1
00:00:02,576 --> 00:00:05,677
Sheldon, do you want to put
the tables after each section
2
00:00:05,746 --> 00:00:07,712
or in an appendix
at the end?
3
00:00:07,781 --> 00:00:10,048
You know what?
We wrote this paper together.
4
00:00:10,117 --> 00:00:11,816
I think we should
decide together
5
00:00:11,885 --> 00:00:15,220
that they go in an appendix
at the end.
6
00:00:15,289 --> 00:00:17,522
How about that?
There is an "I" in "team."
7
00:00:21,895 --> 00:00:24,563
- Look at what we made.
- I know.
8
00:00:24,631 --> 00:00:26,831
It really is the best
of both of us.
9
00:00:26,900 --> 00:00:29,601
It's got my math
and your sassy takedown
10
00:00:29,670 --> 00:00:31,236
of the fundamental nature
of symmetry.
11
00:00:31,305 --> 00:00:34,039
It's got my bottomless
intellectual curiosity
12
00:00:34,107 --> 00:00:35,874
and your petulant refusal
13
00:00:35,943 --> 00:00:38,777
to spell "gray" with an "a"
like an American.
14
00:00:38,845 --> 00:00:42,514
You realize we still have
a lot of work to do
15
00:00:42,583 --> 00:00:43,882
before we can publish.
16
00:00:43,951 --> 00:00:45,784
Perhaps we should
divide and conquer.
17
00:00:45,852 --> 00:00:48,353
Now, you track down
all the citations
18
00:00:48,422 --> 00:00:49,999
and properly note them
in our bibliography,
19
00:00:50,023 --> 00:00:52,057
and I will roll up
my sleeves
20
00:00:52,125 --> 00:00:54,593
and decide what font
we want to use.
21
00:00:54,661 --> 00:00:58,430
Sheldon, there are hundreds
of citations to track down.
22
00:00:58,498 --> 00:01:01,433
And thousands of fonts, but
you don't hear me complaining.
23
00:01:01,501 --> 00:01:04,536
I am not gonna
spend weeks
24
00:01:04,605 --> 00:01:06,705
in a library
looking up old papers.
25
00:01:06,773 --> 00:01:08,873
Can't we hire
a grad student to do it?
26
00:01:08,942 --> 00:01:10,141
Yeah, a grad student?
27
00:01:10,210 --> 00:01:12,010
I am not trusting
our unpublished paper
28
00:01:12,079 --> 00:01:13,245
to some millennial.
29
00:01:13,313 --> 00:01:14,713
They'll put unicorn emojis on it
30
00:01:14,781 --> 00:01:16,881
and then post it
on social media.
31
00:01:16,950 --> 00:01:18,783
Why would they do that?
32
00:01:18,852 --> 00:01:21,686
Economic anxiety, too much
avocado toast, who cares?
33
00:01:21,755 --> 00:01:25,991
Look, the point is, we can't
afford to have this paper leaked
34
00:01:26,059 --> 00:01:27,325
before we're ready to publish.
35
00:01:27,394 --> 00:01:29,038
That's how you kiss
the Nobel Prize good-bye
36
00:01:29,062 --> 00:01:31,329
instead of hello
as I intend to do.
37
00:01:31,398 --> 00:01:32,764
I assume you mean
metaphorically.
38
00:01:32,833 --> 00:01:35,000
Absolutely not. If the King
of Sweden hands me a medal,
39
00:01:35,068 --> 00:01:37,569
I intend to smear it with Purell
and then kiss it.
40
00:01:37,638 --> 00:01:40,472
But what if we ask one
of our friends to help us out?
41
00:01:40,540 --> 00:01:41,640
How about Leonard?
42
00:01:41,708 --> 00:01:45,176
Gee, I don't know.
Can we trust him?
43
00:01:45,245 --> 00:01:48,079
He's your best friend
in the whole world.
44
00:01:48,148 --> 00:01:49,481
Yes, but he's
always struck me
45
00:01:49,549 --> 00:01:51,082
as the guy in
the plane crash
46
00:01:51,151 --> 00:01:54,185
who doesn't wait until you're
all the way dead to eat you.
47
00:01:55,255 --> 00:01:57,756
I think
you can trust him.
48
00:01:57,824 --> 00:02:00,825
Oh, Amy, you never lose
that childlike innocence.
49
00:02:03,830 --> 00:02:05,930
Leonard, I need
to tell you something.
50
00:02:05,999 --> 00:02:07,999
I'm having an affair.
51
00:02:12,072 --> 00:02:13,571
Okay.
52
00:02:13,640 --> 00:02:16,875
You have to swear
not to tell anybody.
53
00:02:16,943 --> 00:02:18,243
Okay.
54
00:02:18,312 --> 00:02:19,244
(stammers)
55
00:02:19,313 --> 00:02:21,079
You are the only one
who knows.
56
00:02:21,148 --> 00:02:23,114
Uh, well, you and Rita,
the cafeteria lady
57
00:02:23,183 --> 00:02:25,650
who has been giving me
more than Tater Tots.
58
00:02:27,587 --> 00:02:29,154
Hey, Sheldon.
59
00:02:29,222 --> 00:02:31,189
Not a word.
60
00:02:36,296 --> 00:02:38,063
What did he want?
61
00:02:38,131 --> 00:02:39,842
Oh, nothing. He just concocted
some stupid test
62
00:02:39,866 --> 00:02:41,433
to see if I can keep a secret.
63
00:02:41,501 --> 00:02:42,501
Ooh, what's
the secret?
64
00:02:45,205 --> 00:02:47,305
I'm not gonna tell you that.
65
00:02:47,374 --> 00:02:49,153
The test is stupid,
but I still want to pass.
66
00:02:49,154 --> 00:02:51,254
♪ The Big Bang Theory 12x09 ♪
The Citation Negation
Original Air Date o
67
00:02:51,255 --> 00:02:54,790
♪ Our whole universe
was in a hot, dense state ♪
68
00:02:54,848 --> 00:02:58,083
♪ Then nearly 14 billion years
ago expansion started... Wait! ♪
69
00:02:58,151 --> 00:02:59,718
♪ The Earth began to cool ♪
70
00:02:59,786 --> 00:03:02,454
♪ The autotrophs began to drool,
Neanderthals developed tools ♪
71
00:03:02,522 --> 00:03:04,956
♪ We built the Wall ♪
♪ We built the pyramids ♪
72
00:03:05,025 --> 00:03:07,659
♪ Math, Science, History,
unraveling the mystery ♪
73
00:03:07,728 --> 00:03:09,561
♪ That all started
with a big bang ♪
74
00:03:09,629 --> 00:03:11,179
♪ Bang! ♪
75
00:03:11,183 --> 00:03:16,883
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man
76
00:03:19,184 --> 00:03:22,620
Congratulations, Leonard, you
passed my secret loyalty test.
77
00:03:22,621 --> 00:03:24,470
The truth is, I was
never having an affair
78
00:03:24,471 --> 00:03:25,804
with the
cafeteria lady.
79
00:03:25,873 --> 00:03:28,240
There's only one woman who
gets to touch my no-no parts,
80
00:03:28,309 --> 00:03:29,374
and she's right here.
81
00:03:30,377 --> 00:03:32,744
- Sheldon.
- No, no.
82
00:03:34,949 --> 00:03:36,848
Well, I am shocked,
Sheldon,
83
00:03:36,917 --> 00:03:39,051
because I totally believed
that the woman you reported
84
00:03:39,119 --> 00:03:41,653
for being stingy with the peas
couldn't keep her hands off you.
85
00:03:43,257 --> 00:03:45,424
Well, I am a little hurt
that you weren't gonna tell me
86
00:03:45,492 --> 00:03:47,859
my husband was having an affair.
I thought we were friends.
87
00:03:47,928 --> 00:03:49,394
I didn't really believe him.
88
00:03:49,463 --> 00:03:51,641
Why not? You don't think
other women find him attractive?
89
00:03:51,665 --> 00:03:52,831
(laughing):
No.
90
00:03:55,703 --> 00:03:58,904
I suppose you're wondering why
I put you through all this.
91
00:03:58,973 --> 00:04:01,673
You mean the last two minutes
or the last 20 years?
92
00:04:03,110 --> 00:04:05,077
We need to ask you
a big favor.
93
00:04:05,145 --> 00:04:08,046
Well, you've certainly
gone about it the right way.
94
00:04:08,115 --> 00:04:09,726
You know we're almost
finished with our paper;
95
00:04:09,750 --> 00:04:12,250
we just need help
tracking down the citations.
96
00:04:12,319 --> 00:04:15,520
That's busywork. Can't you just
get a grad student to do it?
97
00:04:15,589 --> 00:04:18,857
No, this paper is
incredibly important to us,
98
00:04:18,926 --> 00:04:20,459
and we need someone
we can trust.
99
00:04:20,527 --> 00:04:21,727
Please, it would
mean a lot.
100
00:04:21,795 --> 00:04:23,895
Y-You know what? Sure.
101
00:04:23,964 --> 00:04:26,365
The three of us in the library
looking up old papers--
102
00:04:26,433 --> 00:04:27,799
that actually
could be kind of fun.
103
00:04:27,868 --> 00:04:29,101
Oh, no, we
won't be there.
104
00:04:29,169 --> 00:04:30,769
It just got more fun.
105
00:04:33,574 --> 00:04:36,341
(gunfire sound effects)
106
00:04:36,410 --> 00:04:38,744
Bam, took him out.
(chuckles)
107
00:04:38,812 --> 00:04:41,647
Now I'm doing a victory
dance to celebrate.
108
00:04:41,715 --> 00:04:44,483
(funky music plays)
109
00:04:44,551 --> 00:04:47,119
Where are you?
110
00:04:47,187 --> 00:04:49,821
About to shoot
some dancing jackass.
111
00:04:52,459 --> 00:04:54,459
Hey!
112
00:04:54,528 --> 00:04:57,129
And now I'm doing
a victory dance.
113
00:04:57,197 --> 00:04:58,964
What you playing?
114
00:04:59,033 --> 00:05:00,132
Fortnite.
115
00:05:00,200 --> 00:05:01,867
A bunch of people parachute
onto an island
116
00:05:01,935 --> 00:05:03,935
and fight it out to be
the last man standing.
117
00:05:04,004 --> 00:05:05,103
Like Hunger Games?
118
00:05:05,172 --> 00:05:06,538
More like Bachelor in Paradise,
119
00:05:06,607 --> 00:05:07,906
but not as cutthroat.
120
00:05:09,009 --> 00:05:10,776
Sounds fun. Can I play?
121
00:05:10,844 --> 00:05:13,245
I don't know if you'd like it.
It's kind of for gamers.
122
00:05:13,313 --> 00:05:16,214
Hey, I'm a gamer.
I play Candy Crush, Bejeweled,
123
00:05:16,283 --> 00:05:17,523
and Sesame Street
Letter School,
124
00:05:17,584 --> 00:05:19,424
which I beat our daughter at
every single time.
125
00:05:21,321 --> 00:05:22,788
All right, give it a shot.
126
00:05:22,856 --> 00:05:24,434
This one's how you move,
this is how you shoot.
127
00:05:24,458 --> 00:05:26,525
"A" jumps, "B" puts
you into build mode.
128
00:05:26,593 --> 00:05:28,160
And depending on what
you want to build,
129
00:05:28,228 --> 00:05:29,961
you can use LB, RB,
LT, or RT.
130
00:05:30,030 --> 00:05:32,297
Just put me in,
I'll figure it out.
131
00:05:32,366 --> 00:05:34,666
Oh, sounds like me
on our honeymoon.
132
00:05:36,470 --> 00:05:38,804
Okay, you're
skydiving down.
133
00:05:38,872 --> 00:05:40,906
You're almost
to the ground.
134
00:05:40,974 --> 00:05:43,008
Now, when you land,
you're gonna want... (gunfire)
135
00:05:43,077 --> 00:05:45,143
Okay, you're dead.
136
00:05:45,212 --> 00:05:49,014
Wait, that's it?
That wasn't fun at all.
137
00:05:49,083 --> 00:05:50,949
Oh, now it sounds like
you on our honeymoon.
138
00:05:53,687 --> 00:05:56,188
Thanks for helping with this.
139
00:05:56,256 --> 00:05:57,956
What are friends for?
140
00:05:58,025 --> 00:06:00,959
My friend sent me down to this
basement to do his grunt work,
141
00:06:01,028 --> 00:06:04,529
so I wouldn't know.
142
00:06:04,598 --> 00:06:06,398
Hey, probably shouldn't
say anything,
143
00:06:06,467 --> 00:06:09,735
but did you hear about
Sheldon and the lunch lady?
144
00:06:09,803 --> 00:06:12,104
Yeah, uh, that's not true.
145
00:06:12,172 --> 00:06:14,106
That's just something
Sheldon made up to test us.
146
00:06:14,174 --> 00:06:18,009
I wish I'd known that
before I called her a floozy
147
00:06:18,078 --> 00:06:21,012
in front of
the whole lunch line.
148
00:06:21,081 --> 00:06:23,915
This is a list of the papers
we need to pull.
149
00:06:23,984 --> 00:06:26,418
Why don't we split up?
You take half, I take half.
150
00:06:26,487 --> 00:06:28,186
I don't know, it's pretty
creepy down here.
151
00:06:28,255 --> 00:06:29,654
Maybe we should
stay together.
152
00:06:29,723 --> 00:06:31,490
Come on, Raj,
it's just a library.
153
00:06:31,558 --> 00:06:33,325
You could say that
about anything.
154
00:06:33,393 --> 00:06:35,273
It's just a cemetery.
It's just a haunted house.
155
00:06:35,329 --> 00:06:37,329
It's just a portal to hell.
156
00:06:37,397 --> 00:06:39,998
F-Fine, how about we split up
157
00:06:40,067 --> 00:06:41,911
but we stay in constant
communication with each other?
158
00:06:41,935 --> 00:06:43,902
Yeah, thank you.
159
00:06:51,845 --> 00:06:53,111
Leonard?
160
00:06:53,180 --> 00:06:54,980
- Still here.
- Okay.
161
00:06:59,553 --> 00:07:01,787
- Leonard?
- Still here.
162
00:07:01,855 --> 00:07:03,455
Okay.
163
00:07:09,863 --> 00:07:11,930
Leonard?
164
00:07:13,433 --> 00:07:15,133
Leonard?
165
00:07:15,202 --> 00:07:17,502
(Leonard gasps)
166
00:07:17,571 --> 00:07:18,937
Oh, God!
167
00:07:21,842 --> 00:07:23,475
Too much dust.
168
00:07:26,513 --> 00:07:28,947
(gunfire sound effects)
169
00:07:30,150 --> 00:07:31,449
Hey, ready for lunch?
170
00:07:31,518 --> 00:07:32,617
Hang on.
171
00:07:32,686 --> 00:07:34,953
Really, video games?
172
00:07:35,022 --> 00:07:36,588
Is this some sort of
Freaky Friday thing
173
00:07:36,657 --> 00:07:38,824
where you're actually Howard?
174
00:07:38,892 --> 00:07:41,860
Please, if I were Howard,
I'd be doing this.
175
00:07:44,998 --> 00:07:48,667
You know what? He's not wrong.
176
00:07:48,735 --> 00:07:49,968
All right, great,
can we go?
177
00:07:50,037 --> 00:07:52,637
In a minute. I want to show
Howard I can play this game.
178
00:07:52,706 --> 00:07:55,173
You know, you make
a lot more money than he does.
179
00:07:55,242 --> 00:07:58,009
Can't you just rub
his nose in that?
180
00:07:58,078 --> 00:08:01,112
I can, but I want
to rub his nose in this.
181
00:08:01,181 --> 00:08:04,382
Ugh, damn it,
why can't I hit anybody?
182
00:08:04,451 --> 00:08:05,817
Here, let me try.
183
00:08:05,886 --> 00:08:08,687
Lots of luck--
it's way harder than it looks.
184
00:08:08,755 --> 00:08:10,522
(explosion)
Got him.
185
00:08:14,494 --> 00:08:17,896
Okay, this citation
is correct. How you doing?
186
00:08:17,965 --> 00:08:19,598
Pretty good. I'm just
looking through
187
00:08:19,666 --> 00:08:22,801
"The Effect of High Energy Muons
on Proton Pion Scattering
188
00:08:22,870 --> 00:08:25,804
at the National Accelerator..."
(inhales)
189
00:08:30,043 --> 00:08:31,676
"...Laboratory."
190
00:08:31,745 --> 00:08:34,479
Hey, should we take
a break?
191
00:08:34,548 --> 00:08:36,615
No, this actually
makes it more exciting.
192
00:08:36,683 --> 00:08:39,684
We have to get through all of
this before I run out of this.
193
00:08:39,753 --> 00:08:42,621
It's like the movie Speed,
but instead of a bus,
194
00:08:42,689 --> 00:08:44,456
it's your lungs.
195
00:08:44,491 --> 00:08:47,592
And instead of Sandra Bullock,
it has sadness.
196
00:08:47,661 --> 00:08:50,595
Why did you pull
this Russian paper?
197
00:08:50,664 --> 00:08:52,208
Oh, it was cited
in this paper over here,
198
00:08:52,232 --> 00:08:53,732
so I thought
we should check it out.
199
00:08:53,800 --> 00:08:55,667
Mm, it's not
translated.
200
00:08:55,736 --> 00:08:57,780
Maybe we should talk to Howard;
his Russian's pretty good.
201
00:08:57,804 --> 00:09:01,172
We don't need Howard.
I've got Google Translate.
202
00:09:01,241 --> 00:09:04,042
Okay, here we go,
203
00:09:04,111 --> 00:09:05,944
from Russian to English.
204
00:09:07,347 --> 00:09:12,050
"Examinations of moose chowder
in lemon parachutes."
205
00:09:13,420 --> 00:09:17,789
Yeah, okay, now I know why
this app is free.
206
00:09:19,259 --> 00:09:23,061
Oh, gosh, my Russian's
a little rusty.
207
00:09:23,130 --> 00:09:26,064
If it helps, this word
may be "moose."
208
00:09:30,370 --> 00:09:32,203
Okay.
209
00:09:32,272 --> 00:09:33,638
This paper is called
210
00:09:33,707 --> 00:09:37,442
"Examinations of a
211
00:09:37,511 --> 00:09:40,645
Super-Asymmetric Model
of the Universe"
212
00:09:40,714 --> 00:09:43,915
by Dr. Vasily
Gregora-poli-popivich.
213
00:09:43,984 --> 00:09:45,850
W-Wait, so Amy
and Sheldon
214
00:09:45,919 --> 00:09:47,719
weren't the first
to think of super-asymmetry?
215
00:09:47,754 --> 00:09:50,021
No, doesn't look like it.
This is from 1978.
216
00:09:50,090 --> 00:09:53,625
Okay, well, they might need
to rename their theory
217
00:09:53,694 --> 00:09:57,562
"The Cooper-Fowler
Gregora-poli-popivich Theory."
218
00:09:57,631 --> 00:09:59,511
Kind of rolls right off
your tongue, doesn't it?
219
00:10:01,201 --> 00:10:03,068
Sheldon is not gonna be
happy about this.
220
00:10:03,136 --> 00:10:05,770
Well, he's gonna be less happy
about this, uh...
221
00:10:05,839 --> 00:10:08,406
"The super-asymmetric model
222
00:10:08,475 --> 00:10:11,009
"is inherently flawed
223
00:10:11,078 --> 00:10:14,980
and does not bear the weight
of further examination." Hmm.
224
00:10:15,048 --> 00:10:17,549
So this disproves their theory?
225
00:10:17,617 --> 00:10:18,683
Sounds like it.
226
00:10:18,752 --> 00:10:20,919
Oh, how are we gonna tell him?
227
00:10:20,988 --> 00:10:23,788
That's easy. Just go up to him
and say, "Sheldon,
228
00:10:23,857 --> 00:10:25,790
Raj has something to tell you."
229
00:10:27,361 --> 00:10:29,694
Why do I have to tell him?
230
00:10:29,763 --> 00:10:31,062
You did find it.
231
00:10:31,131 --> 00:10:32,811
I fou-- but he's the one
who translated it.
232
00:10:32,866 --> 00:10:35,433
Okay, okay, h-how about this?
We all tell him.
233
00:10:35,502 --> 00:10:36,935
Or even better: you tell him.
234
00:10:37,004 --> 00:10:40,672
Yeah, that makes the most sense.
235
00:10:40,741 --> 00:10:43,074
You guys are such cowards.
236
00:10:43,143 --> 00:10:45,043
Yes, we are.
237
00:10:56,881 --> 00:10:58,814
Hey, Denise. Is Stuart here?
238
00:10:58,883 --> 00:11:00,382
Oh, no. Doctor's appointment.
239
00:11:00,451 --> 00:11:01,483
Oh, is he okay?
240
00:11:01,552 --> 00:11:03,986
Not since I've known him.
241
00:11:04,054 --> 00:11:07,089
Which brings up
an interesting question.
242
00:11:07,158 --> 00:11:11,426
You and Stuart. Why?
243
00:11:11,495 --> 00:11:14,196
I don't know.
My parents owned a funeral home.
244
00:11:14,265 --> 00:11:16,064
Read into that what you will.
245
00:11:16,133 --> 00:11:18,667
What can I help you with?
246
00:11:18,736 --> 00:11:21,703
I was hoping Stuart could show
me how to play Fortnite.
247
00:11:21,772 --> 00:11:23,572
- Mm, I can teach you.
- Really, you good?
248
00:11:23,641 --> 00:11:26,942
Look at my skin. I haven't been
outside in six years.
249
00:11:27,011 --> 00:11:28,410
So you'll coach me?
250
00:11:28,479 --> 00:11:30,746
Sure. Now let me ask
you a question.
251
00:11:30,815 --> 00:11:33,182
Howard. Why?
252
00:11:34,285 --> 00:11:36,885
You got eyes--
what do you think?
253
00:11:41,091 --> 00:11:43,125
(sighs)
254
00:11:43,194 --> 00:11:45,127
(groans)
255
00:11:48,332 --> 00:11:50,265
(mutters)
256
00:11:54,038 --> 00:11:56,705
(groans, mutters)
257
00:11:59,476 --> 00:12:01,577
(groans)
258
00:12:01,645 --> 00:12:03,879
Wow, I really wish
I didn't see this.
259
00:12:03,948 --> 00:12:05,981
Oh, hey.
260
00:12:06,050 --> 00:12:08,851
I just need to give Sheldon
some bad news,
261
00:12:08,919 --> 00:12:10,719
and I really don't want to.
262
00:12:10,788 --> 00:12:12,966
- Oh, my God. Is everything okay?
- No, I-I found a paper
263
00:12:12,990 --> 00:12:14,923
that proves their theory wrong.
264
00:12:14,992 --> 00:12:16,925
They thought this was gonna
be their Nobel Prize.
265
00:12:16,994 --> 00:12:18,427
It's gonna break his heart.
266
00:12:18,495 --> 00:12:21,830
Oh, man. Maybe leave
an anonymous note, you know,
267
00:12:21,899 --> 00:12:23,832
like in high school,
when you want to let
268
00:12:23,901 --> 00:12:27,169
your best friend know that
her boyfriend's cheating on her.
269
00:12:27,238 --> 00:12:29,905
Why wouldn't
you just tell her that?
270
00:12:29,974 --> 00:12:32,741
I don't know.
Maybe you had a hickey.
271
00:12:35,646 --> 00:12:37,390
I-Isn't it better
to get bad news from a friend?
272
00:12:37,414 --> 00:12:38,680
Trust me, it's not.
273
00:12:38,749 --> 00:12:40,983
I went to prom
with a hickey and a black eye.
274
00:12:42,586 --> 00:12:44,306
Come on, knock on the door.
You can do this.
275
00:12:44,355 --> 00:12:46,321
All right, a-all right,
here I go.
276
00:12:46,390 --> 00:12:48,156
Oh, wait, just let me
get inside.
277
00:12:48,225 --> 00:12:49,825
Why?
278
00:12:49,894 --> 00:12:52,494
"Why"? Come on.
279
00:12:53,764 --> 00:12:55,397
(door closes)
280
00:12:57,501 --> 00:12:59,368
Oh, hey, Leonard.
281
00:12:59,436 --> 00:13:00,669
Is the podcast too loud?
282
00:13:00,738 --> 00:13:01,970
I didn't hear a podcast.
283
00:13:02,039 --> 00:13:05,958
I told you no one could hear it.
284
00:13:06,026 --> 00:13:08,794
Well, I heard Ira Glass,
so he's either in your earbuds
285
00:13:08,862 --> 00:13:11,313
or clinging to the ceiling
like a gecko.
286
00:13:13,784 --> 00:13:16,668
Actually, I-I need to talk to
both of you about your paper.
287
00:13:16,737 --> 00:13:18,487
Oh, right,
how are the citations coming?
288
00:13:18,555 --> 00:13:20,033
Well, Raj and I were
chasing them down
289
00:13:20,057 --> 00:13:23,058
like you asked us to, and, um,
290
00:13:23,127 --> 00:13:24,426
we came a-across a,
291
00:13:24,495 --> 00:13:28,830
a Russian paper that seems
to disprove super-asymmetry.
292
00:13:28,899 --> 00:13:31,199
Are you sure?
293
00:13:31,268 --> 00:13:34,303
Yeah, uh, Howard translated it.
294
00:13:35,806 --> 00:13:37,739
I'm so sorry.
295
00:13:40,878 --> 00:13:43,045
Sheldon,
are you, are you all right?
296
00:13:43,113 --> 00:13:45,314
Oh, yes, of course.
297
00:13:45,382 --> 00:13:47,282
Thank you for telling us,
Leonard.
298
00:13:47,351 --> 00:13:48,450
I'm sure that wasn't easy.
299
00:13:50,788 --> 00:13:52,721
I guess we don't need
this anymore.
300
00:13:52,790 --> 00:13:55,457
(sighs)
301
00:14:05,235 --> 00:14:07,169
(screams)
302
00:14:11,775 --> 00:14:16,311
So what are you listening to,
This American Life?
303
00:14:19,183 --> 00:14:21,750
Okay, so walk up to
that chest and push X.
304
00:14:21,819 --> 00:14:23,885
X. Push X.
305
00:14:23,954 --> 00:14:25,053
Which one's X?
306
00:14:25,122 --> 00:14:28,156
The one with the X on it.
307
00:14:28,225 --> 00:14:29,725
Take it easy,
I'm new at this.
308
00:14:29,793 --> 00:14:32,060
What, the alphabet?
309
00:14:32,129 --> 00:14:34,262
You don't have to be snarky.
310
00:14:34,331 --> 00:14:35,542
Hey, do you want
to play the game,
311
00:14:35,566 --> 00:14:36,806
or do you want to crawl back up
312
00:14:36,867 --> 00:14:39,868
your mommy's shirt
and chow down like a baby?
313
00:14:39,937 --> 00:14:42,270
Damn, what is wrong with you?
314
00:14:42,339 --> 00:14:44,217
I'm sorry, I thought you
wanted to beat your husband.
315
00:14:44,241 --> 00:14:45,907
- I do.
- Well, then suck it up!
316
00:14:45,976 --> 00:14:47,542
Okay!
317
00:14:50,114 --> 00:14:52,047
(knocking on door)
318
00:14:54,518 --> 00:14:56,752
Hi.
319
00:14:56,820 --> 00:14:58,186
Can I do anything?
320
00:14:58,255 --> 00:15:00,956
No.
321
00:15:01,025 --> 00:15:03,625
I can make you some tea,
I-I could sing "Soft Kitty."
322
00:15:03,694 --> 00:15:05,961
I don't understand how
you're not more upset by this.
323
00:15:06,030 --> 00:15:07,129
This is your paper, too.
324
00:15:07,197 --> 00:15:10,165
I am upset, Sheldon.
325
00:15:10,234 --> 00:15:13,168
I'm just trying to hold
it together for you.
326
00:15:13,237 --> 00:15:17,572
Like when that goose wouldn't
leave us alone at brunch.
327
00:15:17,641 --> 00:15:19,174
That thing scared you, too?
328
00:15:19,243 --> 00:15:24,146
Well, of course it did.
I was wearing a down jacket.
329
00:15:24,214 --> 00:15:26,648
Well, I don't need you
to pretend to be okay for me.
330
00:15:26,717 --> 00:15:27,961
If anything,
that makes it worse.
331
00:15:27,985 --> 00:15:32,554
Fine. I'm not okay.
332
00:15:32,623 --> 00:15:34,756
We came up with this idea
at our wedding.
333
00:15:34,825 --> 00:15:37,759
We poured months
of our lives into it.
334
00:15:37,828 --> 00:15:39,928
I thought we were changing
the course of science,
335
00:15:39,997 --> 00:15:43,298
and now it's all gone.
I'm devastated.
336
00:15:44,701 --> 00:15:46,635
I was wrong,
that makes it worse.
337
00:15:46,703 --> 00:15:47,803
Go back to being happy.
338
00:15:51,375 --> 00:15:53,442
(gunfire over computer)
339
00:15:55,546 --> 00:15:56,711
Hey, guys.
340
00:15:56,780 --> 00:15:58,180
- Hey.
- Hey.
341
00:15:58,248 --> 00:16:00,482
You, uh, playing that,
what's it called again?
342
00:16:00,551 --> 00:16:03,018
Fortnow?
343
00:16:03,087 --> 00:16:04,853
- Fortnite.
- Right.
344
00:16:04,922 --> 00:16:07,222
I guess I forgot 'cause I only
played it that one time
345
00:16:07,291 --> 00:16:10,826
and I was so bad at it.
346
00:16:10,894 --> 00:16:13,128
Don't beat yourself up.
It's a hard game.
347
00:16:13,197 --> 00:16:15,297
Would you mind if I gave it
another shot?
348
00:16:15,365 --> 00:16:16,865
Mm, maybe later, Berna...
349
00:16:16,934 --> 00:16:19,534
Give me.
350
00:16:19,603 --> 00:16:22,904
Where are you, Howard,
where are you?
351
00:16:22,973 --> 00:16:26,842
Let me just build a little ramp,
get some height.
352
00:16:26,910 --> 00:16:30,979
You want to press B to go into
build-- oh, you already did it.
353
00:16:31,048 --> 00:16:33,415
Did I? I'm just hitting buttons.
354
00:16:33,484 --> 00:16:34,716
Wee!
355
00:16:36,887 --> 00:16:39,020
I see your ramp.
I'm coming for you.
356
00:16:39,089 --> 00:16:41,056
You can try, but...
(explosion sound effect)
357
00:16:41,125 --> 00:16:42,524
Gotcha.
(chuckles)
358
00:16:42,593 --> 00:16:46,661
Son of a bitch.
359
00:16:46,730 --> 00:16:47,929
Want to play again?
360
00:16:47,998 --> 00:16:49,131
No!
361
00:16:51,435 --> 00:16:53,168
- Howard.
- What?
362
00:16:53,237 --> 00:16:55,704
I make more money than you.
363
00:16:58,909 --> 00:17:01,877
You got yourself
a good one there, buddy.
364
00:17:04,848 --> 00:17:07,282
So neither of them
showed up for work today?
365
00:17:07,351 --> 00:17:08,895
No, I tried calling
and no one picked up.
366
00:17:08,919 --> 00:17:10,318
Look, I'm sure
they're fine.
367
00:17:10,387 --> 00:17:12,365
They were probably up all night
coming up with a new theory.
368
00:17:12,389 --> 00:17:15,190
I-I also texted to see
if he wanted to go to the new
369
00:17:15,259 --> 00:17:17,759
Fantastic Beasts movie
and he didn't respond.
370
00:17:17,828 --> 00:17:20,388
All right, well, they're already
dead. There's nothing we can do.
371
00:17:25,602 --> 00:17:27,936
SHELDON:
Come in.
372
00:17:32,442 --> 00:17:34,409
PENNY:
Hey...
373
00:17:34,478 --> 00:17:38,246
You guys look all comfy.
Did-did you take the day off?
374
00:17:38,315 --> 00:17:40,649
It's Saturday.
375
00:17:40,717 --> 00:17:42,817
No, it's not.
376
00:17:42,886 --> 00:17:46,621
Great, another thing
we're wrong about.
377
00:17:48,158 --> 00:17:50,492
How many does
that make, Amy?
378
00:17:50,561 --> 00:17:53,929
Two.
379
00:17:53,997 --> 00:17:55,764
Two things.
380
00:17:55,832 --> 00:17:58,633
What happened to us?
381
00:17:58,702 --> 00:18:00,769
I'll tell you what happened.
382
00:18:00,837 --> 00:18:03,805
Professor Gregoropovich.
383
00:18:03,874 --> 00:18:06,408
I-I think it's
Gregora-poli-popivich, but...
384
00:18:12,950 --> 00:18:15,116
Three.
385
00:18:15,185 --> 00:18:19,120
Look, you guys, you had a,
you had a setback, you know?
386
00:18:19,189 --> 00:18:21,756
This is the time you got to
dig in and-and try harder.
387
00:18:21,825 --> 00:18:24,659
It's like halftime
and you're down by seven.
388
00:18:25,829 --> 00:18:26,962
What are you doing?
389
00:18:27,030 --> 00:18:28,163
All right,
it's-it's like
390
00:18:28,232 --> 00:18:30,732
Bat-halftime and you're down
by Bat-seven.
391
00:18:32,402 --> 00:18:33,802
Let me try.
392
00:18:33,870 --> 00:18:36,438
You-you guys can't just give up.
393
00:18:36,506 --> 00:18:38,418
Uh, individually, you are
the smartest people I know.
394
00:18:38,442 --> 00:18:40,809
Together, you can do anything.
395
00:18:40,877 --> 00:18:42,922
I appreciate what you're trying
to do but please stop.
396
00:18:42,946 --> 00:18:45,146
You can't make this better.
397
00:18:45,215 --> 00:18:47,148
- All right, Amy, listen...
- I'm with Sheldon.
398
00:18:47,217 --> 00:18:48,883
We worked our butts off
on this paper
399
00:18:48,952 --> 00:18:50,452
and it was all for nothing.
400
00:18:50,520 --> 00:18:52,687
And if you think
some pep talk can fix that,
401
00:18:52,756 --> 00:18:56,024
then you don't understand
how much this meant to us.
402
00:18:56,093 --> 00:18:57,325
Is there anything we can do?
403
00:18:57,394 --> 00:18:59,160
No.
404
00:18:59,229 --> 00:19:00,795
Yeah-- wait.
405
00:19:00,864 --> 00:19:02,664
Do I smell Siam Palace?
406
00:19:02,733 --> 00:19:05,166
Oh, yeah, it's our dinner.
407
00:19:09,873 --> 00:19:12,374
I mean, it's your dinner.
408
00:19:12,442 --> 00:19:15,143
Any mango sticky rice?
409
00:19:15,212 --> 00:19:16,311
PENNY:
No.
410
00:19:16,380 --> 00:19:18,713
And the blows keep coming.
411
00:19:26,025 --> 00:19:29,260
I see you. I see you...
412
00:19:29,328 --> 00:19:30,761
and boom.
(explosion sound effect)
413
00:19:30,830 --> 00:19:33,764
Gotcha! How's it feel, Penny?
414
00:19:33,833 --> 00:19:37,134
Like I don't care at all.
415
00:19:37,203 --> 00:19:39,870
Wrong, it feels bad because
you lost and I won.
416
00:19:39,939 --> 00:19:41,972
Whoo! What a rush!
417
00:19:42,041 --> 00:19:44,308
All right, can we go eat now?
418
00:19:44,377 --> 00:19:45,377
- Hell yeah.
- All right.
419
00:19:45,444 --> 00:19:46,577
Hey, how's it going?
420
00:19:46,646 --> 00:19:49,179
Boom!
421
00:19:50,550 --> 00:19:53,617
Okay, I'm-I'm gonna drive.
422
00:19:54,163 --> 00:20:01,163
== sync, corrected by elderman ==
@elder_man