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♪ It seems today that all you see ♪
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♪ Is violence in movies and sex on TV ♪
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♪ But where are those good
old-fashioned values ♪
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♪ On which we used to rely? ♪
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♪ Lucky there's a family guy ♪
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♪ Lucky there's a man
who positively can do ♪
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♪ All the things that make us ♪
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♪ Laugh and cry ♪
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♪ He's... a... Fam... ily... Guy! ♪
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Sync and corrections by btsix
www.addic7ed.com
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We now return to Sesame
Street, now on HBO.
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Oh, hi, you guys. How was school?
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Honestly, Mom, today was kind of weird.
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Every kid in school had to write a list
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of five reasons Principal
Shepherd is cool
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and then have their parents sign it.
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What? That seems crazy.
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One time, I saw him pee in a urinal
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with his hands on his hips.
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That's pretty boss.
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Why would the principal make
all the students do that?
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I don't know.
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I think he's going through a tough time.
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He's in the middle of a bad divorce.
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What? How do you know that?
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He's actually been pretty open about it.
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Good morning, students.
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Today at 3:30,
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James Woods High will be
hosting a cross-country meet,
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which also happens to be where Lorraine
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has threatened to take my
children, across the country.
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And here's today's
"Tuesday Trivia" question:
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Does this sound like yelling?
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Because, apparently, this sounds
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to some people like yelling.
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All right, finally some peace and quiet,
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so I can buckle down and
get some writing done.
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- Hey, Bonnie!
- What?
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Listen to this. Say, "It's
all been a pack of lies."
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What? Why?
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Just do it! Just say, "It's
all been a pack of lies."
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"It's all been a pack of lies."
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That sounded really good.
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Thanks, babe. Hey, you know
what that song's about?
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Phil Collins watching some
guy watch another guy drown.
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And then, the next night,
he invited the watching guy
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to be in the front row of his concert
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so he could sing it right to him
and they could arrest the guy!
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Really? Why wouldn't he have just
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helped the guy who was drowning?
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I don't know, I think he was
on a bridge or something.
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Like, he could see it, but he
couldn't get there in time.
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But he let a whole day pass?
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Why didn't he call the cops?
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'Cause he was busy writing the song!
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Wait, if he just watched,
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doesn't that also make
him a little guilty?
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Look, I'm not saying we
wouldn't bring Phil Collins
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in for questioning.
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I feel like maybe this story is bogus.
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Hang on, let me check Snopes.
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Yeah, none of that happened.
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Hey. What's up?
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Well, I'm trying to work on a sequel
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to The Old Man and the Sea.
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Are you, are you allowed to do that?
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But I can't get anything done.
It's so damn loud around here.
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Oh, yeah, that's what Hemingway
used to complain about.
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"This Spanish Civil
War is just too loud.
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How am I supposed to get anything done?"
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No, I mean, it might sound silly,
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but I used to daydream that by now
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I'd have my own place
by a lake somewhere,
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an oasis where I could go to write.
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Pay the bills by renting out the rooms.
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Oh, like a B and B? That could be fun.
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What? What are you talking about?
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I'm talking about you and
me opening a B and B.
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Are you serious? That'd be great!
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Sure. It'll be fun.
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All right, let's give it a try.
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Can't be any worse than when
I was on the Night's Watch.
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Hey, guys, you all want
to say the oath again?
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For the watch.
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For the watch.
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For the watch.
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Hi, Brian.
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I'm the boring storyline
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of the fat guy that's
watching that girl.
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And I'm Ballers.
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Ow!
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I totally get it. You're
right to do this.
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Well, well, if it isn't Meg Griffin.
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Leave me alone, you guys.
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Relax. We're taking the
day off from bullying.
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Oh, thank God.
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Very funny. Who put the Ark
of the Covenant in here?
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Meg is so stupid.
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She couldn't handle the
glory of God's love.
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Students, faculty and staff
of James Woods High,
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does anyone know how to push down
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the backseat of a Highlander?
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I know I can make a bed in
there, I just don't know how.
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Oh, my God, Principal
Shepherd, what's wrong?
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I just listened to two
hours of butt-dialed sex
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between my wife and the ADT alarm guy.
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Why didn't you just hang up?
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Because I miss the sound of her voice.
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Oh, my God!
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P.A.): Principal Shepherd,
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your wife is on the line.
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She says, "Uh, uh, oh, God, harder."
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Man, I still can't get over
how perfect this place is.
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I know, it's going to be
such a darling B and B.
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I got the boiler up and
running, Mr. Griffin.
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Well, we don't have a boiler,
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but I can't wait to see what
you've done in the cellar.
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Oh, also, please rub the "H"
and the "C" off all the knobs,
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so people won't know what
the hell's going on.
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I want the first four
minutes of every shower
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to be confusion and anger.
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Welcome, members of
our school community.
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Let's call to order
this emergency meeting
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of the school board regarding
Principal Shepherd's meltdown.
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I know a number of our
students have felt
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"traumatized" by the
events of this week,
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and we take those
concerns very seriously.
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Lois, I'm done with my gum.
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I don't want it.
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But I'm done with it.
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Peter, shh.
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I'll take it.
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So, due to his erratic
behavior, we have placed
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Principal Shepherd on
indefinite paid leave.
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Typically, Vice Principal
McGuire would step in.
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However, I was informed earlier today
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that she was found dead in her car.
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Therefore, the board is
seeking a parent volunteer
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to serve as interim principal
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until a permanent
replacement can be found.
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Hey, Lois, maybe I should do
it. I've always wanted a job
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where I can let my dandruff go wild.
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What? No way.
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I'm not having my dad be the principal.
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How embarrassing!
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Yeah, no offense,
Peter, but I don't know
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if you should be running a school.
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What are you talking about?
I'm a natural leader.
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That's why I'm so good
at leading Simon Says.
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Simon says, "Leave the band."
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Yeah, I don't know.
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Well, you know what? You guys are wrong.
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And I'm gonna prove it to you.
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Again, any volunteers?
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I'll be your new principal!
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Wonderful. Why don't you come
on up and introduce yourself.
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All right. James Woods High
cheerleaders, give me a hand!
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Check. Him out.
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Check. Check him out.
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- My name is Peter.
- Check.
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- That ain't no lie.
- Check.
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I go pop, pop, fizz, fizz,
oh, how sweet it is.
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Check! Check!
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I'm done with this gum now.
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I don't want it.
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But I'm done with it.
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Mom, why was this
Listerine in the garbage?
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Oh, your father says he
doesn't need it anymore
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now that he's a high school principal.
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Oh, my God, he's not
really doing that, is he?
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I'm only gonna get bullied worse now.
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Hello, Breakfast Club.
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As a principal, I like
to start each morning
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with a reference from last century.
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Dad, I don't want you to do this.
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Too late. I've already been practicing
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giving students awkward and
uncoordinated high fives.
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Chris, if I may?
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Yay! Two fingers and
side-of-the-palm contact.
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Perfect!
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All right, I got to get to work by 7:40,
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'cause that's when high school
starts for some reason.
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See you at the
way-too-early 10:40 lunch.
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I feel you, Meg.
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- Shut up.
- You shut up!
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Wow, look at us. Running a B and B.
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Yes, so far, all the
guests seem very happy.
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Hi, we're checking out.
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Just charge my card.
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That's weird, that's the fifth couple
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to check out after only an hour.
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Hi, we'd like a room, please.
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Wait, I'm sorry, weren't
you just here a moment ago
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with a different man... oh, crap.
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Stewie, we have a problem.
The only people checking in
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are here to have sex with prostitutes.
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What? Nonsense.
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Well, then why are they all
signing the guest book
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and writing quaint things like,
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"Railed Crystal good." Oh...
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Damn it, this is awful.
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How could I have not noticed sooner?
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00:08:35,549 --> 00:08:36,582
I mean, it's more obvious
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than when George Takei
was in the closet.
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Hey, George, how are you?
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I am a heterosexual.
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00:08:43,123 --> 00:08:45,058
I love vaginas.
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So, what are you doing tonight?
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Hopefully, choking on
some lovely lady parts.
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Oh, nummers.
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All right, that sounds
fun. See you later.
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00:08:54,635 --> 00:08:57,588
I am a heterosexual.
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00:09:01,691 --> 00:09:02,842
Good morning, children.
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00:09:02,843 --> 00:09:05,645
I am your interim
principal, Mr. Griffin.
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00:09:05,646 --> 00:09:07,646
And to show I'm a fun principal,
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00:09:07,647 --> 00:09:09,481
I'm gonna do the Ice Bucket Challenge.
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Three years too late,
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but right on time for a principal.
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00:09:12,453 --> 00:09:15,473
And making no less sense than
it did when it was current.
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You're welcome, person who's
probably already dead.
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But, hey, now I got
something even more fun.
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How about we all do an
expertly choreographed lip-dub
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00:09:27,167 --> 00:09:28,800
to a popular song.
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♪ Ah... ♪
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00:09:37,343 --> 00:09:39,145
♪ This hit, that ice cold ♪
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00:09:39,146 --> 00:09:41,481
♪ Michelle Pfeiffer, that white gold ♪
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00:09:41,482 --> 00:09:43,315
♪ This one for them hood girls ♪
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00:09:43,316 --> 00:09:45,484
♪ Them good girls,
straight masterpieces ♪
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00:09:45,485 --> 00:09:49,521
♪ Stylin', wilin', livin'
it up in the city... ♪
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♪ Got to kiss myself, I'm so pretty ♪
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♪ I'm too hot ♪
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♪ Hot damn ♪
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♪ Call the police and the fireman... ♪
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Ladies, this is my associate.
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Brian, bitches. Bitches, Brian.
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00:10:06,072 --> 00:10:07,506
What... what's all this?
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00:10:07,507 --> 00:10:10,309
This, Brian, is called diversification.
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00:10:10,310 --> 00:10:12,212
You see, if our guests insist on
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00:10:12,213 --> 00:10:14,146
bringing prostitutes into our B and B,
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00:10:14,147 --> 00:10:16,181
we might as well provide the women, too.
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00:10:16,182 --> 00:10:18,384
What? Stewie, we're not
gonna become pimps.
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Are you sure?
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00:10:19,652 --> 00:10:21,386
I'm sure. The answer is no,
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00:10:21,387 --> 00:10:22,921
so don't bother flashing a wad of money,
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00:10:22,922 --> 00:10:24,723
because there's no way I'm
gonna change my answer
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00:10:24,724 --> 00:10:26,092
in the middle of this sentence...
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00:10:26,093 --> 00:10:28,060
Okay, maybe we could try it
out and see how it goes.
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00:10:28,061 --> 00:10:29,595
Hey, what are you girls
doing standing around?!
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00:10:29,596 --> 00:10:30,563
Get to work!
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00:10:30,564 --> 00:10:33,098
Ha-ha! I'm telling you,
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00:10:33,099 --> 00:10:35,901
that dog is very easily persuaded.
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00:10:35,902 --> 00:10:38,938
Now let's see what's going
on at the old high school.
253
00:10:38,939 --> 00:10:40,740
Ooh...
254
00:10:40,741 --> 00:10:42,942
Doo-ooh...
255
00:10:42,943 --> 00:10:44,028
Doo...
256
00:10:48,297 --> 00:10:49,915
Hey, guys, guys.
257
00:10:49,916 --> 00:10:51,617
When Borat was making announcements
258
00:10:51,618 --> 00:10:54,520
over the P.A. this morning, that was me.
259
00:10:54,521 --> 00:10:56,722
What?! Shut the front door.
260
00:10:56,723 --> 00:10:59,592
Taco Tuesday is nice.
261
00:10:59,593 --> 00:11:01,727
Knock it off! Give me back my lunch.
262
00:11:01,728 --> 00:11:03,129
What do we got here?
263
00:11:03,130 --> 00:11:05,464
Grape juice in a Ziploc bag?
264
00:11:05,465 --> 00:11:07,383
I have to make my own Capri Suns.
265
00:11:09,653 --> 00:11:11,103
Hey, stupid, what the
hell are you doing?
266
00:11:11,104 --> 00:11:12,204
That's my daughter!
267
00:11:12,205 --> 00:11:14,606
Yeah? What are you gonna do about it?
268
00:11:14,607 --> 00:11:15,974
What am I gonna do about it?
269
00:11:15,975 --> 00:11:17,376
I'll knock your teeth down your throat
270
00:11:17,377 --> 00:11:19,077
and out your butt, you little bastard!
271
00:11:19,078 --> 00:11:20,579
Oh, you think that's funny,
272
00:11:20,580 --> 00:11:22,414
him spilling juice all over the floor?
273
00:11:22,415 --> 00:11:23,949
This is gonna make
people's sneakers sticky,
274
00:11:23,950 --> 00:11:25,450
and then we're gonna
have to listen to...
275
00:11:26,619 --> 00:11:27,786
all day!
276
00:11:27,787 --> 00:11:28,887
Well, I won't have it.
277
00:11:28,888 --> 00:11:30,222
Get on your knees and lick that up!
278
00:11:30,223 --> 00:11:32,558
What? A-Are you serious?
279
00:11:32,559 --> 00:11:34,345
Yeah, I'm serious. I'm the principal!
280
00:11:41,451 --> 00:11:43,602
Oh, my God, I'm so embarrassed.
281
00:11:43,603 --> 00:11:45,004
What are you talking about?
282
00:11:45,005 --> 00:11:47,339
That jerk is finally
getting what he deserves.
283
00:11:47,340 --> 00:11:49,308
Yeah, Meg, now that your
dad's the principal,
284
00:11:49,309 --> 00:11:51,644
you could finally have
power over the bullies.
285
00:11:51,645 --> 00:11:53,445
Now, you little punks get to class.
286
00:11:53,446 --> 00:11:55,347
And if you see Miss
Millikan, tell her I said,
287
00:11:55,348 --> 00:11:57,116
"Hey, what's up?"
288
00:11:57,117 --> 00:11:58,818
Huh.
289
00:11:58,819 --> 00:12:00,285
Maybe you're right.
290
00:12:00,286 --> 00:12:02,688
Wow, Dad, that was really something.
291
00:12:02,689 --> 00:12:04,089
Miss Millikan's just a friend.
292
00:12:04,090 --> 00:12:05,491
Oh, I don't mean that.
293
00:12:05,492 --> 00:12:06,925
I mean the way you handled those guys
294
00:12:06,926 --> 00:12:08,294
that were picking on me.
295
00:12:08,295 --> 00:12:10,862
Really? I felt like I kind
of lost my cool there.
296
00:12:10,863 --> 00:12:12,164
Not at all.
297
00:12:12,165 --> 00:12:13,966
That's what you've got to do more of.
298
00:12:13,967 --> 00:12:16,601
- You were like a real principal there.
- I was?
299
00:12:16,602 --> 00:12:19,137
Yeah. In fact, if you're
gonna lead this school,
300
00:12:19,138 --> 00:12:21,473
you've got to know that
kids need discipline.
301
00:12:21,474 --> 00:12:23,342
Especially kids like them.
302
00:12:23,343 --> 00:12:24,876
And their friends, Jeremy and Bridget.
303
00:12:24,877 --> 00:12:26,379
Oh, really?
304
00:12:26,380 --> 00:12:29,448
Where might I find this
Jeremy and Bridget?
305
00:12:29,449 --> 00:12:31,483
I don't know, study hall, second floor?
306
00:12:33,987 --> 00:12:36,823
All right, listen up,
maggots! Fun's over!
307
00:12:36,824 --> 00:12:38,857
There's gonna be some
changes around here,
308
00:12:38,858 --> 00:12:40,693
and what better way to
show you I'm serious
309
00:12:40,694 --> 00:12:43,213
than to smash a desk
with a baseball bat?
310
00:12:58,827 --> 00:13:00,496
Oh!
311
00:13:25,422 --> 00:13:27,173
Okay, we'll pick this up on Monday.
312
00:13:27,174 --> 00:13:29,107
Do any of you know my wife Lois?
313
00:13:29,108 --> 00:13:30,909
Tell her I'm on the bats
and to come get me.
314
00:13:30,910 --> 00:13:31,928
She'll know what it means.
315
00:13:37,668 --> 00:13:39,136
Let's go. Keep it moving.
316
00:13:39,137 --> 00:13:40,969
Get to class. Hey, you.
317
00:13:40,970 --> 00:13:43,238
You salute that flag
when you walk by, kid.
318
00:13:43,239 --> 00:13:44,940
Loads of people fought for that thing,
319
00:13:44,941 --> 00:13:46,475
including yours truly.
320
00:13:46,476 --> 00:13:48,310
Y-You were in the service?
321
00:13:48,311 --> 00:13:51,379
I may have misunderstood
what "yours truly" means.
322
00:13:51,380 --> 00:13:52,814
Hey, Dad, listen.
323
00:13:52,815 --> 00:13:54,448
The four of us got together last night,
324
00:13:54,449 --> 00:13:56,985
and we came up with a
list of 11 students
325
00:13:56,986 --> 00:13:59,287
and two teachers that you
need to do something about.
326
00:13:59,288 --> 00:14:00,889
Maybe you should start
with Mark Rutledge.
327
00:14:00,890 --> 00:14:02,290
Why? What'd he do?
328
00:14:02,291 --> 00:14:04,426
He wouldn't kiss Ruth at
the Sadie Hawkins dance,
329
00:14:04,427 --> 00:14:05,727
even though she bought him dinner before
330
00:14:05,728 --> 00:14:07,229
at Walt's Roast Beef.
331
00:14:07,230 --> 00:14:09,064
Well, I don't see how that's
got anything to do...
332
00:14:09,065 --> 00:14:10,264
And he called you fat.
333
00:14:10,265 --> 00:14:11,600
Oh, I'm gonna squish him!
334
00:14:11,601 --> 00:14:12,801
That's right.
335
00:14:12,802 --> 00:14:14,603
Don't take any crap from anyone.
336
00:14:14,604 --> 00:14:15,803
Oh, I won't.
337
00:14:15,804 --> 00:14:17,672
I'm gonna take down all these punks,
338
00:14:17,673 --> 00:14:20,475
just like I did in my
1980s crime series,
339
00:14:20,476 --> 00:14:23,078
Gary Ratowski, Hockey Cop.
340
00:14:23,079 --> 00:14:24,446
Gimme that purse!
341
00:14:24,447 --> 00:14:26,157
Hey, criminals.
342
00:14:27,032 --> 00:14:29,150
Puck you!
343
00:14:32,255 --> 00:14:34,641
Get the puck out of my neighborhood.
344
00:14:36,542 --> 00:14:38,527
Go puck yourself.
345
00:14:39,529 --> 00:14:41,281
Uh-oh, here come the real cops.
346
00:14:43,383 --> 00:14:45,819
Hockey Cop, not a cop.
347
00:14:49,888 --> 00:14:51,706
All right, ladies, I'm going to put this
348
00:14:51,707 --> 00:14:53,341
as gently as I can,
349
00:14:53,342 --> 00:14:55,110
but it appears that someone's rectum
350
00:14:55,111 --> 00:14:56,711
fell out on the stairs.
351
00:14:56,712 --> 00:14:59,380
Now, whose is it? Be honest.
352
00:14:59,381 --> 00:15:00,682
All right, that's fine.
353
00:15:00,683 --> 00:15:02,450
But let's just agree on a rule
354
00:15:02,451 --> 00:15:04,653
that if your rectum falls
out on the stairs,
355
00:15:04,654 --> 00:15:06,054
it's on you to pick it up.
356
00:15:06,055 --> 00:15:07,688
Look at that, Brian.
357
00:15:07,689 --> 00:15:10,457
Our day has just begun, and
there's a line out the door.
358
00:15:10,458 --> 00:15:12,126
I know, we're raking it in.
359
00:15:12,127 --> 00:15:13,495
This is a hell of a lot easier
360
00:15:13,496 --> 00:15:15,129
than when I delivered
pizza in New Orleans.
361
00:15:17,399 --> 00:15:18,633
What the hell?
362
00:15:18,634 --> 00:15:20,969
♪ We're all just blocking the street ♪
363
00:15:20,970 --> 00:15:22,671
♪ We're all just
blocking the street... ♪
364
00:15:22,672 --> 00:15:24,906
Come on, I got to deliver this pizza.
365
00:15:24,907 --> 00:15:26,874
♪ Five trumpets do the job of one ♪
366
00:15:26,875 --> 00:15:28,643
♪ We're all just
blocking the street... ♪
367
00:15:28,644 --> 00:15:30,145
I need to be there in 30 minutes.
368
00:15:30,146 --> 00:15:31,245
It's a company promise!
369
00:15:31,246 --> 00:15:33,380
♪ Half the band isn't in the band ♪
370
00:15:33,381 --> 00:15:35,049
♪ We're all just
blocking the street... ♪
371
00:15:35,050 --> 00:15:36,384
Oh, thank God.
372
00:15:36,385 --> 00:15:38,552
♪ One of us dropped a contact lens ♪
373
00:15:38,553 --> 00:15:40,555
♪ We're going back to
block the street... ♪
374
00:15:40,556 --> 00:15:41,855
Ah, screw it.
375
00:15:41,856 --> 00:15:43,557
♪ We won't stop blocking the street ♪
376
00:15:43,558 --> 00:15:46,546
♪ Never stop blocking the street. ♪
377
00:15:49,415 --> 00:15:52,334
Okay, so I think Lee
Blanding gets detention.
378
00:15:52,335 --> 00:15:54,568
And for Jason O'Neil,
379
00:15:54,569 --> 00:15:56,238
maybe you could pants
him during an assembly.
380
00:15:56,239 --> 00:15:57,872
Yes, good. I like that.
381
00:15:57,873 --> 00:16:00,674
Oh, hi, you two. What
are you working on?
382
00:16:00,675 --> 00:16:02,009
Oh, nothing.
383
00:16:02,010 --> 00:16:04,745
I, um... I'm just helping Dad
384
00:16:04,746 --> 00:16:06,514
with his schedule for tomorrow.
385
00:16:06,515 --> 00:16:09,117
You know, he's really doing a great job.
386
00:16:09,118 --> 00:16:11,620
He's actually made the
school a lot better.
387
00:16:11,621 --> 00:16:14,355
Huh. Well, I got to
admit I was skeptical,
388
00:16:14,356 --> 00:16:16,758
but it sounds like things are
going pretty well down there.
389
00:16:16,759 --> 00:16:18,193
You bet they are.
390
00:16:18,194 --> 00:16:20,074
They'll go even better after The Purge.
391
00:16:20,075 --> 00:16:21,034
The what?
392
00:16:21,035 --> 00:16:23,063
Hey, Meg, how about one of these?
393
00:16:24,467 --> 00:16:25,734
One of them things, yeah?
394
00:16:25,735 --> 00:16:27,402
Peter, what the hell are you doing?
395
00:16:27,403 --> 00:16:30,438
Uh, he's just saying he
wants to use his key
396
00:16:30,439 --> 00:16:33,575
to drive me to school
tomorrow in his car.
397
00:16:33,576 --> 00:16:36,378
Peter, what exactly are you
doing down at that school?
398
00:16:36,379 --> 00:16:37,712
I'll tell you what I'm doing.
399
00:16:37,713 --> 00:16:39,480
I'm doing a great job,
400
00:16:39,481 --> 00:16:41,249
like when I was a pro football kicker.
401
00:16:44,320 --> 00:16:47,422
Yay! Now I can fist
bump with black guys.
402
00:16:47,423 --> 00:16:48,423
Nailed it, Peter!
403
00:16:48,424 --> 00:16:49,491
There you go!
404
00:16:49,492 --> 00:16:50,925
Yeah! We going to the club tonight?
405
00:16:50,926 --> 00:16:52,913
- Not you!
- Okay!
406
00:16:57,375 --> 00:16:59,401
Hey, Brian, what's a "splat job"?
407
00:16:59,402 --> 00:17:00,802
I-I don't, I don't know, Stewie.
408
00:17:00,803 --> 00:17:02,856
I'm worried that you're seeing too much.
409
00:17:04,323 --> 00:17:05,674
Good morning, ladies.
410
00:17:05,675 --> 00:17:08,076
Were the paramedics able
to resuscitate Lamar Odom?
411
00:17:08,077 --> 00:17:09,677
They're still working on it.
412
00:17:17,837 --> 00:17:19,321
He's tall, get it?
413
00:17:19,322 --> 00:17:21,323
Okay, show's over.
Everybody back to work.
414
00:17:21,324 --> 00:17:23,491
Yeah, about that. We got to talk.
415
00:17:23,492 --> 00:17:25,260
Oh, uh, sure. What's up?
416
00:17:25,261 --> 00:17:29,130
We just realized we can keep all
the money, take your house,
417
00:17:29,131 --> 00:17:31,833
and kill you if you try
to do anything about it.
418
00:17:31,834 --> 00:17:34,135
All right, we're just gonna step outside
419
00:17:34,136 --> 00:17:35,355
and figure out a counter.
420
00:17:38,474 --> 00:17:40,141
And they locked us out.
421
00:17:40,142 --> 00:17:42,277
What about my loaf of
cinnamon raisin bread?!
422
00:17:42,278 --> 00:17:44,697
It's mine! It's not for the whole house!
423
00:17:53,805 --> 00:17:56,024
Let's just go. They won.
424
00:17:56,025 --> 00:17:58,078
Oh, we'll see about that.
425
00:17:59,311 --> 00:18:01,529
Hello, I'd like to report a brothel
426
00:18:01,530 --> 00:18:03,815
operating on Route 6,
near Round Hill Road.
427
00:18:03,816 --> 00:18:04,818
Thank you.
428
00:18:04,819 --> 00:18:07,229
You want to eat mangled raisin bread
429
00:18:07,230 --> 00:18:09,671
across the street and watch
the cops raid the place?
430
00:18:09,672 --> 00:18:12,340
Yeah, I'd like that.
431
00:18:24,270 --> 00:18:26,322
Oh, here comes the UPS guy.
432
00:18:26,323 --> 00:18:29,391
Oh, I bet he's delivering those
marmalade jars we ordered.
433
00:18:29,392 --> 00:18:31,559
Doesn't that feel like
a million years ago?
434
00:18:31,560 --> 00:18:33,161
Yeah, we don't need those anymore.
435
00:18:33,162 --> 00:18:35,014
Sorry, just send them back.
436
00:18:37,750 --> 00:18:39,235
You can just do that?
437
00:18:39,236 --> 00:18:41,318
Oh, yeah, you can just refuse delivery.
438
00:18:41,319 --> 00:18:42,554
You've never done that?
439
00:18:42,555 --> 00:18:44,997
I-I genuinely did not
know you could do that.
440
00:18:44,998 --> 00:18:46,550
Well, you can. Anything you order.
441
00:18:46,551 --> 00:18:48,885
If you don't sign for
it, it has to go back.
442
00:18:48,886 --> 00:18:50,021
Everyone does it.
443
00:18:50,022 --> 00:18:51,655
Most of what America is now
444
00:18:51,656 --> 00:18:54,291
is just boxes going back and forth.
445
00:18:59,964 --> 00:19:03,133
Students, this is a
chair without a seat.
446
00:19:03,134 --> 00:19:06,069
Jeff Banfield, I'd like you
to please come down here,
447
00:19:06,070 --> 00:19:07,637
take your pants off and sit.
448
00:19:07,638 --> 00:19:09,506
Me? What did I do?
449
00:19:09,507 --> 00:19:11,242
You know what you did, Jeff!
450
00:19:11,243 --> 00:19:12,976
I don't even know what's going on!
451
00:19:12,977 --> 00:19:14,477
Just go, Jeff, or he'll start
452
00:19:14,478 --> 00:19:16,246
hitting that trash can
with a spoon again.
453
00:19:16,247 --> 00:19:18,566
That means now, Mr. Banfield!
454
00:19:25,769 --> 00:19:27,570
What is going on here?
455
00:19:27,571 --> 00:19:29,274
Just a little of the three "R" s...
456
00:19:29,275 --> 00:19:32,146
Reading, writing and
wrecking this guy's sack.
457
00:19:32,524 --> 00:19:35,444
The school board received
a very serious complaint.
458
00:19:35,445 --> 00:19:38,923
Mr. Griffin, you are hereby
relieved of your duties.
459
00:19:38,924 --> 00:19:40,810
A promotion?
460
00:19:40,811 --> 00:19:42,464
No, you're fired.
461
00:19:42,465 --> 00:19:44,392
We've reinstated Principal Shepherd.
462
00:19:44,393 --> 00:19:46,059
Wait, he's back?
463
00:19:46,060 --> 00:19:48,563
But he had that crazy
meltdown about his divorce.
464
00:19:48,564 --> 00:19:51,165
Yes, but then I went on
a sex trip to Thailand,
465
00:19:51,166 --> 00:19:53,601
and I banged all the
goofy right out of me.
466
00:19:53,602 --> 00:19:55,336
Wait. Dad's fired?
467
00:19:55,337 --> 00:19:57,055
Who did this? Who turned him in?
468
00:19:57,571 --> 00:19:58,968
I did.
469
00:19:58,969 --> 00:20:00,240
Hi, Mrs. Griffin!
470
00:20:00,241 --> 00:20:02,093
Hi. Hi, Patty.
471
00:20:03,144 --> 00:20:04,345
Why, Mom?
472
00:20:04,346 --> 00:20:07,315
Because what you and your father
have been doing is wrong.
473
00:20:07,316 --> 00:20:09,201
We'll talk about this at home.
474
00:20:10,803 --> 00:20:13,621
Well, I guess your mom
was right all along.
475
00:20:13,622 --> 00:20:16,257
I had no business running a school.
476
00:20:16,258 --> 00:20:18,526
Can I be honest with you, Dad?
477
00:20:18,527 --> 00:20:20,495
I thought you were awesome.
478
00:20:20,496 --> 00:20:22,930
You stood up for all the
kids who get picked on.
479
00:20:22,931 --> 00:20:24,799
You stood up for me.
480
00:20:24,800 --> 00:20:28,468
Wow, so... so you think I did
a good job being principal?
481
00:20:28,469 --> 00:20:31,791
No, you did a good job being my dad.
482
00:20:37,062 --> 00:20:39,146
Come on, Meg, let's go home.
483
00:20:39,147 --> 00:20:41,315
And next time I want to
get back at your bullies,
484
00:20:41,316 --> 00:20:42,950
I'll do it the old-fashioned way...
485
00:20:42,951 --> 00:20:46,406
As a grown man beating up
teenagers in a parking lot.
486
00:20:49,341 --> 00:20:52,660
I'm planning on dying tonight.
487
00:20:52,661 --> 00:20:54,813
What are your plans?
488
00:20:55,683 --> 00:20:57,684
Sync and corrections by btsix
www.addic7ed.com