1
00:00:04,320 --> 00:00:05,953
Out here in the middle,
2
00:00:05,955 --> 00:00:07,621
nothing gets us more excited
3
00:00:07,623 --> 00:00:10,158
than the grand opening of a new store.
4
00:00:10,160 --> 00:00:11,993
Well, they did it.
5
00:00:11,995 --> 00:00:14,829
They outcheaped the Frugal Hoosier.
6
00:00:14,831 --> 00:00:16,831
Yesterday's Bounty?
7
00:00:16,833 --> 00:00:18,566
I'm telling you, Mike.
This is our new place.
8
00:00:18,568 --> 00:00:19,833
They've got everything...
9
00:00:19,835 --> 00:00:23,168
backed-over bread, preopened pasta.
10
00:00:23,170 --> 00:00:25,005
- Hmm.
- Generic Chinese cereal.
11
00:00:25,007 --> 00:00:28,309
Ooh! Look at this.
I got all this for 3 bucks.
12
00:00:30,779 --> 00:00:32,034
It's misshapen fruit.
13
00:00:32,059 --> 00:00:33,592
Looks like a tumor, but it's fruit.
14
00:00:33,746 --> 00:00:35,012
Their word, not mine.
15
00:00:35,014 --> 00:00:37,648
♪ You're gonna love our pizza ♪
16
00:00:38,535 --> 00:00:39,984
I'm surprised to see you
in such a good mood.
17
00:00:40,719 --> 00:00:42,953
What, 'cause of Axl
not coming to Thanksgiving?
18
00:00:42,955 --> 00:00:45,489
Yeah, well, that
and the not talking to us
19
00:00:45,491 --> 00:00:46,824
or answering our calls for days.
20
00:00:46,826 --> 00:00:47,992
Yeah, I guess that.
21
00:00:47,994 --> 00:00:49,627
Look, it sucks. It definitely sucks.
22
00:00:49,629 --> 00:00:51,995
But I've just decided
I am gonna stay positive.
23
00:00:51,997 --> 00:00:53,930
I mean, he can't ignore us forever.
24
00:00:53,932 --> 00:00:56,433
Eventually, he's gonna need food
and clean underwear.
25
00:00:56,435 --> 00:00:59,373
He'll come home. We'll make up.
Everything will be fine.
26
00:00:59,375 --> 00:01:02,105
So, in the meantime,
I say we just stay calm
27
00:01:02,107 --> 00:01:04,374
and enjoy a bowl of Tiananmen Squares.
28
00:01:05,477 --> 00:01:09,211
Oh! It's dishwashing detergent.
29
00:01:09,213 --> 00:01:10,813
No. Cereal.
30
00:01:12,717 --> 00:01:14,617
So, where are you going
for Christmas break?
31
00:01:14,619 --> 00:01:15,618
You tell me first.
32
00:01:15,620 --> 00:01:16,519
Okay, we'll tell together.
33
00:01:16,521 --> 00:01:18,287
Ready? 1, 2, 3.
34
00:01:18,289 --> 00:01:19,622
- Paris.
- Nowhere.
35
00:01:19,624 --> 00:01:20,690
Oh!
36
00:01:20,692 --> 00:01:22,625
Give me your purse 'cause it's fabulous!
37
00:01:22,627 --> 00:01:24,026
Hey! No!
38
00:01:25,063 --> 00:01:26,429
We don't know him!
39
00:01:26,431 --> 00:01:27,796
We don't know him!
40
00:01:27,798 --> 00:01:28,964
Yes, we do! Yes, we do!
41
00:01:28,966 --> 00:01:30,666
Lexie, stop! This is my friend, Brad.
42
00:01:30,668 --> 00:01:31,600
This is Brad!
43
00:01:31,602 --> 00:01:33,536
Oh, Brad, Lexie. Lexie, Brad.
44
00:01:33,538 --> 00:01:34,570
How's it going?
45
00:01:34,572 --> 00:01:36,172
Oh, my God. I'm so sorry!
46
00:01:36,174 --> 00:01:37,940
I've heard so much about you.
47
00:01:37,942 --> 00:01:40,642
Same. M-Minus the karate skills.
48
00:01:40,644 --> 00:01:43,378
Brad, this is crazy.
What are you doing here?
49
00:01:43,380 --> 00:01:44,746
Well, ever since I downloaded
50
00:01:44,748 --> 00:01:46,748
Lin-Manuel Miranda
as my new navigation voice,
51
00:01:46,750 --> 00:01:48,416
I've been dying to take a road trip,
52
00:01:48,418 --> 00:01:49,751
and who better to visit than you?
53
00:01:49,753 --> 00:01:51,286
Oh, I can't believe you're really here!
54
00:01:51,288 --> 00:01:52,621
Are you gonna stay the whole weekend?
55
00:01:52,623 --> 00:01:54,089
You have to. I want to show you
the whole campus.
56
00:01:54,091 --> 00:01:56,724
Love to. Maybe we could start
with the ice machine.
57
00:01:59,662 --> 00:02:00,995
Hey, would you grab me a napkin
58
00:02:00,997 --> 00:02:02,697
and help me fill out
these insurance forms?
59
00:02:02,699 --> 00:02:04,031
Sure!
60
00:02:04,033 --> 00:02:06,101
By "grab you a napkin",
you mean get myself a beer,
61
00:02:06,103 --> 00:02:07,502
and by "fill out insurance forms,"
62
00:02:07,504 --> 00:02:09,204
you mean go watch TV.
63
00:02:09,206 --> 00:02:10,805
Hey, you know, Axl's not gonna remember
64
00:02:10,807 --> 00:02:12,240
to fill out the forms we sent him,
65
00:02:12,242 --> 00:02:13,641
and since he's not talking to us,
66
00:02:13,643 --> 00:02:14,909
we have no way to remind him.
67
00:02:14,911 --> 00:02:16,243
♪ You're gonna love our pizza ♪
68
00:02:17,714 --> 00:02:19,981
Eh, don't worry about it.
I think he's on that.
69
00:02:19,983 --> 00:02:21,548
Well, how's that gonna play out?
70
00:02:21,550 --> 00:02:23,283
"Hey, Axl, you want to go out drinking?"
71
00:02:23,285 --> 00:02:24,551
"Uh, no, I'm just gonna stay home
72
00:02:24,553 --> 00:02:26,754
and fill out these insurance forms."
73
00:02:27,119 --> 00:02:28,388
He texted me.
74
00:02:28,390 --> 00:02:29,823
What?
75
00:02:29,825 --> 00:02:31,024
What do you mean he texted you?
76
00:02:31,026 --> 00:02:33,193
Yeah, he was working
on the forms the other day,
77
00:02:33,195 --> 00:02:35,295
and he asked if he
was allergic to penicillin.
78
00:02:36,665 --> 00:02:37,931
That cuts me like a knife.
79
00:02:37,933 --> 00:02:39,966
He really texted you a medical question
80
00:02:39,968 --> 00:02:41,067
instead of me?
81
00:02:41,069 --> 00:02:43,137
That is a shot across the bow.
82
00:02:43,139 --> 00:02:45,105
Okay. Wow. Message received.
83
00:02:45,107 --> 00:02:47,607
On the plus side, at least he
was filling out his own forms.
84
00:02:48,019 --> 00:02:50,576
Wait, you said
he texted you the other day.
85
00:02:50,578 --> 00:02:52,278
Why am I just finding out now?
86
00:02:52,280 --> 00:02:53,579
Frankie, it's not that big a deal.
87
00:02:53,581 --> 00:02:55,181
Then why wouldn't you
tell me he texted you?
88
00:02:55,183 --> 00:02:56,683
Why would you keep it a secret?
89
00:02:56,685 --> 00:02:59,052
Why wouldn't you tell me he
reached out to you and not me?
90
00:02:59,054 --> 00:03:01,320
- Huh? Why?
- Uh, 'cause of this?
91
00:03:01,322 --> 00:03:03,189
I'm sorry. I don't get why
I'm the bad guy.
92
00:03:03,191 --> 00:03:05,324
I mean, none of us like April.
We all said it.
93
00:03:05,326 --> 00:03:07,760
Mm, right, but you said it to him.
94
00:03:07,762 --> 00:03:09,529
Okay, yeah. I said it.
95
00:03:09,531 --> 00:03:11,397
But there's a whole list of things
96
00:03:11,399 --> 00:03:13,266
Axl said he doesn't like about me.
97
00:03:13,268 --> 00:03:15,901
I'm not kidding.
He literally made me a list.
98
00:03:15,903 --> 00:03:18,304
I'm sorry, but this is not okay!
99
00:03:18,306 --> 00:03:20,673
I mean, he's the one that
didn't show up at Thanksgiving.
100
00:03:20,675 --> 00:03:22,675
I should be mad at him, not him at me.
101
00:03:22,677 --> 00:03:23,709
Okay, that's it. You know what?
102
00:03:23,711 --> 00:03:25,610
I'm gonna write him an e-mail.
103
00:03:25,612 --> 00:03:27,980
You really need to send an e-mail?
104
00:03:27,982 --> 00:03:30,482
You sure this isn't something
frosting could solve?
105
00:03:34,621 --> 00:03:36,655
So... here it is.
106
00:03:36,657 --> 00:03:38,356
Wow.
107
00:03:38,358 --> 00:03:40,192
It's nice.
108
00:03:40,194 --> 00:03:42,093
Very bus-station chic.
109
00:03:42,095 --> 00:03:43,562
I know it's crappy.
110
00:03:43,564 --> 00:03:45,230
It's just temporary housing.
111
00:03:45,232 --> 00:03:47,232
It's like a holding bin for students
112
00:03:47,234 --> 00:03:48,600
until they find their forever room.
113
00:03:48,602 --> 00:03:51,102
Well, it's not the room,
it's the people in the room.
114
00:03:51,104 --> 00:03:53,171
Yeah, we don't really know
anyone in the room.
115
00:03:53,173 --> 00:03:55,272
You never know when someone's
gonna get "the call,"
116
00:03:55,274 --> 00:03:56,841
so we try not to get too attached.
117
00:03:56,843 --> 00:03:58,209
It's kind of the rules of the Bin.
118
00:03:58,211 --> 00:03:59,210
Mm.
119
00:03:59,212 --> 00:04:01,179
Okay, tell me everything.
120
00:04:01,181 --> 00:04:02,914
How is NYU? How's New York?
121
00:04:02,916 --> 00:04:04,615
NYU is awesome, and New York is amazing.
122
00:04:04,617 --> 00:04:06,918
You can get a hot pretzel
literally any time of the day.
123
00:04:06,920 --> 00:04:08,152
No.
124
00:04:08,154 --> 00:04:09,486
- Pick a time of the day, Sue.
- 2:00 a.m.
125
00:04:09,488 --> 00:04:10,654
- You can get a pretzel.
- Shut up!
126
00:04:10,656 --> 00:04:12,789
And New Yorkers don't say pop,
they say soda.
127
00:04:12,791 --> 00:04:14,958
And they don't say purse,
they say pocketbook!
128
00:04:14,960 --> 00:04:17,894
So I can buy a soda
with money from my pocketbook?
129
00:04:17,896 --> 00:04:20,063
- You'd fit right in.
- Ahh! Have you seen any celebrities?
130
00:04:20,065 --> 00:04:22,333
I'm pretty sure I saw
Greg Kinnear at a Starbucks.
131
00:04:22,335 --> 00:04:24,735
But I briefly blacked out.
When I came to, he was gone.
132
00:04:24,737 --> 00:04:25,736
- Oh.
- Oh, shut up, Brad.
133
00:04:25,738 --> 00:04:27,204
Here I am going on and on about myself
134
00:04:27,206 --> 00:04:28,839
and I haven't even asked
how you're doing.
135
00:04:28,841 --> 00:04:31,174
Actually, Brad, not so good.
136
00:04:31,176 --> 00:04:34,010
I'm living in a bin
and my family's falling apart.
137
00:04:34,012 --> 00:04:35,112
What?
138
00:04:35,114 --> 00:04:36,579
Wait, "Judge Joe Brown" falling apart
139
00:04:36,581 --> 00:04:38,681
or "Dr. Phil" falling apart?
140
00:04:38,683 --> 00:04:40,784
Axl's got this girlfriend
nobody likes and it all blew up
141
00:04:40,786 --> 00:04:42,318
and he didn't come home for Thanksgiving
142
00:04:42,320 --> 00:04:43,486
and my mom is devastated,
143
00:04:43,488 --> 00:04:44,587
and I'm not sure if I'm supposed
144
00:04:44,589 --> 00:04:46,789
to be talking to Axl
or not talking to Axl.
145
00:04:46,791 --> 00:04:50,092
It's all just very stressful.
There is so much drama.
146
00:04:50,094 --> 00:04:51,394
Sue, look at me.
147
00:04:51,396 --> 00:04:52,928
I am looking at you.
148
00:04:52,930 --> 00:04:54,330
I am here for you.
149
00:04:54,332 --> 00:04:56,332
And I'm gonna help you
forget all your troubles.
150
00:04:56,334 --> 00:04:57,933
With everything you've been through,
151
00:04:57,935 --> 00:04:59,268
you deserve to have some fun.
152
00:04:59,270 --> 00:05:01,270
They say New York
is the city that never sleeps,
153
00:05:01,272 --> 00:05:02,905
but tonight, that's gonna be Gumford.
154
00:05:02,907 --> 00:05:03,839
Really?
155
00:05:03,841 --> 00:05:05,207
Most stuff closes at 10:00,
156
00:05:05,209 --> 00:05:07,143
but the 24-hour mini-mart
closes at 11:00.
157
00:05:07,145 --> 00:05:09,011
Oh!
158
00:05:09,013 --> 00:05:10,746
Oh, yeah, yeah.
159
00:05:10,748 --> 00:05:11,747
Yeah!
160
00:05:13,584 --> 00:05:16,318
Okay, I wrote Axl an e-mail.
Listen to this.
161
00:05:16,320 --> 00:05:17,653
"How dare you?"
162
00:05:17,655 --> 00:05:18,887
Off to a great start.
163
00:05:18,889 --> 00:05:20,322
"Yes, things may have been said
164
00:05:20,324 --> 00:05:21,757
and feelings may have been hurt,
165
00:05:21,759 --> 00:05:23,325
but to not show up for Thanksgiving
166
00:05:23,327 --> 00:05:25,126
without so much as a phone call?
167
00:05:25,128 --> 00:05:26,328
I am outraged!
168
00:05:26,330 --> 00:05:27,829
Yes, that's right, outraged!
169
00:05:27,831 --> 00:05:29,731
So you listen here, you little punk..."
170
00:05:29,733 --> 00:05:31,365
Are you sure you're happy with the tone?
171
00:05:31,367 --> 00:05:32,733
Tone? What tone?
172
00:05:32,735 --> 00:05:34,969
"Listen, you little punk,
I've got two other kids,
173
00:05:34,971 --> 00:05:37,038
so if you think..."
Yeah, I'm hearing it now.
174
00:05:37,040 --> 00:05:38,406
I'm gonna tweak this.
175
00:05:38,408 --> 00:05:39,908
So, over the next few days,
176
00:05:39,910 --> 00:05:41,943
I tried to find the right tone.
177
00:05:41,945 --> 00:05:46,614
Axl, I am truly sorry for
the things I said about April,
178
00:05:46,616 --> 00:05:49,483
and I just want you to know
that I miss you every day.
179
00:05:49,485 --> 00:05:51,251
I can't stop thinking about...
180
00:05:51,253 --> 00:05:52,753
...what a jerk you're being.
181
00:05:52,755 --> 00:05:54,221
And to be perfectly honest,
182
00:05:54,223 --> 00:05:57,057
I'm not so sure I want
to be around such a...
183
00:05:57,059 --> 00:06:00,227
...sweet, loving boy
who lights up my life...
184
00:06:00,229 --> 00:06:01,629
...that I gave you,
185
00:06:01,631 --> 00:06:03,364
which you obviously don't appreciate.
186
00:06:03,366 --> 00:06:05,199
I guess you just don't care about that.
187
00:06:05,201 --> 00:06:06,633
But I can guarantee you this...
188
00:06:06,635 --> 00:06:08,836
you're gonna be so sad when I'm dead."
189
00:06:12,908 --> 00:06:15,742
Okay. I think I nailed it.
190
00:06:15,744 --> 00:06:17,311
"Dear Axl."
191
00:06:17,313 --> 00:06:18,245
Better.
192
00:06:18,750 --> 00:06:20,314
"When emotions run high,
193
00:06:20,316 --> 00:06:22,349
things can sometimes get out of hand,
194
00:06:22,351 --> 00:06:25,385
so I just wanted
to be clear and simple...
195
00:06:25,387 --> 00:06:28,321
I am not the only one
who hates your girlfriend.
196
00:06:28,323 --> 00:06:30,289
Your father hates her, Sue hates her,
197
00:06:30,291 --> 00:06:32,492
Brick hates her, we all hate her."
198
00:06:33,729 --> 00:06:36,128
But you do!
199
00:06:36,130 --> 00:06:38,070
This is so hard.
200
00:06:43,141 --> 00:06:44,307
- Shh!
- That was so much fun.
201
00:06:44,309 --> 00:06:45,976
I had no idea Gumford
had such great karaoke bars.
202
00:06:45,978 --> 00:06:47,377
Brad, that wasn't a karaoke bar.
203
00:06:47,379 --> 00:06:48,711
You just started singing.
204
00:06:48,713 --> 00:06:50,847
Hey, if you don't want it
to be a karaoke bar,
205
00:06:50,849 --> 00:06:51,881
don't play Katy Perry.
206
00:06:53,418 --> 00:06:55,184
Hey!
207
00:06:55,186 --> 00:06:56,486
Lights out.
208
00:06:56,488 --> 00:06:59,547
There's no talking in the Bin
after midnight.
209
00:06:59,583 --> 00:07:00,382
Agh!
210
00:07:01,370 --> 00:07:04,404
And no personal effects
or decorations, either.
211
00:07:04,406 --> 00:07:06,039
We're not scraping tape off the bunks
212
00:07:06,041 --> 00:07:07,407
for a bunch of bin people.
213
00:07:12,848 --> 00:07:14,869
No, no, no. No more.
214
00:07:15,056 --> 00:07:16,723
You are not gonna live like this.
215
00:07:16,725 --> 00:07:18,691
Telling Sue Heck
not to decorate her room
216
00:07:18,693 --> 00:07:20,626
is like telling Michael Phelps
not to get wet.
217
00:07:20,628 --> 00:07:22,595
Sue, give me that picture.
218
00:07:22,597 --> 00:07:23,862
Are you gonna put it back up?
219
00:07:23,864 --> 00:07:25,864
Oh, we're gonna do more than that.
220
00:07:25,866 --> 00:07:27,666
Give me a glue stick.
221
00:07:30,137 --> 00:07:31,537
Regular or glitter?
222
00:07:31,539 --> 00:07:32,804
What do you think?
223
00:07:34,275 --> 00:07:36,041
Glitter. Okay, cool.
224
00:07:44,417 --> 00:07:46,351
Oh, my God. What happened?
225
00:07:46,353 --> 00:07:47,452
Oh, nothing.
226
00:07:47,454 --> 00:07:48,787
Sue and I just decided to give the room
227
00:07:48,789 --> 00:07:49,788
a little zhuzh.
228
00:07:49,790 --> 00:07:50,789
Brad's right.
229
00:07:50,791 --> 00:07:52,758
We may only be here temporarily,
230
00:07:52,760 --> 00:07:54,925
but we are still here!
231
00:07:54,927 --> 00:07:56,527
And there is no reason why we shouldn't
232
00:07:56,529 --> 00:07:57,703
get to know each other.
233
00:07:58,831 --> 00:08:00,309
My name is Sue.
234
00:08:01,464 --> 00:08:03,164
And I know you must have a name.
235
00:08:03,166 --> 00:08:05,432
You are not just
"Guy Who Farts in His sleep."
236
00:08:05,434 --> 00:08:06,949
I'm Scott.
237
00:08:07,670 --> 00:08:11,171
Everybody, "Guy Who Farts
in His Sleep" is Scott.
238
00:08:11,173 --> 00:08:12,372
Hey! Scott!
239
00:08:12,374 --> 00:08:14,841
And you are not
"Owns Too Many Turtlenecks."
240
00:08:14,843 --> 00:08:15,542
You are...
241
00:08:15,544 --> 00:08:17,223
Marcy.
242
00:08:17,946 --> 00:08:19,980
And you are not "Scary Quiet Guy."
243
00:08:19,982 --> 00:08:20,947
You are...
244
00:08:22,785 --> 00:08:24,184
Okay, we'll come back to you.
245
00:08:24,186 --> 00:08:27,253
Yeah! And stop calling us bin people!
246
00:08:27,255 --> 00:08:29,422
"Indian Harry Styles" is right!
247
00:08:29,424 --> 00:08:33,789
We may be bin people,
but we are people people first!
248
00:08:33,816 --> 00:08:35,150
Give it up for "Retainer Drooler!"
249
00:08:35,152 --> 00:08:36,317
She speaks the truth!
250
00:08:42,382 --> 00:08:43,291
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!
251
00:08:46,563 --> 00:08:47,762
You know the Bin rules.
252
00:08:47,764 --> 00:08:50,191
What the hell is going on in here?
253
00:08:51,568 --> 00:08:53,568
I'll tell you what's going on here, Dan.
254
00:08:53,570 --> 00:08:57,071
We are students
enjoying student activities
255
00:08:57,073 --> 00:09:02,167
at our university
which our parents pay for!
256
00:09:02,744 --> 00:09:04,078
- Yeah! Yeah!
- Yeah! Yeah!
257
00:09:04,080 --> 00:09:06,180
Yeah! We have rights.
258
00:09:06,182 --> 00:09:09,383
We may be temporarily housed
in temporary housing,
259
00:09:09,385 --> 00:09:12,453
but we are not temporary people!
260
00:09:12,455 --> 00:09:16,056
So I suggest you climb onboard
to the new Bin rules, Dan!
261
00:09:16,058 --> 00:09:19,225
Or the only thing not allowed
in the Bin is you!
262
00:09:24,066 --> 00:09:25,364
Whatever.
263
00:09:25,366 --> 00:09:28,201
I'm doing a semester abroad
next year, anyway.
264
00:09:32,340 --> 00:09:33,639
- ♪ But everybody's talkin' about
the breakdown ♪ -
265
00:09:33,641 --> 00:09:36,242
Oh, thank you so much, Brad.
266
00:09:36,244 --> 00:09:38,244
This weekend has just been
the best ever,
267
00:09:38,246 --> 00:09:40,179
and you are amazing.
268
00:09:40,181 --> 00:09:41,814
Oh, I can't believe you have to leave.
269
00:09:41,816 --> 00:09:43,149
You never should have come here
270
00:09:43,151 --> 00:09:44,783
because now I know how much I miss you.
271
00:09:44,785 --> 00:09:47,853
You know, I only have
one class tomorrow.
272
00:09:47,855 --> 00:09:49,888
I guess maybe I could stay one more day?
273
00:09:49,890 --> 00:09:51,423
- ♪ Just smile if you're having
fun tonight ♪ -
274
00:09:58,332 --> 00:10:00,866
Heh. Check it out. Potato snowman.
275
00:10:02,637 --> 00:10:05,337
Oh, look! This one has legs.
276
00:10:05,339 --> 00:10:07,972
And it's anatomically correct.
277
00:10:07,974 --> 00:10:10,074
Put some shorts on that thing!
278
00:10:10,076 --> 00:10:12,511
Oh, you know who would love this?
279
00:10:12,513 --> 00:10:13,612
Axl!
280
00:10:13,614 --> 00:10:14,746
I've been looking for the perfect way
281
00:10:14,748 --> 00:10:16,314
to break the ice, and this is it.
282
00:10:16,316 --> 00:10:18,116
I'm gonna text him a picture of it.
283
00:10:18,118 --> 00:10:19,384
He's gonna think it's hilarious.
284
00:10:19,386 --> 00:10:21,319
He won't be able to help himself.
285
00:10:21,321 --> 00:10:23,688
He'll text me back
with some funny comment.
286
00:10:23,690 --> 00:10:24,956
I'll reply with something witty.
287
00:10:24,958 --> 00:10:27,125
We'll both "LOL"
and smiley face each other,
288
00:10:27,127 --> 00:10:28,126
and before you know it,
289
00:10:28,128 --> 00:10:29,393
everything will be back to normal.
290
00:10:30,563 --> 00:10:32,429
You know, I was kind of mad at you
291
00:10:32,431 --> 00:10:33,698
when you couldn't help me
write the e-mail,
292
00:10:33,700 --> 00:10:35,432
but now I'm glad
you're completely useless.
293
00:10:35,434 --> 00:10:37,001
Glad to not be of service.
294
00:10:37,003 --> 00:10:39,170
♪You're gonna love our pizza ♪
295
00:10:39,172 --> 00:10:40,904
Hey, Mom. Do we have a hole punch?
296
00:10:40,906 --> 00:10:43,340
Brick, you've been singing
that commercial for days.
297
00:10:43,342 --> 00:10:46,009
Oh, crap. Is this some kind of new tick?
298
00:10:46,011 --> 00:10:47,578
♪ You're gonna love our pizza ♪
299
00:10:47,580 --> 00:10:48,945
Is what a new tick?
300
00:10:54,487 --> 00:10:56,853
So, who can tell me
what FDR said in response
301
00:10:56,855 --> 00:10:59,325
to the problems of The Great Depression?
302
00:10:59,992 --> 00:11:01,992
♪ You're gonna love our pizza ♪
303
00:11:03,328 --> 00:11:05,128
Think you're pretty funny, do you, Heck?
304
00:11:05,130 --> 00:11:06,997
♪ You're gonna love our pizza ♪
305
00:11:06,999 --> 00:11:08,331
No, I didn't get to finish.
306
00:11:08,333 --> 00:11:09,766
You know what else you're gonna love?
307
00:11:09,768 --> 00:11:11,234
You're gonna love
our principal's office.
308
00:11:16,311 --> 00:11:18,044
You didn't say
you were picking up a pizza.
309
00:11:18,046 --> 00:11:19,813
To be honest,
I don't even know why I got it.
310
00:11:20,917 --> 00:11:23,208
He still hasn't responded
to the dirty carrot, huh?
311
00:11:23,210 --> 00:11:25,384
No, and it's comedy gold.
312
00:11:25,386 --> 00:11:27,386
I mean, if carrot genitalia
won't fix this, Mike,
313
00:11:27,388 --> 00:11:28,588
I don't know what will.
314
00:11:28,590 --> 00:11:30,223
Felt like a winner to me.
315
00:11:30,225 --> 00:11:32,225
God, Mike.
316
00:11:32,227 --> 00:11:34,427
My son's not talking to me.
317
00:11:34,429 --> 00:11:36,729
I mean, really not talking to me.
318
00:11:36,731 --> 00:11:39,298
I can't pretend like this
is some little thing anymore.
319
00:11:39,300 --> 00:11:41,800
You know, you hear about these
families that are estranged,
320
00:11:41,802 --> 00:11:43,435
and you can't imagine
that happening to you,
321
00:11:43,437 --> 00:11:44,503
but it is.
322
00:11:44,505 --> 00:11:45,904
I mean, is this it?
323
00:11:45,906 --> 00:11:48,171
Do I not have a son anymore?
324
00:11:56,383 --> 00:11:57,950
Hey. Got a minute?
325
00:11:57,952 --> 00:12:00,918
Uh... sure. Yeah.
326
00:12:02,623 --> 00:12:03,721
Huh.
327
00:12:03,723 --> 00:12:05,357
Still got the hole in the roof, huh?
328
00:12:05,359 --> 00:12:06,525
Yeah.
329
00:12:06,527 --> 00:12:09,794
It was nice in the summer.
Winter, not so much.
330
00:12:09,796 --> 00:12:11,229
So, listen.
331
00:12:11,231 --> 00:12:14,666
I know things got pretty crazy
before Thanksgiving,
332
00:12:14,668 --> 00:12:16,734
but it's water under the bridge, right?
333
00:12:16,736 --> 00:12:18,602
You know your mom. She is how she is.
334
00:12:18,604 --> 00:12:21,105
Sometimes she says things
in the heat of the moment,
335
00:12:21,107 --> 00:12:25,710
but anyway, she's pretty upset
about the whole thing and...
336
00:12:25,712 --> 00:12:27,011
I don't know if you got it or not,
337
00:12:27,013 --> 00:12:28,479
but she sent you a picture of a carrot.
338
00:12:28,481 --> 00:12:30,481
Yeah, I got it. It's hilarious.
339
00:12:31,030 --> 00:12:32,015
- Great.
- If you could take a minute,
340
00:12:32,017 --> 00:12:34,051
shoot her back a text
about the carrot, it'd be...
341
00:12:34,053 --> 00:12:35,219
Nope.
342
00:12:36,789 --> 00:12:37,854
What do you mean no?
343
00:12:37,856 --> 00:12:39,423
I mean I'm not talking to her.
344
00:12:39,425 --> 00:12:40,724
She went too far this time.
345
00:12:40,726 --> 00:12:42,493
You can say anything you want about me,
346
00:12:42,495 --> 00:12:44,861
but you start taking shots
at my lady, we got a problem.
347
00:12:44,863 --> 00:12:47,398
You know what I'm saying?
No one talks crap about my lady!
348
00:12:47,400 --> 00:12:49,365
I hear you, but your mom is my lady,
349
00:12:49,367 --> 00:12:51,101
and I need you to cut her some slack.
350
00:12:51,103 --> 00:12:52,602
She's sorry about what she said,
351
00:12:52,604 --> 00:12:54,971
and she extended the dirty
carrot as a peace offering.
352
00:12:54,973 --> 00:12:56,573
The least you can do is accept it.
353
00:12:56,575 --> 00:12:58,108
Why should I?
354
00:12:58,110 --> 00:13:00,744
Because to not make
an inappropriate comment
355
00:13:00,746 --> 00:13:03,313
about the dirty carrot will be
disrespectful to your mother.
356
00:13:03,315 --> 00:13:05,047
Oh, if you're gonna
give lessons on disrespect,
357
00:13:05,049 --> 00:13:06,616
maybe you should
talk to your wife first.
358
00:13:06,618 --> 00:13:08,368
She insulted the girl that I love,
359
00:13:08,370 --> 00:13:09,552
the girl that changed my life!
360
00:13:09,554 --> 00:13:11,321
- Okay, take it down a notch.
- No, you take it down a notch!
361
00:13:11,323 --> 00:13:12,589
There are two Axls now...
362
00:13:12,591 --> 00:13:14,524
one before April and one after April.
363
00:13:14,526 --> 00:13:16,459
- Is there a third one I can talk to?
- You just don't get it.
364
00:13:16,461 --> 00:13:18,994
Just 'cause you and Mom are dead
behind the eyes doesn't mean I am.
365
00:13:18,996 --> 00:13:21,330
The other night, April and I
talked until the sun rose.
366
00:13:21,332 --> 00:13:22,598
No, I get it. Your girlfriend's great.
367
00:13:22,600 --> 00:13:24,066
But you know what? So is your mom.
368
00:13:24,068 --> 00:13:25,334
So text her about the carrot.
369
00:13:25,336 --> 00:13:26,869
I'm not asking you, I'm telling you.
370
00:13:26,871 --> 00:13:28,137
Yeah, and I'm not 5 anymore.
371
00:13:28,139 --> 00:13:30,039
I'm not gonna do it
just 'cause you tell me to.
372
00:13:30,041 --> 00:13:31,807
Text your mom about the dirty carrot.
373
00:13:31,809 --> 00:13:33,375
Do you know what April would say
374
00:13:33,377 --> 00:13:35,143
if she found out Mom had the audacity
375
00:13:35,145 --> 00:13:36,478
to say she wasn't smart?
376
00:13:36,480 --> 00:13:38,380
First you'd have to tell her
what "audacity" meant.
377
00:13:38,382 --> 00:13:40,215
What is that supposed to mean?
378
00:13:40,217 --> 00:13:41,783
It means your mom is right!
379
00:13:41,785 --> 00:13:43,952
Your girlfriend's as dumb
as a bag of hammers!
380
00:13:43,954 --> 00:13:44,986
And we all think so!
381
00:13:46,624 --> 00:13:48,657
I'm out.
382
00:13:48,659 --> 00:13:50,125
He's not talking to me anymore.
383
00:13:50,127 --> 00:13:52,526
And I took Sue and Brick down with me.
384
00:13:54,231 --> 00:13:55,263
He's not talking to me anymore.
385
00:13:55,265 --> 00:13:56,330
Canadian Tire's all about fun.
386
00:13:57,009 --> 00:13:57,975
Hey.
387
00:13:57,977 --> 00:14:00,043
I hear one of my favorite students
388
00:14:00,045 --> 00:14:03,674
is having some trouble
in the disciplinary department.
389
00:14:04,001 --> 00:14:05,267
Hey, Dr. Fulton.
390
00:14:05,269 --> 00:14:06,635
Hey, Brick.
391
00:14:06,637 --> 00:14:08,403
Hey, let's talk.
392
00:14:11,441 --> 00:14:14,676
So, why did Mrs. Roberts
send you down here?
393
00:14:14,678 --> 00:14:16,544
♪ You're gonna love our pizza ♪
394
00:14:16,546 --> 00:14:19,113
Well, I said, "You're gonna love
our pizza", and she got mad.
395
00:14:19,115 --> 00:14:20,448
- But when I...
- I'm gonna stop you
396
00:14:20,450 --> 00:14:21,816
right there for just a second.
397
00:14:21,818 --> 00:14:23,084
Did you hear yourself
398
00:14:23,086 --> 00:14:25,820
when you say,
"You're gonna love our pizza"?
399
00:14:25,822 --> 00:14:27,588
♪ You're gonna love our pizza ♪
400
00:14:27,590 --> 00:14:28,656
Did I just do it?
401
00:14:28,658 --> 00:14:30,024
Yeah. Yeah.
402
00:14:30,026 --> 00:14:32,093
You know, Brick,
you're new to high school,
403
00:14:32,095 --> 00:14:34,295
and a lot of the teachers
might not be hip yet
404
00:14:34,297 --> 00:14:38,166
to your... you know, your quirks
and your eccentricities.
405
00:14:38,168 --> 00:14:40,301
You know, and that's no problemo.
406
00:14:40,303 --> 00:14:41,968
You know, I-I'm happy
to give them the 411.
407
00:14:41,970 --> 00:14:44,438
But it's just...
You know, but in the meantime,
408
00:14:44,440 --> 00:14:46,407
how... how are things going
in your world?
409
00:14:46,409 --> 00:14:47,874
♪ You're gonna love our pizza ♪
410
00:14:47,876 --> 00:14:49,510
- Uh-huh.
- Mm, fine.
411
00:14:49,512 --> 00:14:50,944
Things are going well with Cindy.
412
00:14:50,946 --> 00:14:54,014
Sue and Axl are back at college.
Mom complains about work.
413
00:14:54,016 --> 00:14:55,816
She and Axl aren't speaking
to each other.
414
00:14:55,818 --> 00:14:58,151
Oh, and I recently found
"To Kill a Mockingbird"
415
00:14:58,153 --> 00:14:59,319
in a hardcover.
416
00:14:59,321 --> 00:15:01,054
I'm gonna back you up
just a little, sport.
417
00:15:01,056 --> 00:15:02,122
Uh, that thing you just said
418
00:15:02,124 --> 00:15:03,389
about your mom
and... and your brother...
419
00:15:03,391 --> 00:15:05,591
that sounds like kind of a big thing.
420
00:15:05,593 --> 00:15:06,960
No, not really.
421
00:15:06,962 --> 00:15:09,029
Sometimes I hear her crying
through the walls.
422
00:15:09,624 --> 00:15:12,032
You know, I think what's happening
423
00:15:12,034 --> 00:15:14,134
is that this situation at home
424
00:15:14,136 --> 00:15:17,236
is manifesting itself
in this repetitive phrase.
425
00:15:17,238 --> 00:15:18,705
♪ You're gonna love our pizza ♪
426
00:15:18,707 --> 00:15:19,706
What repetitive phrase?
427
00:15:21,643 --> 00:15:23,409
You know, Brick,
428
00:15:23,411 --> 00:15:26,813
all stress has certain trigger points.
429
00:15:26,815 --> 00:15:28,548
For me, it was finding out that Shelly
430
00:15:28,550 --> 00:15:30,916
was having a baby with her
butt-faced, ponytail husband.
431
00:15:30,918 --> 00:15:32,251
But the good news is,
432
00:15:32,253 --> 00:15:34,887
we... we all find ways to cope
and move on.
433
00:15:34,889 --> 00:15:37,256
For example, I'm...
I'm seeing this great new gal.
434
00:15:37,258 --> 00:15:39,358
Her name is Barbara,
but I call her Shelly.
435
00:15:39,360 --> 00:15:42,461
She's 68 years old,
but she's very youthful.
436
00:15:42,463 --> 00:15:43,695
Anywho,
437
00:15:43,697 --> 00:15:46,031
I think you need to find a way
to relieve some stress,
438
00:15:46,033 --> 00:15:48,400
you know, blow off some steam,
you know, have some fun.
439
00:15:48,402 --> 00:15:49,197
Hmm.
440
00:15:49,222 --> 00:15:51,269
That's why I always say
yes to mall-walking
441
00:15:51,271 --> 00:15:53,605
with Barbara-Shelly.
442
00:15:53,607 --> 00:15:55,574
She sets quite a brisk pace.
443
00:15:56,677 --> 00:15:58,109
You know, she's younger
than Mick Jagger.
444
00:15:58,111 --> 00:15:59,644
Who?
445
00:16:01,982 --> 00:16:03,548
The amazing thing about best friends
446
00:16:03,550 --> 00:16:06,217
is that they just seem to know
when you need them.
447
00:16:06,219 --> 00:16:08,152
They show up at the perfect time,
448
00:16:08,154 --> 00:16:10,121
and then, just like that, they're gone.
449
00:16:10,123 --> 00:16:12,723
Brad. What are you doing here?
450
00:16:12,725 --> 00:16:14,725
I was just being wistful about you.
451
00:16:14,727 --> 00:16:16,761
This just in... I decided
to stay one more day.
452
00:16:16,763 --> 00:16:18,696
Really? Are you sure?
453
00:16:18,698 --> 00:16:20,265
I mean... I mean, it's great
that you can stay,
454
00:16:20,267 --> 00:16:21,932
but you've already been here three days.
455
00:16:21,934 --> 00:16:23,401
Don't you need to go to class?
456
00:16:23,403 --> 00:16:24,902
Nothing's more important than my bestie.
457
00:16:24,904 --> 00:16:27,104
Plus tonight, I was thinking
we could have fondue party.
458
00:16:27,106 --> 00:16:29,273
But I don't even own a fondue pot.
459
00:16:29,275 --> 00:16:30,307
That's okay. I've got one in my car.
460
00:16:30,309 --> 00:16:31,776
Wait, Brad.
461
00:16:31,778 --> 00:16:33,110
You were only gonna be here
for the weekend.
462
00:16:33,112 --> 00:16:34,945
Why do you have
a fondue pot in your car?
463
00:16:34,947 --> 00:16:36,313
Uh, I think a better question is,
464
00:16:36,315 --> 00:16:38,081
"Why wouldn't I have
a fondue pot in my car?"
465
00:16:38,083 --> 00:16:40,284
And an even better question is,
"Why am I such a failure?"
466
00:16:40,286 --> 00:16:42,119
Sue, I dropped out of NYU! This
whole weekend's been a big lie!
467
00:16:42,121 --> 00:16:45,355
Except for the part about me always
traveling with a fondue pot.
468
00:16:45,357 --> 00:16:46,523
Wait. Wait, wait, wait, what?
469
00:16:46,525 --> 00:16:47,824
You dropped out?
470
00:16:47,826 --> 00:16:49,592
Yes, everything I own is in my car,
471
00:16:49,594 --> 00:16:51,628
and I haven't even told my parents yet.
472
00:16:51,630 --> 00:16:54,130
What? I don't get it.
NYU was your dream school.
473
00:16:54,132 --> 00:16:55,698
More like nightmare.
474
00:16:55,700 --> 00:16:57,700
Everyone there is so dark and intense.
475
00:16:57,702 --> 00:16:59,903
I just had such a different upbringing,
476
00:16:59,905 --> 00:17:01,805
a whole different training.
477
00:17:01,807 --> 00:17:03,506
"I coulda had class.
478
00:17:03,508 --> 00:17:05,975
I coulda been a contender.
I coulda been somebody!"
479
00:17:05,977 --> 00:17:07,444
Bigger?
480
00:17:07,446 --> 00:17:10,379
"I coulda been a contender!
I coulda been somebody!"
481
00:17:10,381 --> 00:17:11,847
Bigger!
482
00:17:11,849 --> 00:17:14,350
"I coulda been a contender!
I coulda been somebody!"
483
00:17:14,352 --> 00:17:15,818
I could say bigger,
484
00:17:15,820 --> 00:17:17,820
but I don't know if I could handle it!
485
00:17:19,523 --> 00:17:21,223
I've always been the star.
486
00:17:21,225 --> 00:17:22,925
I got Snoopy as a freshman
487
00:17:22,927 --> 00:17:24,660
when we did "You're a Good Man,
Charlie Brown."
488
00:17:24,662 --> 00:17:27,329
At Dollywood, I quickly went
from Cowboy #3
489
00:17:27,331 --> 00:17:29,130
- to Cowboy #2.
- Yeah!
490
00:17:29,132 --> 00:17:30,666
I mean, my ascent has been meteoric.
491
00:17:30,668 --> 00:17:32,801
But it was different at NYU.
492
00:17:32,803 --> 00:17:35,971
"I coulda been a contender.
I coulda been somebody!"
493
00:17:35,973 --> 00:17:37,005
Smaller.
494
00:17:38,809 --> 00:17:41,309
"I coulda been a contender.
I coulda been somebody."
495
00:17:41,311 --> 00:17:42,911
Smaller.
496
00:17:44,814 --> 00:17:47,349
"I coulda been a contender.
I coulda been somebody."
497
00:17:50,153 --> 00:17:52,020
I just don't fit in at all.
498
00:17:52,022 --> 00:17:53,221
Brad.
499
00:17:53,223 --> 00:17:55,156
You don't always love school right away.
500
00:17:55,158 --> 00:17:56,891
But you got to hang in there!
501
00:17:56,893 --> 00:17:58,626
I actually have a ton of posters
502
00:17:58,628 --> 00:18:00,027
that speak to exactly
what you're talking to,
503
00:18:00,029 --> 00:18:01,161
but they're all in storage.
504
00:18:01,163 --> 00:18:03,297
The point is,
the same thing happened to me
505
00:18:03,299 --> 00:18:04,999
when I first got to Gumford.
506
00:18:05,001 --> 00:18:06,400
But I don't like New York.
507
00:18:06,402 --> 00:18:07,702
Everything costs a zillion dollars.
508
00:18:07,704 --> 00:18:09,169
People are rude and pushy.
509
00:18:09,171 --> 00:18:11,438
I saw a guy once poop on the street.
510
00:18:11,440 --> 00:18:12,540
He didn't even try and hide it.
511
00:18:12,542 --> 00:18:14,609
He just looked at me like it was normal.
512
00:18:14,611 --> 00:18:15,643
I'm telling you, Sue,
513
00:18:15,645 --> 00:18:17,411
New York is nothing like "On The Town."
514
00:18:17,413 --> 00:18:18,778
I mean, the Bronx is up
and the Battery's down,
515
00:18:18,780 --> 00:18:19,779
but that's it.
516
00:18:19,781 --> 00:18:21,081
Wow.
517
00:18:21,083 --> 00:18:22,616
So what are you gonna do?
518
00:18:22,618 --> 00:18:23,650
I don't know.
519
00:18:23,652 --> 00:18:24,851
I guess I'll just listen to my dad
520
00:18:24,853 --> 00:18:26,253
and become a cop
or a construction worker.
521
00:18:26,255 --> 00:18:27,287
I've already got the outfits.
522
00:18:27,289 --> 00:18:29,823
Brad! Don't talk like that.
523
00:18:29,825 --> 00:18:34,594
You are one of the most amazing
and talented people I know.
524
00:18:34,596 --> 00:18:37,898
And, yes, you may not be deep or dark,
525
00:18:37,900 --> 00:18:40,501
but the world
already has enough darkness.
526
00:18:40,503 --> 00:18:44,538
So maybe you're not cut out
for the really heavy roles,
527
00:18:44,540 --> 00:18:48,610
but nobody will ever play
a better Snoopy than you.
528
00:18:48,612 --> 00:18:51,911
Nobody wants to see
Sir Ian McKellen play Snoopy.
529
00:18:51,913 --> 00:18:53,913
You are Snoopy!
530
00:18:53,915 --> 00:18:56,174
And the world needs Snoopy
more than ever.
531
00:18:57,236 --> 00:18:58,751
Brad, look at me.
532
00:18:58,753 --> 00:19:00,076
I am looking at you.
533
00:19:00,455 --> 00:19:03,289
It's not you
that wasn't ready for New York.
534
00:19:03,291 --> 00:19:06,058
It's New York that wasn't ready for you.
535
00:19:06,060 --> 00:19:07,192
You really think so?
536
00:19:07,194 --> 00:19:08,226
Oh, I know so.
537
00:19:08,228 --> 00:19:10,228
And you want to know what else I know?
538
00:19:10,230 --> 00:19:13,249
East Indy has a pretty amazing
theater department.
539
00:19:13,251 --> 00:19:15,333
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.
540
00:19:15,335 --> 00:19:18,270
And ever since
a friend of mine came to visit,
541
00:19:18,272 --> 00:19:21,607
temporary housing is super fun.
542
00:19:28,682 --> 00:19:31,583
Well got our statement
from the insurance company.
543
00:19:31,585 --> 00:19:33,618
The premium's higher than ever,
so apparently
544
00:19:33,620 --> 00:19:35,887
Life Mutual still thinks
Axl is part of our family.
545
00:19:35,889 --> 00:19:37,189
Really?
546
00:19:37,191 --> 00:19:39,156
Did Life Mutual say
he filled out the forms okay?
547
00:19:39,158 --> 00:19:40,758
Did Life Mutual mention how he's doing
548
00:19:40,760 --> 00:19:42,026
or if he misses us?
549
00:19:42,028 --> 00:19:44,195
I did not ask Life Mutual
any of those questions.
550
00:19:46,099 --> 00:19:47,498
Hey.
551
00:19:47,500 --> 00:19:49,333
It's okay. You're a great mom.
552
00:19:49,335 --> 00:19:50,768
He's gonna come home.
553
00:19:50,770 --> 00:19:52,604
He has to. His nunchucks are here.
554
00:19:52,606 --> 00:19:54,739
You think? 'Cause the waiting sucks.
555
00:19:54,741 --> 00:19:57,074
I miss him. Oh.
556
00:20:00,012 --> 00:20:02,512
It actually tastes worse than it looks.
557
00:20:02,514 --> 00:20:03,946
♪ You're gonna love our pizza ♪
558
00:20:03,948 --> 00:20:05,348
Yeah, well, beside the pizza,
559
00:20:05,350 --> 00:20:06,849
you still love me, right, Brick?
560
00:20:06,851 --> 00:20:07,950
Well, I thought so,
561
00:20:07,952 --> 00:20:09,852
but Dr. Fulton said I'm being torn apart
562
00:20:09,854 --> 00:20:10,987
by our family situation.
563
00:20:10,989 --> 00:20:12,489
Awesome.
564
00:20:12,491 --> 00:20:14,023
He told me if I want to
relieve my stress,
565
00:20:14,025 --> 00:20:15,458
I'm supposed to have more fun.
566
00:20:16,694 --> 00:20:18,094
You're at the wrong house for that.
567
00:20:18,096 --> 00:20:19,161
Now, hold on.
568
00:20:20,364 --> 00:20:22,496
He might have a point.
569
00:20:23,167 --> 00:20:25,134
Sometimes life gives you lemons...
570
00:20:25,136 --> 00:20:26,602
1, 2, 3.
571
00:20:26,604 --> 00:20:29,672
...and sometimes it gives you
freaky-looking lemons.
572
00:20:29,674 --> 00:20:32,574
It's what you do with them
that makes a difference.
573
00:20:34,845 --> 00:20:36,278
- Oh!
- Ooh!
574
00:20:36,280 --> 00:20:37,579
Right up the middle!
575
00:20:38,449 --> 00:20:40,048
Yay!
576
00:20:40,050 --> 00:20:41,950
Oh! Oh!
577
00:20:41,952 --> 00:20:43,852
Whoo-hoo!
578
00:20:46,089 --> 00:20:48,390
Oh! Whoo!
579
00:20:49,426 --> 00:20:50,925
Whoo!
580
00:20:52,929 --> 00:20:54,863
Whoo! Whoo!
581
00:20:54,865 --> 00:20:57,532
And that day,
we smashed the crap out of it.
582
00:20:57,534 --> 00:21:00,535
And we had fun.
583
00:21:00,537 --> 00:21:02,403
Whoo!
584
00:21:02,443 --> 00:21:08,060
Synced & corrected by -robtor-
www.addic7ed.com