1 00:00:01,617 --> 00:00:02,550 - Yes! - No! 2 00:00:02,565 --> 00:00:04,407 If we line up the voters this way, 3 00:00:04,408 --> 00:00:07,110 they'll be shuttled towards the impulse buys. 4 00:00:07,144 --> 00:00:09,279 There are going to be millions of new customers in here, 5 00:00:09,313 --> 00:00:10,947 and you're focused on the chewing gum? 6 00:00:10,981 --> 00:00:12,582 Why not funnel them towards, I don't know, 7 00:00:12,616 --> 00:00:13,583 the big-ticket stuff? 8 00:00:13,617 --> 00:00:14,651 Get your head in the game. 9 00:00:14,718 --> 00:00:15,952 Oh, my head is in the game. 10 00:00:15,986 --> 00:00:17,987 I've been here since 4:00 a.m. 11 00:00:18,055 --> 00:00:19,422 I've already had three meals. 12 00:00:19,456 --> 00:00:21,257 It's not even 7:00. That's too many meals. 13 00:00:21,292 --> 00:00:23,326 It's 7:00. We should open. 14 00:00:23,394 --> 00:00:24,661 Good idea. I'm on it. 15 00:00:24,728 --> 00:00:26,429 Let the democratic process begin. 16 00:00:26,463 --> 00:00:28,398 No, I'm in charge. 17 00:00:28,432 --> 00:00:31,401 I get to let the voters in. 18 00:00:31,427 --> 00:00:33,778 Let the democratic process begin. 19 00:00:33,779 --> 00:00:35,746 - No, you messed it up. - I know what the code is. 20 00:00:35,781 --> 00:00:37,148 Yeah, but I already put in the first three digits. 21 00:00:37,214 --> 00:00:38,414 Okay, so what's clear? 22 00:00:38,449 --> 00:00:39,449 That's enter. You got to go back. 23 00:00:39,483 --> 00:00:40,750 - No! - [Alarm Blaring] 24 00:00:40,785 --> 00:00:42,986 Great. Three wrong codes, so now we have to wait 25 00:00:43,053 --> 00:00:44,721 five minutes before we can try again. 26 00:00:44,755 --> 00:00:46,923 Yeah. Thanks, Dina. 27 00:00:46,957 --> 00:00:49,926 I'm sorry. It'll be a few minutes. 28 00:00:51,128 --> 00:00:52,854 [Upbeat Music] 29 00:00:52,855 --> 00:00:56,065 - Synced and corrected by hawken45 - - www.addic7ed.com - 30 00:00:56,066 --> 00:00:58,968 Attention Cloud 9 shoppers, Election Day is here, 31 00:00:59,003 --> 00:01:00,603 and we're offering up big discounts 32 00:01:00,638 --> 00:01:02,505 on all American-made products. 33 00:01:02,573 --> 00:01:04,607 So that's 40% off your generic medications, 34 00:01:04,642 --> 00:01:07,610 inferior electronics, and cheese curls. 35 00:01:07,645 --> 00:01:09,946 What is a comptroller? 36 00:01:09,980 --> 00:01:11,981 Something to do with computers, I think. 37 00:01:12,016 --> 00:01:15,534 Really? Or do those two words just sound the same? 38 00:01:15,535 --> 00:01:17,236 - They sound the same. - Yeah. 39 00:01:17,270 --> 00:01:19,605 Doesn't mean it's not true, though. 40 00:01:19,673 --> 00:01:21,707 What is this? 41 00:01:21,741 --> 00:01:25,363 "Official Cloud 9 Election Guide." 42 00:01:27,173 --> 00:01:29,007 They're trying to tell us who to vote for! 43 00:01:29,041 --> 00:01:30,375 I don't know what you're complaining about. 44 00:01:30,443 --> 00:01:31,643 I love getting mail. 45 00:01:31,677 --> 00:01:33,144 You don't think it's a little misleading? 46 00:01:33,179 --> 00:01:34,379 For State Senator: 47 00:01:34,447 --> 00:01:36,214 "Jack Peterson supports your right to work," 48 00:01:36,282 --> 00:01:38,717 which is basically just another way of saying "anti-union." 49 00:01:38,799 --> 00:01:41,138 Let's not use the U-word. 50 00:01:41,139 --> 00:01:43,107 - While Gary 'Slick' Langham"... - "Slick." 51 00:01:43,141 --> 00:01:46,644 They're actually using the nickname his opponent gave him. 52 00:01:46,687 --> 00:01:49,680 Langham "has never gone on record as being pro-America." 53 00:01:49,748 --> 00:01:51,148 What's his problem? 54 00:01:51,183 --> 00:01:53,571 Glenn, it just seems really shady. 55 00:01:53,607 --> 00:01:55,119 Are they even allowed to do this? 56 00:01:55,153 --> 00:01:55,698 Come on. 57 00:01:55,699 --> 00:01:59,064 It's not like anyone around here ever reads anything anyway. 58 00:01:59,065 --> 00:02:00,232 - Yeah, we do! - That's ridiculous. 59 00:02:00,267 --> 00:02:02,601 Oh? What was the emergency safety memo 60 00:02:02,669 --> 00:02:04,036 I sent out last week about? 61 00:02:04,070 --> 00:02:05,871 - Um... - The... 62 00:02:05,906 --> 00:02:07,606 See? Relax. 63 00:02:07,674 --> 00:02:08,917 It'll be fine. 64 00:02:08,918 --> 00:02:11,086 By the way, the answer was the building got an F 65 00:02:11,121 --> 00:02:13,021 in tornado preparedness. 66 00:02:13,056 --> 00:02:16,841 The inspector says this place is a house of cards. 67 00:02:16,842 --> 00:02:18,643 Hey. I'm just reminding everyone to vote. 68 00:02:18,676 --> 00:02:20,744 We want a 100% employee turnout. 69 00:02:20,811 --> 00:02:22,379 A lot of people died so you could vote. 70 00:02:22,413 --> 00:02:24,414 Also, a lot of horses died. 71 00:02:24,482 --> 00:02:25,899 We always forget about the horses. 72 00:02:25,900 --> 00:02:27,592 Oh, I'm not 18 yet. 73 00:02:27,745 --> 00:02:30,937 You know, it's funny. I can drink, but I can't vote. 74 00:02:30,972 --> 00:02:33,440 Well, I'll be definitely getting my vote on. 75 00:02:33,474 --> 00:02:34,975 Hey! 76 00:02:35,009 --> 00:02:35,976 Okay, good. 77 00:02:36,010 --> 00:02:38,278 Also, voting time is unpaid. 78 00:02:38,312 --> 00:02:40,147 Nobody paid those horses to die. 79 00:02:42,350 --> 00:02:44,084 Cheyenne, can you keep a secret? 80 00:02:44,118 --> 00:02:46,186 Oh, my God. Not really, but go. 81 00:02:46,254 --> 00:02:49,122 Okay. [Exhales] 82 00:02:49,157 --> 00:02:53,960 A few months ago, I found out that I'm actually undocumented. 83 00:02:53,995 --> 00:02:55,996 - Oh. - Yeah. 84 00:02:56,030 --> 00:02:56,999 Okay. 85 00:02:58,593 --> 00:03:00,427 I don't know what that means. 86 00:03:00,461 --> 00:03:03,730 It means that I'm an illegal alien. 87 00:03:05,505 --> 00:03:07,901 No, I'm... I'm human, 88 00:03:07,935 --> 00:03:10,737 who happens to live in the country illegally. 89 00:03:11,021 --> 00:03:13,455 Oh. That's your secret? 90 00:03:13,456 --> 00:03:15,742 I thought you were gonna tell me about how you're dating Jeff. 91 00:03:15,777 --> 00:03:18,302 Wait. You know about that? 92 00:03:18,303 --> 00:03:19,236 Yeah, but don't worry. 93 00:03:19,304 --> 00:03:20,337 I only told my baby, 94 00:03:20,372 --> 00:03:22,673 and she's not gonna tell anybody. 95 00:03:22,707 --> 00:03:24,178 She doesn't have any friends. 96 00:03:24,319 --> 00:03:26,420 Well, it doesn't matter anyway. 97 00:03:26,842 --> 00:03:28,242 When Dina finds out I can't vote, 98 00:03:28,243 --> 00:03:29,857 she'll figure out what's going on and fire me. 99 00:03:30,229 --> 00:03:33,331 Oh, you can't just get one of those "I voted" stickers 100 00:03:33,332 --> 00:03:34,962 and say that you voted? 101 00:03:34,997 --> 00:03:38,099 Oh. Yeah. Right. 102 00:03:38,133 --> 00:03:39,967 Chey! 103 00:03:40,002 --> 00:03:42,803 You are so much smarter than what I tell people. 104 00:03:42,838 --> 00:03:44,972 Aww, thank you. 105 00:03:45,007 --> 00:03:47,975 So, do you love Jeff? 106 00:03:48,010 --> 00:03:50,478 Shut up. I don't know. Maybe. 107 00:03:50,512 --> 00:03:52,346 ♪ Your mommy's all right ♪ 108 00:03:52,381 --> 00:03:54,015 ♪ Your daddy's all right ♪ 109 00:03:54,049 --> 00:03:57,318 ♪ They just seem a little weird ♪ 110 00:03:57,360 --> 00:04:00,199 ♪ Surrender, surrender ♪ 111 00:04:00,200 --> 00:04:02,534 Oh, gosh, Syd, I guess if I was pressed, 112 00:04:02,569 --> 00:04:03,869 I'd have to say 113 00:04:03,904 --> 00:04:06,605 Buzz Aldrin, Bruce Lee, or Murphy Brown. 114 00:04:06,673 --> 00:04:08,874 Beep. Beep. Java truck comin' through. 115 00:04:08,909 --> 00:04:09,826 What're you doing? 116 00:04:09,827 --> 00:04:13,229 American coffee for these American heroes. 117 00:04:13,264 --> 00:04:15,365 Actually, the beans are from Rwanda, 118 00:04:15,400 --> 00:04:18,702 but the water's from the good ol' faucet in the men's room. 119 00:04:18,736 --> 00:04:20,437 Well, as I'm sure Syd here will tell you, 120 00:04:20,505 --> 00:04:22,124 you can't give poll workers gifts. 121 00:04:22,152 --> 00:04:23,190 That's called bribery. 122 00:04:23,191 --> 00:04:24,908 Oh, that's okay. 123 00:04:24,943 --> 00:04:27,611 Actually, I usually have a Danish with my coffee. 124 00:04:27,679 --> 00:04:28,279 BOTH: Oh. 125 00:04:28,280 --> 00:04:30,813 - Yum. - So do I. Yeah. 126 00:04:30,848 --> 00:04:33,316 Fine, I guess I'll go buy myself a Danish. 127 00:04:33,740 --> 00:04:35,908 - Have a heavenly snack. - Enjoy it. 128 00:04:35,943 --> 00:04:36,909 Yeah. 129 00:04:36,944 --> 00:04:37,976 Could you move? 130 00:04:37,977 --> 00:04:39,701 [Imitating] Oh, hi, I'm Glenn. 131 00:04:39,745 --> 00:04:42,881 I really want these poll workers to love me. 132 00:04:42,949 --> 00:04:44,883 I'm not the one throwing myself at Syd 133 00:04:44,959 --> 00:04:46,493 like some kind of cigarette girl. 134 00:04:46,518 --> 00:04:48,216 - Oh, please. - Yeah, please... move! 135 00:04:48,217 --> 00:04:49,986 - No, I'm sitting here. - I'm putting this here. 136 00:04:49,987 --> 00:04:50,665 No, well, put it somewhere else! 137 00:04:50,666 --> 00:04:51,999 Find somewhere else for it go. No, I'm putting it there. 138 00:04:52,067 --> 00:04:53,300 Aah, it's hot! 139 00:04:53,335 --> 00:04:54,835 [Whispering] What did you do? 140 00:04:54,903 --> 00:04:57,638 I didn't do it! You did it with your tushy! 141 00:04:59,140 --> 00:05:00,774 [Both Gasp] 142 00:05:02,639 --> 00:05:03,605 Damn it. Distract them. 143 00:05:03,606 --> 00:05:04,572 What? 144 00:05:04,813 --> 00:05:06,747 ♪ 145 00:05:06,772 --> 00:05:08,340 It's totally slanted. 146 00:05:08,416 --> 00:05:09,868 They're just pushing the pro-business, 147 00:05:09,869 --> 00:05:11,102 anti-worker candidates. 148 00:05:11,169 --> 00:05:14,438 What? A corporation doing something unethical? 149 00:05:14,506 --> 00:05:15,873 To protect its interests? 150 00:05:15,907 --> 00:05:17,074 This is shocking! 151 00:05:17,109 --> 00:05:18,843 All right. Maybe Glenn's right. 152 00:05:18,877 --> 00:05:20,077 Maybe it doesn't matter. 153 00:05:20,112 --> 00:05:21,237 Hey, Marcus? 154 00:05:21,238 --> 00:05:23,085 Who did you vote for for state senate? 155 00:05:23,086 --> 00:05:24,009 Jack Peterson. 156 00:05:24,053 --> 00:05:25,742 He's pro-freedom and anti-bad guys, 157 00:05:25,809 --> 00:05:28,177 and those are two things I can get behind. 158 00:05:28,212 --> 00:05:30,346 Hey, are we still on for drinks tonight? 159 00:05:30,381 --> 00:05:31,514 - Please stop asking us. - No. 160 00:05:31,548 --> 00:05:32,515 - We never were. - Ah, cool. 161 00:05:32,549 --> 00:05:34,217 Well, we'll figure it out later. 162 00:05:35,552 --> 00:05:37,053 God, people will believe anything 163 00:05:37,087 --> 00:05:38,908 with the word "official" on it. 164 00:05:38,909 --> 00:05:39,909 [Gasps] 165 00:05:40,044 --> 00:05:42,345 Do you know what we should do? 166 00:05:42,489 --> 00:05:44,023 No, never mind. It's stupid. 167 00:05:44,024 --> 00:05:45,524 No, I'm gonna say it. 168 00:05:45,696 --> 00:05:48,934 We should make our own pamphlet with the truth. 169 00:05:48,935 --> 00:05:49,901 Ooh. 170 00:05:49,970 --> 00:05:52,404 A rogue pamphlet? 171 00:05:52,439 --> 00:05:53,839 You're crazy, lady. 172 00:05:53,907 --> 00:05:55,174 I think that's a great idea, 173 00:05:55,242 --> 00:05:56,976 and I have layout experience. 174 00:05:57,010 --> 00:05:58,944 - I was the editor... - Editor on your high school- 175 00:05:58,979 --> 00:06:00,097 I already told you that story. Forget it. 176 00:06:00,098 --> 00:06:02,032 - I am in. - Me too! 177 00:06:02,066 --> 00:06:03,874 Couldn't be less interested. 178 00:06:03,875 --> 00:06:06,282 Hey, should we invite Sandra to drinks tonight? 179 00:06:06,384 --> 00:06:07,843 Or is it just the core four? 180 00:06:09,212 --> 00:06:10,479 You guys are busy. 181 00:06:10,514 --> 00:06:12,348 Everyone's busy. 182 00:06:13,350 --> 00:06:14,483 [Clears Throat] 183 00:06:14,882 --> 00:06:16,155 Could I just snag one of these stickers? 184 00:06:16,156 --> 00:06:18,400 Oh, these are just for people who voted. 185 00:06:18,401 --> 00:06:19,235 Are you voting? 186 00:06:19,236 --> 00:06:21,737 I would, but I just don't like any of the candidates. 187 00:06:21,771 --> 00:06:23,405 Trump's all like... [Makes Fart Noise] 188 00:06:23,424 --> 00:06:25,905 And Hillary's all... [Makes A Different Fart Noise] 189 00:06:26,288 --> 00:06:28,222 Anyway, enough politics. I just need a sticker. 190 00:06:28,290 --> 00:06:32,159 Well, I'm sure the store sells stickers. 191 00:06:32,194 --> 00:06:33,894 I'm not just trying to collect stickers. 192 00:06:33,962 --> 00:06:35,462 I'm a grown man. 193 00:06:35,497 --> 00:06:37,965 Oh, my God... is that James Brolin? 194 00:06:37,999 --> 00:06:38,969 Who? 195 00:06:40,335 --> 00:06:42,369 Barbra Streisand's husband? 196 00:06:42,404 --> 00:06:44,171 Josh Brolin's dad? 197 00:06:44,691 --> 00:06:47,896 Diane Lane's ex-father-in-law? Am I crazy? 198 00:06:47,898 --> 00:06:49,732 Sir, you know who James Brolin is, right? 199 00:06:49,766 --> 00:06:51,033 What's he running for? 200 00:06:51,067 --> 00:06:52,868 Oh, my God. 201 00:06:54,237 --> 00:06:55,838 [Scoffs] 202 00:06:55,872 --> 00:06:58,741 [Hair Dryer Whooshing] 203 00:06:58,775 --> 00:07:01,043 Oh, yeah. That's drying up real nice. 204 00:07:01,077 --> 00:07:03,779 Did you write yourself in for attorney general? 205 00:07:04,448 --> 00:07:06,282 Could've been anyone. 206 00:07:06,349 --> 00:07:07,917 Come on. Hurry up. 207 00:07:07,951 --> 00:07:11,086 You know we got to get these back before anyone notices. 208 00:07:11,121 --> 00:07:12,588 You know what I just realized? 209 00:07:12,622 --> 00:07:14,522 There's, like, 50 ballots here. 210 00:07:14,523 --> 00:07:16,417 That could change the outcome of a close election, 211 00:07:16,417 --> 00:07:17,225 and Missouri's a swing state, 212 00:07:17,259 --> 00:07:19,594 so we could be changing the course of history. 213 00:07:19,662 --> 00:07:21,863 - You think so? - Sure. Think about it. 214 00:07:21,897 --> 00:07:24,866 Right now, you and I could be setting into effect 215 00:07:24,900 --> 00:07:26,101 a chain of events that could cause 216 00:07:26,168 --> 00:07:28,870 the colonization of Mars or World War III 217 00:07:28,904 --> 00:07:30,930 and billions of innocent deaths. 218 00:07:31,384 --> 00:07:32,585 [Chuckles] 219 00:07:32,696 --> 00:07:34,342 You know, it's funny, I try so hard to keep 220 00:07:34,343 --> 00:07:37,778 God out of the workplace, and yet, here I am, 221 00:07:37,813 --> 00:07:40,448 in the workplace, 222 00:07:40,482 --> 00:07:41,949 and I am God. 223 00:07:41,984 --> 00:07:43,351 [Crashing] 224 00:07:43,385 --> 00:07:44,485 What are you doing? 225 00:07:44,520 --> 00:07:46,192 We need to speed this up. 226 00:07:48,189 --> 00:07:50,090 - No, turn it off! - I'm trying! 227 00:07:50,158 --> 00:07:51,525 Oh! Oh! 228 00:07:51,559 --> 00:07:52,659 Come back! 229 00:07:53,492 --> 00:07:55,560 ♪ 230 00:07:58,351 --> 00:07:59,852 Well, the ballots are clearly gone. 231 00:07:59,853 --> 00:08:03,275 Okay. We're just gonna have to face the music and tell Syd. 232 00:08:03,275 --> 00:08:05,828 We tampered with an election. Do you know how serious that is? 233 00:08:05,829 --> 00:08:06,962 It was a goof-up! 234 00:08:06,963 --> 00:08:07,996 We have to cover our tracks. 235 00:08:08,064 --> 00:08:08,997 We've got to come up with an alibi 236 00:08:09,065 --> 00:08:10,132 for what we've been doing all day. 237 00:08:10,166 --> 00:08:11,600 Okay, uh... 238 00:08:12,335 --> 00:08:13,802 We were in my office. 239 00:08:13,836 --> 00:08:16,004 - And we were working. - Too vague. 240 00:08:16,072 --> 00:08:18,106 The more specific the lie, the more believable it is. 241 00:08:18,141 --> 00:08:21,243 Okay, we were in your office because you were telling me 242 00:08:21,277 --> 00:08:22,624 about the affair you've been having 243 00:08:22,625 --> 00:08:23,720 with your dental hygienist. 244 00:08:23,732 --> 00:08:24,780 She likes when you dance for her. 245 00:08:24,814 --> 00:08:26,748 I do not want to be having an affair! 246 00:08:26,782 --> 00:08:28,156 - Do you want to go to jail? - No! 247 00:08:28,158 --> 00:08:29,150 Then you've been dancing for Shelley! 248 00:08:29,151 --> 00:08:30,732 - All right, fine! - Okay. 249 00:08:30,733 --> 00:08:32,153 I'll erase the security cam footage. 250 00:08:32,154 --> 00:08:34,200 You need to find a field at least an hour's drive from here 251 00:08:34,243 --> 00:08:36,198 and bury that ballot box, and I mean bury it deep. 252 00:08:36,694 --> 00:08:39,129 Then we can never, ever, ever tell anyone... 253 00:08:42,133 --> 00:08:42,966 Hey! 254 00:08:46,304 --> 00:08:48,505 Not to put my head in the lion's mouth, 255 00:08:48,539 --> 00:08:52,075 but now I'm thinking Times New Roman. 256 00:08:52,143 --> 00:08:54,756 Times New Roman would be a fine font, Jonah, 257 00:08:54,757 --> 00:08:57,826 and so would Helvetica and Garamond, 258 00:08:57,860 --> 00:09:00,799 and really any font would be just fine. 259 00:09:02,098 --> 00:09:03,141 Not Wingdings. 260 00:09:03,142 --> 00:09:05,343 No one was suggesting Wingdings. 261 00:09:05,410 --> 00:09:07,177 Oh, you guys looking at porn? 262 00:09:07,245 --> 00:09:09,613 What? No. We're making the pamphlet. 263 00:09:09,648 --> 00:09:12,750 Wow! And they said it couldn't be done. 264 00:09:12,784 --> 00:09:15,753 But lo and behold, here you are doing it, 265 00:09:15,787 --> 00:09:17,588 making a pamphlet! 266 00:09:17,622 --> 00:09:19,623 I feel like he's mocking us. 267 00:09:19,658 --> 00:09:22,092 Ooh, what about Palatino? 268 00:09:22,127 --> 00:09:24,328 Oh, Palatino's nice, actually. 269 00:09:24,362 --> 00:09:25,529 You watching porn? 270 00:09:25,597 --> 00:09:27,298 - Yup. - Mm. 271 00:09:27,332 --> 00:09:29,800 Oh, I know that girl. 272 00:09:31,303 --> 00:09:33,203 Guess who got a sticker. 273 00:09:33,271 --> 00:09:34,772 Oh, my God, really? 274 00:09:34,806 --> 00:09:35,806 [Exclaims] 275 00:09:38,841 --> 00:09:40,442 I made it myself. 276 00:09:40,476 --> 00:09:42,077 [Chuckles] 277 00:09:43,279 --> 00:09:45,080 Yeah. 278 00:09:45,114 --> 00:09:47,349 I appreciate it. 279 00:09:47,417 --> 00:09:49,918 The thought, not the sticker, 280 00:09:49,953 --> 00:09:51,920 because it's useless. 281 00:09:51,955 --> 00:09:54,423 It's garbage. 'Kay? 282 00:09:56,326 --> 00:10:00,095 ♪ 'Cause we are living in a material world ♪ 283 00:10:00,129 --> 00:10:02,531 ♪ And I am a material girl ♪ 284 00:10:02,599 --> 00:10:04,499 ♪ You know that we are living ♪ 285 00:10:06,269 --> 00:10:08,361 - Hey, girl. - Hey. 286 00:10:08,362 --> 00:10:11,130 - Bitching color, boo. - I know, right? 287 00:10:11,165 --> 00:10:13,614 Yeah, really brings out the blueness of her veins. 288 00:10:13,615 --> 00:10:15,749 Listen, I've been thinking about it a lot lately, 289 00:10:15,783 --> 00:10:19,686 and I have decided that you are my best friend in the store. 290 00:10:19,754 --> 00:10:22,623 - Me? Really? - Yeah. 291 00:10:22,657 --> 00:10:26,377 Okay, well, you're nice too. 292 00:10:26,378 --> 00:10:27,845 Yeah, I am nice. 293 00:10:27,879 --> 00:10:29,246 Anyway, I've been thinking about it, 294 00:10:29,280 --> 00:10:30,714 and I feel like we should just have 295 00:10:30,749 --> 00:10:33,052 a good old-fashioned girlfriend gabfest. 296 00:10:33,072 --> 00:10:33,884 [Laughs] 297 00:10:33,918 --> 00:10:35,185 Maybe you could tell me if you've seen or heard 298 00:10:35,220 --> 00:10:37,388 anything suspicious recently. 299 00:10:37,422 --> 00:10:38,756 Mm. Suspicious? 300 00:10:38,790 --> 00:10:41,358 Yeah, you know, like... I don't know... 301 00:10:41,393 --> 00:10:44,049 if you know of anybody doing anything illegal. 302 00:10:44,050 --> 00:10:45,017 Dish, girlfriend! 303 00:10:45,051 --> 00:10:48,354 [Both Chuckle] 304 00:10:48,388 --> 00:10:52,291 Mm. Um, no. 305 00:10:52,325 --> 00:10:53,726 Really? 306 00:10:53,794 --> 00:10:55,194 'Cause, you know, there's nothing I hate more 307 00:10:55,228 --> 00:10:56,996 than when my best friends lie to me. 308 00:10:57,731 --> 00:11:01,133 Okay, I have to go. 309 00:11:01,168 --> 00:11:02,134 I have to pee really bad. 310 00:11:02,169 --> 00:11:03,536 Excuse me. 311 00:11:03,570 --> 00:11:04,970 You want me to come with? 312 00:11:05,005 --> 00:11:07,339 That's what best girlfriends do, right? 313 00:11:09,509 --> 00:11:11,129 - Do you think she knows? - It's hard to say. 314 00:11:11,130 --> 00:11:14,932 She's either playing dumb or just is. 315 00:11:14,966 --> 00:11:17,904 Jack Peterson is anti-union, anti-worker, 316 00:11:17,905 --> 00:11:20,373 but Gary Langham wants to raise minimum wage... 317 00:11:20,407 --> 00:11:23,209 - And expand sick days. - Paid sick days. 318 00:11:23,244 --> 00:11:24,544 [Hip-Hop Music] 319 00:11:24,578 --> 00:11:25,912 ♪ This is how you start a party ♪ 320 00:11:25,946 --> 00:11:27,847 ♪ Start a party - ♪ Hey, hey 321 00:11:27,882 --> 00:11:29,349 ♪ This is how you start a party ♪ 322 00:11:29,383 --> 00:11:31,184 ♪ Start a party - ♪ Ow! 323 00:11:31,218 --> 00:11:33,019 ♪ This is how you start a party ♪ 324 00:11:33,053 --> 00:11:34,954 ♪ Start a party, yeah - ♪ Hey, hey 325 00:11:35,022 --> 00:11:36,222 I don't know about youse guys, 326 00:11:36,257 --> 00:11:38,904 but I'm fed up with these corporate fat cats. 327 00:11:38,905 --> 00:11:41,840 Not all warehouse workers are from 1950s Brooklyn. 328 00:11:41,875 --> 00:11:44,177 You know what, I'm fed up with these corporate fat cats too. 329 00:11:44,211 --> 00:11:46,012 - I'll take one of those. - Hey! 330 00:11:46,046 --> 00:11:47,580 ♪ Beaucoup bottles on the counter ♪ 331 00:11:47,614 --> 00:11:49,215 ♪ On the counter, yo - ♪ Hey 332 00:11:49,249 --> 00:11:51,851 ♪ This is how you start a party ♪ 333 00:11:51,885 --> 00:11:54,053 - She's a good broad, huh? - And you're a good guy, Jonah. 334 00:11:54,088 --> 00:11:56,689 Thank you very much. I appreciate it. 335 00:11:56,724 --> 00:11:58,191 ♪ We about to start the party ♪ 336 00:11:58,225 --> 00:11:59,759 ♪ Start the party ♪ 337 00:11:59,793 --> 00:12:00,760 ♪ Hey ♪ 338 00:12:00,794 --> 00:12:02,128 You really think Dina knows? 339 00:12:02,196 --> 00:12:05,041 Maybe. She asked me a lot of weird questions. 340 00:12:06,200 --> 00:12:08,301 The stupid poll worker lady is guarding those stickers 341 00:12:08,369 --> 00:12:10,393 like it's her last tub of Activia. 342 00:12:10,394 --> 00:12:12,561 Oh, hey. Mateo, did you vote? 343 00:12:12,594 --> 00:12:16,236 Oh, my God. Why is everyone obsessed with voting today? 344 00:12:16,237 --> 00:12:17,203 Oh. 345 00:12:17,239 --> 00:12:18,272 [Sighs] 346 00:12:22,797 --> 00:12:25,220 So then, I took the S train 347 00:12:25,232 --> 00:12:28,651 from the docks to my mother's house in Flatbush. 348 00:12:28,804 --> 00:12:30,389 [In Brooklyn Accent] Hey, youse a good kid, 349 00:12:30,393 --> 00:12:31,805 respecting your mother like that. 350 00:12:31,841 --> 00:12:33,241 Yeah, but sometimes, you got to say, 351 00:12:33,309 --> 00:12:35,594 "Hey, Ma, I'm going out with the fellas." 352 00:12:35,595 --> 00:12:37,269 - Yeah. - "I'll see you at church." 353 00:12:37,302 --> 00:12:39,137 Oh, your guy's religious. 354 00:12:39,303 --> 00:12:40,403 No, he goes to church 355 00:12:40,437 --> 00:12:42,444 to respect his mother's old-world values. 356 00:12:42,445 --> 00:12:43,873 - Sure. - Obviously. 357 00:12:43,908 --> 00:12:45,680 - [Laughs] - That's the story. 358 00:12:45,681 --> 00:12:47,673 You know, don't take this the wrong way, 359 00:12:47,674 --> 00:12:51,575 but I feel like you've become a lot more fun since I've known you. 360 00:12:51,643 --> 00:12:52,728 Thanks. 361 00:12:52,729 --> 00:12:54,249 And if I may return the compliment, 362 00:12:54,250 --> 00:12:56,932 I think you've become marginally less annoying. 363 00:12:56,967 --> 00:12:58,234 [In Brooklyn Accent] Hey, hey, hey. 364 00:12:58,268 --> 00:13:00,002 Don't make me blush in front of the fellas, huh? 365 00:13:00,070 --> 00:13:01,637 [Laughs] 366 00:13:04,841 --> 00:13:06,108 Hey, Syd. Everything all right? 367 00:13:06,143 --> 00:13:07,276 You were in there a while. 368 00:13:07,310 --> 00:13:08,582 Yeah, it's okay. 369 00:13:08,741 --> 00:13:09,841 We just wanted to make sure 370 00:13:09,876 --> 00:13:11,510 there were enough poll workers out there, 371 00:13:11,544 --> 00:13:14,680 'cause, you know, we wouldn't want any voter fraud to happen. 372 00:13:14,714 --> 00:13:16,181 Even though, as I keep telling him, 373 00:13:16,215 --> 00:13:18,016 there's almost no voter fraud in this country. 374 00:13:18,051 --> 00:13:21,219 I mean, it's not worth the penalty of, um... 375 00:13:21,254 --> 00:13:23,722 $10,000 and five years in prison. 376 00:13:25,558 --> 00:13:27,592 Did you say "prison"? 377 00:13:27,660 --> 00:13:29,695 - Or "prism"? - Why would he say "prism"? 378 00:13:29,729 --> 00:13:31,096 What's five years in prism? 379 00:13:31,164 --> 00:13:32,998 Let him answer. 380 00:13:33,032 --> 00:13:34,232 Prison. 381 00:13:35,234 --> 00:13:38,737 - With an N or an M? - Oh, my God. 382 00:13:38,771 --> 00:13:41,748 - So then I rip up my note cards. - No. 383 00:13:41,749 --> 00:13:46,327 And say, "Fellow students, forget these note cards." 384 00:13:46,328 --> 00:13:47,142 Going rogue. 385 00:13:47,143 --> 00:13:49,944 "I'm going to speak from my heart." 386 00:13:50,333 --> 00:13:50,974 Okay. 387 00:13:50,975 --> 00:13:54,187 And then, from the back of the auditorium, Renee yells... 388 00:13:54,188 --> 00:13:55,288 No. Mm-mm. 389 00:13:55,357 --> 00:13:56,757 "Those cards are blank!" 390 00:13:56,792 --> 00:13:59,093 Oh! Renee is the worst. 391 00:13:59,127 --> 00:14:00,561 I haven't even told you about the Winter Ball story... 392 00:14:00,596 --> 00:14:02,096 Surprise! 393 00:14:02,130 --> 00:14:04,465 Oh, hey. Hi. 394 00:14:04,661 --> 00:14:05,928 What are you... what are you doing here? 395 00:14:05,996 --> 00:14:08,864 You said you'd help me pick out some towels. 396 00:14:08,898 --> 00:14:10,599 Oh, hi. I'm Naomi. 397 00:14:10,667 --> 00:14:13,333 Oh, Naomi, this is Amy. She's my boss. 398 00:14:13,334 --> 00:14:15,702 Amy, this is Naomi. She... we're... 399 00:14:15,770 --> 00:14:18,538 Oh, it's okay. We don't have to label it yet. 400 00:14:18,606 --> 00:14:19,539 It's nice to meet you. 401 00:14:19,607 --> 00:14:22,342 You too. As well. 402 00:14:23,444 --> 00:14:24,286 Yeah. 403 00:14:24,287 --> 00:14:26,254 Naomi works the cheese booth 404 00:14:26,288 --> 00:14:28,789 at the farmers market by my house. 405 00:14:28,857 --> 00:14:30,892 Yes, the cheese booth, not the soap booth. 406 00:14:30,926 --> 00:14:31,893 [Laughs] 407 00:14:31,927 --> 00:14:33,394 I forgot about that guy! 408 00:14:33,428 --> 00:14:34,795 "Where's the soap booth?" 409 00:14:34,863 --> 00:14:36,097 [Laughing] Yeah. 410 00:14:36,131 --> 00:14:38,132 This guy sounds crazy. 411 00:14:40,264 --> 00:14:42,000 So do you have time now? 412 00:14:42,383 --> 00:14:45,596 Yeah, well... Amy, is it cool if I help Naomi 413 00:14:45,597 --> 00:14:47,062 pick out some stuff for her apartment, 414 00:14:47,063 --> 00:14:49,201 and then we'll do the pamphlet stuff after? 415 00:14:49,244 --> 00:14:50,734 Yeah. Of course that's cool. 416 00:14:50,769 --> 00:14:53,771 Wow, a new apartment. A new man. 417 00:14:53,805 --> 00:14:55,873 It's a good time to be Naomi, hey? 418 00:14:55,907 --> 00:14:58,442 [Laughs] Yeah. Thanks. 419 00:15:00,111 --> 00:15:01,979 Okay. All right. 420 00:15:07,953 --> 00:15:08,986 Oh, my God. 421 00:15:15,459 --> 00:15:16,492 [Groaning] 422 00:15:20,265 --> 00:15:23,500 Rats gave birth in the nacho cheese. 423 00:15:23,501 --> 00:15:24,668 Cooked themselves to death. 424 00:15:30,928 --> 00:15:32,595 Thank you. 425 00:15:34,268 --> 00:15:37,904 [Gagging] 426 00:15:38,650 --> 00:15:41,518 ♪ Downtown the young ones are growing ♪ 427 00:15:41,586 --> 00:15:43,654 ♪ We're the kids in America ♪ 428 00:15:43,688 --> 00:15:45,155 Hey, Marcus! 429 00:15:45,991 --> 00:15:49,802 Hey... you've been to prison, right? 430 00:15:49,803 --> 00:15:52,105 Yeah. I mean, like, barely. 431 00:15:52,138 --> 00:15:54,139 Long enough to form lifelong friendships. 432 00:15:54,173 --> 00:15:57,046 How do you think a guy like me would do in there? 433 00:15:58,244 --> 00:16:00,846 Baby face. Kind eyes. 434 00:16:00,914 --> 00:16:03,348 Soft skin. Cute tummy. 435 00:16:03,416 --> 00:16:04,816 You'd be very popular. 436 00:16:04,851 --> 00:16:06,921 Oh. Well, that's good. 437 00:16:06,922 --> 00:16:07,855 No, that's bad. 438 00:16:07,923 --> 00:16:08,957 That's very bad. 439 00:16:08,998 --> 00:16:10,198 Oh. 440 00:16:10,259 --> 00:16:11,492 Let's say, hypothetically, 441 00:16:11,527 --> 00:16:14,429 that two people accidentally committed a crime. 442 00:16:14,463 --> 00:16:16,162 There may have been a witness. 443 00:16:16,163 --> 00:16:17,460 Okay, well, if it were me, 444 00:16:17,461 --> 00:16:20,003 Ah... I guess I'd get my partner to confess on tape. 445 00:16:20,034 --> 00:16:21,335 That way, if it went south, 446 00:16:21,369 --> 00:16:23,303 you could trade that in for a reduced sentence. 447 00:16:23,338 --> 00:16:24,972 That's what my mom did to me. 448 00:16:25,006 --> 00:16:25,547 Huh. 449 00:16:27,308 --> 00:16:28,022 Okay. 450 00:16:28,023 --> 00:16:29,256 Thanks. 451 00:16:33,027 --> 00:16:35,162 Hey, Marcus. You've been to prison, right? 452 00:16:35,196 --> 00:16:37,912 Oh-ho-ho. Look who's in demand today. 453 00:16:39,100 --> 00:16:40,461 It screams you, actually. 454 00:16:40,462 --> 00:16:42,830 Yeah, that's a very "you" towel. Okay, you can have that one. 455 00:16:42,865 --> 00:16:43,831 No? All right. 456 00:16:43,866 --> 00:16:45,209 Did you guys meet Naomi? 457 00:16:45,210 --> 00:16:46,210 She's super cute. 458 00:16:46,429 --> 00:16:48,503 Yeah, she's really cute for Jonah. 459 00:16:48,537 --> 00:16:49,903 Do you think they're serious? 460 00:16:49,904 --> 00:16:52,131 Oh, yeah. They've had sex, like, 11 times. 461 00:16:52,397 --> 00:16:53,635 - Really? - I don't know. 462 00:16:53,636 --> 00:16:54,735 Why would I know that? 463 00:16:54,768 --> 00:16:57,604 You okay, sweetie? You seem stressed. 464 00:16:57,638 --> 00:16:59,839 Oh. Oh. 465 00:16:59,907 --> 00:17:02,075 My shoulders are so tight. 466 00:17:04,912 --> 00:17:06,813 What are you doing? 467 00:17:09,283 --> 00:17:11,818 I was trying to feel your breasts. 468 00:17:15,656 --> 00:17:17,023 Maybe he's drunk. 469 00:17:17,091 --> 00:17:18,968 There's a lot of drunk people here. 470 00:17:22,582 --> 00:17:24,082 Attention, my fellow Americans. 471 00:17:24,117 --> 00:17:26,351 I just noticed something on the ballot about a "Supertrain." 472 00:17:26,384 --> 00:17:27,685 I'm not sure what it is, 473 00:17:27,719 --> 00:17:30,087 but it sounds more powerful than a normal train. 474 00:17:30,122 --> 00:17:31,422 Let's make this happen, people. 475 00:17:31,456 --> 00:17:32,890 Vote Supertrain. 476 00:17:32,924 --> 00:17:34,592 Testing. 477 00:17:34,626 --> 00:17:36,627 Hey, you wanted to see me? 478 00:17:38,396 --> 00:17:40,764 Yeah. Come on in. 479 00:17:40,799 --> 00:17:42,433 I thought we should talk about 480 00:17:42,467 --> 00:17:44,435 all the stuff that went on today. 481 00:17:44,469 --> 00:17:46,604 Yeah. Actually, I was thinking the same thing. 482 00:17:46,638 --> 00:17:48,572 It would be great to just get on the same page. 483 00:17:48,607 --> 00:17:51,242 So, Dina Fox. 484 00:17:51,741 --> 00:17:52,708 What time is it? 485 00:17:52,742 --> 00:17:56,627 4:17 on November 8th, 2016, right? 486 00:17:56,628 --> 00:17:58,180 Yeah. Crazy day, especially given 487 00:17:58,181 --> 00:18:00,149 all the things you did, Glenn Sturgis, 488 00:18:00,183 --> 00:18:02,718 son of Arthur and Marian Sturgis. 489 00:18:04,692 --> 00:18:05,410 Hey. 490 00:18:05,411 --> 00:18:09,080 I'm sorry. I didn't know Naomi was coming in today. 491 00:18:09,852 --> 00:18:11,253 No, it's... I mean, it's totally fine. 492 00:18:11,287 --> 00:18:12,299 I was just surprised. 493 00:18:12,300 --> 00:18:13,634 I didn't even know you were dating anyone. 494 00:18:13,702 --> 00:18:15,269 Oh. 495 00:18:15,318 --> 00:18:19,211 Is that something that I'm supposed to inform you about or? 496 00:18:19,274 --> 00:18:21,093 No! No, I don't care. 497 00:18:21,094 --> 00:18:22,665 I was just making conversation. 498 00:18:24,355 --> 00:18:25,955 Ah, so the new shift starts soon. 499 00:18:25,982 --> 00:18:27,983 Do you want me to just hand these out as people clock in... 500 00:18:28,018 --> 00:18:28,943 Oh, do you know what? 501 00:18:28,944 --> 00:18:30,143 Actually, I got someone else to help. 502 00:18:30,671 --> 00:18:32,411 Hey, you're gonna vote how I tell you to vote, 503 00:18:32,446 --> 00:18:33,513 or I swear to God, 504 00:18:33,581 --> 00:18:34,915 I'm gonna put a cricket in your house, 505 00:18:34,949 --> 00:18:36,349 and you'll never know where it is, 506 00:18:36,417 --> 00:18:37,817 and it'll drive you crazy. 507 00:18:37,852 --> 00:18:39,019 Marcus? 508 00:18:39,086 --> 00:18:41,588 Yeah. Well, you were busy, and, you know, 509 00:18:41,622 --> 00:18:43,690 I figured your shift is over, so... 510 00:18:43,758 --> 00:18:46,927 Yeah. Yeah, no. Cool. Um... 511 00:18:46,961 --> 00:18:49,629 Okay, then, I'm gonna clock out. 512 00:18:49,664 --> 00:18:52,432 - Yeah. See you tomorrow. - Okay. 513 00:18:53,701 --> 00:18:59,206 - We're gonna vote right now. - Put me down! My bones! 514 00:18:59,273 --> 00:19:01,208 Put me down! 515 00:19:01,275 --> 00:19:02,842 He's such an idiot. 516 00:19:04,545 --> 00:19:06,279 Okay. Don't ask me any questions, 517 00:19:06,314 --> 00:19:08,348 but I want to buy your sticker. 518 00:19:08,382 --> 00:19:09,516 I can't tell you why. 519 00:19:11,686 --> 00:19:12,953 Okay. 520 00:19:12,987 --> 00:19:15,355 It's just, you know, it's kind of a secret. 521 00:19:15,389 --> 00:19:18,325 I absolutely do not care. 522 00:19:18,359 --> 00:19:19,893 Excuse me. 523 00:19:21,295 --> 00:19:23,363 - It's kind of a long story. - Do not care. 524 00:19:23,397 --> 00:19:24,731 Okay. 525 00:19:24,799 --> 00:19:26,199 [Both Laughing] 526 00:19:26,234 --> 00:19:27,867 You know, that's funny, because I distinctly remembered 527 00:19:27,902 --> 00:19:30,203 you destroying the ballots, Glenn Sturgis. 528 00:19:30,238 --> 00:19:32,472 Well, that's really funny, because how could I have? 529 00:19:32,506 --> 00:19:35,642 I was in my office all day long... 530 00:19:35,676 --> 00:19:38,378 having an affair with my dental hygienist, Shelley. 531 00:19:38,412 --> 00:19:40,013 Excuse me. 532 00:19:40,668 --> 00:19:41,944 Just wanted to let you know I voted. 533 00:19:41,945 --> 00:19:43,946 We're having a casual conversation! 534 00:19:44,014 --> 00:19:46,849 - Get out! - Okay. 535 00:19:46,883 --> 00:19:49,585 [Upbeat Music] 536 00:19:49,619 --> 00:19:51,620 District 35, where we are projecting 537 00:19:51,688 --> 00:19:53,956 pro-labor candidate Gary Langham will prevail. 538 00:19:54,024 --> 00:19:56,382 Yes! Yes! 539 00:19:57,461 --> 00:20:00,176 We did it! We got Langham elected! 540 00:20:04,267 --> 00:20:05,734 Ames! Did you see? 541 00:20:05,769 --> 00:20:06,735 - Yes! - We did it! 542 00:20:06,770 --> 00:20:08,938 I know! It's amazing! 543 00:20:08,972 --> 00:20:10,606 Oh, it's such a rush. Thank you for involving me. 544 00:20:10,640 --> 00:20:12,708 No, thank you! We made a good team. 545 00:20:12,742 --> 00:20:15,711 - We did, didn't we? - Yeah, we did. 546 00:20:16,713 --> 00:20:18,147 Ew, no. Marcus, what the hell? 547 00:20:18,215 --> 00:20:19,615 What? I thought this was, like, 548 00:20:19,649 --> 00:20:20,783 a flirty thing we were doing. 549 00:20:20,817 --> 00:20:23,118 - No. - I'm so sorry. Wow. 550 00:20:23,153 --> 00:20:27,056 I totally misread that. Ugh. 551 00:20:27,928 --> 00:20:31,126 I mean, it's okay. I just... I was just startled. 552 00:20:31,161 --> 00:20:32,495 I was just a little... Marcus! 553 00:20:32,562 --> 00:20:34,630 You just said it's okay. 554 00:20:38,668 --> 00:20:40,769 - Hey, Dorothy. - Uh-huh? 555 00:20:40,804 --> 00:20:43,138 We're missing 53 ballots. 556 00:20:43,173 --> 00:20:44,740 Really? 557 00:20:46,009 --> 00:20:47,977 Jeez, that's way down from last time. 558 00:20:48,011 --> 00:20:49,645 [Laughs] 559 00:20:49,679 --> 00:20:53,838 - Just tell me what you did. - No, you tell me what you did! 560 00:20:53,987 --> 00:20:54,483 Fine. 561 00:20:54,729 --> 00:20:56,863 I, Glenn Sturgis, deliberately destroyed... 562 00:20:56,897 --> 00:20:58,331 No, I'm Glenn! 563 00:20:58,365 --> 00:20:59,999 - 50 United States ballots. - Stop making me say that! 564 00:21:00,034 --> 00:21:03,036 And then I covered it up, which is dumb, because I'm dumb. 565 00:21:03,070 --> 00:21:04,404 I'm Dina Fox! Dina Fox! 566 00:21:04,472 --> 00:21:06,005 Also, I have a tiny penis, and my wife hates my guts! 567 00:21:06,040 --> 00:21:08,174 And I destroyed the ballots 'cause I'm a big, stupid meanie!