1
00:00:01,406 --> 00:00:02,473
[Doorbell rings]
2
00:00:03,781 --> 00:00:06,028
- Hey, Cam.
- Louise, what are you doing here?
3
00:00:06,053 --> 00:00:07,945
You're not dropping out of the
league championship tonight, are you?
4
00:00:07,970 --> 00:00:10,194
Louise is dropping out of
the league championship?
5
00:00:10,219 --> 00:00:11,670
Did you shoot yourself in the leg again?
6
00:00:11,695 --> 00:00:13,772
Oh, my God, we're one win away
from my first sports trophy,
7
00:00:13,797 --> 00:00:14,991
and then this happens.
8
00:00:15,016 --> 00:00:16,639
All I said was "Hey, Cam."
9
00:00:16,664 --> 00:00:18,710
So, this year, I invited Mitchell
10
00:00:18,735 --> 00:00:21,444
to join my gay bowling
team... the Britney Spares.
11
00:00:21,469 --> 00:00:23,408
I came up with the team
name, I designed the shirts.
12
00:00:23,433 --> 00:00:24,799
It's not important who gets the credit.
13
00:00:24,824 --> 00:00:28,343
When we first started, my bowling
was, um... well, it was iffy.
14
00:00:28,368 --> 00:00:30,461
But then I practiced and I practiced
15
00:00:30,493 --> 00:00:33,874
until the shoe-rental
guy called me "decent."
16
00:00:34,394 --> 00:00:35,839
I'm not here as a teammate.
17
00:00:35,864 --> 00:00:38,064
- I'm here on official police business.
- What?
18
00:00:38,292 --> 00:00:40,433
Please tell me that is not you.
19
00:00:40,458 --> 00:00:41,613
Man: What is that?
20
00:00:41,638 --> 00:00:42,738
- [Gasps]
- [People scream]
21
00:00:42,763 --> 00:00:44,215
- Oh, no.
- [Children screaming]
22
00:00:44,461 --> 00:00:45,488
Oh.
23
00:00:45,513 --> 00:00:46,738
Oh.
24
00:00:49,131 --> 00:00:50,086
[Screams]
25
00:00:50,111 --> 00:00:51,124
Cameron: No, no, no.
26
00:00:51,171 --> 00:00:52,537
- Hmm.
- That's Fizbo...
27
00:00:52,562 --> 00:00:53,873
- Mm-hmm.
- ... with a scary mask.
28
00:00:53,898 --> 00:00:56,048
- That's clearly not me.
- It's not him.
29
00:00:56,073 --> 00:00:57,739
[Voice breaking] No! Who would do that?
30
00:00:57,764 --> 00:00:59,277
Who would take something so beautiful
31
00:00:59,302 --> 00:01:01,441
and turn it into something so ugly?
32
00:01:01,721 --> 00:01:03,220
How did the guy get the costume?
33
00:01:03,245 --> 00:01:04,564
Oh, who knows?
34
00:01:04,589 --> 00:01:06,115
[Normal voice] Your
father gave it to charity.
35
00:01:06,140 --> 00:01:07,569
By accident.
36
00:01:07,594 --> 00:01:09,019
How did I not hear that fight?
37
00:01:09,044 --> 00:01:10,340
Was I in town?
38
00:01:11,008 --> 00:01:12,607
All right, then, uh, case closed.
39
00:01:12,632 --> 00:01:13,910
I'll see you guys tonight.
40
00:01:13,934 --> 00:01:15,903
What? No "case closed."
41
00:01:15,928 --> 00:01:17,527
We haven't even found the perp!
42
00:01:17,552 --> 00:01:19,323
Look, the only reason I
was following up on this
43
00:01:19,348 --> 00:01:20,964
is 'cause I thought it might be you.
44
00:01:20,990 --> 00:01:22,699
Well, yeah, but we have
to get my costume back.
45
00:01:22,724 --> 00:01:24,433
We have to restore Fizbo's good name.
46
00:01:24,458 --> 00:01:26,590
Oh, but we're... we're still
gonna go bowling, right?
47
00:01:26,615 --> 00:01:27,643
Wow.
48
00:01:27,668 --> 00:01:29,042
You give away my beloved alter ego,
49
00:01:29,067 --> 00:01:30,765
and you won't even allow me 30 seconds
50
00:01:30,790 --> 00:01:32,445
to have an emotional reaction?
51
00:01:32,470 --> 00:01:34,281
Yeah. No, it sounded
fast as I was saying it.
52
00:01:34,306 --> 00:01:37,320
♪ ♪
53
00:01:43,573 --> 00:01:46,690
Synced and corrected by Aaronnmb
www.addic7ed.com
54
00:01:47,104 --> 00:01:50,479
And now for the finishing touch.
55
00:01:50,689 --> 00:01:52,589
Franks for Frank!
56
00:01:52,614 --> 00:01:54,721
Dad's bachelor party's gonna be epic.
57
00:01:54,746 --> 00:01:56,669
You couldn't see it. That's why... Boom!
58
00:01:56,694 --> 00:01:59,534
Chicken wraps, white wine, fudge.
59
00:01:59,559 --> 00:02:00,911
Is this a bachelor party
60
00:02:00,936 --> 00:02:03,557
or a party where ladies sit
around watching "The Bachelor"?
61
00:02:03,582 --> 00:02:05,768
And why did you get me a triple-XL?
62
00:02:05,793 --> 00:02:07,091
The lady said it'd shrink in the wash.
63
00:02:07,116 --> 00:02:08,806
- How's it gonna do in the trash?
- Jay.
64
00:02:08,831 --> 00:02:11,297
Kidding. I'll use it to wash my car.
65
00:02:11,366 --> 00:02:13,987
My dad is marrying my
old babysitter Lorraine,
66
00:02:14,012 --> 00:02:15,213
who has a son,
67
00:02:15,238 --> 00:02:19,198
which means that I am
finally getting a brother!
68
00:02:19,441 --> 00:02:21,151
When I was young, I
wanted a brother so much,
69
00:02:21,176 --> 00:02:22,948
my folks got me bunk beds.
70
00:02:22,989 --> 00:02:25,222
At night, I'd pretend he
was up there and talk to him,
71
00:02:25,247 --> 00:02:27,347
and when he didn't answer
back, I always just figured,
72
00:02:27,372 --> 00:02:30,159
"Well, Marty's in a mood again."
73
00:02:30,385 --> 00:02:32,565
[Rhythmic knock on door]
74
00:02:34,622 --> 00:02:36,807
Excuse me. Do you serve crabs here?
75
00:02:36,832 --> 00:02:38,480
We serve anyone.
76
00:02:38,505 --> 00:02:40,413
Jokes only get old because
they're good, right?
77
00:02:40,438 --> 00:02:41,634
[Both laugh]
78
00:02:41,659 --> 00:02:42,728
Nailed it.
79
00:02:42,753 --> 00:02:43,986
Phil, this is Ray.
80
00:02:44,011 --> 00:02:46,729
Wow. I guess we're gonna be brothers.
81
00:02:46,754 --> 00:02:47,944
Bring it in.
82
00:02:47,969 --> 00:02:49,674
- Ah. Oh!
- Oh! No.
83
00:02:49,699 --> 00:02:51,441
Oh! What's happening?
84
00:02:51,466 --> 00:02:53,232
We're brothers! Isn't
this what brothers do?
85
00:02:53,257 --> 00:02:54,894
I don't know, but I love it!
86
00:02:54,919 --> 00:02:56,019
Whoa!
87
00:02:56,210 --> 00:02:58,287
This guy totally tried
to touch my ding-dong.
88
00:02:58,312 --> 00:02:59,403
- Oh.
- [Laughs] I didn't know
89
00:02:59,428 --> 00:03:00,570
it was that kind of party.
90
00:03:00,595 --> 00:03:02,695
I guess you didn't see
the white wine and fudge.
91
00:03:02,720 --> 00:03:05,388
White wine? That's
not gonna get me there.
92
00:03:05,619 --> 00:03:06,985
- [Door opens]
- Am I the only one who sees me
93
00:03:07,010 --> 00:03:08,275
choking that guy out tonight?
94
00:03:08,348 --> 00:03:09,354
I don't know.
95
00:03:09,379 --> 00:03:10,777
I got a good feeling about Ray,
96
00:03:10,802 --> 00:03:12,152
and I-I felt a lot of him.
97
00:03:12,177 --> 00:03:13,863
He's just a little
wound up from the drive.
98
00:03:13,888 --> 00:03:16,816
I'm sure you'll find
he's a real solid citizen.
99
00:03:16,841 --> 00:03:17,940
[Laughs]
100
00:03:17,965 --> 00:03:20,199
The sap across the
hall left his door open.
101
00:03:20,224 --> 00:03:21,299
[Laughs]
- That's my room!
102
00:03:21,324 --> 00:03:24,102
Oh. So, I guess you'll need these.
103
00:03:24,204 --> 00:03:25,503
[Pills rattle]
104
00:03:25,973 --> 00:03:27,696
Before we start, thanks for agreeing
105
00:03:27,721 --> 00:03:29,750
to do this read through
of my latest play,
106
00:03:29,775 --> 00:03:31,919
"A Withering Farewell
Under a Harvest Moon"...
107
00:03:31,946 --> 00:03:34,144
- So catch...
- ... colon, "The Tears of Angels."
108
00:03:34,169 --> 00:03:35,918
- So catchy!
- Right?
109
00:03:35,943 --> 00:03:37,843
It's a story of four
women who come together
110
00:03:37,868 --> 00:03:39,514
to mourn the loss of
the family patriarch.
111
00:03:39,539 --> 00:03:41,879
Oh, no. So sad, so very sad.
112
00:03:41,904 --> 00:03:44,164
Pace yourself, crazy.
We haven't even started.
113
00:03:44,189 --> 00:03:45,828
A man died, Claire.
114
00:03:45,853 --> 00:03:46,885
A fake man,
115
00:03:46,910 --> 00:03:49,267
and if he was a patriarch,
he was a fake old man,
116
00:03:49,292 --> 00:03:50,471
and old men die.
117
00:03:50,496 --> 00:03:51,706
Claire: Surely, this is a thought
118
00:03:51,731 --> 00:03:54,485
that has occurred to you
from time to time, huh?
119
00:03:54,836 --> 00:03:56,110
Please don't make me part of this.
120
00:03:56,135 --> 00:03:57,234
Manny: Anyway, when it's over,
121
00:03:57,259 --> 00:03:58,625
feel free to share your thoughts...
122
00:03:58,650 --> 00:04:01,098
what you liked, what you
loved, but also the negatives...
123
00:04:01,123 --> 00:04:03,423
what went over your head,
any words you didn't know.
124
00:04:03,455 --> 00:04:06,256
I'm submitting my latest play
to a young playwrights festival,
125
00:04:06,281 --> 00:04:07,680
but I want to hear it out loud first
126
00:04:07,705 --> 00:04:09,694
to be sure I've hit
all my emotional marks.
127
00:04:09,814 --> 00:04:12,149
One might ask, "Why
all female characters?"
128
00:04:12,251 --> 00:04:14,624
Let's just say, write what
you know. [Clicks tongue]
129
00:04:14,797 --> 00:04:17,121
Wait. To clarify, I understand women.
130
00:04:17,146 --> 00:04:19,194
I don't feel like I am one.
131
00:04:20,350 --> 00:04:21,693
110 pages?
132
00:04:21,718 --> 00:04:23,093
What time are we supposed
to get out of here?
133
00:04:23,118 --> 00:04:24,671
Oh, honey, you got a hot date tonight?
134
00:04:24,696 --> 00:04:27,030
Mom, don't be mean. Ignore her.
135
00:04:27,055 --> 00:04:28,908
I actually am in a relationship,
136
00:04:28,933 --> 00:04:30,389
but I've been hiding it from everybody
137
00:04:30,414 --> 00:04:32,646
because I have once
again chosen somebody
138
00:04:32,671 --> 00:04:34,871
that is completely inappropriate.
139
00:04:35,062 --> 00:04:36,655
It's this older guy... Ben.
140
00:04:36,680 --> 00:04:40,315
He works for my mother, and
he lives with his mother.
141
00:04:40,545 --> 00:04:42,344
I'm like a moth to a flame
142
00:04:42,369 --> 00:04:44,647
if the flame is an
underachieving man-child
143
00:04:44,672 --> 00:04:47,374
with a Tasmanian Devil
tattoo on his butt.
144
00:04:47,453 --> 00:04:49,600
Sorry, this is going to
take longer than I expected.
145
00:04:49,625 --> 00:04:51,233
- Can you wait there?
- Sure.
146
00:04:51,258 --> 00:04:53,772
My mom's got her poker
girls over, anyway.
147
00:04:53,797 --> 00:04:56,544
This one lady, Karen, she gets
real handsy with me. [Chuckles]
148
00:04:56,569 --> 00:04:57,759
She's not un-hot, either.
149
00:04:57,784 --> 00:04:59,999
She's like an older, curvy...
150
00:05:00,024 --> 00:05:02,102
Emily Blunt but Indian.
151
00:05:02,127 --> 00:05:03,767
Don't try to make me jealous, Ben.
152
00:05:03,792 --> 00:05:05,139
One of my regulars at the coffee shop
153
00:05:05,164 --> 00:05:07,604
is always asking if I want
to do some motorboating.
154
00:05:07,629 --> 00:05:09,662
If I didn't get seasick, I'd go.
155
00:05:10,588 --> 00:05:13,088
Now, okay, I don't want
to get ahead of myself,
156
00:05:13,113 --> 00:05:15,241
but does the trophy
have each of our names,
157
00:05:15,266 --> 00:05:16,466
or is it just the team name,
158
00:05:16,491 --> 00:05:18,521
'cause I kind want one of my own, but...
159
00:05:18,546 --> 00:05:20,252
You know what? No, never mind.
I'll just get it engraved.
160
00:05:20,277 --> 00:05:21,799
Okay, how can you be thinking
161
00:05:21,824 --> 00:05:23,890
about bowling at a time like this?
162
00:05:23,915 --> 00:05:26,459
You mean as we're going in
to our bowling championship?
163
00:05:26,484 --> 00:05:27,525
[Cellphone chimes]
164
00:05:27,550 --> 00:05:28,711
Oh. Text message.
165
00:05:28,736 --> 00:05:30,744
- [Console beeps]
- Read text message.
166
00:05:30,769 --> 00:05:32,665
[Beep] Female voice: You
have a message from Martin.
167
00:05:32,690 --> 00:05:34,089
"I keep picturing you guys
168
00:05:34,158 --> 00:05:35,725
"holding the trophy later tonight.
169
00:05:35,750 --> 00:05:36,882
"Just kidding.
170
00:05:36,907 --> 00:05:39,121
"You're not invited to my victory party.
171
00:05:39,146 --> 00:05:40,154
"Ha ha."
172
00:05:40,179 --> 00:05:42,206
[Laughs]
173
00:05:42,231 --> 00:05:43,261
Oh.
174
00:05:43,925 --> 00:05:45,098
Hello, Martin.
175
00:05:45,138 --> 00:05:46,969
Hello, Cameron. Hello, Mitchell.
176
00:05:46,994 --> 00:05:48,432
Where's the rest of Britney Queers?
177
00:05:48,457 --> 00:05:51,058
It's the Britney Spares, Martin.
178
00:05:51,161 --> 00:05:52,866
The Britney Queers were
eliminated weeks ago.
179
00:05:52,891 --> 00:05:54,057
Yes, by us.
180
00:05:54,082 --> 00:05:56,682
Eventually, all will fall
to The Gay City Bowlers.
181
00:05:56,707 --> 00:05:58,549
I forget. Do all the
names have to be puns?
182
00:05:58,574 --> 00:05:59,944
Yes. It's like hair salons.
183
00:05:59,969 --> 00:06:01,679
Unpleasant as always, Martin.
184
00:06:01,704 --> 00:06:03,037
I'll see you in the alley.
185
00:06:03,139 --> 00:06:05,190
I'm sure you say that to a lot of men.
186
00:06:07,643 --> 00:06:09,287
[Gasps] Mitchell! Fizbo!
187
00:06:09,312 --> 00:06:10,812
- What?
- Over there!
188
00:06:10,880 --> 00:06:12,362
Cam... Cam, do you think it's possible
189
00:06:12,387 --> 00:06:14,348
with how upset you are about Fizbo
190
00:06:14,373 --> 00:06:15,895
that... that maybe you're seeing things?
191
00:06:15,920 --> 00:06:16,958
Oh. No.
192
00:06:16,983 --> 00:06:19,536
Maybe it's another guy with
purple hair and a size 23 shoe.
193
00:06:19,561 --> 00:06:21,864
Maybe Dennis Rodman bowls here!
194
00:06:26,026 --> 00:06:28,259
And we begin.
195
00:06:28,284 --> 00:06:30,708
"Lights up on the living
room of James Pickett.
196
00:06:30,733 --> 00:06:33,333
"The furnishings and art
tell us he was a wealthy man,
197
00:06:33,358 --> 00:06:34,825
"but his money couldn't buy taste.
198
00:06:34,850 --> 00:06:37,638
"Enter four women in black
returning from a funeral.
199
00:06:37,663 --> 00:06:39,904
"First, James' widow
Chloe Dubois-Pickett"...
200
00:06:39,929 --> 00:06:40,982
That's me!
201
00:06:41,007 --> 00:06:42,787
"... a beautiful French
commoner who married up."
202
00:06:42,812 --> 00:06:43,857
Ooh, là là.
203
00:06:43,882 --> 00:06:45,763
"Next is Bailey, the granddaughter...
204
00:06:45,788 --> 00:06:47,588
"cute as a button and just as smart."
205
00:06:47,656 --> 00:06:48,822
I like her.
206
00:06:48,857 --> 00:06:50,640
"Following her is James' sister,
207
00:06:50,665 --> 00:06:52,763
"Professor Alma Diller, 60s.
208
00:06:52,788 --> 00:06:54,271
"There's no problem she can't solve
209
00:06:54,296 --> 00:06:56,067
"except her own loneliness.
210
00:06:56,092 --> 00:06:57,935
"Finally, James' daughter Kate...
211
00:06:57,960 --> 00:07:00,483
"attractive, intense, sharp-tongued,
212
00:07:00,508 --> 00:07:01,904
"fleeting moments of warmth."
213
00:07:01,929 --> 00:07:03,750
"Fleeting moments of warmth"?
214
00:07:03,775 --> 00:07:04,993
[Scoffs] I get it.
215
00:07:05,018 --> 00:07:06,480
This is the story of the four of us
216
00:07:06,505 --> 00:07:08,324
through some sort of
distorted Manny lens.
217
00:07:08,349 --> 00:07:09,392
Yeah, just because I'm smart,
218
00:07:09,417 --> 00:07:10,736
- I end up a spinster?
- Mm-hmm.
219
00:07:10,761 --> 00:07:12,126
You know what I could be doing right now
220
00:07:12,151 --> 00:07:14,132
- if I didn't get seasick?
- Okay, calm down.
221
00:07:14,157 --> 00:07:15,669
These characters are a compilation
222
00:07:15,694 --> 00:07:18,022
of many other women I've
known, not you people.
223
00:07:18,047 --> 00:07:19,373
Okay, let's start.
224
00:07:19,398 --> 00:07:21,899
"Kate enters and crosses
straight to the credenza.
225
00:07:21,924 --> 00:07:24,921
"As she pours herself a
much-needed glass of wine"...
226
00:07:25,779 --> 00:07:26,819
Mm.
227
00:07:27,283 --> 00:07:28,311
Right.
228
00:07:28,336 --> 00:07:29,978
"To be honest, I can't believe
229
00:07:30,047 --> 00:07:32,277
"the old grump didn't die years ago."
230
00:07:32,302 --> 00:07:35,268
Nice. My first line is something
horrible about my dead dad.
231
00:07:35,293 --> 00:07:36,738
How cold do you think I am?
232
00:07:36,763 --> 00:07:38,181
Didn't I just say it's not you?
233
00:07:38,206 --> 00:07:39,309
[Chuckles]
234
00:07:39,334 --> 00:07:41,394
- Isn't it, though?
- What?
235
00:07:41,419 --> 00:07:44,353
"Old people die, get over it"?
236
00:07:44,614 --> 00:07:46,042
That was, like, 20 minutes ago.
237
00:07:46,067 --> 00:07:48,211
- Okay, now, hang on a second.
- Okay, this seems like a whole thing,
238
00:07:48,237 --> 00:07:49,691
so I'm just gonna go
grab a water real quick.
239
00:07:49,716 --> 00:07:51,278
- [Claire sighs]
- Oh, come on.
240
00:07:53,146 --> 00:07:54,896
- Who are you texting?
- Ahh! No one.
241
00:07:54,928 --> 00:07:56,114
I'm just reading my horoscope.
242
00:07:56,139 --> 00:07:58,262
Liar. Why would anyone read their
horoscope so late in the day?
243
00:07:58,287 --> 00:07:59,795
Everything's already happened.
244
00:08:00,122 --> 00:08:02,205
- There's a dude, isn't there?
- What? No.
245
00:08:02,230 --> 00:08:04,588
Sneaking off with your
phone, the clean hair,
246
00:08:04,613 --> 00:08:06,892
your one bra that
fits properly... spill.
247
00:08:06,978 --> 00:08:08,057
[Scoffs] Okay, fine.
248
00:08:08,082 --> 00:08:09,562
There is a dude.
249
00:08:09,587 --> 00:08:11,437
Oh, God, it's not another
high-school boy, is it?
250
00:08:11,462 --> 00:08:12,508
No. He's legal.
251
00:08:12,533 --> 00:08:14,499
He's just embarrassing
in a different way.
252
00:08:14,524 --> 00:08:16,241
You know you've been like
this your whole life...
253
00:08:16,266 --> 00:08:19,132
ashamed of the romantic,
sexual part of you.
254
00:08:19,157 --> 00:08:20,923
Honestly, it seems like you
think you don't deserve it,
255
00:08:20,958 --> 00:08:21,990
but you do.
256
00:08:22,015 --> 00:08:23,815
And if this guy is fun and good to you
257
00:08:23,840 --> 00:08:25,600
and doesn't ride a scooter,
258
00:08:26,013 --> 00:08:27,471
let it be okay.
259
00:08:27,705 --> 00:08:28,878
Haley.
260
00:08:29,249 --> 00:08:30,745
Thanks. [Chuckles]
261
00:08:30,770 --> 00:08:32,569
Manny: Ladies, I don't
know what emotional thing
262
00:08:32,594 --> 00:08:33,604
is playing out right now,
263
00:08:33,629 --> 00:08:35,404
but how about you
save it for over there?
264
00:08:35,429 --> 00:08:37,629
And then I sent you the cutest video
265
00:08:37,654 --> 00:08:40,034
of a puppy nursing on a mama lion,
266
00:08:40,059 --> 00:08:41,677
and what do you text back?
267
00:08:41,702 --> 00:08:43,004
"She's getting him fat
268
00:08:43,029 --> 00:08:44,954
"so that he tastes better at lunch"?
269
00:08:44,978 --> 00:08:47,251
Yeah, so what? My
crime is I'm hilarious?
270
00:08:47,276 --> 00:08:49,011
Can we get back to this, please?
271
00:08:49,036 --> 00:08:50,586
Kate just said she couldn't believe
272
00:08:50,611 --> 00:08:52,871
her father didn't die sooner, then...
273
00:08:52,896 --> 00:08:55,706
"The Widow Dubois slumps
in a chair, emotional."
274
00:08:55,731 --> 00:08:58,057
[Bad French accent] "Ohh, ma chérie,
275
00:08:58,280 --> 00:09:01,181
"your papa would be
devastated to hear you say
276
00:09:01,206 --> 00:09:03,239
"such insensitive things."
277
00:09:03,647 --> 00:09:04,646
Really?
278
00:09:04,671 --> 00:09:07,515
Are you gonna do the whole accent thing?
279
00:09:08,455 --> 00:09:10,290
Lo and behold...
280
00:09:10,671 --> 00:09:12,208
what do we see?
281
00:09:12,409 --> 00:09:14,463
The queen of spades is gone!
282
00:09:14,488 --> 00:09:15,952
Where could she be?
283
00:09:15,977 --> 00:09:18,323
In Frank's pocket. I
saw you put it there.
284
00:09:19,338 --> 00:09:20,904
So it is!
285
00:09:21,042 --> 00:09:22,662
Great trick, Phil.
286
00:09:22,759 --> 00:09:24,115
And nice assist, Ray.
287
00:09:24,140 --> 00:09:26,781
I thought this was supposed
to be a bachelor party.
288
00:09:26,806 --> 00:09:28,923
Where's the female entertainment?
289
00:09:28,948 --> 00:09:31,214
Oh, don't you worry about that.
290
00:09:31,274 --> 00:09:33,646
♪ Mr. Sandman ♪
291
00:09:33,671 --> 00:09:36,053
- ♪ Bring me a dream ♪
- ♪ Bum, bum, bum, bum ♪
292
00:09:36,078 --> 00:09:39,032
♪ Make him the cutest
that I've ever seen ♪
293
00:09:39,057 --> 00:09:40,152
♪ Bum, bum, bum, bum ♪
294
00:09:40,177 --> 00:09:41,448
♪ Give him two lips ♪
295
00:09:41,473 --> 00:09:44,045
- ♪ Like roses and clover ♪
- ♪ Bum, bum, bum, bum ♪
296
00:09:44,070 --> 00:09:45,988
♪ And tell him that his
lonesome nights are... ♪
297
00:09:46,013 --> 00:09:47,281
- [Music stops]
- What are you doing?!
298
00:09:47,306 --> 00:09:48,773
Calling time of death.
299
00:09:48,798 --> 00:09:49,840
Oh, not you ladies.
300
00:09:49,865 --> 00:09:51,598
You're still very vital, of course.
301
00:09:51,623 --> 00:09:52,655
Hey, we really appreciate
302
00:09:52,680 --> 00:09:54,741
all the riveting you did during the war.
303
00:09:54,766 --> 00:09:56,233
Dad was enjoying them.
304
00:09:56,258 --> 00:09:57,958
Just as well. [Laughs]
305
00:09:57,983 --> 00:09:59,149
I'm about to be married.
306
00:09:59,174 --> 00:10:00,243
I don't need to be tempted
307
00:10:00,268 --> 00:10:02,301
by all those bum, bum, bums.
308
00:10:02,326 --> 00:10:04,543
Oh, is that it for
the planned activities?
309
00:10:04,568 --> 00:10:06,123
No, we're just getting started.
310
00:10:06,148 --> 00:10:08,988
For the next hour, it's
a $5 buy-in game of Uno,
311
00:10:09,013 --> 00:10:11,236
then downstairs to Captain Scupper's,
312
00:10:11,261 --> 00:10:13,092
the best oysters in the desert.
313
00:10:13,117 --> 00:10:15,398
And finally, put on
your neckties, gentlemen,
314
00:10:15,423 --> 00:10:17,111
'cause I have four balcony seats...
315
00:10:17,136 --> 00:10:18,882
to Mr. Neil...
316
00:10:18,907 --> 00:10:21,156
- Please say "Diamond."
- ... Sedaka.
317
00:10:21,181 --> 00:10:22,440
What a night!
318
00:10:22,465 --> 00:10:24,031
Oh, we need some ice.
319
00:10:24,056 --> 00:10:25,586
I'll be right back.
320
00:10:25,611 --> 00:10:26,643
What the hell's Uno?
321
00:10:26,668 --> 00:10:28,869
Sort of a thinking man's Crazy Eights.
322
00:10:28,894 --> 00:10:30,732
Instead of playing cards up here,
323
00:10:30,757 --> 00:10:33,015
there is a casino downstairs
324
00:10:33,040 --> 00:10:34,626
with actual big-boy drinks.
325
00:10:34,651 --> 00:10:36,012
I'm right behind him.
326
00:10:36,095 --> 00:10:37,766
We'll grab Phil on the way.
327
00:10:37,791 --> 00:10:40,531
Or wouldn't it be fun for him...
328
00:10:40,556 --> 00:10:42,281
to try and find us?
329
00:10:42,306 --> 00:10:44,508
Frank: Oh, he'll love that!
330
00:10:45,372 --> 00:10:46,539
- [Pins clatter]
- Hey, Louise,
331
00:10:46,571 --> 00:10:48,279
I just saw that psycho imposter clown
332
00:10:48,304 --> 00:10:50,149
out by the dumpster giving
me threatening looks.
333
00:10:50,173 --> 00:10:51,739
- Look, Flouncy...
- It's Fizbo.
334
00:10:51,764 --> 00:10:52,897
I'm talking to you.
335
00:10:52,922 --> 00:10:55,500
I don't have time for
your clown nonsense.
336
00:10:55,525 --> 00:10:57,168
We've got a championship to win.
337
00:10:57,193 --> 00:10:59,323
I'm gonna go warm up
with the Pindigo Girls.
338
00:11:00,515 --> 00:11:02,615
Why does this have
to be happening today?
339
00:11:03,123 --> 00:11:04,393
Mitchell,
340
00:11:04,418 --> 00:11:07,201
maybe it's happening because it's today.
341
00:11:07,226 --> 00:11:09,453
Maybe somebody is
trying to get in my head
342
00:11:09,478 --> 00:11:10,877
to throw me off my game.
343
00:11:10,902 --> 00:11:13,002
Oh, honey, do you really
think people care enough to...
344
00:11:13,027 --> 00:11:15,532
Hey, you know what, there are
six people just in my eyesight
345
00:11:15,557 --> 00:11:17,688
that would do anything to
break my winning streak.
346
00:11:17,713 --> 00:11:19,780
For instance, Martin.
347
00:11:20,840 --> 00:11:22,433
He's never forgiven
me for making him feel
348
00:11:22,458 --> 00:11:23,591
like your father was in love with him.
349
00:11:23,616 --> 00:11:24,615
Okay, it couldn't have been Martin.
350
00:11:24,640 --> 00:11:26,688
We saw him, like, three seconds
before you thought that you saw Fiz...
351
00:11:26,713 --> 00:11:27,745
- Actually saw.
- Okay.
352
00:11:27,770 --> 00:11:28,781
And what's this about my dad?
353
00:11:28,806 --> 00:11:30,456
Fine. It's not Martin.
354
00:11:30,511 --> 00:11:32,744
But it certainly could be Señor Kaplan.
355
00:11:32,782 --> 00:11:35,849
Uno, dos, tres, cuatro, cinco, seis.
356
00:11:36,445 --> 00:11:38,295
Hola, Señor Kaplan.
357
00:11:38,364 --> 00:11:40,104
If you're here to talk
trash, I'm not interested.
358
00:11:40,130 --> 00:11:41,147
Where were you 20 minutes ago,
359
00:11:41,172 --> 00:11:42,800
and can anybody account
for your whereabouts?
360
00:11:42,825 --> 00:11:43,992
Not that it's any of your business,
361
00:11:44,017 --> 00:11:46,407
but I happened to be in the
photo booth taking some solos.
362
00:11:46,595 --> 00:11:48,328
I'm gonna use number
three for my new passport.
363
00:11:48,353 --> 00:11:50,205
I would use number two.
There's a twinkle in your eye.
364
00:11:50,229 --> 00:11:51,461
But I have a different theory
365
00:11:51,486 --> 00:11:52,785
as to where you were 20 minutes ago,
366
00:11:52,810 --> 00:11:55,239
and it would have given
you exactly enough time
367
00:11:55,264 --> 00:11:58,077
to change out of a clown
costume into your bowling outf...
368
00:11:58,103 --> 00:11:59,334
[Screams]
369
00:12:00,304 --> 00:12:01,581
- What's wrong?
- Wha... No. No, no.
370
00:12:01,606 --> 00:12:02,973
I just saw... I just saw Fi... Fizbo
371
00:12:03,041 --> 00:12:04,276
in... in... in the mirror.
372
00:12:04,301 --> 00:12:05,886
I don't know what's
going on with you, Tucker,
373
00:12:05,911 --> 00:12:07,602
but in my culture, we like to call it...
374
00:12:07,627 --> 00:12:09,561
loco en la cabeza.
375
00:12:09,586 --> 00:12:11,796
Okay, you know what? Knock
it off. You're Canadian.
376
00:12:15,601 --> 00:12:17,672
"You all seem to forget I'm not alone.
377
00:12:17,697 --> 00:12:19,070
"I have Albert.
378
00:12:19,095 --> 00:12:20,989
"You can search the
world, and I defy you
379
00:12:21,014 --> 00:12:23,592
"to find a more devoted, loving...
380
00:12:24,269 --> 00:12:25,367
"parrot."
381
00:12:25,544 --> 00:12:27,443
"I used to like talking to Albert,
382
00:12:27,468 --> 00:12:29,753
"but then we got into
a fight over a cracker."
383
00:12:29,778 --> 00:12:32,185
"Kate whispers to Bailey
as they watch the Widow
384
00:12:32,210 --> 00:12:34,209
"sadly plunking notes on the piano."
385
00:12:34,234 --> 00:12:36,558
"How long do we have to stay with her?
386
00:12:36,583 --> 00:12:38,440
"We can leave now, right?"
387
00:12:38,465 --> 00:12:40,167
Gloria: [Bad French accent]
"I knew when your papa died,
388
00:12:40,192 --> 00:12:42,394
"I would never see you again."
389
00:12:42,419 --> 00:12:44,477
[Sighs] "No matter what I do,
390
00:12:44,502 --> 00:12:46,111
"you refuse to accept
391
00:12:46,156 --> 00:12:48,417
"that I accepted you."
392
00:12:48,442 --> 00:12:49,462
"Mais non.
393
00:12:49,487 --> 00:12:50,486
"I'm sorry.
394
00:12:50,511 --> 00:12:52,788
"I'm just so emotional today."
395
00:12:52,813 --> 00:12:54,713
"But of course you are, Chloe.
396
00:12:54,738 --> 00:12:58,013
"And I'm sorry if I made
you feel like an outsider."
397
00:12:58,038 --> 00:13:00,985
"I love you, you know? Je t'aime."
398
00:13:01,395 --> 00:13:02,834
"I love you, too."
399
00:13:03,003 --> 00:13:04,050
[Voice breaking] Black out.
400
00:13:04,118 --> 00:13:05,784
[Normal voice] Bravo! Bravo!
401
00:13:05,809 --> 00:13:06,858
Really, Manny?
402
00:13:06,883 --> 00:13:09,465
My character gets into a fight
with a parrot over a cracker?
403
00:13:09,490 --> 00:13:11,443
[Hushed] I told you
that story in confidence.
404
00:13:12,084 --> 00:13:13,638
And for the record...
405
00:13:13,991 --> 00:13:16,225
I am nothing like my character.
406
00:13:16,250 --> 00:13:17,289
I'm not lonely at all.
407
00:13:17,314 --> 00:13:18,874
I have tons of options.
408
00:13:18,899 --> 00:13:20,129
I'm actually going to see one right now.
409
00:13:20,154 --> 00:13:21,185
And thanks to Haley,
410
00:13:21,210 --> 00:13:22,575
I'm no longer ashamed
of talking about him.
411
00:13:22,626 --> 00:13:24,050
Ooh! Who is it?
412
00:13:24,075 --> 00:13:25,111
- No one.
- What's his name?
413
00:13:25,136 --> 00:13:26,401
- Nothing.
- But...
414
00:13:26,470 --> 00:13:27,957
Well, if that's it for the feedback...
415
00:13:27,982 --> 00:13:29,682
- No, actually...
- Oh. Yay.
416
00:13:29,751 --> 00:13:33,152
... for me, the ending
felt a little trite.
417
00:13:33,177 --> 00:13:34,537
There's a lot of good stuff in there,
418
00:13:34,605 --> 00:13:36,772
but the whole "I'm sorry, I'm sorry,
419
00:13:36,797 --> 00:13:38,677
"I love you, I love you"... I just...
420
00:13:38,702 --> 00:13:40,884
I think women are more
complicated than that.
421
00:13:41,013 --> 00:13:42,558
Don't listen to her, Manny.
422
00:13:42,627 --> 00:13:44,032
The ending was beautiful.
423
00:13:44,057 --> 00:13:46,248
It's just that some
women have a hard time
424
00:13:46,273 --> 00:13:48,187
expressing their feelings.
425
00:13:48,212 --> 00:13:49,228
Oh, this again?
426
00:13:49,253 --> 00:13:52,138
- Gloria, I'm a very feeling person.
- Oh, really?
427
00:13:52,163 --> 00:13:55,106
From the woman that
writes in my birthday cards
428
00:13:55,131 --> 00:13:56,631
"Best, Claire."
429
00:13:56,656 --> 00:13:57,732
How is that not warm?
430
00:13:57,757 --> 00:13:59,934
I am wishing you quite
literally the best.
431
00:14:00,003 --> 00:14:01,535
I am a person in your family.
432
00:14:01,560 --> 00:14:04,281
I am not the woman
that does your eyebrows.
433
00:14:04,306 --> 00:14:06,693
Why would I send her a birthday card?
434
00:14:06,718 --> 00:14:08,085
The question is...
435
00:14:08,110 --> 00:14:10,929
why can't you write "Love, Claire"?
436
00:14:10,954 --> 00:14:12,622
I write "Love, Gloria."
437
00:14:12,657 --> 00:14:16,053
- [Sighs]
- I even dot the "I" with a huge heart.
438
00:14:16,078 --> 00:14:18,845
I tell you that I love
you, and you say "Me, too."
439
00:14:18,870 --> 00:14:21,152
Why? Why can't you tell
me that you love me?
440
00:14:21,177 --> 00:14:23,109
I don't know why I
can't tell you that I...
441
00:14:23,179 --> 00:14:25,036
There was a time when I wanted to,
442
00:14:25,061 --> 00:14:27,750
and then the moment
passed and time went by
443
00:14:27,775 --> 00:14:29,641
and then it just felt forced.
444
00:14:29,677 --> 00:14:31,349
You... you say it all the time.
445
00:14:31,374 --> 00:14:33,088
One could argue that dilutes it.
446
00:14:33,113 --> 00:14:34,256
Oh, so now it's my fault?
447
00:14:34,281 --> 00:14:35,339
I am lashing out at you
448
00:14:35,364 --> 00:14:37,647
because this is not the first time...
449
00:14:37,672 --> 00:14:39,421
I've been accused of this.
450
00:14:39,446 --> 00:14:42,610
I am sorry I haven't
said it before, Gloria.
451
00:14:42,635 --> 00:14:43,906
I love you.
452
00:14:44,740 --> 00:14:45,965
I love you.
453
00:14:46,033 --> 00:14:47,591
- Mm.
- Okay.
454
00:14:48,170 --> 00:14:49,500
My God, you're right.
455
00:14:49,525 --> 00:14:50,841
It is trite.
456
00:14:52,482 --> 00:14:54,048
- You got this, Sam!
- Come on.
457
00:14:54,423 --> 00:14:55,507
Come on!
458
00:14:55,532 --> 00:14:57,935
You on the other hand... you
throw one more gutter ball,
459
00:14:57,960 --> 00:15:00,612
and I will literally
frame you for murder.
460
00:15:01,157 --> 00:15:02,352
- No pressure.
- [Pins clatter]
461
00:15:02,384 --> 00:15:04,418
[Cheers and applause]
462
00:15:09,977 --> 00:15:10,976
Mwah!
463
00:15:11,542 --> 00:15:13,311
I wonder what that's about.
464
00:15:13,807 --> 00:15:14,877
Oh! Shh, shh, shh!
465
00:15:14,979 --> 00:15:16,783
- [Mockingly] Shh, shh, shh!
- Hmm.
466
00:15:16,947 --> 00:15:18,514
You two seem awfully chummy.
467
00:15:18,539 --> 00:15:19,748
Well, if by "chummy," you mean,
468
00:15:19,783 --> 00:15:22,788
"in the throes of an
electric sexual relationship,"
469
00:15:22,813 --> 00:15:25,665
then, yes, you bet your
bowling balls we're chummy.
470
00:15:25,690 --> 00:15:26,783
[Groans]
471
00:15:28,875 --> 00:15:30,742
Oh, my gosh.
472
00:15:30,810 --> 00:15:32,377
I just put it all together.
473
00:15:32,439 --> 00:15:34,177
- You're both Fizbo.
- [Groans]
474
00:15:34,209 --> 00:15:35,217
When I'm with one of you,
475
00:15:35,249 --> 00:15:37,499
the other's wearing the costume,
creating the perfect alibi.
476
00:15:37,524 --> 00:15:39,021
Light-bulb moment!
477
00:15:39,046 --> 00:15:40,055
This clown thing again.
478
00:15:40,124 --> 00:15:42,547
Look, Tucker, if I
wanted to get back at you
479
00:15:42,572 --> 00:15:44,341
for, oh, I don't know,
say something like
480
00:15:44,366 --> 00:15:46,340
setting me up with your
straight father-in-law,
481
00:15:46,365 --> 00:15:49,165
I certainly wouldn't do it by
stealing your stupid Bozo suit.
482
00:15:49,190 --> 00:15:51,475
- It's Fizbo.
- Way to take the high road, sweetie.
483
00:15:51,620 --> 00:15:53,964
First, I'd hack your e-mails,
484
00:15:54,542 --> 00:15:57,333
then I'd create several
fake social-media accounts,
485
00:15:57,374 --> 00:15:59,807
which I would use to mount the
multi-pronged smear campaign
486
00:15:59,832 --> 00:16:02,232
to drive a wedge between
you and everything you love.
487
00:16:02,554 --> 00:16:03,853
Wow. [Chuckles]
488
00:16:04,103 --> 00:16:06,030
That's maybe a bit of a red flag.
489
00:16:06,055 --> 00:16:08,205
And then I'd get several
credit cards in your name
490
00:16:08,230 --> 00:16:10,497
and then embark on a
massive identity-theft scheme
491
00:16:10,522 --> 00:16:11,955
that would leave you bankrupt
492
00:16:12,007 --> 00:16:13,999
and, with any luck at all,
facing criminal charges.
493
00:16:14,024 --> 00:16:15,342
- That's what I'd do.
- Okay.
494
00:16:15,367 --> 00:16:17,068
She's a bit of a handful, huh?
495
00:16:17,093 --> 00:16:18,593
You know, I was thinking,
maybe we should take a beat
496
00:16:18,618 --> 00:16:19,816
on meeting your parents this weekend.
497
00:16:19,841 --> 00:16:21,153
What do you say? All right.
498
00:16:21,633 --> 00:16:22,655
What?
499
00:16:23,339 --> 00:16:25,006
Bravo!
500
00:16:25,031 --> 00:16:26,483
Bravo.
501
00:16:26,508 --> 00:16:30,342
If you think your little
over-the-top revenge monologue
502
00:16:30,367 --> 00:16:32,896
is gonna throw me off your scent,
503
00:16:33,085 --> 00:16:35,169
then you are sorely mistaken.
504
00:16:35,271 --> 00:16:37,872
Now open your bag.
505
00:16:38,133 --> 00:16:39,814
- What?
- All of you,
506
00:16:39,839 --> 00:16:41,226
open your bags!
507
00:16:41,251 --> 00:16:42,841
You don't have... Cam, you got to stop.
508
00:16:42,866 --> 00:16:43,934
- Open them!
- Hey, hey!
509
00:16:43,959 --> 00:16:45,455
You're paranoid. You are paranoid.
510
00:16:45,480 --> 00:16:47,238
No one is dressing up...
511
00:16:47,588 --> 00:16:48,954
Oh, damn it, I hate
it when you're right.
512
00:16:48,979 --> 00:16:50,634
What... Oh! There he is!
513
00:16:50,659 --> 00:16:52,216
Chase him! Get him!
514
00:16:52,574 --> 00:16:53,688
Stop!
515
00:16:53,713 --> 00:16:54,898
Imposter!
516
00:16:54,923 --> 00:16:55,935
[Grunts]
517
00:16:56,815 --> 00:16:57,916
- Oh.
- Close your door, ma'am!
518
00:16:57,941 --> 00:16:59,966
- We're in pursuit! Thank you!
- Okay, okay, okay.
519
00:17:01,342 --> 00:17:02,617
[Sighs] Okay.
520
00:17:02,738 --> 00:17:04,370
[Breathing heavily]
521
00:17:04,729 --> 00:17:06,363
- We lost him.
- Wait. His mask.
522
00:17:06,388 --> 00:17:07,400
[Sniffs]
523
00:17:07,425 --> 00:17:09,625
- It smells like beer and cheese fires.
- Oh, Mitchell,
524
00:17:09,650 --> 00:17:11,057
- that's good investigative work.
- Yes.
525
00:17:11,082 --> 00:17:13,882
You've narrowed it down to
everyone in the bowling alley.
526
00:17:21,427 --> 00:17:22,581
Uno.
527
00:17:22,606 --> 00:17:24,762
[Laughter]
528
00:17:24,787 --> 00:17:25,790
There you are.
529
00:17:25,816 --> 00:17:27,549
We've been looking all over for you.
530
00:17:27,574 --> 00:17:30,326
Did you check in here, in
the room where the party is?
531
00:17:30,351 --> 00:17:32,812
Don't worry. We didn't forget about you.
532
00:17:32,921 --> 00:17:34,753
- Boop.
- I hope it was worth it.
533
00:17:34,778 --> 00:17:36,628
We missed our reservation
to Captain Scupper's.
534
00:17:36,653 --> 00:17:38,051
Don't worry, Phil. We ate.
535
00:17:38,076 --> 00:17:40,510
Pit boss sent some shrimp
cocktails over to our craps table.
536
00:17:40,535 --> 00:17:42,573
Along with some regular
cocktails, am I right?
537
00:17:42,598 --> 00:17:43,609
Yeah!
538
00:17:43,634 --> 00:17:45,010
[Both laugh]
539
00:17:45,035 --> 00:17:46,635
You... you had to be there.
540
00:17:46,660 --> 00:17:48,058
I get it. You had shrimp and drinks.
541
00:17:48,083 --> 00:17:49,459
Now, if it's not too much trouble,
542
00:17:49,484 --> 00:17:50,700
maybe we could get back on schedule.
543
00:17:50,725 --> 00:17:52,605
We don't want to miss
Sedaka's opening act...
544
00:17:52,630 --> 00:17:53,796
Extremely Little Richard.
545
00:17:53,826 --> 00:17:56,175
- Good golly, is he small!
- [Laughs]
546
00:17:56,200 --> 00:17:58,134
Change of plans...
I traded those tickets
547
00:17:58,159 --> 00:18:00,163
for seats to "Sexcalibur."
548
00:18:00,188 --> 00:18:02,311
- You what?
- It's a dirty "Medieval Times."
549
00:18:02,336 --> 00:18:03,659
Are you kidding me?
550
00:18:03,684 --> 00:18:04,949
It's okay, Phil.
551
00:18:04,974 --> 00:18:07,575
I waited 79 years to see Neil Sedaka.
552
00:18:07,600 --> 00:18:09,391
I can wait another 79.
553
00:18:09,416 --> 00:18:11,345
No, Dad. You're being too nice.
554
00:18:11,370 --> 00:18:14,444
This is your bachelor party, not yours!
555
00:18:14,469 --> 00:18:16,001
You're ruining this whole night.
556
00:18:16,026 --> 00:18:17,803
You ruined it when you planned it.
557
00:18:17,828 --> 00:18:20,079
And get that finger out of my face.
558
00:18:20,104 --> 00:18:22,241
Nobody hijacks my dad's party,
559
00:18:22,266 --> 00:18:24,650
and nobody tells me where...
560
00:18:24,675 --> 00:18:26,025
to put my finger.
561
00:18:26,473 --> 00:18:27,526
Boop!
562
00:18:28,063 --> 00:18:29,129
Here we go.
563
00:18:30,783 --> 00:18:32,586
I wanted a brother when I was 10,
564
00:18:32,611 --> 00:18:33,921
not a 10-year-old brother!
565
00:18:33,946 --> 00:18:35,177
You're the baby!
566
00:18:35,354 --> 00:18:37,419
You're older, but you're the baby.
567
00:18:37,444 --> 00:18:38,780
You're no Marty!
568
00:18:38,805 --> 00:18:40,345
It's not much of a fight,
but maybe we should...
569
00:18:40,370 --> 00:18:42,500
I know. I thought it was gonna get good.
570
00:18:42,525 --> 00:18:44,825
All right, that's enough. Stop.
571
00:18:44,850 --> 00:18:46,083
Phil, you're being ridiculous.
572
00:18:46,108 --> 00:18:49,044
Ray, I don't know you, but
you seem like a horse's ass.
573
00:18:49,069 --> 00:18:51,035
All right, now! Grow up!
574
00:18:51,060 --> 00:18:52,659
Start acting like gentlemen.
575
00:18:52,684 --> 00:18:54,458
Uh, would you two mind
576
00:18:54,483 --> 00:18:56,222
stepping out in the hall for a second?
577
00:18:56,247 --> 00:18:58,810
- I need to have a word with Phil.
- All right, but hurry up.
578
00:18:58,835 --> 00:19:01,336
We don't want to miss the
unlacing of the first wench.
579
00:19:01,602 --> 00:19:03,005
- [Door opens, closes]
- You know, I really appreciate
580
00:19:03,030 --> 00:19:05,754
all you've done arranging
my party, but, you know,
581
00:19:06,159 --> 00:19:08,022
I'm happy doing whatever.
582
00:19:08,047 --> 00:19:09,687
Is something else bothering you?
583
00:19:09,712 --> 00:19:11,024
I don't know.
584
00:19:11,827 --> 00:19:13,129
So much is changing, Dad.
585
00:19:13,154 --> 00:19:15,810
I guess I'm kind of afraid
that this is the end of an era.
586
00:19:15,835 --> 00:19:18,203
Now I have to share you
with Lorraine, with that.
587
00:19:18,228 --> 00:19:19,946
You're not losing me.
588
00:19:19,971 --> 00:19:22,572
As a matter of fact, you're
gonna be seeing a lot more of me.
589
00:19:22,597 --> 00:19:25,683
Lorraine and I have been kind
of kicking around the idea of...
590
00:19:25,755 --> 00:19:27,510
moving to California.
591
00:19:27,728 --> 00:19:29,186
To be closer to me?
592
00:19:29,211 --> 00:19:30,610
Yes.
593
00:19:30,779 --> 00:19:32,976
And to be farther from Ray.
594
00:19:34,499 --> 00:19:35,776
Hey, Louise,
595
00:19:35,801 --> 00:19:37,626
we just saw evil Fizbo again.
596
00:19:37,651 --> 00:19:39,862
It's true. I was there. We
lost him in the parking lot.
597
00:19:39,887 --> 00:19:40,949
Yeah, we looked in every car.
598
00:19:40,974 --> 00:19:42,930
Geez, Louise, there has
to be something you can do.
599
00:19:42,955 --> 00:19:44,687
Fine. First thing tomorrow,
I'll look into it...
600
00:19:44,712 --> 00:19:46,431
- if you can focus on bowling.
- I can.
601
00:19:46,456 --> 00:19:48,228
There you are. I've been
looking all over for you.
602
00:19:48,259 --> 00:19:50,130
- It's your turn.
- Sorry. I was in the ladies room.
603
00:19:50,155 --> 00:19:51,907
I was putting IcyHot on my hammies.
604
00:19:51,932 --> 00:19:52,956
Mm.
605
00:19:53,752 --> 00:19:55,118
Ahh! Ohh.
606
00:19:55,143 --> 00:19:56,542
D-Did you do something to your hand?
607
00:19:56,567 --> 00:19:58,318
I just hurt it playing air hockey.
608
00:19:58,343 --> 00:20:00,142
They got rid of the air
hockey table months ago.
609
00:20:00,167 --> 00:20:01,701
Uh... nothing. I mean, I was...
610
00:20:01,726 --> 00:20:03,493
Wait... w-wait... wait a minute.
611
00:20:03,688 --> 00:20:04,820
You go missing,
612
00:20:04,845 --> 00:20:06,958
then you mysteriously
hurt your hand, and t...
613
00:20:06,983 --> 00:20:09,603
Okay, okay... there is
lipstick in this mask,
614
00:20:09,628 --> 00:20:11,151
and it is... it is the same shade
615
00:20:11,176 --> 00:20:12,871
as the lipstick on your beer.
616
00:20:12,896 --> 00:20:14,796
[Gasps] You're Fizbo?
617
00:20:14,821 --> 00:20:15,853
You wear lipstick?
618
00:20:15,878 --> 00:20:17,599
But you're on our team.
619
00:20:17,624 --> 00:20:18,998
Why would you do this?
620
00:20:19,023 --> 00:20:20,591
Because you bug me.
621
00:20:21,413 --> 00:20:22,519
That's it?
622
00:20:22,544 --> 00:20:24,811
You picked the team name,
you designed the shirts,
623
00:20:24,836 --> 00:20:25,872
you take all the credit.
624
00:20:25,897 --> 00:20:27,264
Everything's about you.
625
00:20:27,289 --> 00:20:30,322
You messed with his head so he'd
lose us the team championship.
626
00:20:30,347 --> 00:20:32,732
Yeah, opening the door
for... for you to be captain.
627
00:20:32,757 --> 00:20:34,160
I should be captain.
628
00:20:34,185 --> 00:20:37,251
Give me my Fizbo.
629
00:20:38,935 --> 00:20:40,434
[Pins clatter]
630
00:20:41,150 --> 00:20:42,194
You get out of my face.
631
00:20:42,219 --> 00:20:43,378
Wait, wait, no. Hold on. Hold on.
632
00:20:43,403 --> 00:20:45,052
Is there still a chance
that we could win this?
633
00:20:45,077 --> 00:20:47,656
Not unless we can pick
up 57 pins in one frame.
634
00:20:47,681 --> 00:20:49,928
Yeah. And you get out of his face.
635
00:20:54,955 --> 00:20:57,403
Hello, fruit of your father's loins.
636
00:20:57,428 --> 00:20:58,622
"Mitchell's" fine.
637
00:20:58,647 --> 00:21:00,027
You know, speaking of Jay...
638
00:21:00,052 --> 00:21:01,055
You brought him up.
639
00:21:01,080 --> 00:21:03,908
Well, your father and I had a moment...
640
00:21:03,933 --> 00:21:05,800
- Uh-huh...
- ... a couple of years ago
641
00:21:05,825 --> 00:21:08,403
when he was pretending to be gay
642
00:21:08,428 --> 00:21:10,083
so that he could bowl in our league.
643
00:21:10,091 --> 00:21:11,490
I know he said it was all an act,
644
00:21:11,515 --> 00:21:13,815
but what I felt from him...
645
00:21:13,885 --> 00:21:15,427
It was just so very real.
646
00:21:15,452 --> 00:21:17,035
Okay, Martin, I hate
to break this to you,
647
00:21:17,060 --> 00:21:19,842
but my dad is potentially the
straightest man on the planet.
648
00:21:19,867 --> 00:21:21,013
Yeah, but that not withstanding,
649
00:21:21,038 --> 00:21:23,074
do you think maybe you could
give me his phone number?
650
00:21:23,091 --> 00:21:25,634
It's just always felt like
unfinished business to me.
651
00:21:25,659 --> 00:21:27,370
I am not giving you his phone number.
652
00:21:27,395 --> 00:21:29,962
- I'll give you my trophy.
- It's 3-1-0...
653
00:21:30,055 --> 00:21:34,164
Synced and corrected by Aaronnmb
www.addic7ed.com