:02:37,031 Very enthusiastic. 72 00:02:37,033 --> 00:02:39,400 Good job, Denise. 73 00:02:39,402 --> 00:02:41,069 Gina, look how Nicole's doing it. 74 00:02:41,071 --> 00:02:42,570 I believe in you, Gina! 75 00:02:42,572 --> 00:02:45,473 Stick that butt out, Armando. 76 00:02:45,475 --> 00:02:47,642 All right, everyone, you've learned how to pop it. 77 00:02:47,644 --> 00:02:50,478 Now we're gonna learn how to drop it. 78 00:02:50,480 --> 00:02:53,081 Nicole, what does the song say you're supposed to do? 79 00:02:53,083 --> 00:02:54,282 Drop it to the floor. 80 00:02:54,284 --> 00:02:55,850 Mm-hmm. And where are you dropping it? 81 00:02:55,852 --> 00:02:57,952 Slightly above the floor, because my back hurts. 82 00:02:57,954 --> 00:02:58,920 Lower. 83 00:03:00,156 --> 00:03:02,623 Lower. 84 00:03:03,960 --> 00:03:05,927 Ah! 85 00:03:07,063 --> 00:03:08,496 Thank you! 86 00:03:12,502 --> 00:03:14,135 I like your moves. 87 00:03:14,137 --> 00:03:15,536 Uh, and I like what I'm seeing 88 00:03:15,538 --> 00:03:17,538 poking through them shorts. 89 00:03:17,540 --> 00:03:19,540 Thank you. I'm Kyle. 90 00:03:19,542 --> 00:03:21,275 I'm Nicole. 91 00:03:21,277 --> 00:03:23,544 I was wondering if you would like to get a cup of coffee. 92 00:03:23,546 --> 00:03:26,347 Well, stop wondering. I'd love to. 93 00:03:26,349 --> 00:03:28,282 I spent two years at a shady acting school. 94 00:03:28,284 --> 00:03:29,650 And then I dropped out, 95 00:03:29,652 --> 00:03:31,285 and then I moved here from Jersey with my best friend. 96 00:03:31,287 --> 00:03:32,420 - Oh, so you're an actress? - Mm-hmm. 97 00:03:32,422 --> 00:03:33,387 Have you ever seen "The Hunger Games"? 98 00:03:33,389 --> 00:03:34,355 Yeah. 99 00:03:34,357 --> 00:03:35,490 I haven't. 100 00:03:35,492 --> 00:03:36,824 But I saw the commercial, and I was like, 101 00:03:36,826 --> 00:03:38,860 "That's definitely what I wanna be doing." 102 00:03:38,862 --> 00:03:39,961 So what do you do? 103 00:03:39,963 --> 00:03:42,663 I wanna be a stripper in a high-class club. 104 00:03:42,665 --> 00:03:44,198 It's just so hard to get noticed out here. 105 00:03:44,200 --> 00:03:47,401 I don't mean to sound stuck-up, but I'm an Omaha ten. 106 00:03:47,403 --> 00:03:49,470 In L.A., I'm like a four. 107 00:03:49,472 --> 00:03:51,272 Do not do that to yourself. 108 00:03:51,274 --> 00:03:52,707 You can do anything in L.A.! 109 00:03:52,709 --> 00:03:54,675 Well, technically, this is Van Nuys. 110 00:03:54,677 --> 00:03:57,478 But literally, anything is possible. 111 00:03:57,480 --> 00:03:59,547 One week, you could be a waitress. 112 00:03:59,549 --> 00:04:02,116 The next week, you could be working in a shoe store. 113 00:04:02,118 --> 00:04:03,184 Then what? 114 00:04:03,186 --> 00:04:04,852 Oh, I don't know. I haven't gotten there yet. 115 00:04:04,854 --> 00:04:06,120 - Oh. - But it'll be great. 116 00:04:06,122 --> 00:04:07,388 Wow. 117 00:04:07,390 --> 00:04:08,656 You really seem to know what you're doing. 118 00:04:08,658 --> 00:04:10,625 Thank you. I do. 119 00:04:10,627 --> 00:04:12,560 Would you mind watching my routine? 120 00:04:12,562 --> 00:04:13,528 Wait. 121 00:04:13,530 --> 00:04:14,762 You want my opinion? 122 00:04:14,764 --> 00:04:15,997 Yeah. 123 00:04:15,999 --> 00:04:17,365 I mean, maybe you could tell me what I'm doing wrong. 124 00:04:17,367 --> 00:04:18,933 You're not gonna just like ask for help 125 00:04:18,935 --> 00:04:21,369 and then tell me my suggestions are terrible? 126 00:04:21,371 --> 00:04:23,070 No. Why would I do that? That's crazy. 127 00:04:23,072 --> 00:04:24,172 That is crazy. 128 00:04:24,174 --> 00:04:25,139 You know what? 129 00:04:25,141 --> 00:04:26,207 Veronica's an idiot. 130 00:04:28,077 --> 00:04:29,076 Why are you up? 131 00:04:29,078 --> 00:04:30,978 It's bridal shower stuff. 132 00:04:30,980 --> 00:04:32,446 Mm. 133 00:04:32,448 --> 00:04:33,447 You've been at this all day. 134 00:04:33,449 --> 00:04:35,316 Can't Nicole do some of this? 135 00:04:35,318 --> 00:04:36,651 No. 136 00:04:36,653 --> 00:04:38,886 I've sort of taken over planning of the shower. 137 00:04:38,888 --> 00:04:41,055 Ah, Nicole doesn't wanna help. 138 00:04:41,057 --> 00:04:43,624 No, Raymond, she wants to help just way too much 139 00:04:43,626 --> 00:04:45,760 and in a very wrong direction, so... 140 00:04:45,762 --> 00:04:48,196 Yeah, I can imagine. 141 00:04:48,198 --> 00:04:51,465 Also, I'm kinda into this. 142 00:04:57,140 --> 00:04:58,039 Ah! 143 00:04:58,041 --> 00:04:59,774 How's that? 144 00:04:59,776 --> 00:05:00,908 I'll be straight with you. 145 00:05:00,910 --> 00:05:02,243 I'm disappointed. 146 00:05:02,245 --> 00:05:03,377 What's wrong? 147 00:05:03,379 --> 00:05:06,214 When I look at you, I see farm boy. 148 00:05:06,216 --> 00:05:07,248 Use it. 149 00:05:07,250 --> 00:05:08,950 Make me think of sex in a barn. 150 00:05:08,952 --> 00:05:10,117 Sex on some hay. 151 00:05:10,119 --> 00:05:11,219 Sex on a tractor. 152 00:05:11,221 --> 00:05:12,186 Sex on a cow. 153 00:05:12,188 --> 00:05:13,054 How do I do that? 154 00:05:13,056 --> 00:05:14,922 With one of those milk gallon hats. 155 00:05:14,924 --> 00:05:15,890 I don't know. 156 00:05:15,892 --> 00:05:18,092 Do that boot scootin' line dancing thing 157 00:05:18,094 --> 00:05:19,060 you people do. 158 00:05:19,062 --> 00:05:20,628 How do you know so much about this? 159 00:05:20,630 --> 00:05:22,763 Well, I am kind of a male strip club expert. 160 00:05:22,765 --> 00:05:24,432 All right, now...... 161 00:05:24,434 --> 00:05:26,367 we're gonna do this again. 162 00:05:26,369 --> 00:05:28,636 I want you to go into a prong. 163 00:05:28,638 --> 00:05:29,837 Into a snake bag. 164 00:05:29,839 --> 00:05:31,405 I want you to hit that six pack. 165 00:05:31,407 --> 00:05:32,740 Lift that head up high! 166 00:05:32,742 --> 00:05:34,508 Say hi with your hat. 167 00:05:34,510 --> 00:05:36,344 Okay, keep it classy but sexy. 168 00:05:36,346 --> 00:05:38,112 And lasso! Lasso! 169 00:05:38,114 --> 00:05:39,547 Into splits! Oh! 170 00:05:39,549 --> 00:05:42,350 Eh, okay, all right. 171 00:05:42,352 --> 00:05:44,652 You know what? We can work on that. 172 00:05:44,654 --> 00:05:46,320 Wow. 173 00:05:46,322 --> 00:05:47,255 You're so generous, Nicole. 174 00:05:47,257 --> 00:05:48,656 I am. 175 00:05:48,658 --> 00:05:50,658 See, that's what happens when people give me a chance. 176 00:05:50,660 --> 00:05:52,260 I surprise them. 177 00:05:52,262 --> 00:05:54,996 And that's how I know you, Kyle, are a good person. 178 00:05:54,998 --> 00:05:57,798 You accept my help without pushing me away 179 00:05:57,800 --> 00:05:59,734 like a child that thinks they know better. 180 00:05:59,736 --> 00:06:02,036 You're a really good person, too, Nicole. 181 00:06:02,038 --> 00:06:03,537 And you've been so patient with me. 182 00:06:03,539 --> 00:06:05,873 Thanks. I try. 183 00:06:07,543 --> 00:06:09,176 Mm, mm. 184 00:06:09,178 --> 00:06:10,711 Hmm-mm, hmm-mm, no, no. 185 00:06:10,713 --> 00:06:12,580 Truly, I would love to. 186 00:06:12,582 --> 00:06:15,116 I need you to keep that sexual energy. 187 00:06:15,118 --> 00:06:16,117 No sex. 188 00:06:16,119 --> 00:06:17,485 No more jerking. 189 00:06:17,487 --> 00:06:20,187 Ladies love working with a full pouch. 190 00:06:20,189 --> 00:06:21,289 Okay. 191 00:06:21,291 --> 00:06:22,590 Whatever it takes. 192 00:06:22,592 --> 00:06:24,025 All right, well, if it makes you feel any better, 193 00:06:24,027 --> 00:06:26,294 I will probably rub one out to you tonight. 194 00:06:32,568 --> 00:06:34,001 Hi, hi, hi. 195 00:06:34,003 --> 00:06:35,036 Hey, Nicole. 196 00:06:35,038 --> 00:06:37,305 Dang! 197 00:06:37,307 --> 00:06:38,673 It looks good in here. 198 00:06:38,675 --> 00:06:39,573 I love it. 199 00:06:39,575 --> 00:06:40,608 Thanks. 200 00:06:40,610 --> 00:06:41,609 I just wanted everything 201 00:06:41,611 --> 00:06:43,311 to look really nice for tomorrow. 202 00:06:43,313 --> 00:06:44,612 Kinda surprised myself. 203 00:06:46,015 --> 00:06:48,282 Oh hey, can you finish with those raffia bows? 204 00:06:48,284 --> 00:06:50,084 Oh, yeah. 205 00:06:50,086 --> 00:06:52,586 Hey, listen, I was talking to my intern, 206 00:06:52,588 --> 00:06:55,589 and I'm very sorry about getting heated yesterday. 207 00:06:55,591 --> 00:06:56,590 That's not who I am. 208 00:06:56,592 --> 00:06:57,692 Intern? 209 00:06:57,694 --> 00:06:58,726 Whatever. 210 00:06:58,728 --> 00:06:59,760 It's a long story. 211 00:06:59,762 --> 00:07:02,496 Anyway, I am sorry. 212 00:07:02,498 --> 00:07:03,564 Don't worry about it. 213 00:07:03,566 --> 00:07:05,633 I have a gift for you. 214 00:07:05,635 --> 00:07:07,068 I asked the lady at the vintage store 215 00:07:07,070 --> 00:07:08,669 for the classiest thing they had. 216 00:07:08,671 --> 00:07:11,272 Oh, cocktail umbrellas. 217 00:07:11,274 --> 00:07:12,206 Thank you. 218 00:07:12,208 --> 00:07:13,207 These are great. 219 00:07:13,209 --> 00:07:14,342 You're welcome. 220 00:07:14,344 --> 00:07:15,476 Do you need any help? 221 00:07:15,478 --> 00:07:16,544 I think we're good. 222 00:07:16,546 --> 00:07:18,612 Come on, I've got lots of great ideas 223 00:07:18,614 --> 00:07:21,148 that are just as classy as those umbrellas. 224 00:07:21,150 --> 00:07:22,817 Like what? 225 00:07:22,819 --> 00:07:28,756 Oh, you know, like a Pinterest-y... uh... cup, 226 00:07:28,758 --> 00:07:32,993 you know, with little shellac buttons 227 00:07:32,995 --> 00:07:34,328 and jewelry. 228 00:07:34,330 --> 00:07:35,262 Honestly, I think we're good. 229 00:07:35,264 --> 00:07:37,098 We're almost done. 230 00:07:37,100 --> 00:07:39,967 Okay, well, let me hop back to my intern 231 00:07:39,969 --> 00:07:41,936 and do a performance review. 232 00:07:41,938 --> 00:07:44,205 You know, keep him on his toes. 233 00:07:44,207 --> 00:07:45,339 See you guys later. 234 00:07:45,341 --> 00:07:47,174 - Bye, Nicole. - Bye. 235 00:07:51,581 --> 00:07:52,847 Uh. 236 00:08:01,949 --> 00:08:03,415 "Magic Mike." 237 00:08:03,417 --> 00:08:05,550 "Magic Mike XXL." 238 00:08:05,552 --> 00:08:06,484 "Chocolate City." 239 00:08:06,486 --> 00:08:09,254 I've seen 'em all, and I've studied 'em. 240 00:08:09,256 --> 00:08:10,488 Da, da, da, da! Ow! 241 00:08:10,490 --> 00:08:11,923 Wha... what are you doing? 242 00:08:11,925 --> 00:08:13,191 You're off carbs. 243 00:08:13,193 --> 00:08:15,160 I need your body to get shredded. 244 00:08:15,162 --> 00:08:16,161 But I love bread. 245 00:08:16,163 --> 00:08:17,996 We all love bread. 246 00:08:17,998 --> 00:08:19,898 Bread is many people's favorite things. 247 00:08:19,900 --> 00:08:21,666 Oprah loves bread. 248 00:08:21,668 --> 00:08:24,803 But you can't eat bread and have a smokin' body. 249 00:08:24,805 --> 00:08:26,438 - Do you wanna strip or what? - Yes! 250 00:08:26,440 --> 00:08:27,939 Do you wanna strip re-e-e-al bad? 251 00:08:27,941 --> 00:08:28,974 Yes! 252 00:08:28,976 --> 00:08:30,108 All right then, let's do it! 253 00:08:30,110 --> 00:08:31,843 Let's do it! 254 00:08:31,845 --> 00:08:33,311 Why do I need the wheat? 255 00:08:33,313 --> 00:08:35,313 To tickle the ladies, duh. 256 00:08:35,315 --> 00:08:38,016 Come on, it's all part of the fantasy. 257 00:08:38,018 --> 00:08:39,017 I guess that makes sense. 258 00:08:39,019 --> 00:08:39,985 You don't guess. 259 00:08:39,987 --> 00:08:41,619 You know. 260 00:08:41,621 --> 00:08:42,721 - Ready? - Mmhmm. 261 00:08:42,723 --> 00:08:43,989 Go! 262 00:08:50,230 --> 00:08:54,666 Ooh, all right, let's see what's going on here. 263 00:08:54,668 --> 00:08:55,667 Okay. 264 00:08:55,669 --> 00:08:57,035 Yas, yas, yas, yas, yas, yas. 265 00:08:57,037 --> 00:08:58,503 Do you have to grope me every time? 266 00:08:58,505 --> 00:09:00,438 Yeah, how else will I know if that body's getting tight? 267 00:09:00,440 --> 00:09:01,639 Uh, uh, uh, uh. 268 00:09:01,641 --> 00:09:02,907 - Another lap. - But- 269 00:09:02,909 --> 00:09:03,842 You gonna sass me? 270 00:09:03,844 --> 00:09:05,543 Another lap. 271 00:09:05,545 --> 00:09:06,578 Go! 272 00:09:07,848 --> 00:09:09,681 Whoo, ah! 273 00:09:09,683 --> 00:09:10,982 Hot today. 274 00:09:21,228 --> 00:09:22,594 You ready? 275 00:09:22,596 --> 00:09:23,762 I forgot my wheat. 276 00:09:37,477 --> 00:09:38,676 Mm. 277 00:09:44,051 --> 00:09:45,083 Good. 278 00:09:45,085 --> 00:09:47,619 Not perfect, but good. 279 00:09:47,621 --> 00:09:50,588 Whoo, yah! 280 00:09:57,531 --> 00:09:59,330 Remember these? 281 00:10:00,500 --> 00:10:02,734 Yeah, trying to bring it back. 282 00:10:05,405 --> 00:10:07,138 I might not even go to that dumb party anyway. 283 00:10:07,140 --> 00:10:08,339 You have to go. 284 00:10:08,341 --> 00:10:10,241 You are the most fun person I've ever met. 285 00:10:10,243 --> 00:10:11,643 That party will be lame without you. 286 00:10:11,645 --> 00:10:12,877 It's already lame. 287 00:10:12,879 --> 00:10:14,079 Well, then imagine how much more lame it's gonna be 288 00:10:14,081 --> 00:10:15,180 if you're not there. 289 00:10:15,182 --> 00:10:16,815 Oh, you're so sweet, Kyle. 290 00:10:16,817 --> 00:10:18,817 You're the best. 291 00:10:18,819 --> 00:10:19,818 What's this? 292 00:10:19,820 --> 00:10:21,219 A celebration! 293 00:10:21,221 --> 00:10:23,721 I...got you an audition 294 00:10:23,723 --> 00:10:25,056 - at Men of Steel! - What? 295 00:10:25,058 --> 00:10:26,691 Make a wish! 296 00:10:26,693 --> 00:10:28,226 Uh... 297 00:10:28,228 --> 00:10:29,627 How'd you do this? 298 00:10:29,629 --> 00:10:31,863 I asked them to tape some candles to the bottles. 299 00:10:31,865 --> 00:10:33,264 No, the tryout. 300 00:10:33,266 --> 00:10:35,800 Oh, I went down there, and I apologized for my behavior 301 00:10:35,802 --> 00:10:37,535 at Sarah's bachelorette party. 302 00:10:37,537 --> 00:10:40,705 And I said, "I am not leaving until you get my boy Kyle 303 00:10:40,707 --> 00:10:41,773 an audition." 304 00:10:41,775 --> 00:10:42,774 And they said yes? 305 00:10:42,776 --> 00:10:43,875 Yeah, after I agreed to waitress for them 306 00:10:43,877 --> 00:10:45,110 for two weeks for free. 307 00:10:45,112 --> 00:10:46,845 But jokes on them. 308 00:10:46,847 --> 00:10:48,613 I'm very terrible at it. 309 00:10:48,615 --> 00:10:49,948 You are amazing. 310 00:10:50,884 --> 00:10:51,850 Cheers. 311 00:10:51,852 --> 00:10:53,284 Nope, nope. 312 00:10:53,286 --> 00:10:54,452 These are ceremonial. 313 00:10:54,454 --> 00:10:56,121 You're not allowed to have this. 314 00:10:56,123 --> 00:10:57,989 It's a bottle filled with carbs. 315 00:10:57,991 --> 00:10:59,624 Go get yourself a water. 316 00:10:59,626 --> 00:11:01,159 Go. High knees. 317 00:11:01,161 --> 00:11:02,627 Keep 'em high. 318 00:11:02,629 --> 00:11:07,132 Make sure your butt is nice, tight, and firm like a baby. 319 00:11:07,134 --> 00:11:09,434 Oooh, bad comparison. 320 00:11:16,309 --> 00:11:17,876 I don't know if I can thank you enough 321 00:11:17,878 --> 00:11:18,843 for this shower. 322 00:11:18,845 --> 00:11:20,378 It's so beautiful. 323 00:11:20,380 --> 00:11:23,381 And those Persian cucumbers that you curled, 324 00:11:23,383 --> 00:11:25,350 that must have taken forever. 325 00:11:25,352 --> 00:11:27,318 You were so specific about how you wanted them. 326 00:11:27,320 --> 00:11:28,887 I know. I'm crazy. 327 00:11:28,889 --> 00:11:30,121 No, oh my God, 328 00:11:30,123 --> 00:11:31,322 I loved getting all those emails from you. 329 00:11:31,324 --> 00:11:33,591 - Oh, good. - Yeah. 330 00:11:33,593 --> 00:11:34,559 Mm. 331 00:11:34,561 --> 00:11:35,727 Ooh. 332 00:11:35,729 --> 00:11:36,794 Ooh. 333 00:11:36,796 --> 00:11:39,597 Uh-oh, these do not taste good in my mouth. 334 00:11:39,599 --> 00:11:40,598 Ah. 335 00:11:47,874 --> 00:11:50,074 Uh, hell no. 336 00:11:50,076 --> 00:11:51,376 I'm about to Instagram the cupcakes. 337 00:11:51,378 --> 00:11:52,911 Is there any hashtag I should use? 338 00:11:52,913 --> 00:11:56,614 Please use #Gemmashowerpower or #preciousgems. 339 00:11:56,616 --> 00:11:58,583 - And that's G-E-M-S. - Thanks. 340 00:11:58,585 --> 00:12:00,285 Why the hell did you throw these away? 341 00:12:00,287 --> 00:12:01,352 Damnit. 342 00:12:01,354 --> 00:12:02,687 You were not supposed to see those. 343 00:12:02,689 --> 00:12:04,589 Yeah, well, I did. 344 00:12:04,591 --> 00:12:06,958 Why didn't you just tell me you hated them? 345 00:12:06,960 --> 00:12:09,727 Mean is throwing them in the garbage, Veronica. 346 00:12:09,729 --> 00:12:10,695 Veronica, 347 00:12:10,697 --> 00:12:13,498 I think we're running low on mini quiches. 348 00:12:13,500 --> 00:12:14,532 We'll talk about this later. 349 00:12:14,534 --> 00:12:15,633 No, we'll talk about this now. 350 00:12:15,635 --> 00:12:16,734 Crap. 351 00:12:16,736 --> 00:12:18,203 Hey, can I have one of those umbrellas? 352 00:12:18,205 --> 00:12:19,470 They've been in the garbage. 353 00:12:19,472 --> 00:12:21,506 Uh, I could use anything to liven up this party. 354 00:12:21,508 --> 00:12:22,740 I know, right? You know, 355 00:12:22,742 --> 00:12:24,309 I was supposed to plan this party with Veronica? 356 00:12:24,311 --> 00:12:25,510 What? That would have been fun. 357 00:12:25,512 --> 00:12:26,978 Yeah, well, she pushed me away. 358 00:12:26,980 --> 00:12:28,313 What a mistake. 359 00:12:28,315 --> 00:12:30,281 This could've been like Gal-entine's Day in Vegas, 360 00:12:30,283 --> 00:12:31,416 you know? 361 00:12:31,418 --> 00:12:32,684 All of us at the El Cortez. 362 00:12:32,686 --> 00:12:34,419 And then you got so drunk that you threw up, 363 00:12:34,421 --> 00:12:35,720 and then your nose started bleeding. 364 00:12:35,722 --> 00:12:38,122 And I was like, "Oh no, we're gonna have to a hospital. 365 00:12:38,124 --> 00:12:39,290 And none of us have insurance." 366 00:12:39,292 --> 00:12:40,758 I know. Yeah. 367 00:12:40,760 --> 00:12:42,627 And Veronica asked those finance douches 368 00:12:42,629 --> 00:12:44,128 to pay for all of our drinks. 369 00:12:44,130 --> 00:12:45,930 Idiots. 370 00:12:45,932 --> 00:12:47,265 Yeah, uh. 371 00:12:47,267 --> 00:12:49,067 And look at her now. 372 00:12:49,069 --> 00:12:51,836 All Gwyneth Paltrow, being all goopy. 373 00:12:51,838 --> 00:12:53,071 Ugh, I wish you'd planned this party. 374 00:12:53,073 --> 00:12:54,239 It would've been a lot more fun. 375 00:12:54,241 --> 00:12:55,807 Mm-hmm. 376 00:12:59,579 --> 00:13:00,511 Okay. 377 00:13:02,616 --> 00:13:06,384 Ooh, you guys, it's all your kisses. 378 00:13:07,454 --> 00:13:09,053 The purple one's mine. 379 00:13:09,055 --> 00:13:10,455 You like to be different. 380 00:13:10,457 --> 00:13:12,924 Ah, you're so cute. 381 00:13:14,427 --> 00:13:15,593 I got it. 382 00:13:19,699 --> 00:13:21,266 Howdy. 383 00:13:21,268 --> 00:13:22,300 Can you pretty ladies tell me 384 00:13:22,302 --> 00:13:24,302 how to get to a Greyhound bus station? 385 00:13:24,304 --> 00:13:27,572 Oh no, it's a lost country boy. 386 00:13:33,747 --> 00:13:35,179 Whoo! 387 00:13:35,181 --> 00:13:36,748 Yeah! 388 00:13:36,750 --> 00:13:38,216 Tamera! 389 00:13:38,218 --> 00:13:40,285 Tamera, no! 390 00:13:40,287 --> 00:13:41,719 Yes! 391 00:13:41,721 --> 00:13:42,720 Go all the way! 392 00:13:42,722 --> 00:13:44,689 Yes! 393 00:13:56,703 --> 00:13:57,802 I can't. 394 00:13:57,804 --> 00:13:59,337 - Yes, you can. - No, I can't do this! 395 00:13:59,339 --> 00:14:00,505 I can't do this! 396 00:14:03,343 --> 00:14:04,509 I'm still mad at you. 397 00:14:07,845 --> 00:14:09,278 I want that man out of my house. 398 00:14:09,280 --> 00:14:10,679 He's nervous. He'll come out when he's ready. 399 00:14:10,681 --> 00:14:12,214 - Nicole? - What was he supposed to do? 400 00:14:12,216 --> 00:14:13,282 Nobody was having any fun. 401 00:14:13,284 --> 00:14:14,316 Who wasn't having fun? 402 00:14:14,318 --> 00:14:16,018 Tamera, or Tamara. 403 00:14:16,020 --> 00:14:17,086 Who else wasn't having any fun? 404 00:14:17,088 --> 00:14:18,354 I don't know. 405 00:14:18,356 --> 00:14:19,688 I didn't talk to any of those other girls. 406 00:14:19,690 --> 00:14:20,689 Are you kidding me? 407 00:14:20,691 --> 00:14:22,525 One person is bored, and you call a stripper? 408 00:14:22,527 --> 00:14:23,559 Yes! 409 00:14:24,662 --> 00:14:26,495 God. 410 00:14:26,497 --> 00:14:28,230 Why didn't you let me help with anything? 411 00:14:28,232 --> 00:14:30,833 Because I wanted this to be sophisticated. 412 00:14:30,835 --> 00:14:32,168 I'm not sophisticated? 413 00:14:32,170 --> 00:14:33,469 I did not say that. 414 00:14:33,471 --> 00:14:35,671 But you did bring a stripper to a bridal shower. 415 00:14:35,673 --> 00:14:38,073 And I'm 100% sure that there's booze in your purse. 416 00:14:38,075 --> 00:14:39,909 I would never. 417 00:14:39,911 --> 00:14:42,111 And you need to stop acting like the boss of fanciness. 418 00:14:42,113 --> 00:14:43,946 You went to one mixer at a Marriott. 419 00:14:43,948 --> 00:14:45,214 That's one more than you've been to. 420 00:14:45,216 --> 00:14:47,450 Why are you proud of that? 421 00:14:47,452 --> 00:14:48,918 Is this what you want life to be? 422 00:14:48,920 --> 00:14:51,821 Like fancy napkins and tiny food? 423 00:14:51,823 --> 00:14:53,155 What happened to you? 424 00:14:53,157 --> 00:14:55,024 This does kinda suck. 425 00:14:55,026 --> 00:14:56,091 And that mixer sucked to. 426 00:14:56,093 --> 00:14:57,193 I bet. 427 00:14:57,195 --> 00:14:58,861 And all this was so much work. 428 00:14:58,863 --> 00:15:00,329 I'm so tired. 429 00:15:00,331 --> 00:15:02,131 I just wanna drink... a lot. 430 00:15:02,133 --> 00:15:03,132 I got you. 431 00:15:03,134 --> 00:15:04,300 I knew it. 432 00:15:07,271 --> 00:15:08,637 Thank you. I need this. 433 00:15:08,639 --> 00:15:10,105 You're welcome. 434 00:15:10,107 --> 00:15:11,607 Ooh, take it easy. Save some for me. 435 00:15:11,609 --> 00:15:13,576 Also, wait, that's straight vodka, my friend. 436 00:15:13,578 --> 00:15:15,344 Please, oh no. 437 00:15:15,346 --> 00:15:18,380 All right, I'm back. 438 00:15:18,382 --> 00:15:19,682 I will do damage control with the ladies. 439 00:15:19,684 --> 00:15:21,417 You get the stripper out of the bathroom. 440 00:15:21,419 --> 00:15:23,185 I have left over pills from my wisdom teeth surgery. 441 00:15:23,187 --> 00:15:24,153 And he can have one. Okay. 442 00:15:24,155 --> 00:15:25,154 - One. - One. 443 00:15:25,156 --> 00:15:26,222 - One. - Yes, one. 444 00:15:27,425 --> 00:15:28,757 - Can I come in? - No! 445 00:15:29,994 --> 00:15:32,495 I have a croissant. 446 00:15:32,497 --> 00:15:34,530 I'm gonna open the door a little. 447 00:15:34,532 --> 00:15:37,032 And you put the pastry through, then step away. 448 00:15:37,034 --> 00:15:37,900 Okay. 449 00:15:45,076 --> 00:15:46,976 Hey! Wha... aah! 450 00:15:46,978 --> 00:15:48,177 I told you were off carbs. 451 00:15:48,179 --> 00:15:49,945 You're still training. 452 00:15:49,947 --> 00:15:50,980 What is going on? 453 00:15:50,982 --> 00:15:51,981 Get back out there. 454 00:15:51,983 --> 00:15:53,082 You have a waiting audience. 455 00:15:53,084 --> 00:15:54,450 I'm not going back out there again. 456 00:15:54,452 --> 00:15:57,386 You can't give up now, you've come too far to give up. 457 00:15:57,388 --> 00:15:59,421 I'm not coming out. 458 00:15:59,423 --> 00:16:01,624 You listen to me. 459 00:16:01,626 --> 00:16:04,527 If you think those ladies out there are tough, 460 00:16:04,529 --> 00:16:06,662 what do you think your audition's gonna be like? 461 00:16:06,664 --> 00:16:09,999 Those club owners are jackals, okay? 462 00:16:10,001 --> 00:16:13,536 I need you to get over whatever's happening right here, 463 00:16:13,538 --> 00:16:16,171 get out there, and shake that ass. 464 00:16:16,173 --> 00:16:17,907 No! 465 00:16:17,909 --> 00:16:20,242 I'm scared. 466 00:16:20,244 --> 00:16:21,911 This one's from Anya. 467 00:16:23,214 --> 00:16:25,414 Can I have your attention, please? 468 00:16:25,416 --> 00:16:27,550 We are at a crossroads here. 469 00:16:27,552 --> 00:16:30,386 Are we the type of ladies that long for tiny foods 470 00:16:30,388 --> 00:16:32,321 and everything matching? 471 00:16:32,323 --> 00:16:36,258 Or are we young, horny, and ready to party? 472 00:16:36,260 --> 00:16:37,259 I'm horny. 473 00:16:37,261 --> 00:16:38,694 That's my girl. 474 00:16:38,696 --> 00:16:42,331 We have a scared male stripper in that bathroom. 475 00:16:42,333 --> 00:16:43,933 Think about it. 476 00:16:43,935 --> 00:16:45,935 We did that to him. 477 00:16:45,937 --> 00:16:49,138 We scared a stripper. 478 00:16:49,140 --> 00:16:50,539 That's not us. 479 00:16:50,541 --> 00:16:53,108 We're not stripper repellant. 480 00:16:53,110 --> 00:16:54,777 So let's make some noise 481 00:16:54,779 --> 00:16:57,313 and show 'em what kind of ladies we really are! 482 00:16:57,315 --> 00:16:58,747 Hell ya! 483 00:16:59,884 --> 00:17:05,154 Kyle! Kyle! Kyle! Kyle! Kyle! Kyle! 484 00:17:05,156 --> 00:17:08,223 Kyle! Kyle! Kyle! 485 00:17:17,001 --> 00:17:19,234 Yes! 486 00:17:19,236 --> 00:17:21,570 All right, cowboy, time to rope this filly. 487 00:17:21,572 --> 00:17:24,139 Fair warning, she's got some kick. 488 00:17:25,610 --> 00:17:27,343 This is not the party I wanted. 489 00:17:27,345 --> 00:17:28,911 He's ruining my shower. 490 00:17:28,913 --> 00:17:31,246 Man, [bleep], the shower. 491 00:17:31,248 --> 00:17:33,082 Ahhhhh! 492 00:17:35,987 --> 00:17:37,720 Well, if that's how you feel, you'll be spending 493 00:17:37,722 --> 00:17:39,922 the entire wedding at the kids' table. 494 00:17:49,400 --> 00:17:52,768 Go, go, go, go, go, go, go! 495 00:17:56,907 --> 00:17:57,906 Ah! 496 00:17:57,908 --> 00:17:59,308 Oh shit! 497 00:17:59,310 --> 00:18:00,576 Mm-hmm. 498 00:18:02,245 --> 00:18:03,811 This is a bad idea. 499 00:18:03,813 --> 00:18:05,813 Gemma texted me and said she wanted to see us. 500 00:18:05,815 --> 00:18:07,248 How long was she in the hospital? 501 00:18:07,250 --> 00:18:08,582 Three days. 502 00:18:08,584 --> 00:18:09,850 Do you think she's serving us with a lawsuit? 503 00:18:09,852 --> 00:18:13,787 Because if I see papers, I... am... running so fast. 504 00:18:13,789 --> 00:18:15,089 Ooh, here she comes. 505 00:18:15,091 --> 00:18:15,823 Is that her? 506 00:18:15,825 --> 00:18:16,957 My God, she looks good. 507 00:18:16,959 --> 00:18:17,892 Hi, guys! 508 00:18:17,894 --> 00:18:19,827 Hey, Gemma, you look... you look great. 509 00:18:19,829 --> 00:18:21,095 Yeah, how are you feeling? 510 00:18:21,097 --> 00:18:22,763 Fantastic. 511 00:18:22,765 --> 00:18:24,999 Really? You're not... you're not mad at us? 512 00:18:25,001 --> 00:18:26,133 Of course not. 513 00:18:26,135 --> 00:18:27,234 Breaking my jaw 514 00:18:27,236 --> 00:18:28,969 was the best thing that's ever happened to me. 515 00:18:28,971 --> 00:18:30,037 How? 516 00:18:30,039 --> 00:18:31,472 Well, I wanted to lose the last five pounds 517 00:18:31,474 --> 00:18:32,606 of my wedding weight. 518 00:18:32,608 --> 00:18:35,743 And thanks to you guys, I lost eight. 519 00:18:35,745 --> 00:18:37,211 Ha, can you believe it? 520 00:18:37,213 --> 00:18:39,346 I haven't weighed this much since I was 19. 521 00:18:39,348 --> 00:18:41,081 Oh well, you're welcome. 522 00:18:41,083 --> 00:18:42,349 I love you girls. 523 00:18:42,351 --> 00:18:43,450 All right, I'm gonna go get a juice, 524 00:18:43,452 --> 00:18:44,318 and I'll be right back. 525 00:18:44,320 --> 00:18:45,486 Okay. 526 00:18:45,488 --> 00:18:46,987 - Her face. - Oh my God. 527 00:18:46,989 --> 00:18:49,423 It looks like she ate a bunch of bees. 528 00:18:54,163 --> 00:18:56,430 Oooh, why aren't you at Men of Steel 529 00:18:56,432 --> 00:18:57,631 getting ready for your tryout? 530 00:18:57,633 --> 00:19:01,001 Doing like coke or pushups or whatever? 531 00:19:01,003 --> 00:19:02,203 Can I come in? 532 00:19:02,205 --> 00:19:03,137 Sure. 533 00:19:06,275 --> 00:19:07,341 Kyle, what's wrong? 534 00:19:10,379 --> 00:19:13,380 I really appreciate everything you've done for me. 535 00:19:13,382 --> 00:19:17,384 But... something changed in me after that bridal shower. 536 00:19:17,386 --> 00:19:18,452 Oh, don't worry. 537 00:19:18,454 --> 00:19:19,620 Gemma's happy. 538 00:19:19,622 --> 00:19:20,721 She said she lost eight pounds. 539 00:19:20,723 --> 00:19:21,722 But guess what? 540 00:19:21,724 --> 00:19:22,990 I don't believe it. 541 00:19:24,026 --> 00:19:25,526 No. 542 00:19:25,528 --> 00:19:27,194 I had an epiphany when I was riding with her 543 00:19:27,196 --> 00:19:28,195 in the ambulance. 544 00:19:28,197 --> 00:19:29,630 What does that mean? 545 00:19:29,632 --> 00:19:30,831 It's a moment of clarity, 546 00:19:30,833 --> 00:19:32,466 when you have a life-changing realization. 547 00:19:32,468 --> 00:19:33,734 Oooh, that's a good word. 548 00:19:33,736 --> 00:19:36,003 I'm gonna use that in a sentence later this week. 549 00:19:36,005 --> 00:19:38,138 I wanna go back to school and be an EMT. 550 00:19:38,140 --> 00:19:39,607 I wanna help people. 551 00:19:39,609 --> 00:19:41,075 So you're gonna move back to Omaha? 552 00:19:41,077 --> 00:19:42,643 Yeah. 553 00:19:42,645 --> 00:19:44,478 I miss being a ten. 554 00:19:44,480 --> 00:19:46,513 And... and I miss bread. 555 00:19:46,515 --> 00:19:48,315 Mm. I love bread. 556 00:19:49,752 --> 00:19:52,253 Are you done stripping? 557 00:19:52,255 --> 00:19:53,320 Yeah. 558 00:19:54,724 --> 00:19:55,699 Okay. 559 00:19:55,842 --> 00:19:58,109 Synced and corrected by MasterCookie - www.addic7ed.com - 560 00:19:58,127 --> 00:19:59,093 You okay? 561 00:19:59,095 --> 00:19:59,960 Mm-hmm, yeah. 562 00:19:59,962 --> 00:20:01,295 I'm just taking off my underwear.