1 00:00:01,001 --> 00:00:02,866 [Mary Alice] Previously on Desperate Housewives: 2 00:00:02,936 --> 00:00:04,301 The new neighbor... 3 00:00:04,371 --> 00:00:05,998 - He's cute. - He's a bachelor. 4 00:00:06,072 --> 00:00:07,699 ... became a hero... 5 00:00:09,209 --> 00:00:12,110 ... in a crisis that brought Julie and Austin together, 6 00:00:12,178 --> 00:00:14,510 while Carlos and Gabby broke apart. 7 00:00:14,581 --> 00:00:18,017 I had a career and a future, but I gave it all up for you. 8 00:00:18,084 --> 00:00:19,984 - And what did I get in return? - Hey! 9 00:00:20,053 --> 00:00:23,216 [Mary Alice] The police assembled their pieces of evidence. 10 00:00:23,289 --> 00:00:26,349 - Your number was written on her hand. - I can't help you. 11 00:00:26,426 --> 00:00:28,485 No memory, huh? That's convenient. 12 00:00:34,200 --> 00:00:38,000 [Mary Alice] Karen McCluskey had always believed in helping others, 13 00:00:38,071 --> 00:00:41,302 whether they wanted her help or not. 14 00:00:42,842 --> 00:00:45,606 - What's all this? - You know how you never got around 15 00:00:45,678 --> 00:00:48,203 to painting your garage door? Well, it's done. 16 00:00:49,015 --> 00:00:50,710 Hope you like blue. 17 00:00:53,420 --> 00:00:57,151 - Baxter. You found him. - Yeah, and I got him neutered, too. 18 00:00:57,223 --> 00:01:00,249 I figured you wouldn't want any more strays around here. 19 00:01:02,162 --> 00:01:04,130 - Karen. - Hi, Alberta. 20 00:01:04,197 --> 00:01:07,963 I took these down for you since, you know, Christmas was six months ago. 21 00:01:09,669 --> 00:01:12,194 [Mary Alice] Yes, Mrs. McCluskey's helping hand 22 00:01:12,272 --> 00:01:14,638 was known throughout Wisteria Lane. 23 00:01:14,707 --> 00:01:18,006 But on this day it was about to get slapped. 24 00:01:18,078 --> 00:01:20,069 - What the hell are you doing? - [gasps] 25 00:01:20,146 --> 00:01:22,808 Jeez, Edie, you scared me. What're you doing? 26 00:01:22,882 --> 00:01:26,579 Getting Mike's house ready. He comes back from the hospital tomorrow. 27 00:01:26,653 --> 00:01:28,780 Since when do you have a key to his garage? 28 00:01:28,855 --> 00:01:31,688 He gave me one, in case of an emergency. 29 00:01:31,758 --> 00:01:33,521 Don't lie to me, prune. 30 00:01:33,593 --> 00:01:37,120 Fine. I found it under his mat. I'm not doing anything wrong. 31 00:01:37,197 --> 00:01:41,065 I come over once a week and start his mower so the engine doesn't get rusty. 32 00:01:41,134 --> 00:01:43,295 And do you mow your lawn with it, too? 33 00:01:43,369 --> 00:01:45,564 What's the big deal? I'm doing him a favor. 34 00:01:45,638 --> 00:01:47,868 Well, he doesn't need any favors from you. 35 00:01:47,941 --> 00:01:50,432 I'm gonna go through Mike's house room by room, 36 00:01:50,510 --> 00:01:54,037 and if I find one paper clip missing, I'm calling the cops. 37 00:01:54,114 --> 00:01:56,605 Funny you should talk about stuff that's missing. 38 00:01:56,683 --> 00:01:59,516 I found those pictures of Mike and Susan you threw out. 39 00:02:00,587 --> 00:02:03,522 - Pictures? - Oh, don't act for me. 40 00:02:03,590 --> 00:02:06,218 I know Mike's been having troubles with his memory. 41 00:02:06,292 --> 00:02:09,022 My guess, you don't want him to remember 44 00:02:15,435 --> 00:02:17,960 Oh, Edie? I saved the pictures. 45 00:02:19,572 --> 00:02:22,973 And I can show them to Mike any time I like. 46 00:02:25,912 --> 00:02:29,575 [Mary Alice] Yes, Karen McCluskey believed in helping others. 47 00:02:29,649 --> 00:02:31,674 Where are you going with this? 48 00:02:31,751 --> 00:02:34,151 Which she felt gave her the right... 49 00:02:37,190 --> 00:02:39,988 ... to help herself. 50 00:03:21,367 --> 00:03:22,994 Remember to be polite. Smile. 51 00:03:23,069 --> 00:03:25,902 [Mary Alice] Each year, as part of their fundraising drive, 52 00:03:25,972 --> 00:03:29,669 the Fairview Adventure Scouts would award a shiny new bike 53 00:03:29,742 --> 00:03:33,007 to whoever sold the most magazine subscriptions. 54 00:03:33,079 --> 00:03:35,479 And each Scout would set out, 55 00:03:35,548 --> 00:03:38,608 utterly convinced the prize would be hers. 56 00:03:40,753 --> 00:03:42,778 That's the beauty of youth. 57 00:03:42,855 --> 00:03:45,722 Little girls believe anything is possible. 58 00:03:46,793 --> 00:03:50,752 That is, until they grow up and get divorced. 59 00:03:50,830 --> 00:03:54,960 Hi. What if I told you there is a way you could help children 60 00:03:55,034 --> 00:03:58,731 while also reading your favorite magazines at a reduced price? 61 00:03:58,805 --> 00:04:02,866 - Would you like to hear more? - Sure. Knock yourself out. 62 00:04:02,942 --> 00:04:04,273 Wise choice. 63 00:04:04,344 --> 00:04:08,474 For the lady of the house we offer Redbook, Glamour, 64 00:04:08,548 --> 00:04:11,176 - Vog-you. - I think you mean Vogue, sweetie. 65 00:04:11,251 --> 00:04:14,220 - You sure? - I should know. I was on the cover. 66 00:04:15,521 --> 00:04:17,455 No way. 67 00:04:18,458 --> 00:04:19,948 Uh, way. 68 00:04:20,026 --> 00:04:21,493 [gasps] 69 00:04:23,396 --> 00:04:27,992 See the coat I'm wearing in this shot? That's genuine ocelot fur. [laughs] 70 00:04:28,067 --> 00:04:30,627 Although the photographer was the real animal, 71 00:04:30,703 --> 00:04:32,694 if you know what I'm saying. [chuckles] 72 00:04:34,374 --> 00:04:36,433 Which I hope you don't. 73 00:04:37,944 --> 00:04:39,639 And don't ever do drugs, OK? 74 00:04:39,712 --> 00:04:42,875 Being a model must be so amazing. 75 00:04:42,949 --> 00:04:44,246 Why did you stop? 76 00:04:45,151 --> 00:04:49,520 Well, I fell in love, got married and moved to the suburbs 77 00:04:49,589 --> 00:04:52,990 for the whole fairy tale, happy ending thing. 78 00:04:53,059 --> 00:04:55,323 That was a crock. 79 00:04:55,395 --> 00:04:57,522 So, you going back to modeling? 80 00:04:58,231 --> 00:05:00,165 No. No, no, no, no, no. [chuckles] 81 00:05:00,233 --> 00:05:03,532 Why not? What else are you gonna do? 82 00:05:07,040 --> 00:05:09,508 You're going back to modeling? This is so sudden. 83 00:05:09,575 --> 00:05:12,669 Let's not get ahead of ourselves. I'm gonna fly to New York, 84 00:05:12,745 --> 00:05:15,145 meet with my old agent, and take it from there. 85 00:05:16,983 --> 00:05:18,507 Come on, you guys. 86 00:05:18,584 --> 00:05:21,144 This is exciting. Be happy for me. 87 00:05:21,220 --> 00:05:24,280 Oh, we are. We're just gonna miss you, that's all. 88 00:05:24,357 --> 00:05:27,918 Now that my divorce is final, I need a reason to wake up in the morning. 89 00:05:27,994 --> 00:05:31,225 I have this hole in my life that can't be filled by shopping. 90 00:05:32,899 --> 00:05:34,730 That's right. I said it. 91 00:05:38,237 --> 00:05:39,864 Oh, my gosh, Lynette. 92 00:05:43,910 --> 00:05:46,344 I'll get the kids. They're dying to see you. 93 00:05:46,412 --> 00:05:49,210 - OK. Hey! - Hey. 94 00:05:49,282 --> 00:05:52,911 Oh, my gosh. You didn't have to do this! 95 00:05:52,985 --> 00:05:55,954 - Hi. - You look great. 96 00:05:56,022 --> 00:05:59,458 Apparently taking a.38 slug to the shoulder agrees with you. 97 00:05:59,525 --> 00:06:03,552 Yeah. Um, listen, about that, the kids don't know what happened. 98 00:06:03,629 --> 00:06:06,097 - They don't? - They're a little young to deal with 99 00:06:06,165 --> 00:06:10,124 their mother getting shot. I told them Kayla is staying with her grandmother 100 00:06:10,203 --> 00:06:12,194 and I made up a story about how I got hurt. 101 00:06:12,271 --> 00:06:13,795 - [boy] Hey, Mom! - Here they are. 102 00:06:13,873 --> 00:06:17,502 Hey. Hello. Oh, this side. Hi. 103 00:06:18,044 --> 00:06:19,306 Hello! [kisses] 104 00:06:19,379 --> 00:06:21,711 I can't believe you got in a fight with a hobo. 105 00:06:23,816 --> 00:06:27,013 Yeah. Let's see how well you do on a morphine drip. 106 00:06:27,086 --> 00:06:30,920 Mommy, come inside. We helped Mrs. McCluskey make your favorite lunch. 107 00:06:30,990 --> 00:06:33,356 Fantastic. Lead the way. I'm coming in. 108 00:06:33,426 --> 00:06:35,656 - Hurry up. I'm hungry. - Let's go, let's go. 109 00:06:35,728 --> 00:06:38,891 There she is. Hi, bunny, bunny. 110 00:06:43,102 --> 00:06:46,731 Hey. Why don't you go inside and get the party started? I've gotta... 111 00:06:46,806 --> 00:06:48,865 Hi, bunny. I'll be right there. 112 00:06:53,980 --> 00:06:55,572 - Hey. - Hey! 113 00:06:55,648 --> 00:06:57,673 Lynette, you're home. 114 00:06:57,750 --> 00:06:59,843 - Yeah. - How are you doing? 115 00:06:59,919 --> 00:07:02,149 I'm good. I just... 116 00:07:04,957 --> 00:07:09,053 How do I thank the man who saved my life? 117 00:07:10,563 --> 00:07:12,258 You don't have to say anything. 118 00:07:16,402 --> 00:07:17,926 I'm gonna make you a cake. 119 00:07:18,004 --> 00:07:19,528 [chuckles] 120 00:07:19,605 --> 00:07:20,902 - A cake? - Yeah. 121 00:07:20,973 --> 00:07:23,066 I never make cakes. This is huge. 122 00:07:23,142 --> 00:07:26,908 In that case, thanks. 123 00:07:30,983 --> 00:07:32,974 [sniffles, sighs] 124 00:07:33,453 --> 00:07:35,751 Yeah, I'm gonna make you a cake! 125 00:07:38,391 --> 00:07:40,154 [Jingle Bells playing] 126 00:07:40,226 --> 00:07:42,786 Christmas carols? It's not even Thanksgiving. 127 00:07:42,862 --> 00:07:44,921 I'm starting my cards early this year. 128 00:07:44,997 --> 00:07:47,488 It puts me in the mood to spread holiday cheer. 129 00:07:47,567 --> 00:07:50,434 And with this pack of lies in this family newsletter, 130 00:07:50,503 --> 00:07:54,599 - she spreads holiday denial. - Nobody wants the truth at Christmas. 131 00:07:54,674 --> 00:07:57,370 - Well said, darling. - Would you put on another CD? 132 00:07:57,443 --> 00:07:59,570 Something with sleigh bells. 133 00:07:59,645 --> 00:08:01,408 Oh, by the way, Orson, 134 00:08:01,481 --> 00:08:04,279 I need your mother's address at the nursing home. 135 00:08:05,318 --> 00:08:09,516 Oh. Well, I appreciate the thought, but you needn't send her a card. 136 00:08:09,589 --> 00:08:12,888 Don't be silly. I'm sending one to the man who reads our gas meter. 137 00:08:12,959 --> 00:08:15,325 - I can send one to your mother. - She's senile. 138 00:08:15,394 --> 00:08:18,955 - She'll try to dunk it in her coffee. - All the more reason to send one. 139 00:08:19,031 --> 00:08:22,159 Let the nurses know that she has family at home who loves her, 140 00:08:22,235 --> 00:08:26,831 and who could drop by at any minute and slap them with a lawsuit. 141 00:08:26,906 --> 00:08:28,601 Bree, I hear what you're saying. 142 00:08:28,674 --> 00:08:31,370 Orson, what's the big deal? It's just an address. 143 00:08:33,279 --> 00:08:35,509 Fine. I'll get my book. 144 00:08:35,581 --> 00:08:37,708 The home is somewhere over in Lakeview. 145 00:08:38,551 --> 00:08:41,884 Lakeview? You gave me the impression that she was back east. 146 00:08:41,954 --> 00:08:45,151 That's because I wanted to avoid this conversation. 147 00:08:45,224 --> 00:08:48,625 If she's only 30 minutes away, why haven't you been visiting her? 148 00:08:49,095 --> 00:08:53,259 OK, the truth is, it breaks my heart to see her now. 149 00:08:53,332 --> 00:08:55,300 I want to remember her as she was. 150 00:08:55,368 --> 00:08:57,359 - But, Orson... - Bree! 151 00:08:57,436 --> 00:09:01,099 I refuse to sit in a room that smells of disinfectant and lime Jell-O 152 00:09:01,173 --> 00:09:04,108 making small talk with a woman who doesn't remember me. 153 00:09:04,176 --> 00:09:05,507 Now let it go, damn it. 154 00:09:06,345 --> 00:09:09,109 [Sleigh Ride playing] 155 00:09:11,651 --> 00:09:14,017 But, by all means, do send a card. 156 00:09:17,023 --> 00:09:18,957 The elves will tickle her. 157 00:09:26,265 --> 00:09:28,165 - Well, shall we? - Wait. 158 00:09:28,234 --> 00:09:31,135 Julie's gonna know we came home early to check up on her. 159 00:09:31,203 --> 00:09:34,138 I don't want her to think I'm overprotective and clingy. 160 00:09:34,206 --> 00:09:37,539 The girl was held hostage. It's natural you're gonna be clingy. 161 00:09:37,610 --> 00:09:40,170 Yeah, it's been a week. I'm getting on her nerves. 162 00:09:40,246 --> 00:09:43,875 How about this? We came home early because we hated the restaurant. 163 00:09:43,950 --> 00:09:46,714 The service was dreadful. The lobster was inedible. 164 00:09:46,786 --> 00:09:48,310 OK. 165 00:09:53,259 --> 00:09:56,820 Wait. If we hated the restaurant, then why are we bringing home food? 166 00:09:56,896 --> 00:09:58,193 Good point. 167 00:09:58,264 --> 00:10:00,255 No, no, wait, wait! Are you kidding? 168 00:10:00,333 --> 00:10:04,633 That's lobster. OK. I thought the restaurant was fantastic. 169 00:10:05,838 --> 00:10:08,932 You were the fussy snob who was impossible to please. 170 00:10:09,008 --> 00:10:11,340 Why do I have to be the fussy snob? 171 00:10:12,044 --> 00:10:14,478 - Because you're British. - Fine. 172 00:10:14,547 --> 00:10:18,415 I trust you'll make it up to me later by doing the things a gentleman expects 173 00:10:18,484 --> 00:10:21,248 - when he's sprung for lobster. - Hmm. 174 00:10:21,320 --> 00:10:23,379 [both laugh] 175 00:10:23,456 --> 00:10:26,391 [chuckling] 176 00:10:34,000 --> 00:10:36,230 I'm not getting any tonight, am I? 177 00:10:39,672 --> 00:10:42,470 - You're supposed to be having dinner. - It's my fault. 178 00:10:42,541 --> 00:10:45,009 - I found the restaurant to be... - Oh, let it go. 179 00:10:45,077 --> 00:10:48,513 We came home because I was worried about you. And with good reason! 180 00:10:48,581 --> 00:10:53,109 - You put on your shirt and get out! - But I didn't bring a shirt. 181 00:10:54,553 --> 00:10:57,488 - See, I was out running... - Who cares? Go! 182 00:10:59,659 --> 00:11:03,686 How could you? If Austin hadn't been in that supermarket, I might not be here. 183 00:11:03,763 --> 00:11:07,699 I am grateful, but I found a way to say thank you without taking my top off. 184 00:11:07,767 --> 00:11:10,668 A couple buttons came undone. Not like my boobs were out. 185 00:11:10,736 --> 00:11:14,001 OK. Well, it's, uh, it's getting late. And I really... 186 00:11:14,073 --> 00:11:16,268 No, Ian, am I overreacting here? 187 00:11:16,342 --> 00:11:18,537 I can understand on the heels of a crisis, 188 00:11:18,611 --> 00:11:21,512 two people might bond and find themselves... 189 00:11:21,580 --> 00:11:24,572 - You're a very naughty girl! - Julie. 190 00:11:24,650 --> 00:11:28,381 That boy drinks, he steals, and now I find him mauling you on my couch. 191 00:11:28,454 --> 00:11:30,183 That's it. I forbid you to see him. 192 00:11:30,256 --> 00:11:32,190 You can't do that. I choose who I date. 193 00:11:32,258 --> 00:11:35,284 Yeah? Well, I choose to ground you. Two weeks, baby. 194 00:11:35,361 --> 00:11:36,555 I'll see him at school. 195 00:11:36,629 --> 00:11:39,564 - You won't. I'll homeschool. - You're gonna teach me trig? 196 00:11:39,632 --> 00:11:42,897 - You can't balance your checkbook. - You'll be poorly educated. 197 00:11:42,968 --> 00:11:45,994 You won't get into college, you'll work for minimum wage. 198 00:11:46,072 --> 00:11:49,530 All because of that boy! I hope you're happy! 199 00:11:49,608 --> 00:11:51,906 Mom, I like this guy. 200 00:11:51,977 --> 00:11:56,038 I'm sorry if it makes you unhappy, but I'm going to keep seeing him. 201 00:12:06,592 --> 00:12:08,583 Ta-da! 202 00:12:08,661 --> 00:12:12,995 Doesn't the place look great? I came in and straightened up. 203 00:12:13,065 --> 00:12:15,295 I wanted everything to look nice for you. 204 00:12:17,770 --> 00:12:19,362 Are you OK? 205 00:12:21,440 --> 00:12:24,204 Yeah. Yeah, it's just that... 206 00:12:24,276 --> 00:12:28,076 ...I'm home, but it doesn't really feel like home. 207 00:12:29,215 --> 00:12:31,274 It will. Give it time. 208 00:12:31,917 --> 00:12:34,977 The important thing is that you're back from the hospital. 209 00:12:35,054 --> 00:12:37,045 And every day you're getting better. 210 00:12:37,656 --> 00:12:40,853 Hey, the worst's behind you. 211 00:12:46,165 --> 00:12:47,962 I need the Delfino search warrant. 212 00:12:48,033 --> 00:12:50,126 Not gonna get it without probable cause. 213 00:12:50,202 --> 00:12:52,966 Guy's phone number was written on a dead girl's hand. 214 00:12:53,038 --> 00:12:56,098 - The judge is gonna need more. - Thought you might say that. 215 00:12:56,175 --> 00:12:58,234 Here's Monique Poulier's lab work. 216 00:12:58,310 --> 00:13:01,939 The infrared spectroscopy matched paint fragments in the head wound 217 00:13:02,014 --> 00:13:04,039 to the proximal line of pipe wrenches. 218 00:13:04,116 --> 00:13:07,483 They're high-end, only used by professional plumbers. 219 00:13:08,254 --> 00:13:11,121 And guess what our boy Delfino does for a living? 220 00:13:13,092 --> 00:13:14,491 I'll see what I can do. 221 00:13:17,530 --> 00:13:21,193 What do you mean you can't shoot her? If you can airbrush her acne, 222 00:13:21,267 --> 00:13:23,098 you can airbrush the track marks. 223 00:13:23,169 --> 00:13:25,831 Now, don't call me again unless she OD's. 224 00:13:25,905 --> 00:13:28,931 - Gabrielle, ma petite fille. - [both air kiss] 225 00:13:29,875 --> 00:13:32,435 - Sit. - You look amazing. 226 00:13:32,511 --> 00:13:35,036 - Younger than ever. - It's my new derma filler. 227 00:13:35,114 --> 00:13:38,311 It's banned here, so my assistant smuggles it in from Brazil. 228 00:13:38,384 --> 00:13:41,080 Isn't it fun? I have my own drug mule. 229 00:13:41,153 --> 00:13:43,621 That's great. [chuckles] 230 00:13:43,689 --> 00:13:46,157 Well, I have some fun news of my own. 231 00:13:46,225 --> 00:13:49,388 - I'm ready to model again. - Really? Oh. 232 00:13:49,461 --> 00:13:52,157 The last time we spoke you couldn't wait to quit. 233 00:13:52,231 --> 00:13:56,065 You were giving it all up for love. What happened to Prince Charming? 234 00:13:57,503 --> 00:14:00,836 - Divorce. [chuckles] - Oh, single again. 235 00:14:00,906 --> 00:14:05,366 Isn't that ironic, since I'm the one you called... Oh, how did you put it? 236 00:14:05,444 --> 00:14:10,177 A career-obsessed lesbo who would die alone and be eaten by her cats. 237 00:14:10,249 --> 00:14:11,546 [chuckles] 238 00:14:11,617 --> 00:14:14,347 - Did I say that? - Water under the bridge. 239 00:14:14,420 --> 00:14:16,445 I thought it was funny. 240 00:14:16,522 --> 00:14:18,683 It's even funnier now. 241 00:14:19,625 --> 00:14:21,559 Look, Marcella, I'm back. 242 00:14:21,627 --> 00:14:25,063 And we made such a great team before. I think we can be again. 243 00:14:25,130 --> 00:14:27,155 I don't know. Things are different now. 244 00:14:27,233 --> 00:14:30,532 You're not gonna be able to jump back in where you left off. 245 00:14:30,603 --> 00:14:32,298 Well, I just want to work. 246 00:14:32,371 --> 00:14:35,067 Boy, I'm still not sure. 247 00:14:35,140 --> 00:14:36,732 You know what might help? 248 00:14:37,643 --> 00:14:41,704 - If you groveled. - Are you serious? 249 00:14:43,082 --> 00:14:45,983 I can't tell, because your face doesn't move anymore. 250 00:14:46,051 --> 00:14:49,578 No, I'm joking. Welcome back, darling. 251 00:14:56,295 --> 00:14:57,728 Hi. 252 00:15:01,000 --> 00:15:02,467 Thank you. 253 00:15:06,438 --> 00:15:08,406 Well, hello, there. 254 00:15:09,441 --> 00:15:11,432 How pretty you look today. 255 00:15:11,510 --> 00:15:13,944 It's wonderful that you're up and about. 256 00:15:14,013 --> 00:15:18,882 You must be enjoying these colorful balloons. [laughs] 257 00:15:21,654 --> 00:15:24,248 Why are you talking to me like I'm a moron? 258 00:15:25,958 --> 00:15:27,858 Oh! Oh, I'm so sorry. 259 00:15:27,927 --> 00:15:31,522 The nurse pointed me over here. I'm looking for Gloria Hodge. 260 00:15:31,597 --> 00:15:33,792 I'm Gloria Hodge. 261 00:15:33,866 --> 00:15:36,232 Who might you be? 262 00:15:39,638 --> 00:15:42,505 I must say, I'm surprised at how lucid you are. 263 00:15:42,574 --> 00:15:44,474 Orson led me to believe... 264 00:15:44,543 --> 00:15:46,773 That I was in the final stages of dementia. No. 265 00:15:46,845 --> 00:15:49,746 I'm afraid that's just wishful thinking on his part. 266 00:15:49,815 --> 00:15:52,716 Well, how can he feel that way? You're his mother. 267 00:15:52,785 --> 00:15:55,845 I wouldn't judge him too harshly. Ours is a... 268 00:15:55,921 --> 00:15:58,549 ...complicated relationship. 269 00:15:58,624 --> 00:16:02,924 There is love, to be sure, but we have a way of disappointing each other. 270 00:16:03,829 --> 00:16:06,730 Well, how does he disappoint you? 271 00:16:06,799 --> 00:16:09,927 He's cold, rigid, 272 00:16:10,002 --> 00:16:14,496 and... and utterly incapable of letting go of the past. 273 00:16:14,573 --> 00:16:17,406 And how do you disappoint him? 274 00:16:17,476 --> 00:16:19,410 I refuse to die. 275 00:16:19,478 --> 00:16:21,469 [both chuckle] 276 00:16:21,547 --> 00:16:22,707 Yes, I see. 277 00:16:22,781 --> 00:16:25,875 Well, surely this rift isn't irreparable. 278 00:16:27,519 --> 00:16:31,717 Do you know how people in nursing homes spend their days, Bree? 279 00:16:32,458 --> 00:16:34,517 They think about the past. 280 00:16:34,593 --> 00:16:38,154 And all the things they'd do differently if they had the chance. 281 00:16:39,331 --> 00:16:42,323 Please tell Orson that I'm sorry. 282 00:16:42,401 --> 00:16:45,427 And in spite of everything, I still love him. 283 00:16:47,706 --> 00:16:50,800 Well, I have a better idea. Why don't you tell him yourself? 284 00:16:58,384 --> 00:17:01,046 That would be great. I really appreciate it. 285 00:17:02,021 --> 00:17:03,420 OK. Thank you. 286 00:17:04,123 --> 00:17:06,455 What did Ed say? When do you go back to work? 287 00:17:06,525 --> 00:17:09,016 He said take as much time as I want with pay. 288 00:17:09,094 --> 00:17:12,291 - [woman] How was your day? - You should get gunned down more often. 289 00:17:13,866 --> 00:17:16,391 - Hey, there they are. - Hey, guys. 290 00:17:16,468 --> 00:17:18,595 - Hello. - How was school? Doing well? 291 00:17:19,938 --> 00:17:21,872 Mommy, were you shot? 292 00:17:22,574 --> 00:17:24,542 Shot? Where did you hear that? 293 00:17:24,610 --> 00:17:26,669 Jordan Blackwelder. 294 00:17:26,745 --> 00:17:30,340 Oh... The same creep who tried to ruin Santa Claus. 295 00:17:30,416 --> 00:17:33,385 And he said the same crazy lady that shot you, 296 00:17:33,452 --> 00:17:37,047 killed Auntie Nora dead. It was on the news and everything. 297 00:17:37,756 --> 00:17:41,021 Listen, kids. I am sorry. We shouldn't have lied. 298 00:17:41,093 --> 00:17:44,494 But sometimes parents want to protect kids from scary things. 299 00:17:44,563 --> 00:17:48,158 And, look, the good news is, Mommy's fine now. 300 00:17:48,233 --> 00:17:52,033 And we'll all see Auntie Nora again in heaven. 301 00:17:54,139 --> 00:17:55,606 Or wherever. 302 00:17:55,674 --> 00:17:58,939 - Did they let you keep the bullet? - No. I'm afraid not. 303 00:17:59,011 --> 00:18:02,105 That blows. We wanted to bring it for show and tell. 304 00:18:08,053 --> 00:18:09,384 Hey, sweetheart, you OK? 305 00:18:10,022 --> 00:18:12,456 What if the crazy lady comes back? 306 00:18:14,860 --> 00:18:17,090 She won't. 307 00:18:17,162 --> 00:18:20,359 - How do you know? - Well, 308 00:18:20,432 --> 00:18:24,960 because she's up in heaven with Auntie Nora. 309 00:18:25,037 --> 00:18:26,561 Or wherever. 310 00:18:29,341 --> 00:18:31,536 [engine revs, idling] 311 00:18:36,682 --> 00:18:39,480 Julie Mayer, you get back here! 312 00:18:39,551 --> 00:18:42,019 You're grounded, remember? 313 00:18:42,588 --> 00:18:43,987 [groans] 314 00:18:47,993 --> 00:18:51,258 - Edie Britt, I want to talk to you. - [groans] 315 00:18:51,964 --> 00:18:56,094 I just survived a hostage situation. Haven't I suffered enough for one week? 316 00:18:56,168 --> 00:18:59,160 You keep your nephew away from my daughter or else. 317 00:18:59,238 --> 00:19:01,069 Look, I don't like it, either. 318 00:19:01,140 --> 00:19:05,304 But the harder we try to keep them apart the more they'll fight to be together. 319 00:19:05,377 --> 00:19:09,177 - Just let it run its course. - Are you crazy? 320 00:19:09,248 --> 00:19:12,775 If we don't do something those two could end up having sex! 321 00:19:12,851 --> 00:19:15,285 - Could? - Oh, my God. 322 00:19:16,421 --> 00:19:18,480 - You don't... - Let me put it this way. 323 00:19:18,557 --> 00:19:20,991 I've got a box of condoms in my dresser. 324 00:19:21,059 --> 00:19:24,119 Eleven are gone. I can only account for eight of them. 325 00:19:25,564 --> 00:19:27,828 - How can you be so calm about this? - [door opens] 326 00:19:27,900 --> 00:19:30,368 - [Mike] Edie? - Yeah. 327 00:19:30,435 --> 00:19:32,699 Can you help me with this tie? 328 00:19:35,407 --> 00:19:37,034 Oh. 329 00:19:37,109 --> 00:19:39,669 - Hey. - Mike. 330 00:19:39,745 --> 00:19:42,373 - You're out of the hospital. - [Edie] Yeah. 331 00:19:42,447 --> 00:19:46,076 He's home. In fact, we're gonna go out and celebrate tonight. 332 00:19:47,653 --> 00:19:49,712 I'll be with you in one sec, OK, babe? 333 00:19:54,393 --> 00:19:56,156 Since you asked, 334 00:19:56,228 --> 00:19:59,561 I'm calm because I know if two people are meant to be together, 335 00:19:59,631 --> 00:20:01,826 there's nothing anyone can do about it. 336 00:20:07,940 --> 00:20:10,238 OK. I should be back at around 6:00. 337 00:20:10,309 --> 00:20:12,641 They can have one snack. Try and push apples. 338 00:20:12,711 --> 00:20:16,647 But if they threaten violence, I have an emergency candy bar under the sink. 339 00:20:16,715 --> 00:20:19,343 - Not anymore, you don't. - Oh, jeez. 340 00:20:20,919 --> 00:20:23,012 Mommy, where are you going? 341 00:20:23,088 --> 00:20:24,953 - To the market. - No. 342 00:20:25,657 --> 00:20:28,148 Hey, sweetie, it's a different market. 343 00:20:28,227 --> 00:20:30,457 - You're gonna get shot again. - No, I won't. 344 00:20:30,529 --> 00:20:33,555 Lots of mommies go to the store every day and they're fine. 345 00:20:33,632 --> 00:20:37,295 - It's really not a scary place. - You went to the store and got shot. 346 00:20:37,369 --> 00:20:40,361 And Auntie Nora died. 347 00:20:43,942 --> 00:20:46,911 I'm only gonna be in there ten minutes. I promise. 348 00:20:46,979 --> 00:20:49,072 Can't she go? 349 00:20:51,450 --> 00:20:52,678 Fine, I'll go. 350 00:20:53,252 --> 00:20:54,480 Thanks. 351 00:20:55,587 --> 00:20:58,215 You don't give a hoot if I get shot, do you, kid? 352 00:21:00,058 --> 00:21:02,458 [door opens and closes] 353 00:21:03,462 --> 00:21:06,090 [indistinct chatter] 354 00:21:07,933 --> 00:21:09,594 Oh! 355 00:21:15,040 --> 00:21:17,508 You must be Tanya. I'm Gabrielle. 356 00:21:17,576 --> 00:21:19,510 We're gonna be co-models today. 357 00:21:21,046 --> 00:21:24,812 Now, I don't know if you've ever done one of these big shoots before, 358 00:21:24,883 --> 00:21:28,319 but don't be nervous. Dirkin and I are old friends. 359 00:21:28,387 --> 00:21:32,084 He's a sweetheart. Now, just remember, he's the king. 360 00:21:32,157 --> 00:21:35,092 Do exactly what he says and you'll be fine. 361 00:21:37,162 --> 00:21:38,925 I've been modeling for two years. 362 00:21:38,997 --> 00:21:42,626 I've done six magazine covers, and I'm sleeping with Dirkin. 363 00:21:45,437 --> 00:21:47,064 I guess you're all set, then. 364 00:21:48,607 --> 00:21:51,440 You've got some wardrobe choices. 365 00:21:52,210 --> 00:21:55,702 Hey. [gasps] Wow! 366 00:21:55,781 --> 00:21:57,476 Oh! 367 00:21:57,549 --> 00:22:00,518 I want to be buried in this dress. 368 00:22:00,585 --> 00:22:04,180 This is for Tanya. The mom's stuff is at the end. 369 00:22:05,624 --> 00:22:06,784 Mom? 370 00:22:08,460 --> 00:22:10,758 [man] OK, love, let's get the blood pumping! 371 00:22:10,829 --> 00:22:13,127 The concept is "lock up your daughters." 372 00:22:13,198 --> 00:22:15,462 OK, get to work, everybody. 373 00:22:15,534 --> 00:22:18,970 Tanya, I want you to hover down here on the lawn, 374 00:22:19,037 --> 00:22:22,029 looking absolutely delicious. Thank you very much. 375 00:22:22,107 --> 00:22:26,168 And up here on the porch, Mom and Dad looking all scandalized. 376 00:22:26,244 --> 00:22:28,303 - Excuse me, Dirkin? - Yes, love? 377 00:22:28,380 --> 00:22:30,314 It's Gabby. [chuckling] 378 00:22:32,250 --> 00:22:34,980 Gabrielle Marquez. You shot me in Milan, remember? 379 00:22:36,088 --> 00:22:40,684 Yes. Yes! Lovely to see you again. Did you have a question, then? 380 00:22:40,759 --> 00:22:42,351 I do. Um... 381 00:22:43,929 --> 00:22:47,262 Aren't you a little worried that I'm gonna pull focus? 382 00:22:47,332 --> 00:22:49,095 I mean, it's a little confusing. 383 00:22:49,167 --> 00:22:53,570 People are gonna see Tanya, then they're gonna see that guy. 384 00:22:53,638 --> 00:22:55,435 And they're gonna wonder who I am. 385 00:22:56,775 --> 00:22:59,539 - You're the Mom. - Yeah... Ha! 386 00:22:59,611 --> 00:23:02,774 People aren't gonna buy that. Here's what I was thinking. 387 00:23:02,848 --> 00:23:04,873 I slap on one of those gowns. 388 00:23:04,950 --> 00:23:10,855 I play Tanya's big sister, home from college to raise a little hell. 389 00:23:10,922 --> 00:23:13,720 And we're gonna cram all that on a subtitle, are we? 390 00:23:13,792 --> 00:23:16,727 I'm sorry. It's just this outfit is hideous. 391 00:23:16,795 --> 00:23:18,285 Just make it work. 392 00:23:20,465 --> 00:23:23,298 Fine. I just need a moment to get into character. 393 00:23:28,073 --> 00:23:31,304 Gabrielle, what's the hold up? We've got to get moving here. 394 00:23:32,310 --> 00:23:33,971 Ready, ready. 395 00:23:36,848 --> 00:23:39,510 - What's that? - Oh, I made it work. 396 00:23:39,584 --> 00:23:41,074 I'm hot mom. 397 00:23:45,490 --> 00:23:47,048 Get me her agent. 398 00:23:51,696 --> 00:23:56,360 Before we begin, would either of you like some cookies, milk, lemonade? 399 00:23:56,435 --> 00:23:58,403 Mom, why are we here? 400 00:23:58,470 --> 00:24:01,769 Ah. Cutting to the chase. I like it. 401 00:24:01,840 --> 00:24:03,398 [car approaching] 402 00:24:06,645 --> 00:24:08,135 I have a confession to make. 403 00:24:08,213 --> 00:24:11,046 This whole dating drama has been keeping me up at night. 404 00:24:11,116 --> 00:24:13,084 And I hate being the bitchy, naggy mom. 405 00:24:13,151 --> 00:24:17,053 When it comes to parenting, I am much more comfortable playing the good cop. 406 00:24:17,122 --> 00:24:19,249 You see where I'm going with this, kids? 407 00:24:20,025 --> 00:24:21,424 No. 408 00:24:21,493 --> 00:24:23,393 Oh. Well, in that case... 409 00:24:24,329 --> 00:24:25,887 ...meet the bad cop. 410 00:24:25,964 --> 00:24:27,625 [door opens] 411 00:24:28,667 --> 00:24:30,567 - Daddy. - Hi, baby girl. 412 00:24:31,369 --> 00:24:33,462 - Is that the guy? - Yep. 413 00:24:34,306 --> 00:24:36,137 Get him. 414 00:24:41,379 --> 00:24:42,607 This is so unfair. 415 00:24:42,681 --> 00:24:45,081 Look, you defied my wishes, you broke my rules. 416 00:24:45,150 --> 00:24:47,744 Did you think I was just gonna throw in the towel? 417 00:24:47,819 --> 00:24:49,810 Face it. I outsmarted you. 418 00:24:50,489 --> 00:24:53,686 - [groans] - [sighs] 419 00:24:58,129 --> 00:25:00,029 - Who's Ian? - What? 420 00:25:00,098 --> 00:25:02,760 You're dating some British guy named Ian. 421 00:25:02,834 --> 00:25:04,165 How did that come up? 422 00:25:04,236 --> 00:25:06,966 I'm sorry. I didn't realize it was a big secret. 423 00:25:07,038 --> 00:25:10,633 You know, when you said it was true love with you and the plumber, 424 00:25:10,709 --> 00:25:14,770 I was a good guy. I stepped aside. And now you're on to someone else. 425 00:25:14,846 --> 00:25:18,509 Big picture, Karl. His hand up our daughter's shirt. 426 00:25:18,583 --> 00:25:21,609 - Don't change the subject. - That is the subject. 427 00:25:21,686 --> 00:25:26,385 - How serious is it with this Ian guy? - I don't know. It's complicated. 428 00:25:26,458 --> 00:25:27,925 Yeah, he's kind of married. 429 00:25:29,594 --> 00:25:32,392 - He's what? - It's not what you think. 430 00:25:32,464 --> 00:25:35,433 Uh... In her defense, his wife is in a coma. 431 00:25:36,768 --> 00:25:39,828 All right, that's it. I forbid you to see this guy. 432 00:25:39,905 --> 00:25:43,136 What? No. I don't take orders from you. 433 00:25:43,208 --> 00:25:46,473 Mom has a point. You can't tell a woman who she can and can't date. 434 00:25:46,545 --> 00:25:49,070 - It's her choice. - Exactly. Thank you. Wait, no. 435 00:25:49,147 --> 00:25:50,876 That does not apply to you. 436 00:25:50,949 --> 00:25:53,383 You know, if you don't care about my feelings, 437 00:25:53,451 --> 00:25:56,579 - I don't know what I'm doing here. - Your feelings? My God. 438 00:25:56,655 --> 00:25:58,850 You are the worst bad cop ever. 439 00:25:58,924 --> 00:26:00,585 - [door slams] - [groans] 440 00:26:01,826 --> 00:26:03,919 Go to your room. 441 00:26:06,398 --> 00:26:07,888 Not you. 442 00:26:13,505 --> 00:26:16,906 - Get back, you're under arrest. - No, I'm not. Aah! 443 00:26:17,609 --> 00:26:20,009 You've been reading comic books for awhile. 444 00:26:20,078 --> 00:26:21,841 Don't you want to go and play? 445 00:26:22,547 --> 00:26:25,914 - No. I want to stay with you. - Yeah? 446 00:26:26,685 --> 00:26:27,913 OK. 447 00:26:36,094 --> 00:26:39,359 - [drill whirring] - Hey, Art. 448 00:26:40,398 --> 00:26:42,195 - Oh, hey. How are you? - Good. 449 00:26:42,267 --> 00:26:47,261 Um, listen, as if saving my life wasn't enough, I have a little favor to ask. 450 00:26:47,339 --> 00:26:50,274 - Sure. What's up? - My kids are having a hard time. 451 00:26:50,342 --> 00:26:53,243 They're freaked out by that whole supermarket thing. 452 00:26:53,311 --> 00:26:56,712 You're my hostage. Keep moving or I'll blow your face off. 453 00:26:56,781 --> 00:26:58,942 OK, it's my turn. Give me the gun. 454 00:26:59,017 --> 00:27:00,848 - Not so much them. - Right. 455 00:27:01,353 --> 00:27:04,288 But my other son, Parker. 456 00:27:04,356 --> 00:27:07,325 So... back to the favor. 457 00:27:10,962 --> 00:27:12,793 Hey, Parker. 458 00:27:12,864 --> 00:27:17,392 I want you to meet our new neighbor Art. He lives in the house across the street. 459 00:27:17,469 --> 00:27:20,563 His sister has the cool wheelchair with the joystick. 460 00:27:20,639 --> 00:27:22,334 - Hey, there, Parker. - Hi. 461 00:27:26,645 --> 00:27:30,672 In the daytime Art coaches swimming at the rec center. 462 00:27:30,749 --> 00:27:34,845 But... Please, can I tell Parker? Please? 463 00:27:34,919 --> 00:27:39,015 And compromise my secret identity? No way, Mrs. Scavo. No way. 464 00:27:40,392 --> 00:27:44,192 - Secret identity? - Oh, great. 465 00:27:44,262 --> 00:27:47,026 Now the cat's out of the bag. We might as well tell him. 466 00:27:47,599 --> 00:27:51,194 It's OK. You can trust him, really. 467 00:27:51,269 --> 00:27:55,365 Art is the one who saved me at the supermarket. 468 00:27:55,440 --> 00:27:57,738 He's sort of a superhero. 469 00:28:01,546 --> 00:28:02,979 Give me a break. 470 00:28:05,316 --> 00:28:07,079 It's true. 471 00:28:08,987 --> 00:28:12,388 All right. If you're a superhero, what's your name? 472 00:28:12,457 --> 00:28:14,288 I'm... 473 00:28:14,926 --> 00:28:16,917 ...Protector Man. 474 00:28:17,429 --> 00:28:19,989 Because I protect people from bad guys. 475 00:28:22,801 --> 00:28:24,735 Hmm. 476 00:28:24,803 --> 00:28:26,828 You don't believe me, do you? 477 00:28:27,872 --> 00:28:29,339 OK. 478 00:28:30,308 --> 00:28:32,538 I really shouldn't do this, but... 479 00:28:34,245 --> 00:28:38,682 - [gasps] - Wow. Did you really save my mom? 480 00:28:39,751 --> 00:28:41,343 I really did. 481 00:28:42,487 --> 00:28:43,715 He really did. 482 00:28:45,223 --> 00:28:48,784 That's why you don't have to worry. That's Protector Man's job. 483 00:28:48,860 --> 00:28:52,352 Your job is to run and play and have fun. 484 00:28:53,298 --> 00:28:55,061 OK? 485 00:28:57,202 --> 00:28:58,533 OK. 486 00:28:59,270 --> 00:29:00,464 OK. 487 00:29:07,045 --> 00:29:09,377 Oh. My cousin went to Purdue. 488 00:29:21,326 --> 00:29:22,554 [police radio chatter] 489 00:29:22,627 --> 00:29:23,958 What the hell? 490 00:29:25,597 --> 00:29:26,791 Delfino. 491 00:29:27,632 --> 00:29:29,224 Nice to see you up and about. 492 00:29:30,869 --> 00:29:34,168 - Here's our search warrant. - Search warrant? Let me see that. 493 00:29:40,311 --> 00:29:41,573 How are we doing? 494 00:29:41,646 --> 00:29:43,910 We couldn't find the toolbox. 495 00:29:43,982 --> 00:29:46,746 The man's a plumber. Keep looking. 496 00:29:47,886 --> 00:29:50,320 - Sir, I can't find the thing. - You tried... 497 00:29:53,158 --> 00:29:55,490 [man] Let's go. Let's get it back to one. 498 00:29:57,428 --> 00:30:00,363 - You come with me. - Marcella! 499 00:30:00,431 --> 00:30:04,299 I don't know what they told you, but all I'm asking for is a costume change. 500 00:30:04,369 --> 00:30:05,996 You don't get to pull diva crap. 501 00:30:06,070 --> 00:30:09,335 Tanya gets away with it because she's a star. You are nothing. 502 00:30:09,407 --> 00:30:11,739 Where do you get off talking to me like that? 503 00:30:11,810 --> 00:30:14,438 I shot 36 covers by the time I was 20. 504 00:30:14,512 --> 00:30:15,706 Well, you're 30 now. 505 00:30:17,048 --> 00:30:19,243 When you make that face you look 35. 506 00:30:19,317 --> 00:30:23,515 Do you know how many photographers would die to work with me again? 507 00:30:23,588 --> 00:30:24,816 Yeah. Zero. 508 00:30:24,889 --> 00:30:27,619 I had to call in major favors just to get you this job. 509 00:30:27,692 --> 00:30:30,252 - I don't believe that. - Know what I don't believe? 510 00:30:30,328 --> 00:30:33,422 You gave up a brilliant career to play house in the suburbs. 511 00:30:33,498 --> 00:30:37,332 The minute it falls apart you come back expecting a homecoming parade. 512 00:30:37,402 --> 00:30:39,870 Well, guess what, sweetie? We've moved on. 513 00:30:41,272 --> 00:30:46,471 Now, get your polyester ass over there and act like the pro you used to be. 514 00:30:51,950 --> 00:30:54,384 [Dirkin] Beautiful, Tanya. That's it, chin up. 515 00:30:54,452 --> 00:30:57,615 Fantastic. Mother, hold the plate higher. 516 00:31:01,893 --> 00:31:04,726 Beautiful, Tanya. Oh, you are gorgeous! 517 00:31:04,796 --> 00:31:06,661 Yes, girl. Lovely, lovely! 518 00:31:06,731 --> 00:31:08,062 [doorbell ringing] 519 00:31:09,667 --> 00:31:11,897 Hi, Mike. Welcome home. You remember me? 520 00:31:11,970 --> 00:31:13,437 Yeah, I think so. 521 00:31:13,504 --> 00:31:16,769 The corner house with all the gnomes out front? 522 00:31:16,841 --> 00:31:19,605 You're thinking of Martha Huber. Terrible story. 523 00:31:19,677 --> 00:31:22,908 Someone beat her to death and then buried her in the forest. 524 00:31:22,981 --> 00:31:25,575 Ironic, huh? Isn't that where gnomes live? 525 00:31:26,150 --> 00:31:28,846 I don't really know that much about gnomes. 526 00:31:28,920 --> 00:31:31,252 Anyway, I know the cops were here earlier. 527 00:31:31,322 --> 00:31:32,880 So? 528 00:31:32,957 --> 00:31:36,154 Well, you won't remember this, but one night, two years ago, 529 00:31:36,227 --> 00:31:39,458 you drove me to the hospital after I had an attack of angina. 530 00:31:39,530 --> 00:31:41,498 Probably saved my life. 531 00:31:41,566 --> 00:31:43,966 Anyway, I figure I owe you. Here. 532 00:31:45,069 --> 00:31:47,503 You might want to wash that wrench off. 533 00:31:47,572 --> 00:31:49,972 It's got something on it. 534 00:31:55,146 --> 00:31:58,604 Sorry I'm late. Mrs. Prescott broke a crown... 535 00:32:01,085 --> 00:32:03,645 Orson, how well you look. 536 00:32:05,123 --> 00:32:06,784 Hello, Mother. 537 00:32:07,625 --> 00:32:09,286 A word, darling. 538 00:32:15,099 --> 00:32:16,623 I can't believe you did this! 539 00:32:17,468 --> 00:32:20,699 I can't believe you told me that she was senile! You lied to me. 540 00:32:20,772 --> 00:32:22,967 Yes, to spare us the misery of her company. 541 00:32:23,041 --> 00:32:25,669 You don't know her, Bree. She's a loathsome woman. 542 00:32:25,743 --> 00:32:28,712 - I refuse to break bread with her. - Now you listen to me. 543 00:32:28,780 --> 00:32:30,304 That woman gave you life. 544 00:32:30,381 --> 00:32:33,145 The Fifth Commandment tells us to honor our parents, 545 00:32:33,217 --> 00:32:35,651 no matter how hideous or repellent they may be. 546 00:32:35,720 --> 00:32:38,348 - That's not exactly... - Orson, it's implied! 547 00:32:38,423 --> 00:32:41,119 Now, get out there and show her some respect. 548 00:32:41,192 --> 00:32:44,753 Fine, but if you expect anything more from me than forced civility, 549 00:32:44,829 --> 00:32:46,626 you will be deeply disappointed. 550 00:32:52,136 --> 00:32:55,401 - Bree, the salmon is superb. - Well, thank you. 551 00:32:55,473 --> 00:32:58,670 It did win me the blue ribbon at the Gourmet County Cook-off. 552 00:32:58,743 --> 00:33:01,337 I just love the sauce. What gives it that kick? 553 00:33:01,412 --> 00:33:05,405 Uh-uh-uh! You'd never ask a magician how a trick is done. 554 00:33:07,352 --> 00:33:09,912 You've barely touched your salmon, dear. 555 00:33:10,722 --> 00:33:14,089 - Is everything OK? - Yes. 556 00:33:14,559 --> 00:33:16,550 I was just wondering why you're here. 557 00:33:18,763 --> 00:33:21,425 - I want us to be friends. - OK. 558 00:33:22,133 --> 00:33:25,432 Let's suppose I just had a massive head injury and believe you. 559 00:33:25,503 --> 00:33:28,267 - We're pals. What do you want? - Orson. Why does she 560 00:33:28,339 --> 00:33:30,034 have to have an ulterior motive? 561 00:33:33,044 --> 00:33:36,775 - I want out of that home. - Ah, there it is. 562 00:33:36,848 --> 00:33:40,079 It's a hellhole. Besides, I'm perfectly healthy now. 563 00:33:40,151 --> 00:33:42,381 My hip is better. I can handle the stairs. 564 00:33:42,453 --> 00:33:46,514 And you said when I got strong enough I'd get to go back to my house. 565 00:33:46,591 --> 00:33:48,422 Oh, here's the thing. 566 00:33:48,493 --> 00:33:51,519 - I sold it. - What? 567 00:33:53,131 --> 00:33:54,155 You heard me. 568 00:33:55,700 --> 00:34:00,399 - What about my things? - All gone. I also sold the car. 569 00:34:00,471 --> 00:34:04,066 That's the thing about hellholes. They don't pay for themselves. 570 00:34:04,142 --> 00:34:07,236 How dare you! You had no right! 571 00:34:07,311 --> 00:34:10,712 OK. Maybe I will share my secret ingredient. 572 00:34:10,782 --> 00:34:14,479 I should have smothered you in your crib when I had the chance. 573 00:34:14,552 --> 00:34:17,077 Paprika! There, it's out. 574 00:34:17,155 --> 00:34:19,350 That's the mother I remember. 575 00:34:20,091 --> 00:34:22,252 I was wondering when she'd show up. 576 00:34:23,161 --> 00:34:26,221 Yes, Orson, I am your mother. 577 00:34:26,297 --> 00:34:30,529 So you more than anyone should know how I deal with betrayal. 578 00:34:38,176 --> 00:34:41,703 So... can we call her Grandma? 579 00:34:52,390 --> 00:34:55,257 I've got one more load, then I'm gonna do my homework. 580 00:34:55,326 --> 00:34:57,624 You have anything you want me to throw in? 581 00:34:57,695 --> 00:34:59,185 No, I'm good, thanks. 582 00:35:05,002 --> 00:35:06,560 Mom, listen... 583 00:35:07,171 --> 00:35:11,164 I know I've put you through the wringer lately, and I'm sorry. 584 00:35:12,443 --> 00:35:15,674 Sixteen years of being perfect. You were due. 585 00:35:16,814 --> 00:35:18,805 That's what I don't get. 586 00:35:18,883 --> 00:35:20,874 You've always trusted my judgment. 587 00:35:21,619 --> 00:35:23,780 Why can't you trust me about Austin? 588 00:35:25,990 --> 00:35:29,517 Relationships have nothing to do with good judgment. 589 00:35:29,594 --> 00:35:33,860 It doesn't matter how smart you are. You can still get hurt. 590 00:35:35,800 --> 00:35:39,099 You do your homework. I'm gonna finish the laundry. 591 00:35:39,170 --> 00:35:40,603 OK. 592 00:35:56,988 --> 00:35:58,615 There you go, Mrs. H. 593 00:36:00,057 --> 00:36:01,251 All right. 594 00:36:03,094 --> 00:36:05,460 - Can I use your bathroom? - Come on in. 595 00:36:05,530 --> 00:36:06,622 Thank you. 596 00:36:08,900 --> 00:36:10,993 Please stay for dessert. 597 00:36:11,068 --> 00:36:13,764 I'll work on Orson and we'll discuss this together. 598 00:36:13,838 --> 00:36:15,772 You saw what he sentenced me to. 599 00:36:15,840 --> 00:36:18,172 A room no better than a furnished coffin. 600 00:36:18,843 --> 00:36:21,903 - I have nothing to say to him. - Well, then talk to me. 601 00:36:21,979 --> 00:36:25,142 I know you're upset, but don't shut me out, please. 602 00:36:25,216 --> 00:36:28,310 Please, Gloria, let me in. 603 00:36:30,354 --> 00:36:33,323 Well, I didn't mean it literally, but OK. 604 00:36:34,492 --> 00:36:38,360 We'II, um, sit together and we'll talk. What are you doing? 605 00:36:38,429 --> 00:36:40,897 - I'm not going back to that place! - [Bree screams] 606 00:36:40,965 --> 00:36:42,489 Gloria, stop! 607 00:36:43,668 --> 00:36:46,102 Let's get my mother back to the home, shall we? 608 00:36:46,170 --> 00:36:49,833 Not that it's any of my business, but is everything OK with you folks? 609 00:36:49,907 --> 00:36:53,673 Oh, yeah. There was a little tension earlier, but it's all been resolved. 610 00:36:53,744 --> 00:36:55,234 [van crashing] 611 00:36:55,313 --> 00:36:58,043 [water spraying] 612 00:36:58,115 --> 00:37:01,881 [groaning] What the hell? 613 00:37:07,425 --> 00:37:09,825 [Orson] No. I absolutely forbid it. 614 00:37:09,894 --> 00:37:13,887 [Bree] Just for a few weeks till we find a place where she'll be happier. 615 00:37:13,965 --> 00:37:18,197 You should have heard her in the car. She's miserable in that nursing home. 616 00:37:18,269 --> 00:37:20,533 I don't care. My mother's not moving in here 617 00:37:20,605 --> 00:37:22,436 till she fits in a jar on the mantle. 618 00:37:22,506 --> 00:37:24,770 How can you be so cold? 619 00:37:25,343 --> 00:37:27,140 You don't know who she is. 620 00:37:27,778 --> 00:37:30,611 I've worked my entire life to get away from that woman. 621 00:37:30,681 --> 00:37:34,617 Why? What could she have possibly done to make you hate her so much? 622 00:37:36,287 --> 00:37:39,381 Look, there is nothing to be gained by dredging up the past. 623 00:37:39,457 --> 00:37:42,688 Orson, if there's something I should know... 624 00:37:44,462 --> 00:37:46,487 Could I speak to my son a moment? 625 00:37:49,900 --> 00:37:51,390 Of course. 626 00:37:54,839 --> 00:37:56,033 [Orson clears throat] 627 00:37:56,107 --> 00:38:00,874 So you know, I've decided to accept your wife's kind invitation. 628 00:38:02,780 --> 00:38:05,806 - I won't allow it. - Oh, I think you will. 629 00:38:05,883 --> 00:38:08,283 We're going to end our quarrel right now. 630 00:38:09,053 --> 00:38:12,079 Or I'll tell your wife what it's about. 631 00:38:13,190 --> 00:38:15,920 - You wouldn't. - Just try me. 632 00:38:16,761 --> 00:38:18,353 I gave you life. 633 00:38:19,130 --> 00:38:22,156 You know I won't hesitate to take it away. 634 00:38:30,975 --> 00:38:32,966 Now, give Mother a kiss. 635 00:38:33,044 --> 00:38:35,706 Why in the hell would I want to do that? 636 00:38:36,847 --> 00:38:39,213 To make it look real. 637 00:38:59,603 --> 00:39:01,468 [Susan] Hey! You're back! 638 00:39:01,539 --> 00:39:04,030 - Oh! - I'd give you a hug, but I'm sweaty. 639 00:39:04,108 --> 00:39:05,700 - How was New York? - It was fine. 640 00:39:05,776 --> 00:39:08,745 Bree said you got a job on the first day. You're such a star. 641 00:39:08,813 --> 00:39:10,007 - I want details. - Oh! 642 00:39:11,082 --> 00:39:15,178 You know, just hours and hours of sitting around looking pretty. 643 00:39:15,252 --> 00:39:17,083 But I think I'm done with modeling. 644 00:39:17,655 --> 00:39:19,452 You're not gonna move to New York? 645 00:39:19,523 --> 00:39:22,549 Well, if something great comes up, I might fly out, 646 00:39:22,626 --> 00:39:24,890 but I'm pretty settled here. 647 00:39:24,962 --> 00:39:27,954 Oh, thank God. We were all so worried we were losing you. 648 00:39:28,032 --> 00:39:30,023 OK. Now I'm hugging you. 649 00:39:30,101 --> 00:39:31,830 [sighing] 650 00:39:32,937 --> 00:39:35,804 Oh! It's amazing. Your life is such an adventure. 651 00:39:35,873 --> 00:39:38,637 - I can't wait to see what you do next. - [chuckles] 652 00:39:39,377 --> 00:39:41,072 Yeah. Me, too. 653 00:39:47,885 --> 00:39:49,113 OK. 654 00:39:52,656 --> 00:39:54,146 Huh. 655 00:39:56,660 --> 00:39:59,424 - Mr. Protector Man? - [whispers] Shh! That's a secret. 656 00:39:59,497 --> 00:40:00,964 Hello? 657 00:40:01,766 --> 00:40:03,165 Hello? 658 00:40:06,937 --> 00:40:09,565 - Ah, sweet. - [steam whistle blows] 659 00:40:12,643 --> 00:40:14,008 Mom, look. 660 00:40:14,078 --> 00:40:17,206 Hey, don't touch anything. I'm just gonna write a note. 661 00:40:17,815 --> 00:40:21,307 Then we'll go. OK. 662 00:40:23,654 --> 00:40:25,019 Parker? 663 00:40:25,089 --> 00:40:28,252 Hey, come back here. 664 00:40:29,727 --> 00:40:31,957 Honey? Come on, we're leaving. 665 00:40:33,531 --> 00:40:34,657 Parker! 666 00:40:35,900 --> 00:40:38,630 - Parker, come on, we're leaving. - [pinball bells ring] 667 00:40:38,702 --> 00:40:41,193 Why didn't you come when I called? 668 00:40:46,544 --> 00:40:48,671 Superhero houses are great! 669 00:41:25,115 --> 00:41:27,743 Parker, come on. We're gonna get out of here. 670 00:41:27,818 --> 00:41:29,683 - Why? - I just said so. Come on. 671 00:41:36,093 --> 00:41:40,189 [Mary Alice] There are so many things we wish we could tell the young. 672 00:41:42,166 --> 00:41:45,932 We'd like to persuade them not to grow up so fast. 673 00:41:47,438 --> 00:41:49,167 But they won't listen. 674 00:41:50,474 --> 00:41:53,170 We want to tell them that beauty fades. 675 00:41:53,244 --> 00:41:55,576 [Dirkin] The look. Let's see the look, darling. 676 00:41:55,646 --> 00:41:57,671 But they refuse to believe it. 677 00:41:57,748 --> 00:41:59,215 [camera shutter clicking] 678 00:41:59,617 --> 00:42:03,383 We warn them that their actions will have consequences. 679 00:42:05,356 --> 00:42:07,654 But still, they defy us. 680 00:42:09,026 --> 00:42:12,086 Sadly, the young can't begin to understand 681 00:42:12,162 --> 00:42:14,528 the world is a dangerous place. 682 00:42:15,533 --> 00:42:19,993 So it's up to us to do anything we can to protect them. 683 00:42:20,070 --> 00:42:21,298 - [girl] Hi. - Hi. 684 00:42:21,372 --> 00:42:24,364 What if I told you there is a way you could help children... 685 00:42:25,242 --> 00:42:27,870 [Mary Alice] Absolutely anything.