So here's what's happened on Glee.
- Jesse left Vocal Adrenaline- - I'm a star. You can learn from me.
So he could date Rachel, so now he's part of the Glee Club.
- Great to have you here. - And they're the new power couple.
Previous power couples? Rachel and Finn.
- I made us his-and-her relationship calendars. - Oh.
- Also, Rachel and Puck. - You want to make out?
Sure.
Will still has a crush on Emma-
I could just lean over and kiss you if I want to, and I want to.
But he hasn't divorced Terri yet and he made out with the coach of Vocal Adrenaline.
Most of the show choir directors I make out with are gay.
- And Sue? - Sloppy freak show babies!
Still just kind of angry about everything.
- Who else wants a piece of this? - And that's what you missed on Glee.
[Laughing]
What's so funny?
You aren't watching the video of me falling off stage at my first Tiny Tots beauty pageant?
That was Carrot-Top funny compared to this comedic tour de force.
That's Olivia Newton-John's "Physical."
It was pretty groundbreaking subject matter at the time...
considering its depiction of fluid sexuality.
- [Mercedes Laughing] Oh, my G- - Wait, wait.
That's not Olivia Newton-John. That's-That's Sue Sylvester.
- Where did you get this? - I can tell you that I certainly did not steal it...
from her locked file cabinet yesterday when she sent me back to her office...
to get her hormone replacement injection during Cheerios practice.
- # Let's get physical # - Wait.
- Did she just do the Cabbage Patch? - [Mercedes Laughs]
- I'm posting this on YouTube. - No, no, wait, wait.
Do you think that's a good idea? She might kill us.
Oh, let her get a taste of some of the humiliation she put us through.
I'm with Finn. You guys need to stop being such asses and start being badasses.
Ten bucks it goes viral by lunch.
[Olivia Newton-John] # Let's get animal, animal #
Hey! Ms. Sylvester.
- Let's get physical. - Not really my type, but I like that attitude.
Hey, Sue! Let's get animal!
[School Bell Rings]
That Glee Club stole my private property and posted it online.
And as soon as I figure out the difference between slander and libel, I'm filing a lawsuit.
Sue, don't you think you might be overstating this a little?
Will, I may buy a small diaper for your chin, because it looks like a baby's ass.
That video has received over 170,000 comments.
I took the liberty of printing out a few.
"The man in this video looks like the champion cheerleading coach Sue Sylvester."
That was particularly hurtful.
You know, Sue, there are a lot of people in this school who dislike you.
- My kids don't do stuff like this. - Is that so?
Exhibit "B."
- What's a "Glist"? - It's a "Glee List," William.
It's a weekly ranking of your Glee Club, based on a hotness quotient of sexual promiscuity.
It was posted all over the school an hour ago.
Apparently, you get a point for each act of perpetuated depravity.
What makes you think my kids did this?
The Glist was made on a library computer using the pass code "gleeclub."
Your Glee Club is a petri dish of sexual depravity.
Sue's right, Will.
Why, only last year, a list was posted...
ranking McKinley's 10 ugliest gingers.
The perpetrator would have been expelled had it not turned out to be a member of the facultyl
- I stand by that list. - William, this is serious.
I cannot have an environment that sexualizes children and damages their self-esteem!
[Gasps]
A week ago, had I found a list that so degraded the Glee Club...
I would've been embarrassed I was beaten to the punch.
But now I know the white-hot shame of public rebuke.
That pain is indescribable.
William, last year at West Dayton High...
a photo circulated of a school superintendent-
- And what was he wearing? - Women's lingerie.
- And what was he riding? - Pony!
- And who was expelled? - The entire school!
- The entire school was expelled! - What does that have to do with me?
You must find out who made the Glist and suspend them before they post another one...
or I'm holding the entire Glee Club responsible!
- Are you serious? - Deadly serious!
I cannot have these shenanigans at this school!
He cannot have these shenanigans at this school!
Who did it?
This is serious. Principal Figgins is threatening to disband the club.
Why are we playing this game? We all know it was Puck.
Back off. I didn't do squat.
Then why is your girlfriend first on the Glist?
And why am I last? Aside from the fact that I refused to put out for you.
Okay, enough! No one is accusing anyone of anything.
- Puck, seriously, did you do it? - I said no.
I'm a delinquent, sure. I like setting stuff on fire and beating up people I don't know.
I own that. But I'm not a liar.
All right, here's the important point.
Between this and posting Coach Sylvester's personal video on YouTube...
you guys are getting a pretty bad reputation.
Why is that a bad thing?
Maybe if we seem more dangerous, people would stop flushing my glasses down the toilet.
Look, things are hard right now.
I get it. You're under a lot of pressure with regionals coming up.
I know that winning sectionals hasn't had the positive effect on your popularity...
that a lot of you thought it would.
But becoming what you despise is not the answer.
- Man, this song is wack. - No, it's not.
It's a terrific song on a long list of top hits...
that, because of time or some bad press, has become a joke.
And like you guys, it's time to start rehabilitating its bad reputation.
The assignment for the week is for all of you to find songs like this...
mine them for what works and make them great again...
and then, hopefully, you can apply this musical lesson to your own lives.
This song should be arrested for the crime of sucking.
- [Laughing] - You wanna bet?
- Ooh! - [Artie] Oh, no, he didn't.
- Hit it! - [Kids Laughing]
[Rapping] #Yo, V.I.P. #
♪ Let's kick it ♪
♪ Ice, ice, baby ♪
- #All right, stop Collaborate and listen # - Listen!
♪ Ice is back with a brand-new invention ♪
- Whoo! - # Something grabs ahold of me tightly #
♪ Flow like a harpoon daily and nightly ♪
♪Will it ever stop Yo, I don't know ♪
♪Turn off the lights, huh, and I'll glow ♪
♪To the extreme I rock a mike like a vandal ♪
♪ Light up a stage and wax a chump like a candle ♪
- Dance! - # Dance, go rush the speaker that booms #
♪ I'm killing your brain like a poisonous mushroom ♪
- Deadly! - #Deadly when I play a dope melody #
- Go, go, go! - #Anything less than the best is a felony #
♪ Love it or leave it You better gangway You better hit the bull's-eye ♪
♪The kid don't play If there was a problem, yo I'll solve it ♪
♪ Check out the hook while my deejay revolves it ♪
- # Ice, ice, baby # - Go!
- Oh! - #Vanilla Ice, ice, baby #
- Whoo! - Ha-ha!
♪Take heed 'cause I'm a lyrical poet ♪
♪ Miami's on the scene just in case you didn't know it ♪
♪ My town that created all the bass sound ♪
♪ Enough to shake and kick holes in the ground ♪
♪ 'Cause my style's like a chemical spill ♪
♪ Feasible rhymes you can vision and feel ♪
♪ Conducted and formed That's a hell of a concept ♪
♪We make it hype and you want to step with this ♪
♪ Shay plays on the fade Slice like a ninja, cut like a razor blade ♪
♪ So fast other deejays say, Damn ♪
♪ If my rhyme was a drug I'd sell it by the gram ♪
♪ Keep my composure when it's time to get loose ♪
♪ Magnetized by the mike while I kick my juice ♪
♪ If there was a problem yo, I'll solve it ♪
#Check out the hook while my deejay revolves it #
- # Ice, ice, baby # - Come on, come on, come on, come on!
# Vanilla Ice, ice, baby #
- Whoo! - #Vanilla Ice, ice, baby #
We got it.
♪Vanilla Ice, ice, baby Too cold, too cold ♪
♪Vanilla Ice, ice, baby Too cold, too cold ♪♪
♪Yo, man, let's get out of here Word to your mother ♪♪
- Oh! - This song is officially paroled!
- Right, Jesse? You got me? - Jesse could've done it better, but you did it really good.
[School Bell Rings]
[Thinking] This is not happening.
The cruel, slow-motion laughter is just your imagination.
You're Sue Sylvester, legend.
They're not laughing at you because of your "Physical" video.
Just calmly pour yourself a cup of joe and focus.
Wait. What's that smell?
Dear God! That's coffee.
It's usually masked by the smell of fear.
Sweet merciful Lord, this is happeningl
You're being laughed at in slow motion...
by a roomful of inferiors whom you used to terrify.
The name is Brenda. Brenda Castle.
I just transferred from Fort Wayne.
I can't teach in Indiana anymore 'cause I have some "drug problems"...
that ended up involving some of my "shudents."
I saw your video- [Laughing]
And you, my friend, are an embarrassment!
And that's me talking!
[School Bell Rings]
- I need to enlist the services of the A/V Club. - What did you have in mind?
My shame at appearing so low on the Glist...
has made me reevaluate my image at this school and beyond.
I've realized that in today's culture of bad boy athletes and celebrity sex tapes...
a good reputation is no good at all.
Artie, you know how our Glee Club assignment...
was to find a song with a bad reputation and rehabilitate it?
Well, mine is going to afford me the worst reputation in this school.
Rachel Berry is going to get a little down and dirty.
I'm gonna stop you. You had me at "sex tape." How can I help?
Hold on to your hat because Rachel Berry...
is going to become musically promiscuous.
- [School Bell Rings] - Fellow Glee Clubbers, I have called this meeting...
because our free-falling reps have reached terminal velocity.
- We are at DEFCON 1. - We're such zeros, they didn't bother putting us on the Glist.
What does a C-lister do when their tiny star...
is about to fall off Perez Hilton's radar screen?
They cause a scandal so extreme...
they can no longer be ignored.
Um, excuse me. Why is she here?
I've been here since first period.
I had a cold, and I took all my antibiotics at the same time...
and now I can't remember how to leave.
But I also don't know why I've only made fourth on the Glist.
I made out with, like, everyone in this school...
girls, boys, Mr. Kidney the janitor.
- I need to do something to get into the top three. - Fine, you're in.
In what? We don't even have a plan.
What is the worst thing a student can do at this school?
- Eat in the cafeteria? - [Snickers]
No, be a disruption in the library.
And I'm not talking about trying to check out a reference book.
Uh-uh. I'm talking about full-on chaos...
including getting your Glee on in the stacks.
Genius!
I never really understood how hard it is to be laughed at...
particularly in slow motion.
I try to make it seem like nothing can touch me, but, boy...
Jean, I'm so sorry you ever felt that way.
I'm sorry I didn't protect you more.
Remember what we used to do, Sue?
Whenever I got sad...
we'd help at the animal shelter to give back.
Because there's always someone who's got it worse than you do.
- [School Bell Rings] - I'm a little confused.
I understand.
You're probably wondering, what exactly does Sue Sylvester mean...
when she says, "I'm your new therapist"?
Well, let me explain.
As you may or may not know, I star in a little music video...
that's been circulating around the Web...
a video that has a tendency to induce cruel, slow-motion laughter.
No. No. Didn't- Didn't know about that.
Well, this video has inspired Sue Sylvester to start giving back.
I happen to have my master's in counseling...
and when I heard that our school district's one-and-only psychologist...
had committed suicide...
well, I decided to volunteer my services.
And they gave me your name. I'd really like to help.
I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Ella, you're crippled by mental illness.
Your compulsions have estranged you from your own feelings.
You nearly married a gym teacher who's more gravy than man...
and you're content to be repeatedly lied to by the man you purport to love.
- I'm sorry? - I bribed Will Schuester's landlord...
to slip baby monitors under his couch and under his bed.
Turns out he's been having make-out sessions with the coach from Vocal Adrenaline...
and sleepovers with that world-class banana magnet April Rhodes.
- Oh, my God. - You need to make a bold move.
- You suck. - Excuse me?
You take weird little strides when you walk...
as if you were raised in ImperialJapan and someone bound your feet.
- You make a valid point. - Grow a pair! I'm insulting you!
You refuse to stand up for yourself, you're so afraid of confrontation.
- You're right. - If you want to get better...
you need to start communicating your feelings.
You need to let Will Schuester know how he's made you feel, and in a public setting...
so he can't escape and he won't manipulate you.
Trust me-you need to let him have it.
Do you know that when we dated, the rest of the school gave us a nickname?
- Puckleberry. - That's humiliating.
The fact is that slumming it with me actually improved your reputation.
It gave you a sense of humanity.
Wait. Do you want to date again?
I was wondering why you invited me here.
As you know, I'm taken, but I can be of some assistance.
Help me with my song for Glee Club.
L-I might be the last chance you have...
to salvage what's left of your reputation and stay in Glee.
Besides, you need a song that's gonna help you to express your inner pain.
What song do you wanna do for your assignment?
I've chosen David Geddes's fantastically terrible '70s Top 10 hit, "Run Joey Run."
It's a story song, so we get to play parts.
I'm gonna play the role of the tragic heroine who dies in the end...
à la Nicole Kidman in Moulin Rougel
And you can be the hunky, heroic male lead.
- Do I get to kill you? - N-Actually, my dad shoots me with a shotgun.
[Sighs] Do you think I made that Glist? Honestly.
Well, it does sound like something that you would do.
God, I'm so tired of people judging me for a few mistakes I've made.
I try to be a good guy. I go to school and I say, "Be cool, Puck. Be nice."
But by second period, I've got a fire extinguisher in my hands...
and I'm spraying some dweeb with it, and I don't know how I got there.
I understand. Yeah.
I sit in Glee Club and I watch a couple of imperfect performances...
and a litany of criticisms just start building up inside of me like a volcano...
and I keep telling myself to hold it in, and then it just comes bursting out.
Granted, generally, I'm right...
but doesn't do much for my reputation.
It does suck when you do that.
So, uh, how do you think we can get people to see us differently?
I don't know.
I ca- I can't do this.
You know, whoever made that Glist is gonna put you at number one...
when they find out you cheated on thatJesse kid with me.
Besides, Jesse will never fully understand what it means to be a Jew.
No, l- I'm ironically turned on by your bad boy image...
but I think we should just keep this professional.
All right, I'm out.
- Why should I stay if there's no chance of us making out? - Uh, Noah...
Please come and sit down, and let's work on the project. Okay?
It'll help us both, I promise.
- [School Bell Rings] - I don't think I can do this.
Are you sure this is a good idea?
- Stop thinking about him and do it for yourself. - Okay.
- Okay, let's do this. - No, can't go in the teachers' lounge.
Lots of cruel, slow-motion laughter going on in there.
Well, look who it is! I thought I smelled a laughingstock.
Don't start with me, Castle, or I will kick you square in the taco.
It's a date. That's just a typical Saturday night in the Castle condo.
- I think it's mornings. - Yeah.
Go get 'im.
It's okay. It'll be all right, Mrs. Carlisle.
- Oh, it's just so- - Excuse me.
Oh, hey, Em. Can you just give us a sec?
Actually, no, Will. I can't give you a sec.
You're just gonna have to reschedule your heavy-petting session with Mrs. Carlisle.
- Emma! - I beg your pardon.
I was just telling Mr. Schuester about how my husband recently died.
Wow.
Getting them fresh off the rebound now, aren't you?
Amazing. Nobody's safe. Nobody is safe.
- Emma, can I talk to you in private? - No, you can't.
Will, we're gonna talk about this here and now because I have absolutely nothing to hide.
Actually, did you know I was seeing a therapist?
Did you know I've been trying to work through my O.C.D. So I could be with you?
Will, do you think that's fun for me?
It's not fun. It's absolutely humiliating.
And come to find out you've been fooling around with some woman named Shelby...
and you slept with April Rhodes.
- How did you find out about that? - You're not denying it.
Wow. Okay. See, I thought we were trying to work through this.
I thought when you said you were trying to figure out things on your own...
I thought you meant that.
I'm not gonna stand for this anymore. I'm not.
I'm putting my foot down, and I'm finally sticking up for myself.
You're a slut, Will.
You're a slut. You're a slut, you're a slut, you're a slut.
Everybody should know that, and you should know that I'm through with you.
I'm very sorry for your loss.
[School Bell Rings]
Looks like we got a full house, y'all.
I'm kind of getting cold feet here.
- Can you even feel your feet? - Shh!
Team, listen up. If we pull this off, we will be legends at this school.
We'll rocket up the Glist. We'll be top five, easy.
Artie, pump up the jam. It's about to go down.
- # U can't touch this # - ## [Pop]
- #My, my, my # - # U can't touch this #
♪ My music hits me so hard Makes me say, Oh, my Lord ♪
♪Thank you for blessing me with a mind to rhyme and two hyped feet ♪
♪ It feels good when you know you're down ♪
♪A superdope homeboy from the Oaktown ♪
♪And I'm known as such ♪
♪And this is a beat, uh U can't touch ♪
♪ I told you, homeboy ♪
♪ Can't touch this ♪
- #Yo, let me bust this funky lyric # - # Can't touch this #
♪ Fresh new kicks and pants ♪
♪You gotta like that Now you know you wanna dance ♪
♪ So move outta your seat and get a fly girl and catch this beat ♪
♪While it's rolling, hold on ♪
♪ Pump a little bit and let 'em know it's going on ♪
♪ Like that, like that ♪
♪ Cold on a mission, so fall on back ♪
♪ Let 'em know that you're too much ♪
♪And this is a beat, uh you can't touch ♪
♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
♪Yo, I told you Can't touch this ♪
- #Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh # - # U can't touch this #
- # Oh, oh, oh, oh # - #Yeah, U can't touch this #
- # Oh, oh, oh # - # I told you, can't touch this #
- # Oh, oh, oh, oh # - #Too high, U can't touch this #
♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪
♪Yo, we out of here Can't touch this ♪♪
Here it comes.
That was very cute.
I'm gonna talk to my pastor and see if I can't get you kids...
to perform that for our Sunday service.
Look, I don't like doing this any more than you do...
but if I don't find out who made that Glist and stop another one from being published...
the whole Glee Club's going down, and I can't let that happen.
Look, I know I've been kind of angry lately, and sometimes I kick over chairs and stuff...
but I didn't do it.
All the pieces fit. You have a very big ax to grind with several people on that Glist.
Quinn broke your heart, Puck betrayed your friendship...
you're dealing with Kurt's dad dating your mom.
And I happen to know you've had your ups and downs with Santana and Brittany.
I have nothing against Santana, and I like Brittany.
Quinn's the one that has a beef with them.
Well, there are an awful lot of Cheerios on that Glist.
Isn't it true that you still feel like an outcast in that group?
I don't know what you're talking about. I like being a Cheerio.
And why does everyone just assume I'm angry all the time?
It's called being sassy, Mr. Schue.
It's simple math, Mr. Schue.
The Glists are posted at a height of five and a half feet, comfortably out of my reach.
It could not have been me. And I have it on good word that...
- I saw Puck putting up the Glist in the hallway. - I was moving it!
Somebody put it on Rachel's locker, so I moved it.
I was being a man, doing the right thing.
At some point, the lies are gonna stop, and you're gonna start to sing.
If I did it, why would I put myself at number three?
As far as badasses go, I'm number "wha."
I'll say it again, I didn't do it!
I don't know how to turn on a computer.
Rachel did it. Think about it. I stole the guy she's in love with...
then stole the guy she dated to get over the guy she's in love with...
and I'm a bitch to her.
- Just doesn't seem like Rachel. - She's gone behind your back before.
And I mean, who's to say that there's only one culprit?
Look, I know you know something!
So we're not leaving here until I get some answers!
Mr. Schuester, may I be blunt?
[Sighs] Shoot.
Ever since you separated from your wife...
you've spent a lot of late nights watching reruns of Law & Order, haven't you?
Hmm. Thought so.
And no, I didn't make the Glist.
[Sighs] Right.
[School Bell Rings]
We're as menacing as Muppet Babies...
which means our squeaky-clean reputations are still very much intact.
We have to do what we've been dreading...
something more terrifying than Rachel's personality.
We have to go to Sylvester and admit that we posted the "Physical" video.
- But we'll get suspended. - And it will be worth it.
Finally, the entire student body will see us as badasses.
[Thinking] DearJournal...
I don't know how much longer I can take the humiliation.
The video has just surpassed three million hits.
Is my misery some kind of karmic retribution...
for the way I've treated people?
[Phone Rings]
[Rings]
- You're go for Sue. - Hello? Sue?
It's Olivia Newton-John, star of Grease...
the most successful movie musical of all time.
Nice try, and that's a ridiculous accent.
Uh...
[Thinking] Journal, I've learned my lesson.
Sue Sylvester's gotta start playing nice full time.
[Rings]
Hi! Uh, we must have been cut off.
It's Olivia Newton-John. I released a record seven consecutive number-one singles.
- Sing something. - # Let's get physical, physical #
That song was the best-selling record of the '80s.
Listen, Sue, I'm headed for a ribbon-cutting ceremony...
at a sanctuary for orphaned koalas...
but I heard my daughter Chloe laughing at something on the Internet the other day...
and I saw your video.
And I just have to ask...
whatever would possess a person to do something like that?
Well, I gotta tell you, Olivia, that video was never meant for public consumption.
Some people enjoy videotaping themselves being intimate with a partner.
I happen to enjoy revisiting the impeccable form of my various Jazzercise routines.
Well, it got me thinking. You know, that song was the biggest hit of my career.
"Physical" spent 10 weeks at number one.
- It's a classic. - I agree.
Unfortunately, I botched the video...
which, by the way, was one of the first music videos ever.
But I filled it with obese guys in spandex...
and it went over the top, and the song went with it.
But I saw your YouTube video, Sue...
and I realized that now is the time to save it- and possibly you.
I'll be in Ohio tomorrow chairing a benefit...
for Save the Rain Forests at King's Island.
- I don't understand. - [School Bell Rings]
All right, Schue. Nice.
Hey, man-whore.
- Will Schuester? - Yeah.
I'm Brenda Castle. I'm the new astronomy teacher and badminton coach.
I also happen to be an alcoholic, and I like pills.
I hear that's just your type.
- Let's go in this classroom and pork! - No.
I'm praying for you, William.
We've all heard about your gallivanting!
But nothing happened!
Maybe that's not what matters, Will.
You broke the heart of somebody who doesn't let people get close to her.
I didn't mean to hurt anybody.
You probably didn't mean to hurt me either...
but lately I've been feeding my feelings to the tune of 6,000 calories a day.
[Sighs]
Slut.
- [School Bell Rings] - Remember...
If Sylvester hits you in the face after you cop to posting the video...
don't scream like a woman.
- You're so brave for doing this, Kurt. - I know. Thank you.
Oh, my God!
Coach Sylvester, can I have just a minute of your time?
What do you want, lady-face?
You're aware a tape was leaked onto the Internet...
causing you to become a national laughingstock?
We stole the tape from your syringe-and-pill drawer. We posted it online.
- We'll accept whatever punishment you see fit. - So it was you.
I can't thank you enough.
She wasn't angry at all. It was weird.
Maybe the comments online have gotten so mean, and people have started to feel sorry for her.
She's finally getting some sympathy, so she's in a forgiving mood.
Wait a second. Take a look at this.
♪♪ ["Physical"]
Isn't that...
#Physical, physical Physical, physical #
#I'm saying all the things that I know you'll like #
♪ Making good conversation ♪
♪ I gotta handle you just right ♪
♪You know what I mean ♪
♪ I took you to an intimate restaurant ♪
♪Then to a suggestive movie ♪
♪There's nothing left to talk about ♪
♪ Unless it's horizontally ♪
♪ Let's get physical, physical ♪
♪ I wanna get physical ♪
♪ Let's get into physical ♪
♪ Let me hear your body talk your body talk ♪
♪ Let me hear your body talk ♪
#Let's get physical, physical #
#I want to get physical #
♪ Let's get into physical ♪
♪ Let me hear your body talk your body talk ♪
♪ Let me hear your body talk ♪
#Bah-bah-bah-body talk #
♪ I've been patient I been good ♪
- #Trying to keep my hands on the table # - # Table #
♪ It's getting hard this holding back ♪
♪You know what I mean ♪
♪ I'm sure you'll understand my point of view ♪
♪We know each other mentally ♪
# You've gotta know that you're bringin'out #
♪The animal in me ♪
♪ Let's get physical, physical ♪
#I want to get physical #
♪ Let's get into physical ♪
♪ Let me hear your body talk your body talk ♪
♪ Let me hear your body talk ♪
#Physical, physical Physical, physical #
♪ Let me hear your body talk your body talk ♪
♪ Let me hear your body talk ♪
♪ Let's get physical ♪♪
- [Mercedes] Phewl - [Applause]
Again, again, again, again, again, again, again, again!
- All day. - I need to learn to do this verse.
[School Bell Rings]
All right, guys, listen up.
Another week has almost passed.
If a list goes up again later today, this issue is out of my hands...
and it becomes Principal Figgins's jurisdiction.
Seriously, Mr. Schue, whoever made that list is not gonna come forward.
We might as well just bend over and take whatever's coming.
Fine.
Okay. Well, then, uh, let's get to it.
Rachel, how 'bout you show us your bad reputation project?
I'd like to say a few words first.
Though I understand that a motion picture should stand on its own...
I do realize that some of you are not well-versed...
in the complex vocabulary of the filmic arts.
I expect that this video will go over some of the heads of our less-cultured teammates.
So let me just say I hope you enjoy my bad reputation.
Lights. Okay, go.
[Beeps]
♪♪ [Vocalizing]
♪ Daddy, please don't It wasn't his fault ♪
♪ He means so much to me ♪
♪ Daddy, please don't We're gonna get married ♪
♪Just you wait and see ♪
♪ Every night the same old dream ♪
#I hate to close my eyes #
♪ I can't erase the memory ♪
♪The sound ofJulie's cry ♪
♪ She called me up late that night ♪
♪And she said Joe, don't come over ♪
♪ My dad and I just had a fight ♪
♪And he stormed out the door ♪
#I've never seen him act this way #
#My God, he's going crazy #
♪ He said he's gonna make you pay ♪
#For what we've done He's got a gun #
♪ So run, Joey, run ♪
♪Joey, run ♪
♪ Daddy, please don't It wasn't his fault ♪
♪ He means so much to me ♪
♪ Daddy, please don't We're gonna get married ♪
♪Just you wait and see ♪
[Jesse] #Got in my car and drove like mad #
♪Till I reached Julie's place ♪
♪ She ran to me with tear-filled eyes ♪
♪And bruises on her face ♪
♪All at once I saw him there ♪
- #Sneaking up behind me # - Watch out!
♪Then Julie yelled He's got a gun ♪
♪ She stepped in front of me ♪
♪Then suddenly a shot rang out ♪
#And I saw Julie falling #
♪ I ran to her I held her close ♪
♪When I looked down my hands were red ♪
♪And here's the last words Julie said ♪
♪ Daddy, please don't It wasn't his fault ♪
♪ He means so much to me ♪
♪ Daddy, please don't We're gonna get married ♪
##[Girls Vocalizing]
♪ Run, Joey, run ♪
♪Joey, run Joey, run ♪
#Joey, run Joey, run #
♪Joey, run ♪♪
♪♪ [Vocalizing]
Well, why don't we just, um, take a moment...
to really absorb what we've just watched?
- This is garbage! - Finn! - No, he's right.
I need to trust my instincts more because I had a feeling when we were shooting that...
that it was not gonna be good.
Why didn't you tell me they were in this too? I thought you and I were going out.
Being triple cast with two other guys to play opposite your girlfriend- it's mortifying.
- It was an artistic statement. - [Finn] No, it wasn'tl
It was you trying to look like you had a bunch of guys fighting over you...
so you could stop looking like some kind of outcast and be seen as some hot, slutty girl singer!
How could you do this to me, to all us guys?
Is your stupid reputation more important than your relationships?
Jesse, wait.
[Jean] I saw your video, Sue. You were fabulous.
You know, I have to thank you, Jean.
You always know exactly what to say to me when I lose my way.
Turns out all I needed was an attitude change.
I forgot how good it feels to give back.
I've spent so much time worrying about what other people thought about me...
when there's really only one person in the world I want to impress.
- Who? - Who? You, silly.
So, yesterday, I walked back into that teachers'lounge...
and I calmly informed them of my unlikely skyrocket to showbiz fame...
and very gently told them all...
I just didn't care what they thought about me.
What's that? Oh, look! Sue Sylvester is a Top 700 recording artist, people!
Who's laughing now, huh?
Now, since Olivia's giving her cut of the proceeds to injured manatees...
I've decided to give all of my profits to this nursing home.
It's not gonna be much. Olivia totally screwed me in negotiations.
I won't be working with her again.
But it should be enough for a couple of benches out back for the summer...
maybe a little vegetable garden for you to putter around in.
- That'd be nice. - Yeah.
Now, after all these years...
how is it that you still know so much more about everything than I do?
I'm the smart one.
- And you got the looks too. How's that fair? - Ah, thank you.
[Laughs] Let's say we crack open a book, huh?
- Okay. - See that? Two little bears?
- That's you and I. - That's right. I'm the big one, right?
- And I'm the small one. - Yeah, you're the tiny one. And what does that say?
"I always love you."
And I will always love you.
[School Bell Rings]
- [Knocking] - Hey.
Uh, these are for you.
They're lovely. Thank you.
[Clears Throat] Um...
l-I messed up, Emma.
I think, in all of this "discovering who I am" business...
I took a couple of wrong turns.
And I get how those detours might have hurt you.
But now I know that that's not who I am...
or who I want to be.
I know what's supposed to happen now.
I'm supposed to smile and be impressed by how in touch you are with your feelings...
and moon over the fact that you care about me so much, but, um...
I can't.
But, Emma, th-this is- this is killing me.
I just...
[Exhales] I want you to look at me the way you used to.
I can't. [Clears Throat]
But you know what? That's a good thing.
Really, if this relationship is ever gonna work between the two of us...
we have to start seeing each other for who we really are.
Thank you for the flowers.
- I know you're behind the Glist. - You have no proof.
I can't believe that you're gonna pin this on me. I'll be expelled.
I mean, it makes sense.
Everything else has been taken from me- my popularity, my body.
Might as well throw away my education.
You know when I realized that you did it?
The moment I felt what it was like to walk in your shoes.
I mean, it takes years to build a good reputation...
but only seconds to destroy it.
Couple bad choices, and you go from the top to the bottom.
You have lost so much, Quinn...
which means you had the most to gain from the Glist.
I never meant to hurt anybody.
I know.
I was captain of the cheerleading squad, president of the Celibacy Club.
I had Finn.
People would part like the Red Sea when I walked down the hallway.
- Now I'm invisible. - And you think being seen as a cheap tramp is better?
A bad reputation is better than no reputation at all.
Look, I know that high school feels like your whole life right now...
but it's going to end.
You're gonna give that baby to a family who really wants it, who's gonna love it...
and then you are gonna go on to do amazing things, Quinn.
You really think that I can get it all back one day?
[Exhales]
No.
I think you can get something even better.
- I mean, come on! You're Quinn Fabray, right? - [Chuckles]
Those people didn't part when you walked down the halls, you moved them with your attitude.
Thanks, Mr. Schue.
You're a really good teacher...
even if everybody is calling you a man-whore.
You wanted to see me, William?
I trust you have come up with the perpetrators of the Glist.
I, um-I grilled every single one of my students...
and, uh, no one...
no one copped to making the Glist.
They all closed ranks and wouldn't rat out who did it.
That's poppycock, Will.
I will not let this school be held hostage by juvenile shenanigans.
I know, but I mean, your point has been made. The Glists have stopped.
I think we should just call this a victory and move on.
Fine.
I'm still praying for you, Will.
- [Whispers] Thank you. - [School Bell Rings]
Hi. Are you still mad at me?
You know, before I transferred here to make you my girlfriend...
I asked around about you, found out your rep, what kind of girl you were.
- What did they say? - Most of them had no idea who you were.
The ones that did said you were kind of sneaky hot...
but that that quality was canceled out by a compulsive need to be right...
and a strange affinity for sweaters with animals on them.
The most interesting part was that even though no one particularly liked you...
they all said you were a person who could be trusted.
I still am!
I have this pathological need to be popular, okay?
L- I just want people to think I'm cool so bad sometimes...
that it just clouds my judgment.
As a fellow star in the making, I'm sure you can understand that.
On that level, sure.
As the guy who gave up everything to be your one and only...
I just can't see past this.
I should have been enough for you, Rachel.
I knew you'd break my heart.
Well, that's the funny thing about reputations.
Everyone thinks I'm the big heartbreaker...
but the fact of the matter is...
you broke mine first.
Do me a favor.
If we end up next to each other on the bar at Ballet Club this week...
just do your arabesques and piqués in silence.
Don't talk to me.
##[Rock Ballad]
♪Turn around ♪
♪ Every now and then I get a little bit lonely ♪
♪And you're never comin' round ♪
♪Turn around ♪
#Every now and then I get a little bit tired #
#Oflistening to the sound of my tears #
♪Turn around ♪
♪ Every now and then I get a little bit terrified ♪
♪And then I see the look in your eyes ♪
♪Turn around, bright eyes ♪
♪ Every now and then I fall apart ♪
♪And I need you now tonight ♪
♪And I need you more than ever ♪
#And if you'll only hold me tight #
# We'll be holding on forever #
♪And we'll only be making it right ♪
♪ 'Cause we'll never be wrong ♪
♪Together we can take it to the end of the line ♪
♪Your love is like a shadow on me all of the time ♪
#All of the time #
♪ I don't know what to do I'm always in the dark ♪
♪We're living in a powder keg and giving off sparks ♪
♪ I really need you tonight ♪
♪ Forever's gonna start tonight ♪
#Forever's gonna start tonight #
♪ Once upon a time there was light in my life ♪
#Now I'm only falling apart #
♪There's nothing I can say ♪
♪A total eclipse of the heart ♪
♪Turn around, bright eyes ♪
♪ Every now and then I fall apart ♪
♪Turn around, bright eyes ♪
♪ Every now and then I fall apart ♪
♪And I need you now tonight ♪
♪And I need you more than ever ♪
♪And we'll only be making it right ♪
♪ 'Cause we'll never be wrong ♪
♪Together we can take it to the end of the line ♪
♪Your love is like a shadow on me all of the time ♪
#All of the time #
♪ I don't know what to do I'm always in the dark ♪
♪We're living in a powder keg and giving off sparks ♪
♪ I really need you tonight ♪
♪ Forever's gonna start tonight ♪
[Chorus] #Forever's gonna start tonight #
♪ Once upon a time I was falling in love ♪
♪ Now I'm only falling apart ♪
♪There's nothing I can do ♪
♪A total eclipse of the heart ♪
♪Turn around, bright eyes ♪♪
[School Bell Rings]
##[Vocalizing]
##[Harmonic Vocalizing]
##[Ends]
ENGLISH - US - SDH