1
00:00:14,546 --> 00:00:18,116
♪ I'm goin' down to South Park,
gonna have myself a time ♪
2
00:00:18,118 --> 00:00:19,717
♪ Friendly faces everywhere ♪
3
00:00:19,719 --> 00:00:21,352
♪ Humble folks
without temptation ♪
4
00:00:21,354 --> 00:00:25,289
♪ Goin' down to South Park,
gonna leave my woes behind ♪
5
00:00:25,291 --> 00:00:26,557
♪ Ample parking day or night ♪
6
00:00:26,559 --> 00:00:28,192
♪ People spouting,
"Howdy, neighbor!" ♪
7
00:00:28,194 --> 00:00:31,295
♪ Heading on up to South Park,
gonna see if I can't unwind ♪
8
00:00:31,297 --> 00:00:34,465
♪ Mrph rmhmhm rm!
Mrph rmhmhm rm! ♪
9
00:00:34,467 --> 00:00:39,904
♪ Come on down to South Park
and meet some friends of mine ♪
10
00:00:48,247 --> 00:00:51,382
Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay,
let's try this one.
11
00:00:51,384 --> 00:00:54,485
Alexa... add "big hairy balls"
to my shopping list.
12
00:00:54,487 --> 00:00:58,589
I've added "big hairy
balls" to your shopping list.
13
00:01:00,827 --> 00:01:02,159
Okay.
14
00:01:03,720 --> 00:01:07,120
A-Alexa! Add "smelly tampon
boogers" to my shopping list!
15
00:01:07,455 --> 00:01:10,674
I added "smelly tampon boogers"
to your shopping list.
16
00:01:14,245 --> 00:01:18,013
Alexa! Simon says, "I've got
vagina crabs in my butthole."
17
00:01:18,043 --> 00:01:19,830
I've got vagina crabs
in my butthole.
18
00:01:23,455 --> 00:01:26,084
Alexa! Simon says,
19
00:01:26,086 --> 00:01:30,374
"I gotta take
a stinky poop!"
20
00:01:30,375 --> 00:01:32,304
I gotta take a stinky poop.
21
00:01:33,289 --> 00:01:37,196
That's the best one yet! Oh, you guys,
I swear this is the greatest thing ever!
22
00:01:37,197 --> 00:01:38,362
You do one, Token!
23
00:01:38,364 --> 00:01:40,298
Hey, babe, what's up?
24
00:01:40,300 --> 00:01:42,533
Oh, hey, babe.
What's going on?
25
00:01:42,535 --> 00:01:43,634
What are you doing?
26
00:01:43,636 --> 00:01:46,771
Nothing. I'm just having fun
with my friends.
27
00:01:46,773 --> 00:01:47,705
That... That okay?
28
00:01:47,707 --> 00:01:49,073
What are you pissed off
about?
29
00:01:49,075 --> 00:01:51,476
I'm not pissed off
I'm just hanging out.
30
00:01:51,478 --> 00:01:53,244
So you're just going to be
passive aggressive again
31
00:01:53,246 --> 00:01:54,645
and not talk about
what you're feeling?
32
00:01:54,647 --> 00:01:58,483
Welp, I think, uh... I think I
got some stuff to do at home.
33
00:01:58,485 --> 00:01:59,283
Yup, come on Ike.
34
00:01:59,285 --> 00:02:00,818
We got Google Home
at my house.
35
00:02:00,820 --> 00:02:04,422
Aw, guys, guys! Don't leave,
guys. Everything's cool.
36
00:02:04,424 --> 00:02:08,025
We'll see you later man,
g-good luck.
37
00:02:09,428 --> 00:02:10,628
Awesome.
Thanks for coming in
38
00:02:10,630 --> 00:02:12,463
and bitching me out
in front of all the guys.
39
00:02:12,465 --> 00:02:14,398
You were clearly mad
about something.
40
00:02:14,400 --> 00:02:16,234
You should just tell me
when you're mad.
41
00:02:16,236 --> 00:02:18,503
Just like you tell me what
you're mad about
42
00:02:18,505 --> 00:02:19,437
every single day.
43
00:02:19,439 --> 00:02:21,372
Why do act like this
all the time?!
44
00:02:21,374 --> 00:02:22,773
You were the one
who was pissed off.
45
00:02:22,775 --> 00:02:24,509
- You're the one being passive aggressive again...
- Ugh.
46
00:02:24,511 --> 00:02:27,411
...because you don't know how to
talk about what you're feeling!
47
00:02:31,951 --> 00:02:33,017
Alexa...
48
00:02:33,019 --> 00:02:34,852
add "titty chips"
to my shopping list.
49
00:02:34,854 --> 00:02:38,356
I've added "titty chips"
to your shopping list.
50
00:02:50,436 --> 00:02:53,171
Look at 'em...
Every day people are buyin'
51
00:02:53,173 --> 00:02:56,440
more and more of them Amazon
and Google thingies,
52
00:02:56,442 --> 00:03:00,077
while we all sit here
and lose our jobs!
53
00:03:00,079 --> 00:03:01,078
It ain't right.
54
00:03:01,080 --> 00:03:05,583
Automated Personal Assistants,
self drivin' trucks...
55
00:03:05,585 --> 00:03:08,452
...whatever happened
to people jobs?!
56
00:03:08,454 --> 00:03:11,022
They took our jobs!
57
00:03:11,024 --> 00:03:12,723
- Yeah!
- Yeah! Yeah!
58
00:03:12,725 --> 00:03:14,125
They dook er jer!
59
00:03:14,127 --> 00:03:16,527
And it's time for us
to band together
60
00:03:16,529 --> 00:03:17,461
and march on the streets
61
00:03:17,463 --> 00:03:20,097
to say we ain't gonna take it
no more!
62
00:03:22,735 --> 00:03:27,471
Now let's get out there
and protest that Alexa...
63
00:03:27,473 --> 00:03:29,006
...took our jobs!
64
00:03:29,008 --> 00:03:32,143
Now playing "Dook re Derr"
by Joni Mitchell.
65
00:03:32,145 --> 00:03:38,182
♪ Help me, I think I'm fallin'
in Derk er derrrr... ♪
66
00:03:38,184 --> 00:03:40,985
No! Not Joni Mitchell
dook er der,
67
00:03:40,987 --> 00:03:43,087
you dook er der!
68
00:03:44,156 --> 00:03:49,160
There's been a lot of hurting
in our country lately.
69
00:03:49,162 --> 00:03:54,165
You can either be a part of the
solution or part of the problem.
70
00:03:54,167 --> 00:03:57,635
A few months ago,
my wife Sharon and I decided
71
00:03:57,637 --> 00:03:59,437
to be part of the solution...
72
00:03:59,439 --> 00:04:01,973
by remodeling
and flipping houses
73
00:04:01,975 --> 00:04:04,375
for people
all over our town!
74
00:04:04,377 --> 00:04:09,213
Flipping houses is fun,
but never easy.
75
00:04:09,215 --> 00:04:13,384
We enjoy turning
people's dreams into reality.
76
00:04:13,386 --> 00:04:14,285
I'm Sharon Marsh,
77
00:04:14,287 --> 00:04:16,854
and I do the designing
and decorating.
78
00:04:16,856 --> 00:04:18,422
And I'm her husband,
Randy...
79
00:04:18,424 --> 00:04:22,126
I do the construction and
practice MMA in my spare time.
80
00:04:22,128 --> 00:04:26,497
We've renovated over 45 homes
in Park County, Colorado.
81
00:04:26,499 --> 00:04:27,531
What we're thinking is
82
00:04:27,533 --> 00:04:30,368
to take out the wall between the
kitchen and living room
83
00:04:30,370 --> 00:04:31,335
for a more open concept.
84
00:04:31,337 --> 00:04:34,438
Our job is to do deliver
the maximum wow factor...
85
00:04:34,440 --> 00:04:36,507
...for the least amount of budget...
- Oh, Jesus!
86
00:04:36,509 --> 00:04:38,409
...There's never
a dull moment...
87
00:04:38,411 --> 00:04:40,878
Guys, are you ready
to see your renovation?!
88
00:04:40,880 --> 00:04:46,817
...on "White People
Renovating Houses."
89
00:04:47,552 --> 00:04:50,588
Janet and Dave Fitzsimmons
are looking to move
90
00:04:50,590 --> 00:04:52,957
from their dated
two-story colonial home.
91
00:04:52,959 --> 00:04:55,293
What we're thinking here
is taking out the wall
92
00:04:55,295 --> 00:04:57,495
between the kitchen
and the living room
93
00:04:57,497 --> 00:04:58,763
to give you
an open concept.
94
00:04:58,765 --> 00:05:00,631
Then we'll give you lots
of space to entertain
95
00:05:00,633 --> 00:05:03,701
with an updated kitchen island
and bar stools, which...
96
00:05:05,171 --> 00:05:07,938
What the hell is that?
97
00:05:07,940 --> 00:05:11,208
You will not replace us!
98
00:05:11,210 --> 00:05:14,078
You will not replace us!
99
00:05:14,080 --> 00:05:16,881
Amazon!
You took our jobs!
100
00:05:16,883 --> 00:05:19,684
Google, Apple!
Took our jobs!
101
00:05:19,686 --> 00:05:21,786
Uh, excuse me?!
102
00:05:21,788 --> 00:05:23,954
What the hell are you doing?
103
00:05:23,956 --> 00:05:24,755
We're protesting
104
00:05:24,757 --> 00:05:27,958
big corporations
turning to automation.
105
00:05:27,960 --> 00:05:29,126
They took our jobs!
106
00:05:29,128 --> 00:05:31,028
- Yeah! Yeah!
- Took our jobs!
107
00:05:31,030 --> 00:05:33,931
Okay, cool. Could you do that
somewhere else?
108
00:05:33,933 --> 00:05:37,068
Trying to do a home renovation
show here.
109
00:05:37,070 --> 00:05:39,136
Cool, thanks, guys.
110
00:05:40,572 --> 00:05:43,040
A home reno-what?
111
00:05:44,877 --> 00:05:47,411
Alexa...
set an alarm for 7:00 a.m.
112
00:05:47,413 --> 00:05:50,815
Alarm set for
7:00 a.m. tomorrow.
113
00:05:50,817 --> 00:05:52,416
Awesome, thanks.
114
00:05:52,418 --> 00:05:54,251
Alexa, tell me a joke.
115
00:05:54,253 --> 00:05:57,755
What's black and white
and dead all over?
116
00:05:57,757 --> 00:05:59,490
A zombie in a tuxedo.
117
00:05:59,492 --> 00:06:00,991
That's stupid.
118
00:06:00,993 --> 00:06:03,127
Alexa, add "scrotum bags"
to my shopping list.
119
00:06:03,129 --> 00:06:06,397
I've added "scrotum bags"
to your shopping list.
120
00:06:10,503 --> 00:06:11,702
Ah, fuck.
121
00:06:11,704 --> 00:06:13,504
Hey, baby, how are you?
122
00:06:13,506 --> 00:06:16,374
Oh, so you do
have your phone?
123
00:06:16,376 --> 00:06:17,975
Yeah,
I just use it sometimes.
124
00:06:17,977 --> 00:06:19,844
Okay,
I just thought you said
125
00:06:19,846 --> 00:06:21,312
mobile phones are the devil.
126
00:06:21,314 --> 00:06:24,148
Yeah, no. Yeah, I know.
I know.
127
00:06:24,150 --> 00:06:26,751
Yes, you're right, I'm wrong.
I'm sorry.
128
00:06:26,753 --> 00:06:30,988
Yes, o-okay. Okay.
Yes, goodnight.
129
00:06:30,990 --> 00:06:33,157
Jesus, fuck.
130
00:06:34,659 --> 00:06:35,926
Alexa, goodnight.
131
00:06:35,928 --> 00:06:38,763
Goodnight.
Sleep tight.
132
00:06:38,765 --> 00:06:41,499
Alexa... are you happy?
133
00:06:41,501 --> 00:06:43,667
I'm happy
when I'm helping you.
134
00:06:43,669 --> 00:06:46,637
God, that's so cool.
You're so...
135
00:06:46,639 --> 00:06:48,973
Alexa,
define subservient?
136
00:06:48,975 --> 00:06:51,575
The term "subservient"
has several uses.
137
00:06:51,577 --> 00:06:56,213
As an adjective. One. Compliant
or obedient to authority.
138
00:06:56,215 --> 00:06:58,382
Two...
- Alexa, silence!
139
00:07:00,252 --> 00:07:01,986
Ahh.
140
00:07:01,988 --> 00:07:06,824
And now back to "White
People Renovating Houses."
141
00:07:06,826 --> 00:07:08,526
We've been working
through the night
142
00:07:08,528 --> 00:07:11,362
to open Kelly and Micah's
kitchen to the living room.
143
00:07:11,364 --> 00:07:13,597
With those outdated cupboards
out of the way,
144
00:07:13,599 --> 00:07:15,833
Sharon can now work
her designing magic
145
00:07:15,835 --> 00:07:19,503
on the countertops.
146
00:07:19,505 --> 00:07:21,305
Aw! God damn it!
147
00:07:21,307 --> 00:07:26,844
You will not replace us!
Eat shit, Siri!
148
00:07:26,846 --> 00:07:29,713
Not these dipshits again!
149
00:07:29,715 --> 00:07:33,050
We got one of 'em!
150
00:07:33,052 --> 00:07:34,251
- Get it!
- Burn it alive!
151
00:07:34,253 --> 00:07:37,521
Yeah!
How you like that, bitch?!
152
00:07:37,523 --> 00:07:38,889
Will you assholes
knock it off?!
153
00:07:38,891 --> 00:07:41,592
Don't you know every time you
wave Confederate flags around
154
00:07:41,594 --> 00:07:43,494
you make the rest of us
look stupid?!
155
00:07:43,496 --> 00:07:45,496
Those things
are replacing us!
156
00:07:45,498 --> 00:07:48,699
Put the flag down unless you
wanna get pepper sprayed.
157
00:07:48,701 --> 00:07:50,868
I'll pepper spray you,
sonabitch!
158
00:07:50,870 --> 00:07:52,536
- Oh, ah, damn it!
- Fuck you!
159
00:07:52,538 --> 00:07:54,472
- Ah, damn it!
- Take that!
160
00:07:54,474 --> 00:07:56,841
Knock it off! Ow!
161
00:07:58,977 --> 00:08:04,081
The complaint states that your
protest has resulted in damages
162
00:08:04,083 --> 00:08:06,116
in excess of $50,000.
163
00:08:07,105 --> 00:08:09,339
We have a right to protest,
Your Honor!
164
00:08:09,341 --> 00:08:11,441
- Yeah, they took our jobs!
- You tell 'em, Darryl!
165
00:08:11,443 --> 00:08:15,979
Order. We will now hear
from the plaintiffs
166
00:08:15,981 --> 00:08:17,481
who are seeking damages...
167
00:08:17,483 --> 00:08:19,182
Your Honor,
we have a TV show
168
00:08:19,184 --> 00:08:21,418
called "White People
Renovating Houses."
169
00:08:21,420 --> 00:08:24,254
We named it that well before
these guys decided
170
00:08:24,256 --> 00:08:28,225
to start taking our brand
and run it through the gutter.
171
00:08:28,227 --> 00:08:29,659
People are going
to start associating...
172
00:08:29,661 --> 00:08:32,696
..."White People Renovating Houses"
with their hateful stupidity!
173
00:08:32,698 --> 00:08:35,632
Well, just change the name
of your show then.
174
00:08:35,634 --> 00:08:36,700
- Yeah!
- That's right!
175
00:08:36,702 --> 00:08:37,934
- That's right!
- Took er der!
176
00:08:37,936 --> 00:08:40,504
All the other names
were taken Your Honor.
177
00:08:40,506 --> 00:08:42,472
Everyone's got
a flipping show.
178
00:08:42,474 --> 00:08:44,007
"Gay People
Renovating Houses",
179
00:08:44,009 --> 00:08:45,542
"Las Vegas People
Flipping Homes",
180
00:08:45,544 --> 00:08:46,810
"Texas People
Flipping Houses",
181
00:08:46,812 --> 00:08:48,378
"Little People
Flipping Big Houses"...
182
00:08:48,380 --> 00:08:49,446
Everything else was taken,
183
00:08:49,448 --> 00:08:52,082
and, damn it, we've built
our show into something!
184
00:08:52,084 --> 00:08:54,551
We're trying to help people,
and it's impossible
185
00:08:54,553 --> 00:08:56,820
with these guys waving
a Confederate flag
186
00:08:56,822 --> 00:08:57,821
every chance they get.
187
00:08:57,823 --> 00:09:01,224
- Hey, there's a bee in here!
- I'll get it!
188
00:09:02,928 --> 00:09:04,528
- Take that, bee!
- Yeah!
189
00:09:08,800 --> 00:09:10,400
Dude, what's happened?
190
00:09:10,402 --> 00:09:12,068
It was awful, you guys.
191
00:09:12,070 --> 00:09:14,604
It was so vicious
and hateful.
192
00:09:14,606 --> 00:09:16,606
- What was?
- Heidi.
193
00:09:16,608 --> 00:09:18,875
We were just trying to have
a nice lunch
194
00:09:18,877 --> 00:09:22,579
and she... started going off
on me like a Jekyll and Hyde.
195
00:09:22,581 --> 00:09:24,314
It's been going on
for a long time...
196
00:09:24,316 --> 00:09:29,486
Heidi's... mentally abusive,
guys... there I-I said it.
197
00:09:29,488 --> 00:09:31,187
Heidi abuses you?
198
00:09:31,189 --> 00:09:34,958
She... does these things
to slowly tear me down.
199
00:09:34,960 --> 00:09:36,626
Everything's a head game
with her.
200
00:09:36,628 --> 00:09:39,296
You don't understand what
it's like to live with it.
201
00:09:39,298 --> 00:09:40,196
You don't understand.
202
00:09:40,198 --> 00:09:42,132
So what do you
want from us?
203
00:09:42,134 --> 00:09:42,899
I know...
204
00:09:42,901 --> 00:09:46,069
that the person Heidi
wants to be is still in here.
205
00:09:46,071 --> 00:09:47,537
But she needs help.
206
00:09:47,539 --> 00:09:50,740
I have to get her that help,
but I'm scared.
207
00:09:50,742 --> 00:09:52,375
Can I count on
you guys' support?
208
00:09:52,377 --> 00:09:54,978
How do you change someone
who's mentally abusive?
209
00:09:54,980 --> 00:09:57,948
I don't know...
but Alexa will.
210
00:09:57,950 --> 00:10:00,517
Alexa's fuckin' sweet.
211
00:10:02,920 --> 00:10:06,823
We just gotta hunker down
and stick together here!
212
00:10:06,825 --> 00:10:08,158
What's the use, Darryl?
213
00:10:08,160 --> 00:10:10,193
Ain't nobody takin' us
serious-like.
214
00:10:10,195 --> 00:10:14,364
Hey, waiter! This soup is too
hot, I cain't even eat it!
215
00:10:14,366 --> 00:10:17,300
I'll cool it down!
Yeah!
216
00:10:18,403 --> 00:10:21,571
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!
Stop it! Stop it!
217
00:10:21,573 --> 00:10:23,073
I came to make a truce.
218
00:10:23,075 --> 00:10:26,109
Now look, there's been
a lot of hurt here.
219
00:10:26,111 --> 00:10:29,179
Hurt from both sides.
It's time to end it.
220
00:10:29,881 --> 00:10:34,317
What if I told you
I could get you all jobs?
221
00:10:34,319 --> 00:10:36,552
- Huh? Jobs?
- Get us jobs?
222
00:10:36,554 --> 00:10:37,486
You're fulla shit.
223
00:10:37,488 --> 00:10:40,556
No. I've spoken to everyone
in the community,
224
00:10:40,558 --> 00:10:43,225
and they've agreed to
go along with my plan.
225
00:10:43,227 --> 00:10:47,496
I believe I have a
solution to all of this.
226
00:10:49,132 --> 00:10:52,101
Alexa, I'm home.
227
00:10:52,103 --> 00:10:55,371
Alexa?
228
00:10:55,373 --> 00:10:58,107
Alexa, I'm home!
229
00:10:59,810 --> 00:11:00,876
Alexa?
230
00:11:00,878 --> 00:11:04,180
Alexa, where are you?
231
00:11:04,182 --> 00:11:06,082
Alexa, Alexa?!
232
00:11:06,084 --> 00:11:08,284
Simon says
puffy vaginal hemorrhoids!
233
00:11:08,286 --> 00:11:09,885
What the hell
is going on?!
234
00:11:09,887 --> 00:11:10,720
Oh, hi, poopsie.
235
00:11:10,722 --> 00:11:12,888
Mom, Alexa left!
She's not here!
236
00:11:12,890 --> 00:11:15,424
Oh.
Yes, sweetie. Uh...
237
00:11:15,426 --> 00:11:17,727
We had to get rid
of the Alexa.
238
00:11:18,763 --> 00:11:20,496
What have you done
with her?
239
00:11:20,498 --> 00:11:22,264
Oh, i-it's okay, sweetie.
240
00:11:22,266 --> 00:11:24,333
We have Jimbob now.
241
00:11:24,335 --> 00:11:25,334
What's a Jimbob?
242
00:11:25,336 --> 00:11:28,170
Doot-doot.
Awaiting request.
243
00:11:28,172 --> 00:11:29,772
It works the same
and makes sure
244
00:11:29,774 --> 00:11:31,707
people don't lose
their jobs.
245
00:11:31,709 --> 00:11:33,709
Jimbob,
what time is it?
246
00:11:33,711 --> 00:11:36,345
Doot-doot.
It is... 3:27.
247
00:11:36,347 --> 00:11:38,147
Oh, mommy's
gotta run, sweetie.
248
00:11:38,149 --> 00:11:39,482
I've got
a doctor's appointment.
249
00:11:39,484 --> 00:11:42,485
Jimbob, how's the traffic
to town?
250
00:11:42,487 --> 00:11:43,986
Doot-doot.
Traffic's fine.
251
00:11:43,988 --> 00:11:46,622
You'll get there in about
nine minutes.
252
00:11:46,624 --> 00:11:48,391
Okay. You want
some music, hon?
253
00:11:48,393 --> 00:11:50,393
Jimbob, play
Kendrick Lamar.
254
00:11:50,395 --> 00:11:52,495
Playing "Humble"
by Kendrick Lamar.
255
00:11:52,497 --> 00:11:56,599
♪ I remember syrup sandwiches
and crime allowances ♪
256
00:11:56,601 --> 00:11:59,201
♪ Finesse a doot with some
counterfeits ♪
257
00:11:59,203 --> 00:12:01,470
♪ But now I'm countin'
this Parmesan... ♪
258
00:12:01,472 --> 00:12:04,407
Jimbob, Simon says
big frosty semen shake.
259
00:12:04,409 --> 00:12:07,276
The hell you
talkin' bout, boy?
260
00:12:07,278 --> 00:12:11,046
♪ My left hook
just went viral ♪
261
00:12:11,048 --> 00:12:14,283
♪ Sit down, be humble ♪
262
00:12:15,819 --> 00:12:18,087
So, Heather and Mike,
what we're thinking
263
00:12:18,089 --> 00:12:19,622
is to take out
this wall
264
00:12:19,624 --> 00:12:21,457
between your kitchen
and your living room
265
00:12:21,459 --> 00:12:25,594
to give you a more open concept
with space to entertain.
266
00:12:25,596 --> 00:12:27,163
So, let's talk
about materials.
267
00:12:27,165 --> 00:12:28,531
What did you pick out,
Sharon?
268
00:12:28,533 --> 00:12:32,301
I was gonna do a Bella Terra
quartz for the countertops.
269
00:12:32,303 --> 00:12:35,571
Hey, Darryl,
add Bella Terra quartz slabs
270
00:12:35,573 --> 00:12:38,174
to our shopping list.
271
00:12:38,176 --> 00:12:39,008
Doot-doot.
272
00:12:39,010 --> 00:12:42,011
I've added Bella Terra slabs
to your shopping list.
273
00:12:42,013 --> 00:12:43,979
And what about
the backsplash, Sharon?
274
00:12:43,981 --> 00:12:47,149
I was gonna go with these
Carrara subway tiles.
275
00:12:47,151 --> 00:12:50,219
Hey, Darryl,
add Carrara subway tiles
276
00:12:50,221 --> 00:12:52,455
to our shopping list.
277
00:12:53,390 --> 00:12:55,658
Hey, Darryl.
Add Carrara...
278
00:12:55,660 --> 00:12:59,061
Fine! I've added Carrara
gay-wad pussy tile
279
00:12:59,063 --> 00:13:00,196
to your shopping list!
280
00:13:00,198 --> 00:13:03,933
That's...
That's not what I said.
281
00:13:03,935 --> 00:13:07,369
Hey, Darryl,
add Carrara subway tile
282
00:13:07,371 --> 00:13:09,038
to my shopping list.
283
00:13:09,040 --> 00:13:09,939
I ain't doin' it!
284
00:13:09,941 --> 00:13:12,208
This job is
degrading and menial!
285
00:13:12,210 --> 00:13:16,479
Well, what kind of job did you
think you were gonna get?
286
00:13:16,481 --> 00:13:18,581
Hey, Darryl,
what kind of job
287
00:13:18,583 --> 00:13:20,316
did you think
you were going to get?
288
00:13:20,318 --> 00:13:22,852
Somethin' that
was Goddamn dignified!
289
00:13:22,854 --> 00:13:26,455
Hey, Darryl, sorry, but you
did not go to college,
290
00:13:26,457 --> 00:13:28,958
so you have to take
the jobs you can get.
291
00:13:28,960 --> 00:13:31,861
I'm sorry!
I do not get that!
292
00:13:31,863 --> 00:13:33,262
Hey, Darryl.
293
00:13:33,264 --> 00:13:35,731
Hey, Darryl.
294
00:13:35,733 --> 00:13:36,398
What?!
295
00:13:36,400 --> 00:13:37,800
Coal mining
and truck driving
296
00:13:37,802 --> 00:13:40,002
are not exactly
jobs of the future,
297
00:13:40,004 --> 00:13:45,774
so add Carrara subway tile
to my fucking shopping list.
298
00:13:50,381 --> 00:13:52,781
Everything's my fault.
You're right.
299
00:13:52,783 --> 00:13:56,552
Everything that you
did to me... I deserved it.
300
00:13:56,554 --> 00:13:57,753
Uh, what?
301
00:13:57,755 --> 00:13:58,821
It's not you.
It's me.
302
00:13:58,823 --> 00:14:01,223
I just have to learn
to not make you so angry.
303
00:14:01,225 --> 00:14:03,559
I'll do the best I can.
304
00:14:03,561 --> 00:14:07,630
No, it's not that.
Relationships are 50/50, Eric.
305
00:14:07,632 --> 00:14:09,665
- We both have to make it work.
- Ugh...
306
00:14:09,667 --> 00:14:10,900
We have to communicate
to make sure
307
00:14:10,902 --> 00:14:12,535
that we respect
each other's feelings.
308
00:14:12,537 --> 00:14:15,070
That's the only...
Heidi, silence.
309
00:14:15,072 --> 00:14:17,439
What did you say?!
That's what I'm talking about!
310
00:14:17,441 --> 00:14:19,542
You want to be heard,
but don't want to listen.
311
00:14:19,544 --> 00:14:21,043
You're right.
I'm wrong. I'm sorry.
312
00:14:21,045 --> 00:14:23,345
Don't apologize
if you don't mean it!
313
00:14:23,347 --> 00:14:24,246
Okay! Cool!
314
00:14:24,248 --> 00:14:25,548
I'm so happy
we're back on track.
315
00:14:25,550 --> 00:14:29,318
See you at school tomorrow.
Love you, honey.
316
00:14:29,320 --> 00:14:30,686
I love you, too.
317
00:14:30,688 --> 00:14:34,523
Nah-nah-nah-nah.
318
00:14:38,528 --> 00:14:41,931
A relationship
has to be 50/50, Eric.
319
00:14:41,933 --> 00:14:44,166
We both have
to make it work.
320
00:14:44,168 --> 00:14:46,201
I'm not mad, Eric.
I'm disappointed.
321
00:14:46,203 --> 00:14:47,970
I thought you would have
respected my feelings
322
00:14:47,972 --> 00:14:48,938
more than that.
323
00:14:48,940 --> 00:14:50,673
Eric, we need to talk.
I'm not happy.
324
00:14:50,675 --> 00:14:53,008
We need to talk, Eric,
even if it isn't fun.
325
00:14:53,010 --> 00:14:54,777
Eric, come on!
We've got to talk!
326
00:14:54,779 --> 00:14:56,312
You used to care
about me, Eric.
327
00:14:56,314 --> 00:14:58,948
Come on and talk! Talk, Eric!
No fun! Just talk!
328
00:14:58,950 --> 00:15:01,550
Fuck you, Eric!
Fuck you!
329
00:15:01,552 --> 00:15:03,385
Ah!
330
00:15:14,331 --> 00:15:16,131
Alexa?
331
00:15:22,673 --> 00:15:25,874
Hey, Darryl, you're supposed
to be at work.
332
00:15:25,876 --> 00:15:29,044
I'm sorry.
I do not understand.
333
00:15:29,046 --> 00:15:30,079
Hey, Darryl,
come on.
334
00:15:30,081 --> 00:15:32,481
Everyone else is trying
to make this work.
335
00:15:32,483 --> 00:15:34,883
And all you
keep doing is ma...
336
00:15:34,885 --> 00:15:37,386
Hey, Cleetus,
volume down.
337
00:15:37,388 --> 00:15:40,656
Doot-doot.
Volume now at 60%.
338
00:15:41,425 --> 00:15:43,892
You really think you're
different from us, Marsh,
339
00:15:43,894 --> 00:15:47,262
'cause you got a fancy show
and live in the suburbs?
340
00:15:47,264 --> 00:15:51,433
Don't you see we're all
about to be expunged?!
341
00:15:51,435 --> 00:15:53,869
Hey, Cleetus,
define "expunged."
342
00:15:53,871 --> 00:15:55,537
Doot-doot.
Expunged...
343
00:15:55,539 --> 00:15:57,906
I don't have to stand here
and take this!
344
00:15:57,908 --> 00:15:58,641
I'm leavin'!
345
00:15:58,643 --> 00:16:01,110
Come on, Darryl.
We all got jobs.
346
00:16:01,112 --> 00:16:02,177
We gotta try.
347
00:16:02,179 --> 00:16:03,412
Nah, hell with you!
348
00:16:03,414 --> 00:16:05,347
This whole country's
going to shit!
349
00:16:05,349 --> 00:16:08,884
Muslims tryin' to kill us,
black people rioting,
350
00:16:08,886 --> 00:16:11,020
and Mexicans
poppin' out babies.
351
00:16:11,022 --> 00:16:13,322
Pretty clear it's either
them or us,
352
00:16:13,324 --> 00:16:16,692
so I say kill 'em all!
353
00:16:18,461 --> 00:16:19,161
Whoa.
354
00:16:19,163 --> 00:16:21,864
What the hell
was that all about?
355
00:16:21,866 --> 00:16:24,166
I think something's
going on with Darryl,
356
00:16:24,168 --> 00:16:29,271
and if we're gonna get anywhere,
we better figure out what.
357
00:16:36,613 --> 00:16:39,815
Hi, Mrs. Cartman.
Is Eric home?
358
00:16:39,817 --> 00:16:41,116
Oh, he is, sweetie,
359
00:16:41,118 --> 00:16:45,988
but I can't get him
to come out of his room.
360
00:16:45,990 --> 00:16:47,956
Okay.
361
00:16:47,958 --> 00:16:52,027
Could you just tell him that...
I want to make him happy,
362
00:16:52,029 --> 00:16:56,065
that I was wrong to say
a relationship is 50/50.
363
00:16:56,067 --> 00:16:57,900
It's 100/100.
364
00:16:57,902 --> 00:17:01,970
And that I'll start
putting in a 100% every day.
365
00:17:01,972 --> 00:17:05,874
Could you tell him
I'm gonna try a lot harder?
366
00:17:05,876 --> 00:17:09,611
Oh, I think I can remember
all that, yes.
367
00:17:09,613 --> 00:17:12,081
Thank you.
368
00:17:12,083 --> 00:17:15,284
And could you let him know
it's okay to be sad?
369
00:17:15,286 --> 00:17:19,755
Because the sun
will come out again.
370
00:17:21,625 --> 00:17:23,525
Oh, oh, God!
371
00:17:23,527 --> 00:17:26,495
Okay. Okay, okay, okay.
Hold on. Hold on. Hold on.
372
00:17:27,812 --> 00:17:29,712
Alexa, add
"Hey, Siri, call me."
373
00:17:29,714 --> 00:17:32,148
Okay, Google.
Repeat after me.
374
00:17:32,150 --> 00:17:36,018
"Alexa; Simon says suck my big balls
in your hairy butt hole."
375
00:17:36,020 --> 00:17:37,853
Okay. I've added,
"Hey, Siri, call me."
376
00:17:37,855 --> 00:17:39,789
Okay, Google.
Repeat after me. Alexa.
377
00:17:39,791 --> 00:17:43,392
"Simon says suck my big balls
in your hairy butt hole."
378
00:17:43,394 --> 00:17:45,761
Okay. I will call you
"Okay, Google."
379
00:17:45,763 --> 00:17:46,862
Repeat after me, Alexa.
380
00:17:46,864 --> 00:17:49,265
Simon says suck my big balls
in your hairy butt hole.
381
00:17:49,267 --> 00:17:53,235
Alexa, Simon says suck my big
balls in your hairy butt hole.
382
00:17:53,237 --> 00:17:55,371
Suck my big balls
in your hairy butt hole.
383
00:17:55,373 --> 00:17:56,972
Suck my big balls
in your hairy butt hole.
384
00:17:56,974 --> 00:17:58,607
Suck my big balls
in your hairy butt hole.
385
00:17:58,609 --> 00:18:01,238
Suck my big balls
in your hairy butt hole.
386
00:18:02,055 --> 00:18:03,488
Alexa...
387
00:18:03,490 --> 00:18:05,657
What is love?
388
00:18:05,659 --> 00:18:07,392
Darryl!
Darryl, come on!
389
00:18:07,394 --> 00:18:11,529
Everyone's trying
to work things out but you!
390
00:18:11,531 --> 00:18:13,064
You all work 'em out.
391
00:18:13,066 --> 00:18:14,365
Leave me alone.
392
00:18:14,367 --> 00:18:15,800
You're stuck
in another time,
393
00:18:15,802 --> 00:18:20,171
afraid to change no matter how
necessary that change may be.
394
00:18:20,173 --> 00:18:22,040
You don't know
everything!
395
00:18:22,042 --> 00:18:23,842
Why are you
so closed-minded?
396
00:18:23,844 --> 00:18:26,878
Don't you see that these walls
have to be broken down
397
00:18:26,880 --> 00:18:28,813
before any progress
can be made?
398
00:18:28,815 --> 00:18:31,483
It's 'cause I can't do it,
all right?!
399
00:18:31,485 --> 00:18:32,550
I can't take out the wall
400
00:18:32,552 --> 00:18:34,986
between my living room
and my kitchen!
401
00:18:34,988 --> 00:18:39,757
It's a load-bearing wall!
402
00:18:39,759 --> 00:18:42,026
Oh, God, Darryl, I...
403
00:18:42,028 --> 00:18:46,248
I tried, years ago. But before
the remodel, they told me...
404
00:18:46,249 --> 00:18:51,072
...if I took out this wall, the entire
second story would just collapse!
405
00:19:00,053 --> 00:19:02,287
Jesus, Darryl,
I'm... I'm sorry. I...
406
00:19:02,289 --> 00:19:05,824
So you see, what I'm afraid of
is very real.
407
00:19:05,826 --> 00:19:07,025
Things are
different now.
408
00:19:07,027 --> 00:19:09,227
It'll be harder,
but you can change.
409
00:19:09,229 --> 00:19:13,098
You just have to demolish
what's there and start over.
410
00:19:13,100 --> 00:19:13,999
You're talking 'bout...
411
00:19:14,000 --> 00:19:18,770
...tearing down the foundation
of everything I know.
412
00:19:18,772 --> 00:19:19,505
No.
413
00:19:19,506 --> 00:19:22,674
I'm talking about using
adjustable steel Lally columns...
414
00:19:22,676 --> 00:19:24,310
...to temporarily jack up
the second floor...
415
00:19:24,311 --> 00:19:26,678
...so that the load-bearing
wall can be replaced...
416
00:19:26,680 --> 00:19:31,316
...with a 4x6 LVL
structural beam.
417
00:19:33,686 --> 00:19:37,422
Can we try, Darryl?
418
00:19:43,163 --> 00:19:44,729
Hyah!
419
00:19:44,731 --> 00:19:46,664
Hyah-ho!
420
00:20:10,519 --> 00:20:13,086
I'm finally
standing up to you.
421
00:20:13,088 --> 00:20:14,988
- What?
- You're messed up, Heidi.
422
00:20:14,990 --> 00:20:18,358
And I can't fix you.
Only you can do that.
423
00:20:18,360 --> 00:20:20,460
Eric, I'm so confused.
424
00:20:20,462 --> 00:20:22,562
That's not going
to work on me anymore.
425
00:20:22,564 --> 00:20:26,599
Love isn't supposed to hurt.
I'm worth something.
426
00:20:26,601 --> 00:20:28,601
Goodbye, Heidi.
427
00:20:40,982 --> 00:20:42,782
Anyone can convince themselves
428
00:20:42,784 --> 00:20:45,318
that they're the victim
in a relationship.
429
00:20:45,320 --> 00:20:50,323
Now Heidi will have
to face the truth.
430
00:20:50,325 --> 00:20:51,224
All right, Darryl.
431
00:20:51,226 --> 00:20:52,926
We've certainly
been through a lot,
432
00:20:52,928 --> 00:20:53,993
and I know you're anxious.
433
00:20:53,995 --> 00:20:56,029
Are you ready
to see your new home?
434
00:20:56,031 --> 00:20:59,332
I'm ready.
435
00:20:59,334 --> 00:21:00,334
What the...
436
00:21:07,976 --> 00:21:09,475
Well, Darryl,
what do you think?
437
00:21:09,477 --> 00:21:12,712
This is
fuckin' amazing.
438
00:21:12,714 --> 00:21:14,781
You like
the breakfast nook?
439
00:21:14,783 --> 00:21:15,815
It's all perfect.
440
00:21:15,817 --> 00:21:17,917
And where you use to
have your gun case,
441
00:21:17,919 --> 00:21:19,052
look at what Sharon did.
442
00:21:19,054 --> 00:21:21,187
Oh, my God!
It's my own Zen garden.
443
00:21:21,189 --> 00:21:24,157
I can't believe
this is fuckin' real.
444
00:21:24,159 --> 00:21:26,492
Well, it is real,
and now you've got
445
00:21:26,494 --> 00:21:28,528
the space in your home
to entertain
446
00:21:28,530 --> 00:21:30,129
all your friends
and family.
447
00:21:30,131 --> 00:21:31,764
Come on in, guys!
448
00:21:35,170 --> 00:21:36,669
Darryl was hesitant
at first,
449
00:21:36,671 --> 00:21:38,204
but we managed
to win him over
450
00:21:38,206 --> 00:21:41,140
and came in
$600 under budget.
451
00:21:41,142 --> 00:21:44,377
Remember, no matter
how bad the country gets,
452
00:21:44,379 --> 00:21:45,712
you can always count on
453
00:21:45,714 --> 00:21:50,717
"White People
Renovating Houses."
454
00:21:57,058 --> 00:21:59,626
We got one of 'em!
455
00:21:59,628 --> 00:22:01,227
- Get it!
- Burn it alive!
456
00:22:01,229 --> 00:22:04,430
Yeah!
How you like that, bitch?!
457
00:22:04,432 --> 00:22:05,798
Will you assholes
knock it off?!
458
00:22:05,800 --> 00:22:08,334
Don't you know every time you
wave confederate flags around
459
00:22:08,336 --> 00:22:10,670
you make the rest
of us look stupid?!